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Let Us Hear the Copyright Strikes! - 21st October 2024
40 Plays2 months ago
Season 4, Episode 7 of News Rodeo. We look back on the news and try to find the funny side. In this episode we cover a range of topics from shoe sniffers to offensive fan edits to Trump's music session.
Connect with us around the web: linktr.ee/newsrodeopod
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Transcript
Introduction to News Rodeo
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello and welcome to News Rodeo, the bite-sized news roundup where we laugh at the world to feel a little less sad. I'm Jonah and I'm Hannah. Let's get this rind up started. Yeehaw!
Unlikely Survival and School Suspensions
00:00:10
Speaker
A tortoise has lived to see another day after it arrived in a waste lorry and went through an entire sorting process at a recycling center. Loving lettuce, the sun and a slow walk in the grass, Barry the bin man who found the tortoise was said to be very relieved. Cooked school dinners have been suspended at a comprehensive school in Wales after mice were found running around its kitchen. However, under further investigation, the mice were actually rats who are distinguished chefs in their native France.
Suspicious Containers and Airline Allergies
00:00:40
Speaker
Authorities in Tennessee continued to investigate a container suspected of holding large amounts of dynamite, warning residents that evacuations will likely continue throughout the night.
00:00:51
Speaker
After seeing a large ACME logo printed on the side, police claim a confidential informant helped them point towards the container. When asked for comment, the informant stated, Mimi, allergy specialists say there is no evidence not allergens are spread around the cabin by ventilation systems on planes. However, the band busted should refrain from throwing peanuts down the aisle in an attempt to make air hostesses smile as you may actually kill them.
Cacti Ban and Trump’s Town Hall
00:01:19
Speaker
A German town has banned cacti from schools, nursery, and the town hall after a man was injured by one in a local school. The move has been widely supported by all but one anonymous protester. However, news radio intel suggests this protester is simply a plant. I think cacti are succulents. But how am I meant to know? I haven't eaten one.
00:01:39
Speaker
Former President Trump stopped taking questions at a town hall event. And he said- Let's not do jokes. Who the hell was to hear jokes? Let me hear that music, please. What, Jonah? The whole point of this- Let me hear that music. Jonah, the whole point of this podcast- Loud! Nice and loud.
00:01:58
Speaker
Jonah, we're going to get hit with copyright strikes. We can't do this. Play YMCA. Go ahead, let's go. Nice and loud.
00:02:26
Speaker
we seriously need to get back to jokes. Fine, I will make jokes great again.
Celebrity Confusions and Apologies
00:02:32
Speaker
Garfield has said he doesn't think he wants kids. I guess lasagna is just that fulfilling. I think it was actually Andrew Garfield who said that, not the fat lasagna-loving cat. Oh, okay. Well, hang on. I can rework it. um Andrew Garfield has said he doesn't think he wants kids. I guess having Mary Jane in your life is just that fulfilling. Mary Jane wasn't in that Spider-Man film, not in any of his Spider-Man films, actually. I think it was Gwen Stacy. Who's Gwen Stacy? It doesn't work with the joke. Just move on. okay
00:03:06
Speaker
The BBC has apologised to users after its weather app mistakenly forecast for hurricane winds near London and temperatures over 400 degrees C in Nottingham. Being England following the reports, trains to Nottingham were completely full with men in white vests, shorts and Stella Artois in hand making their way to top up their tan.
Corporate Misconduct and Competitions
00:03:26
Speaker
Workers at Meta have reportedly been sacked for abusing the tech firm's meal voucher system, such as using it to buy toothpaste and washing powder. What they don't understand is that Tide Pods are the tastiest snack one could purchase. That's a retro joke. a retro joke The World Conquer Championship said on Tuesday that it was investigating allegations of cheating after this year's winner was found to have a steel chestnut in his pocket. Fans from both sides have come to defame or defend the champion, and much like the opponent's conquer, public opinion is split right down the middle.
00:04:04
Speaker
More than a thousand TGI Friday's yeah UK staff will be made redundant despite a rescue deal from the owners of restaurant group D and&D London. The staff were told the news in a slightly unusual way on a call that went like this.
Fatherhood and Social Media Edits
00:04:45
Speaker
to you Movie icon Al Pacino has stated that being a dad is fun after recently having a child aged 84. Though we can't be sure, we think it's because it gives him an excuse to once again introduce his child by saying, say hello to my little friend.
00:05:07
Speaker
You okay, Hannah? No, I'm not actually. What's wrong? You posted a photo of me on Instagram. I did. I know. And in that photo, you edited sunglasses over my eyes. Yeah, to make it look funny. I am a real life human being who chose to look right down the barrel of the camera to you, the viewer, because without words, we communicate with our eyes.
00:05:39
Speaker
Well, I mean, you do communicate with words because it is a podcast. To edit my face and hide my eyes is to erase me. And that is just deeply hurtful. This has reminded me of a news story from last week. An actress was like upset about a fan edit of the Wicked movie poster, which like covered her eyes to make it look like the Broadway poster. Are you Cynthia Riva? I'm not that girl.
Geographic Mishaps and Restructuring Plans
00:06:07
Speaker
This is a news podcast, so we'll turn our attention now to the Middle East. The headlines. A 13-year-old boy has been arrested after axes, a sword, and a knife were seized. A milk float was stolen on its morning route, and a bright yellow bollard in a little car park is causing havoc for drivers, with 10 cars having allegedly crashed into it in just two years. In the Middle East. Middle East. Oh, sorry, East Midlands. I said that wrong. all right Boo Hoo, the online fashion retailer, is struggling and as a result is planning a major restructure that could see the breakup of the firm whose brands include Debenham's, Karen Millen, and Pretty Little Thing. That's sad.
00:06:49
Speaker
yeah booho A judge in northern Greece imposed a one month prison sentence on a man convicted of disturbing his neighbours by repeatedly sneaking into their properties to smell their shoes.
Quirky Crimes and Audience Engagement
00:07:02
Speaker
Although the man seemed proud of his actions, when reached out to by News Rodeo for comment, Mr Sniffolotta Shoes did not respond.
00:07:09
Speaker
Thank you so much for listening. If you want to suggest a topic for us to talk about next time, you can find us on X or TikTok at News Rodeo Pod or on Instagram at News Rodeo Podcast. Also, if you want to ensure you never miss an episode, subscribe where you get your podcasts and tell your friends to do the same. Goodbye.