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Her Back Pain Disappeared
258 Plays1 year ago
Ashlee Hoelck suffered from chronic, life-disrupting back pain for 12 years. One day, a simple realization made the pain disappear. She shares her story, and how she's now helping others overcome their own pain.
To work with Ashlee Hoelck, visit her website at https://phoenixrizecoaching.com
Find Ashlee on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ashlee_hoelck/
And check out her podcast, Thriving After Abuse
Get my Free PCOS Thrive Guide Here! These are all the supplements I was taking when I got pregnant and more than 40 pages of research-backed information to help with hormone balance.
The Life Detox is brought to you by Bubble & Bee Organic
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Transcript
Ashley's Journey with Chronic Pain
00:00:06
Speaker
Ashley Hollick suffered from debilitating back pain for 12 years. It interrupted her life. She was bedridden at times. The doctors couldn't help her much or give her any answers. Then one day something changed all of that and she found almost instant healing. Today she'll share her story and tell us the pivotal experience that changed her life and how she's now helping others.
00:00:32
Speaker
I'm Stephanie Greenwood and this is the Life Detox. Ashley's pain had become a big part of her life.
00:00:55
Speaker
I had 12 years of chronic back pain as well as really bad anxiety and depression and also stomach pains where I went to the emergency room a few times. My back pain wasn't like, oh, I have a little back ache or anything. It was pretty severe pain.
00:01:12
Speaker
I threw my back out eight times starting from the age of 21 till I think I was 26. It felt like somebody was ripping the muscles off of my spine. It was severe pain all of the time. When I was 21, I threw it out twice in one month. And so as a 21 year old, I said, that is really, really bizarre. And so I went to the doctor and they did x-rays and they said I had bulging on my L4, my L5, which are like your lower discs. And they said it was the worst they'd seen for so long my age.
00:01:40
Speaker
And they're like, there's just a lot of, you know, speculation. Oh, maybe it's from slouching so much. You know, I was just getting out of my teen years where slouching was the thing to do. And, you know, maybe it's genetic or, you know, but no real answers about it. I had no reasons as to why my back was so terrible.
Healing Through Manifestation
00:01:59
Speaker
Ashley had just learned to live with the pain, but one day she happened to sign up for a program that changed her life.
00:02:06
Speaker
I ended up in a manifestation course and I thought, oh, this will be really fun. Like I'm going to make vision boards and do all this like really cool light stuff. And it just ended up being this deep healing container. And after those five weeks of doing all of these different work and exercises and a lot, a lot of crying, so much crying, I woke up and my back didn't hurt anymore.
00:02:34
Speaker
My pain and all of my other issues, they all stemmed from the emotional trauma of an abusive relationship that I was in in my teens. I realized how much anger and hate and all of these thoughts of, you know, why did you do this to me? You did so many terrible things to me. I can't believe you did this. And now it's affecting me in all of these other ways.
00:03:00
Speaker
And so I realized that I was holding on to so much. 12 years later, you know, I'm married to an amazing man. I have two kids. We have an amazing house. Like, everything's going great, but I'm still stewing, right? And so I realized I had a lot more work to do. And for the longest time, I thought I healed. I don't have any of my PTSD triggers. I'm not
00:03:23
Speaker
flinching when somebody tries to give me a high five, things like that. So I thought, oh, I'm healed. I'm just like, I'm a little quirky, right?
00:03:31
Speaker
And so inside of this container, I started doing all of these different exercises and techniques, meditations, and a lot of releasing and forgiving of not only myself, but my abuser too. And it was a new perspective of forgiveness that I was able to get on board with. And this process probably took me about five weeks. It's like an eight week course, but you know, I kind of powered through it when the kids were asleep.
Understanding and Sharing Healing
00:03:57
Speaker
No one ever asked,
00:03:58
Speaker
have you been in any sort of emotional trauma, which I realized two years ago after I did this work that my back started hurting almost right after the relationship ended and I never really connected the dots. After the pain went away, she hesitated to trust that her back was actually healed, as she'd been in pain for so long and it wasn't like she'd undergone a medical procedure.
00:04:23
Speaker
At first, I thought maybe I was just having a good couple of days and then maybe a good couple of weeks and I definitely kept it to myself because mostly one, I didn't know how I would explain it to somebody. Like, oh, I wrote a letter, I ripped it up and I flushed it down the toilet and my back pain went away. Like it all seemed so magical and woo-woo and out there, even for me who was, you know, a little bit woo-woo at the time.
00:04:51
Speaker
And then I also thought people would think, well, if you made it go away with your mind, then maybe you were making it up the whole time. And that's why you made us pick up everything. And, you know, all of these thoughts of like, what, what would other people think? After about like six months, I kind of started telling the people closest to me, like,
00:05:08
Speaker
Guess what? Just like whispering it to them. And then after about a year, I said, and during this first year, I'm starting to read more about how trauma affects us, how it affects our brains, how there's been scientific studies done and actual research and brain scans, where I was like,
00:05:26
Speaker
Oh, it's not really magic. Like this is actually happening. And it's not just happening to me because I was hearing all these other stories. Ashley took her experience and created a healing program of her own. She's trying to spread the word and help others heal.
00:05:42
Speaker
I didn't have to be in pain for 12 years. I could have healed a lot sooner. Now that is what I'm all about. That's what I'm passionate about. I'm creating programs that people can enroll in so they can learn all about these different healing modalities so that they can learn about how trauma affects them and get empowerment that they can in fact change it, that they're not broken or damaged goods or that that's just how they're going to be for the rest of their life.
Healing Programs and Techniques
00:06:12
Speaker
Ashley is trained in the modality of EFT
00:06:35
Speaker
You're tapping on the meridian energy points, similar to acupressure. I love this modality because it's really, really simple and you can do it in three minutes and feel a shift. Like I've had people who have taken my little mini training and they're like, wow, I went from feeling an eight out of 10 to feeling a three after just
00:06:57
Speaker
One small tapping session. At the time of our recording back in January, Ashley was developing her offerings. Her program is now put together and launched and costs only $7 a month. Right now I'm currently building a membership. It's going to be a build your own healing routine. You can go and be like, okay, I'm going to try EFT or maybe this hypnosis will be helpful or maybe timeline therapy.
00:07:20
Speaker
For the most part, it's going to be exercises, techniques, modalities that you can use at home, and there's going to be lots of different meditation styles. I am also certified as a clinical hypnotherapist, so there'll be hypnosis available. I'll have a hole.
00:07:36
Speaker
meditation and hypnosis library that I continually build inside
Personalized Healing Approaches
00:07:40
Speaker
of there. I will also be doing time techniques journaling. I will be adding integration journals. I've got so many ideas of what I want to do. The truth is I can tell you exactly what I did to heal my trauma and my pain, but it doesn't mean that it's going to work for you because we were all different humans. We all had different trauma and we're all going to take different things to heal. And I'm super excited about it. I know it's going to be really, really helpful.
Exploring Mind-Body Science
00:08:06
Speaker
We're going to take a quick break and when we come back, we'll talk more with Ashley about healing from abuse. And also, was it just coincidence that her back pain went away when she started doing inner work? We'll look into the science of the mind-body connection and how emotional pain causes physical pain. Stay tuned.
00:08:31
Speaker
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00:08:52
Speaker
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Key Steps in Trauma Healing
00:09:02
Speaker
.com. Okay, back to the show.
00:09:13
Speaker
So what would you tell somebody who's going through trauma? What are some simple things that they can do to start to heal? It can really be really hard to even start your healing journey if you're in it. If you're drinking a little bit of poison every single day, you're not going to be able to heal from the poison. Like you have to stop drinking the poison. And so once you get out of it, it's really important to love yourself and to go through a process of
00:09:42
Speaker
Forgiving yourself because I know there can be a lot of shame or guilt or regret or feeling that you are responsible for what happens. And so going through a process of moving through that, I know education is really important too.
00:09:58
Speaker
So whatever your specific trauma is, learning about it. You know, if you were with a narcissist, there are so many great books out there where you can learn and start to kind of understand that like it didn't just happen to you and it's not just that person that it's actually something that happens.
00:10:17
Speaker
on a very high level and that kind of helps you to feel that you're not alone
Navigating the Healing Process
00:10:23
Speaker
and that you are responsible to. So education is definitely really important. And then I think just starting, finding courses or coaches or a therapist, somebody to help you to work through your healing journey is
00:10:40
Speaker
a journey and it's going to have its ups and downs. It's not going to be butterflies and rainbows and it's not linear either. So you might have a really good day followed by a really bad day and that's okay. Absolutely. You can end up getting stuck in some of those stages of healing.
00:10:59
Speaker
For me, researching about narcissism and narcissistic personality disorder and emotional abuse, I was stuck in that phase for a couple of years as I was trying to get out. There are those natural steps of grief, and I think that it is a grieving process when you're getting out of an abusive relationship where there is an anger phase. And you felt what it feels like if you get stuck in that anger phase.
00:11:29
Speaker
It can be hard to take that next step. I agree. You can totally get stuck in different phases and you could feel like you're being re-traumatized or you start to be hard on yourself. A whole lot of this is keeping yourself grace, right? So many times after we get out of these relationships,
00:11:47
Speaker
We feel that we're not worthy and it's because of what this other person has told us. And so we've started to believe that story. And so starting to rewrite that story that you are worthy and it is okay and loving yourself throughout the process. And I think that is so, so important.
00:12:06
Speaker
Another good thing that could be helpful is to journal your progress. And it has to be a productive sort of journaling, not just writing like all of the terrible things that are happening, because I feel like, like talk therapy, that's kind of just like re traumatizing yourself and retriggering yourself, but kind of journaling and seeing
00:12:27
Speaker
the progress that you're going being sure to write when you are having good days or when you avoided a trigger or when you felt a trigger coming on and you were able to stop it because you used your deep breathing techniques that you had learned. And so when you feel like maybe you've hit a lull or maybe you feel that you haven't made progress, you can go back to those earlier entries and see, oh wow, look at how far I've come in the last six months. And then having a community too.
Impact of Emotional Trauma
00:12:53
Speaker
So you can go to that community and be like, I'm having a really hard day. Can somebody talk or can we chat? This journey is a lifelong one. So how does emotional trauma create chronic pain? Was it just a coincidence that Ashley's back healed when she did her manifestation program? For the answer, I turn to The Last Best Cure by Donna Jackson Nakazawa, who will be on our show in a few weeks. This is an excerpt.
00:13:22
Speaker
When we're injured or feel a symptom flare, nerve fibers send danger signals to the brain. The brain makes a rapid decision as to whether these pain signals are worth getting all worked up about or not. And the thing that makes the brain decide one way or the other is whether or not we, personally, perceive that specific pain to be a threat.
00:13:45
Speaker
In other words, you might stub your toe and expect the pain to fade after you count to 25 because your parents always told you that's what happens when you stub a toe. You've stubbed your toe hundreds of times before and the pain always subsides. And so it does this time as well. Your brain isn't paying all that much attention. There is no perceived threat.
00:14:07
Speaker
But let's say you have a history of fairly severe arthritis and your left hip suddenly begins to ache right after you get out of bed or turn your alarm off. The ache seems sudden and deep and new. Moreover, its onset reminds you of when the pain in your other arthritic hip first began, the one for which you're currently considering a hip replacement.
00:14:29
Speaker
Your brain is suddenly ultra attentive to the danger messages now emanating from your left hip. Fight or flight. The pin response kicks in. What's up now? How much is it going to hurt?
00:14:44
Speaker
The sympathetic or stress-now nervous system gears up for battle. As the SNS kicks in, neurons fire and old neural networks are activated based on your past memories and experiences, which remind you of other potential threats.
00:15:00
Speaker
You might suddenly think of how when your grandmother started to have pain in both hips, she was in a wheelchair five years later. Or that when your other hip first started aching, you missed two weeks of work and you're pretty sure it cost you your promotion. Now you're really under threat. It's an ever expanding threat. It's not just your hip, it's your future, your independence, your mobility, your job, your finances. The brain begins to add up all these potential perceived threats.
00:15:29
Speaker
danger impulses multiply, and pain amplifies. For someone else, the same level of pain in his or her left hip might be perceived as a 2 on a scale of 1 to 10. It's an ache, like a stubbed toe, that will surely dissipate.
00:15:46
Speaker
But because of the perceived threat, this same pain represents to you and to your brain. For you, it's a 7 out of 10. It really, really hurts. It's scary how much it hurts. The pain isn't imagined. It's quite real.
00:16:04
Speaker
We think of physical pain and emotional pain as being two separate things, but they aren't. The brain regions involved in experiencing signals of physical pain are the same brain regions involved in our perception of emotional pain. That was an excerpt from The Last Best Cure
Empowerment in Healing
00:16:32
Speaker
by Donna Jackson Nakazawa.
00:16:35
Speaker
I asked Ashley if there were any final words she wanted to leave with our listeners. Something I always like to say because I think it's so important is that the trauma is not your fault. It's not your fault and it wasn't okay and it's not all right, but your healing is your responsibility. Like I said earlier, I can't heal you. Nobody can heal you. Your therapist can't heal you. You're the only person who can heal you.
00:17:05
Speaker
Unfortunately, it is your responsibility. And so I think it's so important to recognize that you have the power and you are in control and you can heal yourself. It is possible.
00:17:20
Speaker
To work with Ashley Hulick, the manifesting maven, as she goes by, visit her website at PhoenixRiseRiseWithAZCoaching.com, which I've linked to in the show notes. I've also linked to her Instagram, where she shares tips and affirmations. I've also linked to her podcast, Thriving After Abuse. It's great. Go check it out.
00:17:45
Speaker
And as a reminder, if you're doing all the inner work and meditating and journaling and manifesting and going to therapy and living a healthy lifestyle, but you're still struggling with chronic pain, mysterious health conditions, or hormone imbalances, have a talk with yourself because you might be in an abusive relationship, whether it's a family member, a boss, or a lover.
00:18:12
Speaker
Ask yourself if you need a life detox.
Podcast Disclaimers and Next Episode
00:18:24
Speaker
The Life Detox is produced by me, Stephanie Greenwood, and brought to you by Bubble and Be Organic. The views and opinions expressed are the speakers' own and do not necessarily represent those of myself or my company. Material and information presented here is for general information purposes only and is not medical advice. Being a guest on this show does not imply endorsement of Greenplay LLC or any of its projects. Stay well, friends.
00:18:55
Speaker
Next week on The Life Detox. As women with PCOS, we may have a high risk of ovarian and other reproductive cancers. But ovarian cancer is notoriously difficult to detect and diagnosis can be invasive.
00:19:12
Speaker
We'll speak with Dan Yur, who will tell us how researchers are using artificial intelligence to detect ovarian cancer and other projects on the forefront of this new technology. I hope you'll join us.
00:19:39
Speaker
Lay with us your grits and joy of your life.