Transcript
Speaker: I was completely shocked. I think that in many ways, everyone would talk about how it was their dream to be in New York City Ballet. And I mean, I remember going to shows as a student and almost feeling like this heartache of wanting that so bad But I think that I always tried to temper that desire and you know, almost didn't let myself even think that was on the horizon for me.
Speaker: I'm Caitlin, a former professional ballerina turned dance educator and career mentor. And this is the Brand New Ballerina podcast. I am here for the aspiring professional ballerina who wants to learn what it really takes to build a smart and sustainable career in the dance industry. I'm peeling back the curtain of the professional dance world with open and honest conversations about the realities of becoming a professional dancer.
Speaker: Come along to gain the knowledge and inspiration you need to succeed in a dance career on your terms.
Speaker: Hello and welcome to the Brainy Ballerina Podcast. I'm your host, Caitlin Sloan, and I am joined today by Gabriella Domini. Gabriella is a dancer in the Corte Ballet at New York City Ballet, and today we're going to talk all about her experience dancing with New York City Ballet.
Speaker: But first, let's go back to the beginning. Gabriella, why did you take your very first dance class? Hi, Caitlin. Thanks so much for having me on. i'm so glad to be here. But my journey in ballet really started when I was you know young and me and my sister were always the kind of kids who would be putting on shows at home and you know dancing around the house. My parents always would have music playing at home. And so that's really where it all started with me and my sister kind of just, you know, being kids dancing around the house. But, you know, I was a very shy kid. And so, you know, my mom put me into dance classes, but I was always,
Speaker: so like anxious to leave her side. And it wasn't really until my sister start my little sister started taking dance classes that I think I, I remember watching her in class one day because I think, you know, I had tried it out and I, you know, it was just too nerve wracking for me at first. and I have this vivid memory of looking into the studio window in on my sister's class and being like, wait, I want to do that, too. And so it was, you know, ironic, but I really did follow in my little sister's footsteps in many ways. I think, you know, she kind of paved the way.
Speaker: You know, I remember my first performance ever. You know, I was up on stage and I was doing all the steps, but I think I cried through the entire performance and i you know, finished up and I remember my mom like,
Speaker: kind of i'm saying like i'm so proud of you but you never have to do that again and you know never pushing but i think i said something to her like well that was really scary but it was really fun and her just being like well okay like that's an interesting take. But you know, from there, you know, ballet was a way that I kind of built my confidence up. And, you know, over the years, it's become kind of this safe space to express myself. And yeah, that's kind of how it all started.
Speaker: What was your training like growing up once you decided that you wanted to keep going with ballet? Yeah. Like I kind of hinted at, my parents were always so supportive of me and my sister. My sister is also a dancer and has ended up as a soloist with Carolina Ballet. And, you know, with both of us, it was never something that they ever forced. They always kind of emphasize like this should be something that's fun. And, you know, so i started off taking classes very casually just at my corner dance studio kind of situation. And, you know did tap jazz ballet and i would just look forward to those nights that we had ballet class so much and you know I'm not sure it was the most popular class amongst my classmates I think the jazz and the taff was a little more like you know there was a little more freedom and i just
Speaker: looked forward to the ballet class. So I think when I was about nine, my mom is kind of seeing how much I enjoyed ballet class knew that ballet Arizona would have auditions for the Nutcracker, their production, and would have these auditions for children to come take part. in the shows. So i went and I auditioned and I'm pretty sure i remember being in this audition and there were a number of steps given in this audition class that I just had never even seen in my life. And so kind of you know, just faking my way through and trying to watch and mimic and
Speaker: After the audition, I was cast as like a little party girl and what we called bonbons, which were kind of the little like Paula Chanel Mother Ginger, you know, little dancers in the second act.
Speaker: And, you know, that season I got that experience of being in the Nutcracker and i just absolutely had the time of my life. I mean, talk about great memories. I think after that, you know, I was kind of hooked and my parents and I think maybe with the kind of encouragement of some of the teachers at Ballet, Arizona,
Speaker: put me in classes at the school, which was very exciting to me. I mean, my parents were sacrificing a lot and doing this, you know, it was a long drive getting me and my sister to classes there. and you know, so that was a challenge.
Speaker: stuck towards this leg ballet journey. And while I was at Ballet Arizona, E.B. Anderson was the director of the company at the time, and he used the school children so many productions. So, you know, Sleeping Beauty, obviously Nutcracker, or Don Quixote, and we really got to be on stage with the professionals. And I think having those performance experiences really made me fall in love with it.
Speaker: So, you know, I was there for a few years, had a couple wonderful teachers that I ended up following to another studio in Arizona called Ballet Etudes. That was kind of where I trained for a couple years before I eventually went to the School of American Ballet when I was 15.
Speaker: Did you start at the summer intensive? I did. Yes. So i first went to SAB for their summer course when I was 14 years old and i had such a wonderful summer there. i you know, had never, I had little tastes of, you know, the kind of Balanchine aesthetic and, You know, I would have a few teachers growing up that kind of would give steps and, you know, say this is kind of inspired by this Balanchine Ballet, a step that's in this particular ballet you know, and I had a couple teachers that kind of felt like that was a way of moving that kind of matched my kind of natural way of wanting to move, I think. So that first summer I went, you know, I really just kind of fell in love with, you know, the discipline of the technique, but also just the sense of freedom and the true like attention to musicality and just the intention put into every step.
Speaker: So I spent that summer SAB. I was actually asked to stay for the year round program that summer, you know, but I think going into that summer course in no way was that on my radar as that being kind of a possibility for me growing up in Arizona, New York was so far away. And Me and my family have always been very close. And so that was just kind of a huge unexpected leap to be presented with. So I actually ended up kind of waiting a year. My parents said, okay, like, let's,
Speaker: think on this, you can come back home, have another year at home, and maybe next year go back to the summer course with, you know, that as maybe a goal of something to work towards. And that definitely was a hard decision because, you know, I didn't know if that opportunity would present itself again. and so i remember going back home that year with kind of this,
Speaker: intense desire to kind of make that happen for myself and i really wanted to put in the work and have no regrets about going for that goal you know i was so lucky that that hard work kind of paid off and i was offered a year-round spot that next summer. but you know, I am also glad that my parents kind of saw that, you know, it wasn't the right time and made sure I was kind of prepared for that big leap before i you know, went for it.
Speaker: When you did move to New York, what was that transition like for you, both as far as dancing, but also just socially and emotionally as well? Oh my goodness. Yes. I mean, again, you know, growing up in Arizona, it was, you know, so culturally different from New York city and never in my life had I up until that point envisioned going and living so far from my family where like the only way to see each other was to jump on a six hour flight.
Speaker: And so, I mean, it was a huge transition. i think that the ballet element was almost a comfort to me. i loved kind of the intensity of the classes and just having your whole day revolve around this passion you had. It was very fulfilling, but definitely moving away from home. i mean, that first year i certainly had some moments of homesickness for sure.
Speaker: You know, I have to say I was so lucky. I had the most wonderful roommate my first year of SAB and she was like a big sister to me. And i think that in many ways she kind of got me through that first year.
Speaker: And i mean, even something like the first time I saw snow was that year SAB. And I remember we had a snow day and my roommate um was from Michigan. And so we had this snow day, no classes. And we decided we wanted to go to Central Park to see the snow after it had all kind of fallen. And i don't think I had a real winter coat even at this point. So I remember my roommate kind of helping me get dressed for the snow and, you know, just like things like that. It was so...
Speaker: much newness to take in and, but also so wonderful. So that was my first year at a b But then I had this kind of huge shift when it came to the second two years of my training there, because my sister was actually invited to come to the winter term. And we just had the time of our lives together. We were roommates while we were there.
Speaker: I mean, my sister is just like my best friend and I think. were both away from home and became so appreciative of one another and the support we could give each other. And i have this memory of one of the kind of resident assistants making this comment to me, like, Gabby, I feel like we are really seeing the full you since your sister has come. And in so many ways, i think that was true. Like my sister coming to the school just kind of freed me up to be myself. And i mean, it was like a priceless experience to share that with each other and to really just grow even closer through that.
Speaker: Were there any teachers or mentors that you had while you were at SAB who had a really big impact on your training? And what were some of the important lessons that they taught you? Absolutely. i mean, i always think to Katrina Killian, I feel like there were so many kind of little moments along the way that she really kind of opened the doors for me. I mean, she was my audition instructor when I auditioned for the summer course. And
Speaker: really made it possible for me to attend the summer course. I think that, you know, when I arrived at SAB, there were a couple little kind of opportunities with what they'd call like lecture demonstrations and different little performances where i felt like she kind of included me in some of those and really helped me have those experiences performance opportunities where, you know, I got to grow through that, but also just kind of show different facets of my dancing that maybe, know, are hard to get across in just a normal ballet class. So definitely, I'm very grateful to Katrina. and then i mean,
Speaker: Susie Pilar, Suki Shore, Kay Those were probably my main teachers when I was at the school. Also Darcy Kistler, she would teach our point classes, our PAW classes and You know, I think that those teachers I had, you know, all in their own way, kind of passed on this intentionality in how you moved, kind of moving with confidence and assuredness, but also freedom and, you know, the emphasis on musicality again. it kind of, in allowing yourself to explore that, it freed you up to just this whole other kind of level of joy in dancing. i mean, I think in different ways, they really supported me and pushed me to, to become, you know, a stronger version of myself and to kind of know how to like make things happen.
Speaker: to be in class and to push yourself to move bigger and faster and to really find joy in that kind of constant challenging of your own limits. I mean, so many things, but definitely just kind of, you know, they always pushed us to do our maximum, you know, and did it in a way that, you know, they were passing this on all the information they had on with, you know, a deep appreciation for the art form, but also for all of us kind of young students who are putting our energy towards it. So yeah, just so much gratitude for all of them.
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Speaker: How did you find out that you had a contract with New York City Ballet? Yes, I believe it was actually the day after Thanksgiving break. And I remember this class. I remember, i'm pretty sure it could have been, i don't want to say the worst class I've ever had, but I don't know what was happening. You know, we were coming off from break. I'm pretty sure the day before, I you know had flown in late at night from Arizona or you know sometimes me and my sister and a couple we had a couple other friends from Arizona and we would take a red eye overnight to get back to take classes and you know, so there was a lot at play, but i remember just being in K's class and I felt completely uncalibrated just had no sense of balance. I felt very uncoordinated and it was just the most kind of bizarre. Like I just felt like I kind of couldn't do anything that day.
Speaker: class finished and I kind of got my things collected and I was going to go, you know, regroup before point class and hopefully feel a little more on my leg.
Speaker: we were called me and a couple other girls so were called into Kay's office. And, you know, we went in and Kay said Peter Martins, who was the director of New York City Ballet at the time, is very interested in having you join as apprentices next season. And, you know, it was kind of presented as this is kind of what he has planned, but, you know, a lot can happen in a year. So, you know, make sure you stay focused and don't take this as,
Speaker: you know, a given. i was completely shocked. I think that in many ways, everyone would talk about how it was their dream to be in New York City Ballet. And I mean, I remember going to shows as a student and almost feeling like this heartache of wanting that so bad. But I think that I always tried to temper that desire and you know, almost didn't let myself even think that was on the horizon for me. I think I just kind of had this approach of like, I am just going to show up every day and kind of take it a day at a time. And, you know, so it did feel like I would say a dream come true, but also a dream that I almost didn't allow myself to fully think about in some ways. And I remember walking out of the office and just kind of shaking and feeling like a surreal moment. And i think my sister ran up to me and kind of had realized what had happened. i think she was the first person I saw and her saying, like, we have to go upstairs to our dorm room and call mom and dad. And so, yeah, I think that that's what we did. We went upstairs to our dorm room and called them.
Speaker: And so during that time, you didn't know for sure that you had a contract. Was there a certain point where that became super clear? Or during this time, were you still auditioning for other companies and kind of like keeping your options open?
Speaker: I think that right before this we had all made audition videos kind of with this, you know, expectation that we all were going to go audition.
Speaker: And i think that after they had this conversation with us We didn't necessarily audition after that. I think it was kind of presented as, you know, this is kind of hopefully what's going to happen. Although I do remember back, i reflect back sometimes on when we were making those audition videos, because at the time,
Speaker: Jonathan Stafford, who is now the director of New York City Ballet, artistic director. He was kind of the capstone. i'm trying to remember the exact title he had, but basically he was in a role where he was helping all of us graduating students you know make their audition materials and get connected to these companies. And in the process of filming my audition video, you know, he was in contact with Peter and kind of that was his job to kind of know who, you know, they were looking at And I remember doing this audition video and, you know, I would like run my variation for the filming and,
Speaker: Jonathan Stafford kind of being like, well, I think, you know, that was a good take. Like, you know, I think we can move on and me being like, well, you know, I really want to fix this and doing my variation many times over and it kind of makes me laugh thinking back i'm sure he was watching this kind of knowing that you know i was kind of spinning my wheels a little bit but that was kind of a funny memory i think that but in retrospect so once you joined the company what were some of the biggest adjustments that you found from being a student to being a professional
Speaker: I think that, you know, I was talking with someone about this the other day, if I could use like an analogy, i think as a student, it almost feels like you're taking driving lessons and throughout this process, you're like learning.
Speaker: different skills and ways to navigate yourself on the road. But you always have a person in the passenger seat kind of keeping you on course.
Speaker: And I think when i joined the company, you know, all of the again, kind of like when I went to SAB, all of the hard work and time and learning so many new ballets. All of that was very much something i was just excited to soak in But it almost felt like, you know, after all these lessons, someone had dropped you in an unfamiliar city and handed you your license and said like, okay, good luck out there.
Speaker: So there was just a lot of newness to navigate. And suddenly, not only were you in this unfamiliar environment trying to like navigate being a professional, but you also no longer had anyone in the passenger seat kind of keeping you on course and giving you reassurance when you maybe didn't know what turn to take.
Speaker: And i think that was something that was an adjustment for sure. Just being in a new environment, but also suddenly realizing like, wow, I'm in the driver's seat and it's up to me to maintain like a sense of direction and to kind of course correct and be observant and just aware of how to like keep myself safe.
Speaker: moving forward in a good way. what was the first ballet you ever performed with the company? My first ballet that i performed with New york City Ballet was Peter Martin Swan Lake. And i was one of the swans, of course, and also I think did kind of this court dance in the black swan ballroom scene.
Speaker: I mean, it definitely felt like my dream was becoming realized. I think every little girl, you know, when they're growing up Swan Lake, you know, the music, the story, the choreography, it really is in a way what many people associate with ballet. And so it was very special to start with that one. And i think particularly the music kind of in the final act, you know, something about that. I remember being on stage and it just hitting me like this is a dream being realized and just thinking about how many hours of dedication had gone into getting to that moment. And, you know, not only myself, but also my parents and all that they had sacrificed to support me and, you know, all my teachers and, you know, my sister supporting me throughout all this, you know, us being kind of on this journey together. And I definitely felt just a lot of gratitude for kind of everything that it took to get to that point. Yeah.
Speaker: That fourth act, Swan Corps, is so powerful too when you're in the corps de ballet. I remember being tears, like coming to my eyes, dancing that role and being surrounded by everyone and all like the, like the wind blowing by you almost everyone like running and the bourées and just like everything, the arms and all of it just like such a full sensory experience and really does feel very emotional.
Speaker: ah Completely. i think that like you, you mentioned being a amongst the core, you almost feel like you're this puzzle piece in this bigger puzzle and you can't see what's painted on the other puzzle pieces, but you're trying to present something beautiful and you know that everyone else is trying to do the same. And so there's like this awareness that, you know, even though you can't see this complete picture, it's like you're part of something that's very overwhelming in a way. And it's very meaningful to feel that. And I think, you know, starting off with a ballet like that,
Speaker: That hit me really hard. Yeah. Is there a ballet you never get tired of performing? Oh my goodness. i can think of so many. i mean, if I were to narrow it down, I mean, i always think of this ballet Donizetti variations that we do. It's a balancing ballet. And to me, it's just pure joy of dance. The music is so joyous. It's such a challenge physically like you are just dancing your fullest in so many ways I could just dance that ballet every day it's satisfying and exciting and it just feels like such an accomplishment when you are part of it I think also concerto barroco such a special one the music again being part of a core like that, it's just very fulfilling. I also got the chance to perform this ballet, tombbo de Couperin, in our winter season this past year. And it's one of those ballets that doesn't come around so often. this is also a Balanchine ballet.
Speaker: And as a student at the school, I remember watching it you know, from the fourth ring at the theater and this ballet, it's just eight core couples and they kind of move in these kaleidoscopic patterns. And they're on stage for, i think about 20 minutes straight, just dancing to the most like gloriously beautiful music. And it was always one that i thought like,
Speaker: that I thought was so special, but because it didn't come around very often and it was such a small cast, I always thought like, know what, that's just going to be one I have to appreciate from the outside.
Speaker: By some stroke of luck, you know, this past season, I got to be a part of it. And it was just so again like a a little mini dream realized getting to be a part of that.
Speaker: I think to throw in a bonus one, I would have to say Nutcracker, even though we've done a million shows of it. I think particularly, i think of the snow scene and just how magical that is. And, you know, being part of people's holiday traditions and memories, I think is so special.
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Speaker: you have other dream roles that you want to perform? That's a good question. I mean, i truly feel like I've gotten to perform and so many ballets that I could never have dreamed of being a part of.
Speaker: i really have an appreciation for some of the little more understated ballets. Like there's a Balanchine Pa called Sonatine. think that but First off, the music is very beautiful. And, you know, I've always really loved partnering and, you know, pas de deux work. And I think something about the movement quality that ballet requires, I think it would feel kind of like home in a way that I could kind of be myself or, you know, a version of myself.
Speaker: And that I think Mozartiana, I've always loved watching that. one as well. I think that's just a special one. You know, we were just performing Jewels this past week with New York City Ballet and i was watching Emeralds from the Wings before I was getting ready to go on for Rubies. And I was it just watching the two Emeralds principles and thinking like, gosh, in some dream world, wouldn't it be fun
Speaker: to do this with Mia, like for Mia to do one or the other, or, you know, the pas de trois is such a lovely part too. Like just to do something fun with your sibling like that would be really cool.
Speaker: Yeah. Like a gala or something you could do together. Back in our parents' living room, like when we were five-year-olds.
Speaker: Yeah. How would you say your relationship with ballet has evolved since you first joined the company to now? I think that, you know, in some ways when I was a student and early on with a company, i you know, would always kind of show up with this strong desire to better myself, but almost in a way where i felt like I was bettering myself to fit into a idealized,
Speaker: version of myself as a ballet dancer. And i think in some ways that's shifted where i almost see showing up every day as not what I'm going to change about myself to be the best version of myself, but how this pursuit of being a ballet dancer is shaping me in to the best version of myself.
Speaker: Reflecting on my years that in the company, you know, the more you do hard things, the easier hard things become. and I think, you know, ballet is such a wonderful pursuit, but it also brings up so many challenges and times self doubt. And i think that i feel very much that ballet has become like a force of empowerment for myself.
Speaker: The hard things don't get easier, but you get stronger through them. And I think that kind of sitting back and appreciating that, appreciating the ups and downs that come with this job and this path and journey, I think that that's something that has really brought me a lot of comfort and joy in the past few years. And not that I've perfected this by any means because I still have self-doubt all the time, but just kind of appreciating what both the good and the bad does for me as a person.
Speaker: so what do you do when you have a performance or a rehearsal or a class where you just feel like you didn't live up to your own expectations of yourself? What's your kind of process through that? Well, I definitely think that perfectionism was something that I've had to really learn to manage as a dancer, you know, from the time I was little and still to this day. Something that I really try to keep in mind is, you know, at the end of the day, i don't want my entire sense of self-worth. to be tied to how high I jumped or how well i executed a pirouette. Something I've like discovered for myself and continue to try to work on is like defining to myself what it means to be ambitious and what excellence means to me because you want to be ambitious, but you want
Speaker: ambition to be able to coexist with your own happiness. And so I think that kind of expanding my definition of ambition to kind of encompass so much more than just how I'm executing steps.
Speaker: on stage or in, you know, the studio, you know, has been important for me. And as much as I want to be an excellent dancer, i also want to be an exceptional colleague and an exceptional friend and an exceptional appreciator of all that I'm experiencing through this career.
Speaker: And in kind of expanding that definition, you almost expand what your ambition can look like because you're not limiting it to just this one thing of how well am I performing XYZ?
Speaker: But in many ways, you're broadening that to include so many different facets of how you show up every day In a lot of ways, that kind of takes the pressure off too of being perfect. You're never going to be perfect. And that's why you keep showing up in the studio every day.
Speaker: are there strengths that you feel like you've developed as a more experienced artist that you feel like you didn't have when you first joined the company? I mean, everything you just talked about is so huge. Is there anything else you would mention?
Speaker: No, what I would say is a sense of humor. i think that humor and curiosity are just the most priceless tools you can have in your toolbox.
Speaker: And, you know, that saying like, take the work seriously, but don't take yourself too seriously. i think that is hugely important for dancers.
Speaker: Having kind of a sense of levity around your imperfections or your weaknesses, it kind of frees you up to use those as motivation rather than something to feel bad about. And I think that This was something that my teacher, Susie Pilar at SAB, I think really helped me discover because she was always using kind of these funny analogies and visuals and kind of reminding us, like, I think, you know, she would sometimes say ballet is like trying to shape steel without a flame. And, you know, in many ways you do have to stand back and say,
Speaker: What you're doing as a dancer is really, really hard. And, you know, you have to kind of put some perspective on it and, you know, have lightness approach the challenges with, I think, a sense of lightness.
Speaker: How do you stay motivated through all the different seasons of your career or in a really busy part of the season? What do you do to make sure that you can still stay present and excited?
Speaker: Yeah. I mean, I think to go back to, you know, this conversation about imperfection or your own kind of personal goals and challenges, that's something that's so wonderful about ballet you're never going to say, oh, I've checked off everything on my to-do list and now I'm just kind of coasting. You know, there are always little things to think about. And I think that just always kind of having those goals in mind for myself and never framing it as, oh, this is something I need to fix, but this is something i get to explore. And like, how can I think of, you know, if something's not working,
Speaker: really just finding some joy in problem solving and even, you know, learning from others, being observant of others around you. i think one of my favorite things about being a dancer is Sometimes I'll be in company class and I'll be watching other groups go across the floor and just be like, wow, that was amazing. And I even will hear my colleagues kind of say like, wow, like out loud and, you know, just there's so much inspiration to be pulled from.
Speaker: everything around you. And i think that, you know, not only the dancers around you that you admire both as dancers and people, but, you know, just always maintaining an awareness of, you know, the musicians around you and the excellence that they're putting on the table and, you know, just everything outside of yourself. that is contributing to your experience of this ballet journey because there really is just endless inspiration to grab onto.
Speaker: okay last question I have for you. If you had to give aspiring professional dancers who are pursuing their career, one piece of advice, what would you tell them? I think that I would say happiness is the ultimate success. Going back to this talk about, you know, the ups and downs that the ballet journey presents through all of that. If you're able to maintain a sense of joy in moving your body to wonderful music, and connecting with people around you and kind of appreciating not only your experience, but the piece of the puzzle that you are I think that that just frees you up.
Speaker: to really experience the joy of dance to the fullest. And i think back to myself when I was 9, 10, 15, 16, you know, any step of the way, really. And I would want, you know, any aspiring ballet student or any student to know that just by walking in the studio every day,
Speaker: you're kind of being brave and you're putting yourself out there and to give yourself credit for that, I think is so important. And, you know, not only does that apply to students, but you know, if you're in an adult ballet class and you're just starting to dance for the first time, you know, no matter who what your experience in ballet is, to give yourself credit for putting yourself out there and to always remember that happiness is the ultimate success.
Speaker: Amazing. This has been so inspiring, Gabriella. I've loved hearing all that your story and about all of your experience. If anybody listening wants to learn more about you, where can we find you? Well, I do have an Instagram. I'm a little social media shy, so I can't claim that there's anything life changing on there. But you can find me at Gabriella.Dominey on Instagram.
Speaker: Perfect. Thank you so much. Thanks so much, Caitlin. This was so much fun. Thank you for tuning into the Brainy Ballerina podcast. If you found this episode insightful, entertaining, or maybe a bit of both, I would so appreciate you taking a moment to leave a rating and hit subscribe.
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Speaker: I'll be back with a new episode next week. In the meantime, be sure to follow along on Instagram at The Brainy Ballerina for your daily dose of dance career guidance.
