[00:00:00] Hello, everybody. I felt like talking to you today. So here I am.

I've been having a really hard time getting back to this podcast. I miss it. And I want to come back. But there are so many things blocking me. So. I thought maybe that's what I should talk about. And we're going to get a little bit meta on the podcast [00:01:00] today and talk about the podcast itself. If you've been following me for a while. Thank you for still being here.

It's been a few years since we started this thing and there have been lots of ups and downs and lots of breaks. And if you're still here, you're my favorite.

I want to go back to the roots of why I started this thing in the first place. And then talk about why it's been so hard to keep going, because I think the things I'm facing. Are things we all face as creators as humans. As livers of life. I started this podcast for fun. It was a challenge. I don't think I would have done it without a little nudge from a Facebook group to start a podcast. I did it as a way to face my fears and just talk about the things I care about.

It was for me, it was for fun. I didn't really expect it to grow or be [00:02:00] anything then. Just for fun. Um, And. I want to listen to the way I started this podcast because I haven't listened to it in a while. And I think it's going to be a good reminder. So the audio quality is probably not going to be great because I'm just playing this from my phone. Um, I can't find the original recording, but hopefully you'll be able to understand this.

I was raised in a very perfectionistic religion by two perfectionistic parents.

And as a result of this, I've always taken the business of life. Very seriously. Probably definitely too seriously. The problem with perfectionism is that it doesn't let you be present in your all life or true to yourself. It's all about living up to the expectations of others. Perfectionism is an analyzer, a comparer. It doesn't let you sit within an experience because you're always observing it. So this podcast. Is about. [00:03:00] Letting go of that. Letting go of the perfectionism letting go of the hustle, the guilt, the never enoughness it's about showing up messy. It's about authenticity.

It's about finding magic in the present moment. As about connecting with those you love while also holding space for yourself. It's about living wholeheartedly. And loving yourself in your imperfection. So. It's a quote. My favorite cartoon teacher, Mrs. Frizzle, Ms. Frizzle, not sure which one it is.

I'm going to look it up. After I finished recording this. But she says, get ready to take chances. Make mistakes and get messy. It's time to be your bad self.

Yeah, well, It turns out that's exactly what I'm still struggling with. I, I need to let go of perfectionism still, because that's what has gotten in the way of this podcast. And I think that's probably the life lesson I'm going to keep returning to over and over again. I do, I am doing this podcast because I need to say the things that I need to [00:04:00] hear. And today, once again, I need to hear. It's okay to just be it's okay.

To be messy. It's okay. To make mistakes. Um, Okay. And I'm going to continue to be messy and make mistakes for the rest of my life. So having this expectation of. Perfectionism. It's not doing me. It's not doing me favors. Um, With this podcast. I started out messy as you heard. It was great. And as it started growing. I started to feel this pressure to show up a certain way. To get video recordings of myself, to manage an email list, to maintain a website, to monetize the podcast and the pressure of all of that.

Along with just the stuff that was happening in my regular life became really. Really overwhelming. And the podcast stopped feeling fun because the pressure, there was so much pressure to do it. The right way. I let it fall by the wayside [00:05:00] and, um, and I've really missed i

That Kimber Girl | Episode 40