Aging is one of the few things we all have in common, yet most of us spend our lives trying to resist it. In this episode, we explore how fear of time can quietly shape our mental health — from anxiety and identity loss to the grief that comes with watching others grow older around us.



I talk about the psychology behind time anxiety, how aging fears show up differently for men and women, and what really happens when we start losing the people who once made us feel timeless. You’ll also hear about how meaning, connection, and perspective can turn that fear into growth.



This isn’t about pretending not to age — it’s about learning how to do it with peace, purpose, and compassion.



If this episode resonated, share it with someone who’s learning to grow through time, not against it.











Referenced in This Episode:

American Psychological Association (2023): The Psychology of Time Anxiety



CDC (2023): National Vital Statistics Report on Suicide Rates by Age Group



National Institute of Mental Health (2022): Identity Loss and Midlife Mental Health



Becca Levy (Yale University, 2002–2020): Mind Over Matter: The Science of Age Beliefs



The Gerontologist (2019): Age Anxiety and Emotional Well-Being in Older Adults



Frontiers in Psychology (2020): Age Anxiety and Depressive Symptoms in Later Life



Greenberg, Pyszczynski, & Solomon (1986): Terror Management Theory: The Cultural Buffer Hypothesis



Hayes et al. (2012): Psychological Flexibility and Acceptance Theory



Harvard Study of Adult Development (2019): What Makes a Good Life?

Time Anxiety & Fear of Aging

In this special listener-requested episode of Clear Minds In Color, mental-health coach Robert Saint Michael explores the psychology behind homosociality — the way men form identity and belonging through the approval of other men — and how this behavior shapes emotional connection, power, and intimacy.



Originally inspired by a viral clip from beauty influencer Shamsi Rashid (@shamsiiito), this conversation takes a deeper look at how social dominance theory, gender roles, and cultural conditioning influence the way men navigate vulnerability and validation.



We unpack what these theories get right — and what they miss — about modern masculinity.

From the “protector” role in heterosexual relationships to the myth that male closeness threatens sexuality, this episode challenges stereotypes and explores how healthy brotherhood can be a space for care, empathy, and identity-building.



Key themes:



 * The difference between homosociality and homosexuality

 * How social dominance theory shapes belonging and approval

 * The emotional cost of the “protector” role in relationships

 * Gender role conflict and the struggle to be seen

 * New research showing men are building vulnerability into masculinity





Hosted by: Robert Saint Michael

Presented by: Clear Minds In Color — evidence-based strategies for emotional wellness and modern mental health.

Learn more: clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/]







Referenced in This Episode



 * Shamsi Rashid — Instagram: @shamsiiito [https://www.instagram.com/shamsiiito]

 * Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick (1985) – Between Men: English Literature and Male Homosocial Desire

 * Gayle Rubin (1975) – The Traffic in Women: Notes on the Political Economy of Sex

 * Sidanius & Pratto (1999) – Social Dominance: An Intergroup Theory of Social Hierarchy and Oppression

 * Michael Flood (2008) – Men, Sex, and Homosociality: How Bonds Between Men Shape Their Sexual Relations with Women

 * Jeff Hearn (2012) – Men, Masculinities and Gender Relations

 * Mahalik, Burns, & Syzdek (2007) – Masculinity and Perceived Normative Health Behaviors in Men

 * Frederick, Fessler, & Haselton (2016) – Do Men Suppress Vulnerability in Romantic Relationships?

 * O’Neil, Good, & Holmes (1995) – Gender Role Conflict Theory

 * Simon & Nath (2004) – Gender and Emotion in the United States

 * Levant, Wimer, & Williams (2011) – Masculinity Constructs and Relationship Quality in Men

 * Eric Anderson (2009) – Inclusive Masculinity: The Changing Nature of Masculinities

 * bell hooks (2004) – The Will to Change: Men, Masculinity, and Love

 * Raewyn Connell (2015) – Masculinities (2nd Ed.)

 * Simon Baron-Cohen (2011) – The Science of Evil: On Empathy and the Origins of Cruelty

 * Christopher Boehm (1999) – Hierarchy in the Forest: The Evolution of Egalitarian Behavior





Why Men Seek Male Approval

In this episode of Clear Minds In Color, we explore what it really means to grow — beyond birthdays, paychecks, or appearances.



Maturity isn’t a destination. It’s a series of psychological milestones that reshape how we think, respond, and contribute. Together, we unpack the three key shifts that move us from survival to purpose: taking responsibility instead of assigning blame, learning emotional literacy, and building a life grounded in contribution rather than ego.



Drawing from research in psychology and neuroscience, we challenge the myth that age equals growth — and reflect on how accountability, empathy, and purpose create the foundation for true adulthood.



We close with a preview of next week’s topic, Fear of Aging, where we’ll explore how the same insecurities that keep us from growing also make us afraid of time — and how redefining maturity can free us from that fear.



Hosted by: Robert Saint Michael | Mental Health Coach

Presented by: Clear Minds In Color — evidence-based mental-health strategies and public-health insights that promote emotional clarity and resilience.

Learn more: clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/]









Referenced In this Episode:



 * American Psychological Association (2022) – Emotional Regulation and Maturity in Adulthood [https://www.apa.org/news/press/releases/2022/03/emotional-maturity] — research linking accountability and empathy with adult psychological health.

 * Harvard Study of Adult Development (2019) – What Makes a Good Life? Lessons from the Longest Study on Happiness [https://news.harvard.edu/gazette/story/2017/04/over-nearly-80-years-harvard-study-has-been-showing-how-to-live-a-healthy-and-happy-life/] — findings on life satisfaction and responsibility as key predictors of well-being.

 * National Institute of Mental Health (2021) – Brain Maturation Continues into Adulthood [https://www.nimh.nih.gov/news/science-news/2021/brain-development-continues-into-20s] — neuroscience showing emotional regulation develops beyond adolescence.

 * Viktor Frankl (1946) – Man’s Search for Meaning [https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/533415/mans-search-for-meaning-by-viktor-e-frankl/] — foundational work on purpose, contribution, and human resilience.

 * Clear Minds In Color – clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/] — mental-health resources and strategies for modern growth.



How Boys Become Men

In this episode of Clear Minds In Color, we dive into the psychology of attachment and autonomy in relationships.



When we move in with someone, it’s easy to slip into routines that start to feel like marriage — without realizing how those unspoken expectations affect our communication, individuality, and emotional balance.



Through real examples, trauma-informed insight, and the latest relationship research, we’ll explore how codependency develops, how we can communicate without shutting each other down, and why space isn’t distance — it’s the oxygen that keeps love alive.



This conversation helps us understand the difference between closeness and control, teaches us how to set healthy emotional boundaries, and reminds us that love grows best when both people stay whole.



Hosted by: Robert Saint Michael, NLP | Mental Health Coach

Presented by: Clear Minds In Color — providing evidence-based mental-health strategies and public-health interventions that promote healthy mental hygiene and resilient communities.

Learn more: clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/]







Referenced in This Episode



 * Journal of Marriage and Family (2023) – University of Denver Center for Marital and Family Studies: Cohabitation and Relationship Inertia [https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/journal/17413737] — findings on communication and emotional disengagement in early cohabitation.

 * Amir Levine & Rachel Heller – Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love [https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/307264/attached-by-amir-levine-md-and-rachel-sf-heller-ma/] — foundational work on attachment styles and relationship anxiety.

 * Harvard Business Review (2022) – The Hidden Forms of Power in the Workplace [https://hbr.org/2022/09/the-hidden-forms-of-power-in-the-workplace] — research on emotional leverage and control dynamics.

 * APA Division 43: Society for Couple and Family Psychology – Codependency and Relationship Dynamics [https://www.apadivisions.org/division-43/resources/newsletters/2021/04/codependency] — defining patterns of dependence and autonomy in romantic relationships.

 * Clear Minds In Color – clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/] — evidence-based tools for communication, self-awareness, and emotional regulation.





Sharing A Space In Love

In this final installment of The Diddy Case series, we explores how the same patterns of power, silence, and complicity that shape public scandals also show up in our homes, workplaces, and communities.



Drawing from trauma-informed care and public-health psychology, this episode reveals how control and coercion often hide behind care, charisma, and loyalty—and how recognizing those behaviors is the first step toward healing.

Through reflection and real-world strategies, Robert offers tools for accountability rooted in empathy and integrity, helping listeners build safety and emotional resilience in their everyday lives.



Episode highlights:



 * How subtle power dynamics impact mental health and relationships.

 * Why culture struggles to separate art from accountability.

 * Trauma-informed strategies for empathy, communication, and repair.

 * Reflection prompts to help you practice everyday courage.





Hosted by: Robert Saint Michael, NLP | Mental Health Coach

Presented by: Clear Minds In Color — evidence-based mental-health strategies and public-health interventions that promote healthy mental hygiene and resilient communities.

Learn more: clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/]







Referenced in this Episode



 * Latané, B. & Darley, J. – The Bystander Effect: Diffusion of Responsibility and Social Influence [https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1968-08586-001], Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (1968).

 * Harvard Business Review – The Hidden Forms of Workplace Power [https://hbr.org/2022/09/the-hidden-forms-of-power-in-the-workplace] — research on subtle coercion and emotional leverage in organizational structures.

 * United Nations Human Rights Council – Conflict-Related Sexual Violence Annual Report [https://www.un.org/sexualviolenceinconflict/annual-report/] — documentation of power, control, and silence in global systems of harm.

 * McCutcheon, L. E. et al. (2002) – A Cognitive Profile of Individuals Who Tend to Worship Celebrities [https://doi.org/10.2466/pr0.2002.91.1.29], Psychological Reports.

 * APA Division 56 (Trauma Psychology) – Trauma-Informed Approaches to Healing and Accountability [https://www.apatraumadivision.org/trauma-informed-practice] — best practices for trauma recovery and cultural prevention.

 * Clear Minds In Color – clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/] — evidence-based resources for mental wellness and community health.





The Diddy Case Blind Spot (Part 3)

In this second episode of The Diddy Case series, Robert Saint Michael, host of Clear Minds In Color, examines the deep historical roots of sexual violence and power.



From ancient Greek and Roman civilizations—where sexual domination was used to humiliate and control—to the trans-Atlantic slave trade and modern-day systems of exploitation, this episode reveals how the misuse of power has shaped human history. This session connects these past patterns to the present, highlighting how culture, celebrity, and nostalgia still influence who we choose to believe and how easily we excuse harm.



Through a trauma-informed and public-health lens, Power, History, and Sexual Violence challenges listeners to recognize the moral blind spots that allow violence to continue and to question what we normalize today that future generations may one day call unacceptable.



Hosted by: Robert Saint Michael, NLP | Mental Health Coach

Presented by: Clear Minds In Color — an organization providing evidence-based mental health strategies and public health interventions that promote healthy mental hygiene and resilient communities.

Learn more: clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/]





Referenced in this Episode:



 * Thomas Hubbard – Homosexuality in Greece and Rome: A Sourcebook of Basic Documents [https://www.hup.harvard.edu/books/9780674012031] — Harvard University Press.

 * David Halperin – One Hundred Years of Homosexuality and Other Essays on Greek Love [https://press.princeton.edu/books/paperback/9780691007203/one-hundred-years-of-homosexuality] — Princeton University Press.

 * Deborah Gray White – Ar’n’t I a Woman?: Female Slaves in the Plantation South [https://uncpress.org/book/9781469601040/arnt-i-a-woman/] — University of North Carolina Press.

 * Antoinette Burton – Burdens of History: British Feminists, Indian Women, and Imperial Culture, 1865–1915 [https://uncpress.org/book/9780807846937/burdens-of-history/] — University of North Carolina Press.

 * United Nations Human Rights Council – Conflict-Related Sexual Violence Annual Report [https://www.un.org/sexualviolenceinconflict/annual-report/] — documentation of sexual violence in conflict zones including Bosnia, Rwanda, and the DRC.

 * McCutcheon, L. E. et al. (2002) – A Cognitive Profile of Individuals Who Tend to Worship Celebrities [https://doi.org/10.2466/pr0.2002.91.1.29] — Psychological Reports, research on cognitive dissonance and celebrity worship.

 * Clear Minds In Color – clearmindsincolor.com [https://clearmindsincolor.com/] — evidence-based mental health and public health resources promoting healthy mental hygiene and community resilience.





The Diddy Case Blind Spot (Part 2)

In this first episode of The Diddy Case Blind Spot series, Robert Saint Michael unpacks the social ripple effects of Sean “Diddy” Combs’ 2025 sentencing — and what it reveals about power, privilege, and accountability in cases of sexual violence.



From the charges that didn’t stick to the survivors’ fear of not being believed, this episode explores how society protects power and silences truth. Through a trauma-informed, public-health lens, Robert examines why justice often feels incomplete and how communities can create safer spaces for healing and belief.



👉 Listen now to learn how fame, money, and culture shape justice — and what it will take for society to truly believe survivors.



💡 Hosted by Robert Saint Michael, NLP | Mental Health Coach

🔗 Visit: robertsaintmichael.com [https://robertsaintmichael.com/] — your hub for researched, evidence-based mental and public health resources.

The Diddy Case Blind Spot (Part 1)

In this episode of The Group Sessions, Robert Saint Michael explores the unique experience of being the middle child. From Alfred Adler’s early psychology of birth order to the lived reality of feeling overlooked or “stuck in the middle,” Robert unpacks how these family dynamics shape identity, self-worth, and relationships. With a trauma-informed lens, he shares practical tools for healing the “middle child wound,” reframing invisibility into resilience, and reclaiming the strengths that come with adaptability and empathy.



Credentials + Links:

Robert Saint Michael, NLP | Mental Health Coach

Visit robertsaintmichael.com [https://robertsaintmichael.com/] — your hub for researched and evidence-based public health information, resources, and coaching services.



If this episode spoke to you, please like, subscribe, and share it with someone in your life who might need the encouragement. And don’t forget to comment with your own middle child stories—I’d love to hear how your family position shaped who you are today.



Referenced in this episode:



 * Adler, A. (1927/1992). Understanding Human Nature.

 * Sulloway, F. J. (1996). Born to Rebel: Birth Order, Family Dynamics, and Creative Lives.

 * Eckstein, D., & Kaufman, J. A. (2012). The Role of Birth Order in Personality: An Enduring Myth or an Empirical Reality? Journal of Individual Psychology.

 * Trauma-informed resources on family dynamics and self-worth (American Psychological Association).

 * robertsaintmichael.com — evidence-based mental health + public health resources.



The Middle Child Mind

In this episode of The Group Sessions, Robert Saint Michael explores how leaning into discomfort can literally rewire your brain for resilience. Research shows that the anterior midcingulate cortex—the part of the brain that activates when we face challenges—grows stronger when we push through effort. That growth isn’t just science; it’s survival.



Robert breaks down how safe, intentional challenges can improve mental health, reduce stress, and support trauma recovery. With practical coaching tips and real-life examples, you’ll learn how to turn everyday struggles into opportunities for growth.



✨ Comment below: What’s one small challenge you can take on today—physically, mentally, or emotionally?



Robert also shares how his mental health coaching can support you in building resilience and healing, and invites you to visit robertsaintmichael.com [https://robertsaintmichael.com/] — a hub for researched and evidence-based public health information.



If this episode resonates with you, please like, subscribe, and share it with someone who needs the encouragement.

Challenges Help You Heal

In honor of Bisexual Visibility Week, Robert Saint Michael opens up about being a bisexual Black man and creating Bi+ Black Men as a public health intervention for those who often feel unseen. Through a powerful story shared by “Alice,” a woman healing from deep Southern religious indoctrination while in a same-sex partnership, Robert unpacks the legacy of religious trauma, the reality of spiritual abuse, and the history of Christianity’s harms alongside its potential for peace. With compassion and honesty, he offers practical tools for countering intrusive thoughts and reframing God as a force of love, not fear.





Hosted by Robert Saint Michael, NLP | Mental Health Coach

Visit robertsaintmichael.com [https://robertsaintmichael.com/] — your hub for researched and evidence-based public health information, articles, and coaching services.



If this episode resonated with you, please like, comment, subscribe, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. And if you’re seeking guidance on your own journey, reach out and explore working with me as your mental health coach.







Referenced in this episode:



 * GLAAD – Bisexual Visibility Week resources

 * Winell, M. (2011). Leaving the Fold: A Guide for Former Fundamentalists and Others Leaving Their Religion

 * Research on Religious Trauma Syndrome (Winell)

 * Pew Research Center – Studies on religion, LGBTQ+, and mental health

 * Bi+ Black Men (Community + Podcast)



Religious Trauma

Breakthrough mental health sessions for everyday people. Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/robertsaintmichael/support