Conversation with Scott

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Scott: Hello and welcome to the Love and Compassion podcast with Gissele. We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives and our world.

Gissele: Don’t forget to like and subscribe for more amazing content. This year we’re creating an inspiring documentary called Courage to Love, the Power of Compassion, which explores the extraordinary stories of those who have chosen to do the unthinkable. Love and forgive those who have caused them deep harm.

Through their journeys, we will uncover the profound impact of forgiveness, not only to those offering it, but also those receiving it. we’ll hear from experts who will explore whether love and reconciliation are part of our human nature and how we can bridge divides with those we disagree with.

We are launching a fundraising campaign in March, offering incredible perks to our supporters. If you’re interested in our documentary, know somebody whose story should be featured, or would like to contribute financially, stay tuned. Speaking of divided, [00:01:00] today’s topic is about how to love others during divided times. Our guest today is Scott Stabile. He is a Breathwork Facilitator.

 and author of the acclaimed motivational memoir, Big Love, The Undeniable Joy of Following Your Heart, the short prose collection, Enough As You Are, and the inspirational art book, Just Love.

A passionate love advocate, Scott is a compassionate and soulful storyteller, unafraid to dive deep into the human experience. Through his books, talks, personal empowerment workshops, and sub stack newsletter, Scott invites us to choose love even in the darkest times. to fully embrace our messy, beautiful selves.

He’s not just a teacher. He’s a fellow traveler navigating the hard, sacred work of being human. Please join me in welcoming Scott. Hi, Scott.

Scott: Hi [00:02:00] Gissele.

Gissele: I’m so

excited to have this chat, it feels like if we’re just living in such a divided world, it feels like we’re almost living in two separate worlds of people that are wanting to love and have compassion.

And then this other group that is maybe struggling with that. And it feels like we’re more divided than ever. I was wondering if you could start by telling the audience how you got into the work of love.

Scott: How did

I get into the work of love? I mean, I would say the most Honest answer is I was in a cult in the in the Bay Area in the 90s.

In my early 20s, I got involved with a spiritual teacher and a spiritual community. And the, you know, the teachings from my former guru were, you know, love, unconditional love, unconditional friendship. It didn’t end up turning out that [00:03:00] way when, I mean, it ended in a very dark way, which I won’t go into right now.

But when I reflect back on those times, I was really consumed with enlightenment in the possibility of becoming enlightened. That’s what I cared about the most. And what I saw as the path to enlightenment was love. and compassion and forgiveness and all of these beautiful energies that we know when we’re engaging with those energies we feel so much better.

And what I came to discover when I decided that I didn’t want to be a part of this community anymore and that when I was going to let go of chasing enlightenment, when I realized it’s not something that I could achieve, that’s not how enlightenment works. That I still felt called to be as loving as possible and as compassionate as possible.

Nothing, nothing changed about me other than my drive to become enlightened, which only created for me a lot of suffering and misery, [00:04:00] honestly. And when I could let go of that, I was abl

Ep.63- Choosing Love in a Time of Great Division with Scott Stabile

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Gissele: Hello and welcome to the love and compassion podcast with Gissele.

We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives and our worlds. Don’t forget to like, and subscribe for more amazing content. we’re doing an amazing documentary called the courage to love. Focusing on sharing stories of those who have chosen to do the unthinkable, loving and forgiving those who are the most hurtful through their stories, we will find out what the impact of forgiving and caring for our opponents is for those doing the forgiving.

And for those who were forgiven, we’ll also hear from experts about whether it is in our nature to love and to come together with those with whom we disagree. We’ll be doing fundraising in March with lots of amazing perks. If you’re interested in the documentary, you want to nominate someone or support us financially,

Please look out for the information coming out in March. On today’s podcast, we’ll be talking about [00:01:00] punishment free parenting. Our guest today is Rebecca Wolf. She is author of the book, The Gift of a Punishment Free Childhood. She is a parenting mentor, educator, and mother. She supports parents through mentoring and workshops and navigating their parenting journeys.

Using punishment free practices, however, her most important work was raising her own children without punishment. Her extensive personal experiences, contribute to her ability to guide others on their parenting journeys. Rebecca is a certified parenting educator for the redirecting children’s behavior program.

and has conducted extensive research on how punishment impacts children’s behavior. Rebecca has a Ph. D. from the University of Northern Colorado in education and has been a lifelong teacher and learner. Please join me in welcoming Rebecca. Hi, Rebecca. [00:02:00] Hello.

Rebecca: Thank you,

Gissele: Giselle. As I was saying to you before, I love your book.

Absolutely love it. I wish I had found this book earlier in my parenting experience. Because I feel like my husband and I really had to struggle to learn by making lots of mistakes with our kids.

So I wish we had found your book. And so I was strongly encouraging my listeners, especially who are starting out in the parenting journey, or even if they have kids today, because you talk about teens to get it. Can you tell the audience a little bit about how you decided to go punishment free?

Rebecca: Yeah, absolutely. So, as you shared in my biography, I was trained to work for the Redirecting Children’s Behavior Parenting Workshops. And in that work, it, it, There still was punishment included, but it really started to emphasize the idea of redirecting right rather than punishing. Let’s [00:03:00] redirect.

And so I had kind of this solid foundation. And but what I’ll share is that it was really when I started thinking about some of the crises that we’re seeing. In the world now. I live in Colorado. And so the Columbine high school shooting that happened back in 1999 was pretty impactful for me. I spent a lot of time thinking about that, thinking about that family, those parents you know, the parents on both sides, the parents of the shooters, the parents of those who lost their lives that day.

And there are many, many factors that go into a situation like that.

But

Rebecca: it was clear that the reason those two boys walked into that high school was to punish their classmates. And so I’m like, why do we think that that is the solution? And if you think about it, it’s because that’s what most, most children, it’s how they are.

It’s the relationship

Ep.62- The Gift of a Punishment-Free Childhood with Dr. Rebecca Woulfe

Transcript

Gissele: [00:00:00] Hello and welcome to the Love and Compassion podcast with Giselle. We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives and our world.

Don’t forget to like and subscribe for more amazing content. Today we’re going to be talking about the power of intimacy and connection. And our guest today is Lyuba Benablo. And she’s a highly trained sex and relationship coach, passionate about helping men discover what women truly crave for within intimate connections.

Having led countless women only pleasure retreats, Luba has gained a vast understanding of women’s needs to feel deeply fulfilled. And with this, she identified a calling that speaks to her, guiding men towards becoming the most impactful and authentic lovers. They can be Lyuba’s authentic lovers for men program empowers men to explore the depths of intimacy, the specific needs that women struggle [00:01:00] to openly express known for her approachable style and real world insights.

Lyuba practices, everything she teaches.

Embodying the lessons she shares with her clients. Please join me in welcoming Lyuba.

Lyuba: Hi Giselle. How are you? I am, I’m so good. I just, I just had a session with a young couple. Like in their 20s and I, I just turned 41 and you know, I feel like I’m this like an older, wiser woman who is just like teaching them about how to be closer, how to have fun in their relationship.

So my heart is full. I, I love doing what I do.

Gissele: Oh, that is so amazing. And you know, like kudos to them for actually looking to explore that so that they can get that greater intimacy. So that’s amazing.

Where did you get started in

this work? Can you [00:02:00] share?

Lyuba: Yeah, so I, I started, I started when COVID started, so that’s, that’s my starting point.

Okay, okay, nice. And, and, and that was the time when I used to work in software industry. When I moved to United States, my first company was Google. So, I was like out there. Wow. Go on. Yeah. And then I was taking these like a weekend training where we were like really feeling inside looking inside. And there was this like, like a calling that I want to work with people like on intimacy, sexuality.

I want to help people to connect. And that was just like, okay, I have to do it. And I started as COVID started, you know, couldn’t wait longer.

Gissele: Oh, that’s so funny. That’s incredible. Having been a coach for a little while, what do you, what do you think the biggest mistake is that women and men make around intimacy?

Lyuba: [00:03:00] Oh, yeah. The biggest, you know, it’s like no one teaches us. That’s, that’s the first thing to start that in our families, for most of us, it’s not modeled. The intimacy is not modeled. Right. And then schools don’t teach us. And so how are we supposed to know? So we enter relationships that we don’t know how to create intimacy.

I feel like I experienced my first intimacy, like being close with another person when I was 30. So it’s just like, I didn’t have it as a little kid, you know? And I just, I remember I, I cried the whole weekend because it felt so good. And I was so sad that. I haven’t had it in my life, right, that so that I haven’t experienced it earlier in my life that I was missing it and craving it.

Gissele: Yeah, it’s so funny. Absolutely. I mean, I was thinking about my own family in my own family. Like, sex was a no talk. Like, it was [00:04:00] like, you don’t mention that you don’t talk about pleasure. You certainly don’t talk about intimacy. And I would say tha

Ep.61- Creating True Intimacy with Lyuba Venable

Gissele:

Hello, and welcome to the Love and Compassion podcast with Gissele. . We believe that loving compassion have the power to heal our lives and our world. Today, we’ll be talking about dealing with grief. With compassion.

Today’s guest is Dr. Jan Schwartz. Who is the president of forensic fraud research Inc. She is a fellow of the American psychological association. Fellow of the American academy of forensic sciences. And this is a certified Homeland protection professional. With the national Sheriff’s association. Her book last summer with Oscar. He came an international bestseller on amazon.com. Her new book. Authentic intelligence. How do you use your emotional, mental, and spiritual gifts to create the life and world you want is bound to gain the same recognition and accolades. Please join me in welcoming Jan. Hi, Jan.

Jan: Good morning, Gissele. A warm hello to you and to all of your listeners.

Gissele: Thank you. Thank you so much. I just want to start by sharing a little bit about how I sort of ended up finding your story. In particular, I was going through my own journey of my own dog having seizures. And there was a couple of times where my dog, we thought we’re going to lose him. Just because the seizures were really, really bad. And I kind of resigned myself to his, you know, eventual passing. Just because of how bad the seizures had gotten. But then I set the intention for something that would help me not only ease his passing, but actually restore him to the level of wellness that I knew he could get to. But I didn’t know how. And so very interestingly, I didn’t even know how you and I kind of connected, but we started chatting about your book, authentic intelligence. Um, and through conversation, it came out that you had written this other book called last summer with Oscar. And when you look at your credentials, it’s amazing that somebody who is so involved in fraud would end up sort of in this kind of journey that is more spiritual. So wanted to start the podcast by letting the audience know. A little bit about, um, what actually led you to write last summer with Oscar and how did perhaps your perspective shift from focusing on forensic fraud to maybe opening up to there being something else?

Jan: My husband and I returned home from a vacation a holiday. And when we went to pick up the dogs from this wonderful kennel, they said to me, Jan, we’re so sorry, but Oscar didn’t eat. And I was very concerned, wondering why they hadn’t contacted us and these kinds of things.

But rather than focusing on that, I immediately drew my attention to Oscar and his eyes flashed at me with fear when he leaped out [00:03:00] of the kennel and I put them into the car. Needless to say, the next day my husband and I were at the vet and the vet was disturbed by the dramatic weight loss because Oscar was not able to eat.

And my husband is a retired surgeon so he was there examining the x rays and saw that cancer was, had taken over Oscar’s body and came out to tell me with the vet that things Didn’t look good. Well, this was I was devastated. I was just overwhelmed with sorrow and grief. And the immediate thought is.

What can we do to help him? And the vet said, well, he will die because he won’t be able to eat the kind of cancer he has. This is the challenge. They don’t feel like eating and there is great depression with it. So he said there’s chemotherapy, but we [00:04:00] had heard many times from others that had faced a similar diagnosis.

And in this case, it, it the likelihood of it being hemangiosarcoma, which is the worst kind of cancer. One that. A dog can be perfectly healthy one minute and then it just, it’s such a fast spreading cancer, it just becomes a pervasive

Ep.60- Dealing with grief with compassion.  A journey of loss and miracles

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Jessica Campbell: Hello and welcome to the love and compassion with Gissele. We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives and our world. Don’t forget to like, and subscribe for more amazing content today. I have my most beloved sister, Jessica Campbell, talking about weight loss and compassion.

Gissele Taraba: Jessica Campbell started her journey when she was 45 weighing 270 pounds. She’s lost over a hundred pounds and decided to create a YouTube channel, where she could engage in dialogue about weight loss. Weight related disease education and how to achieve weight loss in an affordable way that honors a person’s way of living.

And I would also say compassionately too. And this was really about her journey and figuring out how to live a balanced life. So today we’re going to be talking about weight loss, compassion, maybe Bridgerton and relationships. Please join me in welcoming Jessica Campbell. Hi [00:01:00] Jessica.

Jessica Campbell: Hello Giselle. Thank you so much for having me.

I really appreciate this.

Gissele Taraba: Oh, no worries. Thank you so much for coming on the show. I mean, we’ve been talking a little bit about working together. And I knew that you were the person that I wanted to have a conversation, especially about weight loss and compassion, having gone through your own weight loss journey.

And also, you know, some of my listeners might not know. That you are one of the first people that really taught me about compassion. We were both very young and you would talk to me about how to look at people beyond the good or bad. And how to look at my relationships with, you know, our parents and other people in a very, very kind way.

And so I am forever grateful and thought you would be the perfect. Person for this conversation. Can you tell the listeners a little bit about how your weight loss journey kind of began? You know, like the path to get there? And then maybe some of the most important things you’ve learned from that journey.

Jessica Campbell: Absolutely. So the first thing [00:02:00] was that I was going through a lot of existential maybe questions at the time where I had already had the kids. I was trying to find a place in terms of What, what I could do after because my whole world where my kids my husband at the time but I didn’t feel that I had purpose, but there was an addendum to that.

The addendum was that every day I would get up. I would feel weighted back. In weighted by the weight, weighted by the fact that I couldn’t breathe. And the fact that the, the weight was weighing so heavily upon me that I couldn’t even I couldn’t work. I became, less and less active and engaged in my life.

Now, the precipice to that is the fact that you go into your doctor’s appointment and your doctor says, well, you’re [00:03:00] pre-diabetic, you also have high blood pressure. Mm-Hmm, . And and they weigh you obviously. And that’s, you know that the observable weight was 270 pounds. Now that I did not act.

Right away, so I think I was actually a little bit heavier, but I mean, it’s neither here nor there the weight is wasn’t what was the issue was the fact that all my,health was going. Going on a downhill spiral, so I decided to take care of my health and this is actually pre. My separation, my divorce, It was, I think that the, the problem with any journey is that, you know, everyone has to, there’s the old you, or there’s the you that’s existing at that time and the, and the vision you [00:04:00] are not necessarily aligned at that time. They’re just 2 different ideas. And because there are two different ideas that you have to buy into it

Ep.59- Transforming our bodies with compassion, a weight loss journey with Jessica Campbell

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Gissele: [00:00:00]

 Hello and welcome to the love and compassion podcast with Giselle. We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives in our world. Don’t forget to like subscribe for more amazing content today. We’ll be talking about how mindfulness can actually positively impact a culture.

I’ll be speaking to Ashley Williams voted top 40 under 40 by styled weekly enrichments, magazines, daring women of 2018. Ashley is a certified yoga specialist. A creator of mindfulness plus movement, RVA implementing therapeutic interventions, programs and professional development training that combines social emotional learning, mindfulness and movement.

She’s also founder of bare soul yoga and wellness in Richmond, Virginia, intentionally created to make yoga and wellness accessible to the black community, but welcomes all communities. Please join me in welcoming [00:01:00] Ashley. Hi, Ashley. Hi

Ashley: Giselle. How are you? I am well. it’s, it’s, So beautiful outside.

I’ve been like bird watching as I like move from one place to the next and like all the different environments So I’m excited to like sit down in this moment and just take in taking this conversation and the house that I’m sitting in.

Gissele: Beautiful, beautiful.

And I think that goes to show like about the embodiment. So you not only teach the stuff you live it, right? Can you tell the audience a little bit about how it is that you got started in this work?

Ashley: Yeah. So my mindfulness journey, or I would dare to say, my, my love for being present in the moment and all the ways that one may maybe lead to it started for me in 2000 and 12, when I.

Really just kind of within a big transition of my life from, you know, collegiate life [00:02:00] to work, professional work life to moving new locations and really experiencing a lot of the transitions and the feelings and the sensations that came with transition. So moving in the ebbs and flows of daily life, moving in and out of feelings of like anxiousness, but then also moving in and out of feelings of connection and disconnection.

And I ended up having. A loss that of one of my aunts that was really dear to me. And on top of all of the sensations that were coming from the transitions that was another transition that really that created a lot of disconnection and a lot of heavy emotion. And so I found myself first at a yoga studio and in a class and moving my body.

And I just remember feeling that. Moment of connection with all of the sensations that I was experiencing. So all of the. The, the pain that I was experiencing, the sorrow, [00:03:00] a lot of the loss and the grief that I was experiencing I had a moment to actually feel it because for a moment I had withdrawn from it.

And that was also not a good feeling. And there was something about being present in the moment with my body. With my mind with the emotions of my heart that kept me coming back and from then it went from, you know, that, that yoga asana, that movement based practice to really diving deep into the study and the science of mindfulness.

And understanding, you know, MBSR, so Mindful Based Stress Reduction, and literally practicing it every day in my world. From the brushing of my teeth to the sipping of my coffee to mindful communication when I was around others. And then from there, honestly, it’s just really snowballed into.

Wanting to know more and getting curious about myself through the practices, wanting to dive deep and study the practices, wanting to then [00:04:00] share the practices and also not just, you know, the formal practices, but then also the benefits of, of being in relationship with these, like w

Ep. 58- Returning to Ourselves through Mindfulness with Ashley Williams

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Gissele Taraba: [00:00:00] So hello and welcome to the Love and Compassion podcast with Gissele.

We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives in our world. Don’t forget to like, and subscribe for more amazing content. Today, we’ll be chatting about the importance of mindfulness in the school system. My guest today is Ben Painter, co founder and partner at Whole School Mindfulness, which is at the forefront of integrating mindfulness into education to promote wellbeing, community, and justice.

Celebrated by mindful. org as the rising voice in the field, Ben is an accomplished facilitator with over 80 days in dedicated mindfulness meditation retreats, notably at Drupadrong Monastery in Northern Nepal. Ben excels in creating engaging and safe environments that inspire growth and learning, and he is recognized for his ability to connect deeply with individuals.

His [00:01:00] workshops are designed to enhance self awareness, emotional intelligence, and resiliency, equipping attendees with the skills to incorporate mindfulness into their lives and positively impact their communities. Please join me in welcoming Ben to the show. Hi, Ben.

Ben Painter: Hey, how you doing? I’m

Gissele Taraba: good. How are you?

Thank you so much for being on the show. I’m so excited to have this chat. I was wondering if you could start by telling the audience how you got into this work. How does, how did this sort of come about?

Ben Painter: Yeah, let’s see. It goes back to when I was a kid, actually. I had a couple of close family members who kind of went through it with fairly severe mental health challenges and mindfulness and meditation of different types was a part of their healing journey.

It wasn’t, you know, the silver bullet that made them all better, but it was a core part of it. And so I think it was kind of in my subconscious that these things could be helpful. And [00:02:00] then I went to High school in Concord, Massachusetts called Middlesex, and they had a really amazing, innovative way of introducing mindfulness to their students where there was somebody whose job it was to do that.

His title was the mindfulness director. His name is Doug Worthen. And he’s still the mindfulness director there full time. And I really just. liked him as a person and as a mentor. And so at first it was, it was kind of just like, Oh yeah, I’d heard about this mindfulness thing, knew it could be helpful.

This guy, Doug seems really awesome. I want to do whatever he’s doing. So I started to get into mindfulness then and took all the classes with him. I could, and then started going on retreats as a fairly young person. And just fell in love with the practice, what it can do to your mind. And also the communities built around the practice and yeah, it’s been a core part of my life ever since.

And the story of [00:03:00] how I got into this work with whole school mindfulness. And what we do is essentially we’re trying to launch other mindfulness teaching positions in schools across the U S. Was the model that was pioneered at Middlesex was successfully scaled once a few different puzzle pieces came together.

There was a funder that helped kind of grease the wheels of bureaucracy at the school to get it going. There was a school who’s willing and interested in integrating mindfulness. And then there was a person who was a right fit for that community had a deep practice and the puzzle pieces kind of came together.

And. The program in a school in Texas was launched and I was just graduating college. I had a first job working at this amazing organization called New Profit. And yeah, long story short, we decided to start an organization to, to try to

Ep. 57- Conversation with Ben Painter on the power of mindfulness in the school system

TRANSCRIPT

Gissele overdub: [00:00:00]

Hello and welcome to the Love and Compassion podcast with Giselle. We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives and our world. Don’t forget to like and subscribe for more amazing content. On today’s podcast, we’ll be talking about forgiving one’s enemy.

CARSA, Christian Action for Reconciliation and Social Assistance Organization, is doing some incredible work. They’re bringing together victims and oppressors for conversation. Carsa Ministries serves communities in supporting their journey towards healing, forgiveness, reconciliation, and sustainable holistic development.

Please join me in welcoming Carsa Ministries Executive Director, Christophe Mbonyingabo did I say it right?

Christophe: It

Gissele overdub: was. Welcome, Christophe. Welcome to the show. Thank you.

Christophe: Thank you very much. I’m glad to be with you today.

Gissele overdub: Yes, I am so excited to speak with you [00:01:00] because I believe that the work that you’re doing is so, so important.

Right now the world, It just seems so divided whether it be a, a long political divisions or among like this, even people, people canceling one another. So I think right now organizations that are working to bring people together, I think matter so greatly. Can you tell us a little bit about how this organization got started?

Christophe: Thank you very much. CARSA itself is a Rwandan based organization that started just 10 years after the genocide against the Tutsi means 2000 and close to 2004. That’s when we got registered by the government of Rwanda and CARSA started as a local grassroots initiative to try to restore the brokenness.

That has resulted from the genocide but alsopeople have to remember that the genocide did not start [00:02:00] in 1994 and the genocide did not end in 1994 because prior to 1994, there had been a long. era of division, you know, hatred and ideology that’s led to the 1994 genocide,

It was so huge consequences as a result of the genocide that’s needed to be addressed from various aspects. To try to contribute to see if forgiveness, reconciliation, restoration was possible. So that’s how CARSA gets started. And since then, about 20 years now, we’ve been, you know, trying to do that mission, which is very difficult, but exciting.

Gissele overdub: What you said is so critical because it didn’t start straight into genocide. It started with division and separation and the division between these two groups and seeing each other as enemies and not as brothers and sisters. And then that contributed too. So I think this is an important lesson for people to understand that it’s not [00:03:00] just about minor conflict.

It’s about this othering that results in then greater separation and greater conflict. And then you kind of have this division and genocide between these groups, right?

Christophe: Sure. You know, you know sometimes when people learn about the genocide that took place in Rwanda and they learned how within a hundred days, a million people were killed and killed by their neighbors, their friends, the people they knew.

If you do numbers, it was not what was happening, but if you tried to do numbers, it’s as if every second. Yeah. Six people were being killed. So people don’t have their mind around us. It’s very difficult to even understand how that can be possible. And remember it was a brutal killings because it was done using traditional weapons.

So people ask questions, how can this happen? Explain, but they tend to [00:04:00] forget that’

Ep.56- Conversation with Christophe Mbonyingabo: How can we love our enemies?

Gissele overdub: [00:00:00] Hello and welcome to the Love and Compassion podcast with Giselle. We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives and our worlds. Don’t forget to like, and subscribe for more amazing content.

Today we’ll be talking about bringing compassion into the school system, and we’ll be talking to Kara Cosby, who is the Compassionate Schools Project Teacher at Englehart Elementary School in Louisville, Kentucky she has delivered the Flourish curriculum in grades K to five for six years and is a Compassionate Schools Project Flourish teacher trainer.

She’s also a certified mindfulness director with Whole School Mindfulness. She has completed a master’s degree in elementary education and teaching from the University of Louisville, and has a master’s in education and educational leadership and administration from [00:01:00] Asbury University. Please join me in welcoming Kara.

Hi, Kara. Hello. Hello. Hello. I’m so excited to talk to you because I think compassion in the school system is so, so needed, especially at this time. I was wondering if you could tell the audience a little bit about how you started in this work. How is it that you became this compassionate schools.

Project teacher.

Kara: Okay, so I was a fourth and fifth grade teacher in JCPS. I moved away to Denver, Colorado. I taught for two years there. And then when I decided to come back to Louisville, I kept seeing these positions called the Compassionate schools project. I had no idea what it was but I saw there was several.

So I applied for them. And then I, of course, after applying, started investigating to see, okay, what is this compassionate schools project? What do they do? And then when [00:02:00] I dove a little deeper and found out like what it really involves, I thought, wow, because. I am totally into vision boards, and I had had on my vision board for about a year that I was going to teach yoga.

And so when I found out that this position actually incorporated mindful movement I was so excited. And so that’s how the whole journey began.

Gissele overdub: I love vision boards, and I love being able to kind of align with your manifestation. So that’s, that’s pretty exciting.

Kara: That’s what it felt like, that full circle moment.

Gissele overdub: Yeah, for sure. I love it when life happens like that. Tell us a little bit about what sort of, curriculum you delivered to the young people and maybe perhaps how you define compassion.

Kara: Okay, so the curriculum is broken into 7 units. It starts from the beginning where it’s all about self and, and just learning how to be your [00:03:00] best self and just what is compassion. And so we dive into that first. It’s a very short unit, but then it travels after you introduce compassion into emotions.

Unit three is like all about being your best self. self. So we talk about like what we need to be our best selves. I love the emotions unit because it gives me the chance to show inside out, which is literally one of my favorite cartoons. And so Oh, as it goes from self, it moves into friendships and relationships.

So we moved from self to friendships, relationships, just how we interact with others. Then the last two units are like community based. So it moves out of. I mean, it’s still about relationship building, but much more on a wider scale. And so we finish out with unit seven, which is a community service project.

You come up with the project for your school and it’s something that you guys do for the community. And that’s how it all ends every [00:04:00] year. So for me, In terms of like what compassion is in my definition p

Ep.55- Conversation with Kara Cosby: Compassion in the School System

Gissele Taraba: [00:00:00]

 Hello. And welcome to the love and compassion podcast with Gissele.

We believe that love and compassion have the power to heal our lives and our world. Don’t forget to like, and subscribe for more amazing content. Today, we’re going to talk about people pleasing and how compassion can help us address those needs.

 Today I’m talking with Tina O Hoang, who is a disabled recovering people, pleaser and podcaster.

She strives to ensure women have the space to choose themselves and to share their courageous stories. Whether it be changing how They’re perceived within a family dynamic, leaving a comfortable nine to five or advocating for themselves. She believes that women of color are allowed to take the first step and don’t need permission to do so.

After someone told her that her passivity was unattractive, she took it and decided to become as assertive and courageous as she could ever be. With a master’s [00:01:00] degree in career counseling, Tina also understands the hardship of career changes

She knows that even when we’re scared of making the first step, we need to just say F it and do it anyways.

Please join me in welcoming Tina. Hi Tina. Hi Giselle. Yay. Thank you for having me. Oh no, thank you for being on the show. Let’s talk people pleasing. As a person who is the complete opposite, because I didn’t feel loved or accepted, I just went, screw it. I’m just going to do what I can.

And I was so confrontational. So if you could share a little bit with me about how the opposite feels, the people pleasing and what got you to be in that state.

Tina Juan: Yeah. So I think for the longest time, I think honestly, like, My feeling like how you are, it was deep inside me this whole time.

F everything..

I don’t care about it. I just want to do everything. But somehow, I think maybe within my own culture, family is important. [00:02:00] Because in my culture, whatever you do as a child reflects to your parents and people blame. My parents, if I were to act differently, so like if I went to act out and just like screw everything, you know, do all the bad things you could think of, there’s like, Oh, is your mom’s fault?

That’s why she can’t raise you. Right. Or is your dad’s fault? They, he didn’t know how to discipline you in the right way. And so everything goes back to my parents and. You know, growing up too is honestly, first few things I remember of making sure my mom was always happy. I think that’s like the main thing for me is like,we grew up in a single household, and she was always, she was working double shift every single day, like seven days a week.

She was, she was a business owner, and the fact that, um, the fact that she [00:03:00] would leave work for like, for lunch. Come over, come to school, hang out with me and my brother, and then go back to school and then go back to work. Yeah, and so, you know, so there was this, so there was this, um, precedent of mom is making all these sacrifices for us.

 as a single mom, I need to make sure that whatever she does is makes her happy.

Gissele Taraba: Yeah,

Tina Juan: and also need her to accept me as a person because she’s because I think in the ages around, I think the primal age is like zero to seven.

That’s where like, Okay. You really need your parents around that time, she was working, you know, and that gravitation of like, I need people to love me, I need people to like me, if they don’t, then if I don’t act a certain way, they’ll leave, they’ll leave me forever. And so that kind of that grew the notion of like, [00:04:00] pleasing people pleasing

Ep.54- Conversation with Tina O Hoang: Addressing people pleasing with Compassion

Love and Compassion Podcast-Where Gissele talks with everyday exceptional people
who have overcome adversities and have wisdom to share.

Gissele Taraba

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