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The Marvel of Marriage (Ephesians 5:21-33)
62 Plays2 years ago
The Marvel of Marriage (Ephesians 5:21-33)
Ephesians: Growing in Christ
Sunday Message recorded 07 May 2023
by Pastor Victor Morrison
First Baptist Church
1700 Milam
Columbus, TX, USA 78934
Recommended
Transcript
Grace and Personal Connection with God
00:00:06
Speaker
Wow, the presence of the Lord is here. I'm so glad you're here that you can be a part of just experiencing him. The one that's tugging at your heart is the Lord. You know, we were singing about grace. You know, one of the verses I love in the Bible that talks about grace, it says, but thanks be to God.
00:00:27
Speaker
who gives us, that's grace, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Because He overcame, He can give us the victories that we're looking for so desperately.
Relevance of the Bible Today
00:00:39
Speaker
You know, if you would, open up God's word to Ephesians. We're going through the book of Ephesians. This is next in line. We're just going verse by verse and seeing what God wants to talk to us about. I've often said that the Bible is not just what God has said in the past. It's what God is saying in the present. And so that's why we wanna listen to what he says.
Living a Spirit-Filled Life
00:01:01
Speaker
I guarantee you, it will recalibrate us. But whenever you get to Ephesians five,
00:01:08
Speaker
We were talking about walking, walking in step with the Lord as you go through each day. But then we came upon this whole idea of the Holy Spirit giving us the strength so that we can walk, the Holy Spirit giving us direction through the word of God so that we'll know in which way we should walk.
00:01:28
Speaker
And so that's where we've been looking at the Spirit-filled life.
Marvel at God's Grace and Works
00:01:32
Speaker
And now we're going to start with verse, well, I'll read verse 21 just so that you have the context. But we're going to go from 21 all the way down to the end of the chapter, verse 33. But I want to give you sort of like something you can hang your hat on as we look at this passage.
00:01:50
Speaker
You know, the things of God cause me to marvel. Have you ever just stood back like amazing grace and you just marvel over God's grace, over God's mercy, over God's love, over God's truth, over God's justice and so forth?
Sharing God's Grace and Kindness
00:02:06
Speaker
Well, the word marvel is mentioned in the Bible 43 times, 43 times. And back in Moses' day, Exodus 34.10 says, before all your people, the Lord is talking. He said, before all your people, I will do marvels.
00:02:24
Speaker
such as have not been created of all the earth." And then 1 Chronicles 16, 24 goes on to say, declare his marvelous works among all the people. So as we witness God working, we should declare it to other people. As we see what he did through the pages of scripture, we should declare it to other people. Job 9, 10 says,
00:02:49
Speaker
that God does great things and unsearchable, marvelous things without number. So what that means is he never taps out. He's never done. You know, after three hours in the sun yesterday, like Steven Tice was, well, Steven led us out there, but Josh was saying earlier, man, I was done. I was toast.
00:03:10
Speaker
when I got home that afternoon, yesterday afternoon. But it was a great thing because we declared the marvelous grace of
Marveling at Jesus' Miracles
00:03:18
Speaker
God. We declared the marvelous gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. We shared the word of God with people. We shared your gift to them of $20 for each tank that came through there. And they were so appreciative.
00:03:33
Speaker
You know, in the Gospels, it also talks about other specific things that caused those who were around Jesus to marvel. For example, Matthew 8, 27 says they marveled at Jesus's control over the wind and the waves of the sea.
00:03:52
Speaker
Matthew 9.33 says they marveled whenever he cast out a demon, whenever a man that couldn't speak because of the demon, he spoke. And so it's incredible. Matthew 21.20 says that the disciples marveled whenever Jesus cursed a fig tree. It was symbolic, but he cursed a fig tree. You know what? It withered. And so they marveled when they came back and saw, oh my goodness, it did exactly what he told it to do.
Marriage as a Divine Institution
00:04:20
Speaker
In Luke 4, 22, it says that the people of Jesus' day, when they heard him teach, when they heard him speak, it says that they marveled at his gracious words. Luke 24, 41 says they also marveled. There were at least, there were over 500 people that saw him after he rose from the dead. And it says that they marveled over his glorious resurrection. And in 2 Thessalonians 1, 10, I like this one.
00:04:49
Speaker
We're all going to stand back a marvel when Jesus comes back to this earth. And I'm thinking, wow, everything that God does is just incredible. It's marvelous. And so I want to show you something that got my attention, you know, that reminds me, I mean, I haven't even talked about the marvel of the heavens and the marvel of the earth and how God created them. I haven't talked about the human body, how fearfully and wonderfully each of us are made.
00:05:17
Speaker
There's a video series in our church library called Made in His Image, and it helps you to look at the miracle of birth. You know, whenever a little baby's born, it's miraculous how that happens. And so then the uniqueness of the human hand.
00:05:35
Speaker
There's nothing like the human hand in all the world. Only humans were given this kind of hand, that kind of thumb, and all these different things. The uniqueness of human hands and the beauty of motion. You know, there was a lot of movement going on yesterday as they lined up with cars all the way past the tracks.
00:05:56
Speaker
And I was running back and forth for a while, and I thought, why don't I let some of the young guys go back and forth? But anyway, man, I'm glad I can move, though. I'm glad I can walk. Aren't you glad you could be here today? That's God's gift to you, you know? But then to think about the marvel of the human eye.
00:06:11
Speaker
that we can see. We can see all the marvelous, beautiful things that God has made. Well, what I want you to do is to marvel when I read about marriage. Because you know what? I think sometimes people are really talking down and talking smack about marriage these days. And if you just take a look at it and spin it around, you'll think, wow.
00:06:36
Speaker
the God that created marriage, the God that instituted marriage, he knew what he was doing. And so that's what I want us to do today as we look at Ephesians chapter five, verse 21, down through verse 33. I guarantee you, after we look at this, you're gonna be standing beside me and saying, oh God, how marvelous are your works. Let's stand together in honor of God's word.
00:07:01
Speaker
Ephesians 5, 21 is where I'll start, submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives submit to your own husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its savior. Now, as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
00:07:30
Speaker
Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. That he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.
00:07:57
Speaker
in the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself, for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.
00:08:15
Speaker
Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." This mystery is profound, and I'm saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you
00:08:33
Speaker
love his wife as himself and let the wife see that she respect her husband. Let's go to the father in prayer. Lord, I thank you so much for the wisdom that's found in your word. Certainly it was with your wisdom that you instituted marriage. I couldn't improve upon it. Lord, I would only mess things up. I thank you for just the way you designed it.
00:08:56
Speaker
So help us, O Lord, as we look at it today. I realize that all of us have more than likely seen good examples of marriages, and maybe we've seen bad examples of marriages. Maybe some within this room have been through a lot of pain and hurt and heartache because of marriage. But it was not because of marriage the way you designed it. It's because of the way we've made marriage to be. So help us, O Lord, to look back at the original blueprints
00:09:25
Speaker
of what it is that you had in mind whenever you instituted marriage. And I pray you'd take our breath away. I pray that we would stand amazed when we leave this place over how wise you are. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.
Roles in Marriage: Love and Respect
00:09:40
Speaker
Thank you, you may be seated.
00:09:43
Speaker
Let's spend this precious and priceless jewel of marriage. Let's spin it around. Let's just admire it from five different facets as it is given to us here in God's word. The first thing I want you to notice, go all the way to the end. Maybe say, why don't you start at the beginning? No, let's start at the end. Because verse 33 tells us the design. It says, however, let each one of you love his wife,
00:10:09
Speaker
as himself, and let the wife see that she respect her husband.
00:10:15
Speaker
You know, Genesis chapters one and two, they reveal to us something that we wouldn't know if it wasn't for him. See, we might think that society came up with marriage, but it didn't. You know, marriage was God's idea. He's the one who thought it up. And as a matter of fact, he made all this world, he made us, he made everything here, the animals, the trees, the flowers, he made it all.
00:10:40
Speaker
And he kept looking at everything he made. He said, that's good, that's good, that's good, that's good. And you know what happened in chapter two? He said, you know what? That's not good. What was not good was that man was left alone in that Garden of Eden.
00:10:55
Speaker
And you know what, I read the other day, I think I heard this on the news. It said that one out of every two people feel lonely today. One out of every two. Why? Because sometimes we're going to social media, but it won't fit the need. It won't fill that need of actually knowing somebody.
00:11:14
Speaker
personally, in our lives, being with them. That's why I invite you to, after this service, every one of you in this room are welcome to go to one of our small group Bible studies. It's a group of fellowship. It's a group around God's word. God's word is taught. That's what pulls that lesson along. So I just invite you, connect with other people. God made us to connect. And when he sees somebody trying to do life by themselves, he said, that's not good.
00:11:43
Speaker
And he saw that it was not good that Adam was by himself. And so in Genesis 2 18, it says that he made a helper fit for him, just right. Eve was gonna be just right the way that God designed Eve for Adam. You can see in Ephesians 5 33 where we are that really marriage is a covenant relationship,
The Cycles of Marriage
00:12:06
Speaker
a covenant relationship between a man and a woman.
00:12:10
Speaker
It's clear that the roles that he gave were he wanted someone to be a leader and he wanted someone to be a helper. It's not about inferiority, nope. It's not about inequality, nope. They're both equal. They're both important. They're both valuable.
00:12:29
Speaker
But the thing is, God says we need to clarify the responsibilities and the roles. And so the husband was responsible. His core responsibility was to love his wife. It's repeated over and over again. As a matter of fact, that gets the most attention in this whole passage. Husbands, love your wives like Christ loved the church. That is the central core responsibility that every husband
00:12:53
Speaker
Every husband in this room, every husband on the face of the earth, that's the main thing God had in mind when he designed marriage. He said, I'm going to make it where the one that's the leader, the husband, he is going to love his wife. But he also made it where the wife is going to be supporting. She is going to be respectful. She is going to work with him and cooperate with him. And so the wife was responsible to respect.
00:13:20
Speaker
her husband. That's exactly what it says in this verse 33. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself and let the wife see that she respects her husband. It's so clear. So why are there problems? Well, I want to give you the words of a man who's been a marriage counselor for 30 years. For 30 years, this man named Emerson Eggerich, he spent
00:13:45
Speaker
30 years studying scientific and biblical research, looking at the Bible, looking at life, talking to people that would come into his office, and he's written several books on this subject. He himself has been married since 1973 to his wife, Sarah. They have three children.
00:14:05
Speaker
They live in Grand Rapids, Michigan. He earned a PhD from the Michigan State University. But the main thing he tries to do is to point people in the direction of the simplicity of God's word. God's word just takes it all and simplifies it. And he said, you know what I think the problem is? I want to show you a diagram that he put on there. Let's go to that next slide if we could. There's a diagram right there.
00:14:31
Speaker
Here's what he said he's noticed. I'll read, these are his words, not my words. He said, when a wife feels unloved, she tends to react in ways that feel disrespectful to her husband. All right, so you see what's happening? The wife feels unloved. So her reaction is going to be, wait a minute, I'm not going to respect my husband because he doesn't make me feel loved.
00:14:56
Speaker
But then he goes on to write, when a husband feels disrespected, he tends to react in ways that feel unloving toward his wife. And so he gave this diagram a title, The Crazy Cycle. It probably took him a long time to come up with it. But anyway, he comes up with this title of, okay, so without the love, she reacts without giving him the respect he's looking for. And so on and on it goes round and round.
00:15:25
Speaker
But you know what he said? He tells those that come into his office. He said, I tell them there's a better cycle, not called the crazy cycle, but called the reward cycle. So if you're an artist, why don't you draw this on your little note paper that you're taking, especially if you're a note taker. But if not, picture it in your mind, okay? Picture the same diagram that's up there. Only instead of saying without love at the top, write these words, his love.
00:15:54
Speaker
His love, the husband's love, write that at the top. And then on the right-hand side, instead of seeing the words she reacts, instead of doing that, she's gonna regardless of, write the words regardless of, instead of she reacts. So his love, regardless of, her respect is across the bottom instead of without respect, her respect. And then right on the other side, on the left-hand side, regardless of his love.
Devotion and Spiritual Connection in Marriage
00:16:24
Speaker
So you see what they're saying? See what he's saying? He's saying this cycle is never going to end. It'll never get better. It'll always go round and round and round. And the only way to break it is for somebody to say, you know what? I'm going to give unconditional love. You know what? I'm going to give respect because God told me to give respect to my husband. That's the only way it ever works is whenever somebody says, okay, that's what I'm going to do.
00:16:50
Speaker
I'm going to give my wife unconditional love regardless of her respect level for me and the wife is going to respect her husband obediently to God's design regardless of their love.
00:17:03
Speaker
And then it's amazing how he said, I've seen it transform couples' lives, where whenever they begin to taste God's unconditional love, whenever they begin to trust what God has revealed in his word, suddenly powerful things, marvelous things begin to happen in that marriage. So that's all under this one idea of the design. That's how God designed marriage to work. But the second thing is maybe it's saying, well, what's gonna motivate them
00:17:31
Speaker
To do any of this, that's the second thing I wanted to point out in this text. The devotion within marriage. Sometimes maybe you'd say, I just don't feel the devotion, the commitment, the motivation to respect my husband or to love my wife. So it's not there. But I want you to notice something that's very small, but it's so significant. Verse 22, wives, submit your own husbands.
00:18:01
Speaker
as to the Lord, as to the Lord. You see, there's the motivation. The motivation is not, how's your husband doing? The motivation is as to the Lord. So I'm gonna do this, Lord, because I trust you, because I believe you're wise, because I believe your word is true. So I'm gonna trust you. That's the motivation. That's where the devotion comes from toward your marriage is to say, Lord, all of this is about you.
00:18:30
Speaker
I want you to hold your place there and look at just a couple of books over at Colossians. It's not far. If you just go over, you'll see Philippians, then you'll see Colossians. And in Colossians chapter 3, from verse 12 all the way down through like maybe, let's see how far it goes.
00:18:51
Speaker
Maybe down through verse 21. That's what I use whenever I'm going through premarital counseling with a couple. And one of the things I bring out is verse 17. And of course we go to verse 18 eventually, but verse 17 says, and whatever you do,
00:19:11
Speaker
In word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. You see, what he's saying is not only the motivation, but the navigation. I'm looking now at how do I navigate through my marriage.
00:19:27
Speaker
The way to navigate through your marriage is to say, I'm only going to have attitudes that will glorify God. I'm only going to have attitudes that will honor Him. And that's what it's talking about in verse 17. It doesn't say we get to pick and choose. Like whenever we go to showables, you can pick and choose what you like in there. But that's not the way it is with God's Word.
00:19:49
Speaker
We can't pick and choose. We have to say, okay, all right, I will navigate by what you've revealed in your word. And what he says is you have to do it for God's glory. That will help you navigate through those things that you're trying to figure out and trying to understand.
00:20:06
Speaker
I think another helpful verse is found in verse 18 of Colossians 3. So don't leave if you're in Colossians 3, 17. Look at the next verse. Wives, submit to your husbands as is fitting in the Lord, as is fitting in the Lord.
00:20:22
Speaker
So nobody's asking you to do something immoral. Nobody's asking you to do something that's ungodly or whatever, but as is fitting in the Lord. So I thought, now there's the application to my marriage. In other words, I'm saying, okay, Lord, I'm going to do this and I'm gonna do it out of obedience to your word. So whatever obeys your word, that's what I'm going to do. Do you see where I'm headed with this whole idea of the devotion within marriage?
00:20:51
Speaker
See, some people tend to think, well, I think marriage is cultural. I think marriage is political. No, it's not either one of those. You know what it is? It's spiritual. Marriage is spiritual. It won't work if we don't put Christ at the center. And so that's why every time when I do
00:21:09
Speaker
premarital counseling. I tell the couples, you have to build your life on Jesus Christ. You have to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. So many people are trying to do life without God's help. Remember, as a matter of fact, when I was researching this passage to get ready for the message, you won't believe what countless Bible scholars said about this marriage. You know what they called it? They called it a spirit-filled marriage.
00:21:38
Speaker
going back to that whole idea of who's on the throne? Am I on the throne of my life or is Christ on the throne of my life? When Christ is on the throne, we invite the Holy Spirit to be our guide, to empower us and help us. I'm telling you there's a lot of things about marriage that aren't easy. Everybody knows that.
00:21:57
Speaker
But the thing is, to whom do we go whenever we're saying, I need strength, I need guidance, I need help. And so that's why I'm trying to tell you the devotion is so important.
00:22:09
Speaker
When Jody and I sent out our wedding announcements, you know, we were married in 1985, August the 10th, right here. I wrote it down so I wouldn't forget it. But anyway, I'm kidding Jody, I did. But anyway, August the 10th, 1985, I got married right here in Columbus, Texas in First Baptist Church. Jody and I stood here, but when we invited everybody to come, you know what? Our one verse, we only sent one verse out on every card we invited them to come. You know what it was?
00:22:37
Speaker
It was Psalm 34.3, Psalm 34.3 because the two of us came from two different backgrounds. One, Tennessee Hick, the other one, Texas girl. And so we came from two different backgrounds, two different families, a lot of different experiences, but we said, you know what? We're gonna agree on one thing. You know what the one thing says in Psalm 34.3? Oh, magnify the Lord with me and let us exalt his name together.
00:23:06
Speaker
That's what marriage is all about, to say, I'm going to exalt the Lord. That's what marriage is all about. We magnify Him.
00:23:14
Speaker
So as we magnify him, we go back to the design and we say, okay, Lord, I'm ready. I've been through a lot of bad experiences and bump roads and all bumpy roads and all this different things. Please show me, Lord, what is the way for a marriage to work? How can we get that marvelous marriage that is depicted in this passage?
Leadership Role and Sacredness in Marriage
00:23:34
Speaker
So I want you to go back to Ephesians five. I want us to look at this passage and to look at verses 22 to 24 and to look at verse 31.
00:23:43
Speaker
See, the marvel of marriage is also seen in the Lord's delegation of responsibilities. His appointment of roles. It's not based on merit. Some of you may be thinking, I know why they sang that song about the victor's crown, the pastor's name's Victor. He wanted them to sing that song. No, I didn't know they were going to sing that song till I came in here. But once again, remember the verse I started with.
00:24:09
Speaker
But thanks be to God who gives us the victory in our Lord Jesus Christ. You know what I did to earn the name Victor? I cried when they spanked me. You know, when they pulled me up, they spanked me, I cried. And so then when they brought me to my mom, you know what I was doing? I was sleeping. So I didn't do anything to deserve the name Victor. The only victory I have is victory in Jesus. And I offer that to you through Christ. You can have victory in Jesus as well. So this is not based on merit.
00:24:39
Speaker
This is based on responsibility, on roles. What's our assignment? What did God say He wanted us to do? So when I read through here, I thought, I see two. Let me give you the two things, leaving and leading. Leaving and leading. So first, let's go to the end of this text and look at what it says in verse 31. Therefore, a man shall leave.
00:25:04
Speaker
his father and mother, and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." I just want to focus on that for a moment. You see, he leaves underneath his parents umbrella of authority.
00:25:20
Speaker
So whenever a man says, you know what, I think this girl is the girl that God has for me. I want us to together glorify, magnify, honor the Lord Jesus Christ. I want him to be the center of our relationship. So whenever that man does that, he's leaving the authority from his father and the authority there underneath his parents' leadership and so forth. So he's leaving underneath that. Whenever a girl, someone proposes to her,
00:25:48
Speaker
Up until that point, whenever they're married, when they're pronounced husband and wife, up until that moment during the wedding ceremony, you know what? That girl's still under her father's authority, still under her parents' authority. And so that's why it's very dangerous for girls to allow a guy to become a greater authority in her life.
00:26:09
Speaker
than her parents. Her parents are the ones that are going to be held accountable to God. But the girl is responsible not to say, well, whatever my boyfriend tells me to do, I got to do that because look at what the Bible says. The Bible says that a lady who marries that the wife follows her husband's leadership and only her husband. Look, it's not talking about
00:26:33
Speaker
Every woman needs to be respectful or obedient or whatever word you want to use submissive to every single man. That's not right.
00:26:41
Speaker
No, it's to her own husband. That's where some people are getting tripped up. It's also voluntary. It's out of her love for God that she's going to say, okay, I respect that God has placed my husband in this relationship as the leader. But up until the marriage, up until the pronouncement of husband and wife,
00:27:03
Speaker
I just think every young lady needs to remember you're under your parents' authority still. But whenever that man leaves his father and mother and goes into that wedding ceremony and he says, I do. Whenever I ask him, do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife? And she says, I do. He says, I do, and so forth. Listen, that right there changes everything.
00:27:30
Speaker
because then he's leaving. He's leaving his parents' authority, but once he gets over there, you need to be very careful about this one. Once he gets over there, he's not supposed to leave that relationship. You know, in Matthew 19, verses 3 through 9, it talks about, you know, should they get a divorce? Should they break up? You know, if things aren't working right there.
Permanence and Challenges in Marriage
00:27:53
Speaker
You know, Matthew 9, verses 3 through 9, Jesus says, from the beginning,
00:27:58
Speaker
Whenever the father set it up between a male and a female, between a man and a woman to come together in holy matrimony, he didn't intend for them to ever end that relationship apart from death. Now after death, that's different. But anyway, I just thought, wow.
00:28:14
Speaker
But I don't think we're always realizing these things. It says, for the husband is the head of the wife in this passage, Ephesians 5, 22 to 24 and verse 31 and so forth. And so some may think, well, what about if my husband, he's not really living for God?
00:28:31
Speaker
He's a good man, but he takes care of me, but he's not living for God. Well, you might want to write down 1 Peter 3, 1 and 2, because it says, even if some do not obey the word, even if some do not obey the word, we still should be supportive. We still should be committed. We still should say, I'm all in.
00:28:51
Speaker
I just wanted to say one other thing that I think is amazing is 1 Corinthians 11.3 talks about how, you know, the husband is the head of the wife, you know, and so forth. But you know what it also says? It says the head of Christ is God. God the Father. Is God the Father better? Is He more valuable? Is He more important than Jesus, the Son of God? No.
00:29:17
Speaker
but they know the roles and the responsibilities. And so Jesus gladly supports the Father. The Father gladly honors and glorifies the Son. You see, that's what marriage should be. It shouldn't be some competition. It shouldn't be some tension and war that's going on. I also saw the direction for marriage in verses 25 to 31. This passage makes it so clear, if the husband is the leader,
00:29:45
Speaker
And if the wife is gonna be the helper, the supporter, gonna be there for him, then where's the husband gonna lead the marriage? There's one place. It's easy. All you gotta do is read the verses about marriage that are found right here. That one place is Christ like love. Christ like love. That's where he's supposed to lead the marriage. That's where he's going.
00:30:10
Speaker
You see, Christ's love in verse 25 was sacrificial. Remember the way he loves us? It says he gave himself up for her. I think a husband that loves his wife sacrificially that says, you know what? I'm going to work so hard. I'm going to do everything I can to provide for you and to provide for my kids and so forth. That's incredible.
00:30:33
Speaker
But then there's also sanctifying love. It says that Jesus cleansed the church. He cleansed her. He washes her with a washing of water with a word. You see, I think a husband also is leading in the direction of a purifying love, a sanctifying love. A husband shouldn't be trying to pull his wife away from God. A husband ought to be saying, come on, you walk in fellowship with the Lord and follow him.
00:31:01
Speaker
And then verse 29, when he talks about nourishing and cherishing, that whenever a husband loves his wife, he cherishes and nourishes his own body. So that's how he ought to love his wife. So it's like this incredible supportive type of love.
00:31:19
Speaker
Someone has said this, that wives give a picture of the church to a watching world. The world's watching, every Christian family, the world's watching. And so what you're gonna tell them is, this is what churches like.
00:31:33
Speaker
But then also, the husband gives a picture of Christ to a watching world. So the watching world is looking at a Christian marriage and they're saying, so that's what Jesus is like, just like that man's living, just like that husband treats his wife, just like that husband loves his wife. You see, really, sometimes I think we need to slow it down and listen to what these words are saying, like the word submit. The word submit means putting the will of another ahead of your will.
00:32:02
Speaker
So if I'm not going to submit to the Lord, if I'm not going to submit to my husband, if you look at verse 21, submitting to one another out of reference for Christ, if I'm not going to submit to other people,
00:32:15
Speaker
Then what does that say? It says, I'm only going to get my will. It's just my will. That's the only thing I want, is my will. But submission means I'm putting the will of another ahead of my will. But you know what love does? Love puts the needs of another ahead of our needs. So once again, the husband is accountable for all of this.
00:32:39
Speaker
Sometimes we ought to go back as husbands. I'm including myself, right? Genesis 3.9. Genesis 3.9, whenever they blew it, see Adam and Eve both, they blew it. And God comes to hold them accountable for what they did. Have you ever thought about Genesis 3.9?
00:32:58
Speaker
Here's what it says, Genesis 3, nine. But the Lord called out to the man, the Lord called out to the man and said to him, where are you? Where are you? And so it's time for men to say, we're responsible for the direction of our homes and this is the direction that we're going. I just think that's the way God designed it. If you spin that jewel around in your hand, that's it.
Marriage Reflects Christ and the Church
00:33:28
Speaker
But then let me close with the diagram for marriage. It won't take long. See, I'm a visual learner. I remember one time I wanted to give both of my girls a bicycle for Christmas. So my wife and I picked them out. She said, you want to get the store to put this together? And I said, no, I got tools. I can do this.
00:33:47
Speaker
Man, on Christmas Eve after we put the girls down, I was like, oh my goodness, look at this. This thing is 25 pages of written instruction. There's no pictures. I like pictures, okay? I think I'm not alone on that. Well, the Holy Spirit portrays how a marriage works. You know what he did? He gave us a visual depiction and he said, just look at Jesus and just look at the church.
00:34:13
Speaker
See, there's a diagram of headship whenever he says in verse 23, as Christ is head of the church, as Christ is head of the church. And then whenever you go to verse 24, there's a diagram of submission as the church submits to Christ. And then in verse 25 to 30, there's a diagram of love as Christ loved the church. No wonder in verse 32,
00:34:41
Speaker
Whenever the apostle Paul is getting all of this from the Holy Spirit and the Holy Spirit says, you know what? This is too much for you, Paul. So I want you to write this down, verse 32. This mystery is profound. You know what you can translate? I think it'd be good translating that and say, this mystery is too marvelous for you humans. You can't get it. You always wanna try to improve on it, but you can't get it. This mystery is profound and I'm saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
00:35:08
Speaker
See an illustration just gives additional light on what's already written. Now my point in this message has been to admire with reverence and awe, with wonder, the amazing blessing of marriage.
00:35:24
Speaker
See, Jody and I, in this August, we will celebrate 38 years of being married to one another. Lots of joy, lots of gratitude. We're so thankful for the blessings that God has given to us. But would we say we're a perfect marriage? No, we're not a perfect marriage. We have to go back to the Lord all the time and say, help us, O Lord, forgive us, O Lord, strengthen us, O Lord.
00:35:48
Speaker
But you know what, I wanted to close in case there's somebody here and you're saying, your message is making me feel so guilty. I didn't mean that. I was just trying to get us to look at the marvelous invention or institution of marriage, right? But if you feel guilty, I just wanna tell you something. There's good news. We shared it at the Paid For You event yesterday. When we gave people $20 worth of free gas, what we said to them was, this is a gift.
00:36:17
Speaker
No strings attached. You don't have to come to our church. We're not asking for anything from you. This gift was paid for you. But it also gives us, in the few minutes you're in line, to tell you about something else far more marvelous that was also paid for you. You know what that something is? It's Jesus nailed our sin debt to the cross and He canceled it.
00:36:43
Speaker
And to me, that's the best thing I've ever heard in my whole life is that all of my sins and all of my mistakes and all of my rebellion can be forgiven. And so that's why I wanted to put that verse there from Colossians, that you could see it, that the list of sins that were against me, Jesus took it and he nailed it to the cross. You know what the father said?
00:37:07
Speaker
because my son's atonement, because his blood, because his life was perfect, I'm going to forgive you of all your sins.
Aligning with God's Design for Marriage and Life
00:37:15
Speaker
If you will repent of your sins, surrender to my son, trust what he did for you." Wow. So here's the thing. All of us have seen marriages that didn't work. We've all seen it. It's heartbreaking to see misery rather than marvel.
00:37:33
Speaker
But the thing I want you to remember is it's not God's fault. God didn't cause a marriage to be miserable. You know what? He wants it to be marvelous. And so as we do it his way, when we come back and line up with what he intended, that's when it begins to really experience the joy and all the wonderful things. But I just wanted to just encourage you, rather than riding off
00:38:01
Speaker
the institution of marriage because you've seen a few that were broken. Why don't you say, God, I'm so thankful that you wrote off my sins on that cross when you died on the cross. Why don't we stand together? I want to give you an opportunity as we close. You know, maybe that someone here needs to make a decision. I'd be glad to start a conversation with you. We can pray together.
00:38:26
Speaker
We can meet another time to talk more, but I just, I want to thank you for giving me the time to just simply spend marriage in your sight for all of us to look at the facets of it. It's glorious. It's marvelous. And I'm so thankful. I'm thankful even for marriages that let's say there's a husband that's already in glory or a wife that's already in glory. I'm just so thankful.
00:38:50
Speaker
for the way God made marriage. And so let's all give him thanks for that. But I wanna say, if you're still struggling with the weight of your sins, your sins can be forgiven, because Jesus already paid the price. Let's pray. Lord, thank you for this time to be together. I pray you bless us as we sing this last song. Lord, we're gonna just call it a song of invitation. And so Lord, we're not sending out an invitation ourselves,
00:39:19
Speaker
This is certainly not my invitation, it's your invitation.
Closing and Invitation to the Church
00:39:23
Speaker
I believe that spiritually with like a nail scarred hand, you would be stretching out your hand saying, come on to me, come on to me. Lay it all down. I've already paid the price on the cross for your forgiveness, for your restoration, for your strength, for your joy and for your peace. So bless this time and we'll just put it in your hands in Jesus name, Amen.
00:39:51
Speaker
This is a ministry of First Baptist Church, located at 1700 Milam Street, Columbus, Texas.