Transcript
Speaker: Thanks.
Speaker: Bye!
Speaker: Dance, dance
Speaker: It's a podcast. And we're going to talk and apparently Connor's here in the square. So. And Connor, I'm not a slut. I'm popular sir.
Speaker: Yeah, I'm sure you're popular. He called me a slut on Snapchat, Chris. Get it. I'm not a slut. I'm popular. I mean, you know, my sister said the same thing. She was popular in school, but in actuality, she was. Yes, she was. Yes, she was. I was popular. She was a slut. So, if the shoe fits. Don't worry. I got them on.
Speaker: about my sister and plus there's four of them to choose from. So either they're all going to be mad at me if they hear that or somebody's going to have a guilty conscience. Three are not going to care and somebody's going to have a guilty conscience and be pissed. So I'm just saying if I would have hooked up with your sister, we could be brothers for real. I'm just saying I probably would have for real. So technically, it's kind of a win on your book that I didn't just say. Yeah, but Chris doesn't want to kill himself.
Speaker: And if you guys became brothers, you kind of don't have an option anymore, right? Yeah, I mean, yeah, at this point, not being able to get rid of me. Yeah, right. This point, I can just every fucking Thanksgiving. I'm knocking on the door with that, dude. Just fucking go somewhere. It's fucking nightmare. Don't you have your own family to bother?
Speaker: You are my favorite fur! We probably have your own house. Like he says, he's not a slag. He's a slag. He's a bloody slag, you ax. Quit being a silly sausage. Like I said, I'm just very, very popular. I mean...
Speaker: I mean, I guess if that makes you feel better about yourself. Sure, why not? I think honors. Now to protest too much. I don't leave the house. How could I be a slut? I think Connors on my hands with the slut comment. However, however, it's not nice to slut shape.
Speaker: Yeah. I mean, Connor's right, but you're also saying him. Yes, you are. It's just because I call you on. Well, if you feel your manager issue, I would speak to your manager. I can call you what I want because I identify everybody.
Speaker: I assume your gender and sexual tendencies. I haven't even got the the intro out yet. Let's not piss off YouTube. I was going to say. I think I did a good job of doing that last time. It's actually called me a Karen. Alright. Alright. Yeah. I think I did a very good job. I missed YouTube while last night. So, we'll try to refrain from
Speaker: Well, we're probably going to miss a lot later, but anyway. Welcome to the nonsense as we start to show. Idiot two and three arguing back and forth. It's like it's not that I'm shaming you. It's just you are what you are. And if you feel shame from me telling the truth. No, I'm not. It's called jealousy.
Speaker: Listen, I get to lay around the house all day and be fat. That's not. That's not true. Let's be honest. None of us are fucking rails here, buddy. I'm sorry. None of us are hiding behind stop signs. Jeff. Jeff, shut up. Chris, do your intro. Get it over with. All right. You know what? I'm going to sit back. He farted it. I'm going to conduct this train wreck tonight. I'm just going to sit back. Yeah, absolutely did start it. This is his fault.
Speaker: Sit back and relax tonight I'm gonna phone it in like all you assholes do I don't know what you're talking about. I don't phone anything in Not getting railed actually I'm not a real host wait Let's be honest
Speaker: that it's not that we wanna get rails as much as we wanna do the railing. Yeah. I don't think he's very excited about it. Well, it is Saturday night. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's what is this? Good job, Jeffy. I don't know. Who is it? Who are these three guys on the screen? Who are these guys that are talking? Do your job, Jeffy. I'll give them that.
Speaker: So it is Saturday night. This is not physical nonsense. Hopefully you guys are having a good weekend so far and all that fun. Yes. Got Connor in the building. We got Jeff in the building. Of course you guys know me. I am. I am your champ. I am click. I'm going to take the night off. I'm going to put my hosting.
Speaker: job, uh, give it to these two numb knuckleheads and I'm just going to sit back and relax. I might watch a movie actually, you know, it's three or four. If it's just me and Jeff, probably, uh, probably play some rooms to hang out and talk shit about you guys.
Speaker: go live somewhere else you know speaking of social medias you can find us on social media yeah i can go live on like facebook or instagram or something like that by myself and just make fun of you guys and talk to you about this well yeah we do have facebook instagram x and tick tock you can also hang out with us live every monday wednesday and saturday night usually around 7 7 30
Speaker: on YouTube, Twitch, and Facebook. And you can also listen to us any place, any time. We're gonna listen to podcasts at all at nonsensical nonsense podcast. Or you can simply go to bio .link. All those links are there. Also the bio link is at the top of all of our social medias as well. And our links to our sponsors are in there also. They're being shaded. Kids in the backseat cause accidents.
Speaker: accidents in the backseat cause kids. Let's go. That's just facts. I mean, that's can't argue that. I think I saw that in the fifth grade textbook. I did, too. I think I wrote it in the fifth grade textbook. It was all spelled wrong, but yeah, actually, why is accidents public? Yeah, but you're checking the way you want it done, huh?
Speaker: What you what what you do? Just watching watching 90 day fiance. Hold on a second. Calm down. Calm down. We'll get excited in a minute. And I guess they're doing sex therapy. I guess the girl was like, you choke your chicken the way you want it. Choked in because I'm not doing it. I don't think we're going to get shut down many times tonight because this is the podcast and not the music show. However,
Speaker: I do have brand new music tonight. I haven't even heard this specifically. What is it? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I put that on the microwave so I can show you that. I told you he gives us shit for interrupting him when he's supposed to be doing his interaction. And Nicki does it. Oh, I got you, baby. What for him than we do. I mean, yeah, but that doesn't mean it doesn't count like they're doing the same thing. Like we don't get credit for the past. What? What?
Speaker: But anyways, so so brand new. I haven't even listened to it. They just dropped it yesterday and I waited on purpose. Brand new video, brand new song from our guys at Black Shop Mojo. So we're playing that in the first break tonight. We'll probably get in trouble. But I don't know if you want to say we really have permission from the fucking guys who wrote exactly how to play their music. And they still get to Zuckerberg on the phone. But so.
Speaker: We got that. It is an open door challenge. Saturday night. Anybody who wants to join us is welcome to join us. As long as you follow the rules. Yes. Have your camera on. Hey, I was getting my ass handed to me last night, Alyssa. You know what? Yeah, you were. Yeah, you were. You can hang out with a slide.
Speaker: You know, I would say that Lee's hitting the sauce, but I was going to say a little early, but I thought I forgot that it's like 1 o 'clock in the morning. It's already three sheets to the wind, but it's understood. It's a given at this point. You got some. Make sure I have this. OK.
Speaker: What is up with your light all of a sudden? Like it working and then it turns off and then is that just your screen? What the fuck to me? No, Chris. Oh, I don't know. I haven't been paying attention. I made my screen because I opened up another window. Wow. Way to go. Oh, he's surfing the Internet. I told you that. So I'm looking for something. They're looking for something to read. Well, I was going to tell you guys, hey, Google this.
Speaker: Speaking of speaking of Google, I actually got a I saw someone on Instagram today And it was literally right before I messaged you gentlemen about doing the show tonight So a woman was arrested After she went on a date first date with a guy and she got arrested. Can you guess why the next day she got arrested? She stole his kidney because he woke up in a bathtub and
Speaker: No, Mike. She texted him 156 ,000 times. Oh my god. He needs a cease and desist letter.
Speaker: I'm just saying. Helen, you're not a stalker anymore. That chick's a stalker. That's a lot of stuff. I was wondering how long it was going to take until you said something like, I'll get my leggy out of here full on the road. I'm like, I need to go get some sunglasses. Turn it down.
Speaker: but no so uh first and foremost uh good news bad news good news okay you want the good news or the bad news first Jeffrey bad news bad always uh Jeffrey you're fucking fired excellent you've had a good run uh appreciate everything you haven't done but uh see you later buddy get the fuck out of here good news is
Speaker: Uh, actually, Jeff, you're not fired, but we, uh, we, we did, uh, I extended the offer for Connor to not be a guest anymore, but to be a full -on member of the show and gave him admin rights so he can do.
Speaker: the brand whatever you want in the show. Yeah, he doesn't need to be invited anymore. He can just bring his own happy answer. He can do that. Yeah, it's fun once you get the toys, buddy. I don't know how to take it back down, though. Click on it again. Oh, it says hide when I do it. OK. Yeah, it's fun, isn't it?
Speaker: Wait, wait till you get playing with the videos and stuff. That's even more fun. Just don't hover over your trackpad and accidentally click like Chris. Chris does all the time. Yeah. He's got the most sensitive trackpad I've ever seen. He's like, I'm getting ready to set this up on Blake. And then it just starts playing. He's like, God damn it.
Speaker: This is a message to all the haters out there. If you don't like what I do, but you watch everything I'm doing, you're still a fan. Point one. It's true. My track is super sensitive. Better. I just have really fat, heavy fingers. And I'll be sitting there talking and not realize that I'm hovering over something. And I just relax my hand. And when I do, it's like, oh, yes, we're doing that. You said you might have fat fingers. That's what she said.
Speaker: That is, I'm, I'm mad that somebody else took the office from me. Now we don't have to change the bio anymore. It's all part of a plan. I just have to change the picture because our YouTube profile picture is still our Dudley boys. Yeah. Yeah. Connor, do me a favor. Send me a headshot selfie.
Speaker: don't send him your dick again. Yeah, I don't need your dick because I'll I'll make a new I'll make a new one. Uh I'm sorry if that picture made you sad. We've been getting some complaints in the in the group chat. Well, unfortunately, my zoom, my zoom, I can't zoom in enough. So, it literally just looks like a fly on on the back of on the setting in a bush. So, you know,
Speaker: Shout out to our listeners. Yeah. Shout out to us, I guess. Thank you. Well, actually, thanks to our thank you to our listeners and everybody who enjoys listening to the show on whatever podcast platform that you that you listen on or or whatever the case may be. And there's four of them. So like like we still get notifications like you're on it more like I didn't even know that existed.
Speaker: When you put when we put them up on Suncaster, it goes on to like 400. Yeah, it goes well, it doesn't it doesn't go up to the main ones. It's on Zincaster. It's on Spotify. It's on Apple. It's on Google. Those are the main ones. And I'm fucking sexy. But find that very hard to win. Oh, shit. I want that. I don't know. Check your snap, Jeff. Tell me you don't get it.
Speaker: I'm a little bit behind on posts and shows and I apologize to our replay listeners. Uh, I'm about 10 episodes behind. I'm going to start working on that tomorrow. Hopefully maybe I think, uh, try to get a couple episodes up and kind of throughout the week. Um,
Speaker: Plus, I'll have all I won't be here next weekend. If you guys want to do the show, do the show. We're going to P .A. for one of Nicki's best friend's birthdays. So I just I won't have very good Wi -Fi or anything like that. We'll be at her parents' house and I don't want to act a goddamn complete idiot at her parents. Oh, but I said.
Speaker: And you guys should. I am going to take my laptop with me so I can continue to get caught up and get episodes posted. But what I was trying to go with there was a shout out to our listeners. Thank you, guys. I can't believe that the numbers that we've hit. And I just want to show you guys something real quick here. I'll screen share it. Maybe I'll screen share it. There we go. So you see the little you see that number right over.
Speaker: the two 22 or no, that's, that's what, that's the, that's the listens just from today. Oh, that's today's downloads. Right. Right over, right over here. You see my little arrow. Oh my God. I can't, I got it. 22. Nice. That's like, what's that? That's like in like four months. Oh no, it's been about six months or so since.
Speaker: So it can break, I can break down the analytics for just today. And I haven't, as you see, I haven't posted any new episodes. And obviously today the 222 downloads are placed just today. Uh, last seven days, still no new episodes up. Yeah. And in the last month,
Speaker: I put up 12 episodes and we've gotten three thousand. That's pretty fucking cool. I mean, considering what we usually what we do, that's kind of impressive. That just shows you a lot of like minded people out there. I'm just saying a lot of people with fourth grade senses and humor. I'd like to see what our most listened to episode is. I think it's I think it's fun and funeral.
Speaker: I think what I think that's on the Spotify No, I can Because you can actually when you go on Spotify, I think it shows Most downloaded episode. Yeah, they don't track our they don't track our analysis The only number that matters is zero dollar earned Yeah
Speaker: I mean, I don't know why it says that. Well, I mean, people are a lot of people are going back and listening to the old shit. Yeah. Oh, yeah. And back when we back when you guys only did two hour episodes, three hour episodes. Yeah, I'd like to say that half hour.
Speaker: Every time I do mention it to somebody, I always tell them, you know, if you really want to lose your mind laughing, the episode Chris and I talked about what to do and the other's death, oh my God, we laugh so hard. Like we almost killed each other laughing so hard. I'll kill you for fun. And then of course, the other episode that gets a lot of listens to is, and I have to scroll down to it.
Speaker: It's it's like episode 15 or 18 or something like that where we talked about our love for Ryan Reynolds and Kevin Costner We started the hashtag we started the hashtag
Speaker: I said a lot, Jarvis, a lot. I got into a lot of. At least I started getting notifications because, you know, I, I, I have access to email and admin and all that shit. And I look literally I'm lying in bed watching TV and I start getting notifications. You've been kicked from YouTube. I said, well, there's one. There's two. I was like, yeah.
Speaker: somebody's doing something right let's be honest people are generally sexually they don't need to tell everyone yeah that's why you never hear me say it doesn't just because you don't say it doesn't make you attractive doesn't make it true yeah i mean once again if the shoe fits then i must wear it and it doesn't it doesn't fit so
Speaker: If the group's fit. If the group's fit. If the group's in the Daisy Dukes fit, then sassy yo ass right on down the street. Yeah, there you go. Sassy. Do you have your, do you have your microphone on? We haven't made it, but you haven't said anything or. No, I muted his shit. Yeah, we. He's on. He has, I think he's been waiting for a chance to speak. And we can't hear you.
Speaker: Yeah. Turn your mic on. Yeah. He's he's on Twitch. There we go. There it is. Hey, hey. I had to bring out my token PC cuz my CPU cooler on my little PC took a shit the other night. So, good time. Well, I was trying to figure it out cuz earlier when Jeff was talking, I saw you like moving your lips and looking at the camera and I was like, I don't think he knows that we can't hear him at all.
Speaker: I'm glad y 'all said something. He's like, why don't y 'all this? This was, this was me. Jeff just kind of wrote you off. I, I, I knew cause I pay attention cause I, I'm that kind of guy. I was just going to let it go all night and then wait for him to mess with me tomorrow. You guys, but you're an asshole. I tried talking to you. I hate the bad news, Connor.
Speaker: But now you're an admin, so you're guilty by association. That's right. That's right. Right. But I'm supposed to be the redeeming feature of shit. Minus the racist jokes. I didn't get that memo when I heard you. Let's be honest. Let's be honest here.
Speaker: Did you guys see in the news though? They worked like dimmers, all right? That group of people in Alabama managed to steal a 200 -foot tall radio. I didn't see that! Yes, in one night. I saw that. I was going to break it up. Okay, so this town, Chris, you know the towers we were talking about that I told you I'll give you a billion dollars if you go in that tower and change the light? Somebody stole a 200 -foot one.
Speaker: And nobody knows where it went. How do you feel it? Yeah, exactly. Like, you've got to have at least a 300 ton crane, enough trucks to haul the motherfucker out, but they never left a trace. Zero trace. How? How? It's all. Bro, it's Alabama, right? No, I know how. There's your culprit right there.
Speaker: He has an airtight alibi. He was with me drinking beer. Speaking of alibis, I know Chris probably didn't watch it. Did anybody watch the Tucker Carlson Putin interview? I did not. Oh my God. Oh my God. It's brilliant.
Speaker: at one point, Tucker Carlson asked Putin, he says, who blew up the North Sea pipeline? And he goes, Putin looks like him and he looks around and goes, you? And Tucker's like, I had an alibi. He's like, well, not you, but you may have an alibi, but your CIA doesn't. And I went, oh, shit. But then Tucker was like, well, if you have
Speaker: and you know what
Speaker: Listening to Connor's favorite person, Joe Biden, and listening to Putin, you can tell who's senile and who's not, because Putin is fucking, he's just on point. I mean, granted it was in Russian, but he's not um, and slurring words, he's just on point. He tells the history of Russia at one point. So you're not telling him he's not.
Speaker: since the creation of a trip to figure it out. Yeah, exactly. It was brilliant. I watched the entire two hours. But facts got dropped and I was just like, oh, I'm sitting here living here watching on my phone going, oh, shit. Jeff gets excited for politics like like I do for football. Exactly. But he dropped names. He dropped names.
Speaker: Bush Senior's name, Bush Junior, Bill Clinton. He's dropping names like you read him going like, well, he, like, he was like, Russia asked to join NATO. And Tucker's like, wait, you guys did? He said, yeah, we got rejected because of Clinton. And I was like, Oh, shit. I want to see Hillary go after that man. Oh, she started talking shit already.
Speaker: I've really, well, no, I mean, I want to see her try to put him in a hole like she has everyone else's talk. Yeah. Good luck with that. Right. Good luck. Well, there was a football player who won the Super Bowl, met Putin. And Putin's like, can I put on the ring? And the football player's like, yeah, go ahead and try it on. Putin puts it on and walks away. And dude's like, hey, my ring. And his security is like, yeah, it's not going to happen, dude. You just lost that ring.
Speaker: So, it's got a Super Bowl ring. I'm coming back. The football players just said, they're like, mother, dude, what the **** And they're like, yeah, you're not getting it back. America, where we shoot deers with ease through thick and brush at four
Speaker: I'll be right back again. But I I did see that. I didn't see the thing about the tower listening and I was just like, how do how do you miss a tower? Yeah, that's that's that's pretty damn impressive that you're able to just steal a 200 foot tower and just well, nobody noticed the guys that stole that bridge.
Speaker: Yeah, we talked about it. Yeah, this is Ohio. They stole like 150 foot brick. It was in the back door. Again, I want to know how they executed these things. Well, my thought won that tower to Chevy Pinto and hooked a chain around it and her loss. Yeah, let's be honest. I mean, a cutting torch and a couple of grinders, you can cut that shit down. Yeah, but you're not cutting out a 200 foot radio or radio. Yeah.
Speaker: with a with a **** grinder and a torch. I mean, what are you going to do? You cut it down and then it falls. So, if a radio tower in the woods and no one's around, does it make a noise? Apparently not. Yeah. But I saw that like it's like a satellite, you know, the the cell cell towers like that. Good stuff. Just it's gone. I'm just saying you want to find it. Go to your local scrap yard.
Speaker: I guarantee it's already there because somebody was looking for beer money. Yeah. Oh, it's like it's like that that TikTok video. Don't be suspicious. Don't be suspicious. As he's grabbing the tower in his pocket. Let's get here, folks. He's slowly dragging it through the woods. I'm just saying, you know, you get a couple of pickups, you can just take the fuck off.
Speaker: Chris, you've been at towers where we used to go mud running. It's hard to see one of them towers. You said timber. I'm just saying. How do you even see timber on Scott's action? Just the way she just wrote it. I didn't see that. I saw that today and I was like, you know what?
Speaker: Well, you didn't come in me no you didn't come in me
Speaker: He's supposed to be the equivalent of me Chris's list is absolute shite Shit it is fucking terrible. So how much should he pay you?
Speaker: Exactly. How much is he sucking you off, dude? It is not. There's no fucking shot. Your list is ass. Well, in your opinion, that's what you think. But the masses. Oh, you got a couple of votes already. However, yes, let's let's let's talk about it for now. Hey, my rosy. Shall we? Mute him. Jesus. I got it. There you go. Mute his ass.
Speaker: uh let's talk about the let's talk about the voting shall we uh michael michael and michael i'm gonna go beg for fucking votes people that i did not beg are voting for you for u .s crowds because first i put it up on my page first and foremost yeah yeah yeah i put it up on my page and i didn't say anything to anybody that's why the entire country of mexico is all of a sudden randomly voting for chat and utah and utah
Speaker: Yeah, yeah. And then Connor. Fucking everybody's list is bullshit. Help me humble Gligg because he's gay.
Speaker: but not to be done by the originator of going and trying to plot and scheme and get votes underhandedly. Michael himself is sending, I'm not talking about you, Jeffrey, you know who I'm talking about. I'm talking about Michael himself sending his minions of old seconds to vote for him. They don't look at the list. They are not reading the list. They're not even following us.
Speaker: I haven't seen any votes for him. I literally shared your post on my Facebook so that when somebody voted it would go right to that link.
Speaker: So it would show up all in the same place. Leggy, go for me while she's not. I'll get that in the mail. Just make sure I get it back after a couple of weeks. I didn't realize that was a thing.
Speaker: from Edinburgh, oh wait. She's gonna, she's gonna hop, she's gonna hop to that festival. Go onto my Facebook page. Unvote for me here. Show these American fox who they are. Well, I haven't asked anybody to vote for me either. I just threw the list up there. It's on Instagram, Twitter. With your picture.
Speaker: I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ. I'm the champ.
Speaker: Yes. Smells like a fear. Smells like fear. Oh, fear. Fear of losing. Fear of losing. Yes. Fear of losing. That'll never happen. My last count, I have 13 and you're six. What? My last count, I have 13 and you're six. What did you learn to count at? I just counted them today. There's four likes. One of those likes is me. Let's be honest.
Speaker: Where? Uh, where you put the names, where people are going to like the name. I have four. Can you tell me Jeffrey, Jesus Christ. I know it's on the fucking Facebook on that post on that. The only thing I shared out was the post. So that's that post on Facebook. That's the only place I literally so that anybody votes, it goes right to that.
Speaker: because there's on that. I put it up on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and I haven't even I haven't seen those and and and TikTok. Oh, OK. I haven't seen it. Let's see where you. On the Facebook post.
Speaker: He knows drugs. He don't know. It's okay. The starting five is back. The champ is ready to defend his title. Yeah, I put it. I put a picture of myself holding my belt because I was with the whole purpose of the whole reason I bought the goddamn belt and declared myself the champ was from whooping your guys's ass.
Speaker: You can't. You know what they say. I had to change the rules because these fucking idiots were trying to be sneaky and they didn't realize that when they voted for themselves, I get the fucking notifications that says Jeff like comment for Jeff. Mike like comment for Mike. Blah, blah, blah. I'm like, oh my god. Well, I'm sorry. Of course I like my own because that's why I picked mine. So
Speaker: or and i'm sorry i've never seen american horror story so so my second would probably be connor honestly except for the domer thing i don't domers not a bad series i like it's not bad but it wasn't it's not something i want to watch 14 times
Speaker: Yeah, you're god damn right. He is rip god damn right. He is looser Alright, I gotta hide that cuz cuz we yeah your English words are hard. We get it You're sore after you get loose Yeah, so it's on Facebook it's
Speaker: Jeff has four, eight. Numbers are hard. It's OK. He'll get to two different places. There's the actual photo and then the actual post. Yeah. And I've got I've got three there. And then you have like four on the other. And I got to go over here.
Speaker: It's not showing anything over here. Well, yeah, because everybody's actually going to the actual post. Yeah. Hold on a second. Let me. Yeah, everybody's going to the actual post, which is what I wanted them to do. I wanted to push them. Right. Well, unfortunately, people are voting on the photo as well. Instagram, Jeff has no votes. Leggy has a vote. Tony has a vote, which is his own self.
Speaker: Uh, Connor has no votes. This is where Mike was begging for votes and everybody was coming to vote for him. He has seven. Uh, I have three there. So we're pretty much tied. Six. Uh, lady has a vote. Nobody, I have three there. Sorry. Two. Two.
Speaker: Yeah. Glick, you're a silly sausage. And well, I was going to ask you guys, but. Fucking hell, man, man alive. Everything is fucking hard tonight, apparently. Yeah, I actually I'm not included in that. Maybe I did put it on Twitter. I thought I put it on Twitter.
Speaker: I didn't see it on Twitter. Maybe that's what I need to start doing. Like he's offering like a dollar for every boat. Oh, there you go. There you go. That's what she said. Well, let's work on till Wednesday. I can I can throw it up there. Yeah. Oh, you know what?
Speaker: I was trying to and it wouldn't fucking go. It like it kept saying. You found. No, it kept it kept saying the champions losing, so he quit. You're going to sit there and tell me I have no votes, Chris. I didn't say that. Actually, no, you have a couple. Did I say that one? He was talking to one about the entire Tony has won throughout the entire split.
Speaker: leggy's got two i have 13 chris has roughly about 13 14 something like that and mike has like four dicks or something and i've got like two yeah well i think your wife and your mother -in -law yeah oh that's fucked up yeah you gotta start sucking more dick dude i'm sorry okay i don't know maybe not your mother -in -law maybe just some other guy but uh nonetheless his male side piece
Speaker: That's Chris. Come on now. That's every weekend side piece. Yeah. I had a weekday. Fail to send. I'd say. What? Yeah, Twitter's weird like that. Twitter's been an absolute fucking nightmare lately. Yeah, I just can't believe Chris has some really...
Speaker: that's
Speaker: Ain't no curve left or right. That bitch just looks like an arrow. It's not a little baby fade off to the right. It's straight as an arrow. Nice slice. All right.
Speaker: Unfortunately, I'll be right back again. I'm babysitting kids tonight. I was going to say, who lost that bet? Apparently fucking me with my ex. I was about to say, dude. Yeah, so I got to go. Now, do your thing, buddy. Nyquil works every time.
Speaker: Yeah, but it's not close faster. The movie myth we've discussed of chloroform reacting super fast. It actually takes like three minutes. Do not. Just put that rag over my face. My face for so long. Uh I thought it would work. Oh, I'm getting kind of tired. Oh, are you?
Speaker: Yeah, why? No reason. I don't know. Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it. If you wake up and your toes are wet, don't worry about it. Just enjoy. Just enjoy. It's gonna happen one way or another. Just let it happen.
Speaker: I was going for it at the same time. I saw it. And yeah, you clicked on it at the same time I did. That's the only problem. Chris and I occasionally do the same thing. We'll both go to hit something and the other will hit it. It literally just knocks it down. It will not let me post that on Twitter. That's weird. You can't even like put the Facebook link on there.
Speaker: No, I probably I probably could, but I mean like. It's not letting me create a post. We have 20 ,000 plays and probably a total of what 30 people 40 people have voted. Well, that's that's the problem with with that. I think that was one of the things that we were running into with starting five is yeah, you could put it out there.
Speaker: but the views of the the actual starting five are minuscule because you also you also you also have to remember i'm 10 episodes behind that episode exactly so so the people that could vote can't because they don't even know it's happening i mean we have almost a thousand followers on
Speaker: Um, on Instagram, we have over a thousand on, on, on Twitter, if I can get it to post, we've got, you know, 600 or something like that on Facebook. We've got like 4 ,000 or something on, on Tik TOK. It's just, it's hard to get engagement. You know, you try to do something and you're not getting the full on engagement and like some, when we first, when we first started the starting vibe, we were thought we were going to win and lose by a couple hundred.
Speaker: But it turned out to be five, one or two. Yeah, we've had a couple that have gotten like, you know, a couple hundred votes or whatever, but it's not most of them in all honesty. It's like 40 or 50 votes at the end of the day. We're lucky if somebody gets 20 votes. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. I mean, people like I'll put a video up on TikTok and people will like it and whatnot. And never watch a single second of it. Yeah.
Speaker: Or, you know, like I said, you know, fucking Mike will go, Oh, I'm going to start a five. You got to go vote for me. So I win. And they don't even look at the, people don't even look at the list. They got, that's how he got caught was because like in a matter of like three minutes, he got 20 votes on TikTok at one point in time. And I went and looked the analytics of the video and the most watched time on the video was like two seconds. That doesn't even allow you to get to the list because I used to put like a little something in front of it or like, I'm like,
Speaker: a talk me talking or, or I would do a slide show. Yeah. It'll be like a slideshow. So you weren't even watching the video long enough to see the list. Yeah. You were dropping in there. And like I said, and they came so fast that it was like, yeah. That is what she said. We're in there.
Speaker: Enough fast enough yet. So, I mean, it's, you know, it's, it's just one of those things. Plus it also comes with the fact that outside of the show, we're not that super active on social media, but we are not as much as we should be. We're just not. I tried to, but Jeff's lazy fucking just won't do anything other than turn his camera on and talk on his microphone. Let's be honest. Facts.
Speaker: about your feelings or like, or like, Hey, Jeff, get that clip from, from me having my full on blonde moment and send it to me so I can post it onto our social media. What's he do? He posted access to our social media. He's still posted on his. Well, it's close. Tell me how you really feel. Are you upset?
Speaker: No, I'm not. I tagged you. What more do you want? The only reason he tagged me was so I could go and get the video and save it for myself and then post it myself like I wanted to do anyways. Yeah. But it pops up the algorithm because he's already posted the video. So when I post it, TikTok sees it as a video that's already up or in similar fashion. So it fucks up our algorithm.
Speaker: And that's what I try to tell it. I'm like, just, if you don't want to post it on our social media, send it to me. Well, honestly, I need to actually put in your number to get re -access to our social, to our TikTok. Because if I sign in through our email, I get another TikTok.
Speaker: I tagged you guys on Instagram. It wouldn't let, obviously I didn't post Twitter. Facebook is really weird on that page with me trying to tag people. And I wasn't, I don't know if I tagged anybody on TikToker or not. I can't remember, but it did at the end of the day. It don't matter. These knuckles aren't going to do anything with it when they're tagged.
Speaker: other than go beg people. I honestly. The whole point is we want to vote on the list that they like best, not you begging for votes. I'm going to beg for votes for Jeff if I have to. If it means that we take you down because you suck, then yeah.
Speaker: How many people have you put in your mouth? How many people have you fellatiated? I fired on him one time because he started popping off at the mouth.
Speaker: and talking about, well, you put it on social media, blah, blah, blah. Yeah. We're going to like our stuff. Yeah. We're going to ask for votes because you have more followers than all of us. And I'm like, it's on the podcast, social media, not my personal personal. You assholes are the only ones putting it on your personal social media. Ask him for help. That's why we changed the rules to, yeah, go ahead and put it on your social media whenever I don't fucking care. And then one time, Tony won. So.
Speaker: So I put it I put it on my social media I put it on my tiktok page and I fucking blew these assholes out of the water Close to sniffing and I was like, there you go Now you got your wish now you now you see why I don't put it on my social media because it has nothing to do with my personal social media I Just want to know how many people you've fellatiated. That's all I want to know. I just want a number I
Speaker: Nobody because I just put the list out there and I just think alone. I don't have to ask for votes. I just see for all of them. Even the people who voted for you, it was just for fun at that point, though. That was not for fun. That was pure like, all right, we got it. Joy. Yeah. I'm just for the fun. I added you guys.
Speaker: Yeah. So you guys should have got notifications that I posted it. I think I'm going to go through it. He's on the actual picture. That's crazy. That's just a pain in the ass to try to do. Yeah, I see it now. But nine likes. Oh, now you go for it.
Speaker: Then I was just like, I was like, yeah, we'll just put it on social media. I don't care. But I refrain from putting it on like my TikTok and, and stuff like that, because I don't want people to just vote just because they know me and they like me. I don't want them to vote for me for that. I want like legit list to be picked like people to pick the legit list. Like read the list. You know, it's almost, you know, what we, what we could do is, is the next one we do, we don't put our names.
Speaker: Yeah. Just leave it colored. And then you pick the color you like. And we know who's got what color. Or number, or. Or number, yeah. That way it's fair, because. Actually. Yeah, and the only problem with that is, once again, Mike would be like, pick blue, pick blue, pick blue. Yeah, I mean, that was just a, I didn't expect for Mike.
Speaker: Mike and Tony to show up and take part. I didn't, that was nowhere. That was random. It's not that important to me. I just, you know, if we're going to do it, if we're going to do it, and that's why I got it. And that's one of the reasons, the biggest reason that I just decided I didn't want to do it anymore because it wasn't fun because we, you know, at least do be legit about it. Don't fucking beg for votes. And, you know, we put it out because we were trying to engage our follower. We were trying to engage our followers.
Speaker: at the end of the day, we were trying to engage with our followers. I mean, you got people that are not, that don't watch the show, don't listen to the show, don't follow us on social media, none of that, that were, yeah, it's like, you don't even, you don't even know anything about our show. I mean, so I'm looking at the list right now.
Speaker: And if I had to give a vote, and this is like the bias situation here. If I had to give a vote, I'm not going to lie. Jeff has better picks for one.
Speaker: my answer is going to be the same. Yeah. I already said Chris. Okay. Okay. You know, whatever makes you sleep better at night but I think in all honesty, I think Chris's downfall is is the the
Speaker: Now, I like Boys Beats World. I like American Horror Story. I like a lot of Chris's, but at the same time, I'm a supernatural person. Supernatural for me. And you know what? I 100 % blame Chris and Mike for that shit because these fuckers got me hooked on it. And next thing you know, I watched the entire season twice. Yeah. All episodes. It's a great series. Hands down.
Speaker: I gotta say, I gotta agree with you. It came back, I think Jeff has the best list on there. Now, Dahmer, on your case, I love watching Dahmer. Dahmer was a great series for me as well. I liked it. That's the only one of Connor's that I don't agree with because I love Big Bang Theory. I love houses. I like it.
Speaker: But watching again for the first time, yeah, I'm good. See, but now like my cat Yellowstone and Peaky Blinders, I like both of those and the office. Yeah, but I don't even what the offer is. It's a Godfather documentary. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. This is the second time Chris has had to remind me what the fuck it is. Yeah. You know, but I don't I don't I don't care about whether like I
Speaker: it's just about, you know, I like talking shit at the end of the day. I don't care. Plus, I'm like, God damn times. If I lose one, it's not the end of the day. Right. I mean, Tom Brady went to like 12 Super Bowls and won seven of them. It's not. It doesn't make him any less of a winner because he didn't win all of them.
Speaker: Well, I mean, let's be honest here. There may have been some inflation issues there. It was deep. Chris thinks he's in the same. Chris thinks he's in the same wheelhouse as Tom Brady. Let's be honest. I mean, I'm one of the greatest champions of all time. There's I'm tied with the New York Yankees for the most championships ever. So, I mean.
Speaker: The delusion is just, you know, champs, no chance. All right. Y 'all inter intervention time for Chris. All right. We should all express Arkansas. We've been trying to find that ashes to ashes. Like, you know, I looked, I looked, I could not find it. I, it's not like even, even the other one that's that the, the one she was talking about, the, the original.
Speaker: that references ashes lashes I could not find on Amazon either the only place I can find it I was on that website I said you know Tony not the porn website the other way Jesus Christ Chris I'm not gonna lie or not Chris see it looks like your kids got a fucking mullet going I'm not gonna lie cute as fuck so she had a I know but it still looks like a mullet but it's good as hell
Speaker: She had pigtails in all day, so her hair. Yeah, it's all stuck. Crazy. A little crazy. She's got crazy hair. She's got a pair of pimp vipers and a squatted dime and she's ready to go.
Speaker: I saw a clip today where it was Peter from Family Guy. He's like, oh, I'm good and ready to go to this game. I better get my Oakley on. And he's like, Oakley's around the neck. Oakley's on top of the shades. Oakley's behind my neck. And he's like, and he says, and Ray -Bans for my eyes, because Oakley's suck. I was like, you know what? It's a Bitpiper, so it's so much better. OK, so there's a lot of crime in America.
Speaker: Here's the kicker, though. Prime is different based on region. You are in the UK, so it may be on your Prime. It's not on ours. It's not on mine. It may be on Chris's and Carter, but it's not on mine because I'm in Mexico. Well, that explains a lot. It's the only way I could get it on Prime is if I got a VPN. Ashes to ashes. British Adirabana. Did you find it? Since it's on Prime.
Speaker: It says it says it on my YouTube. I googled as well, but I couldn't find it on prime. But I wanted to watch the other one. I can't remember what it's called. Yeah, yeah. You got to get the free trial of Brit box. And I just and I looked it up. I might have looked it up the other night. We were talking about it. We did. You did. So it's actually is on prime. But yeah, it's it's it's supposed to be really good.
Speaker: You just have to have the like like you said the free trial. Well, I don't I don't have American Prime. I have Mexico Prime. She feels my pain. She's yelling at you, jackass. She's yelling at you, you jackass. Michael Mars. Yeah, sorry. I don't have the chat up. I have to be paying attention.
Speaker: Let's be honest. I'm playing with pictures. As always, nothing less expected from you. All right. I've got to go tell my kids, go ahead. I'll be back. All right. It's not like we're in the middle of a show or anything. Excuse me for having a family. That he cares about. That he cares about. I haven't even got the milk yet.
Speaker: Are you implying we don't? Just like came back that it's not one that you care about, apparently. It's almost nine o 'clock. My kids are in bed. Yeah, I'm always playing. Yeah, I'm sure your kids are in bed. My kids are in bed by six and if they're not in bed watching TV. Yeah, they'll still walk in and open door 47 times.
Speaker: Oh no, no, my kids get melatonin before bed. Fucking hell, like why? Nope, we don't play that shit in my house. Fuck that. That's the kicker. So the kids TV and my TV that we have in the bedrooms, they're the same brand of TV. So one remote will work for both. Well, they broke their remote. So they keep stealing my remote. And I'm up late watching TV and shit.
Speaker: And I'll go to turn it off and I'm like, where the fuck's my remote? But then all of a sudden I hear fucking YouTube and kids laughing at two o 'clock in the morning and I kick in the door. What the fuck?
Speaker: How do you turn the TV on and find something underwater without the remote why are you just finding out that you're Okay, so when you go on I want the truth you son of a bitch If I'm watching a series
Speaker: You press play, you set the fucking remote down, and as the next one comes, it does. It's on its own. Fucking kids like little ninjas, they just pop in. Don't wait until I get up to take a piss. I'll go to the bathroom, take a piss, and they'll come in. Your kids might be a lot of things. One thing they are not is fucking quiet.
Speaker: But either is when he takes a piss. So I mean, it's understandable. But I also have I have a I have a Wi -Fi remote on my phone as well. So I can use that if I have to. Stealth mode. I'm an app. I'm an app for everything. What do you need the remote for? That's what I'm saying. What is this, Samsung TV? No, it's Roku. Oh.
Speaker: I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it. I got it.
Speaker: like a comedy remote like it really works but it's more it's just yeah monster for no reason actually I feel like I'm in church because that is one holy ass story you're going Joe isn't that big oh my god it's just a regular fucking one I've ever this is the one I replaced it with which they broke as well I couldn't tell with all the fucking keypads missing there right
Speaker: Shoot your kids with paintball guns, Jeff. Hey, Jeff, maybe if you feed your kids a little more, they wouldn't try to eat your fucking remotes, bud. No, no. Now, I don't know about you guys, but the back of the remote. Do you does anybody have the back? Yeah. I don't have a single one. Can't find a single one. All fucking gone. For fucking remotes all missing the backs.
Speaker: It's not even that big of a remote. It's a normal size **** remote. Like that's the replacement remote. The **** six foot remote control. You want that's a replacement for the replacement. Alright. Here's the remote. Look how huge this thing is. This thing is massive.
Speaker: Look at that. It's getting up the whole screen. It's so big. Ali fucking Napoleon over here. It's huge to me. It's big to me. I don't know. I have one remote that operates four TVs in my house. Jeff's kids are like goddamn Tasmanian devils. You know what? You know the remote that I have that operates my TV? It's not even the remote for my TV.
Speaker: It's my old Xfinity cable remote that I had down in Charlotte, the remote's older than the fucking TV. Yeah, so it works. This is the remote that came with it, but both, like Jeff said, my TVs are both Vizio. So that's what I lost. I actually lost the remote for this TV. So I have this one back in my bedroom because like I said, they're both Vizio. Well, I bought, I have
Speaker: what, four or five TVs in the house and I buy the Roku TV because they're cheap. I get them for like 200 bucks. I get them like 200 bucks. You might be. Yeah, that's what I said for me. It's huge. I was going to say, well, on that note, like I think for my like seventy five inch I got from my main living room. Right. I think I ended up paying like three eighty nine for that motherfucker.
Speaker: Well, I got mine they have every year they have like a black friday sale, but it's it's called bien fin Which means good weekend and it's they have like a it's everything's like half off and it was right as the big Fuck off TVs came out and I bought that one. I got it for half price So I only paid like 300 bucks for it where normal price was like 675 or some shit like that and
Speaker: When we we bought it two weeks before we moved into this house nice and Everything else I bought for the house. I bought these fucking Roku TVs Because they're stupid cheap and they work Everything you want. Yeah. Well, yeah us anyway. Yeah like the the Samsung we didn't realize it was smart until I
Speaker: we disconnected the PlayStation from it, because we literally had all the streaming channels on the PlayStation. Right. So we just use the PlayStation all the time. The only thing we use the remote for was to turn it up and turn it down and turn it on and off. That's all it is. It's just Jeff, man. Now, those Roku TVs, the TV I have here in the office, I bought for like 150 bucks. Right. And then
Speaker: The TV we had in our old house was Roku. We put that in the kids room. And then I have, uh, no leggy. It's not only 50 inches. I promise. Well, that's the case. Mine's a hundred inches. That way you can take your 25 away from it. It's called grounding Jesus.
Speaker: Half of six. I don't even know what we paid for the TV. I mean, I'm pretty sure half of 675 is not 300. I don't know what they're like. It was discounted and I was like, I'll take it. Cause when you, when you buy a house, the way we bought a house here, you actually get a,
Speaker: You get the loan from the house, but you also get a loan to get new stuff like, you know, stuff to deck out your kitchen and shit like that. Well, we had everything for the kitchen. So we bought a washer and dryer. We bought the fucking TV. That was it. Nice. All right. I'm going to do something. It's just so happy to be on that that cheap. Pimpin. What is it called? Pimpin?
Speaker: What PMT what are you talking about what the hell is your black Friday code would you say it was Oh Bien Finn I'll be in Finn. Yeah, it means good weekend It's good end but end is weekend And it goes from Friday to Monday
Speaker: So she had a real good end if you don't know me. Oh my God. Your math ain't math and man. And what are you gonna do? Oh, I didn't even I just said I'll take that one because it's half off.
Speaker: I don't remember what it cost. I mean, it was like four or five years ago. And I got to get a new one because for some reason after so much time, it's slowly turning black. Like part of the screen is not working. I think it's slowly dying. So nobody uses it anymore. It's just the Samsung. How long have you had it? Like five years.
Speaker: Yeah, you've got a good run out of it. Yeah, that's why I said I said fucking I'll get a new one So as soon as I have a good week, I'll go get me another I'll get me another Roku like I got in the bedroom and I had an LG I bought it when we first it was 60 inch that I bought when we first moved to South Carolina Like the day we got there I bought it and I got about I got about Seven eight years out of it
Speaker: Yeah. And then one day the screen just went like the kids were down there watching TV. It's like, I would say the first, like if you break the TV up in quarters,
Speaker: a quarter of it is is you can see it, but you you got to squint, you know, it's it's it's not fully lit. Yeah. No, it's just the LEDs or something like that went out of it. So like the TV would still come on. You could hear the TV and everything. It was just a black full black screen. Yeah. Well, I wasn't upset because I got you know, I got more than my money's worth out of the television and and everything like that. It was in my garage to me like not that it got super good at Charleston, but it was in my garage.
Speaker: Well, humidity, this 60 inch or whatever, 60 or 55. I can't remember what that one is. This one was in my living room, the ones in my bedroom now. So I just went out to Walmart and I, I already liked the Visio brand. I think it's a really good TV. Um, no, we had to buy this one because the one that I put in the basement, 60 or 65, I can't remember.
Speaker: wouldn't fit. There was like a, there was like a space above the cubby. Yeah. Cubby is above the fireplace in my house in Charleston. So I had to buy this one. So my, my big one went down to the basement, this one in the living room. And then I just bought that new 75, but as a Visio, they're super cheap, but they're great. Well, I mean, like this, this one I have here in the office is JVC.
Speaker: and it's great and it works off the Roku platform and and then we JVC go bring back the cathode ray tube. Oh, she's just she's in those big flat screen TVs of the back is is the back of a station wagon. So as long as they never bring back the trinitrons. Yeah, fucking 22 inch trinitron weighs 943 pounds. It's ridiculous.
Speaker: You got a 40 seconds and it takes four minutes and a boy to move that goddamn TV out. I saw it. There's a YouTuber. He bought the largest TV you could buy. And he had to import it from China. It's 112 inch. And they couldn't get out of the truck. I feel like I could go to Best Buy and get one bigger.
Speaker: I, I, well, see, that was my thing too. I was like, you know what? That doesn't sound very big. Let me see. Now I'm curious. What was the, I want one of those ones, the little panels that you keep seeing on TikTok and shit where the guy pops in a panel and it, you know, or it's upside down. He pops it and it's a little squares like this big and you put them all together and you got one big screen. I want one of those.
Speaker: I want a wall like they have an avatar where the guy is four feet from it, but it takes up the entire fucking wall So right now the biggest Samsung TV you can buy is 85 inch
Speaker: That's what I that's what I was saying because I can get a projector for like 150 bucks. Yeah, that's like Just when you can get there is 90 100. Yeah. Well, it's best buys best buy comm literally says 100 inch TV Yeah, a hundred hundred inch Is a game changer?
Speaker: the the
Speaker: It costs anywhere. Well, that's a weird price range. The price range on it is $6 ,000 to $25 ,000. Holy fuck. So if you get the 65, it's $6 ,000. If you get the $160 ,000, it's $25 ,000.
Speaker: They're great TV. Don't get me wrong. Like I think they're a fantastic TV. I loved them but Jesus **** Christ. They were so god damn unnecessarily heavy. My my my ex wife's grandma before she passed away. She had I think it was a 4847 inch TV something like that and it's right. We had you know, the family got together and upgraded and got her a flat screen one year for Christmas or a birthday or whatever. That's
Speaker: I mean, I want, I just need to come up with 25 grand boys. Yeah. My ex -wife's uncle and I, we had to take that fucking trailer because she wanted to put it in the basement and like, they had like shared like a,
Speaker: like a little, I don't know, family room, whatever you want to call it in the basement. And that's right. Right. Also, man, that fucking thing about damn near fucking killed us, man. When I worked at, you know, we used to have to move and we put them on those little four wheel dollies. And I shit you not. There's a wooden four wheel dolly. You know, it's like a square that you would put it on there and the fucking thing would bow because of their TVs were so heavy. It's just like, yeah, I mean, no system.
Speaker: So on prime, you can buy a 97 inch OLED G2 smart TV, $24 ,996 .99. I'm good. No, he's actually, instead of just spouting off nonsense, which I tell him all the time, just look it up before you say it. That way you're not dropping 14 different numbers going 112. Actually it's 156. No, I literally saw the video like, like a month ago.
Speaker: And these guys were like, we bought the largest TV and they couldn't get it out of the truck. Like it showed up in a box truck and like it, it, it, you know how the, the, those box trucks have the, the hydraulic lift. If they put it on the hydraulic lift, most of it was still in the truck. Well,
Speaker: There's your problem. Your box is too big and your Tommy gate don't work, right? Mark inside the fucking house. Right. Just just make the truck out of LG has a new 325 inch 8K TV. Why the fuck would you need an 8K TV? Jesus Christ. I don't have 325 inches of wall.
Speaker: I mean, I've got 325 inches of wall but why would you need an 8K TV honestly? Well, here's the problem with that TV. 1 .7 million dollars. Jesus. Give me two. Yeah. Jesus Christ. I'll take three of them. It's called the wall. Clearly.
Speaker: She's still convinced that Jeff is is six foot nine and has a has a twelve inch dick. Realistically, he's four foot two and has a fourteen and a half centimeter dick. Hey, what can I say? Am I all of a salesman? It's a problem. That's a little bit of a problem. Your box is too big.
Speaker: Hey, you got to add a bigger box for extra padding to protect the package, right? That's usually what I say. Hey, you got a small winner. Maybe you just have a huge box or like throwing a hot dog down the hallway. Jesus. I might have, I might have a small dig, but I've said it before a tick, take a 90 mile an hour still hurts like a motherfucker. I'll tell you that much. Dude, those panel TVs, they're only like, Oh, wait a minute.
Speaker: Now you got this motherfucker on a kick of looking shit About an hour from now we'll be talking about something else and this answer was gonna interrupt everything just to talk about a TV
Speaker: He'll be like, oh my God, guys, I've got a 200 inch TV. I bought one. Yeah, I'm just going to sit here and let him let him go. I'm just wondering how much longer you can talk about tellies. I could all night long. It's all night. Here's the thing about TVs. When you're home by yourself, what do you end up? Oh, look at that. It's time for a break.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: maybe just say it. I want I want to watch the Super Bowl from a mile away. I was going to say this motherfucker wants to be able to put on a molecule from a half mile away. See the Super Bowl grass blades on his TV screen to be able to catch the names of the motherfuckers. You know, let's be honest. It's almost cheaper than actually going to the Super Bowl. That ain't no fucking joke. But a a 10 by 12 foot
Speaker: projection screen on the black out of back of his house that we watched football on and his neighbors across the pond were like, well, TV looks great. We could see it from the back porch. That's my thing is like, if you got an extra room in your house, just black out the window or block the window and make your own little home theater for like what? Two grand. Yeah. Thereabout. I honestly don't even think it would be that much because you can get to projection screen that you can go to fucking,
Speaker: Hobby Lobby or Michaels or whatever and buy the white, white canvas, white canvas. Yeah. Thank you. Uh, and, and you might wind up paying like $200. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's not much. I was going to say my bedroom actually has already has white walls in it. So yeah. It also comes down to like, if you decide to paint, then.
Speaker: I mean, you're going to have to go buy canvas. Yeah. No, I get that. Like I, my walls are all textured because they're concrete. So I would have to put up canvas. I'm just going to take the day. I mean, uh, you know, the projector is held. They're not very expensive at all at all anymore. I'm seeing those little ones. They're like, they're like little cubes and they're like a hundred bucks. There's actually both. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, I was gonna say I don't know how well they work or if they actually work I've never really I've yet to see one that actually worked But I've seen the videos Like my bedroom or my spare bedroom would be perfect for it because I'm a single dude I don't ever plan on doing any more to this house that I actually have to which means basically cleaning so um Yeah, the walls are just gonna stay the color of the walls are
Speaker: You know, I just kind of thought about a project. I wonder if my landlords would get pissed if I decided to project a movie or the side of the, because I read this big wall, like the side, like we're facing the parking lot. White wall outside. It's better to ask for forgiveness than beg for permission. That's right. I'm with you on that.
Speaker: neighborhood movie night. Hey, come on, kids. We're going to watch. We're going to watch. We're going to watch Rapunzel in actuality. We're going to watch. You little bastards. They got those they got those inflatable, you know, those bouncy houses. They got that inflatable projection. Yeah. But I was actually I was I want to build something like a projection screen by the pool.
Speaker: and watch Jaws while in the pool. I think we actually we would do they would do that. This guy, I just want to fuck with my kids. That's all I want to do. To be honest, to be hilarious. While they're swimming, come up underneath full of an earthquake. They did that in Charleston at Folly Beach. I saw that. Yeah, I had one of the completeable.
Speaker: projection screens and they uh they just anchored it into the water and then they you can get like you could either sit on the beach or you can get inner tubes and float in the water and one of the first movies they did was fucking jaw yeah yeah they did they did like
Speaker: And they did they did safe and then like once a month they would do an adult movie night where they would show like, you know, it'd be like raffy horror picture show or or, you know, some some, you know, you know, not a non -family friendly. Yeah, not family friendly. So I saw something on Instagram the other day in Egypt.
Speaker: every every once a year, they showed the mummy trilogy, the Brandon Fraser mummy trilogy on a giant screen by the pyramids. I was going to say that I was going to I was wondering where you're going. I was like, you know what? I'm 100 % in because you want to talk about like you're sitting in the sand where Brandon Fraser was going to buy, you know, I'm in. Well, you know, the great thing about going to the movies and going and seeing movies. Nothing.
Speaker: I always want to make sure you have something tasty to drink. Yeah, you do. I miss driving, driving. Especially if you know what I'm saying.
Speaker: I could steam roll one person. I don't need to steam roll two people. Jesus Christ. I'm working with fucking monkeys here. You got the guy flying monkeys from the Wizard of Oz that I work with. I swear to God. You know what? I don't even care. You know what? Just go to liquidiv .com and get liquid IV. Use our promo code, words are hard. We're gonna hire a creature. Okay, there you go.
Speaker: I work with morons. We love you, Chris. This idea wasn't to do this goddamn open door challenge and just like random ass people. I'm pretty sure that was you. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it was. Man, fuck you, Jersey. Yeah. Yeah, well, that's my show. New rule. Nobody's allowed on the show anymore. Get the asshole out of here. Get the asshole out of here. Get the asshole out of here. Get the asshole out of here.
Speaker: one bad apple ruins it for everybody. We've had good guests to the K mag just comes up here. Oh, fuck you. Fuck you, Jersey. However, we are going to take a break real quick because I need to piss and I want to get something to drink. Oh.
Speaker: I can't stop to before. I mean, I can't just to run this show without me because I'll come back and Jeff will be talking about goddamn movie cars. Hey, well, I mean, it's happened. Don't look like it's happened. And it's interesting. At least it's interesting, right? You're saying what we usually talk about is an interesting that's something to say came back.
Speaker: always. I always got something to say whether or not it's a relevant different story. Facts. Let's be honest, it's hard. Where's Jarvis? Why hasn't he come up here tonight? Usually he's like the new Tony D. If he sees a link, he's jumping in. Right? That's why it's funny.
Speaker: 30 minutes later, he's still into the punch line. All right. It's okay. I love that kid. He's a great kid, but man, he takes some beatings from everybody. And the reason why that's funny is hold on. Hold on. Let me tell you for five minutes, why this is really funny guys.
Speaker: I love Jarvis. I do love Jarvis. I'm not denying that. He's a great guy. We love you, Jarvis. If you're watching, we love you, buddy.
Speaker: Uh but no, we are going to think that we are going to take a real quick break out but like I told you guys, I got brand new music from Blacktop Mojo. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I love Blacktop moto. That's my favorite. Oh, you're pretty.
Speaker: Brand new Blacktop Mojo song. It's called Red Enough. And this is a brand new official video for the song. So I'm hearing it first with you guys as well. So let's check it out. Watch this one be an absolute shit pile of shit. I have to come back and go. Wow. You really got the ball on that one, didn't you guys? Damn.
Speaker: I mean, they all can't be bangers. These guys suck.
Speaker: But let's check it out. Like I said, it's called Red Enough. It's Blacktop Mojo. You can find them on all social media and wherever you stream music at Blacktop Mojo. Go show the guys some loves. Whether or not this song sucks or not, we don't know yet, but they do have plenty of other songs that are fucking badass. Yes. Yes. And here we go.
Speaker: Don't get me, I can't drive I played in the grass by road street time
Speaker: I won't know You're gone And I can still taste You on my tongue To live and leave my blood And I'll know I'm alone now
Speaker: He said from the sideways that I didn't like. I've longed a mouthful and he reached for his ghost. I felt the double much your way, but he had
Speaker: But now I'm thinking If I could break this down You'd already know I won't know you're gone And I can still taste you on my toe You're gonna leave my blood And I know I'm Alone now Let's not break this down
Speaker: I won't know you're gone And I can feel the taste you wipe my tongue Then the liquor leaves my blood And I know I'm
Speaker: Welcome back to jukebox jury gentlemen. What do you guys think? Is that a was that or was it not? I mean it wasn't bad. I mean I liked it. It was short though. Yeah, I mean it's a four -minute song Make sure he's doing okay
Speaker: I posted in chat also Chris if you want to look for new artists and stuff too as well Brian Andrews, he's big on like tick -tock. He's on Spotify and Apple and all that shit He's kind of a independent singer. He actually has some badass songs not gonna lie Look and see if I can find it. Ah, welcome back to the answers everybody
Speaker: And it was a new song by Blacktop Mojo. I liked it. Kind of a cool video. I will say this, I had to come back and actually say what I was joking about saying. It'll grow on me, but I still liked it. I liked the song.
Speaker: Yeah. Somebody shook on that. Every artist has a heartbreak. I mean, that was theirs. Well, no, no, no. Because the the one where what's the where where they're out by the campfire. Oh, sure. Chainsmoking whiskey. Chainsmoking whiskey. That's kind of a heartbreak song, too. So I'm just saying. Well, he's got he's got chainsmoking whiskey. That's his solo stuff. He's got the other ones.
Speaker: run away, wait it out, which are also kind of and way too strong. That's our all off. It's all about Matt. Just or give Matt a hug. Matt, are you good, bro? Everything? All right. Well, I'll get back to here in a second. No. Welcome back to the show, everybody.
Speaker: Uh, we got Jeff here. Conish here. Kay mags hanging out with us on a Saturday night. If you guys know me, um, click. You guys aren't already. Go ahead and check out the social medias, Facebook, Instagram, X, and tick tock. We also do the show live Mondays, Wednesdays, and Saturdays round seven, seven 30 ish.
Speaker: I'd like to get you guys in the chatters box and hanging out and shooting shit with us and all that fun stuff. And Saturdays, much like tonight we do to the open door challenge where we drop the link in the chat, Jeff, or if you'd be so kind. And you can come up and hang out with us live on the show. Everybody's welcome. We do enjoy that interaction as well.
Speaker: And you can listen to us anytime, any place, wherever you listen to podcasts, all at nonsensical nonsense podcast, or you can jump over to the bio .link slash nonsensical nonsense right there. And that's going to have all those links for you, including links for our sponsors as well. You guys can check them out. Make sure you use promo code words are hard. Uh, so last night,
Speaker: Friday's I do I do clicks house of music and Last night we did a tribute for for Toby key which I Played a lot of fucking great music played some songs over again. Got a lot of trouble on YouTube and And I read solo cuz I've done lost mine, but I have a whole bag of them And
Speaker: doing six hours of that. So, that'll just be throw it up as like a just a podcast episode and not really on a mixed cloud because Brian wound up coming in and uh now he's just a good show but during that show uh we had a long lost uh a friend who was kind of AWOL MIA pop up in the chat. Oh, really?
Speaker: Yeah. Benji was like, I tried to come up the other night, but I couldn't get the link to work or something. I was like, well, shit, man, all you gotta do is say something. We can get you the one one where he's got your number. Like, I was like, I was getting kind of worried about you, bro, because you didn't respond to any of my messages. I didn't know something happened. You were pissed off at me. He's like, I'm always here watching those.
Speaker: we were fucking honestly concerned about you bro you should know I mean you would have known that if you know if you were watching like where the hell is Benji at this guy this guy this motherfucker yeah he says he's not on discord anymore so so I was like well okay good to know you're alive and kicking yeah um when I told him I said you know
Speaker: If you're not doing it, you got your ears on there, good buddy. That's all I have for tonight. I'm good. You guys talk amongst yourselves. I'm going to watch TV. Sounds about right. I'm done.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: You know as our friends talk about buttered sausage talk about buttered sausage where it comes from what it does Why is it doing what it's doing get it out of my face? What about hurts buttered sausage? That's not your jam. It's not your thing. You don't like it. It's not my jam I don't buy jam by honey and I kiss it on the lips So such an unsettling video
Speaker: It would what would make it better? I had a bit of a Biden moment there. I did find out something interesting. And, you know, as I was telling Chris, really not all that interesting. Well, actually, no, this is right up all of our alley. The Deadpool teaser.
Speaker: Is going to be, uh, shown during the super bowl. Ooh, Deadpool three Taylor teaser will be played during the Superbowl. So, uh, that's why I'm watching the Superbowl tomorrow. I'm just saying, I don't care about the game itself. Except for the queeps, whoever wins. That's neither. I honestly don't care. I just want to see Taylor Swift.
Speaker: We know, Jeff, we know. I just want to see Taylor Swift, too. Actually, honestly, I don't care. I the only game I watch every I try to watch is the Super Bowl. You know, and once again, I don't care. But it's like I know on
Speaker: Wednesday or Monday or whatever, it's going to be brought up on the show. So instead of sitting here glass eyed and bored out of my mind for that hour, I might as well have something to contribute. For once. How do you want to contribute to the show? What, 400 and some odd episodes? I think you said now you want to start contributing. Now you want to contribute.
Speaker: Baby steps, baby steps.
Speaker: Just like, I see this article about a TV. It was 109 inches and this guy bought it and it couldn't get it out of the truck. Well, how the fuck did they get it in the truck in the first place? Actually, it was 136. Wait a minute. It's 165. I mean, it's 156. I mean, it's 198 inches. I mean, it's in a library. Actually, it's in a museum. Actually, it's at some guy's house in his backyard. Actually, I have no idea what the fuck I'm talking about.
Speaker: I know you don't. That's the part we're going to clip right there. Hardest to get a job on on American media because they just post it out of their ass and make stuff up too. Yeah, there you go. Thanks.
Speaker: I don't know what the hell I'm talking about. I don't even know what the hell I'm doing. I don't even know where I am anymore. I'm going to assume you're somewhere in an apartment. But other than that, I couldn't tell you. Yeah, I don't even know what's going on anymore. I was actually getting ready to, oh, yeah, that's what I was going to look up. He was going to look up Taylor Swift. You brought it up, so. Yeah. Got hit up the old T -Swizzle train. Actually, I actually saw a report that
Speaker: they're they're people are tracking her flight to make sure she can make the Super Bowl on time because it's like some some kid is already tracking her flight period or or tracking her plane period because of her uh she's polluting the air and her whatever you I saw a picture on Instagram it was it was like Taylor Swift's house but there's like 14 planes on the track
Speaker: Yeah. I was like, nice. So they actually have. Speaking of the Super Bowl, Taylor Swift Super Bowl prop bet list. Oh yeah, we did. We did this last year, didn't we? Prop bets. I don't know, but there's there's 16 of them. This is Taylor all Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift will be shown on camera during the game at least six times. Yes or no.
Speaker: Oh, 100%. Uh, Taylor Swift will make it to the Superbowl on time for kickoff after her Tokyo concert. Great. Like if she came out, like she shows up at halftime and the chiefs are up like 35 to nothing and she comes at halftime and then they lose 42 to 35. And it's like, good job. All of the red nation hates Taylor Swift from that moment on. Great.
Speaker: Um, they have, uh, Will Swift be wearing a Kelsey Jersey? Yeah. But spoiler alert, it'll be Jason Kelsey and not Travis Kelsey. I did see, uh, where was it? I saw a couple of different prop bets. Like who's going to win the coin toss and you know what, you know, whatever. Oh yeah. I mean, they've got the normal ones. How long is the national anthem?
Speaker: in seconds and it's over 90 .5 seconds or under. Uh, what will the, what will the result of the coin flip be? These are your normal ones. Uh, will the opening kickoff result in a touchback? That's a safe bet. Yes. Oh, that's all they do anymore. What will be the result of the opening drive touchdown field goal punt or other, um,
Speaker: What will be the first turnover of the game? Fumble interception, turnover, run downs, whatever. Right. Et cetera, et cetera. Who will win the Super Bowl MVP Brock Purdy, Patrick Mahomes, or other. Well, actually Patrick Mahomes is favored. Will Travis Kelsey propose to Taylor Swift? Actually, you know, I think, I don't, does anybody really give a shit? Not really.
Speaker: Like, once again, is it really going to affect your life if Taylor Swift gets proposed? Is this kid's name Lenny P? She usually tracks all the flights. That that that disgusting old hag that wants to argue with everybody on other platforms. Oh, yeah. Always up in everybody's business.
Speaker: Alright, gentlemen, I do have to head off. You guys have a great night. Always fun. It's fun as always. Oh my god. Well, maybe fun for you. Well, I mean, looking at you kind of brings it down a little bit but. Looking at my smexy face. Well, smexy maybe but face definitely not.
Speaker: What is your what is your prediction for the over -under gone let's be honest he's kind of a douche isn't he? What is your what is your over -under for the game? What's my over -under on what on the game? What do you mean?
Speaker: So the combined score at the end of the game for me over, no, over under is when you combine the scores, is it going to be higher or lower than X number? The number right now is 47 .5 is what the O is it going to be higher or lower? I think with those, I think with those two teams, especially the San Francisco 49ers who are fucking loaded all over the field on offense, it's going to be over over.
Speaker: Yeah. Plus, Casey likes to put up a lot of points, too. Right. Well, they're going to have a hard time against San Francisco's defense, but San Francisco is known for just putting up a ton of points. Jeff's currently placing bets right now. Just so you know. I'm actually looking at different prop bets. This is the party prop bets for game day. Lakeland National Anthem is on their coin toss results game winner.
Speaker: Game total over under first offensive play of the game runner pass Will it will there be a score in the first eight six minutes? 59 seconds random number Team to score the first Jersey number score that to get the first touchdown first acceptable accepted penalty will be against which team and then this
Speaker: a score in the final two minutes of the first half. Yeah. So Thursday night, I popped in for the guys talking shit for the anniversary show. They had Bryce was in there. Bryce something or other. But he's an aspiring comedian, state of comedian. Right.
Speaker: He's not pretty good for himself. He's got quite the following and whatnot on social media and everything. But I guess during the Super Bowl, he's going to live stream the entire Super Bowl. I think he said every time they show Taylor Swift or mention Taylor Swift, he's taking a shot.
Speaker: Oh, he's going to be hammering. It was nice meeting you. And it was nice knowing you for a couple hours. You know, here's the thing. It would not surprise me one bit. If they had like a picture in picture of the entire game of just one camera on Taylor, that's always at the bottom of the screen. You know what I mean? It would not shock me at this point. They'd get a couple more views too.
Speaker: Well, and I think that's the that's the idea. That's the concept of doing that, because you know that there's. The Swifties out there, the only reason they're watching the game is can't catch a glimpse of Taylor. Exactly. And like. After that first glimpse, they're like, OK, I'm done. Well, they're dying for Casey fans. That's why they're watching the game. Sure they are. Then Casey fans since August.
Speaker: 20, 20, 30, whatever the hell those two started dating. It blows my mind like and even way back with like the Beatles and stuff like that. Like an artist can have such a massive
Speaker: the the
Speaker: Primarily and I'm not trying to call y 'all out, but I think it's primarily a woman thing just because of the like the love for drama If there's if there's drama we have to be a part of it That's why they have the the Cosmo magazines or whatever That makes so much fucking money is because it's all it's the drama Yeah
Speaker: I'm sorry. I'm going to do a shots fighter on Taylor. She's written 475 songs about breakups yet. She's already single. They're saying that she's got zero songs about blow jobs. I'm just saying common denominator there. You know,
Speaker: I'm gonna let you two go ahead and grab the reins on your woman hatin Uh, say no one point did I say that I hate women Primarily speaking most women love drama and pee it's a it's just it's just a truthful statement has nothing to do with hate And and I i'm not saying I wouldn't go to Yeah, I was gonna say
Speaker: Where did the Beatles have drama? I guess they did. Well, yeah, they had all kinds of drama. They were considered considered what was like corrupting minds and stuff. Yoko killed the Beatles. Fucking bitch. Yeah, she did. But please continue hating on women. But no, it's not even I don't like I said, it's not even about women in general.
Speaker: people like people that follow celebrities like that watch every single episode of the Kardashians and **** you like the **** life. You know what I mean? It's the same thing as well as as the Kardashians. Well, that's all about drama. Let's be honest. Exactly. Well, that's that's what that's what I'm saying. Damn, you're a **** soap opera drama. I mean, I mean, people are you got they got famous because their sister
Speaker: looks like she was terrible in bed and gave a horrible blowjob and their mom recorded it. That's the reason I got her. Her mom literally, her mom was basically holding the goddamn camera and then it got accidentally released. It was a nobody having sex with another woman. Accidentally, as in her mom hit send. Only to the world. You know.
Speaker: No, Kim Kardashian is having sex with Brandi's brother. What's his name? We have no idea. I've never seen it. Have you seen the video? Because I haven't. Yeah. And I'm the guy that, you know, I'm going wrong. I love porn, but I have no desire to see it either. You know, and I'll say this back then, Kim K.
Speaker: Before all the plastic surgery and everything like that, I thought she was gorgeous. And now she's done all the weird plastic surgery and everything. Well, yeah, yeah. Well, actually referring to the beehive in the 50s being like a cult. Right. Well, and then you got the other people that follow fucking Justin Bieber. Very heavily.
Speaker: Actually mostly, yeah. All those people are men. How many women can say you can have that level of a follower? I was referring specifically where I was praying to take the conversation because of the like Swifties and the Beehive or whatever, Beyonce's fan base. I didn't know who the Beehive was. Specifically where I was trying to go with it was, you know, it's crazy.
Speaker: What's the word for it? Adoration. I get that. Like, hey, good on them. They fucking broke glass ceiling or whatever. But to follow and blindly accept whatever they say, that's a pop out. And it's like, yeah, they can sing. Good for them. So wait a minute. I said, just be better. No.
Speaker: No, like I was where I was going with that before you guys went on the we hate women rampage. I mean, I never said I hate women in the human woman hater club over here without Bundy. So like like Travis Kelsey had the number 10 ranked selling jersey last year. This year, I think it's like number one and just destroying everybody like Chiefs TV ratings.
Speaker: Skyrock, I don't know the exact numbers, but, you know, they went way high once it came out that Kelsey and Taylor were dating. I don't like I don't like Taylor's music or anything like that. But I got a couple of good songs to give her a lot of credit. For the most part, she seems like a very good role model for girls. So I got to give her a lot of credit on that aspect. Beyonce, I think her and JC are fucking morons, but.
Speaker: Um, but the fan base, the, the Swifties and the beehive and, and, and, and, and, or any, you know, like Elvis back in the day or the Beatles back in the day, their fans are almost like a goddamn cult. The only difference was, you know, he didn't hear all the crazy that came from the fan base. Like you do now. Well, I think it's mainly because the internet, I mean, Swifties are out there literally.
Speaker: You know, if I were to come out here and go, you know, I wasn't a really big fan of Taylor shorts out with my, yeah, we get it. She's had bad relationships. We don't care. I'm done. I'm over it. And I'm happy that Miley won the every fucking, you know, that Miley won the Grammy or her, over Taylor. Um, Yeah. All of a sudden they're sending me fucking death threats and wanting to do, it's like, y 'all really need to like calm down. Yeah. Let's be honest. If, if.
Speaker: if Taylor doesn't put it on an album tomorrow, is it really going to affect you? No. You know, if Taylor never puts on another album, well, yes, they're fanatical. The word comes from fan comes from Fanatic. Thank you. Thank you, Captain. Obvious answer over here. Somebody got their smart pants on today. Yeah. Like, you know, as much as I like
Speaker: as much as I love like my sports teams or uh you know whatever I'm just gonna if somebody's like fucking brows will blow I'll be like yeah they do suck a lot you know I'm not gonna go fight somebody because they
Speaker: Well, I think that's the problem. That's the problem. Like, how bad is it? How bad is your life that your greatest ambition is a death threat? Somebody because they shit on Taylor Swift's. Yeah, I'm not going to talk somebody and call their call their employer and be like, this guy said that that that you should fire him. I bought my boss were like, well, they do. We are culture. You suck.
Speaker: stealers blow i don't even watch the nfl on another steelers blow it's it's it's weird how how you know some of these some of these people are it's it's i you know what here's the thing though and and i say this i say this earnestly
Speaker: I feel bad.
Speaker: Give it a rep. Philadelphia and Philadelphia sports fans are all cock smoochers. They think they have the greatest teams on the planet. And then they just disrespectful room. Your city's trash. Your teams are trash. And your people who live there are trash. Fuck you, Philadelphia. Really good thing that came out of Philadelphia was Rocky. Sorry, I hate Philadelphia. Now I'm on a tangent. What about the Eggles? Fuck the Eggles.
Speaker: I mean, fuck the Fort, or fuck the 76ers, bucks, fuck the goddamn Philly baseball team, whatever they're called, the Philadelphia Pedos or whatever, Philly. I didn't know they had a hockey team too. Fuck it all. All their sports teams in Philly. Fuck them all. You're Philly. You can suck my dick and eat my asshole. I mean, suck my banana and eat my chocolate donut. There you go.
Speaker: No, I mildly feel bad for Taylor. I'm sure the millions of dollars she makes every year makes up for it. But Tom Hanks and his film. Yeah, the only thing good that ever came out of that godforsaken city was Rocky Balboa and Apollo Creed and R .I .P. Carl Weathers.
Speaker: I blame you, Taylor Swift. No, but I only feel bad for her because I guarantee you she can't go outside without being mobbed. She can't even go to Starbucks and pick up coffee. I mean, she's got enough money. She can have a Starbucks in her house. Let's be honest. That's the unfortunate downside to fame at the end of the day. Yeah. What should become so fucking popular
Speaker: or whatever, you know, you can't, it's like, they're still normal people. Even the fuck alone. If you see them out on the, you know, if I'm sitting at a fucking restaurant, if I'm sitting at McDonald's and I look over and Taylor Swift to sit beside me and enjoy the Big Mac, I'd be like, Hey, how you doing? And then just go about my day. A normal person that's sitting beside me, if we were sitting there eating and I make eye contact, be like, Hey, how you doing?
Speaker: Yeah, I don't think I would freak out about a celebrity. I honestly don't. I mean, we've seen you freak out when you met Matt. I didn't freak out in any way, shape, or form. God, you almost blew in right here. I think I might ship my pants with Ben Shapiro, like, said hi to me. Yeah, but if Ben Shapiro walked in the room right now, I'd be like, hey, look at that. Ben Shapiro's in my house. That would be it.
Speaker: I would definitely want to have a conversation. Like why he's in my house. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Guys, look at this. Like I don't think I honestly don't think I would fan girl out about anybody. So it's like a spunky garage walked into your house. You'd fucking lose your shit. I'd ask them a shit ton of questions about cars. What is that gear shift? Fucking. Well, what does that show that you what is that television show you're always talking about here? Top gear.
Speaker: Yeah. Those guys, you'd lose your **** Yeah. Like **** Vin. I honestly don't. Oh my god. That's the biggest. That's the greatest car ever. Hey Vin, does the carpet match the drapes?
Speaker: Look, we could, we could, we could do, I can, I can actually, we can do an interview with Vin Diesel right now. I'll be Vin Diesel. Ask me whatever question you want to ask. Family. I don't have fan friends. I am Groot. I am Groot. Family. I live my life. Honestly, the only, the only thing that we're kind of freaking out about fighting a celebrity is if the celebrity was like,
Speaker: Mildly hitting on I'd be like holy shit Christine reaching just hit on me, but that's not gonna happen So I'm not worried internet stockers are a real thing lady said uh, but you know, that's the saddest thing obsession and stockers It affect anyone When I was on when she was on periscope, she had said she had several and she was nobody I'm in a couple that got a little weird when I was on periscope I know she's talking about yeah, it could happen to anybody at the end of the day um You know
Speaker: but I'm not sure. For me personally, I'm not, I'm not telling anybody else how to, how to live their life or how to deal with it. Me personally, you can stop me. You can be weird. You can be creepy all you want. I'm going to keep doing my thing because at the end of the day, if you ever show up at my house, you're going to hear a very distinct song. Yeah, it's, it's, it's my binder Vanna. It's called click, click, boom. It's song.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yeah, Jeff. Don't fucking say Tony D. He thinks he's a celebrity. I don't say Tony D. I would die if she put Tony D. I'd be like, oh my god. Like he's definitely hitting the sauce tonight. I just want to just have fun. I just want to do my show and have fun.
Speaker: I don't know. But on the other hand, wouldn't wouldn't it be weird to be as famous as those people? I would like to show if this show became the next Joe Rogan and we got Taylor Swift following that would kind of that'd be fucked up. I mean, another reason I don't want you first and foremost, you know, I don't want to call like a famous agree. No.
Speaker: Oh, I would be fun. Let me tell you on here. Hello. She'll be like George Michaels. You know the guy you you know, they've been the six pistols. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, not the lead singer, but he actually used to carry their equipment. Oh, he's an equipment manager. She said, she said not all capital letters, not. No, I did. I think it would be weird to date a celebrity at the end of the day.
Speaker: Well, like, okay, if you're dating somebody, and I'm just throwing out a name that's not super popular, if you're dating like Walter Goggins, I think you're going to be good. Yeah, but he's, but I mean, you're, if you're dating somebody like Taylor Swift, so you want to hang out in this room of your million dollar multi -million dollar mansion or that room? I mean, Justin Bieber or anything like that. I mean, you can't,
Speaker: I don't think I want to take somebody where we couldn't go out in public. I wouldn't, I genuinely don't think that I would really want to be famous. I mean, I prefer not to go out in public. Yeah, exactly. I mean, if this show was the next, uh, was the next joke and like sweet, but it would be really irritating to leave the house because I already don't like people. I fucking hate people.
Speaker: Well strangers make me so uneasy and then people coming up to you like Hey, hey like they fucking know you that would upset me. Yeah, I would be well celebrity If you get to be somebody as big as Taylor Swift You are you are literally so used to it that you literally start having to watch what you say So you don't offend your millions and millions of fans
Speaker: see in that case i don't want that i don't want that i would do it on purpose oh yeah 100 i want to get rid of at least half of you i heard you i heard that he's a
Speaker: I didn't say anything inappropriate.
Speaker: Hey, you know what? You don't tell me how to run my show. How's that sound? Oh, it's up all night. Hey, like them apples. Yeah. That one up all night. Yeah. Put that one up. I don't care how many people new comment on this. We could have 20 new people on the show. That's staying up all night. Did you and Matlock solve crimes together? Is that what you did?
Speaker: Well, Matlock was a lawyer, let's be honest. You know what? Now on New Rule. We don't put Legge's comments on the screen anymore. There you go. Apparently we offend her. Does that offend you, Legge? Does that offend you? She said, that's fine by me. I'm just kidding.
Speaker: keep it up. We'll actually stop acknowledging you. I'm just speaking. Like he thinks Americans are thin skinned. He said we're snowflakes. Do you think? Well, like you'll back me up. Most people outside the US look at the US the way US looks at Florida. Well,
Speaker: also at the same point, I was trying to debate that and tell her that I didn't think that that's an accurate thing to make and then Tony came up live with her and completely validated everything she said and I was like, well, fine. I can't really argue that now. You never believe what they did in America today. They elected a 95 year old Sino man.
Speaker: And half the country thinks he's a good president. It's, it's, it is weird. I get that. I get that. Like it is weird when people like name drop because I told you your kids worked in bed. Um, yeah, I don't, I don't think, I don't know. It's weird for me, you know, cause I've known some, uh, musicians and comedians and athletes and stuff like that throughout the years.
Speaker: I just don't want to be that douchebag who's like, well, I mean, I hung out with so -and -so last, you know, last night. Yeah. Yeah. I was hanging out with, uh, you know, Tom Cruise the other day and he told me a funny story. Who cares? I don't care. Yeah, I don't even know. Maybe I was just a completely random band that I picked out of my, my head that I knew was. And like you was like, Oh yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, I know him. Well, actually, I know those guys. Well, actually, actually, we'll sit here, all you little peasants. Actually, we had an affair. Hmm. I don't know. I know. I know. I couldn't tell you one sex pistol. So I don't think I don't think you're good either.
Speaker: That's how I am. You know, it's like people I just know, especially, especially when you like work security at concert, you know, or like venues and shit like that. Well, yeah, you met those Instagram people and you were like, who? Yeah. So in some in some people. She said he's like sold her man, huh? He's a painter. And he's like older than Jesus. Yeah, I was going to say.
Speaker: It was the big bang loud. That was, that was a good one. I'll never forget that. I'm using that on my dad the next time I see him. But yeah, some of the, some of the, some of the, uh, I guess you could say celebrities that would come through like venues and stuff that I worked at. Some of them were, most of them were super cool, but you'd have the occasional asshole. And it was like, why are you a cock?
Speaker: you know, like, you do know it's my job to protect you if somebody rushes the stage. Keep being a dick. I'm going to be one. That guy was a dick. He's going to die first and see, hey, you see the guy in the blue shorts? That's semi automatic, right? Yeah. The guy in the blue shorts. Go for him first. God damn. Like, you're old as hell too.
Speaker: You just missed walking around with Jesus if Tony's only nine years older than you. Tony is BC and you're AB. She was in class with Jesus while Tony was there before Jesus was born. Facts on facts. Leggy was desk buddies with him.
Speaker: I'm the same age as you. You. I'm the same age as you. You got a point there. So, maybe not make fun of like you for being old.
Speaker: Chokes on you, I'm only 22. Yeah. Centuries. Calm down there, Benjamin Button. Shut the fuck up over there, William Wallace. Don't think I didn't see that picket banner that you put in there.
Speaker: We put it on a stake and just playing it right in front of the camera. What? You just proved our point. What happened? Will arm. Will arm. He could be Connor on a stick. Will you arm?
Speaker: Yeah, go ahead. I don't feel like that. We have the spelling of Jeff. Now that's an insult. Nobody on this panel. My wheelie arm is just big.
Speaker: As we discovered a couple of shows back, my willy arm is 475 centimeters. I haven't committed to memory. What did you say? 475. Honor. What?
Speaker: Because the lights are on, but nobody's home. What? Biden? Are you with us, buddy? Yes, what? Okay, so you are 50 ,800 micrometers. Macros? Micro. Macros? Macro weed?
Speaker: You don't have a macro wean, you have a micro wean. I am micro meter. Micro, my not grow. And micro, you're not sure. But what it does is going to be huge. Once we're finished, it's just going to be wonderful. Great. Everyone agrees. It's amazing.
Speaker: Chris, you know how you talked about that presidential, where they play games?
Speaker: Will it be huge? Will it be huge? The three presidents played call of duty. Oh, yeah, the president. Yes, it's hilarious. Well, I actually saw a guy, he does an imitation of Barack Obama and he also does an imitation of Donald Trump. And he's like, if Donald Trump and Barack Obama played hide and seek, he's like, Donald, I can see you. And he's like, no, you can't. This is the greatest thing behind the curtain.
Speaker: No, I'm not. Maybe I am. I don't know. Why are you speaking? Shane, Shane Gillis or whatever the fuck. Yeah, Shane Gillis. His fucking Trump impression is spot on. Oh, yeah. Have you seen his his his bit where he's fucking talking about they should have
Speaker: They should have the election so that Trump isn't in it until the very end. And he's like the wild card and they have a final debate. And it's just the, the stone cold music starts playing as he walks out onto the debate stage, walks up to the mic. They're both gay. I'm the greatest. Yeah. Cartman.
Speaker: Oh, I told the guy, I told the guy speaking to your impersonations, Jeff. I told the guys, I told Mark and Brian, I said, you guys got it. Next time you're on the show, you got to ask Jeff to do his Christopher Walken. It's terrible. It's awesome. I told him, I said, it's fucking spot on. If you close your eyes, you'll think you're listening. You're talking to Christopher Walken.
Speaker: I cannot do. He has got he's got he's I have a terrible Christopher Walken. Do it. Christopher Walken. Christopher Walken sounds like this. Look here and see. What are you going to do now? Hey, you're talking to my guy. I'm seeing you talking to my guy. I'm wrong.
Speaker: You know, you're talking to my guy overall There's a commercial I think it's a BMW commercial that Chris were walking
Speaker: Is it all this again? Chris, we're walking for a commercial. We're walking is kind of making us around town. It's a BMW commercial and everybody's talked to him doing their Chris for walking impression. And he's just nodding off and thinking at all. I lost it. He's like at the coffee shop and the guy's like, yeah, imagine though, it go back to that conversation about being celebrity.
Speaker: be a famous if you're one of those guys like tenier or trump or madden or or you it's like hey it's the champ and you're like yeah i'm not really is there a way for me to delete comments stop it is walking walking around
Speaker: Yeah. Welcome to the world of Adminship. I think that I have a paracord around here somewhere. I can end it. You were one of those guys who everybody impersonates, and you meet somebody, you're like out to dinner or some jerk -off, like Jeff walks up to you and Jeff walks up and he's like,
Speaker: Hey, how are you doing? I'm doing good. You're like, I'm just like, that's my walk in. How was it? Don't you shit. No, but like, remember, remember when when Ace Ventura came out and everybody was doing Jim Carrey. Oh, right. He then that shit. I bet you every day, Connor, like, oh, my God. I'm doing what I fucking want, Leggy.
Speaker: Deborah don't pretend Like you like you don't number sign don't don't number sign Who's back Boys are back in town
Speaker: Is it weird that I have a boner right now? Does anybody else have a hard honor if that's just me? It's totally hard right now. It's super huge, eh?
Speaker: That's my Chris, we're walking to a Donald Trump, you know? Peter, you know I can't feel my cock. I can love family. That shit is so funny.
Speaker: Why would you put the cookies on the top shelf? I love that guy and I love him. He's so funny. Oh, his name's Joe. Yeah, Joe is. No, Patrick Warburton, who does the voice is fun. Right. Yeah. Well, he was great in the new tick series that was on Amazon for like the original. He did the original tick series. Well, he was he was the voice. Yeah. Well, they did a live action one where he played tick and it was fucking hilarious.
Speaker: I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't
Speaker: Lee singer Finn Lizzie who sang the boys back in town just automatically assumed. Oh, he's an Irish musician, songwriter and poet. He's Irish vocals, basic basis for primary songwriter for the hard rock band. Actually, he was not Scottish. I feel like I need to get an Ireland flag now for the American flag. Finn Lizzie, yes.
Speaker: I didn't listen to anything else other than boys are back in town. I've heard of them, but I don't know that I was a huge fan of them. I didn't know they sang that song actually. I didn't either. Well, uh. Oh, he actually wrote whiskey in the jar too. Yeah. Whiskey in the jar. Cowboy songs. Whiskey in the jar. Oh, my Metallica. Yeah.
Speaker: God, I hate Metallica. Fucking sellouts. Oh, he actually he became an influence by he was influenced by Motown and the Mamas and Papas. He was in the Black Eagles in sixty five. Eighty six. Oh, apparently somebody sang like him. So don't sing like that ever again. Oh, OK. Fuck you, lady. Yeah. Fuck you.
Speaker: god that was just like matter of fact fuck you leggy
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: I sit back and watch now. Oh, yeah, I fucked up. Actually, like I'm really trying to think of you want to be real about it. Like politics is kind of like it's a drama. It's a soap opera. Yeah, it's exactly what I was thinking. I think there's no leak to what's coming. Right. Well, that is a lot of hair between those three sons of bitches. Yes. Oh, what are you looking at, Chris?
Speaker: Is that a lady? Dude looks like a lady. I wanted to look up Finn Lizzie songs because in the first picture is like there's three guys and then homeboy's got a big old fro and then other homeboys got like a weird jerry curl and a full -blown beard and the other guy has lady hair and formed in Dublin in 69. Yeah, it was. He's a guitarist.
Speaker: Basic guitar, lead vocalist, and principal songwriter, Phil McCracken, drummer Brian Downey Jr. Guitarist, that's Robert's other brother, Brian Downey. Guitarist, Eric Bell, and organist, Eric Rexen. Although Rexen left. I'm trying to see like,
Speaker: I don't know. Boys are back in town. I know whiskey in the jar but I actually knew that because of stupid Metallica. Well, actually, the originals would. Well, yeah, that's what I said. I I only knew that song because of stupid Metallica. Right. I don't think I do any of their other songs. I I don't. I wasn't. I mean, I'll be honest. I wasn't a huge fan. I mean, I've never heard of the songs though. Holy ****
Speaker: They come. Look at the man. Jesus. They were some **** work horses, man. Yeah. From 71 to 80. 83. They put out like twelve albums. Sorry. Just joking. Just joking. Just joking. Well, they sure as hell weren't putting out albums in the 90s or the 2000s considering the lead singer died.
Speaker: I don't fucking know. Holy shit. Remix. The sort of God, if you go on break when I come back, I'm. All right, let's wait till he goes back to break. Yeah, we'll go break when he goes. If you want to hear a bunch of talks. Hold it like a man worried about a ghost.
Speaker: Midge you read the guy whose birthday I went to was oh wow nice Journey and they wrote stuff later had a huge hit with yellow girl I Just don't think I was a big fan and nothing against them obviously the was a huge song that songs on every like movie I
Speaker: I didn't know that they were. I mean, actually, in all honesty, I knew it didn't lose you, but I didn't know they were Scottish men. I just thought they were in that weird, like, conglomerate of, like, 38 Special and... I thought it was 38 Special that sung that. I thought it was Chicago. No, I honestly did.
Speaker: Irish with a couple scoots in it. Had to go over to Scotland, you know, and grab people off the island. I will never let that shit die. I'm sorry, it's still funny.
Speaker: Oh my god. I need to beat some balls. Bobbles. Yeah, Connor will be back soon. You can. Yeah, you can boot all you want. Boot away. But be warned. You didn't hear that from me. I'm not saying. I don't even know what the hell we were talking about.
Speaker: I don't either because I had something that I wanted to say and I forgot what it was. Yeah, he does. Trust me. If he didn't like it, you know. Trust me. Yeah. I am. I actually think it's going to be what what. So there has been a couple of leaks for Super Bowl commercials.
Speaker: What what's really not really the least when the companies are dropping them? Well, that's that's the thing back in the day a Super Bowl commercial wouldn't show up until the Super Bowl now you're getting them super early Conner's this true What no why why would you think I don't like leggy like he's a nice lady Deborah you just get on my nerves. I
Speaker: I hate women. Love nipples though. Hate women. It's a give and take. Nipples in general. It's not even women's nipples. Women's nipples, men's nipples, animals nipples. It don't matter. He always wants to see if he can milk them. Men can milk too. Makes great for shea butter. Yeah.
Speaker: It's not you like he hates all women.
Speaker: Yes. Any old nipple, but you can't you can't say although our commercial Jeff wants to talk so bad about the Super Bowl because he's watching. Any old nipple will do. Always. Has to be has to be clean though.
Speaker: Oh, you did over there, buddy. I get excited. I'm sorry. No, a lot of a lot of the a lot of the big a lot of the big companies. Jesus. Do you smell toast? Yeah, something.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: We were one call away and one man stepped up for the job and it was like, stay for shorts and anger. And then it starts to pan up and it shows like the khaki, the khakis, and then the red shirt. And then it just stops. Yeah. It kind of goes, it kind of goes, you know, and then like door dash is doing when everything we dash. So they're like giving away, I guess they're giving away like three cars.
Speaker: Literally everything you can dash, they're doing something with that, you know, they're giving away. Well, they're, they're, they're doing a, they did a thing with Jennifer Anderson and David Schwimmer. Like Jennifer Anderson says like, if you can literally order anything on door dash, but to remember that you have to forget, you have to forget something. So it's like people are forgetting like their pin code or their,
Speaker: I'm forgetting math and Jennifer Anderson forgets who David Schwimmer is. She's like, who are you? And he's like, we worked together for 10 years. She's like, really? Yes, it's. And that's the best part of this week. Super cool. Let's be honest. Nobody cares about the game. I want to see the commercials. Yeah, the commercials are great. The halftime show is going to be
Speaker: the whole
Speaker: Yeah, like the last. Milly's, Milly's making a comeback. Let's have a leftover Alfredo sauce. Yeah. Like a week or so ago, I put them in the lid often. It was not white. Uh, yeah. Oh, I forgot that was in there. I was actually going to eat. There wasn't much of that left though, was there? Yeah. I was actually going to eat that. I forgot all about it. What a waste.
Speaker: Who cares about the starving kids in Africa? There's a starving Chris right there. I was going to say there's apparently there's enough food and Chris is free to be left over that week. The only thing I've eaten for like the last two weeks have been frozen burritos and produce.
Speaker: Hey, I've been there with eating the like you you get on a kick are like delicacies from the gods
Speaker: they're just a **** tortilla shell wrapped in bean and cheese much but it's so **** delicious. As long as you don't as long as you don't look at it while you're eating it, you're gold in a way. Oh no, I open it up. I dip my chips in it. I put chips inside of it. I'm like, yeah, man. I bet you like it.
Speaker: all the chips. He's bougie with it. Inside that warm mushy burrito. Let's put the chip right in there. Warm mushy. Totally. Makes me spit it out first. That's not the only thing he's putting in his burrito. Chip, give a good sensual lick and then put it in and then take it out. Put it in and then take it out.
Speaker: the the the the
Speaker: One of the Costco mini tacos covering his little pecker Dorito, it's just a Dorito Dorito, it's a nacho cheese Dorito gentlemen our new sponsor Did want to tell you guys I didn't want to wait until later New York City
Speaker: a couple of new sponsors. Doritos, one of them and El Paso Salsa. There's a speaking of frozen food. There's a I can't remember the brand but they make a frozen lasagna. Oh my god. I don't know but it's probably stuff. It's makes the best lasagna. Oh, it's **** amazing. It's like a minute in the
Speaker: Oh, I always do the oven. We get the big. No, no, no. It's like, it's their, their individual. Obviously. Speaking of eating frozen delicacies. So this afternoon I was cleaning the house and stuff like that. And I got a little bit hungry, whatever. So I grabbed a,
Speaker: the frozen sausage egg and cheese croissants microwave let them set everything so they cool down so I thought first bite I take I bite into it there's like a pocket where there's fucking lava setting it's it's like liquefied cheese in it fucking right on my lip and then it got stuck there it's dude it was like felt like hours of
Speaker: like you know that when you look in the mirror, your lip is gone and you look like the guy that Hannibal Lecter ate his face.
Speaker: Yeah. Right. And it burnt the fuck out of my lip. And I'm like taking an ice cube out of my cup and putting it on my poor little lip. And I'm like, oh, but you're upset. You're upset that you can't keep eating. I was mad. I was mad at the food. I was like, stupid fucking dumb French people and your stupid fucking. And nobody fucking likes you. Go to hell.
Speaker: I was mad at France but apparently it's their fault. Dude, I bit a chunk out of my **** tongue and it hurt like hell to eat for like two weeks straight. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. He's on my mouth. So, they're like, really? Wait, what? Hold up. I said,
Speaker: eat. Have you ever get a cold store? Like you just talk about. Yeah. And eat when you take a chunk out of your, when you bite a chunk out of your tongue. But you know how you like get a cold store like right on the inside of your lips or everything you eat or drink or even like when you're talking. Yeah. That fucking thing is just like. And it's just like, it's just swollen enough so that when you eat, it's right in that spot where you bite it every fucking time. Yeah.
Speaker: Dude, the way I bit a chunk out of my tongue, those fucking I threw up in my jaw lock and my jaw lock like that and fucking bit a huge fucking chunk out of my fucking tongue. I yesterday. How gross was that to throw up in your jaw lock and not be able to get it out of your mouth? So it went around the little holes right there in the back of your jaw. It literally went around.
Speaker: Oh, God. That's fucking. And then when I was in my mouth again, I could feel the. There was there was blood fucking all over the goddamn toilet. It was fucking everywhere. And literally two, two and a half weeks, it hurt like hell to eat, talk, drink. Water didn't help. Nothing.
Speaker: I hate like cuts and shit on the inside of my mouth. Oh, yeah. The worst one I had this past week is is I built a handle. I wouldn't handle for the little door for where I keep my tools. You know, Michelle broke it. And the screws were still there because she unscrewed the rest and she didn't take the screws out. And I went to grab it and I cut my finger on the screw.
Speaker: You know, I really thought this was somewhere else since we were talking about injuries. Yeah, I thought I got a splinter in his mouth or something because he was like mobbed on the knob. We're in here. Had to get a tetanus shot in my mouth. We're in the kitchen cooking and Tanya says, she's squeeze a little lime on that. I'm like, all right. And I didn't think about it. Oh,
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: We went to get the tire changed on the uh on the equinox I was pumping I was pumping up the donut but I had to use a bike pump and it had one of the needles stuck in it And so i'm sitting there with my knife doing this trying to get it out my knife slipped off and it went into my finger But it hit like right on the the shallow part of your skin where the knuckle is But it went down to the bone and my shit was bruised for like a week So I was just fucking lucky at the placement
Speaker: scar on my hand when I worked at Orkin. So when you work in pest control and you empty a container, you have to triple rinse it and everything like that. Then you have to stab holes in it. Well, we were standing in the supply cage area. So they used to have it set up to when if I needed a new bottle of something, you had to bring the empty back in and
Speaker: you know, show your boss that it was empty or sharp. It was stupid at the time. I'm glad they did away with it. But uh so you know, I was rinsing it out and he's like, oh **** my knife in my truck. My **** boss is like, don't worry about it here. Just use mine. I was like, cool. So, you have to punch a few holes in it and as I go to you have the first hole into it, the boss, my boss is like, oh, be careful with **** and it
Speaker: it's like straight through the sides of this plastic bottle and right into my **** hand and it's like quarter inch into my **** hand. I was like, yeah, it's sharp alright and I lift it up. It's the funny thing. The funny thing, we're we're a three grown **** man that know how to use a knife.
Speaker: Yeah, but how many times have you cut yourself while doing something you're not supposed to do with a knife like cutting cutting towards yourself? Yeah My wife sitting there aren't you not supposed to cut towards yourself I've done this Oh
Speaker: Like, do we need to go get stitches? Nah, I got super glue. That last comment, thankfully she worded it the way she did.
Speaker: Really? Oh, gorgeous. So my buddy Doc was over at my house back room in El Paso and we were chopping up fucking we're chopping up a fire. What? You said a bloody car. No, I said my bloody doc. Oh, I thought you said bloody cock. I'm like real name is real name is Chase, but he's docked to me because he was my medic for three years. Right. Anyway.
Speaker: Yeah, he was. He was a **** idiot when he got backstage size. We're out there chopping wood and he he like skimmed off the piece of wood and he was wearing crocs and it went straight or no, it was hey dudes and it went straight through his hey dudes and like a sliver of his his pinky toe that big **** just gone. Damn that you you know what those foot injuries suck because a few weeks back after we got done on the show,
Speaker: She's got like her spot at the end of the bed with the blanket and pillow and stuff. She likes to fucking bury him. Right. So, I stepped on this god damn thing and you know, of course, it was after we did the show. So, I was feeling pretty
Speaker: I'm going to kill her and I'm going to chop her up and we're going to have Chinese food and blah, blah, blah. Nikki's in the bathroom. She's like, would you stop being a fucking pussy? You step on it.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: It was this one. This is my gorilla tape and Nikki handed me a paper towel. So I looked and I looked like right under, you know, that crease in your big toe all the way across my big toe. I cut it and it's still like it still hurts now. Yeah. So I mean, I've been drinking. So you know, alcohol is a blood thinner. So I'm just doing it. You were literally everywhere.
Speaker: I was bleeding out. So, I just take a paper towel, grab a paper towel around it, take a piece of gorilla tape and you're like, this will get me through this. So, Jeff, you know, we've all made, we've all made that homemade band -aid with it's just toilet paper and electrical tape or duct tape. It's like, I just need to finish what I'm doing. Then I'll go fix this. I just want to bleed all over the bed. That was all. Same thing.
Speaker: Jeff, you know what maps when they make you do that fucking duck walk with like 30 other dudes in your fucking underwear. Yeah. So we all had gotten done doing that. And we're sitting on this bench that's screwed into the wall. And it's creaking down at the other end. And this is the first time I went through meds back in like 2015. Anyway, right, dude, at the end, it's like bouncing up and down, right? You can hear the motherfucking thing creaking.
Speaker: I'm like, you should probably fucking stop. He was like, whatever and fucking kept doing it. And the bench collapsed and I've still got pictures of it on my phone, but I had my foot underneath it and the bench collapsed. It like cut through the back of my heel from the bottom of my calf down to the base of my heel. And there's a little sliver of white where you could see the, my, uh, my Achilles tendon. Yep. I've still got a picture of that. That's the most I've probably ever bled. Talk about a crime scene, dude.
Speaker: Every step I took, there was a puddle. It wasn't like a footprint. It was a puddle. Yeah. And they put they took me back into like some fucking real quick aid room and they started putting shit on it. And I guess I guess Steve from accounting. Your first few days. Yeah. But I guess fucking Steve from accounting was was back there trying to help.
Speaker: Because I heard somebody behind me say, don't put cotton on it. Don't put cotton balls on it. What are you doing? Stop. He was like, oh, OK. And then I heard after they had taped it up, I told you not to put cotton balls on it. So when I finally got it looked at the doctor to see if I needed like any stitches or anything, the dude goes, oh, no.
Speaker: It's like what? It was like, so they put cotton balls on your on your fresh bloody wound. So it's become your scab. Yeah, that is your scab now.
Speaker: And I was like, so so what do we do? He was like, I have to rip it off. Yeah, this is going to suck. Yeah, it was it was less than a day old and this motherfucker grabbed the end of it and was sitting there. It's awkward enough as it is. You're in a room with a bunch of fucking strangers in your hall. Everybody's in their tight white. Yeah. Physical.
Speaker: And then a week later, I had to go back and everybody at maps was like, Oh, we remember you. Like, Oh, it's wrapped up. Like I'm wrapped up like a mummy. Thanks. It's crazy how like you get some like random ass little cut and you know, fucking how much it'll bleed. Dude. Well,
Speaker: I got that big glass door on the balcony upstairs. And I put one of those, it's like a plastic strip that keeps water out at the bottom of the door, you know? I put one of those on it and I used rivets. And one of the holes I drilled, the rivet, because it's an aluminum door, it cracked the glass.
Speaker: And I was like, oh, I'll just get another piece of glass eventually. And then like a week later, Michelle broke the glass, closing the door too hard. And there's a big old chunk there. And I was like, oh, I'll take that out. And I opened the door. And as I turned, I swung my hand down. And I cut out a chunk of my fucking hand that just bled for days. I was just like, it was literally like a quarter inch.
Speaker: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, I was using a table saw one day in Woodshop and I come up. I win. I have the worst injury. No, it's not even about worst injury. It was I because it was it was it was like
Speaker: I've I've had I've had scabs that I've picked that's less damage and but this little bitty cut I'm talking it took off a small section not very deep but it bled so much that I thought I caught my fucking hand off. Now, we uh when I was building houses, I was up on the roof. You know, we were setting the the trusses and we were using nail guns, right? Oh, yeah. And I went to shoot the nail in
Speaker: and it like it it kind of it went at a weird angle so it just went straight through the wood and shot right into my boot. Yeah well you know the most dangerous nail guns out there are the ones that suit those little little penny nails the the brads the finished nails so like yeah it went through my boot thankfully like missed my foot my toes
Speaker: He's a guy on the ground. Dumbass. You shoot yourself with a nail gun while he's nailing while he's using nail to nail framework or whatever. Fuck. Fucking nails. He's looking up laughing at me. He's like, oh, dumbass. Oh, not even. So, I'm going back to the room.
Speaker: I literally watch you should have said I can't my boots and nailed to the roof You know when you use one of those the finishing nail they tell you don't put your finger behind the board even though the nails not long enough it went through the board and through his thumb and
Speaker: And then just landed like an inch and a half away from his thumb after going through a Like three -quarter inch piece of ply and his thumb And he sat there with a hole in his thumbnail going You know what I think we're all safe from impalement because as we've all discussed we all three have very small willies so I'm the biggest
Speaker: I'm just saying, that's the one thing I don't believe. Two and a half millimeters, I believe. The one thing I'm not worried about. Yeah, we're good. That's why I was always okay with Glick getting his fill of what he needed. I can never feel it anyway. He couldn't reach past the cheeks. Pretty much.
Speaker: I just kind of slid around right there in the crevice. Throw it on it, yeah. The worst part was you clean up, honestly. Do you like the duchy and dirty whore? It's a good clean up of yourself. Don't help if you're Harry back there.
Speaker: the the the the
Speaker: Get on the radio. Get on the radio. Out at Trek Gate One, we have a code dirty slut walking back into the building.
Speaker: He does a skit where he's like pretending to masturbate to some music and it's like super intense music and then he goes and it turns into like this this Titanic theme song type deal and he's walking around like
Speaker: oh we've all been there we've all been there after finishing and then looking at ourselves and we're going
Speaker: You're disgusting. You're a dirty slut. Don't even look in the mirror, you dirty bastard. He gets a prostate exam. He's like in there the day after with lipstick. Yeah, wear your makeup, you dirty whore.
Speaker: It's a family guy episode. We're repeating the first prostate exam. And he like totally freaks out on the doctor. He's like in the bathroom mirror with lipstick smeared all over his neck. Pretty, you dirty slut. You're just a whore. Poor lady. I would have broken all these tales about you. Whoa. Make me feel less sorry for myself.
Speaker: I think we should all pinch in and buy her like that jacket. That jacket that I sent her, it literally, it's, I wish I still had the video. Happy birthday from not sensible nonsense. Now you'll be safe. It's a vest that you wear, but if you start falling at a faster rate, it inflates like an airbag. It's for old people.
Speaker: I just want the video of when she falls down the stairs the next time with that thing of plates. And she looks like a bouncing ball bouncing. The funny thing is, it plays up around your head. So it wouldn't really help her if she fell on her ass. So yes, she's going to look like one of her ass. Her ass wouldn't have been bruised anymore. There's like big bubble things that you can get inside of and people play like soccer and football. Why don't we just get her one of those? Yeah, you can just run around in it. Yeah.
Speaker: We can also get her like like a like a value size of the solar eclipse glasses to hand out to people as she's walking down the street. Well, you know, I think he knows exactly how you feel last winter. She took a spill outside of a gas station. She slipped on ice and she went to it right down on her ass, too. She was in so much fucking pain for a while. The tailbone is a bitch.
Speaker: Is it weird I want one of those though? I want to get one into the slam into my kids because they have those which is something similar.
Speaker: They make the ones that you inflate and then there's like, you, you slide them over top of you. Yeah. And look, that's what they look like. I want those. My, uh, my neighbor down in Charleston, he always doing some kind of side hustle, weird side hustle. He bought a bunch of those and he was like, let's try them. And I'm like, okay, we're in the backyard.
Speaker: He's high. I'm drunk. We're just running as fast as we can and slamming. And then he like bounce off of each other and like, oh, this is awesome. Yeah. I like you. What you need is football pants. One of the, one of the padded football girdles, not, not, not Scottish football. Yeah. Football over there. Yeah. They call it rugby.
Speaker: That's a whole nother. I ain't saying shit about them rugby players. They're tough. I'll give them that. They're fucking tough. That is an intense sport and it is fun to watch in person. Honestly, they've just got to be. They've got to be tanks and athletes like you can't be online. I mean, I've seen a couple, but you can't really just be like online, fat, slow and those dudes are fucking quick. Yeah, that is that is a wild sport.
Speaker: Uh, we were talking about it once before on here. And I was saying that my first experience seeing rugby in person was at, at, uh, OSU. We got tickets, uh, cause I didn't know they had a fucking rugby team. They gave us free tickets. So a couple of us guys went over at lunch to watch the game. The game was in the middle of the day and like, Oh, let's go check it out. That and lacrosse lacrosse is kind of crazy too. Not specifically rugby, but there is, there is physicality in lacrosse.
Speaker: Well, the cross has the same downfall. The guys that scare me are the guys that play highlight. They play what? Highlight. Do you remember watching, have you ever watched the Jackass movie? Yes. Yeah. I watched the fish and I was good after that. They actually, they actually, the highlight, it looks like a, a curved arm.
Speaker: And they use a ball that's about the size of a softball and they. Oh yeah, I know. They like the curve thing. They like slide their hand into it. It's almost like they were playing that in one of the American pie movies. Yeah, no, they actually played. They played lacrosse. I lacrosse is the same same downfall that hockey does is only rich kids can play it.
Speaker: Uh, I can agree with that on, on lacrosse, but yeah, I can agree and disagree with hockey. You know, I can absolutely. Hockey is expensive as fuck. It is very expensive, but you know, all sports, if you really look at it, I mean, outside of like baseball and basketball, but I mean, football, soccer, football, play too. I.
Speaker: the fifth
Speaker: When you get to play in high school ball, the ticket fee prices is what pays for the damn, is what pays for all the equipment and shit. Like my parents didn't pay for anything other than our $50 entry fee. And then they had like, uh, they would donate to the whatever fund that they had every year that helped with buses and shit. And that was like it. This is, this is highlight. That's.
Speaker: Oh, yeah, that shit's weird. I mean, when they sling the ball out, it goes up like 120 miles an hour. And when on the one, the one Jackass movie, the they had like Johnny Knox on another guy and then they had real highlight professionals chucking balls at him. I'm like, yeah, you got that. I'm good.
Speaker: There was a, I forget which jackass it is, but they, they have the dude stand in front of the net in hockey with the goalie pads everywhere, except for his nuts. And they have a professional hockey player hit a slap shot at his balls. Dude, those things come out at 105 miles an hour. Yeah. Fuck that. What's, what's shinti? Shinti? Is that like shinti? The fuck is shinti? We're Americans and a Mexican.
Speaker: I was gonna say. I need to spell it. S -H -I -N -T -I -N -T -Y. Oh my God. Don't ask. Call it, Chris. What, Chris? What? Words are hard. Either one of you two can fucking spell it. Shinti is basically field hockey. Oh. From what I'm saying?
Speaker: It's Lily Field Hockey. And I'll show you a picture here. Is field hockey solely a women's sport? No, this picture is dudes playing. Really? She said no it isn't. I'm sorry, does that not look like field hockey to you? That does look like field hockey to me. That looks exactly like field hockey. It's a Scottish.
Speaker: sport, uh, with a stick in a ball. Well, and field. Are you talking about regular hockey or field hockey? Because in regular hockey, it goes in there all the time. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, comparison have been made with field hockey. The two games are several important differences. So apparently in Shinti, the players are allowed to play the ball in the air is one of the main differences. OK. I'm watching video here. Yeah, it looks like field hockey.
Speaker: I was going to say it's like a combination of field hockey and a little bit of rugby because they could, like you said, they can put on the tackle using your body as long as it's shoulder to shoulder. Oh, geez. Oh wow. There was a, there was a hit in the NHL like recently, recently where a dude was falling face first into the boards and he got hit.
Speaker: And there's no elbow, no elbow contact whatsoever, but his chin bounced off the dude's fucking shoulder and took his fucking head off. So when they do the face off of that and that's in that game, Shinti or whatever, right? They go to the center of the field and each person holds their stick up in the air vertically and the ref just throws the ball up in the air and then they just start swinging it.
Speaker: good. So is the ball played in the air like solely? Okay. And they have like short sticks. So if they like hit it up in there, if they hit it up in the air, they can roll it off their chest or whatever. I literally got that right off the, you can copy and paste, but you just,
Speaker: There you go. It is still like field hockey. It's a combination of field. It's very similar. It looks like it was. I I'm out. I'm not gonna play. But yeah, it is. It is actually like you said that like it was sarcasm. It's it's 100%. It is a lot like field hockey. Yeah, there's essentially field hockey, but you can play the ball in the air and it's a little more physical. Well, and the balls look like baseballs. Like they're not like
Speaker: like, you know, I don't I don't know what a field hockey ball looks like, but no, I don't know. These are the sticks and the balls played with Shinti. I'm just saying you get hit with that stick. You're done because none of these guys are wearing pads or anything once again. Fuck that. Nobody wearing a fucking helmet. It is it is exactly what they look special. Oh, good hockey sticks look exactly like that.
Speaker: Yeah, except for their they're more curved. They got that big J at the end. Yeah. Yeah. Feel hockey sticks. Well, I, I, I, not that I have any knowledge, but I thought field hockey sticks were thicker too. They look about thickness, I think, but I think that like the big difference in the stick is like, it does that loop upwards at the, at the tip of the stick. Virginia 2023.
Speaker: Yeah field hockey stick literally it looks This is a field hockey stick, I mean Jesus And drop that comment because you can't see the stick itself look how thick that fucker is It's not that bad I'm just saying you get hit in the head with it Thinking twice about a continuing playing
Speaker: thinking twice about where you're at. But yeah, field hockey in the States is mostly girls. I guess there are a couple guys teams, but I always attribute it to a girls sport.
Speaker: there's ice we're saying shinti is similar and it's basically the same thing as field hockey field hockey the only difference between field hockey and shinti is you can play the ball there on shinti where field hockey and you can be and you can be a little more physical and shinti
Speaker: that's not actual like hockey hockey like ice hockey. Yes, there are two different sports but field hockey which is played on grass and if you watch videos back to back or that's the field hockey player. Yeah. So, yeah, I mean, it's it's very similar. This is this is and to be in basically the
Speaker: They're not the exact same thing, Liggy. That's not what we're saying. Sounds a little similar. You know what? Connor and Jeff, you're right. Fucking women. Thank you. Welcome to the women haters club. Dear Darla, you make
Speaker: The equipment is similar in the gameplay is similar. I just watched videos for both games. Like I said, the biggest difference is field hockey, field hockey. The ball stays on the ground. Shinti and I don't even know if we're saying that right now. I apologize if we're not in the air or on the field or, and actually field hockey is pretty physical too. So yeah.
Speaker: I don't know. I'm just as lost as he is. Hondo. It's hand of seeds. Hondo. Hondo fucks seeds. Oh, that looked like that looked like an O to me. I saw Hondo. Your name makes no goddamn sense, bro. Why are you using Hondo F seeds? Hondo fucks seeds. His middle name is Fitzgerald. Yeah. Hondo Fitzgerald seeds. You know, I'm just you know, I a lot of people that play these two sports.
Speaker: Jesus Christ, they're built like brick shit houses I'll tell you what is I tell you what we can all agree on ain't none of us whether on the panel or in the chatters box playing either one of those games Oh hell no I'm about as big as one of those sticks. Let's be honest Guys I broke my stick give me Jeff
Speaker: Like that. They use the fucking flamingos as croquet mallets. I'm good. Hondo, to answer your question, the only thing that matters is that if I do play any professional sport,
Speaker: I will be, I won't know. You know what? I'm not mad at that. No, but I would be the Nigel Gruff of that sport. I don't know who the **** Nigel Gruff is. I got to smoke it on the field. The the object of the game is to smack a ball down the field and to get it into a net or if you're on ice, you're good on the ice and you smack a puck into a net. That's the object of the game. Soccer. You kick a soccer ball down the field and get it into a net.
Speaker: That's the point. Facts. All games, all these games have the same concept. Yeah, in that way, kind of like football. Field hockey because we're comparing field hockey to shinty. You goofy Scottish sons of bitches. Listen here, Deborah. You and your husband, William Wallace. Exactly.
Speaker: That's fucking hockey. Well, every sport has different rules. If I play baseball, I can't tackle a guy like I can in freaking football. But the concept of the game, they aren't similar. That's like saying rugby and football are similar. Hockey and lacrosse are actually really similar when it comes to rules and the gameplay itself. But it quits wise in the way that it is. Oh, my gosh.
Speaker: You're you're you're you're you're you're thinking too much. 1776 Leggy. I think basketball is the same as soccer, except they allowed to have the ball in the air. They are the same. I mean, they are very similar. They are so pointless. You don't understand. Leggy's getting mad. You have your head around the fact that. OK, first of all,
Speaker: What is, what has Scotland ever done for the world? Give us that music and a couple cool accents. We were comparing field hockey to, to, to, to Shinti and said they were kind of similar. We didn't say they were the same. You were wrapped up in hockey and I'm assuming because we have ice hockey in the States. We have ice hockey and field hockey. So for talking, you can't just say.
Speaker: You can't say hockey because that's two different sports. Hockey and hockey are two different sports with different rules, but the same objective. TV, telephone, penicillin. Is that it? Three things? Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone. He might have maybe been from Scotland, but I'm pretty sure he was in a marriage when he did it.
Speaker: That's that's like that's like saying how long do we have in all honesty? I mean the only person that's really grateful for penicillin is the whore down at the bottom I Like the way she spelled it too she emphasized the beat Like I know that's the correct spelling, but I've never seen no not I've never seen none that's spelled with the B. I
Speaker: I've never seen a spell that was always. You know, Connor, I used to be a smart guy. Oh, no. No, I should. What from the Air Force to the Air Force? I'm a comedian, American, inventor of the telephone. Guess what? My heritage comes from Germany. I'm not fucking German. I'm fucking stupid, but I'm not fucking German.
Speaker: I feel like I feel like you're going to have an argument again. Just sit back and enjoy. I feel like Cal Nautin or Ricky Bobby talking to Jean Girard. Well, what did America ever do for the world? Chinese food. Chinese food. Saves your French asses from the Germans. That's what we did. Come out and get it. Get it.
Speaker: Inventor scientist engineer who was credited for patenting the first practical television. He also co -founded American and a telegraph company in 1885, now known today as AT &T, which can go fuck themselves. Yeah. Chris's phone bill. Oh, that's the reason she's pumping her chest out because she's from Edinburgh. That's all. Oh my God. He was born in Edinburgh.
Speaker: Yeah. And he hated it so much. He moved to Canada. Hey, the link got dropped. You better bring your ass. You're starting with Chris. The guy, the guy had the guy had triple citizenship, man. The UK, Canada and the United States. Guess what? He was an American when he made the telephone. So suck it, bitch. He's American. That for Americans invented the telephone. You're welcome.
Speaker: That was Philo T. Farnsworth demonstrated his electronic television to reporters at his San Francisco, California laboratory. He was a Scottish inventor, but it was created in San Francisco. America!
Speaker: Penicillin I just I love this comment this comment makes me so happy What are you gonna do about it couldn't do shit in 1776 Alexander Fleming
Speaker: was a Scottish physician, scientist who... Yeah, I'll give her penicillin. He discovered it. That's not invented. Oh, actually, it was Kenjiro Takayakanagi, who... But he discovered it. And the development of television. Not even Scottish. Not even American. Fucking Japanese. And the dude that discovered penicillin, he did it in London.
Speaker: Yeah, that's pretty much Scottish people. Yeah, but it wasn't in Edinburgh. We'll give her that one. She gets technical on a technicality because technically, yeah. There was actually four inventors for the television. I saw that. Filo Farnsworth, John Logie Bard. I like him.
Speaker: Techaganagi and Charles Francis Jenkins. Jenkins is definitely from the States. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Charles Francis Jenkins was an American engineer who was a pioneer of early cinema and one of the inventors of the television. Guess where he was born and raised at? Oh, bitches. There you go. America. Oh, let's get.
Speaker: New Scottish inventors, one Chinese fuck and one American and only one of them matters. It's not the Scottish one. John Loki was actually born in Ellenberg, United Kingdom. Doesn't sound very Scottish to me. It doesn't sound very Scottish to me. I'm just saying. It does says that he was a
Speaker: He was a Scottish inventor, electrical engineer who invented, who invented, innovator, demonstrating the world's first live, live working television system. The other, the other dude that I said, I guess he came out with the first color television. Yeah, I was going to say they still did it in black and white.
Speaker: They were racist. They were racist because they were black and white. One out of three is not bad. Don't get me started on British expansion. Then you get one out of four. Not bad. America.
Speaker: She's getting dressed to come on the show since you started talking shit. Tell me we're fucking thin skinned in America. We're not thin skinned, we're just the champs. Don't worry about Vietnam, Korea or Afghanistan, but we're the champs. What the fuck's a fire brigade?
Speaker: You're going to take credit because somebody was like, you know, we should put a group of people in a building just in case other buildings catch on fire. That way they can run out there and throw water on it. Yeah. How should we do it? Buckets. Yeah. Anesthetic. Do you think there's a. You know what? We'll find this out right now. Don't be angry. Don't go away mad. Just go away.
Speaker: sometimes and it was little it's just a casual conversation saying that two sports were similar and he wanted to argue with me and I'm not Tony, you know, you know, I'm you know, I'm a stubborn, hard -headed son of a bitch too. So, just like you, we're like two Billy Goats that want to bram our heads together. Can I have a microphone and you don't?
Speaker: I have. Yeah. Earth till Holly Junior came out with the fire hydrant. That's a fire. You're welcome. Fire brigade. Fire brigade. I'm going to do in a bucket each other. No, this could be enough. Could be enough. I'm laughing and joking. Could be in a fucking dick, Chris. It's OK, Deborah. It's OK. We're still all friends.
Speaker: Maybe it's just because you're tired and in pain that you think I'll be in a fucking dick. I'm just being the same guy I always am. All the differences. You're arguing with these two idiots. The differences is now you you've aimed at her as opposed to anybody else. A new challenger has entered the arena. The actual challenger compared to you two because it's very easy to fact check and prove both you goofy bastards wrong.
Speaker: Did you know that you can put a loaded shotgun to your head, pull the trigger and live? Fact check it real quick. Why don't you demonstrate that for me, Carl? Unfortunately, I don't own a shotgun. Stop being a dick. I'm just having a good time. I'm sorry. Just poo poo out on America. It's not that bad. Just because you had one bad experience with some, you know, a couple of assholes from America doesn't mean we're all bad. No reason to just stay on your island.
Speaker: Jeff and Connor are your bad experiences. I'm sorry. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Whoa. Listen, listen here. We're white. We're the only good experiences in America. I went to the chamfering. Let it be known.
Speaker: Well, good night. Hopefully, you get some rest. I hope you're okay. This is what we do. We
Speaker: We're not any better than the assholes that we shit on all the time that we make. We are. We're just we're just upfront about it, let's be honest. And we do it. It's all in good. It's all in jest. Yes, it's all it's all in good humor. It's all just having fun and in good taste. Life's not that serious. We're going to have fun and poke the bear from time to time. You know, if you take life too serious,
Speaker: You're going to lose because nobody gets out alive. Speak for yourself. Oh, you're going to live forever. I play it on it. Would you want to, though? You're doing a good job so far, Jeff. No, but honestly, if I could live till the end of the world, then yes. Like, like once. OK, yeah, that's close to blowing. You know, we're done. But let's say let's say you got craziness. You become one of the vampires from True Blood.
Speaker: I would, but try to be like, uh, like an immortal with Highlander. Okay. Okay. You, you become a Highlander immortal. Do you really want to live more than a couple thousand years? Yes. Be low. I mean, I wouldn't be lonely on the planet. There's got to be a certain point where you realize like, like you come to the acceptance of you're going to meet people. 110, 15, 110, 115 years.
Speaker: everybody that you know right now is dead. You do have to be careful because there is that off chance that you wind up sleeping with one of your great, great, great grandkids. There is that. I mean, at a certain point, though, like it's okay. Not even not even your great grandkids like your, your second time grandkids because you know, you got to keep moving because you haven't aged. Milk and never come back.
Speaker: after a certain point. I think if I was going to be in a relationship with somebody and if I was still able to have kids or whatever, you know, as an immortal, if I was going to be in a relationship with somebody, you know, to the point where I was going to marry him and I'd be like, uh, kind of, kind of, kind of let you in on a little secret. Um, I'm going to stay this way forever. I'm never going to age. Uh, I'm not going to die. Uh, you're going to die. Um, imagine how well that conversation would go to your significant other. By the way, I'm not going to die. I'm sure you are, buddy.
Speaker: okay okay well you know and then when she's 80 and in a home and i'm sitting there looking the same motherfucker i tried to tell you you're gonna walk like told you so bitch for the first time in history a man was writing an argument with a woman i was right
Speaker: As much as it would be, I think for the first couple of hundred years, it'd be kind of cool. But after a while, it's just boring. Really? Because just think about, well, first and foremost, think about this. Say like you find out you're an immortal in like 1492.
Speaker: OK. And you're like you catch fucking monkey pox or something coming across. I don't even know if that was a thing back then. I'm just throwing stuff up. I'm just throwing shit at the wall. You die of monkey pox on the on the Santa Maria on the way over here. And then you like then you like get over here. They're getting ready to bury you and you wake up and it's like, well, that was what happened. Why is everybody looking to be like that? What's going on? You know, and then you've realized that you find out that you're a mortal.
Speaker: 1492 up to 2024 think of all the historical right and whatnot that you have right well the thing is about being immortal and they brought this up in the twilight series is that once you get to a certain point money is not an issue
Speaker: Right because you know something you bought in 1492 is now worth a couple hundred million, you know You auction that off now you're set. You don't have to worry about money. I have a side -out. We have Christopher Columbus. Yeah photo selfie I Have a barrel from the boss money Money's not gonna be an obstacle after a couple hundred years, right, you know
Speaker: the biggest problem would be loneliness. Because you're literally gonna have the same conversation four billion times. I don't care. But you're not necessarily gonna be, but here's the cool thing.
Speaker: Well, not really this whole thing, but kind of a downer, because everybody around you is going to eventually die. You're going to see your kids and their kids and all that stuff die. And you're going to be at the funeral going, yeah, I'm still 40. But you also have the ability over X amount of years, you're going to gain infinite amounts of knowledge and wisdom from and you're going to know everything about the history of the world. I get that. Well, I mean, maybe not everything, but you're going to have these experiences
Speaker: that everyone in your current age didn't have and knowledge and wisdom and things that you can pass on to help the world. Do you think I'm going to help the world? I'm helping my pocket. I mean, I mean, I would. Yeah, but once again.
Speaker: Let's say, let's be craziness, craziness, boredom. That's the biggest problem. Because I don't think there's supermanness as much as boredom. The concept of Superman is Superman can't die. Well, so now I'm bored and I can't die. So then I just find I like I like one day just because I'm bored, I throw myself off the Empire State Building. Knowing that I'm going to wake back up. Yeah, but I mean, well, we saw heroes, heroes were Hayden Penn and Tara's character. She couldn't die.
Speaker: So like she literally attempted suicide like 400 times because of which I just watched boss level again today. It's so good. I love that goddamn movie. The ending is terrible. The movie we go. Yeah, the ending was kind of like, yeah, it's like weak sauce. It's like shit ending. Amazing beginning. You guys just literally get dressed, dodging bullets, dodging the guy who's got coffee like the fucking genius.
Speaker: No, if I was immortal, I would want it to be like Deadpool though. Like everything's still really fucking hurts and you can still lose limbs and shit, but they just grow back really slowly. Like I said that I watch Highlander or the movie Highlander. So you're a mortal and the only way you die is if somebody, you know, is in other, other immortals, they fight each other for, you know, whatever it's for. But, but, but.
Speaker: But so if I'm out in the street and somebody mugs me and they shoot me in the head, I die, but then I just come back to life. They still die, but they just come back to life. They don't stay dead. I was watching Smallville the other day because I'm rewatching Smallville. And at one point somebody tells him or some lady can protect him. She literally sees him at the end of the world and he's by himself.
Speaker: Well, yeah, I mean, you know, but I think when the world ends and say, like Connor said, if the fucking Earth just implodes or whatever or explodes or whatever happens, I think even if you're an immortal, you're more than likely going to be gone because what are you just going to be floating out in space? Well, no, but even if the world ends like like a nuclear blast kills everybody on Earth, the Earth is still there. So you're just wandering around with.
Speaker: Hey look, an iPad, you know. Even if you lived till the end of the world, which would be the ideal way to be immortal, end of the world, because then you're not, you know. The travel you'd be able to do would be amazing. I mean, you could literally spend 50 years in the States, 50 years in Mexico, 50 years in Canada, 50 years in Edinburgh, you know, all over. You know, that was cool.
Speaker: And and yeah, you would definitely get laid alive. You know, you talk about getting the record. But once again, everybody that you care about, because regardless of what you do, you're going to run into people that sucks. You're going to run into people that you you eventually like and care about. You're going to have to watch them die. I don't have to watch them die, but they're going to die. You know, they're going to die. That's what I'm saying. That's that's kind of the shittiest thing about it. He's like, deuces, I'll bury you tomorrow, bitch.
Speaker: No, I'm not saying that would suck because I would 100 % suck. I mean, like if you, if you, you know, like Nikki and I meet, I know that, you know, 40, 45 years from now, she's probably going to be gone and I got to watch her. Meanwhile, I'm just this guy, just still this guy, always this guy. Yeah. I mean, yeah, that would, but at the same time, much like
Speaker: but like police officers and firefighters and people in the first responders and people in the medical field and stuff like that, you kind of become numb. You get used to it. They always say that it's amazing the things you can get used to. Yeah. Of course, it still hurts, but it gets easier. And then you eventually become
Speaker: you know, this is just a normal part of life, but I would absolutely I would love to be immortal. I think it'd be cool. But like, it'd be interesting, interesting to see where mankind goes. Because, as you said, from 1492 to today, the technology jumps and stuff like that. I mean, like I said, after after first couple 100 years, money's easy. Yeah, exactly. You know, you can predict the stock market like you read about.
Speaker: Yeah and you know but the the concept of the loneliness you know it's it's like the like I said about Superman he can't tell everybody hey by the way no I'm Superman so I think I think it would be you would you would
Speaker: Probably if, if you got, if your secret got out that you're a mortal, everybody in that brother is going to be trying to capture you and figure out why you're a mortal. So they can be a mortal too. So it's something you'd have to keep a secret, right? Well, I think, I think, which is why you'd have to move around all the time. I think to a certain degree, but at the end of the day, you're going to have to own the world. Yeah. You're going to have to move around in general.
Speaker: because, you know, if I stay here in Ohio and I find out I'm a mortal and I've been here in Ohio since 1981 and then we're at fucking 20 81 and I haven't aged a bit since right now, you know, people are going to notice or people are, you know, like most of the people are going to be gone, but like their kids and stuff, they're going to go, you know, not only that, your picture is going to be somewhere.
Speaker: you know, high school pictures and stuff like that. He looks just like did a high school. All right. But yeah, I think the concept would be cool. But after a while, I think it would get old. I think it'd be cool. And it'll be something that, you know, like I said, I could definitely travel alone.
Speaker: I mean, you do, you do like 20 years where you just travel like Reacher. Yeah. Just think of, just think of the, uh, you know, like I said, if you were able to, to reproduce or whatnot, just think of how many people, like I said, at some point you're going to accidentally bang your like great, great, great, great. Well, on top of that is what not out there. Well, even let's say you can't reproduce, but.
Speaker: you'll eventually have enough money where you're bored and you just start buying properties and eventually you could own the world. You buy every property. I don't even own the world because no, but like if you buy every property in Ohio, every single property through like convincing somebody to will it to you or you know, you become the head of a company because you're super smart because you've been alive for two, three, 400 years.
Speaker: So you know the law better and you can literally figure out a way where now I own your company, I own your business, I own the property, your business sits on. So eventually you own all of Ohio. Now you're done with Ohio. You will do some nefarious stuff. Oh, of course I would. You are 100%. Absolutely. If you're a mortal or a human or you're absolutely a villain. I am bizarro Superman tomorrow. You are 100 % a goddamn villain. Oh yeah. I'm going to take over the world.
Speaker: Yeah, but if I if I like if tomorrow I got all of Superman's powers, oh yeah, I'm taking over the world Yeah, but you do something stupid where you didn't check yourself with fucking kryptonite and kill yourself No, but once again bizarro Superman has all the Superman's powers, but he's not affected by kryptonite at all He's also retarded well, that's true
Speaker: He doesn't have the brain to be he's not he doesn't have the brain power to go, you know that's what I'm saying if you had if you had all the Superman's abilities and You were just as smart as Clark Kent blah blah blah and you had and of course kryptonite actually doesn't exist Nothing affects you all the positives of Superman none of the natives You could take over the world in like three weeks
Speaker: I could take over the world in 24 hours, but it doesn't mean I would. Yeah, but you... Who's gonna stop me? Exactly, who's gonna stop you? But no, not yet. No, I'm not. That's not in my game plan of taking... I don't think I would want it. I wouldn't want it. I wouldn't want it. But what is it? Oh my gosh.
Speaker: Yeah, it's poison. You chased it first. I did. I wasn't sure how I was going to feel about it, but I'm out of vodka, so. Oh, you put the honey in there. Yeah, that's what that is. So I don't think it's terrible.
Speaker: Well, too, I mean, had too strong for me, but it's not bad. No. Yeah. That's what I put a little bit of the honey Jack Daniels with, uh, Oh, my excuse. Uh, with, uh, some tea and just, just a little bit before we started the show. Yeah. I like it. Yeah. Well, I wouldn't, I would go a little bit lighter on the honey personally and the Jack Daniels. I think that's me.
Speaker: So it tastes pretty good. I don't even like you. You're going to kill that whole top tonight. This is only my third one. I mean, I drank the one earlier and then I drank the one with vodka, but then there wasn't the vodka left. Oh, I didn't realize that. Goodbye, Jeff. You want to bring me a beer? If not, I'll come and get it. No, I, uh,
Speaker: Yeah. I don't, I don't have that, that, um, that, uh, Oh Jesus Christ. I don't have that, uh, that nefarious tree or whatever. Like Jeff where Jeff's initial thought is I could never die and I have all the Superman's powers. I'm taking over the world. I don't have that. I just want to, I just, I just want to live my life and do whatever the hell I want.
Speaker: Have fun. Don't go out. Did you eat the cheese sticks? I didn't eat anything. I didn't have. Where's the big pizza box at? I think I put everything in the little box. Apparently I cleaned up stuff last night. Oh, okay. I just, I didn't. Yeah. Cause there was nothing in the box. I took all the trash out today. There was nothing in that box. Oh, well if you didn't clean it up, then you'll eat them last night.
Speaker: But no, I think I cleaned everything. There's another, there's a little box. Yeah. That has the Stromboli bites. Yeah. I think it's got the cheese sticks in it. I just ate a bunch of sweet pickles. Yeah. I think the cheese sticks and everything. Okay. Well, you can have those after you're done. Okay. Apparently Jeff's interwebs went down. So he's got to go, he's got to go change out his, he's got to go change out his hamster.
Speaker: uh Which is like dip I don't even know what the hell happened to Connor Connor just left We're not in the middle of doing anything here. I'll just leave Give the guy give the guy, you know, quote -unquote promotion Tom. Hey, man, you're a part of the show now now he shows up late Disappears in the middle of the show Lord have mercy
Speaker: Okay, sorry I had the random immediate urge to shit Random immediate urge to shit. We call those proper Nikki and I call those poop emergencies. It was very much so I was sitting here talking and I was like, I think I kind of have to fart I let a fart go and I was like, I'm gonna shit my fucking pants you're reaching that lovely age my friend where I
Speaker: It's dangerous to trust a fart several times a day. I'm like, is that a photo? I'm going to shoot myself. Let's go sit on the toilet just to be safe. Oh, I do that anyway. Most of the time, but if I'm on the podcast, I can test the part usually try not to, especially when I've been drinking or depending upon what I've been eating. Last thing I want to do is trust a fart. See, I don't have that issue till the next day. If I've been drinking.
Speaker: If I've been drinking the do the beer shits are real man, dude certain certain beers will fucking Not all beers, but there's certain beers out there that like like for instance Like they like the Like sheep ears Yeah, like bush
Speaker: or, uh, even Miller, even Miller does it to me. Miller doesn't do it. Uh, Budweiser. That was another one of the reasons that I stopped drinking Budweiser Budweiser. The next day, man, it was, it was bad. It was rough, but like Bushlight, uh, uh, I was, uh, uh, Miller High Life. Mm -hmm.
Speaker: and I I drink but I the next day, it's a bro. You ain't leaving the house because you can't be too far from a toilet. It's oh god. Should I say this or no? I mean, we've said a lot worse. I will say how long ago was it now? Fucking four years probably now. Five years. There's two two or three years before I got out of the Air Force and switched over to the army. Um
Speaker: I was having some some tummy issues. There was blood showing up where it shouldn't after I went to the bathroom. There shouldn't be any blood when showing up when you go to the bathroom. I mean, you know, there's there's a rare occasion after a wild night with the boys where you might have a little. I've never had that never had that. Oh, yes, because you got a big box because you're a whore. Well, no, it's because I taper it right. You start with the little plug.
Speaker: And then you go up a size and then up a size. You got little plugs. Yeah. Your, your medium plug. Oh, nice. You gave me a medium. I like that. Blood was showing up places. I shouldn't. And so I had to get a colonoscopy.
Speaker: that anywhere in the
Speaker: but like super, super heavy in salt. So when you drink it, it's like drinking ocean water mixed with Gatorade. Wow. And you have to, you have to chug like fucking a court every 30 minutes, something like that. And on top of that, and on top of that, you take laxatives and you're not allowed to eat or drink or you're not allowed to eat anything you can drink, but you can't eat anything for X amount of hours. And as soon as you start like the, the prep process, you can't eat anything.
Speaker: And like the first one or two poops that I had during this prep process, I was like, okay, you know, like this is kind of what I expected. And I didn't realize eventually what comes out of you is the liquid. And it's not like, it's not Brown. It's, it's not like you're pooping. It is just fluid. Oh, I slept in the bathroom.
Speaker: I slept in the fucking bathroom. Dude, I couldn't make it from my bedroom to the toilet fast enough. And every time I would go to lay back down, I would immediately just shoot back up. I'm going to shit my fucking pants because it's just water. It's just water running through your fucking dials.
Speaker: and
Speaker: The actual like procedure or whatever you want to call it the scoping or whatever. They put me under for that, which is, which is good because I guess when my dad had his, which he had his the same year that I had mine, which is depressing. When he had, he said he remembers everything. I was like, nah. So serious question.
Speaker: How big around is the little scope or camera or whatever they? It's probably this thin. OK. The cord is. Yeah, the cords probably only about that thin. And I mean, the camera is not much bigger. I mean, like, like the camera, the camera looks like that kind of like about that size. So they're not like showing this asshole. No, no, no, no. But the thing is, no, but like.
Speaker: I do remember being very intimidated because they grabbed the scope and it's, it's enormous. Like it's just so fucking long. Yeah. It's so fucking long, which I mean, I understand it has to be, but oh God, I just, it's not even the colonoscopy itself. Like it's the prep. It's drinking that nasty shit.
Speaker: That sounds horrendous. And I've heard those horror stories. And is it true when you go to that doctorate office, there's just a bunch of people and they're just barking up a storm. Yeah. So like when you, when you get out, because the way that they do the colonoscopy, they pumped air into your, into your bowel so that, so that they can see better. Expand it. So right. Okay. So they pumped air into your bell. So when you get out of the procedure room or whatever, you have to fart, they won't leave, let you leave until you fart and you stop farting.
Speaker: And I don't remember me farting at all. But I've asked my wife about it, and she's like, oh yeah, oh yeah, you farted a lot. But it was, you couldn't smell anything. Like it didn't stink. Yeah. Well, yeah, because I washed out my insides last night. Yeah, because I pushed everything out of the goddamn body. There's nothing left!
Speaker: Yeah, I mean, it's like when you when you when you blow up a balloon and you let the air out of it and you pull the side so it either squeals or it makes that Yeah, that's exactly what's happening. There's a whole bunch of dudes hanging out I Remember going back and I could hear I could hear the the symphony Yeah
Speaker: I know that, so Bill Engvald does a joke on it, or does a bit about it. And he's, it's hysterical. Oh God. Yeah. He wakes up and asks his wife, did I, did I fart? She's like, like a bullfrog getting run over by a semi.
Speaker: Well, because what possesses you to go into that medical field like as a nurse, like, you know, obviously, we need those doctors, whatever. But a nurse, you know, and I'm assuming there's both male and female nurses, but as a female nurse, what would the money's got to be good? Yeah, because exactly what it is. Like, so
Speaker: I can't go do a colonoscopy and there'd be like a little nurse there. And she's like, Hey, by the way, we're going to shove this up your ass today. And you're going to be farting a lot. I'm like, Oh, I'm not either. Yep. Well, so I was, it's natural. I had my, my appointment or whatever scheduled a week before or a week after it actually got done because I had a, I had an issue happen where bleeding more than I should have.
Speaker: Um, so I, I, I went to the ER and they were like, yeah, well call your, call your gastroenterologist and let them know what happened. We're going to send them the notes, all this and the other. And he was like, okay, you're scheduled for tomorrow, but it won't be me. And the doctor was a female and I was like,
Speaker: That's fine with me. But like how do you enjoy this job? Yeah You're shoving cameras up dudes asses to check for colon cancer and and GI issues Like it's it's the same as like respectfully men getting into gynecology Yeah, like it's just you're you're you're going there to look that fucked up cooter Not everything's gonna be sunshine's and roses. No Some shit's gonna be old methanie from down on the corner
Speaker: You're going to need some Febreze for that room. Not all. Yeah. It's not, it's not all. Yeah. I remember, I remember like growing up in here and I think Jeff was one of these guys was like, I'm going to be a gynecologist. And I'm like thinking to myself, like, you know, women just don't go to the gynecologist because every, I mean, I know they have their checkups and they're, you know, and like when they're pregnant and shit. Yeah.
Speaker: But but you know, they're not always going there for the good stuff. There's a lot more cases of the there's a reason There's a reason there are pictures of blue waffles on the internet. Yeah, not to mention the fact that you're gonna be dealing with people of all Shape size shape sizes and ages yeah ages some people don't Take care of their down their region and this goes for men too because there's some men out there That y 'all better fucking step up or take you gotta take care of your downstairs region
Speaker: Mm -hmm. Speaking of which I do need to do some landscaping. I've been kind of lackadaisical lately. Dude, I don't get too deep into it, but after my back surgery, I had some issues. Don't worry. Nobody's ever accused you of getting too deep. That was good. But I was having some issues. I had to go to the urologist. I have an issue peeing amongst other issues.
Speaker: uh but i couldn't void my bladder completely and it was it's really bad for you apparently anyway getting all that gross shit all that waste and stuff is still sitting in there and it can lead to a whole lot of issues and yeah they were worried about it for the longest time um but i went to go get checked out and my urologist was a female and that made me so uncomfortable because
Speaker: when you go to
Speaker: But it was one of the most uncomfortable experiences of my life, because she's like, all right, let me see what you got going on. Make sure that I have to inspect them. It's their equivalent of a regular examination by a regular physician. They have to check for lumps, nodes, all the things to make sure you don't have bulk cancer or anything. And it just felt so wrong.
Speaker: And I pulled my dick and balls out and she's sitting there like fondling each testicle. And I'm like, Oh my God, I gotta know she's just doing her fucking job. And put the end of the end of the appointment came and she was like, you know, because of the issues you're having, technically I should do a prostate exam. I was like,
Speaker: She's like, but you're really young. I don't think you have prostate cancer. I think that it's because of your spinal issues. And I was like, yeah, I'd say so. She's like, I'm going to leave it up to you. Do you want me to check your prostate or no? And I was like, fuck no. You're not going to shove a finger at my ass. That is the one thing that I have not. Well, I mean, I've not had a lot of things done, but I am not a fan of the whole idea of a doctor shoving their finger at my ass and feeling around.
Speaker: Especially weird if you got a male doctor and he's doing a prostate exam and then he has both hands on his shoulder Although I will say that Before I like a two or three weeks before my spine surgery. I had a issuer. I got out of the car and I
Speaker: I went to close the corridor or something and everything from my waist down went numb. And if you lose feeling in your genitals or in your rear end, you have to go to the ER because if you, if you lose feeling there, it can, and there's a, there's a,
Speaker: One of your discs is like pushing on that nerve. It can cause nerve damage and make it so that you have incontinence issues and you can't hold your shit in for the rest of your life. So I went to the doctor just kind of thinking, oh, they're going to take a CT scan, do all this other stuff, you know, and check me out. And the first thing the dude says is you can't feel below your waist. And I was like, it's starting to come back. He was like, okay, I have to do a digital rectal tone.
Speaker: exam, which in my head, I'd never heard of that. I heard digital and I thought to myself, okay, so he's going to have like a computer or something in here and he's going to like ultrasound my butthole because I heard tone and digital. And then I was like rectal. So it's got something to do with my ass. Like as long as he's not sticking something in my ass, like whatever. And he came back in five minutes later with gloves and lube.
Speaker: And he was like, I'm going to make this real quick. Believe me. I don't want to do this either. And he shoved his finger in my ass. And he was like, as soon as he put it in, he was like, yep, nope, you're good. I was like, Oh, bro. Hey. Apparently what a digital rectal tone exam is, essentially they stick their finger in your ass and make sure that your sphincter still tightens.
Speaker: Yeah, because if it doesn't, that means that you have no control over what's going on down there and it's emergency surgery like right then and there. You've done a lot of shit in your ass in the last couple of years. Oh my God. I'm done. I'm so done. I'm retiring from the anal game. I'm officially retired from what? What is it you're trying to get in there, Connor?
Speaker: I retire from the anal game. I can't do it no more. The problem was he didn't really explain what the digital rectal tone exam was. He just said he was going to do one. And I'll give him props. He did it quick. But my assumption was it was nothing was being inserted and I was wrong.
Speaker: So there was a there was a slight level of panic when he like When you get a chance you've got to watch the the family guy episode where he gets the prostate exam
Speaker: Well, I'm sure we'll get there. We started watching family gotta go to bed at night. What's going on? Jeez Jeez You just missed it. We were talking about anal probing Jeez if you would like to if you scroll up and maybe if you scroll up in the comments forget about it You can You could join us if you'd like to come hang out
Speaker: But so yeah, I forget how we got all this conversation topic, but, Oh yeah. Yeah. We were going, we went from, uh, from beer shits to the worst shits of my life, which was the, which was the colonoscopy and then shit getting shoved up my ass by a guy, by a guy, dinner, at least. All right. Come on, man. Oh my God. It was, it was panicked for a quarter second.
Speaker: You made me feel like a dirty whore up in here. Oh, God. But any Jew. Whoa. Whoa. And it didn't help that my urologist went to, I mean, you'll love it, but my urologist went to U of M. Nice. And I was like, is that where you graduated medical school? And she was like, yeah.
Speaker: That is awesome. Insult to injury. Man, they're for Buckeye. We got something for you. We're going to need the big camera. They walk in with a camera. Like eight inches in diameter. We're going to have to cut his balls off.
Speaker: Uh, and, uh, unfortunately, sorry, we are, we can't put you under like we normally do. And we're all out of the lube. So we're just going to spit on it and hope for the best. Whoa. Hey, what are you doing with my asshole? This, I thought this was a urologist. Yeah. Yeah. See we're in, uh, Ohio state shirt today. You're a fan of the Buckeyes, huh?
Speaker: born and raised. I felt like such an, I felt like such an idiot, uh, one day in Texas. And you know, when you're in different States, there's something about seeing someone wearing a collegiate football t -shirt that's either Ohio state or Michigan or somebody that, you know, and enjoy, or that your rivals with. Yeah. I was like in line at a fucking Chipotle in El Paso, Texas. And the dude behind me had a Michigan t -shirt on. And I was like, I was like,
Speaker: man. I was going to tell you, you had nice shoes and then I saw your shirt realize you need to go change, dude. He was like, what? I was like, your shirt. He was like, what about my shirt? I was like, I'm an Ohio State fan. I was born in Columbus, you know, all this out in the other. It was like, how'd you make it out here? He was like,
Speaker: the the
Speaker: I just like the shirt. I like the lightning. There are a few Metallica songs that I like. There's a, you know, I just, I just, there's just fucking clowns. They're assholes. There are a few songs that I do like. I just, you know, I grew up a mega death fan. I'm an iron maiden fan, you know, and Metallica is not,
Speaker: I'm sorry, but they're just not, they're fucking sellouts are what they are. I like their music. I don't necessarily need to like the person though. Yeah. Well, I don't know. Their music is just fucking commercialized rock music at the end of the day. They literally, if you listen to it, it's almost sounds the same, but, uh, what really rubbed me the wrong way. And you're probably too young to remember this with the whole Napster thing. And they're like,
Speaker: You're taking money out of our pockets and we're going to sue everybody. It was like, yeah, you're fucking millionaires. Shut up. Who cares if somebody steals your music? I hate the drummer. He's not even a drummer. I just, Lars is such a fucking douchebag. James Headfield is mediocre at best as a singer. Yeah. You know, I just, like I said, I, you know, I'm more of a fan of Megadeth and I like Metallica for the cut yourself songs.
Speaker: like like fade to black like uh dude that song is great that if the if the listen to the lyrics and know what they're talking about is insane for which one i think it's one where like i gotta i gotta look it up again uh what the hell are the lyrics uh i'll look it up real quick lost my sight what the hell
Speaker: It's like it's about like a soldier who like steps on a landmine or yeah Like Renee or some shit like that can't remember anything can't tell if this is true or a dream deep down inside I feel a screw game terrible silence stops me Now that the war is through with me. I'm waking up. I cannot see That there's nothing there's not much left of me Nothing real about nothing real but pain now. I
Speaker: Oh, God, please wait me crazy. I mean, yeah, that's that's that's why I like one. And I like like Fade to Black is one is probably my favorite Metallica song. I know it's kind of cliche, but I love it. And I love Anderson man, too. But I like Master of Puppets. Yeah.
Speaker: you know what the black album was everybody's like yeah what's your favorite metallic album the black album really why because that's what everybody says fair enough i can respect that answer there's some jackass trying to explain to me why they like the black album and it's not going to make me believe them anymore i don't know Metallica well enough to know their album covers
Speaker: I know a few songs and I like it. I like a few of their songs and that's about it. But like, I think Master of Puppets was a cool album, not a bad album, decent songs. And I think they had Ride the Lightning, I think. Ride the Lightning was one of their album covers, yeah. Which was like... That song is actually called Metallica. That song is Fire. What's that? Ride the Lightning.
Speaker: Yeah. It was all about a dude about to fucking hop in the electric chair. That was an album. It was all over the radio. Yeah, exactly. Well, not only that, but I mean, that was about the time that they, because you had master puppets, which was awesome. And then you had the blackout and they had 72 seasons and inner salmon, sad, but true wherever I may roam.
Speaker: Nothing else matters of Wolf and man Those were probably the biggest ones off that album Yeah, so yeah it was that was about the time that they just for me in my opinion completely fucking sold out and just went and
Speaker: because they had Ride the Lightning and the Master of Puppets and Injustice for All, which was awesome. Kill them all was a decent album. And then after Injustice for All, they did the fucking Black album. And that was about the time that they started to really sell out, in my opinion. And they come out with, you know, they did the Black album and what it was like.
Speaker: Yeah. It was, it was years later. I mean, it was like five years later they came out with load and then they did reload, which was, I just got a fan of Metallica man. And I don't know if it's just because I was always more of a mega death fan. And then, you know, Dave Mustang just kills me because he looks like a little, like a little Catholic church boy with his long red hair and shit. Like he does not look like a heavy metal musician at all.
Speaker: But then he started saying it was like, holy shit. And I don't think there was a mega death album that I did not like. I honestly don't know if I could, I could name a single mega death song.
Speaker: Oh yeah, I think you I think you would know. Symphony Symphony of Destruction. That's probably one of their most popular songs. Angry. Your trust was really popular. My favorite song by them is and I know I'm going to say it wrong, but.
Speaker: To the mall a to the mall. Yeah to the mall Tell them on a to the mall. Yeah That was crazy man and people were like freaking out because they thought like it was wanting to kill himself or something Because you know, I tell them on I'll take it. Oh, I tell messa me She also me J dos parte
Speaker: These are the last words I'll ever speak and then I'll set me free. I actually think I'm not 100 % sure. I'm just saying, I think, um, he wrote that song when his mom was dying. Uh, and it was kind of his, it was kind of his way of, it was basically her saying goodbye. Um,
Speaker: What is your shirt say, by the way, what kind of what is on your shirt? It's bugging me. I'm sorry. Very off topic, but. It's just a cavalier shirt, Cleveland Cavaliers, Cavaliers. That's what it is. Yeah, the back of it has a has the has the big has the big logo. It's basketball season, man. I hate basketball.
Speaker: I don't want to be, uh, I don't want to be seen, uh, ripping the blue jackets right now where, uh, they'll make them. I, I will, I will put money on the blue jackets, making it into playoffs within the next five years. Oh yeah. Within the next five years. Uh, and I joke, I, you know, I grew up a penguins fan. Well, yeah, because you were born in the 1800s back before the blue jackets were created.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, we didn't get the blue jacket. Yeah, the blue jackets are in. Dead ass. Last place in the metropolitan. I don't know how. Oh yeah, so so they are dead last in they in all of NHL. They have 16 wins on the season. Oh my God. They've played 51 games.
Speaker: of the
Speaker: the worst records in NHL go to the San Jose Sharks and the Chicago Blackhawks. I'm, I'm mad that we, that we fired tortellini. Uh, yeah, that was bullshit. Yeah. Because now we fucking suck without it. We suck ass. Yeah. And then you got, uh, and then we, and then we got rid of, uh, full long ago. Yeah. We got rid of Folina. We got rid of Bob. We got rid of, uh, we got rid of dooby. Mm -hmm.
Speaker: Actually, I think the the best blue jackets team that we've ever had. We got rid of all of them within a two year time span. Well, almost all of them in a two year time span and fired our head coach who got us to the playoffs. And had been giving us winning seasons. Yeah, well, and don't forget we had we had fucking Cooper.
Speaker: and Columbus strong Cooper, not that football coach. And he was winning and he was winning. Now he's in Tampa Bay. Where did where did a tortellini get get taken to? And Cooper was with us and we was winning. He's in Tampa and he's won back anyone back to back Stanley Cup championships in 2020 and 21 2020 and 2021 and and he has kept the lightning in the playoffs every year.
Speaker: one of the top teams in NHL. What was his first name? I don't know. I have to top my head. Tortorella. Not Tortorella. Yeah, John Tortorella.
Speaker: Uh, Torello is previously head coach of Blue Jackets, New York Rangers, Tampa Bay Lightning. That's right. He was in Tampa Bay and the, uh, Vancouver Canucks and he won a Stanley Cup with Tampa and no fourth. He is fucking Philly. Fuck you, Philadelphia.
Speaker: So yeah, it's, uh, it's a little rough being a blue jackets fan right these days, but, uh, we need a new head coach. Uh, we need a lot. I think that we have some talent, some talent. Oh, we got, we got talent for days, man. We got, you know, you got, um, uh, uh, Alexander text here, text the hour, text the, uh, Patrick Lane, Elaine.
Speaker: Boone Jenner. He's he's pretty good. I hate that he took the spot of that. He took Foligno spotted as the captain because I don't think he quite deserved it. Yeah. Zach Wierinski. Wierinski is there. Wierinski is phenomenal. Yeah, but we got and in our goalie Elvis Elvis is in the building. Yeah.
Speaker: great fucking, uh, great fucking goal. I mean, so there's, there's talent on the squad at the end of the day. It's just, I think it all comes down to just piss pork ocean, unfortunately. Yeah. Uh, it doesn't, it doesn't make sense to me why we got rid of tort, tort, tortarella. Holy shit. Yeah. You know, then I'm over here looking at, uh,
Speaker: You know, I don't watch the NBA like I used to, but I follow it to a certain degree. And, you know, Cleveland is one of the top teams. They're first place in the central. They're on a nine game winning streak. The last, um, they're, uh, yeah, they're nine and one in their last 10 games, but I think they're before that one loss, they had won like eight games or some shit.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: and uh yeah in the playoff race the standings Cleveland's number two for the east so you know I don't watch like I'll watch a game every once in a while I just kind of follow it just online and just keep track of it but I mean I just I skip all it's just NBA has just become there's a lot of dumb shit going on players don't have no fucking sense in their goddamn heads doing dumb shit
Speaker: I believe that these guys are also. Like all the top tier talent or they're like all trying to get on the same damn team. Yeah. Because I think they're going to win championships and LeBron, you're not winning championships. You build a fucking team in LA and and at the end of the day, Cleveland still better without you. Suck it. I I've just I've never found very much entertainment and basketball, particularly in the NBA.
Speaker: when you've got 110, 115 point scoring games, and it's back and forth the whole time. I get, so like, I'll watch March Madness every now and again, just because, you know, everybody does your tournaments, everyone does your brackets. And that can be a little bit fun, but pretty much just because I'm rooting for a specific team.
Speaker: And and I have I have ulterior motives, but when I just watch basketball, I get bored so quick. It's not it's not. It's not that physical. It's it is fast paced. I'll give it. I'll give it that. It's very fast paced and whatnot, but yeah, I mean it's. I just I get bored with it. It's it's like watching golf except for I could actually sit down and watch golf. Nobody can actually sit down and watch golf. Well, I've done it before.
Speaker: The people that do is they're they're weird. I'm absolutely I'm weird. And you're a slut, but I don't I don't shame you for it. Well, you gotta call everybody a slut, man. I don't know. Maybe it's just projecting. I don't know. I make you feel good. Call me a slut. A little bit. Yeah. You dirty whore. Dirty whore. All right, Chris. You feel good about yourself because you're going to slut shame somebody?
Speaker: Yes, I do. I feel great about myself. Special place in hell for people like you, pal. Good. Good. I'm excited. Right down there with Adolf Hitler getting pineapples shoved up your ass. It is not that bad. No. Not bad. No. Little Nicky. Honestly, if I do end up in hell and I see Hitler walking past me in a maid uniform, I will shake the devil's hand.
Speaker: I will suck Hitler's dick. What? Wait, what? That's weird, Connor. What did you say? Why would you do something like that, dude? That's weird. What did he say? What now, Chris? Hey, man, thought what you did on while you were on Earth. Pretty dope, man.
Speaker: Major props, man Not that not the old you thing I'm talking about the whole like, you know making it to France and that was impressive Then we got involved in ruin your parade, but you know, yeah Bitch slut your ass back to Germany Go back to Belgium Let's just remind the rest of the world he's truly in charge shall we
Speaker: back to back world war champs seem much like america i have something in common with america we're champs shut the fuck up i hate you so much america is the champ and i'm the champ i hate everything about what you choose to be i hate all your decisions you make in life and i hate the words that come out of your stupid fat fucking mouth
Speaker: I feel like I feel like Michael Scott from the office when he finds out that Toby's coming back. No, no, please God no. You know.
Speaker: I wouldn't be mad if somebody else won. It's it's tough to be the champ. I mean, Shut up. Twenty -seven. I hope your wife kicks you in the balls tonight. There's there's no competition out there for me. I mean, I like the competition is Tony Jeff and Mike and now you and like you like There's no competition. Fuck you, Tony. Fuck you, Tony. Fuck you, Mike. And uh we have we have fuck
Speaker: You don't have a fuck you for me. Just make one. Yeah. Fuck you, Jeff. Fuck you, Tony. Fuck all y 'all. That was me one night because everybody was coming at me. Fuck you, Glick. Fuck you, Smoke. Yeah, I'm not in here. Glick's dick. Another fuck you, Smoke. Words are hard. Words are hard.
Speaker: the the the the the
Speaker: Well, you know what I wasn't going to but now I You're one of us now Are you John Connor Connor with the hard ER at the end
Speaker: What is this first grade shut up? Or or nerd Chris it's it's midnight homeboy and That's that's my cue. That's your cue Jeff died I don't I don't know where he went. Nope. I was actually planning on into this on early tonight. Anyways
Speaker: Well, if you're doing that, then I will, I will stick around for the post credits post credit. Well, Mr. Mr. New brand new admin. You want to look over there in the brand and pick a closing song for tonight. Oh yeah, I can do that. Oh shit. Makes any sense to me. Who fucking sings this? And what the hell's the song called?
Speaker: Jesus, H Christ. Tell me what the title is and I'll run with it from there. Well. Yeah, I see that you took down all our Toby Keith. I was gonna. Toby Keith is over here if you were says nonsensical nonsense at the top and there's that little arrow down. I have a brand for clicks House of Music, so there's all the Toby Keith from last night.
Speaker: Ah, there it is. Well, I grounded everything because I'm ready. We're going to, we're going to finish out the night with a Toby's live performance. His last live performance. Don't let the old man in or actually. Should we get a cry on the old man in there? You're going to cry on or, or crying for me.
Speaker: That's a crime for me is a damn good song I think I think we're gonna end it with crying for me for but by Toby Keith He's gonna be really missed but I want to end out the week With and then forget about him next week. I mean don't forget about him but we will walk past it next week and And finish out the show with with some Toby Keith Go ahead hit the music man
Speaker: I'll do the outro. Sorry you missed me. I'll get back with you as soon as I can. Thank you and God bless. Got the news on Friday morning, but a tear I couldn't find. Showed me how I'm supposed to live and they showed me how to die. I was lost till Sunday morning.
Speaker: I woke up to face my fear While writing you this goodbye song I found a tear I'm gonna miss that smile I'm gonna miss you my friend Even though it hurts the way it ended up I do it all again
Speaker: To play it sweet in heaven Cause that's right where you wanna be I'm not crying cause I feel so sorry for you Crying for me I got up and dialed your number
Speaker: And your voice came on the line With that old familiar message I heard a thousand times and just said Sorry that I missed you Leave a message and God bless I know you think I'm crazy But I had to hear your voice again
Speaker: I'm gonna miss that smile I'm gonna miss you my friend Even though it hurts to win and end it up Do it all again So pledge sweet in heaven Cause that's right where you wanna be I'm not crying cause I feel so sorry for you I'm crying for you
Speaker: So play your upside -down left -handed backwards bass guitar I'll see you on the other side, superstar I'm gonna miss that smile
Speaker: I'm gonna miss you my friend Even though it hurts waiting it up I'll do it all again So play it sweet in heaven Cause that's right where you wanna be I'm not crying cause I feel so sorry for ya I'm crying for me
Speaker: I'm crying for me I'm still crying for you
Speaker: Getting a little funky with the saxophone in that song right there.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: I want to say it's like Chris Wyman or something like that. Well, anyway, Wyman, Wyman Tisdale, a basketball player and jazz musician who passed away on Friday, May 15th of 2009. His cause of death was the esophagus collapsed due to chemo. Oh, wow.
Speaker: Wyman was getting, was getting to treat his cancer. Keith recalled to the boot that when he received the news of his friend's death, I reeled around there for two days and a super. He was a great guy with a charisma smile and the closest thing to Jesus I've ever met. There's a line in the song that says, you showed me how to live. He was a perfect, perfect human. And I got up Sunday morning and realized I was just going to have to face it.
Speaker: That's a quote from Toby Key. The song features jazz basses Marcus Miller and saxophonist David Kause, both friends of Wyman, Keith Dulcie, the jazz stuff on this song is something for me I've never done. We laid some chords in and there that wouldn't cause a Marcus Miller played on them. They would have stuff to work with from their world. I never put jazz changes in anything I've done. So that's one of them.
Speaker: Well, on that somber note, on that somber note, somber, somber, somber bitch. Appreciate y 'all listening tonight. Appreciate y 'all hanging out. Sorry that you got a little perturbed with me, but I promise there was no malice in it. I was just having fun and having a good time. Hopefully you feel better and hopefully you get some sleep. Everybody out there. Thank you guys for listening. Thank you guys for hanging out. If you're not already, make sure you check us out on all the social medias.
Speaker: Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and TikTok. Don't forget, we do do the show live every Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday on YouTube, Twitch, and Facebook. And you can also listen to us anytime, anyplace. Sorry, I lost my train of thought.
Speaker: Where your podcast set all at non sensible nonsense podcast or head right over to bio dot link slash nonsensical nonsense All of those links are gonna be there for you as well. And if anybody who's watching You want to head over to Even though she got mine at me I do want to shout her out. I'm just teasing we had friendly friendly banter She's got a
Speaker: huge month of august coming up for her uh there in edinburgh for the french festival uh world's largest i think it's music and arts festival or something like that yeah she's gonna be doing her show literally from the first to the 25th i believe every night she doesn't have a paypal set up if you guys want to help her out and donate or whatever or just find it and share it you can help out that way you don't have to give money you can share it it's down there at the bottom of the screen it's uh
Speaker: PayPal me lady lady. Oh one you guys can help out and share it and and if you feel inclined to Drop some some pounds on her Drop rocks on or anything like that, but they that's their money over there. Yeah. Yeah. Don't don't don't be throwing stones or anything like that. I was in quids Pounds quid
Speaker: Our idiot, our idiot listeners are going to be like, we're going to throw pounds of squintedly. You know, help her. Sorry. That's their train of thought. Yeah. Our listeners are much like us. They're mildly retarded, but this is America. I'll show you what a pound is. Nonsensical nonsense will be back Wednesday night with a brand new episode.
Speaker: Monday night, uh, we will be here for a brand new episode of the now newly named newly dubbed. I don't know if the name's going to stick around, but it's not nonsensical nonsense anymore. Part of the time being, it's going to be weekly bro check. And then Friday night we got clicks house of music and supposedly I guess Tuesday, Jeff's new show pennies and dimes make 11 cents or something like that. I don't know what the hell he's calling it. I don't know business for dummies. I don't know. I guess he's starting that Tuesday. So.
Speaker: Lots of stuff coming up, lots of stuff going on. And, uh, we just appreciate y 'all being here. Thank you guys for 20 ,000 over 20 ,000 plays. I'm 10 shows behind. So that number is going to, when I get these episodes posted, I don't Jeff, thank you guys for hanging out before we leave. Carter, would you like to give anybody a little.
Speaker: a little little words of wisdom or a little a little one -liner to in the show. Now, it's your part of the show. Well, if you if you want words of wisdom, you'll have to come back on a Monday night but one liners, my favorite, it will always is and always will be go **** yourself, San Diego. Yeah **** you, San Diego. You bunch of sluts and as Jeff always says,
Speaker: And don't forget, ladies and gentlemen, when you find yourself at the crossroads of life and you don't know what you're going to do or where you're going or even where you're coming from, and you're kind of lost and confused, just ask yourself one simple question, five simple words, five simple letters, W -W -N -N -D. What would nonsensical nonsense do? And then do the complete pocket opposite. Unless you like jail. Yeah. Unless you're feeling frisky. Then absolutely do what we do.
Speaker: If that being said, ladies and gentlemen, be good or be good at it. I was about to say that you suck. That's my line. You can't say it. I'll say what I want. Bitch. I got to find the. Yeah, that's my line. This guy. Was it that whose line is it anyway? Whose line is it anyways? Well, we deleted it. No, we didn't delete. There we is.
Speaker: hit the button
