Transcript
Speaker: I must keep watching soybeans. I must keep watching.
Speaker: Hey, y 'all better look the fuck out today. My crayons are short. The box is full. My bottle of glue's topped off. from My helmet's on tight, baby. We about to rizm with a tism. Let's get with it. Suck my dick and eat my asshole, you sons of bitches. but What, baby?
Speaker: Acknowledge me! Suck it! Jeff. OK, I was just thinking that that clip of suck my dick and eat my asshole is so fucking aggressive, dude. Like, why are you so aggressive? Sometimes you got to be aggressive to get your point across. You know what I mean? You got to do what you got to do. I guess. You got to speak. I never thought about it until just now. I was just like, oh, that's so aggressive, like the first words that are said.
Speaker: I think I was saying it aggressively. I was talking about kicking giant's asses. I don't remember what we were talking about. I was just saying. You know, it's not so aggressive. Look, Jeff, sometimes you got to be aggressive and sometimes you just got to state your wants and needs. All right. no Better be dead and cool than alive and uncool, I guess. Which, by the way, I watched again. I cannot get enough of that movie. You really need a fucking life, you know that. What I need is that fucking bike. Well, go ahead and do your intro so we can get past the elephant in the room. We have an elephant in the room? Always. What's ah what's up, Britt? How you doing? walka walk What's going on, everybody? Happy Saturday. It is nonsensical nonsense. it's It's another old school Saturday night. ah I know, right?
Speaker: We are old school this week. Yeah, it's just Jeff and I. We've been rocking in old school since last Saturday night. um But that's cool. Sometimes, sometimes it's nice to put the old, you know, see if the old uniform still fits. if you Well, you know what they say, if you can't run with the big dogs, stay the fuck on the porch. So we told the boys it's down the porch. went Fair enough. I'm calling it. Happy Saturday. Happy 4th of July weekend. Hopefully everybody's had had and is having a great weekend and having a little lot of fun. And you still got all your, uh, appendages and whatnot. I do. Unlike I did hear a story and I'll get to that here in a little bit. And I might bring it up again on Wednesday night out of the great state of South Carolina. I got to tell you something, dude. This is crazy. Anyway.
Speaker: So we got Jeff in the building. and You guys know me. I'm Glick. What's going on, Vicki? Oh, nice. Oh, vacation sounds good. I need a vacation. I don't know if it's a vacation, a staycation, medication, but I need one. You definitely should be medicated. Oh yeah. We all should. And vaccinated. Yeah, that's not happening. Not that kind of, thing just in general. mr She's mostly rabies. Mostly rabies. If you've got a vaccination we can give you, just give it to him. I'm sure he needs it. Anywho, welcome to Nonsenseful Network. Nonsenseful Network. It is a Nonsenseful Network show. We are the yeah the foundation show, the flagship show, the cornerstone, if you will. Yeah, yeah, yeah, the creator. We're like the god show of the network. Yeah, you know what? I'm not mad at that. We've created everything we see here.
Speaker: and on the seventh day we rested.
Speaker: I'm like, other people that rest all the fucking time, I'm just saying. Nevertheless, if you haven't checked out the network, because we are a network of show. not a network of channels, but a network of actual shows. And they are live Monday through Sunday, right here on the network on Facebook, Instagram X and tick tock. The shows are on YouTube, Twitch X and Facebook. And you can listen anytime, any place, wherever you listen to podcasts that just go into your little search bar and a type of type, type, type. I'm not watching it. So no fucking spoilers alert. Thank you, Brian. You know, I'm in the middle of doing a fucking podcast. I'm not watching wrestling.
Speaker: but
Speaker: fucking jerk off.
Speaker: Don't worry. I'm not watching wrestling either, but for different reasons. Give us a follow up. Give us a listen. Give us a, give us a share. If you guys would be so kind, we greatly appreciate that. Or you can simply go to bio dot like slash nonsense going nonsense sense is right down there at the bottom of your screen. It's going to be ticker tockering are all down there at the bottom all night long. All those, uh,
Speaker: There we go. That's good. Got some new flavored water. That's really good. ah I will fucking block you on everything, just so you know. Yeah. I'm not watching it. I don't know. if My son's watching, so if he's watching it tonight, then I'll watch it tomorrow. If he's not, then I'm going to have to wait until he comes home next week to watch it. Nonetheless. Sounds like a lot of work. i'll Speaking of the network, just to give you guys a heads up, Monday night is Men Caring for Men. It's a men's mental health show, Tuesday nights, which has been catching a lot of criticism from one person in particular, in particular, because apparently all we do is horse around and it's just like, well, you know, having a good time and joking sometimes requires, but is a part of men's mental health and, you know. Deflecting. Deflecting comes into that too.
Speaker: Yeah. So just calm down and and listen to the whole show. Don't listen to the beginning or the first hour, whatever the case may be. Um, Tuesday nights is Jeff's garage. It's Jeff and Benji. They're doing their thing. If it's in the garage and it's got a motor, they're going to talk about it. Wednesday night is what the fuck news. If it's in the news and it makes you say, what the fuck? We're going to probably talk about it and hopefully make you say what the fuck kind of like Brian. He makes me say what the fuck right now daily. daily bri
Speaker: Thursday nights, speaking of Brian, Mark and Brian talking shit over there doing their interviews. Hey, and now hopefully you guys got a chance to check out Thursday's show. Uh, if you are a wrestling fan, it was money in the bank. We did our, our picks for money in the bank tonight. It's on. Go ahead and check that out. And as I said before, little man. The champ junior made his podcast debut and absolutely showed off guys. Don't call him that. He calls himself that. He'll grow up with a big fucking head like you. Call himself that, bro. He's definitely your kid. All we do is win. All we do is win, son. We're winners. Calm down. We're winners. And winning is what we do.
Speaker: Speaking of being a winner. This guy is on Friday nights. Glitch House Glitch House of News. Make sure you tune in this Friday. I'll be promoting this show coming up this week. This Friday coming up, we're going to have Jules. Brie, Marlee, and Mizzy, they're all going to be on the show hanging out with me. We're going to be talking about their show out in L .A. Women Rock L .A. It's going to be a fun show. I think we're going to have a really good time. Saturday nights is your show, nonsensical nonsense. You know what we do here. It's unhinged, unapologetic, comedy based, just having fun, talking shit, hanging out.
Speaker: Well, Mr. Heyness, you're still gonna watch us at the end of the day. It is what it is. Let's get used to it. And we do something a little different on Saturday nights. We call it the open door challenge. Jeff and I, we call it the open door challenge. It's something we, it's something I came up with and then we started running with together. It was purely coincidental one and and it's been a lot of fun. So Jeffrey, if you could one time, drop that link in the chat. We put the link they go bud and everybody who wants to come up, is more than welcome to come up here and hang out with us. Whether you like hanging out with us, you don't know who we are. And you just stumbled upon us and you want to come hang out. Or if you don't like us and you want to come and state your feelings, you're more than welcome to, unless you're telling me. Yeah, where's my boy Wes? Unless you're telling me Wes is on the show. Because Tony D's not welcomed here. Well, he just stared at his phone anyway, so. No, I'm excited to have Wes on the show. I love having Wes here because
Speaker: I'm only kidding the jokes. People come down. Uh, come on, come on, come on. Sundays, Sundays is, I don't know when it's going to start, but it's going to start eventually. Uh, Jarvis is going to do a sports show. I believe, uh, Hey, fireman rich and Tony D it's not, it's not rumors. It's a real thing. It's actually going to happen, but it's an actual sports show. It encompasses all things. So. just don't i'm I'm actually kind of excited. I really want to get ski i making don't don't hide and be around the bush when you talk about us. All right. Just say my name and say that you're upset because one of my guys is going to do a sports show and you're all butthurt, but you're really going to be butthurt comes football season. When I do a fantasy football slash football show, that's actually happening. in Both of you, you know, I might actually do that considering I have to fucking play. Yeah.
Speaker: The big birdie is telling you it's actually it really is going to happen. So deal with that. But that'll be on Sundays. And then well, actually, that's not the complete network search. So blazing and I are working on something that is the network for now. Calm down for now. For now. However, there are shows coming. No, I'm not going to give away any spoilers. We'll see if I allow it. We'll see if I allow it. You mean loud or not? Fuck you. I don't care. We'll see if I allow it. I think it'll be fun. I think it's what Blaze and I are talking about. I think it'll be really fun. It'll definitely bring controversy.
Speaker: Break some hearts. Yes. Blaze and I are doing a whole bunch of stuff. Don't be shy. I know you do. So we'll have a sports show. And Jarvis, I'm sure with football seasons going on, he'll be covering football and college football. um I want him to come to the Olympics so I don't have to actually watch. And as well as I will ah dabble in the world of college football on on my Sunday morning show. But my Sunday morning show is more going to be fantasy football NFL related.
Speaker: What's up, buddy? Benji and I literally just spoke for three hours. What's going on, man? We started talking about one thing. Next thing you know, we're... It's not going to be true now. Nine months once he's done with his pregnancy. Fuck you, Steven. I think the Olympics would be a great thing to cover. It's sports and I don't want to watch. I'd rather have a you tell me about it. It's just a recap. Yeah, like a recap show.
Speaker: Nine weeks. He's getting a show. Who's getting a show? ah You want to take along anyway. Anyways. Uh, but yeah, there's a, there's a lot of stuff going on. Um, you know, we got, you know, Jarvis so will hopefully have his new shoe show coming up soon. I don't know what's going on in Jarvis's world. We ain't seen him since Monday. Apparently he's still alive. That or that's a list on his account talking for him. I don't know. Hopefully he's still alive. Hopefully he's okay. I don't know. congress He had to go to his clan meeting. Yeah, that's what it was. Connor's a punk bitch, so he won't be here for a while. Well, I get it with Connor. He's got surgery coming up, and I think his folks are in town, right? His folks don't even like him. That's what I said. I said, just calm down. It's only six hours. They'll be all right. mom tells dirt They're old. They're in bed by six.
Speaker: You know, they're eating dinner at five, they're in bed by six. You're all right, don't worry about it. Yeah, his mom don't even like me. She tells me during cuddle time. Yeah. I can't even stand that kid. but but He's crippled. I mean, yeah what am I going to do? He's got no legs. It's not like I can go play catch with him. Like kickball or something? No, can't do that. Well, so much for that idea. i But now, uh, yeah, lots of, lots of things going on, man. Lots of things happening. It's, it's, it's a, you know, everything's kind of sluggish right now. It'd be in a holiday weekend and everybody was kind of in the holiday mood and the vacationy mood. And this week was, was, was weird, uh, with the shows. So I felt like, you know, I've lost all track of time. Um,
Speaker: I felt like I was going to say it's been it's 4th of July weekend. You you were probably hammered the entire time. No, I haven't had I haven't had a beer in. A week and a half. Oh my God, I'm so disappointed. I don't know why I'm just saying yesterday. That's kind of like general mood.
Speaker: Pretty much. Yeah. I just haven't been in the mood to drink. I gotta be a hundred percent honest with you. Not really feeling it lately. And yesterday was Nikki's birthday. So, so she, she heard her. She said, I'm getting shmammered for my birthday. And I was like, Oh, I'm so far. It was like every day. No, I did send her a happy birthday message and and I tagged you in it. Um, so you officially have a Google now. Yeah. I said, uh, I told her, I said, you just put me in the direction and tell me where you want to go. And that's what we're doing. I'll drink Pepsi all day. And that's what I did. I probably have type one, two, three, and a B and C diabetes after the amount of Pepsi I drink yesterday. But I, you'll be all right. I do it all the time. I'm a healthiest. Nat fly. It means I could die at any minute.
Speaker: yeah but i do There's a lot of words that people use when they describe you. And I guarantee you, healthy is not one of those words. Well, unlike some people on our shows, I can actually walk. Well, I mean. Up and downstairs. No, but I did want to bring up the elephant in the room. You know, you and I both mildly touched on it in our chat today. I want to bring that up. And I want to bring it up with this caveat, Jeff. Go ahead. It's a simple, did we like it? Did we enjoy it? No spoilers. I enjoyed it. I can't talk about anything more because the moment you start spoiling stuff, I'm just going to drop you down off the screen. Okay. You have a tendency to spoil. He froze. Or I froze. One of us froze.
Speaker: One of us froze. I don't know who it is. Maybe it's Jeff. Maybe it's me. Jeff has a tendency to spoil things.
Speaker: He might have just got wiped out by the hurricane, I don't know. Nope, it was Jeff. Whoa, hey. Okay, good, it was Jeff. Jeff has to tend to see the spoiled things when he watches new movies and television shows. So, spoil something that just dropping you down. No, no, I'm not spoiling. back up obviously you come right back up but you know i know i No, I'm not spoiling. I did enjoy Beverly Hills Cop. I i think they missed miss the mark on on the name. Like they should have put it before there.
Speaker: I think the day was cool. I loved it. Beverly Hills Cop, Axel Foley, if you guys haven't seen it yet, it's on Netflix. It just came out this week. I enjoyed it. I loved it. It stuck to everything that made Beverly Hills Cop, Beverly Hills Cop, and the formula from beginning to end. And I loved it. And I've said that we had the week before. The soundtrack was good. Soundtrack was good. I did have the one. Disappointment that you and I spoke about and I get it's a little thing like nobody will notice But I did was the last thing that we talked about Apparently Eddie's retired to Matt laughs but like there was a couple spots where it would have just it would have rang home and it would have been great but But I don't call max callbacks were there ah Easter eggs were there everything was there
Speaker: And it was, it was the same format as the original three granted. The third one's not the greatest, but it is what it is, but I enjoyed it. I was, I was kind of happy about it. I was, I was sitting, I was sitting back here. I was uploading episodes of the podcast and getting those all up to date, which you just got to get your, she says in he sheds or whatever. i do I have to get that up. I'm probably gonna do that tomorrow. Well, I haven't, I didn't do it because as you mentioned, I was in a hurricane. They shut the power off here at like 10 o 'clock on Thursday. And I just got it back a couple hours ago. Well, almost like six hours ago now. I haven't deleted it. So it's still up there. um No, I didn't, I didn't delete it. But I got all the other shows off. So while I was doing that, I was,
Speaker: I was sitting back here. I think he was doing a little recovery before she had to go to work today out on the couch. And I was sitting back here at my desk, watching Beverly Hills Cop. And and and I enjoyed the movie, man. It made me laugh a lot. and And you know, we talked about Roadhouse when it came out. And Roadhouse, everybody expected it to be the original. um Where this one, you can expect the old movies. you know the when When Roadhouse came out, everybody everybody was like, it's not the same. Granted, it wasn't supposed to be. This one is the same. It is a continuation
Speaker: ah i I thoroughly enjoyed it. I'm probably going to watch it again. Well, i think I think the expectation for Roadhouse was a lot of people were thinking that it was going to be ah shot like a shot you make yeah like a remake like they did for Footloose. you know what i the it and and And it's just like, no, this was a totally different standalone movie, just with the same concept, same idea, but it was its own standalone movie. And I think that's why a lot of people are disappointed now. Beverly Hills Cop, same formula. eighty yeah year yeah ah transport You're transported back to watching the originals in the 80s and and just just loving it and having a good time. It's -
Speaker: And I said it before, I'm gonna say it again. Joseph Gordon -Levitt held his own, man. I thought he did a great job. He's a hell of an actor. Oh, he's a good actor. I love the kid. I think he's great. But yeah, he held his own playing against Eddie and and you know and of course I think everybody loves a little rosewood I think rosewood fucking killed it man you know that dude just never changes he is he is the the was what what the high school girls of
Speaker: days to confuse, you know, everybody gets older, he stays the same. Totally sports, but it's all sports. like bening you know i mean But I enjoyed it. Like I said, I'll probably watch it again. um Like I said, there's some really good Easter eggs in there.
Speaker: Yeah. I might, I might watch it again. It kind of, it kind of puts me in the mood to, to watch the original three. I started to watch the first one last night or this morning. And then, and then roll into that for a second time at the end of the day. Um, which um I might do tomorrow. Apparently I'm going to be home all day tomorrow by myself. So, um, I don't know, man. Uh, I might watch. I might go old school. There's a few movies out there I want to watch. Um, a couple of movies on Netflix and stuff like that. Plus Nikki just got, um, Nikki was like, we were, look cause we love watching horror movies here. Right. like Man, I wish we had shutter channel. Uh, I love shutter. She's not a big fan of it, but she was like, well, let me, let me get the trial. Let me get it for a trial here on the Amazon or whatever it was.
Speaker: and see if there's a bunch of movies or whatever we want to watch. And if there is, we'll go ahead and keep it on the Amazon Prime. If not, we'll get rid of it after the yeah after the trials. Well, I do have all day tomorrow to sit at home. I can watch Shutter all day long. It's like, what do I do? Do I watch Shutter horror movies all day long or do I play video games? You know, yeah you you got it so fucking rough, buddy. Let me tell you. yeah but ah Well, I mean, it's not like I leave the house and do anything. Hey, hey, you're preaching to the choir. I, I, I have loved the house in like a week. Kind of awesome. I mean, it gets boring sometimes, but just watch something else. Oh, yeah. And that's what I like.
Speaker: Yeah, that and that's what I did today. there's and once niki like well I was back here working and doing stuff, but watching the movie and then Nicki went to work and I was like, hey I guess I can get something to eat and watch a couple episodes of the show I'm watching and then play Call of Duty until it was time to do the show. So i just just like. It's a normal day. Man, it's like I'm a wild and crazy guy. with Crazy. You need to calm down. You're at a 12. I need you at a six, dude. I will say this, though. This is the first time in my entire life. This is this was the first year in my entire life that I did not go see fireworks. And it better be the one and only time that I don't go watch fireworks. I'm actually kind of disappointed and upset that I didn't get to go to see fireworks because I love watching fireworks.
Speaker: Okay. So I'm not one of the fireworks. I was in the military and fireworks gave a shut up pussy. Get over yourself. You know what? For me, you know, being down here so long. Yeah, so is mine. And I tell her she's a punk ass bitch all the time. but For me, fireworks don't really do anything. And yeah, I can take it a like go watch them. You know, I did watch red, white and boom on TV. We were supposed to go down to red, white and boom, but Nikki wound up having to work. I forgot about red, white and boom. So I watched red, white and boom on TV. And it's just not the same. I mean, it's still cool to see. And I did. was being in there Yeah, they did a really cool thing because the Columbus crew, our major league soccer team is going for their second championship in a row this year.
Speaker: I think they've won like three in the last five years or something shit like that. Um, so they did like a tribute thing. They all Mexican. I'm sorry. i i don't know Like how many Americans are actually on that team? Let's be honest. Wait, Jeeves. but What do you do? You like to wait. We've been there. We've been there, buddy. this is firework that You like to blow. shes yeah bla Sorry. I don't want to hear you go. Is he a friend of Katy Perry? something I love, I love, I love going to watch fireworks, but they did this really cool thing. So, uh, you know, the Elvis song can't help falling in love with you. Yeah. So they they did like a remake of it and it's called can't help falling in love with the crew.
Speaker: I'm not. So it's like, I don't know if they did AI or some guy who sings just like Elvis recorded it or what it was. Sounds just like Elvis, but they did a whole bunch of, they did this like tribute, very red, white, blue, and they did a whole bunch of, uh, I know this is going to sound really weird. And I was like, wait a minute. Am I seeing what I'm thinking I'm seeing? Cause their colors are black and gold. Okay. We're black and gold.
Speaker: So, like, they went up and exploded. Yeah, I get what you're saying. I'm just trying to picture in my head. I need to look this side of the gold. Like, explosion. um i mean isn't The gold, the gold. the gold but like the Starburst was lighting up the black firework behind it. It was really fucking cool. That's impressive. I was like, yeah well, have you looked into the science of fireworks, how they make all the shapes and stuff? I saw this the other day. It's like they actually have the shape that it wants to. But then you want it to become inside. It's just different bursts and they all go off at a different time. Yeah, I watched the other day. That's kind of impressive. It sounds like a lot of work, but it looks impressive.
Speaker: What up, Geez? What's up, Lovett? How you doing? But no, like, um, well, the fourth, I was basically just, I sat here in the house and then, you know, watched a little TV and then they killed the power for the hurricane, which as I told everybody, it was just a, it was basically a fucking thunderstorm without the thunder. What did I do on the 4th of July?
Speaker: Like I had, I have that a window that's 15 feet tall and about eight inches wide. It's an aesthetic. Would you lie down there or is it just the expats? Obviously, Mexico don't celebrate the Fourth of July. Obviously, but the expats, the expats, the expats, there's a there's a pretty decent size expat group here. I don't hang out with any of them because I'm like, yeah, I understand that. I mean, do they do? They'll do they'll do like small fireworks that you, you know, buy.
Speaker: Um, nothing, what else you small without heaven i because down in South Carolina, we used to be able to find buy the ones that they put off at fireworks shows. So that's what we use. Well, no, here, here technically it's illegal to buy fireworks. Although every, every Christmas and single the mile, you can buy them right outside Walmart, some assholes. technically are illegal in Ohio too, but as we all know like um a big state line Like the firework the biggest fireworks store in the fucking world phantom firework has is has a giant Goddamn store 20 minutes from me. Yeah, and you go there and you buy all your fireworks and when you pay for it You sign this little waiver that says I will not I will not fill you up in Ohio but apparently so some areas in Ohio are
Speaker: It is legal in some areas, it's not. There was a news article that I was reading the other day, and there was like 30 cities, I don't know, or 30 counties or whatever, where fireworks were illegal. And it was like, ah hey, don't forget this this this weekend. Fireworks are illegal in these counties. Other counties, you're allowed. So I don't know what it is. Ohio's like separated, so. Yeah, but have you heard the expression, what are you in jail for, fireworks? Yeah, you're not going to jail for setting up fireworks unless you're a complete asshole. You're going to get a citation. You're going to get a ticket or something like that. Yeah, exactly. The cops roll up at your house and you're sitting on fireworks and they're like, oh, man, I'm sorry. My bad. Whatever. And you're cool about it. You're fine. They'll be like, all right, well, here's your ticket. If they pull up and you're like, fuck you, it's Merck's birthday. Freedom drink, I'll do it. Merck, you little fucker. And then you put rooming candles at them. Yeah, you might wind up in jail or dead. I don't know. Hashtag worth it. No, but it's like The expats here on major major holidays like Thanksgiving and shit like that. They'll do look the great thing is Here you get like three Thanksgiving's Because you have the US one the Mexico one and the Canadian one Because I think they just adopted it but it's never the same day and
Speaker: Well, I don't know what is it always like the in third in the States in the States, but like Canada's like a month fucking early. I still don't know the date of that one either. I just see it on the Facebook group chat that the expats are out of it and fuck I'm going to dinner motherfucker and I'll pick up some chicken somewhere. that
Speaker: hasag gos And they do the same thing at Christmas. They do, you know, a big dinner where it's like, it's it's just a stupid party. I've gone to a couple of them. July 1st is your guys. Yes. You know, Jesus here. He's Canadian. We have a resident Canadian here. Well, I could ask Steven.
Speaker: No, but it's like at Christmas, they usually do something. you're go And then in the Fourth of July, there's usually something. But there's also like, I think these guys just look for reasons to party and hang out together. But most of them are all like fucking snooty, older folks. And there's like, I don't fit in. Like I'm the guy that shows up tattoos and I'm, you know, you know, back when I drank, I walk in with a case of beer and they're like, what are you doing? I'm like, we're. Very good, right? And like, no, we got like four coronas total. Seriously? Steven, Steven's still Canadian, but he's not here to answer the Canadian questions.
Speaker: but
Speaker: oh they is But it's one of those things. It's like, I stopped going to those group meets because and everybody's too snooty. Like it's not like you and me hanging out where we just shoot the shit for the entire fucking party without getting off our asses Unless it's go get more beer or have a cigarette It's literally it's it's a stand Like there's like four chairs in the entire fucking house and it's usually this fucking rich asshole's house That's got way too much fucking room. There's 80 people in room that I met the year before So why not? Why not just put your own group together and do your own thing?
Speaker: because the other half of that same coin, no, I don't fit into either group. I don't fit in, I can. I can fit in with the snooty people, but the other people are like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The other people is like - I don't agree with myself, because I'm cool. No, no, no, no, it has nothing to do about cool. The other group is like, let's get stoned 24 hours a day and only talk about weed. I don't care. Yeah, but you love Wes. Yeah, but that I like listed the West, but I'm not going to go over his house and watch him smoke weed for four hours. I would totally hang out with Wes. I would. ah Like we would have to be. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. Yeah. yeah I don't need a contact book. I think Wes would be awesome to fucking hang out with. There's very few middle ground people that are expats here. yeah I'm a rich asshole that sells timeshare and I make more money than God.
Speaker: And, or, or I'm broke and I can't afford to go to a party. And all I want to do is. look we down stung You're like the wish version of this thing. We would call you stone, not the singer, Jeff, the wrestler.
Speaker: chips like oh i do yeah i't know was to police i'm more I'm more like bug instead of flea.
Speaker: I'm watching from the rafters. He had a whole gimmick in WCW back in the day. I'm gonna go make this short and sweet. Sting was like the face of WCW and he always wore that. Did he wear white face paint with black? He wore the flashy neon colors and he had the bleach blonde flat top and face paint and then he disappeared and then you started seeing glimpses of him in the rafters and he had and he had adopted this crow look. all black white face paint with the black. yeah the white i've I've seen him in the white. like And he would just be up in our rafters just brewing and stewing and watching and then he would be gone. And then and then then when he finally started making get appearances, he was like zip lining down from the rafters, long black trench coat, all black clothes, long black hair with a ball. but
Speaker: Yeah, I'm not mad at that. Probably would fall out of the raptors that would be an expat. So so love it. Ask what the next pat is. The next pat is a person you can have expats from anywhere in the world, by the way. So it's it's when you move to a new country, it's basically an immigrant. It's just the nice patriots from fucking America. Yeah. Bitch. Yeah, I was going to say it's very grunge that that whole stung thing. No, but it's it's literally just a bunch of people because like we have we have friends here that are from they were born and raised in Sweden. Now they live here. There's a couple of Germans that live here. There's one chick. She's she's German. She's fucking hilarious. And she makes fun that I listen to Robstein. She's like, yeah, they're not that cool. I'm like, actually, they are.
Speaker: like no we not only outside of germany are they cool i know but good
Speaker: But yeah, you get there's a lot of Americans a lot of Canadians um Not a ton of Europeans, but there are some But I think there's just all fucking snooty They're like, oh, have b um w i'm like yeah, so you don't know these terms. Oh great. Bye. I just ah
Speaker: This is assholes. It's just like I just bought another fucking Ferrari like that's great. Let me try it No, I don't drive it. I bought it because I'm like, no you super I Just don't hang on one Besides I also have to leave my house. I'm out right there We have the party at my house. Okay, but then I want you all to leave in like 15 minutes he because I don't like people. I am I am like if I could teleconference to one of these like put me on TV and I'll zoom in. Other than that, I don't want to fucking do it. Don't want to talk to me, come up to the TV, you know. okay
Speaker: Yeah, ah I wish I could just do that. Just zoom everywhere.
Speaker: Like if you wanted me at your wedding, like y 'all zoomed in, I'll zoom in. Like a zoom conference? Yeah. Like a zoom conference for your wedding. How do you think I would want you on my wedding? I'm using it as an example. Like I need to watch you fail another medic wedding. I'm good. I can imagine it. But it's like, I don't, I've said it a million times. If I have to leave my house, that's a bad day, dude.
Speaker: I'm not bad at that, the hologram idea. I have one fucking fly in his house and it just constantly pissing me off.
Speaker: Fucking drive me insane. Yeah, I have no interest in actually going anywhere. I haven't been to one of those expat parties in, let's see, last time I went to one was Thanksgiving. right after I met my buddy, Dave. And then he and I were like, fuck it, let's stop going to these far good parties, snooty fucking people.
Speaker: I just it just blows my mind that there's only like we got you got all the expats down there and it's only like snooty people are stony people stoner people like that don't make any sense to me. I can't imagine that the only people down there are those. Well, no, because because the other people, the people like me, they're the kind of assholes like I don't want to go to that fucking party to my studio. And then we're too lazy to actually build our own group. Exactly. I you know, I i'm I'm a weird, I'm a weird like combination of introvert, extrovert, like that same. Oh, no, you're not. You do not know. No, no, no. Here's the thing. If you drag me to a party and there are people there, I actually like I'll fucking bounce around the room all night. But if I go there and I'm like, ah everybody's here, a fucking douche. I'm ready to go home. baby You know, there's times where like I don't really want to fucking go out. But then once I'm there and it doesn't even have to be anybody I know there because you know me, I'm going to make friends everywhere I go.
Speaker: Uh, people who don't like me are just because and they listen to stupid people or be their stupid in general. If you don't like me because I'm a likable fucking guy. Yeah. I'm a lovely person. Go give me a fucking beer.
Speaker: No, yeah. Uh, there's, I mean, hell. How many times have I gone out with like Nikki and PA and I've sent you snaps, which is random friends that I've made at the bar. That's a huge difference here. Like I could go to the club tonight if I wanted to, but it's one of those things like I hate. Yeah, you go to the club tonight if you wanted to, but you'd be like the grumpy old guy at the end of the bar, like... Oh, 100%. 100%. No, but it's like, also, I have this weird thing about being sober and speaking Spanish. Like, my Spanish is flawless when I'm drunk. Oh, my God. I'll tell you stories for days. But when I'm sober, I'm super self -conscious about it. Yeah. Then you get one or two tequila shots in you and a couple of Zemas.
Speaker: And you start being all creepy with the girls there. and and Dudes too. Dudes too. Don't lie. I don't know. I don't know. But, but my thing is like girls when I go out to a ball. Yeah. I don't talk to anybody. I'll just be honest. No, i'm I'm like my wife and I used to go to the club and, and she'd be like, I want to dance. I'm like, okay, I'm going to sit at the end of the bar and drink beer. I'm good at that. I can't dance. I dance very white. I I'm, I'm so white. I'm clear. you know, I could do the robot. Does that count? I'm usually the one dragging Nikki out on the dance floor. I'm not the dance guy. Like, ah I'll be out there dancing with like six or seven people. know And when I say dancer with I don't mean like,
Speaker: crying and crying and yeah dudes and girls out there. I'm just dancing. We're all dancing and having fun and I'm going to grab a nigga. I'm like, get out of here. She's like, I don't want to dance. You just have to dance. I'm going to get beer. Oh, like so much fucking bar and I don't drink very often, but we're here and I'm going to drink because she has another drink or two. I can drag her out on the dance floor to the next morning. She's like, I hate you because my knee is hurt and my ankles hurt and I'm like, fun less listen you know i look at so you I have that same issue. Like, you i you and I, you and I don't get those pains, like, because we treated our body like a fucking amusement park. Like Connor, if Connor goes and walks for four feet, he hurts. I don't have that issue.
Speaker: but they like you know well I could dance. I choose not to. I get self -conscious when I dance too. When we would go out and the poor DJs would be at these bars and it'd be like they're playing music and there's like one. I'm a drunk 70 year old lady on the dance floor. I'm like going to all the tables like, come on, **** Let's go. Come on. Go tell a man what you want to hear. Let's get and then everybody's like, alright, yeah, it's like, hey, you're **** Welcome. Now, however, however, I do have a couple of friends every every couple of months are like, let's go to **** karaoke bar. Oh, you get a couple of beers on me. Give me that **** Mike. I'm ready to **** saying boy. Oh,
Speaker: oh oh it's horrible Not true, Jeeves, because this big old Sasquatch can break it down and bust a move on the dance floor. No, I cannot dance. I've been told I can, but I just think it's because the person's saying that thinks I'm cute or not. I love to dance. I don't care if I can or can't dance. I just love dancing. And I think... I get super self -conscious. Like, everybody's watching me. Oh, my God. You know, I'm not the important guy in the room that everybody's watching. Let's be honest. Yeah. I used to be like that. And it was always like, oh, I got to get four or five, six beers in me. And then I'm good. Now it's like, I'm going to be on my first beer and DJ plays something I like. And it's like, who's going to come out and dance with me? I'll bob my head while I sit in the fucking good song, man. But my only dance I do really well, I do one dance really good. It's called the 12 outs curl. That's an exercise.
Speaker: Same difference. I don't exercise so that my dancing is my exercise. So I drink beer or I'll have ah of white Russians or, you know, rum and cokes and shit like that. i This is my 40 ounce ae Skittles flavored water curl. I just, I actually love it. It's actually really good. I didn't think it was going to be good. Skittles watermelon and Skittles, like the powder that you put in your bottle. Skittles watermelon and Skittles cherry. That's my crack. I love that. I'm not mad at that. I'm not How much sugar is in it? Probably about 50 ,000 grams. Copy that. I'm ready. Take it.
Speaker: I can't, I can't drink. We're playing water. I get yelled at all the time. I should drink my water. Fuck that. I do my dishes with water. I brush my teeth with water. I'm good. Have you seen, and I don't know because you live in a third world country and you know, we have first world problems here in America. Have you seen those circle bottles? It's a water bottle, but it's got like an infuser and then you drop this little capsule down in there and it flavors your water and you can adjust your flavor level on the lip. I'm not mad at that, but no, I haven't seen. So, so like you could literally, you could take it out mid water, like mid bottle and put a new one in there. It's just a little cartridge. Well, I just seen today and I got to mention it to Nikki. They have circle because her and Austin both have one. Her and Austin both have, or not. They have the the bottles. They just look like plastic bottles, but I seen today that they now have cups like this mugs, the big tumblers like I like. Okay.
Speaker: I kind of want to get one. Yeah. You just drop it. i fuck I have a tumbler I'd never use. What do you think of it? Do you, do you like it? Do you like a juice, the circle bottle? I think they're great. Like circle is the brand name. Yeah. It's, it's, well, it's spelled like C I R K L or something like that. Okay. So I wrote the label.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: I'll take credit for the label, folks. Yeah, that's all right. um It's about circles. All the words are all the letters of silence. Shut up. Nikki always lets me try hers and then Austin had one and it was a sweet tea flavor and it was actually pretty good. How much are the refill cartridges? Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, that's that's a first world thing. It's like I can literally just go buy flavored water. but my problem is is I don't like a lot of flavored water. So the only flavored water that I found that I liked was Propel, which is by Gatorade. However, like a 12 pack is like $25. Oh yes. I don't know. They make, they make a, there's a brand here called a bonfil. They, they, they have a flavored strawberry. It's a berry. It's strawberries and blue. Oh, there you go. Sorry. i spell it I spelled it wrong. Sorry. Thank you, Jeeps.
Speaker: and dollar
Speaker: Thank you. james There you go. No, but like I have no idea. I have no idea. They're not very expensive because i like they make they make this this it's like a liter and a half. So it's it's not small. like You know, this fuckers huge, right? And it's a it's it's red berries, strawberry and watermelon flavor. It's really good. But when you look at it, it looks like it's got dish soap in it. It's that syrupy, you know, it literally looks like somebody left dish soap in the water. but it's it's the flavor. So, and it is kind of sweet and it's not very expensive, but it's just like, yeah, I'm not going to drink all that water regardless of the taste. I need sugar. I just, I don't, I should drink more water. I don't, but that's just me.
Speaker: i just like ah Dude I have been drinking so much fucking water your body like I got one of the big bottles. Oh, you probably see me drinking it on the show yeah that that that purple and yellow No, it's black and number so close i think well No, I think mike my my sister -in -law's got one that looks just like it this purple and yellow Yeah, but it's this fucking a big bottle and it starts at like 6 a .m. and it breaks down. Oh, no shit. 9 a .m. I actually, what is that? Like, yeah. like It really challenges you. Yeah, what well, am i looking at up to the side then off to the side, like 6 a .m. Let's get the day started. 9 a .m. You're doing great. And then it goes all the way down to like 9 p .m. Like, this is how much water you're supposed to drink in a day. And and lately, I've been drinking
Speaker: Like if I drink that during the show, I'll drink two of them during the show. That's the one thing like, like like you guys sit here to think that I bought, I bought Coke before the hurricane. Right. And I bought like four or five, two and a half liter bottles. I'm on the second one as of today, but during the show, because we talk so much, we get, you know, your mouth gets dry. So you end up drinking more.
Speaker: And so yeah, I get that. I totally understand it. Cause like, like I said, I opened this today and it's almost full. Brandon, I did have a couple extra drinks here. I had Dr. Pepper here too. I'll give you a, give me one second. I'll give you a visual. I'll show you that circle bottle. Okay. Yeah. I'd like to see that. You drink 12 liters a lot. God, how much do you piss buddy? Jesus 12 liters of water a day. I don't drink 12 liters of anything a day. Lately, like ah yesterday, I don't know why yesterday, but I was, I, you know, power was off. So I was cleaning up down here, cleaning the living room, you know, all that shit. And I was like, I'm like really thirsty. And I realized I didn't drink anything all fucking day. Just cause I was too lazy to go back upstairs, go get my Coke. So here's what it is.
Speaker: Here's the big bottle that I drink. Yeah. It's 64 ounces or 2 ,000 milliliters. But then, like, right here, you can see, like... That's two liters. Yeah. So, on the side, it's, like, 8 a .m., ready, go. 10 a .m., drink more. 12 p .m., keep it going. 2 p .m., yes, you can. 4 p .m., no excuses. 6 p .m., almost there. 8 p .m., treat yourself. So, it's, like, I'll drink... 8 p .m., switch to beer. Now I'll take two of these and a three out of four. Oh yeah, without even trying. But this is the circle bottle. So it's just, let me turn that around there so you can see the bottle. right And then there's a little, so here's your little cartridge. Oh, I see. So it's like a bait for your water. So you fill your water bottle up. Yeah, you fill your bottle up and you put it in there and it's like a filter. So when you, when you drink out of the top,
Speaker: It goes through that filter and it tastes like whatever. Like your flavor. This has got sweet tea in it, but you can also adjust your flavor to from like one. I wonder if you could just put like tea leaves in there to make your own tea as you go. No, you don't have to just go get a different bottle. So you can put zero on here where you're literally just drinking water or you can go all the way up to. Tell me it says 11. It goes to nine. It goes to nine. Just opportunity. Absolute full flavor. However, if you're at nine, you're obviously going to wear this little cartridge. there's here's a right Looks like a tampon.
Speaker: Yeah, I was going to say it does. But it's pretty cool. And now that I didn't want one of these bottles, because I'm going to be 100 % honest with you. These are too small for me. These bottles, it's like 20 ounces, something like that. You need a big one. A big fucking 40 or 42 ounce tumblers, which I like to use because I fill this up with water or pop. You know, like if I put pop in here in the morning and take it to work with me, that's the only pop I drink all day. Now, granted, it's like, Yeah. Like, it's a little over three 12 -ounce cans. Yeah. It's not small. But, you know, I put my flavored water in here, but again, yeah, I'm drinking more water, but I'm doing those Skittle fucking... Or... Oh, God. What is that? Remember the orange pop? What is that? Not Faygo. Crush. Yeah. Orange Crush. Nicky has a pack of Crush. It's got, like, grape. Right. Well, Crush had three different flavors.
Speaker: But there's so much sugar in them that I'm not really doing myself any favor by drinking it. And know well and that's that's the drawback to having, like, God damn, Jeez. That's what I said. How much does this dude pass? Like, do you just live in your bathroom? I was just getting ready to say that Gallop ball with the amount of water I've been drinking in the last couple of weeks over anything else, Dude, y 'all thought I pissed a lot when I was, when I was drinking. It's a whole different game when you're just drinking water. Yeah. The flavors are delicious. Love it. Don't get me wrong. The flavors are delicious. but but The Skittles have cherry, strawberry, watermelon, grape, blue, razz. I'm not a big grape guy. I've never been a big grape guy. i'm go to be It's kind of,
Speaker: I hit a hit. I mean, I gotta find that right. Great flavor for me to really like right. I agree. I agree. And then the crush has grape, which is actually really good. The Skittles grape. I think they have a grape in Skittles. I can't remember. But the orange crush is really good. The lemonade crush is really good, and the cherry is really good. Skittles also has a mixed berry that I love. Yeah, I'm not a fun of great.
Speaker: Well, that's because you're in the wrong complexion to like the grape drink. I wouldn't have said it. I've been a racist motherfucker. I'm too white to drink grape. Well, Jeff, you're supposed to let me say it and then not say it, just because I say it. Does it make it okay for you to say it? You racist motherfucker. Yeah, I'm just... I'm not a big grape fan either. I'm with you guys, but sometimes you find that right grape flavor that just Just hits. I agree. and Yeah. Yeah. ah It's like less is more when it comes to great flavor. It's just like I like with your toothpaste, you get that toothpaste. Ninety percent of toothpaste is fucking mint. I hate mint. I buy kids toothpaste. Oh, yeah, the bubblegum. I don't I'm with you. I don't like that spearmint, that minty flavor. I don't like it. Not a fan. and they're Not a fan. like ah Here's it. Here's one. And I know you've done it.
Speaker: Orange shoes after. I know. I was going to say, brush your teeth. Brush your teeth and then take a swig of pop. Yeah, that too. Yeah, because let's be honest, mostly mostly all I crave is Coke. You just ruined my Pepsi. Now I don't even want to fucking drink it. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you. yeah Dental hygiene. Thanks a lot. Fucking did this. No, I fucking did fall out. However, when it comes to mint, the only thing I like mint is mint You know, you go to the restaurant, they got the mint flavored toothpick. Those are fucking awesome. Well, I like those little Andy's things, you know, the housekeepers. but Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: or if you go to the old garden, they bring them to you. I change your meal. Yeah. But you know, you can get those different. call love but What are you doing over here? You're killing me. You call me. You don't even like apple juice. I like that. I am. That's the thing. Everybody in this house would be accepted to myself. They have, they have, um, um, The chocolate, the chocolate, no, they're mint. The little chocolate. No, they're chocolate it's chocolate with mint. Those are Andes. The peppermint things, those are they they're like round candy canes is what she's talking about. You're probably not American. Nevermind. I have no idea where you're from. She's not. She's not. I'm not some weird old guy who's like, every time somebody new comes, it's like, Hey, where are you from? What's your address? Where are you living? Tell me where are you're living. Tell me your world history. No, but it's like, um,
Speaker: Okay. Well, if you're not American, you get a slide. All right. Love it. Yeah. yeah not american or he's She said the last time she said the last time. about this Yeah. I forget where her, her lady were arguing back and forth about her. She was in here last week. New Yorker city. Wait a minute. Not originally though. I could have saw her. You were said you we were from like Denmark or something.
Speaker: RC is better. Hey, you know what Jarvis, if you're talking about RC Cola, I'm not even going to disagree with you. That is a delicious tasty treat. And, and you know what? Now, you know, spending time in the South living down in South Carolina, it's a delicacy RC Cola and a moon pie. And there was an RC Cola moon pie store down in Charleston. And man, just get weirdest pay to this day, my kids still, they love eating moon pies, which they are delicious. And im on my own And I've always liked our seats. You know, we had our seats. Oh, yeah. Well, there was a there was a I used to work when I worked for my uncle. No, there was a there was a little little story. Yes. Sometimes I could have swore you said you were some. Sometimes they do kind of come across like aliens from New York. Let's be honest.
Speaker: like the Florida of the North. Oh, yes, yes, yes and no. I'm just not drinking much anymore. I really haven't been. He's on his period. Riff, relax. I'm on my period. No, I'm honestly, I'm, yeah, I just, I haven't really been in the mood. And, you know, I, I'm not. oh Oh, I get it. No, you know what it is? You've finally matured, sir. No, I just, and I'm also trying to lose puberty. yeah jeff i ah You can't grow, you can't grow a luscious beard like this until you hit it. You'd be surprised. No, but it's like... Yeah, yeah, yeah. i'm I'm good, bro. I just... He's on his period. I'm on my period. No, i'm ah I'm trying to lose some weight and
Speaker: Apparently, well, I actually sent you, I think I sent you. Apparently, when you're trying to lose weight, alcohol is like the worst thing for you. Oh, it really is. It is. Basically, your body goes, oh, I need to store, I'm going to stop producing anything to help you lose weight and I'm going to put all this energy towards my liver to combat this alcohol coming in. I was like, I appreciate you asking, Ribdoll, thank you. No, i just I'm just ah I'm just cut back. um And not drinking as much as I was. So like I said, just trying to lose some weight. His birthday is coming up. He's worried about coming old. I'm ah i'm only going to be 23 years old. I'm not worried about being old. It got me in a car. in my car yeah a cook in a car
Speaker: Oh, I was waiting for a backlash. So I said, you know, Nikki had her birthday and I saw it on Facebook. And I think you were or one of her friends posted, but it was a picture of you and her. And she's like, it was like, happy birthday, Nikki. So I sent a message and I was like, look, watch out, there's a cougar. She's officially a cougar now. And then I that i then i tagged her saying saying, just kidding, Nikki, I love you. chart And then I sent her a and message directly saying, happy birthday, love you.
Speaker: and And I was waiting for a backlash. All she did was send out a laughing emoji at it. I was like, all right, she's finally learning. I'm just kidding. Jeff, Jeff, Jeff. She was she was she was in no position yesterday to be responding or OK, so I should give it a couple of days. So she goes to reread them because but fuckcker there was she was in no condition for rebuttals or anything yesterday. She was she was loving life. I'm glad she had a good day. And She, she enjoyed herself. So I, she, she definitely enjoyed herself. So I was, I was braced for the, obviously you got, you got plenty of sense of humor. If you're hanging out with us, assholes, cause we bust balls or chops, everybody gets it. No, there's no, but yeah, no, you know, me, I, yeah, no, I just, I'm nothing. I'm just cutting back. ah You know, I got, I got a lot of shit on my mind right now. Um,
Speaker: going through some things and also trying to lose some weight. So nothing crazy, nothing. I'll get through it. I'll be all right. And then, you know, six, seven months down the road, I'll i'll kick it back into back in end. You know, I'll I'll get it going again, man. Back on the wagon, so to speak. yeah I definitely ain't falling off no wagon. I definitely ain't on no fucking wagon. That's for goddamn sure. I ain't doing their damn 12 steps. Mama didn't raise no quitter.
Speaker: But yeah, no, I just had to cut back a little bit.
Speaker: Yeah. I'm not giving up pie. All right. And you know what? I'm, I'm, I know you're from New York and I'm going to, I'm going to try to let this slide. It's not soda. It's pop, but you're from New York. You don't know no better. Uh, but yeah, no, yeah, I'm not giving up. I'm not giving up either. I'm still drinking. I mean, I had, uh, actually I was actually, I was drinking four to six pops a day. uh lightweight yes jeff i might be a lightweight but um what i have today i think i only had two i had a pepsi uh and i had amount of some people get up and drink coffee in the morning i don't drink coffee i don't like uh i'm not i'm not i'm not i can't i can but i don't because then i have to make it i like uh i like used to be pepsi and a cigarette in the morning now it's just pepsi
Speaker: Gave up smoking a long time ago. Now it's just Pepsi. I have a Pepsi in the morning and then I have a Mountain Dew. So I'm only drinking two pops a day outside of that. I'm trying to, and I know that if they don't want to see this flavored, this flavored shit ain't any fucking better than the pop. I'll be honest. Yeah. Yeah. ah But that's why I want to get one of those circles. That's why I'm going to get one of those circle tumblers because I'll drink the fucking piss out of them. Yeah. Cause some of them, Nikki. Okay. So, hold on a second. I'm going to continue this conversation, but I want to take a real. You're going to have Mickey piss in it. You're going to drink it. Okay. And I know, and I know, I know I'm about to break something up and I know Jeff's about to make fun of me. So I'm going to go ahead and take the abuse. But when we come back, we'll, we'll continue this conversation. But Jeff, I felt like since we're going like, Oh gee, the last few shows.
Speaker: Yeah. I think we should go OG with our music selection today. I agree. I 100 % agree. And I'm going to save a certain song for the closure. How about we do it for the money? I'm not going to save it for the closure. I want to do it right now because it's early in the show and people are still hanging out. And I think that in the early days, a lot of people miss this song. This is one of our favorite songs by one of my favorite bands, Blacktop Mojo. We're going to take a real quick break. We're going to come right back and I'm going to allow you guys to make fun of me because I'm going to say something that I probably shouldn't admit to. However, I got to go make my bladder bladder. Go ahead. However, I know I'm going to catch a bunch of abuse.
Speaker: Um, But we'll be right back here in just a few minutes. One of our favorite bands, bands that we originally started doing the show with, Blacktop Mojo, with their song, Wicked Woman. And Jeff, you better be back for making your bladder glider in time for certain parts. Enjoy, we'll be back here in just a few minutes.
Speaker: She dances naked through the trees until they're all so lit She wins but swears into the wind and she commutes with the dead
Speaker: As I began to breathe, she said Oh, I'm all gold in the sky Take this back and find I wanna live for it
Speaker: She stops to feast There was a smile on her face as she walked by to sleep It's a left to back again
Speaker: hey Sir, can I help you? Do you have any weapons of any kind? Anything to defend yourself? Sir, this is a Speedy Mart. This is a Speedy Mart. I just put them on the roller yesterday, they're pretty good. No man, like something sharp, something like I can stab to defend myself with. I've got some sharp titter combos over there. It's kind of like a roots cracker pregnant with a cheese baby. I'm like a roots cracker pregnant with a cheese baby. Let me just take one of these lighters and I'm going to borrow your bug spray and can I borrow your bathroom key as well? Yeah, bathroom key. All right. Got your bathroom key right there. Make sure you bring it back. And that'll be $1 ,360. Guys, look in the background if you're watching this video. There's guts in there. All of those rations. All of those ones.
Speaker: Whatever, man. Okay. Whatever, man. Set. No, I'm sorry. The bathroom key cashed me up still. but there
Speaker: Oh, shit, Chuck! Oh, shit, Chuck!
Speaker: Wow! More load in the sky! Take this sacrifice! I wanna live forever And I'm a spirit in the earth Give me a little love Make me a god love
Speaker: Let's fucking go. Blacktop Mojo, Wicked Woman. What? If you guys haven't heard of Blacktop Mojo, go ahead and check them out on all social media, wherever you listen to music, all at Blacktop Mojo. Show the guys some love. They got lots of new stuff out. Actually, Matt's got another new solo song out. It just came out not so long ago. um Gotcha. Fucking been driving me crazy all night. Uh, go ahead and show those guys some love. We started with them. We were, we've been playing their music since day one. Those guys were awesome. We've had Matt on the show. They're they're a big part of nonsense. Well, nonsense. So since we're kicking it old school style and doing this OGs, Jeff and I, I figured, you know what? Tonight's a good night to go old school on the music for the breaks. And and yeah has but with some songs that we haven't heard in a while. Anywho, welcome back to nonsenseical nonsense. When I was since everybody, hopefully you guys.
Speaker: or enjoy the weekend. You've had a great fourth of July weekend. It is America's birthday. Hopefully you got to eat some good. miracle Hopefully you guys got to eat some good food, drink some good beverages and blow a lot of shit up. And now you're hanging out with us on a Saturday night. So we greatly appreciate y 'all being here. hanging out with us as always. If you're not already, go ahead and check out the socials, Facebook, Instagram, X and TikTok. Don't forget, we do have shows live Monday through Sunday on YouTube, Twitch, X and Facebook, Facebook, little Facebook.
Speaker: um what are heart yes You can watch us live. You can see our stuff and you can jump in the chatters box and hang out with us and interact. We do enjoy interacting with you guys. It's one of our favorite things here at the network. Well, some shows we enjoy you guys being there and partaking in the conversation. And if you can't join us live or if you miss us, you can listen to us any place, anytime, wherever you listen to podcasts, that whether it be Spotify, Google, Apple podcasts, good pods, pod beans, Spreaker tune in.
Speaker: think we're on iHeart. I don't know. All you got to do is just Google nonsensical network or nonsensical nonsense or men can't permit or or talking shit or but or clicks house of music. You Google any of them motherfuckers. You're going to find us just as as our favorite non host anymore said. Google it. Just cool on that shit. And you know what to do after you Google it. You follow us. You like us. You love us. And you share us. And you give us that old heart too.
Speaker: yeah school spit all that bit on that thing Give us a share like our good friend Leslie did. She hit us with the share. I seen it on Facebook and dropped a little like and I thank you on that. I appreciate the shares. You guys are awesome for sharing. Um,
Speaker: There's some else. so let's make by way there down there A little tick, the little ticker, ticker taper thing. It's scrolling all night long, right below our stupid faces. Follow us everywhere. Bio dot .link slash nonsensical network. Check it out. Like I said, check us out, man. Show us some love. We appreciate it. Oh, look at that birthday girl in the house. Oh, what did I log into? Trust me, this is not the worst thing you've got me doing. I was going to say, you've seen the viewers. What's going on, baby girl? You must be done at work, I'm assuming. Or you're doing busy work. You're down at the bottom of the bottle.
Speaker: yeah
Speaker: so So I'm going to make fun of you. I'm ready. OK. Hold on one second. Go ahead, Tiny D. ah I'm trying to catch up with the simple check here. I was blowing up the chat. I'm trying to catch up. Yeah, I saw. America is one so much America. Much like America, I'm a champion. ah Somebody's hungover. I share something in common and we are the champs. Once again, like history started July 4th, 1776. Everything before that doesn't matter.
Speaker: Yeah. Love a groove. Fuck yeah. Best fourth in a while. Hell yeah, man. glad Just looked up the lyrics. What do you think? Driving home? go That's a killer song. And the, and the guy who went into the gas station, that's Matt. He's the bass player of the band. Um, he went in and he was asking for weapons and stuff like that. The wicked woman in that video. I don't know if they're still together. I'm assuming they might be, but that was his girlfriend. Yeah. That's a, that's, that's his woman. And that video was murdering everybody. Um, that dude is ugly, but luckily
Speaker: but Uh, but also it is Saturday night. Just drop the link in the chat. It is an open door challenge. All you got to do if you're feeling extra froggy and you're feeling courageous is, um, hit that link and you're going to be right here on stage with us hanging out, chatting and doing whatever we do or whatever you do. Uh, uh, you're right. I don't know who that is. from the 70s. Blacktop Mojo is awesome. Check out Blacktop Mojo. Also check out check out Matt James. Matt James is the lead singer of that band and he does some solo stuff. Almost to the point where Jeff and I almost had to do a ah wellness check on him a couple of his songs.
Speaker: better right Like, what's going on with our guy? And Matt's been on the show before. Hopefully I'll have Matt on Glitch House music down the road. david Yeah, Benji and I were talking about that. And he's like, how come Glitch hasn't had Matt on Glitch House music? I said, let's be honest. Matt, getting Matt tied down to not moving? That's a lot because this dude, I don't think this dude's been home in like three years. for more than 20 minutes because they're always on tour. They are, they are on tour. If they're not on tour, they are in the studio. Matt's working on solo stuff. Uh, maybe we maybe we we'll play some, matt well maybe we'll play some solo Matt stuff coming up here. Yeah, we we do a little solo Matt stuff. I love, I, I'm a huge fan of the band. I, I stumbled across these guys and here you go.
Speaker: If you don't know anything about Blacktop Mojo, go to your youtube your your YouTube and type in Blacktop Mojo. and And these are the first two songs I want you to listen to if you don't know who they are. Listen to their cover of Phil Collins in the air tonight and then listen to their Aerosmith stream on. Yes. That's actually how I found them. I found them in the air tonight song and I was like, You know what, I'm not mad at this. yeah that was so So before we actually played the song on the show, I played it to Jeff and I'm like, and it was brand new. They just debuted it. I was like, Jeff, what do you think of this song? And we were listening to it watching but hear each other and And both Jeff and I were like, the fuck? He needs a weapon. Just hands him a giant fucking.
Speaker: I love that. i mean kind be on almost the year because That was our closing song for almost a year. Well, over a year, actually. That was our first song for over a year. It took almost a year before we realized behind him at the gas station. isn't It's just rows and rows of fucking ammo. Guns and
Speaker: I'll have to look them up. I'll have to look them up. They're Texas boys. I love them. I'm a huge country band. I'm a huge rock fan. And they're like the perfect combination of country and rock. Yeah. You know, I love the band. They're one of my favorite bands out there. But anywho, so. And of course, every time we watched it, I had like for the first like six months, I had to comment on how hot that chick is. Holy shit. Like I could pull out that outfit off. And I, on purpose, did not tell them that that was Kat's girlfriend. Hey, I'll buy Kat. I'm worth it. I think Kat could take you. But before winter break, we were, you know, we're talking about drinks and we're talking about, you know, the the circle bottles and stuff like that. Well, they have a, they have a, I think they're, I don't know, maybe I don't know if you're still in here or not. She said she's driving, so. and She might still be watching. I think they're called like,
Speaker: refreshers or something like that, frosted or something. okay But there was a there's, um I can't remember, I can't think of the flavor, but it's like a pink flavor, quote unquote, pink flavor. I'm not a big Starbucks guy. However, one of my favorite drinks from Starbucks, I think is the pink drink. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like a strawberry acai berry type thing. It's right. Then it's got the whipped cream on there. They're actually just called cartridges. Yeah. They're just conscious. Oh, refreshments. Yeah. There's just, that's what I was showing you. They're just cartridges. Yeah. Cause I just looked up on Amazon to just circle. Literally have 10 cartridges sitting beside you on the couch. It could be different. Every drink of water you take could be different. Huh?
Speaker: Starbucks pink drink is my favorite at Starbucks. I'm such a bitch Hey, dude, I I every time I go to Starbucks I get the same fucking thing I get the Somebody else that makes the pink drink that Starbucks makes that I like simple Jack and I'll stop going to Starbucks Hey, that'll if he sons of bitches know what they're doing to make this Sasquatch happy Nikki game changer yesterday you can't fucking put strawberry cream on it instead of the regular like. but ah Yeah, I see what you did there. Yeah. Well, I was drinking it with my pinky up feeling. Feel it. Feel it. That's the extra sense. Yes, queen. No, I get I I love getting it like I I get ah I usually get a caramel
Speaker: I don't like coffee. Simple Jack. I don't like coffee. It's gross. I don't like the way it smells. I don't like the way it tastes and I don't like what it does to my butthole. Yeah. Let's be honest. Coffee will strawber clear you out quicker. ah yeah pop like So I just, I just know I like it. I don't speak. I don't know how to order. I just point at the menu. I'm like, I want that one. I don't know how to yeah know who I am. Give me my regular. I don't know how to speak Starbucks. I just know what I like. Do the thing that you did last time, lady, with girl. Exactly. I'm the champ. Don't you know who I am? You should have listened, right? Fucking Starbucks girl. Do the thing that you did last time that I liked. Yeah. Spit on that thing, too, like you're at it.
Speaker: You're a man. yeah I don't like coffee. I don't like coffee. But I'll drink a pink drink with with strawberry cold foam all day long. I'll be happy with it. Oh, yes. and I know I'm not a small man, but I know me. Well, it's like, I'm a gay man, but I know me. So I can only imagine what it looks like would when but big old saspotsiring a big drink but my big ass is drinking out of a an extra large or a large pink drink with strawberry foam and I'm happy as can be well it's like uh dragon refresher okay okay okay so um strawberry dragon fruit I what i was gonna say it sounds like it's dragon fruit yeah
Speaker: No, it's it's like Jason Momoa is, he's, he, dude loves the color pink, but he's such a big giant fuck. Nobody's going to give him shit for wearing pink. What was that movie that Paul Rudd dressed down the chicken Starbucks? It's it's ah role models. He's like, actually, he's like, so congratulation yourre stupid. three language I don't know what it is. i just It's, it's for role models. I like, I love that. Give me an extra venti. The biggest one you got. Mickey, Mickey's such a starbies girl. She knows all the lingo. I don't know any lingo. I'm like, I, I don't know. The big one. Give me the pink one that I like and a big cup. What you need to do is get the tattoo of the, what you need like this. This is what I want. Give me this. Mickey, um, my, uh,
Speaker: I saw she was getting a tattoo. My uh my oldest daughter, she's no longer a virgin tattoo bird tattoo virgin Jeff. I was gonna say wait a minute. Wait a minute. Are we putting people's business out here? Goddamn. Tattoo version. Is he alive? Is the man still breathing? Easy simple Jeff. One Squatch, one cup. Yeah, there it is. The bigger is the trend. I don't know. Wait. She is no longer a tattoo version, a virgin. Her and Nikki got matching little sunflower tattoos yesterday.
Speaker: But Nikki, Nikki had a really cool tattoo on her arm. She got three of them yesterday, but it like to commemorate her 25 years as a bartender. It's like a mixed drink with a lime on it. Okay. But she had the one it's just black and white, but she had the lime colored green. And there's like a little white, like a little white across the top. It looked probably my favorite of the three she got yesterday. It looks really cool for just being such a simple tattoo. Hey, I like it. Simple, simple tattoos done. Right. Hey, I'm mad at it. Uh, I'll be right back.
Speaker: sending, she's sending you a Snapchat, Jeffrey.
Speaker: Excellent. I'd like to see it. I did not get any, I did not get any new work yesterday. However, uh, I tell you what, the guy did a really cool, uh, hammer that he's not impressed with a Viking hammer and a Viking ax. And I'm like, if he does a flash sale, I might want to get those and like an X. I think that would be really cool. I don't know where though.
Speaker: Um, I don't know where I would get them, but I like, I like, I like what he did. who Cool little shop, man, too. It was like, uh, just, just a little, uh, little tiny shop. Uh, one share, one room, uh, super cool. And, and the guy was really cool too. So, but, uh, Nikki also got a, uh, she got the matching sunflower with, with, with my oldest daughter. And then she got a, uh, little sea turtle on her foot. So, um, but the, the, the drink is probably my favorite. One of the ones she got yesterday, just something simple, man. But they just added just a little bit of color to it and it looks really cool. But, uh,
Speaker: nonetheless, what are you going to do at the end of the day? You know, that's what she wanted to do for her birthday. She wanted tattoos and lots of alcoholic beverages. And I think she succeeded in voting.
Speaker: I don't know where he's going. I say that all the time. I say that all the time. I talk about that all the time. Less is more. Quality over quantity. Keep it simple, stupid.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't know if she's registered to go yet. I'm not this guy. I'm just saying that you had a good day. I'm not discussing the aftermath or anything like that. I'm just saying you had a good day and you accomplished your goals. She, she set goals and she met her.
Speaker: I think I don't know. so I don't know. my I don't know if Austin's registered to do it or not. She should be. I think she is. I don't know.
Speaker: Our captain, our captain. What's going on, blazing? Making goals and achieving your goals. That's what's important. And she did both for yesterday. but And I think she had a good day. I think, I don't know.
Speaker: but but but but but
Speaker: What up, motherfucker?
Speaker: What kind of question is it? Obviously. What up? Oh, shit. You lost your new ring there?
Speaker: Did they find it or oh that was cool or the long gone? So I just got Nicki Snap. i I'm looking at it looks cool. not man He's off touching himself or something. Oh, yes. Yeah, I'm here. No, I. We all know Trump's going to come on, simple Jack. the Chris, this report now. but
Speaker: yeah
Speaker: Oh, yeah. Yeah. All of a sudden, I was just like, oh, I'll be right back.
Speaker: I don't know why. I'm just out of nowhere. No, that I saw Nicki's tattoo that looked that looks kind of cool. I mean, it's obviously not healed yet, but it looks good. No, no I mean, they're they're literally a day old. um' Yeah, I'm waiting. I'm waiting to catch my daughter not not paying attention. Yes. Oh, Yeah, boy. No, but you've had your shoulders. You've had your upper arms done. That bumping into the fucking doorway and shit, you're like, Jesus Christ. Oh, dude, it's covered up. But when I had my Superman tattoo done, so the apartment I lived in at the time, you know, the building was like 100 years old. Right. You know, 100 years ago, people were like your size. You know, people were a lot smaller 100 years ago.
Speaker: You know, like the average height a hundred years ago was like five, five. I'm like, ah you know what I mean? And people were a lot smaller. Those buildings were not made for Sasquatchians like myself. So I had this tattoo on my arm done and, and, and all the doors in my apartment were, and I'm not saying like a ti it's muscular strong guy. And I'm not saying I'm a big fat guy. No, but you're not small. Let's be honest. Big dude in general. So I had to walk through every door at an angle or sideways or whatever, man. I can't tell you how many times um I've got, you know, I've got my groceries. I've got my beer. I've got, yeah.
Speaker: I've done it, you know, um and I, and I, and I walked through the front door and it's just like, a and I just rip it right. it Or I go into the bathroom and mind you, most of the doors in my apartment, again, I'm only six two. I'm not that tall. I had to duck. I had to duck to walk into, you know, every my front door, my bathroom. And it didn't help matters. And I actually had to hunch over to go to the bathroom because there was like a little step and they didn't accommodate step when they built the door. So I had to actually kind of bend over. Man, I caught that tattoo on every goddamn doorframe for the first two weeks. I was ripping scams off. I did the same thing when I got my forearms, you know, because I sit, I sit like this and I didn't get the forearms. I didn't get the top of my forearms yet, but you'll see that. minute love Appreciate you coming by. Appreciate you. Thank you. Enjoy seeing you every show. We'll be here. We'll have the support.
Speaker: But yeah, Maya. I see that yesterday. Every time she should go. Oh, shit. Yeah. Well, like my my my tattoo artist, him and I have been friends for years. So every time he gets done with my tattoo, he's like, are you ready? And I'm like, ready? What are you talking about? It's done. And it'll just, with the glove, just whack! You motherfucker! Gonna punch you in the face! Dude, I cannot wait. I cannot wait. to and i And I had the perfect opportunity, but my mind was somewhere else. and and like a yeah she wasn't supposed to work today and she came down and she was like, can you take me to work? I was like, I thought you weren't working today. Well, they told me I have to come in. I was like, all right. I was doing podcast stuff. I was watching Beverly Hills Cop, whatever. And I took her to work. And right before she got out of the car, she was like, look at it. Don't you like it? And she had her all a knot. And it was just perfect. And it wasn't until I was pulling out, I was like,
Speaker: Missed opportunity could have gotten her just real quick like and she wouldn't even know what's happened and she's like no what the fuck? Because because until it happens you have no idea that it's gonna hurt o Yeah, like the first time you bump a new tattoo, you know, your first tattoo, you don't think ohlllthough I'll be fine after I'm done. Because as soon as they're done tattooing, the pain is done. But God forbid you bump into something, everybody for six blocks is going to know it well it. Well, and like the tattoo artists, when we were there, I told our son, I got a smack at to make it official. He's like, yeah, that's how you make it official. It's called setting the ink. Yeah, got to make it official.
Speaker: Well, it's like when I got my back done, you know, I have ah my whole back covered. I was dating a girl and, you know, when being intimate, she'd like to rub her hands on my back. and Don't you fucking touch me. Oh, God. I can't wait until I have the money to get my chest and back done, because the it's just when my back piece is going to be my entire back. Oh, yeah. Well, like my back's not done. My chest piece is basically my entire fucking chest. and But don't do them both at once, buddy, because you have to be able to sleep. Like, when you get your back done, you're not sleeping on your back for like a week. Oh, yeah, no. and um You think? You're not even sitting back in the chair. Not unless Spotify reaches out tomorrow and they're like, hey, I'm going to give you $100 million dollar contract.
Speaker: Yeah, you really think I can afford to get both? well Have you heard about this new thing? Also, neither my chest nor my back is going to be one session. I already know that. Well, however, have you heard of this new thing that you can do? They do it like new rappers do this. They get that, you know, $20 million dollars contract. You pay like 100 grand, six top of the line artists, and they knock you the fuck out. like you're going into surgery, you wake up four hours later and you're covered. Oh, well, there's there's actually a lot of, i when I was getting my arms done, but I was talking to Dustin, there are some parlors, depending upon the size of your tattoo and what you're getting done, they give you the option to put you to sleep.
Speaker: Yeah, that it's obviously like the real big parlors and like the but right it's not it's not your local, you know bob that just started three weeks ago It's you know, they've been they're established. They get tons of people coming in. They do a lot of big pieces um, like I want to get my neck up um, and i'm I am i'm i'm I'm gonna get, I'm gonna call Blazin and Wes beforehand. What can I take to knock me the fuck out? Like I want to just be zonked out of my mind because apparently when you get your neck done, it is hell on earth. Well, I will get my neck done. I say that now. However, I also said that I was going to get the back of my hands done. But then when I started,
Speaker: Talking about it. yeah Yeah, it was it was the visible the visible visualization. Right. And, you know, like, what what my arms are gonna look like, because my next when I finished my arms out, you know, it's coming all the way down my forearm and wrapping around on both arms. Right. wrist And it was just like, you know, and that's why I'm going to do a Moneer and low key symbol on the back of my hands, just because I think that would be really fucking cool. Yeah. Well, it's like, uh, each one of my tattoos represents something, but like I have one for my dad. I'm doing on my left arm and one for my column on my right. And and that's that's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm talking about. It's like, I can call blazing. Like I need something to going to knock me the fuck out for like four hours. So I just don't feel anything. Come on, blaze set up and pull up. Where you been? We ain't seen him a while. And, and like,
Speaker: because they're each one of my tattoos are different, even though I'm going to get the rest of my forearms done, I want to have something to tie them in. So there's no gap between, but I also have this really cool idea. I have a little Hot Wheels put all over the the one that you want to meet in on my knuckles. Yeah, had to refresh my memory yeah that's the thing. They were trying to convince me to get a loser. It was a band aid that said loser. They wanted me to get it across my knuckles or on my knee. yesterday. I don't understand why. Because my fiance and my daughter, not only do they think I'm a big fat fatty McFatson, but they also think I'm a loser. Sitting here watching a movie the other night, you know, everything has goddamn ads on it. And there was an ad where this guy whose t shirt shrunk, and it was like, and he put it on, it was up over his belly. They were making fun of me. Well, it looks like your dad. It looks like but but you the the biggest problem about
Speaker: when you're dating or married to somebody and you want to get a tattoo, and like do you randomly search for tattoo ideas? Please. Snout. Yeah. There you go. Calm dollars. You should know this, man. Yeah. butline saying Well, like do you randomly look up tattoos like for tattoo ideas? uh i mean yeah i mean yeah i'm always looking at tattoos and tattoo ideas i mean i know i already generally know what i want you know yeah but you want to kind of get the close design where you can hand it to your artist to say make this better yeah i already know what i want on my chest i already know what i want on my back and i already know what i want on one of my legs like it's i have been no clue for my legs i want to get them done but yeah like i think i already know they're already planned out in my end
Speaker: I already know. But you don't have the exact design down. I just, yeah, basically I do. I mean. Yeah, but like you can't, you couldn't show me right now. This is exactly what I want, just like this. Oh no, but I can go to, i could and and like my guy Dustin, he knows exactly what i what i want what I want on my forearms. Right. You know, because we've talked about it and I said, I can't show you a picture, but I can describe it. He was like, you describe it, I'll make the picture. Right. And I described my calf, I described my chest, I described, and well, actually my back, I can actually show you kind of what i want what I'm going to do on my back because I have the picture on the wall. Right. Well, like I've already have, I have my next like four or five tattoos already designed, ready to go. I just got to have the cash in time. Yeah. I'm just saying. like Like when I got when i got the
Speaker: I, you know, I did, I did this one on the show. I can't fucking, I did this one on the show and squirm the entire time. When I do my neck, I will not be on the show for that one. Cause I'm going to cry like a little bit. I do got to say major prompts to my daughter, huge props to my daughter for her first tattoo. And she got it like right here on her forum. Yeah. That's a tickle spot. She was a fucking rock star, bro. Well, believe it or not, when I got the word when i guess the bear, when I got the bear done, it was nothing. When I got the fucking cardinal, it was hell on earth. Yeah. It was like one or two times she went. Ooh. Yeah. and But other than that, she was like. what about When you get right here, right here on the rest, Jesus Christ, just kill me, get it over with. She was like, it felt like a cat scratch.
Speaker: It always I always describe it as like somebody trying to cut you with a butter knife Yeah prop props to props to her major rock star moment. She she uh now granted. I mean it was only It was only like it like to it. She her and her Nikki got matched. Okay. Okay, that's right um You know, I was split like when I got the winning the poo longest 45 minutes of my fucking life It was common. I both have poo on your body Yeah, I got poo on me. No, but like, once again, I got the Winnie the Pooh for my sister. And but because it's on my ribs, if I would have got it on my forearm or something, it'd have been nothing. But because I got it on my ribs, I spent the entire time like I was grunting trying to take a shit. It was just, oh my God, dude. Nikki's first tattoo, she got when she was 17. Her pops had to sign for her. She got Winnie the Pooh. Okay.
Speaker: Yeah, I got Winnie the Pooh losing a balloon. The balloon string is my sister's name. Wait. Hashtag Jeff and Nikki, twins. Twinsies. Twinsies. She's going to come home and she's like, I just she's like, I mean and need a laser appointment. ah ah just I'll save you a snap, Nick. and just gotta to pull my shirt Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Don't send shirtless pictures to my fiance, you son of a bitch. Yeah, trust me. She's not going to gush over it. She's going to go, wow. Wow. It looks just like you, oldie short.
Speaker: Now I got to figure out how to take a picture. You push the button, you point the camera at it, and you push the picture button, dumbass. No, like I'm holding the phone just so it gets the win of the poo. She gets a good picture of my nipple here. Put your pants on, Jeff. Yeah, don't mind that penis. It's no big deal. I just sent it to you, Nikki. Check it out. Don't worry. She's used to small penises. Your camera doesn't zoom far enough, so don't worry about it. No, but it's like... because it was on the ribs, dude, I can't wait to get your chest done. Cause I guarantee you that, that one guy, when I was getting the the Cardinal done and the guy was playing music in the background, and I give that motherfucker the props. That motherfucker sat there the entire time, got his entire chest done in a single sitting. i'm telling Bro, I'm telling you, and not to sound like a tough guy or anything like that, but I'm telling you.
Speaker: I get comfortable, get me a pillow to prop my head up, whatever. I'll bring a pillow with me. I might fall asleep. I'll take i'll take the pussy line because... and i don't hurt me call me a pussy i mean I don't care if I get called a pussy. I'm not like as i said a ru tried to be um not trying to be a tough guy or anything like that. but Well, Jarvis, i the only chest tattoo I have is I have my daughter's name in Japanese. money Jesus, you have tattoos? I know that sounds weird, doesn't it? He seems like such a straight -laced guy. Like, I would never get a tattoo. Would you? No, I did not put it on their purpose. ah But you are welcome.
Speaker: I'm sending my fiancé nipple pics. What's wrong with you, Jeff? I think that's the nipple I had pierced. Is it? He's fired. Sending my fiancé nipple pics. The hell is wrong with that guy? You can't have people like that on this show. No, that is not the nipple I had here. No, that blows my mind. Dude, I did it myself because I used to do body piercing and I did it myself and it hurt so bad. I was like, fuck that. I'm not doing the other one. Not Jarvis. We're talking to Jeez.
Speaker: but jarviss does probably have alic' bit sta It's right across his belly button, like Tupac's thud life tattoo. It says Alyssa's bitch. I did not, geez, I got to say, man, that's actually kind of really surprising. I didn't know, I didn't think that you would have any chance.
Speaker: No, and as I said, like I'm not trying to be a tough guy. I'm sure it's going to hurt like hell. I get my chest and back done and um I yeah but like like my like my tattoo artist just told me he said you're a **** psychopath because he's doing hating he's doing shading and he's and he was like this is the worst part. I was likeating with sha them like filling in like ah all my guess he was filling in and shading and putting in all the
Speaker: all the detail. There's a lot of detail on my and both, on both of my arms. And he's doing all the shading and detail work and filling in and everything. And, uh, and I was like, this is actually really common and relaxing. He was like, you're a fucking psychopath. Like I've seen guys three times your size fucking weep like little girls. But then I've seen people smaller than me just like, what is this supposed to hurt? I agree. I agree. Mickey, the outline is always the word. I think the outline and it wasn't the entire outline because like my Odin, obviously it comes down into like that little, my crack, my arm crack. Yeah. Like it comes down onto that side. And then it also comes like right. There's a couple of spots that are like right on the elbow bone. This one didn't hurt at all. my
Speaker: and ah fucking place
Speaker: Sorry, that got me that got me good. my My Valkyrie did not hurt at all. There was nothing about my Valkyrie that hurt. and always went went like You can see, and I'm trying to get a good view here, when he did right here, oh man, getting right across like the the parts of the wrist. Wow.
Speaker: Wait a minute, blazing. Did you see that back? Pussy at the truck stop or were you guys just at the local Popeye's? Yeah. behind walmart Maybe he made me pull behind Popeye's to show me that. but like I mean, don't be rude. i On my Cardinal there like he did. He did like it's almost like a flaming like fire thing, but it's supposed to be. Mystical or whatever that just has little lines all over my wrist all of my arm and fuck He bounced around so that it wasn't I thought I was special jereve. She Pop ices his spot. I'll be right back Don't don't if it wasn't his Cardinal has special meaning but Don't let him try to fucking talk it up like it's something super cool Stop that
Speaker: so back We don't get down at the KFC. We gangster. We go to Popeye's son.
Speaker: yeah I'm sticking my fingers in there. Can you sing that guy? Looks like that guy doesn't know how to wipe his ass.
Speaker: who Ooh, Jarvis, I see you had corn. But, um, yeah, no, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not guy. I'm not tough guy who's like, Oh, judge you don't hurt. I realize there's going to be a certain level of discomfort and pain.
Speaker: ah I told you, I have no problem getting that. I don't know if you're still watching.
Speaker: but
Speaker: I just, I just don't know how that's going to go at work. Chick -fil -A. Go to hell, Jeff. Oh my God, this guy.
Speaker: Okay, we've had the conversation about chicken restaurants. I like KFC. Raisin Cane's is my number one. Bojangles, I've never I don't think I've ever had their chicken. I've had their gross ass dry as fuck biscuits and their gross breakfast sandwiches but Man, I can't get down with Chick -fil -A, man. Chick -fil -A, Chick -fil -A sandwiches are just sad, dude. It comes on a soggy bun, and it's like a piece of chicken, and then and then and then a pickle, and that's like, that's it, man. And it's just sad, bro. It really is. Not even G -Bits can save that Chick -fil -A. Lee's Famous Chicken is really good, but that's more of a Chinese restaurant than it is an actual chicken restaurant, though. i mean
Speaker: At least when I'm at Arley's is all like you go in there and get some general sos you can get some sesame chicken I don't think I've ever had gojangles chicken
Speaker: Dude, raisin canes. Man, i said it I've said it a million times and I'll say it a million more times. Raisin canes is delicious. They got crinkle -cut fries. Their sweet tea is to die for. And that goddamn cane sauce, I'll put a baby's foot in it and I'll eat a fucking baby's foot with raisin cane sauce. And that's the bottom line, because the clique said so.
Speaker: Well, if you ever get out this way, we got a raisin canes right down the road. Jerry Vichy.
Speaker: Right. Let's go get some orange chicken, some sesame chicken. and Yeah, man. Chinese food does sound really good right now. Could go for some panda compress. It's like Chinese food, but fast food, but it's still good nonetheless. I mean, it's just fucking sauces and chicken. and rice. It's not that it's not, it's just good.
Speaker: but
Speaker: but Raising canes is my shit, man. i need to hell out us The only downfall about raising canes is it's it's it's real expensive. It's actually one of the more. You should order you some hot and sour soup and pick it up on your way home. yeah
Speaker: I don't know if that's Jeff or a fake Jeff who just joined. Hold on. Jeff or fake Jeff. No, it's real Jeff. but
Speaker: You guys are still fucking flooding out there in Minnesota. with the
Speaker: I don't know about Chinese food. I'm just like, man, can't plan to compress sounds really good right now. It's you. Well, what are you doing, man? Do you want me to bring you up or not? Oh, are they really? Oh yeah. Shit, it is 9 30. I think I got ready in there. Go to break here in a few minutes. Um,
Speaker: Jeff is currently, uh, shooting, shooting his brains out. and
Speaker: I tried to pull you up, jackass.
Speaker: what
Speaker: Get you something to eat, damn it, you need to eat more than I do. I appreciate you. Go to break it. Oh my God, Jeff. I'm going to get a break in like four minutes. Calm down.
Speaker: You need to get you something more than you need to get me something. I appreciate it. Thank you. Your parts of the Valley are for real, man. What's going on out there? What's going on up there? Are you guys really set to be frost or are you guys getting a lot of rain or something? What's going on out there in Kent, Canadian, pull up and give us the weather report. Jeremy. She. and give us a Jaravicii report as well. What are you doing? Where are you at? Where's your show at, man? Where's your show starting? Okay, and I'm watching Rasslin right now. Otherwise, I wouldn't totally come up and be on your show.
Speaker: but the
Speaker: No comment. No comment. but No, thank you Don't make her turn around and not bring me Taco Bell so she Did you I have to go kick Jeff's ass I'll be back Did you eat something at work today you need to eat something that's the best thing for a hair you got to eat you got to eat you got to get a tell you
Speaker: Don't knock it until you try it, woman. The cure, I'm telling you all the end all be all cure for a hangover, for a drunken state of mind. is And it's an Ohio thing. So you guys are gonna have to come visit Ohio. Why do you hate me? I love you. You know, you know, you can pull yourself up if it's the real Jeremy. I know. I do not have to pull you up. He's just sit there. Why would I? Why would I say it being me? Like if so anyone. No, no. and right Let's be honest. Let's be honest. like Like fucking no. We've had people jump up and acted like they were fucking. ah We've had fake Jeeves. We've had fake Brian. We've had. But ah
Speaker: trans The weather report, uh, dude, so the people behind Valley fair, which Cedar point or Cedar, whatever they're fucking called, they just, uh, they merged with six flags now, supposedly. Yeah. yeah Supposedly. But, uh, the funny thing about it valley fair is they're like, Hey, there's a minute - there's a river called the Minnesota River. I wonder if anyone's ever had the bright idea of building a fucking amusement park there. So... We have a river called the Ohio River and just on the other side of it from Ohio is a bunch of weird inbred people.
Speaker: We call them Kentuckians in West Virginia. Sorry boys. Then we have the Cola hot, uh, the, what's, what's, uh, Cuyahoga. Cuyahoga that catches on fire. Everyone's well. Well, which, which one was the one that, uh, the Mothman had to deal with? Was that West Virginia? That was, uh, that was, that was mount um, Mount Pleasant. It's Virginia.
Speaker: The ah one where they said that the fucking lights turned bright red like eyes. um We all know who. them yes ah But no, I think it was Mount Pleasant, West Virginia. I can't remember the name of it because Mount Pleasant, West Virginia is right there at the border and and you go across up that bridge that collapsed and yeah and killed all those people. That bridge actually comes into Ohio. Yeah, it's spotted in both. well help and and and ah you met a town in iowa We actually have a spot here in Ohio. down and Originally, when the first Mothman thing happened, they thought it was supposed to be a power plant or something because supposedly the author heard that it was going to be on the air. I know this Mothman shit. Why are we talking about the Mothman? when i went so but But anyway. but but but but
Speaker: but anyway Minnesota underwater. Well like like blazin said like blazin said we put ourselves on defrost you know global warming and all that so you guys are becoming the lost city of the lost state of minnesota instead of a land yeah pretty much pretty much but no like my wife dude you can be aqua land No, he's the deep if anything is the deep i'll give you but but ah super anyway man So there are rides there's like three rides that are well two that are underwater Like legit underwater underwater. Well ah a little bit forgoting water
Speaker: No, I can actually show you here. oh actually right or just a bottom part of Just the bottom part, really. But because, you know, the Minnesota news, they're like, oh, my God, very first underwater and the fucking parking lot. They shit not. It is so full of water that they literally have people on kayaks and canoes fucking. Oh, yeah. Good. Yeah, we had we had Jim Cantori and you know, you're fucked when Jim Cantori comes to your town, right? Right. Jim Cantori was down in Charleston, down in Charleston when I lived in South Carolina. There was a hurricane coming in, right? And we and no, no, wait, no, it wasn't the hurricane. We had the hundred year rings. Oh, yeah. It literally rained for like three months every day, bro.
Speaker: We were flooded like it was nuts. And Jim Cantori comes down there and he was reporting live on scene. And he's reporting in downtown Charleston, down by the market. And and the goddamn kids from the college Charleston, as he's reporting, are gonna leave. Right behind him, down King Street. They're just... to do And he was like, as you can see, ladies and gentlemen, the waters are so high that the local college kids are enjoying a little canoeing and kayaking. Oh, fuck. What the fuck. I hit the wrong thing. Sorry about that. Don't worry about it. What do you got? I was trying to put the fucking pitcher of the Valley Fair Flood.
Speaker: Yeah, like you had one news acre that was freaking out. She's like, well, where am I going to take my fucking kids? It's like, well, the whole park ain't underwater. You'll be fine. Well, let's be honest. ah second see Cedar Point wasn't the mean streak that that old ass roller coaster wasn't sinking for like 10 years. They still rode the fucking thing. I don't know about that. Hold on one second. i'm trying Where am I going to take my kids off vacation? I don't know. You live in fucking Minnesota. So anywhere, anywhere else. Come to Ohio. Go to Cedar Point. I got an idea. I got an idea. I'll have to share it. I'll share the screen. Columbus Zoo.
Speaker: because like you guys are going to laugh at this like a man the blue streak that's the one the blue streak is it has has sunk four inches well yeah that that's not here in minnesota but uh it dude it's so bad that there is people kayaking into ah fair and uh if i can get the video here hold on one second sorry well that's the funny thing here is like You know, we had we had the hurricane over the week or of the you know Friday and In at one point I was like fuck I'm on a cigarette so I went to the store the store was open and I had to walk like four blocks out of my way and
Speaker: But today when I went to his store, it's the same store where if you guys get like a drizzle, the parking lot floods and it's like, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So well, the way there. So right on the street corner, there's, there's a store, it's a liquor store called six. And like, if it, if it drops three drops of rain, it floods. Well, we had all this rain. So I had to go like six blocks around it. It took me 40 minutes to get there. And, Today when I went, dry as a fucking bow. Like no water had been there for a month. Yeah. I'll wait until Glick gets in here and I'll show you guys this. No, they're, so the one water ride that they have in a certain area of Valley Fair, completely underwater. Excalibur is just a bit underwater. Renegades.
Speaker: a little bit underwater. Yeah, but like the low part of the ride, it's not like the 50 foot drop. Yeah, but you yeah those rides, you can they're not letting anyone on, which is smart. Obviously. You're not gonna fucking do that, but the rest of the park is fine for now. But like I said, you know who in their right mind would be like, hey, you know there's a river there. We should build a amusement park, and it's a low enough grade. That's the same thing they did in Sandusky, Ohio. They got Cedar Point right there on the lake. Yeah, my wife was talking about, because she's been to that one in Sandusky, and I was like, is it any worse there? And she's like, not that I remember. Well, I give Cedar Point props. It's the most roller coasters in one location in anywhere in the world.
Speaker: oh yeah add a new one every year well now with them and where's my sandwich where's my sandwich hey nicky happy birthday said happy birthday earlier but you know yeah i one of those fuck Jarvis things she'd bring my fucking sandwich but no it did like when they were like Yeah, you know, you can all, they don't want you to bring your own vehicles there. Although, you know, people in lower, cars huh? How else are you supposed to get there? Uh, you can take a park and ride. So, okay. Okay. Yeah. But you can bring your truck in there. You can bring your fucking SUV as long as it's not good. And that's, I was, I was thinking about that today. I said, you know, money provided.
Speaker: I wouldn't buy a low -riding car. No. yeah Yeah, I have one, but only because I can't afford to buy a fuck -off truck. But if I had the money to buy a fuck -off truck, why would I buy a small car? Yeah. And there's literally people on canoes and kayaks going to the park that way. Yeah, but but at the end of the day, they could walk in it and they maybe waste begin tonight with the latest on why flooding across Minnesota and the fallout from it in Scott County. The Minnesota River is finally starting to come down its crest Friday afternoon in Savage made the top five highest water levels in its history. But with levels still in major flood stage tonight, the water is still impacting summer fun. W. C. C. O. Kirsten Mitchell takes us to shock a pee where the effects are still being felt.
Speaker: hi This isn't a line for the hottest ride at Valley Fair little unexpected, but is what it is It's to get on a shuttle bus to go to and from alternative parking lots. They make you park way over there by Canterbury Park, and then they shuttle you all the way over there. The park's own lot remains underwater, flooded by the Minnesota River. When you're out there, you know, you don't really notice, but when you're on wild things, some of the high uprisings, if you look around, you can see how yeah extensive it is and how how much flooding that really did have to occur.
Speaker: A unique experience for the Johnsons, who also found a hidden perk from the flooding. Fewer crowds. It was nice, though, because I mean, I've just. channel online for our we don't be just care Going in rides like we didn't even need to get off for one of them. It's the parking lot and three rides. Since then, the water's gone down a foot to a foot and a half in the parking lot. It was still a lot of fun, though. So it's it's it's went down. Yeah, but at the end of the day, what did you expect? It's flooding. what why i like That would be my last thought. like Let's go to the fucking park. God forbid, you know it's flooding and people are just losing their fucking mind. Agreed. It's like, like what did you expect? Oh my god, it's flooding, it's flooding, we're all gonna die. it's like ah
Speaker: One, there's a river right over there. And two, well we are having haard rainfall this year. If it's if it's raining and in your town is flooding, you don't have to go to the park. Put the kid in bathing suit. Don't have to play in the street, fucker. Dude, there's kids out there like bitching about having to get on a bus. I'm looking out there like, dude, that's a huge ass swimming pool over there. That's what I say. Fuck that. Give me in the truck. We'll we'll go play in the water. but But yeah, that that that's Minnesota life right now. It's like fuck hang me now. Yeah, they're not they're not too bright. They're Minnesotans, Canadian. Yeah. Yeah, I like well, but my kid was talking to me yesterday and he's like, yeah, there's so much water. I'm like, yeah, give it 20 minutes.
Speaker: Yeah, because you live in Mexico calm down. Well, no, but but we're in it. We're not worse. We sit on limestone like the whole area. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So so it can piss down rain for three days. It'll flood for 15 minutes. Like, you know, it during the hurricane it and just as I predicted, it was like a large thunderstorm without thunderstorm. Yeah, you know, you know, a lot of wind, a lot of rain and you know, There was a wall in the store. The store that I go to to buy my cigarettes was still open.
Speaker: And one of the, what I found funny is I have like 36 neighbors, 40, 40, 45. There's 46 houses here. I'm 42. There's no, sorry, 65, 65 neighbors, 64. Yeah. not including my house. Everybody boarded up their shit but me? And I'm sitting there laughing as so they're taking it down. I'm like, ha ha, you wasted money. Because everybody was pissed scared. They're like, it's a hurricane. I'm like, yeah. Look at the forecast. It's going to be a level two, one, one or two when it hits and it's hitting a hundred miles away. We got a little bit of a ring. So has it gotten any stronger since it passed through or is it just decimated now? No, nothing. It's like mid -storm, quote unquote, because the it hit landfor eight a landfall a .m. By noon, I was walking to the store.
Speaker: okay when i got back to the store from the store and it took me you know 40 minutes round trip and instead of the usual 20 because i'd go around the fucking lake and when i got back it rained again for another hour that was it it's it's so fucking ridiculous and then you got all these people that are like see the client the planet's starting to fight back against us it's like no hurricane's been around forever It's just like the tornado thing. There was this kid or on the news there. They're talking about, well, global warming is causing more tornadoes. It's like, no, it's not.
Speaker: Um, have you not seen like the biggest tornadoes like what 2017 2007 when it hit oklahoma there's like a tornado every fucking day Somebody was talking about like I saw tiktok the other day Somebody was talking about how hurricanes there's a pattern if you look at the world map There are certain places around the world that always get hit with hurricanes you know, lower US, Mexico, South America gets almost nothing ever, like below a certain point. But one year, like 20 years ago, a random hurricane, like they showed a map with all the lines of every hurricane ever recorded.
Speaker: And there was one hurricane or like 2000 or like 98 or something like that, that hit in this one area that never gets hurricane. And this person was like, oh, the world's crazy now because of global warning. The hurricanes are going to be more intense. What about this one in 1999 or 98? It where it's random it happens you know it's seasons and and and i've said this multiple times it's what they're like well what how do you ah stephen you say it's seasons but how do you explain that how sometimes you get a lot of rain or minnesota.
Speaker: ah We've had this problem at Valley Fair where it's gotten flooded before and I said because your seasons There's been seasons he's not even where we've gotten a foot of snow There's been where we've had like this last winter. We were breaking records with snowfall. It's like it patterned seasons whatever you want to call it it It's been like that for fucking forever. but Yeah. Another one of the fucking ice age was exactly the way it is now. You know, it's another thing that certain people need to explain what's going on. That's like Mount St. Helens. Now, scientists are freaking out saying that's going to erupt because just because now du it's due. It's going to do. Yeah. And now we're to erupt again. It's going to be huge.
Speaker: oh exactly but but why why has it interrupted because it doesn't fucking feel like it no it has nothing to do with what you what fucking car you're and when we were having those earthquakes here just recently like california had that one big one recently or what ah i think it was this year They were worried because of it was starting to get a little bit more bubbly in there, right? And yeah but it's just like a day. It's going to happen at the end of the day to worry about it. Yeah. Natural disasters happen all over the world, all the fucking time. You'll get your panties in a wash. I'll be the one guy ah living near Mount St. Helens watching Dante's Inferno in that bitch. Oh, no. No, like, oh, I when Wilma hit.
Speaker: Yeah, one was one of the biggest hurricane well the biggest hurricane I've dealt with. But before that was Gilbert, Gilbert was 88, which was the second biggest hurricane ever in Cancun. And I had an Internet cafe at the time. The day before we're boarding up windows and stuff, I had my car playing and I had Rocky like a hurricane playing on the stereo. And everybody was like, you're an asshole. I've been going. Oh, nine hundred presenting I was running three 12 inch subwoofers in my truck and my trunk. And I had like nine six by nines in the fucking car. And I had Rocky like a hurricane plane because I thought it was funny.
Speaker: Well, that's that's like fucking in 88 when California had the um had the earthquake during the World Series that year. And people in San Francisco are just other people are freaking out. And then there's people in San Francisco that are just like, oh, hey, this is a natural occurrence. Fuck you, Glick. Yeah, well, it's like. and just one shot the last the last I was still listening while Nicki and I were talking. I'm surprised Jeff didn't take us to break. I mean, he's perfect. But the last hurricane that I was in Charleston for, my neighbor and I, we had a big old hurricane party. Yeah. What happened? What was your last hurricane that? I can't remember what it was called, but it actually hit us. It just wasn't as bad as they thought it was going to be. Were you out there when Katrina hit?
Speaker: When what? Katrina hit. Katrina hit Louisiana. No, we had, Matthew was was one that hit, and it and I laugh at it because, you know, the kids' his mom, the kids' mom and I were still married, and she worked at a hospital, so she had to stay, yeah right? I took the kids up to Charlotte and we were in and the hotel we were at was in a ah suburb of Charlotte. It was, I mean, it was five minutes from the NASCAR museum or whatever. But the little suburb that we were in was called Matthew. And Charlotte actually got
Speaker: blasted by Matthew and Charleston didn't get shit. So it was like, Oh, we left Charleston to get away from Matthew and we went to Matthew and Matthew punched us in the face. just Well, but actually speaking of hurricanes, and I don't know, the last but yeah, the last hurricane that came through that actually yeah Charleston, I was down there for that. I was down there for, and this is, I've been gone five years now. ah My neighbor and I were like, let's have a fucking hurricane party roll. I was live streaming on Bariscope. We was hanging out. I was drinking. He was smoking. We was grilling. We was just having a good time, man. The fucking hurricane was blasting down. I had my garage door open while I'm live streaming. Well, I have a question for you, Chris, because when we're talking hurricanes, we're talking weather.
Speaker: um what the fuck are you doing in mexico sir tropical storm chris is uh about it looks like uh 65 kilometers All I can think of is what you said. Hey Chris, what are you doing down there? It's Hurricane Chris is Chris Farley from Saturday Night Live when he's in the El Nino wrestling of ah gear and he's like El Nino is Spanish for the Nino. yeah and Well, the truth of the matter is, Jeffrey. I'm here to say no one in the black me.
Speaker: and and dam the river did did you ever see that one click the El Nino one oh my god now that are the super fans one what what's going over there Todd I'm not just having an ever heart attack they're always looking like that guy he's just beating on his fucking chest cuz they're eating pola sausage going out of fucking season uh let's um yeah go ahead we have too much shit on here i can't add this picture delete some shit right because somebody look look real quick top storm chris god that's weird yeahen yeah comparatively speaking it's nothing
Speaker: This is the that what's her name took. Like it's almost all the way up by Texas. i You know, I heard you say earlier, you're you're solid choice and I just want to say I'm about to rock you like a hurricane, baby. Let's go. My name is just famous like well, the three of us on this panel are famous last words to every woman we've ever been with. Yeah. I'm about to rock you like a hurricane and she was like, so Sure you are. Sure you are. I'm about to disappoint you like a tropical storm. That's more like it. That's more like it. That was a spring shower past their hurricane boy. yeah hey like Hey honey, remember Night of the Twisters? Well this is gonna be like tropical storm, oh Jesus Christ, tropical storm Steven. You were so close Steven.
Speaker: Dude. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I was waiting for that sound Wednesday morning. I was hoping you were going to take your time off to work on your jokes, but apparently not. Yeah, because I work on my jokes. I work on my material.
Speaker: we We're going to take a real quick break and I know we're we're going a little old school with the music. However, I did promise you guys a Matt James solo song and I had to find one. We're not going to be worried about Matt James and I think this is a fan favorite. I think that all the guys enjoyed, but however. There is a participation part at the end of the song. So you guys got to join in. Son of a bitch. All right. Matt James. Chainsmoking Whiskey, ladies. Oh, yes. Yes. That's a good one. i do love so I don't know it well enough, but I'll do my best.
Speaker: Matt James is the lead singer of Blacktop Mojo. Check out Blacktop Mojo and check out Matt James on all social media and wherever you listen to music at. Show the guys some love. They've been with us since day one. We love them. I'm a huge fan. I think Jess become a big fan as well. You know, I think it's safe to say I am Blacktop Mojo's number one fan. All right. du kind of fan those like Play song, fan girl. I've been this close to Matt James before and he's a beautiful little red -headed man. He clicks the one at the blacktop mojo concert that's like... Matt James is the only redhead to have a soul, I'm just saying. Yes, Matt James comes out and all I hear is Dreamweaver in my head. Dreamweaver. He clicks the one that's got the sign that says we'll leave fucking Nicky for Matt James. I love you, Matt James. We could head for a good song.
Speaker: Alright. Hit my music. Hit. Hit. Well, hit the music. Play me a song and I'll hop to and spit on that thing. I'm not James. I'll hop to and spit on that thing. Billy Billy just looking at you like, please don't. This will be the one night. I mean, see what's going on on YouTube. Oh, hey. but since play us is on your piano man you on it yeah you I just played the song before. So we write back. Here's a little bit James with. Yeah, we're back here. just here it just a lot mine James with James smoking this game.
Speaker: I thought it'd be the cowboy killers They put a hole in my chest I didn't want to send, gave out the rich But then you still left Turns out you could get a rock bottom
Speaker: They say smoke em' if you got em' so I got em' lined up back to back Change smoke and whiskey, shot after shot Here's to your memory, that's all that I got And now it's like hell, I still smoke cigarettes
Speaker: It didn't do a damn thing, it just changed, yeah
Speaker: I've got, and now it's not hell I steal small cigarettes Now change smoking with gas as close as I close as I can From lighting back up, cause quitting's too hard So I just stay drunk, alone in this bar
Speaker: Chainsmoking whiskers shot out the sky We're here through your memory, that's all that I got And I wish like hell I still spoke to you
Speaker: Oh, that's not good.
Speaker: It's hard to sync that song up. Yeah, it is. Yeah, but I love that goddamn song. Now, if it was Judas in my mind, um I might have given you a little bit. That's like such. I think the reason I love that song, Jeff, and and and and I always say this to Jeff and not you Jarvis, because and Jeff and I grew up no but because I don't know. I don't know. Like I know Jeff and I grew up in the same area. Yeah. And Jeff and I, but don't worry like yeah but you know, we had those bonfire parties where I never failed, you know, uh, two, three, four hours into the night, everybody's singing along drinking and, and, and, and it's like a big group. And I'm, you know, you said, you, you said you grew up in the country too. So I don't know if you guys had that, but we grew up from nowhere.
Speaker: And it never failed. There was at least three dudes that showed up with guitars to every party we had or if somebody had a bad ass stereo that would crank up a song. yeah think Oh, dude. And we all sang along. And that's what that's like. That is like the perfect bonfire fucking song right there, man. You know, somebody at the bonfire party is going through a breakup. Yeah, that's why they're there. It's still a fun party song, but it's also a breakup song that you're drunk in their feelings about. And, you know, it don't need to be synced up. It's just, you just sing it as is. And, and, and, and and I love that song. And that's Matt James, lead singer of Blacktop Mojo. You can find both Blacktop Mojo and Matt James on all social media. I never wear your stream and listen to music hatches. Go ahead and get your fingers. You're talking and, uh, Go find them and give them a follow and show them some love. Let them know. Nonsense will nonsense or the nonsensical network. And, uh, you'll appreciate all their music. They got a lot of killer songs. With that being said, welcome back to nonsensical nonsense. It is Saturday night. We're hanging out. We're getting weird, getting a little crazy. We do what we do here every Saturday night. The door is open. It is what we call an open door challenge.
Speaker: Everybody and anybody is welcome to click that link in the chat and bring their asses on. Bring your ass, as Tony D used to say all the time. You are welcome to come up and hang out with us. We don't care if you love us, if you hate us, or if it's your first time seeing us, you're welcome to come up. We just ask that you put your penis away and you turn your camera on. That's all we ask. If you want to send your pictures of your penis, I'll give you Steven's Snapchat. That's not too much to ask at the end of the day. We are apart. We, we, think jeff we all are not sensible nonsense. I'm like he interview she down there in the bottom. This is a network production show, whatever you want to call it. I know really not sensible nonsense, not sensible network. Are you guys doing the math here? Yeah. It is the flagship show. It is the foundation of the network. Nonsense will nonsense. I am he and he is him. Wait. I am he and he, and he is me here.
Speaker: Yes. Be creator of all things musical, all things podcastical. Podcastical, nonsensical. Yeah, shut up. I'm making it rhyme, jackass. but but He's just the terrible person that's trying to be like, and in Spanish, it's Ponce Carrejo. Shut up before I put my testicles on your forehead. but this is typical so Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag, Teabag,
Speaker: he' just he's just hanging out He's like our little brother that we have to let hang out with us. We love him nonetheless. And we're the only ones allowed to fuck with him because you assholes fuck with him. Jeff will beat you up. Yeah. At least someone cares enough about me. Stick your arm out. Stick your arm out. Let's do that. Yeah, Jeff. Jeff will give you that new word. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Not Jeff. um i'm sorry not jeff Juan Wick. Juan Wick.
Speaker: and Anyways, you guys can - That's what she said. You guys can check out the rest of the network on all social media. All the other shows, we have seven shows that you guys can check out. You're bound to find one you're gonna want. Well, we have six and a seventh in the works. um Is that safe to still say, Jeravishi? It's on hold for right now. My - You're still on your period, we get it. yeah Check, beat me to it. yeah sorry i had medical emergency but yeah i guess uh are you okay yeah you're you're you're i wasn't okay i wasn't okay that day i was like get can you just going to detail ah what bar no um ah you got baker active didn't you yeah no so that who her she got the wrong size dildo i get it dude i've been there oh no tuesday tuesday i i just
Speaker: I woke up and I wasn't feeling right. And Wednesday I had message Glick and I was like, dude, I need a, I i don't know if I'm going to make tonight's show. It was my blood plug will definitely make you not feel right. Dude. Yeah, definitely. But no, like I, I would, my wife was worried about me on Wednesday. I will, I don't know. Was it medical or, and you don't have to go to any details. It was more mental than, you know, And my wife's like, well, you need you need to talk with Glick, you know. Yeah. Yeah, it was bad. Hey, I've been there. Let's just put the ugly jacket on you. They almost did. They almost did. Oh, I'm jealous. They're nice. You eat love yourself.
Speaker: i well i want one for yeah Well, because my wife ain't here those the longest hug I've ever had in my life, but you know there that's i said i want one it's like masturbation you know how to entertra penis You also know how to hug yourself agree, yeah and with Sunday show if anyone wants to take it by all means go ahead um I Yeah, this whole week was kind of a My therapist was... Steven, you can say it. You were worried about me in the hurricane. It's okay. Wait a minute. ah you Are you bowing out completely from Sunday shows? For now, yes. i my My mental state is not the best. Understood. but planned and these Plan meetings are on Sundays. We get it. So some I'm going five shows a week.
Speaker: go to the sports show but Okay, motherfucker, you're the one that's put more on your plate Monday, ah maybe that's why I fucking had such a bad day Tuesday is because fucking you on Monday Just saying, Mr. Paul. I have nothing to do with that. Don't you put that fucking evil on me, Ricky Bobby. That was that son of a bitch right beside me. This son of a bitch right here who brought up all that shit on Monday night. Mr. I do too many shows. Whose fault is that? Just say it. You know what, Steven, I'm with you there.
Speaker: I'm with you. Hey, Jarvis doesn't want to do a show on Sunday anymore. Well, I might as well add a fifth show onto my fucking. That's you, man. That's OK. Blazin and I got an idea we we might run with. Yeah, there you go. Perfect. Right there. I don't want to do it on Sundays, though. Hey, that's the thing like everyone thinks Oh Johnny's on it. I get it. Sunday's kind of a suck day. Oh, it's bad. But no, like it was so bad. Mark and Brian. No, I am. I'm fine with Monday's. I'm fine. with I'm fine with Monday's. You know how easy how much easier Glick's House of Music actually kind of think of it.
Speaker: Well, do I want to do it on Sundays, though? Sundays is my day of rest. You know how much easier it is? That's my thing, too. You know how much easier, though, a Sunday glitzhouse of music would be? Because the artists that I'm interviewing, typically, they're not doing gigs on Sundays. Friday is night. Exactly. Right? Exactly. I don't want to do Sundays. Nobody wants to do Sundays. That's my day. That's my day. That's my day. You know, I had message Brian. Yeah, if you're doing Sundays, you know. Pass. I messaged Brian. That's the boss. And I was just like, hey, Brian, how are you doing? And he's like, our Jarvis, are you OK? You never usually message me on TikTok. And I'm like, yeah, I'm fine. So then Mark today. That's how I know you're still alive. I get Stephen liked your video. And I'm like, all right. Brian, who? Alarm from Thursday show. I've never heard of him. No. He's like, you can't get off fucking Snapchat.
Speaker: and yeah and and Well, yes, yes, you do. Oh, why? Oh, yeah. I'll tell you later. Who's on Thursday? So I didn't know we had a Thursday show. ah Well, you guys are Marking Brian. Calm down. You guys know I love you guys. Brian actually asked me for my address so you can come see me if you know what I mean. Oh, yeah. Look at this fuck. you Wow. Well, fuck, you know, like piece of shit. Tell your mom, I said. But Dan, but but ah no, I I wanted to be there Wednesday. It's just I my wife was about ready to fucking call an ambulance. Well, I was going um yeah i was I was hoping everybody was going to be there. You weren't a big deal. Connor wasn't there either. Yeah, he didn't listen because I'm changing. I'm changing up Wednesdays again. And I wanted to tell you guys that I was hoping to tell you guys Wednesday.
Speaker: So you'd be prepared for this Wednesday, but I'll talk to you guys later on down the road. We don't need to have so. housing Are you doing better though, man?
Speaker: ah dana hooker's My friend OK and hookers, my friend. That's what you need. Well, no, it's I've been. I've been putting too much on the plate with, you know, doing this new job thing. and we Yeah, totally too much. Well, the one that's dumb enough to be like, oh, yeah, I want to do four shows. Yeah. Hey. When you. yeah fuckinghearted or What did I? What did I? In the last lesson I sent you because you don't like to return messages from me. The last thing I told you. Stop ever thinking. You're ever thinking and you're stressing yourself out, man. Just fucking have fun. I don't want ever think shit. I just fucking turn the camera on and go. Yeah, mister. That's all. Well, I have to do all the social medias for the show. How about this? And I told Mark, I told Mark. When it comes to show stuff. When it comes to being alive. I told Mark this. I said this to Mark. I said.
Speaker: from now on what it should be is monday if it's me and connor or whoever monday i'll deal with monday tuesday you don't have to that's that's that's what you should be doing dude if you can only if and this is this is well and that's the thing but when people are sitting there and say in snapchat going like hey what should i do what should i do it's like like jeff do what i do ignore them You bitches fucking gab like little fucking girls on snapchat How often do I fucking say snapchat? I fucking deleted snapchat. I don't fucking care anymore. I get it buddy Life Jarvis yeah like i do I almost did too. I almost did Wednesday. Just kidding. Do not delete yourself Jarvis No, and if you do do it live, um, no, but it's like
Speaker: Yeah, right. You know, you know, Jeremy, she you' gonna do like, if I have a heart attack, I have to go live. Well, I mean, I mean, Jeff, Jeff passed out. But, you know, God forbid, you know, you've passed out in the grass, couldn't show us. Just saying and Jeff passed out. And what did we do? We ridiculed him for the next two hours. Could have could have had an alligator, whatever dangerous that Chupacabra fucking sniffing them and fucking wouldn't have been able to see him get ripped apart. Just saying you would have heard it. jeff Jeff would have been like, finally, I'm going to die. Dude, I've been wishing that. so do yeah Like I told you, man, just fucking just just ah don't ever think, don't stress the show. Just turn the fucking camera on. by show like yeah I a lot behind the scenes. But as soon as that fucking camera comes on, man, I just rock and roll, bro. we all do you know it's yeah The one thing you always got to remember, and I get it, I struggle just like you.
Speaker: What I do is, is I stop fucking giving a shit. I don't care what this fucker thinks. How you doing, man? At the end of the day, the only person you have to please is yourself. And trust me, I'm be good at pleasing myself. It's on the door Saturday night. But no, put that link and bring your ass up here. I put the link. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. he said like we better Yeah, um I'll be fine i'll i'll walk as I always say Rule number one from now on if you're feeling something fucking call me. I'm not doing on anything. I'm home dick but yeah like ah like a Wait a minute, I thought I thought I thought Molly show me to trust me. He's good but my name's chairman um and um I'm so busy. I don't have time for anything
Speaker: Wally, what's up, man? What's going on, guys? Not much, man. Oh, shit. I just recognized who Wally is. Hey, hey, don't worry, Connor. You may not say it live, but I will show it live. What's going on, man? Oh, just chilling, catching the show. Figured I jumped on for a little bit. Jeff, I gotta say, he's got your beat. this is This is my longest and oldest friend from the Knox County area. okay okay Chris was my first friend when I moved to Knox. Jeff, we all went to the Career Center together, man. I know. wonderful i just the light yeah The light behind you, I was i got i didn't recognize.
Speaker: Here. I'll make it worse. Turn around. So you're facing. There God damn, dude, you've lost a ton of weight. He looks. Hey, yeah e bro. This is one of my best friends. We call him Wally from Pierce Motorsports and Reptiles over on YouTube. He's got his own YouTube channel. You know, I just added some more stuff from this couple past weekends ago. So I want to say some of my old high school friends on the podcast. Wally, send me your link to your YouTube channel and we'll do an interview with you. Oh, is it? Okay. We'll do it. We'll do an interview on Jeff's garage. Oh yeah. Definitely. Chris would be awesome on the show. Yeah. He's a car. Yeah. yeah Cause I have a car show. Yeah. I'll have to check it out, man. Yeah. We'll definitely have to get together. So what's been going on, man? How you been? Well, just working family time and all that pretty much. That's it. Nothing. that much
Speaker: Not much time for anything else. Shit, I get it. We live like a half hour away from each other. You know, like we've seen each other in the last five years ah once when you came to the boys frickin football game, man. That was the last time he said, hey, my son's playing football and it's my buddy Glick. And I was like, I wouldn't see them. And he was like, I got their own podcast. I'm on it right now with them. I'm just telling the old lady she she didn't realize it was you I was talking with. sure but Yeah. He was like, I got a surprise for you. Hand me an envelope and it had blue jackets, penguins tickets in it. for Nice. Yeah. Yeah. I can't make the game and I know you're a penguins fan. I know you're a blue jackets fan. Oh, hell yeah. I couldn't pass up giving you those tickets, man, when I couldn't make it because of work and shit. So I'm like, yep, you're the first person I thought of. Yeah, it was a good game too. Good seats, man.
Speaker: if i but i was literally like we out writing Well, the bad part the part of what those tickets was the company I was working for at the time no longer exists now in Mount Vernon. It's only in Columbus. Yeah no je yep so they were like a mount burnnon staple they've been around for since we were kids Yeah, they they ended up downsizing taking car supply out of Mount Vernon and now now that the only heating and cooling place to buy shit's now called famous supply in town now, so ah no shit Yep
Speaker: Oh, yeah. I was not sure. Thank you, Joe Biden. actually They actually shut down to actually just right after Covid. oh Yeah, that'll do it. So you, Connor. Fuck you. And i you um yeah, I've noticed that. I've noticed that, Connor. Only on the air will I call you a little bit. Connor's just mad. this but but but very thing Jeff don't kill anyone. Jeff doesn't kill anyone. He just helps them out with their fucking arm problems. Hey, so I'm like a chiropractor. Chiropractor. I'm just not very good at it. bob hey Hit me up sometime and I'll get on there with you guys and we'll get some stuff going. We do Tuesdays. We do Tuesdays. What time do you usually go on? We usually go on at seven, but we're actually discussing might be going early this Tuesday because Benji's got to go out of town soon.
Speaker: I was going to say, cause, uh, yeah, I worked third shift, so I worked 10 30 to six 30 in the morning. So, I mean, earlier, the better. I mean, just let me know. Yeah. You guys try to have good rest of your night. Good. The, I can with you. I'll see you guys later on. sorry everybody you but slow ah fucking yeah dude you guys have no idea the amount of love i have for that yeah He is funny. He is funny. a good dude it was at was at least you on as um now He was, he was one of my, one of, he was my first friend that I made when I moved out with my pops. And, uh, we did have a little hiccup once, one at a time. We, we almost, we almost came to blows one time and, uh, he was much, he was much larger than me. Uh, but, uh, I don't think he possessed the skills that I possessed, but, uh, we did almost come to blows one time in our friendship, but I got nothing but love for that guy. It was like legit.
Speaker: I love that cat to death. He's such a good dude. He's a genuine guy. I think he'll be really good on Jeff's car out garage. He's a car guy. Yeah. Uh, I did sub to his channel. So there you go. Send me a link because I'm too lazy looking up. She's fucking fireworks right there. Holy fuck. I'm too lazy. If I could figure out how to put the link in the chat, I would just put the link in the chat. So everybody could call. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. That's what That's what Steven's for. You're good at. Yeah. Well, yeah. i ah During break, I built something for you. Do you want to see?
Speaker: Well, don't fucking leave us hanging, numbnuts.
Speaker: There's the link, boys. Y 'all love me some CapCut, boy. There you go. Right there in the chat. Anybody watching, there's a link to my boy Wally's YouTube page. Yeah. Pierce Motorsports and what is it? Motorsports and Reptile. Cats got like **** snakes and lizards and dragons yeah and all I like. Lizards and dragons. Oh my. Oh my. Yeah. ahey Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: yeah The only reason I had that lined up Steven. Yeah. Last last Tuesday's episode was was she says man caves and and barnedominiums oh my Dude, that was a great episode. I watched that and I was not got my best, not our best, but I actually had fun. ah I think our best episode was the the kick cars. More of a visual episode, but I think I think your best one was the one you had with the. um The categories one where it was like you had a best show, destroy, whatever, keep them, keep them correct. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Would you say, Glenn? I think it's funny that you've had a show that you. Wait, what? I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you. Yes, motherfucker. oh ah dry walk and red one look go to chip's garage We're talk about cars. Jeff jeff was watching Harley Davidson, the Marlboro man. I was watching Beyond the Law. Oh, that's the other one I love. Brian Bosworth. I don't know. Brian Bosworth, Stone Cold. I'm thinking of Stone Cold. I'm thinking of Stone Cold. I'm watching Stone Cold. I'm over here in Wishland watching Stone Cold. Stone Cold is not a bad movie. It's just one of those 90s movies that like, I i wish I would have done a review on that movie. I don't know. Terrible acting, terrible screenwriting. scar and you Dude, it's a movie with Brian Bosworth. it's Calm down.
Speaker: Yeah, I was going to say, terrible if if you let me finish, I was going to say, terrible Brian Bosworth. But I love the boss, man. boss. It was a movie right up his alley when the whole ah biker or a cop was going to go undercover. Like Charlie Sheen would have never in a million years thought he could have played that kind of character. Wasn't that movie based on a true story? True story, yeah. Yeah obviously was that but you know the funny thing about that is you can never find the actual story of what did no because yeah because there's still the bikers are still looking for the guy well at least and that's what they say at the end of the movie well hey hey everybody hey everybody join a motorcycle club because we hate the government or we hate the law and we don't want to abide by any laws to
Speaker: but we have more laws than fucking Korea. a just whatli dixson but but depends on the problem yeah does but just early who like to jerk each other off Charlie Sheen did amazing in that movie and the soundtrack was great too. I love that movie. Why does everyone keep calling me a dildo? Or the fat guy in there. The fat guy in there when he. That fat guy is like he's one of those those guys. He's fucking stupid famous. Hey, man, come on. I'm peeing myself here. I'm peeing myself here. Fucking Charlie Sheen throws that stick of dynamite. Yeah. Yeah. Charlie Sheen has an undercover biker though that like out of all that he could have done. Yeah. Tiger bullet.
Speaker: Tiger blood, that's tiger blood man. ah said I got a kick out of it. So Mark was talking about the picture that you guys put on where he did the thing and he's like, man, I sometimes it just, I wish they wouldn't have used that. I'm like, why? It showed that you were Joe Exotic's best friend. Exactly. Like you could a pass stop for them know could have been Joe exotic's first husband for all we fucking know and all honestly though for for as large as that Tiger King shit went I would have loved to be on it just for 30 seconds but like yeah, I was on that shit Jeff you were on lamb and I was the tiger
Speaker: and yeah you you don't like the pictures i chose for the stuff do what i ask you guys agreed and Everyone bitches about all that shit and me it's just like all I said was damn you found that picture of me like holy shit tur Well, yeah, I believe we're not dude is not easy until I started following your wife Was it easy to find a picture of you like five pictures? jarvis call me a fucking creeper he's like i'm gonna block you on facebook and click god' so so sense about it
Speaker: hell fucking care you and our friendship sort of bench Like I got such a kick of it cuz I'm looking at that picture and I'm like, dude You probably had to fucking dig for it because dudes like I was just out of high school No, when was the first year of the hell cats? i Because I was in a Hellcat, because Brian was driving a Hellcat. Like the Hellcats? The Car, yeah. Was that 16 or 17? I was just like, I was sucking at the car. I want to say 16. I want to say 16. 16. So yeah, that's not bad. That was young Jeravishi.
Speaker: Jerry she was still trying to fucking penis I Love that you think that's old. That was yesterday for us Wow Yeah, evidently back in the day like I thought that it was like cool to have the fucking cutout Evidently back in 2016 I thought my look was the fucking generic Larry the cable guy fucking lift is like
Speaker: Let's let's be honest we've all had bad looks your your your look what Joe dirt and Larry the cable guy had a baby ah joker and larry yeah jeff If that's not a fucking meme I swear to god I will dude I want to see that well I gotta see that i want to take you that picture want to see that Just with the fucking mu my
Speaker: oh but No, because well if you look at the picture really good it looks like he's got long hair behind his hat Yeah, that that was long hair Jarvis. ah I don't know why I fucking thought I love that you think that's long hair. Oh It was it was worse if you can go back and find me and like a yeah, I Dude, me in high school, I had the full on Kurt Cobain fucking curtains. Oh, yeah. I'm glad those pictures don't exist anymore. OK, we get it, fucking Bray Wyatt. Calm down. Dude, I can't have long hair here. I can get out of the shower right after washing my hair. And I go outside for five minutes. Looks like I haven't washed my hair for six months. And as I told Nikki, if I had the patience, I'd grow all my hair out again.
Speaker: I think I would, I don't have the patience either. I get bored and I'm like, fuck this. When I first moved it, when I first moved down to Charleston, I had a full head of hair and it was down past my shoulders. And actually, I mean, I could rock some out here, but I got, I got hair to die for. Okay. I say that, I say that because a lot of women come up and they're like, oh Man, I love your hair. Look at that Squatch. We should call fucking animal control and have him deported back to his fucking forest e fo and these didn't have shit on me All right calm down but like oh My god Jeff Jeff ah Jeff I got another fucking idea for you.
Speaker: Glick's head on Farrah Fawcett's. Oh, no. please Yeah. Yeah. I'm working on first. I am so sorry. I am sorry, world. ah kids ah Walked into that one, buddy. As soon as he fucking said it, I was just like, Jeff, if your fucking brain isn't going to that fucking picture. The one on the poster. i
Speaker: so idea great minds sink alike don't we jeff just thought of that i like fun games too you I can only build stuff so fast! you know what this is coming you like i get This is ah guy coming from a guy that literally fucking said, you know, hey, even though Jarvis is having a medical emergency on Wednesday, you know, he's on his period. Thanks, asshole. Oh, no, we both did that. I didn't. Yeah, I know. Both of you are assholes. Because it's funny. It's funny. I'm sorry, buddy. It's still funny.
Speaker: But you guys are on your period. You know, I click. Oh, he's sending something over. Yeah. You can delete that. ah There, I deleted that part. No, the video I made real quick. Which one? The the um the hakua. Because there's already so much shit on here that I have to delete something every time I fucking add something. Jesus Christ, people. It's all he's got like four hundred things in life. You ain't just whistling Dixie, buddy.
Speaker: ah here I Got you a click since you're not doing anything. Just fucking delete that video of what Jeff won. I Already did already. already Okay. No, I I'm I'm building something else. Ah Can we get rid of fucking Steve Carroll here, I don't know why he's on there I like jesus christ i'm already having fucking it's not carols correll correll whatever i have to go take a piss what are you guys yelling and screaming about i thought you were doing something silly why would i do anything
Speaker: You know what? You know what? I don't fucking care. I love it. Oh, that was great. I don't. Yeah, I saw Mark made that the other day and I was like, yeah, I get it. I'm sexy. I get it. You know what? You know what? Just for that, Jeff. That's all right. Why? Why? I didn't make it. Mark made that. Well, OK, fine. Mark. Good job, buddy. Don't give him too much.
Speaker: Hey, Mark made something. Yeah, I'll give him that. He at least made something. Yeah, come on now. Hey, it's not easy making memes and shit on the fly. I'm just saying. Well, he didn't make it on the fly. AI does wonders. Oh, no, that was. That was that cap cut. Yeah. Cap cut is awesome. There is no way in hell that money in the bank is going six fucking hours. please go oh my fucking god like
Speaker: what is your camera but Yeah, you can do better. I gotta just throw it together. line on I need to. know and actually fuck No, well, the thing is is like I need to flip it. I need to flip your face. So, it's going low in the other direction. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's what you need to do. It's not that Jarvis needs to, you know, you've done better work. I see what and see what you guys see what you're going for there but you've done that yeah
Speaker: I'm not feeling. I'm surprised Jeff hasn't put his face on Don Johnson's head. No, um know I'm Mickey Rourke, buddy. I'm sorry. I'm Mickey Rourke. I think Glick is. No, yeah, Glick is fucking it on Johnson. You're the one fucking that shoots him in the shoulder. oh hundred joe joe jeff I just got to say you might be Mickey Rourke now after all the plastic surgery jerry and all that shit. But you are not not are not Harley Davis from Harley in the normal. I am so good. He does not look good today. He looks like fun he does. He looks like a fucking vacuumed face. He does. look He does not look great. I agree.
Speaker: That's what happens when yeah you know transition from being a pretty good actor into boxing and then go like, oh, I only had a few fights. Fix me. Yeah. He definitely had more than a few more fights. I don't even know how many fights he had, but it wasn't like who they made such a Mickey Rourke. He was a boxer. Is he really I didn't he was I I don't know if it was actually a fucking Badass boxer dude was legit. Did he box before he acted or did he take? aa he box but okay He was he was a legit boxer So he went the Randall Tex Cobb route where he was a boxer first or marsh Randall Tex Cobb I think was a martial artist first though
Speaker: which that fucking dude oh I don't think Mickey Rourke is a martial artist. No. Randall Tex Cobb. Sure. You've never seen Uncommon Valor? No. I can't say that I have. I might have. 67? No. That's the 80s. What? That was the 80s. It even had Patrick Swayze. It had Fred Ward in it. I love Fred Ward. Gene Hackman. I don't like think i've ever seen that movie. it It's pretty good movie, um but no, Randall Texcob. He was also in Ace Ventura, the first one because where Ace Ventura steals. Are you talking about the guy who stole the dog? Yeah, OK, OK.
Speaker: He was a legitimate fighter back in the day. And then I think he jumped into acting. Well, that's like Vinny Jones shit out of Patrick Swayze. And many Jones was a hell of a soccer player boy. He was a straight up. He's got he still has the record of being thrown out of a game fastest. ah Mickey Rourke from 64 to 70 Jones. Yeah. Oh, really? Mickey Mickey Rourke from So, where the hell did it go? I just had it here. Uh, at age 12 Rourke won his first boxing match as a 112 pound flyweight. That doesn't surprise me. little
Speaker: I love it. Harley Davidson from 64 to 73. Rourke compiled an amateur boxing record of 27 wins, including 12 straight knockouts. Well, you know, who is another, uh, including a first round knockout over John Carver and decision victories over Ronnie Carver and Javier, one of the Villa Nueva and three defeats. And he had three defeats. Wow. Seven at three with 12 straight knockouts. do it he's a du
Speaker: Mickey work. I bow down, but no, I started boxing in a 71. I love started acting in 71. I'm sorry. I love then Harley Davidson and the Marlboro man where he's fighting big John stud, the big dude. Yeah. And he's like, he's, he's fighting them. And then he's like, <unk> like he's winning not shit and all that. And then fucking gets taken out. And when big John stud grabs him in the balls and Don Johnson's like, he was doing good up until that point. good i up one
Speaker: I literally just started watching it again. I love that movie. Alyssa never even knew about that movie. She didn't know about Beyond the Law, which I never knew Beyond the Law was an HBO TV movie. Was it really? I didn't know that. Yeah. I did not know that. That's kind of impressive. He made his feature film debut in Steven Spovart's 1941. 1941.
Speaker: Oh, is that that comedy movie with Belushi? I, I think that... Uh, Atticroy, Ned Beatty, John Belushi, John Kennedy, Chris... but from john ah Shut fuck up. Oh my god. You have a serious hate for John Candy. It makes you an asshole. Hey, the moosh shit told you your asshole. You don't make me an asshole, I'm a package for you. So fuck you.
Speaker: You're not make the meme of John Candy telling Glick the moosh. I told you outside go fuck yourself. What's the dead ass in his mouth? I'd love and I love invocation. He punches Listen here John Candy. You're one donut away from a fucking heart attack. Get the hell out of the way with your club Cory already had a real hell out of it Wait, well, say it again. Well, evidently Glick's having a stroke. Yeah, you spell toast, buddy. Hey, Glick, what are you doing over there? Don't worry, Jerry, she just having another heart attack. harder i give be right I love that Bob Swarsky superfan skit.
Speaker: A certain Hurricane Ditka. Hurricane Glick.
Speaker: It should work out over there, buddy. Nothing. then I'm kind of scared. hey what ah what ah What else do we have to talk about tonight? What else can we talk about tonight? ah Well, you could talk about the new supermodel.
Speaker: Get the sexy motherfucker, boy. Oh, dude, it's so good. I spoke to tits. Yeah, you got great tits, buddy. I think you got caught or beat. Got got to get the high beams on there, I see. yeah Oh my God. you know what You know what, Jeff? We're not worthy, man. I'll get it. We're not worthy. Yeah, yeah total total nick i'm just saying you are my Walter Goggins buddy, let me tell you just saying just saying so white all right so so soer you guys smash her pass so go smash so my sma man You may be a double bagger
Speaker: yeah You're a butter face, buddy. I'm just saying, you're a butter face. I'm just saying. Everything's great but your face. You don't have to hit it from the front. You can always hit it from the back. Just saying. oh my I'll run my hands through your hair and everything, baby. Make sure you run your hands through a beard, too. Yeah. That's the one thing. just a you know Based on your facial hair, you obviously have a big black bush, too. I'm just saying. ah The carpets do match the drapes. Oh, fuck it. The case the but carpet.
Speaker: you ah oh god Don't remind me, I got a man scape so bad. I think Dolph Lundgren was a legitimate fighter, too, at one point. No, Dolph Lundgren is a legitimate fucking smart guy. scientist He's a scientist or something. MIT, man. Motherfucker graduating magna cum laude, MIT. Like, he's a legit rocket scientist. Like, yeah, the dude can literally build you a fucking SpaceX rocket, right? I think it was funny what how much he he did with upper body than lower body, though.
Speaker: Yeah, but you know what? If you're as smart and as big as Dolph Leonard, you can do whatever the fuck you want. Yeah, but here's the thing. You get into a legitimate fight with someone that, you know, like a Bruce Lee type guy. All he has to do is fucking kick you fast enough. You're not blocking that shit once again. Once again. The thing is, if Bruce Lee or somebody goes up against Dolph Lunder in one good punch, and Bruce Lee's taking a nap. Well, well like like Brandon Lee even said in the behind the scenes of the movie that him and Brandon Lee did together, Dolph Lunder and him, is that, you know, that's the thing with the guy with that much power that way. Just putting all that power that way, knock you the fuck out. But if you dodge that power, he's fucked.
Speaker: Well, I, you know, I used to tell a lot of guys, you know, somebody who's been in a lot of street fights and stuff like that. I still people, you might be faster than me, especially like little dudes like Jeff, but that little man syndrome. I'm a 47th degree black belt and I went to the great. I'm not ah anything built. I got a JC Penny motherfucker here. You hear these guys like you hear these guys and they're like, I'm not afraid of you because you're bigger than me because I'm a 47 degree black belt and I went to the Gracie School of Jiu Jitsu and I'm an m MMA fighter. And it's like, yeah, it's all well and good. Don't let me get one. Well, it's like very.
Speaker: A very good ah very good friend of mine, Ricky, I'll shout about it. I love this cat to death. Very good friend of mine. um here i bet him when i down when i met I met him when I lived down in Charleston. He was an MMA fighter. He was a scary dude in the cage, right? And i always we always joked around. I said, I'm telling you, I put these fucking bear paws on you. Yeah, well, and my neighbor said the same thing. and and and and and and we was goofing around one night and uh I got a hold of him and I locked him in and with all his training and all of his knowledge and his know -how and I don't I don't know shit about shit. Well, I'm not I'm not the greatest fighter in the world but if I get you in the right position. Yeah, that's for a few years. I did Muay Thai for for a couple years. Yeah, I'm not I'm not
Speaker: But we were scooping around one night and I and i got ahold of him and I'm twice his size. That size came into play. I locked him up, man. I locked him up and I told myself, I'm not letting go until you tap and I made him tap. you yeah and i ro like That's the crazy thing about little guys like me. We won't tap. You're going to have to kill him. He wasn't a small guy by no means. He's not a small guy, but I locked him up, man. And i was and I'm not saying that's going to be the outcome every time because no.
Speaker: I mean, yeah, well, the you know, Brad Pitt said it next, if you're a big reach, they, they, they they'll wear out eventually. Little guys like the wolf fight till we're burger. Well, youre i don't, don't, let don't, don't, don't fuck upside because sometimes the guys got stamina. Like I know guys who are that rare anomaly and I joke around, yeah, you'll outrun me. but Don't let me catch you in that first 50 yards. Well that the thing is fifty yards I'm gonna keep up with you. Don't let me catch the the big guy the big guy may not that's not for but yard for yeah The big guy may not be able to catch you running but as soon as that fucker catches you you're done
Speaker: Well, ask your neighbor if he wants to play a game. But but but once upon it once upon a time... Calm down there, Jeff Seagal. Calm down, Juan Wick. You know, once upon a time, I used to do the tough man contest. And there was no and there wasn't weight classes or anything like that. I'm not big enough to compete. And there wasn't weight classes or anything like that. And then and me, at the time, I was young. I was in my... late early and he was six. liny know and If you remember me in high school, like I was, I was stout. You know, I was a big dude. I was stout. You were never fat though. You're, you're not fat guy. I was stout. Like I was, I was stout. Like Bob was Bob. Yeah. and i Yeah. You guys are just stockies. We weren't like John Cena rips, you know what I mean?
Speaker: right But we were what we were solid. And and and and um this is like third round tough man contest. And this cat dude, he I probably had 150 pounds on him. I easily had six inches on him. Come out, touch gloves, dap it up, whatever. referates Does the rules. We go back to our corners. The bell rings. This son of a bitch hit me 50 times before I even got out of my corner. I don't know how long he got there so far. I don't know where he came from, but this son of a bitch hit me 50 goddamn times. He bagged your ass and run. And I was like, you little son of a bitch. That's so that's that's the go -to. Give him a quick speed bag and run away.
Speaker: I was like, all right, stop hitting me because it hurts. So I end him up and I hit him all wrapped up and tangled up. I was like, I was like this weird punch. I was like adding him up and I was. Yeah. yeah lot And every time I'd punch him in the face, he'd hit me 10 times in the face. And I was like, I don't know how he's doing. No, I don't have a ah hard punch. Like, because I don't have a whole lot of weight to put behind. I'm 150, maybe 160 pounds total. Damn, he's shorter. He's smaller weight than I'm a small little fucker.
Speaker: I'm five three. I look mad, but I'm not. At the same time, the one thing I've always said, the bigger they are, the harder they fall. All you got to really do is. Yeah, but. That's why big guys don't kick. That's why big guys don't kick because you grab that leg and you get them off their. Not necessarily. Because I've gone up against guys split size. And you don't want to catch that foot because you're going to go flying along that line. but that you know but that it has nothing to do with likeck it has has to do with guys blick sock
Speaker: i will fight anybody I don't care. but at the end of the day I'm going to think about it before I get in the ring with somebody. click so There's a big difference there's a big there's a big difference from ah we'll say we'll say a guy that was five eight and and and and and and 150 pounds lighter than me. Yeah, he he he beat the hell out of Yeah, you got a Superman punch at you. However, I himbed him up. I locked him down. well and that's that's but But there was a moment where we where we legit squared up.
Speaker: And we're squared up and I'm not, and and i'll and I'll never, forget I'll never forget this cat. We squared up and dude was just like, pe dude, straight face, straight head punches, hitting me in the mouth, jaw, nose, eye, everything. And while he was hitting me, I was coming back and, and I was well over 200 pounds at that time. I was bringing 200 pounds to his 180 pounds or 150 pounds, whatever. did I rock him and when I hit him one time and he stumbled back, he did like the Ric Flair flop. He stumbled back and then he just said.
Speaker: But I got to give homeboy mad props because, and I don't know what I was doing. Oh yeah. And if we would have went the distance, if I didn't have the stamina, whatever the case may be, he went 100 % on the card. He beat me. He beat that. This dude beat the hell out of me. He was punching and kicking me. I did everything by a single person in my life. Well, that's like me and my brother. I swear to God, I shit you not. The bell rang, and the bell wasn't even done ringing, and he hit me 50 times in the face.
Speaker: me and my brother. I don't know where he came from. I don't know how he got there so fast. What boy hit me was just putting area and I. In the blink of an eye. Yeah. Well, that's the, that's the thing. That's, that's kind of like the small guy move. Guys. Like, I don't know. Yeah. Well, big guys, 90 % of big guys, you, they got four or five good punches in them. If you can get past that, you got, but a little guy, Oh fuck. I'll have to go all night. Let's play this game. Yeah. Yeah. Well, thats that's my other go to move. I'll jump on your back and just start beating your ear. That's like. That's what I said. I'll just hit me up. I'll just lock you up. I'll just lock you in, man. I'll put these bear balls on you and I'll lock you. I'll just tickle the shit out of you, son. Then you let go. bit My my brother always.
Speaker: My my brother always relied on. My brother always relied on the strength aspect, where I was always like, I waited for my brother most of the time to try and do his best. Give her a kiss. Take a break. Give her a kiss.
Speaker: yeah What's that taste i what fuck you yeah but like? the man's feet But, you know, it it was one of those things where my brother, like Jeff said, and like you said, you know, he had those four or five good punches and it's just like me, um I was all alike yourself out at the time. And and I just I was doing rope a dope. I was like covered over here, letting him hit me. And my dad's just like, he's in the dick keith get out of there let go to and then
Speaker: right your dick we calm calm down john great did you motherfucker calm down johnny cage i was facing go If you're going up a big fuck like glick and you're my size y 'all dude first punch That's right to the dick dude. I'll give a fuck spoiler alert four sisters This is that area down there. You ain't got to worry about it. Like five playings like what Wednesday. Come on. Well, once my brother tired himself out, I kind of just went like my turn and I yeah I started burying kicks to his fucking abdomen. And after a while he started spitting up blood a little bit. I'm like, he's like, I'm not done. I was just like, OK, kept him right. However.
Speaker: However, somebody come come flying at you getting ready to punch you. Kick him in that shin. Watch him walk right into your fucking fist. It's funny as hell. Because then it's like, what the fuck just happened? And then my brother couldn't deal with the speed. So he tried to throw a kick. I grabbed the kick and I kicked out his other leg, got him into a fucking half ass ankle lock. And I'm just like, you ready, bitch? I've never been a kicker. I will absolutely kick the fucking shit. Let's go. Let's go, Glick. Jarvis, if you want it, let's get it. Let's go. The wrestling match of a century. See, that's the thing. I can't spar. I can't spar. If Glick and I got in the ring, I'd be like, dude, I want to do it.
Speaker: But if I'm pissed at you, oh, man, I'm not. But here's the thing. Me and Glick afterwards, we're going to go out for fucking beers. He'll have his beer. Oh, no. And I get that. I'll have my whiskey. But I can only really hit somebody really hard out of anger. I got to be pissed. One of my best friends, I grew up with him. He was actually, he was bigger than me. State champion. If it wasn't for the goddamn drugs, this cat would have went on to college and he would have been It was a great wrestling. God, he used to fucking. Can I just can I say this? Isn't it not weird with how ah small towns like how we grew up in? If you're not, you're in sports. Some of them do a lot of drugs and then they don't do nothing after that. Well, the well, and they're the ones with the fucking most talent. what But here's the thing. What else is there to do in a small town, Steven?
Speaker: drink Exactly. Drink. we could dude like Why drugs? Why drugs? Hugs? That's the thing. I get it, buddy. I'm not the drug guy, but you and I both know multiple people that you were like, wow, dude, you didn't really let yourself go. cause you smile oh yeah know one of my one of my One of my best friends, I grew up with a kid. Actually, outside of him, Uh, his brothers and I are, we're, we're all brothers. We, we literally grew up together. We've known each other our entire lives. I got, he would piss me off because we'd just be hanging out in the yard. And next thing I know he grappled me and take me to, and I was like, all right, you know what? You got me down on the ground and I would just start.
Speaker: laying in on the kidneys and just start fucking working his kidneys. I'm going to make you piss blood for a month. like Then he would like switch positions. It's like, all right, now I'm going to start working on your fucking help. Like that, that spot right above your elbow. yeah I can hit it. If I can reach it, I'm going to start working and I'm going to force you to stand up. And when we stand up, You're not grappling me again, because when you come in for the grapple, I'm gonna knee you right in the face. And this dude, I mean, this is one guy that literally had got me hemmed up multiple times, and he was bigger than me. he had I had to tap out. But yeah dude, I would start putting those fists to him. And if we would stand up, and that was one and one thing that used to kill him, was when we would stand up and he would shoot, he would go to shoot.
Speaker: I mean, I would need a hell out of well well the thing the the thing with thing with shooting and wrestling. And I was always though, when I was a wrestler in school, I'd never state champion. I hate wrestlers. I did too. But like um every time they would shoot on me, you know, the best thing to get past that is you just, you fucking hug them like this. Lay on it, lay on it. Yeah, you're pretty much. Yeah, just. However, however, you know, all out if if you, if they know what they're doing, that that doesn't help.
Speaker: yeah However, yeah like when I when I i wrestled I wrestled dot freshman and sophomore year and I used to practice With the guy that was in the 200 pound weight class Yeah Because I'm like if I can take this motherfucker down somebody in my own weight class, which is 130 pounds I'll fucking I'll why um my year which was when I was up at ah Unity my freshman year I wouldn't know. i went i I actually my freshman year in high school for the Unity Eagles. freshman freshman
Speaker: Yeah, what year? I graduated in 2011. So four years. Oh, seven, I think I was close. I said I was six. But, uh, like I went that whole wrestling year zero. I didn't get the only wins I would get is if the other team didn't have someone in my I had a I had a they would like you. They would like want you to cheer. And I'm just like, why am I fucking cheering? No, I had a buddy budy on the wrestling team. He literally every school we were wrestled. They didn't have somebody in his weight class. He was so small Yeah, and he's like I already got my letter. I said bitch. You haven't been on the mat once. No what I won three time Fuck you and and like they were gonna sweat on here They were gonna give me a letter My sophomore year after I had won like two or three matches and I'm like just give it to someone else Give it to someone that does not I it took me
Speaker: four matches to get my letter um because the one guy I went up, the first guy I ever went up against freshman year was state champion the year before. I was like, yeah, I got this. One what one school I got had to wrestle had a girl in my weight class and I'm like, oh fuck I never got that i never i like They're like what's wrong? yeah you You're gonna take it easy on a girl. I'm like this girl was state champion I think she'll have me on that mat in like two minute two seconds she did i didn't even fucking I Didn't even finish the first set yeah didn name Finish
Speaker: Oh, he finished all right The girls like the girls like do you want me to take it easy on you? I'm like, do you just want me to tap out because I said this match ain't going any further than this. You've already won. No, at the end of the day, at the end of the day, she went to see or fucking doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Every time I would step foot on the mat. I would give it 100%. I don't care if I was going up, like I went up against my cousin, he and I were the same weight class, we were in a tournament. Okay, Jeff, and we get it. Fucking reverse chiropractor, we get it. No, no, no, no. Fucking amazing. No, I'm i'm not saying that. Even if like, I went up against a state champ, I gave it my best because if I beat this motherfucker, oh my god, I will never stop talking about it. Granted, I didn't win, I didn't have a chance. But
Speaker: That girl asked her if she want and ah she if he wanted her to take it easier. why like I don't want you to take it easy on me. I just want you to be easy. Yeah.
Speaker: ah take your own Like he's easy take her twice, buddy i get and easy and nice Sunday morning, baby we We had we had and so there was two people in my weight class and the other guy one wrestler and I was like really I'm like so what you get your ass kicked by a girl I'm like dude, she might be fucking hot and i ask you out if you do a good enough job hey And she came up to me, and she's just like good job, and I'm like I didn't even last one fucking second with you. I'm like calm down. She's like well and we got not left she's looked over she looked over at She looked over at the other guy, and she's like at least you're not a pussy like him. Yeah, at least oh don't worry jarvis um that is the last the Second with most women either But you know hey we yeah i'm like oh I saw you naked. I'm done
Speaker: yeah We we had a school that had a a girl on their football team that we played. Dude, so you you're you're so I know though I like I. I did. I, first and foremost, you're playing football. You're on the guy's team. I don't care. You know what? I'm not going to be easy on you. Oh, no, we didn't either. but She can deliver forearms. I fucking blew her up so bad on a play. I fucking annihilated her. And then like, I get back to the sideline, you know, I get back out there over by the bench and have like, yeah oh, I fucking wrecked everybody on that play. They're like, oho good job. Who's the girl? i'm like
Speaker: Hey, whatever. She's in fucking, she's not on the field. You know, it is what it is. After the game, after the game, wheel we were doing like that, you know, you know, after every match or after every game, you, you go through and you high five everybody and say good game type shit. Like she pulled me out to the side and she was like, Hey, I just want to thank you for not going easy on me because I'm a girl and most guys they don't. And she was like, I, you know, I really appreciate that. And I was like, I didn't mean to. It was just. He does a moment and she was like, no, you know, thank you. I was like, Hey, all right. You know, uh, she was like, I look forward to seeing you next year. And I was like, Hey, and I'll see you next year. Uh, we've seen each other next weekend, but that was neither here nor there. ellen that's the thing like She was actually a really cool chick. We went out on a couple of dates. Um, I'm not going to be Jeff and be like, Oh, i totally banker no, we went out on a couple of dates. She was actually a super cool chick and she was actually really good at football.
Speaker: that lady i wish i would dont have johnte but yeah now she was super cool The lady I ended up wrestling she was just she she later ended up you know just shaking my hand I'm just like you're a wrestler just like I am I said you know at the end of the day it's fine granted now if the other guy would have wrestled there he might have gotten a phone number I'm just saying
Speaker: The guy's like, you really got a phone number? I'm like, hey, sometimes it's worth sucking sometimes. yeah yeah Like we're on the same uniform. We're all doing the same thing. But I never had a problem with women wrestlers. I never had a problem with that. I never had a problem with a girl. That was for my senior year at Chicago lakes, tried out and everyone was like, Oh, we got to go easy. She was blowing. She was fucking going past these guys on fucking seam routes, quick catches. And these guys were like fucking state caliber, even though we had never been to state and like, they're like, okay, I'm, this is going to be an easy pick.
Speaker: And someone asked me they're like, what do you think about it? And I'm like, doing her fucking job. That's all. That's all that matters to the video of the the NFL Network reporter. She got who was she going up against the camera, who she was going up against. But, uh, they were at, I think they were at Brown stadium. It was before the game and they lined up and she wouldn't wind up in the receiver position and she fucking broke his ankle son. And like he fell and she, she, she cut left, she and shook them. And then she cut right and caught the ball and ran it like 40 yards for a touchdown. Actually, she broke his angles, man.
Speaker: Well, I love watching women succeed. As a girl, dad, I love watching girls and women do a predominantly male sport and killing it. Like I'll be the biggest cheerleader all day long. Well, yeah, let's fucking go. you' You've heard of. Hey, Tony.
Speaker: No, I know my kid called. You've heard of God, what's her name? She was in ah she was in ah dragsters and all that. What is her name? RuPaul? No.
Speaker: Our dragsters are or or yeah, car dragsters. Oh, speaking of RuPaul. Sorry, Jarvis. I just want to say real quick. How the hell? does one ah ugly ass dude becomes such a, Oh, Hey, make them make them some music thing. Surely my down. be a thing Have you ever heard her? She was in a, she, she raced in the same thing as Don Garletts.
Speaker: Well, well, John forces daughters. They are John forces actually in fucking bad shape right now, because he had a major major fucking crash a week or two ago, but his what he's got one or two daughters, Brittany and Ashley. Yeah. Fucking awesome. Brittany does funny or one of them does funny cars and the other one's dragster. Yeah, they're both fucking. Yeah, phenomenal. ah Dennis Anderson has a daughter that does monster trucks now. Oh shit. No, no, for real. I'd be into that. She, uh, she's part of the grave, the grave bigger family. Yeah. Thank you. I was going to say, I know his son, obviously this ah he has four kids, I think three are boys. And then one's a girl.
Speaker: Tristan I think her name is. Tristan Anderson. shes Who was the chick that just died? Did the drag racing chick just died? I just saw this. ah oh um I think she was on that that um what's that street outlaws or whatever. Oh, she wasn't a dry. yeah Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you're talking about. like They street race. Yeah. um But Shirley Madone, she actually had her foot cut off. I foot her leg, maybe. And she was one of the first females to get in there. And they asked, they called them Big Daddy Don Garlets.
Speaker: They asked him, well, what do you think about Shirley Madone racing? And he's like, hey, at the end of the day, eventually women are going to be in more of these races. Well, I don't, I don't see the issue. issue And he was, he was actually the biggest cheerleader for her. I I'm like, what's that chick that does NASCAR? She fucking kills it, dude. She's awesome. Oh, um, uh, yeah. You know, as long as you can, I don't care who you are. If you can handle yourself on the track, I don't give a fuck. I don't care if you're, you're Dylan Mulvaney and you want to fucking race? Let's fucking line up. I'll race. I remember when, uh,
Speaker: and and pat i I remember when Danica Patrick, it was big news yeah that Danica was signed by Tony Stewart, Stewart House Racing. And when she faintd flamed out, everyone wanted to say, oh, well, it was because of her. It's like, no, it was because the machine wasn't behind her. Yeah. you know uh there are drivers out there that can out drive their car you had a woman in the 70s qualify for the indy 500 but the only reason them why she they wasn'ter they did a movie about her there was this chick in the 70s she did she was one of the first funny car drivers and county yeah and her her fucking blower exploded well not only that but uh i think her foot got cut off um
Speaker: but yeah We know and the because the engines were in the front. So we're trying to hit that the transmission that break your foot off and cut your foot. Well, the thing is, is like her, her, her. They they bought a new supercharger the night before the race or new blower. It was like a 720, which is fucking massive compared to what she had. And they put it on there, put it on the car, tested it out and it fucking blew up and blew the transmission, which cut her foot off. Yeah. Well, and back in those days, that was just like monster truck. Back in those days, you straddled the fucking transmission. Back in those days, even with monster trucks, you know, the first time Bigfoot ever rolled over, it smushed in the thing. And and when ah Bob Chandler seen it, he asked Jim Cramer, he's like, how are you doing? He's like, pretty good. And and Bob Chandler's like, I'll make sure this never happens because it could have killed him. Oh, yeah.
Speaker: And nowadays, seeing how monster trucks are, it's like... Well, the bodies and the bodies back then were actually the real body that you get from the shop. Nowadays, they're just all fiberglass. Well, and that's the thing. Like I had I had a kid come up to me one day and they're like, God, I can't believe this is what monster trucks is. I'm like, do you know about how monster trucks started? And they're like, no. And I'm like, that's the asshole in his backyard saying I can take my truck over to this car.
Speaker: That that is the sad thing about how kids are raised today. Like I knew about bigfoot and snake bite I knew about that big rivalry and later on Everyone found out snake bite was part of bigfoot's company. Oh, yeah Well, you know it came down to when bigfoot first came out They didn't have a rival and they didn't have a row so they built snake bite Well, no. Snakebite was 90s. Bigfoot had USA1, which was a Chevy. And they played off the Chevy. That was in the early 80s. Chevy versus Ford. And then Thunder Chicken was a bright yellow C10. And then he had beautiful yeah rolling thunder, which was a van at Monstra. But then they had didn't the eyes have that. they Didn't they have that?
Speaker: It was a, it was a band, but it was on Trent. Oh, you're talking about the, uh, yeah, you're talking about the little tank thing. Yeah, that thing was dope. Uh, Bigfoot tracks or tracks foot or something. They even had a miss Bigfoot at one time, which that would have been, that was a big deal back in the day. Yeah. But it's one of those things. It's like the evolution of anything. Yeah. what you have to. And that's when it comes to the evolution of stuff, kids nowadays, like, if you have kids tomorrow, they won't know a world without the internet. Yeah. Where I grew up.
Speaker: We didn't have the internet. We didn't have that to actually go to a monster truck show to know. Yeah, exactly. Well, we're seeing on TV and you see the commercial port for the videotapes you like. And it's so cool now that YouTube you can watch a free monster jam show on you. Yeah. like Well, one of the things one of the things I love to watch on on YouTube is ah Louisiana Mudfest. it's stupid i like just send me the like that after this oh it's literally just a bunch of guys and a fucking mud pit so it's kind of like it's kind of like dirty mutter fudters or what or whatever was and then they do the the truck tug of wars and shit like that and Like never seen that person, but I'd be in. Well, like I get a kick out of it. So one time someone put a thing back in the old USHRA one monster trucks used to do the tractor pulls and all that shit. And they're like, Oh yeah, this is bullshit. And I'm like, it wasn't a big deal back then as it is today.
Speaker: But like I've always said, the day Bob Chandler dies, his son -in -law now owns Bigfoot. but But because Bob is still alive, he has the Santa. As soon as Bob dies, you watch Bigfoot will be in Monster Jam. Oh, yeah. Here. And it should be. I would love to see you. OK. I would love to see, but I never, I never got to see Bigfoot race. My brother did because he was born in the late 80s, but he would always have to be Snakebite and I always had to be Bigfoot because my brother was such a dick. No, but at the end of the day, like when you see a monster truck in person, I don't care who you are. I don't care if you're six or sixty. You're just like, that's cool. I want one.
Speaker: and like like and but We've all seen the original Roadhouse motherfucker was driving a monster truck around town. I'm not that was Bigfoot Yeah, that was actually Bigfoot without the logos. Yep and mark. I think it was mark Asked he's like was that Bigfoot I'm like, yeah, he's like why they didn't have the logos I'm like cuz I couldn't they well you gotta get the license and back then Bigfoot was big and But yeah you got to think about it. It's like if you're going to build a monster truck, which Brad Wesley actually did, you just grab a truck. You don't worry about fucking logos because, you know, if anything, you would put Brad Wesley on the side. But it's it's one of the things is like they're just cool. And then you had USA won in Bigfoot and take this job and shove it. Yeah.
Speaker: You had a body of Bigfoot without the whole shell in tango and cash. Oh, that's right. Yep. The one that chase out about them. And then in Ace Ventura, that was actually a Bigfoot built monster truck. No, it wasn't. Yeah, it wasn't. No, it was a Chevy S10. Yeah, but Bigfoot helped build it. Oh the, okay. The big book company. Yeah, the big book company. Because I looked at it and I was like, that's a weird body choice. The S 10 body is not, which was which, if I was a movie guy back in that day, hell yeah. I'm calling Bob Chandler and being like, I know what you're going to build. If you're going to build a monster drug for movie, you go to the King. Well,
Speaker: And a lot of people - Like you don't call me, you don't call me to do a fucking Fast and Furious car. And a lot of people don't know this, but Bob Chandler and Bigfoot were the first ones to ever have make an electric monster truck too. yeah it's such a noisyasss fucking truck down great buddy that's doing Yeah, it was such a like when they showed it it's such a noisy ass truck It's like go with the regular motor. Well, it's like you see these kids and parents nowadays They go to monster jam and they got the fucking earbuds and all that shit. I'm just sitting there. um'm I'm Bad to the bone. Bad to the bone comes on and I'm just fucking singing to it. We didn't have that shit in the 80s. In the 80s, if it was too loud, you did this. You went home. Yeah. That's like ah ah me and my wife's first ever date. Your dad goes, here, cover this with cover cover your ears with my beer cans. you know Yeah. The first ever time like I actually went on a date with a girl,
Speaker: We went to a monster or not monster truck, but a tractor pull well some jack as yeah a Little bit too much to drink fucking his buddy kind of nudged him a little bit spilt the beer all over me and the first thing I did was because I have fight -or -flight instinct I kind of just pushed him back and the guy spilt the rest of his beer on this other chick I'm the dude that kind of nudged him's girlfriend and the guy's like you're lucky or a kid or else I'd beat your ass I'm like You're lucky your buddies are too drunk or else fucking I would have beat your ass
Speaker: Because it's like, it's nothing worse than being like a 10 year old and you got that fucking smell of beer. Granted, the guy. like That was in that back of the day in the 80s when you were when you were 10 years old covered in beer. Yeah, you're you are King Dick. It was a. but Why do you smell like beer, you know? But the guy, the guy who accidentally split this beer on me, he was apologetic. He was like, dude, ah do you go on? Do you go on rides or do you want a T -shirt? I'm like, no, don't worry about it. Just don't do it again. Yeah. but did the the end of the day And the guy was my dad the guy went to my dad and he's and my dad's just like, yeah, your boyfriend up there is lucky he didn't do it to my older son. My older son would have kicked his ass. And that was back. My brother was doing all the fucking had to be a big shot, doing all the fucking MMA training shit. I'm like, oh, what's Keith going to do? Wax on, wax off.
Speaker: yeah like i did martial arts trade i did some taek kwondo as a kid but i got something you can wax on wax off yeah you can that's japanese dady
Speaker: I did that. I got on the fucking network. I don't need to do it anymore. ah You talk about that. There's going to be people that like all wear a nonsense called nonsense or network hat on. They're going to be like, oh, so you think you're all shit? And I'm like, I'm done, little boy. Speaking of tractor pulls, have you ever seen how they do it in Germany? No, and boys don't fuck around they throw four jet engines on the front of a homemade track dude You want to fucking talk about find out fuck around find out some of the some of these country boys around here Like the little fucking lawn tractors. They'll put a fucking jet motor on that bitch. No, no, uh There's there was a guy Like less than a mile down the road. He had a truck full truck
Speaker: And that motherfucker would start it up. You'd sound like you're standing next to it, but let me find this picture. yeah You're going to see yourself. But no, like I remember when we used to go mud and mud and all that. and Took a girl on a date one time in my uncle's fucking Bronco. And I'm like, you want to go mudding? And she's like, sure. Because she never went mudding before. And I was taking her through like fucking areas that you think we wouldn't have fucking made it to and ah through. And I'm just driving it. And she's like, how the hell are you doing so well at this? I'm like, watched a lot of monster trucks in my time.
Speaker: and I used to have so much fun doing that shit. Alyssa, we gotta go mud in one of these days. I just gotta build a mud truck again. ah Seriously, I'm gonna show this. And I already turned the sound off so we can actually talk over it. I mean, we kind of did do some mudin' during this talk. That's a B16, sir. Oh, fuck. I see that shit fucking at some of these fairgrounds. Just people with money. Oh, look at this. Ah, stupid ad!
Speaker: fuck you youtube turn on the sound be a man haha dude i love tractor pulls that's dope as fuck demolition derbies tractor pulls any shit like that i don't give a fuck call me a fucking dirty redneck all you want i love trying to find the there's one Look at these. There's a guy on here. And my favorite. If you look for a wife, I attract a pole. He is 6 ,000 horsepower. Not that one. I like them little swamp rats that they got. and Jeeves, it might be overkill, but you know what? It makes us proud. I love this. What the fuck is that? All the motors in the back.
Speaker: It's a fiberglass body. Oh, my god, dude. Like thatt that swamp. Oh, that's one brand new. You don't know how to change subject without me, James. That's swamp. That's one brand new that I sent you. jeff if I'm not here. know Kiss my ass. Yeah, you know mister. I'm the host of all this and it's more that where you disappear an hour Yeah so so Sometimes I like to just sit back and observe and watch the world burn. Yeah. Yeah that all right you know All both of you guys are quote -unquote host of shows I ain't Know most of a show. I don't know what you're talking about
Speaker: I used to be until, you know, people were like, Oh, you do shows on Sundays. You suck. Nobody ever said that. Yeah. So there's a prime spot, man. I don't I hated it. You, you, you guys, you guys can say what you want to say about Sunday. If it wasn't for the fact that Sunday is my day that I take to myself, I would be fist fighting somebody that be on Sunday. so well like ah yeah is so america tonight Nobody's doing anything dude. You know, I do I do two of our most popular shows on the network on two of the Worst days that you can do shows on and that's Friday and Saturday night Friday and Saturday nights
Speaker: No, I don't know. money but on show My at the bar. Well, nobody's home. Nobody's around, man. Sunday is if it wasn't for the fact that Sunday is the one day of the week that I try to do anything podcast, social media related or or talk to anybody. I don't talk to any of you guys. Don't take it personal. I don't even fucking talk to Jeff on Sundays. Well, I don't you know. like Glick don't really talk to me in anyway in my season. No, in all seriousness, Sunday I... I damn heard my phone call. Every time you message me, I always respond unlike some people in this conversation. jarroish and
Speaker: one time sorry twice last week twice last week i messaged you sorry yeah you know i was in the blue on red unacceptable uh -huh well dude people can mess with me on audience facebook you know who don't leave me on red jerevee she brian brian never leaves me on red yeah but fucking brian and brian has no life it it is it is the day i love brian look at that three jet engines Jesus Christ. Sunday is the day of our Lord and savior, Glick. Glick is Christ. Glick is Christ. I'm going to fucking hell for that one. Dear Lord, I apologize. up Yeah, it didn't last long.
Speaker: It is my day, but if it wasn't, you don't think I'd put clicks out some music on a fucking Sunday in an hour? Then do it. Like I even told when I was talking with Mark today. you Do anything on Sundays. Because, oh, well, okay there, fucking Walter. Calm down. see you know no longer sunday or i starva i told that thomas one day of the week when i came back to ohio that i said I'm going to unplug and reset. I agree and and I kind of adopted it as well.
Speaker: it's one of those things that's like jesus you think That's a lot of power that's nothing there's people out there that Six thousand works power. Yeah, that's baby shit compared to some of these people to it sure the biggest but It's the week and it's still shade on anybody else because we're all doing good stuff But two of the biggest shows of the week are on Friday and Saturday which should not be because A, I do a music show. i mean Honestly though, ah honestly though that is that's not a stretch. It shouldn't be though, because Friday nights I host musicians. I interview musicians since the biggest night of the week for them, Fridays and Saturday nights. Yeah, they're busy.
Speaker: They're busy Saturday nights. Everybody's at the bar hanging out, getting fucking everybody, but us because I don't believe the house. Yeah, I don't go to a bar either. But I mean, all the time, you know, was when we would go to PA, we got to the, but now I, you know, yeah, now I don't, I don't, I don't go to bars around here. Well, if I do the bars around here, I'm not drinking because I'm driving. So I'm like, I'm sipping on Pepsi or water, you know, and i used to live when I used to live in Lindstrom.
Speaker: I used to go to the bar and then after a while it's like you look at the people there and it's like, Hey, can you buy me a drink? I knew you're dead. I knew your grandpa and it's just like, it's the same i don't do that people. It's the same fucking people in my, like my mom used to ask me when she used to live in Lindstrom or and yeah. And she'd be like, you want to go to the bar? And I'm like, mom, it's the same fucking people. It's the same people that could have. That is the one thing I never have to worry about. Could have fucking been. And they'll sit there and they'll talk about their fucking tears and their beers. And they'll sit there about. Well, I remember when we used when we used to play it back in the 70s and it's like my dad after a while, he laughs at people like that now because he don't drink anymore. And it's just like, well, that's that's the problem with small town bars.
Speaker: I fucking hate it. And then of course people are like, they'll call my mom and they'll be like, Hey, your son's here. It's like, I'm fucking 31 years old. um a What? My mom's gonna fucking banish me to my fucking room. Like I used to drink with my mom and dad at the same fucking bar, like grow up. No, that's the other thing. That's the that's the other problem with that. And then you get the same bar. ta
Speaker: I mean, I need to learn how to dance because evidently my wife's like, dude, I can't get it.
Speaker: It's like a statue dancing. I'm like, really? Bud Grant doesn't know how to dance. well's because but Much like everything in your life, man, you worry too much. You stress over it. You overthink it. and No, it's just, there was the certain people that were dancers. And then there's the certain people that actually had to do shit. and i and he's just gonna blink it out oh Oh my God. You're talking about new stuff. You're at a bar. You know what click just just just just fucking blank all that book Don't you can know what you know what click all you fucking one Jarvis? Because I've done lived through all this shit. I everything you're going through right now, you know what What it has such an easy fucking concept that that's what pisses me off with these people nowadays they think mental health is so fucking easy to just get over if it was and
Speaker: Half the fucking people in the fucking room wouldn't be fucking spending millions of fucking dollars. I'm glad that there are people out there that have gotten over it. Sorry that my life isn't fucking in order. Sorry, dude, don't preach to the choir. I've never gotten over one. I think I'm sorry ah to all the people out there that want to fucking send messages to me saying Jarvis, you don't know how good you got it. Fuck them. You really think I'm over my bullshit? You really think I'm over all my dumb shit? No, what I do, what I do is I fucking do like every other fucking person does. Well, not what I probably drink. No, no, I know I'm drinking fucking skittle flavored water right now. And that's another thing with people. They run from their problems by going to a fucking bar, getting blitzed out of their mind. I've never gone to a bar. I used to run for my problems. I used to look for this. I used to look for.
Speaker: The the the easy way. The easy way. and Yeah, I used to look for the cure at the bottom of a bottle. I really did. I was that guy 100 percent. I've never been that guy. I just I was I was that guy all day, every day. Now, Jeff, just the answer the answers to all my problems are at the at the bottom of this bottle. I was 100 percent that fucking guy. I'm drinking fucking watermelon Skittle flavor. Water tonight. I've been drinking it all goddamn night.
Speaker: But the problem is, and this is the thing, this is, this is what I had to get over in my head. I had to, and and I'm not, I'm not burying it. I'm not hiding it. I'm not just, you know, keeping it quiet or anything like that. I just had to stop overthinking so much, man. You you worry too much. People worry too much about things that they don't have to worry about. And they're not like, they don't allow themselves to have fun. That's what I told you. With my dancing shit, it has nothing to do with the over - I'm saying Jarvis Jarvis. I'm coming back around to it because I feel like yeah you're lumping me into a situation. You're a great podcast host, Jarvis. You do. Yeah, but at the same time, I do. Some of your best shows some of your best shows and and whether you think you can do it or not, some of your best shows are when you stop thinking and just do.
Speaker: and yeah i get that ah but at the same time want you your Sports man and and that will happen just everyone needs to get off my ass about it I'll be over on your ass. I'm gonna be on your ass and in your it's like let be let away let's get this shit going and if other people want to join the network and do a show on Sunday, but I'll fucking means do it um Dude like even doing two shows now do one show just do mondays man it's oh that's what i'm and we'll talk about it just i told i i get that glick i get that i into um'm will we'll talk more about it later so but no like do and with dancing it's just There was kids in my. No, dude, I can't. Every fuck every every homecoming and all that shit. It's like, hey, Jarvis, you're going to go to the dance. My parents literally had to pay me pay me to go to a school dance because I didn't care. I didn't want to do it to dance when you go to a school dance, right?
Speaker: And fucking so my parents would at want me to fucking go to these dances and dance. You know what I was doing? I was eating the free fucking pizza and then going in the other gym and playing dodgeball. You know how many times I not that high school has anything to do with anything right now because we're all grown as fuck. We're all grown as fuck. I'm just going to write and choose. Just groove to the beat, man. Just groove to the beat. It's all in the hips. It's all in the hips. Like my wife, when we were at our wedding, I was just like, dude, I was worried about my knees. I was too. But after a while, just worrying about it. Don't worry about it, man.
Speaker: did you know i get this I get this weird thing like everybody's watching me. Even though I know i know I'm not the most important in the person in this room. I just sit there and I'm like, no, people are going to see me look like an ass. You know how many times that it's just in the last year and a half that Nikki and I have been together that I've gotten yelled at the night after or the day after. Her knees hurt because I've drove her out on the dance floor to dance with me. and I'm like, yeah, your knees hurt, but did you have fun? Yeah, but here's the thing. Most of my need problems are because of sports and stupid decisions. But at the same time, and during my wedding, I'm the only motherfucker that doesn't have problems physically.
Speaker: so you guys your neat Your ankle your fucking dick you got got your knees I broke my ankle two years in a row on the same day. I I folded my fucking fucking destroyed my back is fucking destroyed but that what what what else are you i mean what else what else what else do you want jarvis my body's right does that stop me from dancing and having fun nope I'm not saying it stops me. It's just I'm not one of those people that's going to **** I don't always. well Well, let me ask you that Steven. When you get out, if you do go out and dance, do you feel like everybody's watching you? Sometimes but yeah, that's why I don't go out there for my wedding. I just got to the point where put dogeva back
Speaker: Sorry. Yeah, I call bullshit on that. but No way to dodge ball back for the violent the violent part. Yeah, I will call bullshit on that. But hey, Jeremy again. What? I have to tell you something. Oh, Nicki and I get married and we have our big party um every and I don't give a shit. it's it's It's part of the rules. In order for you to come, you have to dance. um You have to shake that sweet pasty white ginger ass. I'm not that fucking pasty white, you could fucking die. You better shake that ginger white ass. You're one step down from leggy white, too. During my wedding, the only thing that I was stressed about was that one of my in -laws couldn't keep her fucking bullshit out of the fucking wedding. That's the only thing that I was worried about. That's every wedding. like if i If I was going to Glick's wedding, I would be the one objecting and screaming, he's mine.
Speaker: But at the same time... Because it was funny! Because it would be funny! Me and my wife... You can't... I'm pregnant! Dude, Jeff, Jeff, if you show up there with like a fucking with the fake pregnant belly, she is mine. I'm not giving him to you. I do it. I'll fucking give you what I want. What I want. What I would want Jeff to do is like, because we're a lopin, so it'll just be her and I at the actual wedding. But we're having a big reception party. You know, what I would want was like when everybody's doing toast is if Jeff was there. come to stand up to do a toast and walk up to me and grab me by my hand and go, nobody puts click in the corner. Yes. But no, like. Yeah, that's right. My mom. And then just mean mug. And then just mean mug Nikki. Do it. Do it. You know what, since Jeff ain't going to be there. You know what? I would be the whole thing I would be afraid of is Nikki punching me in the fucking mouth.
Speaker: you ride my way shout out It was funny um it's not that Jeff is afraid to come to the States. He's not welcome in the States. We all talk about this. yeah you know if afford Walk up, grab my hand and be like nobody puts click and niy just punches them in the mouth before you but but nikey Mickey just punches punches him in the throat. she's gonna fucking shoot me kill shot bam but but let's be honest if i was going to the ceremony does anyone want to object me motherfucker he's mine so so ah my mom thinky both and gonna eat
Speaker: yeah my My mom was like the most nervous person. She's like, what song do you want to dance to for the son mom dance? And I'm just like, honestly, I don't care. And she's like, why don't we dance to Celine Dion's God Because You Loved Me. I'm like, mom, you do know what that song is about, right? yeah And she's like, no. And I'm like, it's about an affair that Celine Dion had with her manager husband who is like fucking old. That's like dancing to afternoon delight. And so i I told my mom, I'm like, listen to this song. And it was, uh, you'll be in my heart. The Tarzan's on. And Phil Collins. Jarvis and his mom danced a twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk that ass. Twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk, twerk,
Speaker: and tw the the song no i walk would The song I down to was Keith Whitley's When You Say Nothing At All. Trevor's dance to his mom to Ginny Wine's pony and he pulled this good piece from Magic Wine. but He rips off his fucking tear -away pants, and he's got knee pads on. just ready Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm requesting that song at your wedding now.
Speaker: You'll be on the dance floor right now, Blake. We're dancing tonight, motherfucker. Hello, Alyssa. Poor jars. Keith Whitley's When You Say Nothing at All. That's a beautiful song. However, we're having fun terrorizing your husband. Typical.
Speaker: Hey, you got to do me a favor. Tell that motherfucker to call me sometimes. Jesus Christ. Stop calling asshole. Stop calling this asshole. I wish I could remember the lyrics. I wish I could remember the lyrics to Pony. She's saying this. I don't know. She don't phone it. My pony.
Speaker: bray
Speaker: um ne service my carload and i saw the bathroom By the way, there you go, buddy, I got you I had to go to the bathroom. So I'm sorry about that. and I'm just like here Alyssa jeff I Know the I know the fucking gentlemen yeah ladies and gentlemen Welcome, Jeremy, she and his mom to the floor for a mother's son dance. and um This is the bachelor. Calm down, pile Someone who knows how to ride. Glicks like the guy from fucking old dogs at the fucking county fair. Without ever fouling out.
Speaker: on this quiet ah boy This is a weird mother -son dance at a wedding. Somebody record this shit. Am I tripping out mushrooms or is this really happening? The place and so they're going, fucking mushrooms are kicking in. That's OK, Jarvis. That's OK, Jarvis. we were we was We was watching Family Feud the last time we were at out in PA. And I love that show. Steve Harvey is the national treasure. and And the question was,
Speaker: The question the question was things you turn on at a family dinner. it and i still actually And as soon as he said as soon as he said it without hesitation, I'm sitting on the count 100%. So this can be your mother in law. um Yeah. Clicks like, Vic just goes, your mother -in -law. And Nikki's like, mom, did you hear him? Her dad told her, they're dying laughing. good saw Her mom was in the other room. Her mom was in the other room. And she was like, mom, did you hear that? She's like, what? And she she told her, she was like, Steve Harvey. The question was things to turn on at her family dinner. And she was like, yeah. And she's like, and Chris said, your mother -in -law. And she said, oh, no.
Speaker: get to she's like Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. but He didn't go there. yeah but The other for the other were like the sweet Virgin Mary. Oh, no. I'll say a prayer for him. So when we went to the monster truck, don't do that. After we got done with monster jam. We're waiting in the parking garage. And so I'm like, Oh, you banged your mother -in We didn't Fucking I'm cranking that bitch. It was red solo cup by Toby. I think Toby Keith had passed away by then or maybe he's still alive. He's still alive. Yeah. And when the fucking when the vehicles started moving, I crank that fucker up so loud that there's people just dancing to the song and I'm just everyone's honking. I'm done.
Speaker: yeah
Speaker: i fuck out stephen like
Speaker: options so Everyone wonders why I fucking come up here on a Saturday. It's cuz Glick knows he can't handle a show by himself That's why he has Jeff and me come up here cuz we're the content first step You know what I'm so good I don't even have to justify that
Speaker: Yeah. OK, rooster. I wonder why the fuck I subject myself. ah wonder I wonder why you're the subject of yourself to this, too. What you eating, man? Since you already pulled the e break, what you eating?
Speaker: appreciate that What are you eating, dude? Seriously, what are you eating, Tony? d saying vihi fish what is it fish oh i thought you said i thought you said this and i was like yeah i can see what it is but you're not tell me what it is his up at you know what fuck this network and fuck these shows that's all i gotta to say boys
Speaker: I actually hit the wrong button. I'm sure you did. I'm sure you did. You got a mom filet you're eating there? Not Steve, though, right? What kind of fish are you eating? Good fish? Bad fish? One fish, two fish? Red fish, blue fish? Frozen fish? Not real fish? Yeah, it's like cod. Is it salmon? What? and It's a cod. It's a cod.
Speaker: cockfish It's It's cod. You said it's cod. What is that? What does this mean, Jeremy? OK, it's the fish you buy in the frozen fish aisle. Yeah, it's the frozen fish aisle. Say it's cod. That's fucking goddamn. Yeah, it's breaded there. Is it good? Is it good? I'd rather go out fishing and catch my own fish but oh my god she made him dinner she cooked him fish yeah dude what the fuck he said man it's a dick move dick move but oh my god is it fulfilling your woman some appreciation my wife decided to cook food for the second time in our whole relationship oh my god let's roll out the fucking red carpet well that's too much more than Jeff's life has ever cooked so
Speaker: sorry sorry john that was um easy just question ti here too
Speaker: you such an ass I should have mentioned it. She sent me a message. What are you doing? So I sent her the link and I was like, I'm on the show. And she pops up just as you fucking trash. I'm sorry, Todd. It was a joke. It was a joke. It was a joke. No. Sorry, sorry, Johnny. display you No, she does cook all the time. I get it. I have no idea. I'm just joking. I'm kidding. um No, but but Steven, you should even though it's even though it's I can't make that joke because Nicki every night is all the fucking time, dude. I I appreciate my wife cooking. It's just she bakes. I cook could make me a sandwich. Come here. Exactly. I'm still waiting on my sandwich from Nick, Nicki. So you're saying Nicki about your wife.
Speaker: Nicki owes me a sandwich for like a year Jeff is never getting a fucking sandwich and fuck you Jeff. That's from Nicki from the back up Love you Nicki. Love you Nicki. Happy birthday to her and the only person that fought a oh oh oh shit oh Speaking birthdays, obviously happy birthday Nicki. Happy birthday Cameron What did she say? Yeah, I meant to do this early in the show. Happy birthday to Cam, but fuck Cam because he wasn't here. So fuck him. It's not here. your bur in the link You do. You're Mexican. The least you should be able to do is cook Mexican food. Yeah, that's kind of an easy one. No, but she can cook. I make delicious cheeseburgers and hot dogs.
Speaker: Well, yeah, you're fat. That's not it. Yeah, you're fat American. That's not that. That's not it. You should be able to. make Yeah, there it is. No hard shell tacos for you. I told her the story about the hard shell taco thing. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. Exactly. But in your defense, when I first got here, I was like, where's the fucking hard shell tacos? I didn't know that. I thought that was a thing. I really just put my hair like. Yeah, you did. It was like right on my neck and it was yeah, sweet. Yeah, there's your big Starbucks Starbucks. There's your Fabio moment for all you ladies out there.
Speaker: it's it's It's getting so long. dude like It's been so long that if you do that, you look and sing ah the fucking when a man loves a woman, I will call you Michael fucking Bolton. Why would he sing Michael? When a man loves a woman. Wow. Why do you have to put so much evidence on some woman? all suggest Wait, wait, wait. Four minutes. but
Speaker: check word three check just There's a band. And I played their music on here. I'm trying my goddamn, this, this is my outside of blacktop mojo. This is my next ultimate get right now. There's there a band called the nicotine dolls. And I've been, man and I've been talking to them since they were nothing. And then all of a sudden they went on America's Got Talent. Now they're all of a sudden. Now they're like, Oh, we don't want to talk to that. But the dude does a version of that song when a man like and loves a woman.
Speaker: But goddamn, every time this cat sings. Why don't you just change your name? No, I shouldn't have to change my name because I'm not an alan ass clown. I like these strains. Yeah, dude. Hold on a second. You guys are way faster than I am at it. What's his name again? Do a screen share of nicotine dolls on YouTube. the dude like i i love his voice don't treat me bad you don't have to look up that necessarily that song just look up the nicotine dolls uh you want to piss off my dad play michael bolton's version of that song just saying and ah but click my windows i don't i don't even know what i'm doing if i heard the song if i heard this part i just can't sing without it i can't sing
Speaker: That's why I host a fucking podcast because I can't sing or play an instrument. He can't host a podcast either to save his life. That's why he has us.
Speaker: I was trying not to laugh at you je i know and that's la you Jarvis. I know my role. ah Fuck you Jarvis. That was good by the way. I love you Jarvis. I'll see you at home but fuck you Jarvis. I'll see you at home, have my dinner ready, you dirty bitch, but fuck you.
Speaker: and like get without you assholes I do it every Friday night. yeah Okay, one night out of the week, he does one show by himself. I'll do every goddamn show without you guys. Oh, motherfucker, please. no Motherfucker, please. Listen here. You think I need a Canadian fucking ginger? I have a goddamn garden gnome to hose the fire. I love fucking... Got me fucked up.
Speaker: but yeah ah We ain't played that in a hot minute. oh Yeah, we haven't played that song in so long. And it's just like every time I used to come on this show, it's like... yeah it's like on You fucking piece of dick. Jeff, you son of a bitch.
Speaker: what the chickening that mean
Speaker: my deck and eat my ass allle you sons of bitches but but what baby Yeah, turn it turn your volume up Jeff yeah, turn it up come on
Speaker: I love these guys, but man, it looks like a woman in my car
Speaker: It sounds painful but and it looks painful when he sings but I can't believe it sounds like me when I try to sing.
Speaker: Go back real quick. Are you on that page on YouTube Jeff? thousand was your still this something sp Why does this have like Why does it have like a beat of Africa by Toto that's when you close that's an 80s song Yeah, I get that, but it still has the fucking beat to it. Go to the go to their go to their shorts. You got to see this guy when he sings, so you got to see his face. There you go. Just click on that first that that second one right there. Second one. Somebody reminded me this song classic 90s. I know what you do. Yeah.
Speaker: I know why you say you love me. I know what you do. I don't think it's fair.
Speaker: I know why it's all mine. I know why you say you're mine. I know what you do. I love, I love, I love this guy. I love, I love their music. Sorry, I was trying to avoid X's. I love this guy. I think the band is awesome. I love his voice. It's so unique and it's so different. I've been, he's likekin sings hu like like a year and a half. I've been trying to get them on the show.
Speaker: He's good. I'm not mad at it. He does. ah He does a version of When a Man Loves a Woman. And Jeff, if you want to find it, and we can play a snippet of it. Yeah. It's on their TikTok page. Is it OK? Dude, yeah, he's got really good range. They remix. Yeah, they remix the songs. They change them up. They make them their own. Actually, we might be able to get away with it. Yeah, you should be. Because he switched it up, right? Yeah. It's just ah the beat of that song when he was getting into the first one you played. It sounded so much like Africa. That's how that song goes.
Speaker: yeah
Speaker: I mean, that's an actual song from the 80s. Yeah, I don't know. I know Toto. and Trust me, I know. Had parents that were one was born in the 60s and one was born in the 50s.
Speaker: palmy Right back to you guys. Well, talk about you something. Oh, of course. Now fucking S .A .T taker has to take the S .A .T's.
Speaker: No, it's mostly. Stop. Have to pee. Stop getting old. Stop. Peas smells like asparagus. Stop. Even though I've never had asparagus. Stop.
Speaker: Oh. So everyone knows everyone's night going. Jeff's going to pull up a song from the 90s or remake of the song from the night. No, I got the clip. I'm downloading it now. OK, he's downloading it, everyone. He's down. Yeah, it it takes a minute. I got to switch. I got to send it to my fucking computer. But no, it's it's not bad, dude. He fucking hits the boat. OK. Please don't treat me bad.
Speaker: takes a minute No, he hit this the note, sir. Let me tell you. Oh, anyone that could sing that song really good. I love that song. and And the other one is like ah this is a man's world. That's a hard note to hit too. per Percy Sledge, though, was the best version of When a Man Loves a Woman. Fuck Michael Bolton.
Speaker: No, I'm not mad at this. That's like where Dummy go. He had to take the SATs. ah
Speaker: For Glick. I don't have with us, but Glick deserves it so much.
Speaker: oh No, like back I got to set up. Did you ever watch the clip of American Idol where that dude was literally singing? Let's get it on to his parents. Really? Yeah. He's like, this is to my parents. And then he's just like, one, two, three, let's get it on. It's like, oh, my fucking and like even his parents were like, what the fuck? and Simon calls just like I'm gonna stop you here yeah that's that's that's cringe -worthy let me tell you so I don't watch that shit anymore like and my i you know what you know what I you know what I like I like going on to YouTube and watching like the the golden buzzer shit
Speaker: Oh, America's Got Talent. Yeah, well, you know, somebody that can really belt it out. I watched this chick the other day. She was singing that song. I see red red. Oh, yeah. And I guess a couple of years old. But damn, that bitch belted it out. And I was like, you know what? I'll let her sing to me any day. Well, like, I loved when they had the show, Don't Forget the Lyrics with Wayne Brady hosted it. Yeah. And like they would even talk about somebody can sing. They would even have Eddie Money show up. They had Eddie Money. I think. Well, I got that clip. I got that clip. I'm saving it till you get here. Let's go. So so I got the clip of this dude singing Man Love a Woman. Here you go. Day one of singing Michael Bolton until Michael Bolton duets it.
Speaker: When a man knows a woman can't keep his mind on nothing else He'd trade the world for the good thing he's found When a man knows a woman or a way I'll give you Everything I've got I would try to hold on to your precious love Baby, baby, please don't treat me bad When a man loves a woman
Speaker: with Michael Bolton. Not mad at it. I agree with Michael Bolton, that no talent ass club. Like I said, though, like I said, you look at his face, man, and you hear that voice. He always looks like he's ready to sneeze. He's ready to sneeze. He's got to, though. But the best singer of that song, though, is Percy. No, what was that? What was that fucking movie? There was a movie with Chris Pine in it. Chris Pine? The guy from American Pie. And people made fun of him because his facial expressions is what he sang. And, but when you, when you're, well, if you're belting something out, if you're not making facial expressions, you're a fucking alien. Which version, uh, Jeeves, uh, Roy Orbison's or Van Halen's? Which one? or Roy Orbison. Uh, no, they, do know what they might have? Mama said I shouldn't get a Roy Orbison tattooed, but. You know what? our own orderer
Speaker: Yeah, these these guys have no affiliation with this show. i I have yet to have them on. I want to have him on so fucking bad. And it's something that I've legitimately been working on for a year and a half, probably close to two years. um But they blew up when they went on. America's got talent, man. I saw that. I love this boy. Stay humble. I love the way he sings. I'm a huge fan of the nicotine dolls. um but i said do but like i said that a lot of times when he's doing songs man it looks like it looks painful well see what here's the thing though when you are singing that song when you are singing when a man loves a woman you have to fucking convey it you gotta you you gotta it's like just going what's that fucking like
Speaker: when a man yeah Yeah. You can't do Whitney Houston's... I know, do it again. No. Hold on, let me write down the time. ah I'll Always Love You by Whitney Houston. No. I watch the body. But see, I can't shit on Whitney Houston right now for that song. oh no but but if anybody if anybody belts that shit out you and and does it with a straight pace or no expression you automatically go yeah that's fake yeah
Speaker: Well, I mean, ah you know, and and a lot of people didn't know this, but I'm sure we do. Whitney Houston wasn't the sort of person that originated that song. It was Dolly Parton. and she was singing She was singing that song because of her and ah Kenny Rogers' is alleged affair. Well, it was definitely not alleged. No, it was kind of lately islands in the streams. Just saying people he was islands in fucking the hell out of them plastic jubbly -wubbly I don't think the plastic got no one to hold over and you got no one no more fucking if he shit a but flip it Dolly we love you. We love you
Speaker: part that I love Kenny Rogers. And yeah I'm just saying, I'm just saying. Hey, hey. Kenny looks like Ken right now. He looks like Kendall. Kenny's dead. Use your head voice. but No, he did. He did a he did a a song with a band called. What's your head voice sound like, Jeeves? o
Speaker: Is that your head voice? I know just head voices. It goes a little something like this. la Sounds like Pac -Man. yeah ah well ah walk You know of one song that I really like to Kenny Rogers that fits so well in a movie? The fucking Big Lebowski when they do just dropped in to see what condition my condition is in. When he's fucking doing the movie scene and he's just standing there. What's the song? Sing it for us. Fuck you. How's it going, Steven? We don't know. Are you trying to kill our ears, Glick?
Speaker: wow she just called ah fucke fired ah She just called you out buddy ah bet jarvis has to I bet Jarvis has the voice of an angel I've been called the songbird of my generation we've We've heard Jeff sing on this song. our song i've done I've done a song on you. I love in Step Brothers where he's singing for him and fucking John C. Riley's characters. fucks my dear that He sings Dolls of a Doll. What's up? What's up? What's up? I got a clip of Steven singing. Let's face it of the two Jarvis's here.
Speaker: Oh, OK. Here we go. Here. Oh. You know what? Throw your, put your money where your mouth is, Alyssa. Nope. Nope. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. I got, I got a, I got a version of Stephen, Stephen Singin. All right. I gotta hear this. It's true. Yeah. Yeah. Stephen, I got, I got a video of Stephen Singin. Fuck. Ooh, baby, do you know that's like? Fuck. Ooh, heaven is the place on earth.
Speaker: I swear we're gonna get rid of those. No! It's so fucking horrible. You can hop to it on it, dude. Yeah, go for it. I've sung on here. We did an entire karaoke night! Hey! We need to do another karaoke night. If George Clooney can sing... Apparently my karaoke. Well, first and foremost, Jeff, you fucking cheated. and then I did not cheat. Steven, you're deciding factor. He sang tequila. I sang tequila. And then I rapped. Technically a song. Technically a song. I rapped. I did an Elvis song too. I did an Elvis song. I did like four songs. Yes, I did. I rapped. I rapped and I got in trouble.
Speaker: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Next Saturday, karaoke night? I'm up for it. All of a sudden, you're down? Because, you know. stop like a few dare see When the sun goes down. Yeah, that was the worst thing about that night. We are all proud of ourselves. Connor fucking pulls out his goddamn guitar, and we're like, well, fuck. Dude, I would have been there. I would listen to Connor sing like, dude, that guy. Dude, that, he's, his, his fucking TikTok. Yeah, I rap, I rap. Okay, okay. I sang, I sang like three songs. You know what, you know what, Glick? I got a fucking, I did too. I sang that Elvis song that you didn't realize was Elvis. What, what's your rap song, Jeremy? Houdini. Go ahead.
Speaker: like I rapped, I rapped, I rapped on the show. You did, you did. You did a rap song, that's what I'm saying. Next Saturday, Rap Houdini. That's the sound of the police. good well
Speaker: the the know you Jeff, when you say tequila, were you drinking tequila too? No, no drink. No, you just sat there like a fucking bubble. It was funny anyway. I was the first one to go and I started out with tequila and we all knew what you were going to do, but it was worth it. Oh, I did it too, dude. I rock every time I hear the song tequila. It's either the Sandlot or the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. It's always Peewee Herman for me. Oh, that too. it's It's like a go -to. I see that. I i hear it. I'm like, ha ha, Peewee. No. and a andana Where? i Tequila. and I don't even remember what episode it was we did that, but like we did it. It was labeled karaoke. you Was it?
Speaker: yeah no i'm just saying this clip great and that's the shitty thing about it and that's the shitty thing about it was the two biggest voices wanted to yap their fucking yappers off about doing a karaoke show wouldn't even do anything jumped into kela and tony d who actually has a really good fucking voice he rapped believe it or not tony d actually no no no tony has got a Really? Tony's got a voice, man. Tony can sing. carry out and Just wouldn't fucking do shit. I sang more than they sang. Okay, so anyone that comes next Saturday? hopers man That was the pipe, that was the night that Nicky was giving me gummy. next Next, next Saturday, as soon as, as soon as everyone else is on mute your mic, because if I see all your windows and you made your ear screens will be fucked.
Speaker: It wasn't the night you tried to kill me. You tried to kill me.
Speaker: I remember in high school, they they had us sing Proud Mary once. That was fun. Yeah. All of them sang a listen. No, no, no. Alyssa has to sing because ah she. No, Alyssa has to sing because she's called me out. out joviss she She called me out. yeah Granted, I will admit, my wife is singing pretty good. actually Nicky actually has a really good voice, too, when she's singing along to the car, car karaoke. When she's in the shower, right, Glick? Some songs, but some songs you do a really good job on. I think it's a lot easier for him, too. Glick can pretty sing pretty good if he's in the Millennium Falcon.
Speaker: yeah and a yeah fucking look and You know what? You know what? I'll be the first one to tell. I'll i'll be the first one to say it. I I love to sing. I love music. Fucking Connor. Fucking Connor. That is guitar playing songs and we could have been fucking singing like I can't I can't carry a tune in a bucket. I can't I can't sing a song. to they My god damn life. But I love to sing. But I love to sing. Fucking trying to sound like that. As far as karaoke goes, I'd be down to do it next Saturday. day It's all about having fun. Let's let's do it. Let's fuck. um I'm yeah like i got umm not to do it because I can't nobody fucking cares. Yeah, but here's the fucking thing. Just fucking do it. You fucking. Here we go. Here we go. I can't sing for shit. You know how many nights I spent on pair.
Speaker: When I was on Periscope, even on TikTok, you know how many nights I was singing fucking Adele? Here we go, mrter i'm yeah Mr. Mr. Armstrong, I'm the champ. I couldn't sing it good. I couldn't sing it well. I wasn't like blowing people's mind because they were like, oh my god, click, you got an amazing voice. No, I just fucking did it. i
Speaker: I just are really hard to sing after too. Good God. Yeah, but here's the thing. very harder and When you can't fucking sing, I hate to tell you this, have it next but if you go to any fucking bar and there's karaoke night and the people that fucking get so fucking hammered thinking they can sing. I got friends in low places and yet they're just out there. They're belting it out that you don't have to get me drunk and I'm fucking sounding that shitty. I had a song to sing and life depended on it. What would it be?
Speaker: Ooh. Ooh. What you got? The alphabet. The alphabet song. Go to hell, Jeff. That's no. Fuck you, you can't move. No, no. No, Jeff. Jeff, when he's singing the ABC song, he makes it sound actual. It's an actual song. Oh, easy, easy song. Easy song. Ice, ice, baby. I have it by heart. I sing it all the time. No, not going to happen. Yeah, Mr. so I think I did it that night. No, I did it. Did you?
Speaker: I don't know. I'm actually trying to find it. No, I was the only one fucking singing on that goddamn show. ah and I beg to differ, sir. I beg to differ, asshole. That's why I'm looking for it. but I don't remember what episode it was. That's the problem. If you had one actual song not taking the easy way out, not anything else, what would it be? What would it be for you guys? Oh, that's a good song. I would do Ice, Ice, Baby. No, I said an actual song that you had to sing and not rap. Dude, rapping is still singing. I hate to break it. It's spoken word fast.
Speaker: because we'renna say not you know ah do you have them on your show The day you get Eminem on your show, I'm going to be in your show and i'mnna I'm going to tell Eminem you're not an actual singer, bro. like you' hearing yeah actual thing what You know what that being said. All right. All right. Okay, calm down there. I know that fucking song word for word. I can kill it every goddamn time and I do both parts and I change my voice up for both parts. Ghost Riders in the sky. even though i couldn't think Even though I can't sing that song. Well, I can't sing for shit, but Ghost Riders in the sky is really good.
Speaker: Oh, okay. Hold on a second. So Girl Striders, that's a good song, by the way. Jeff's going to do Ice, Ice Baby, because he's a fucking player. I'm going to do Regular, because I'm full of shit. And... i I'd probably do From the Ground Up, because I know that one. Oh, good lord. So she's going to do the one that we danced to. Okay. From the Ground Up, Dan Shea. The same ones that do speechless. Yeah. Gay and gay. Oh my God.
Speaker: but I mean. Better watch out. She'll end up coming to your place in Ohio and just pow pow. Just saying. worried about and Hashtag worth it. I was going to say in in our wedding, we had two different Dan and Chase songs. No. Well, yeah. In our wedding, um we danced to one. da so like and Wow that was better than the howl that fucking Glick did.
Speaker: he said you wrote that songboard but my goal of my now the wind
Speaker: I just I just feel that when we do our karaoke next week, we're gonna lose so many people. ah Dude, actually, we and I believe the episode was like really good. Like I said, Connor made us all look like shit. ah Yeah, when Connor was playing the guitar that one night on here, that was great. I should have hopped, but I hopped out early.
Speaker: but Okay.
Speaker: Hey, next time someone asks you to do a howl, fucking from the gut, man. That's how I'm saying it. Hey, next time somebody asks you to do a fucking podcast, shut up and do it and stop me. Good one. Good one, Glick. my mental hole but I'm just getting nervous. I love of you. I'm sorry. Just remember, everyone, this guy talks about, you know, men caring for men, but, you know, he doesn't give a shit. Doesn't give a shit about a person going through some shit. Mr. It's in your fucking head. You know what, actually, actually, I care so goddamn much that I don't put your fucking personal business out there for everybody to hear. How do you like them apples, you cocksucker? I never once put your personal business out there. I didn't say you did. I didn't put your personal business out there. Oh, i I knew you were going through shit. Instead of putting your personal business out there, I made a joke.
Speaker: go
Speaker: Cause that's what I do. Cause I worry about you guys. I can't yeah but at the same time i care about all you assholes, even though none of you guys give a shit about me. Oh, what the fuck max walk out of here. hey that Ladies and gentlemen is how a great podcast host works. You flip it all. you unway wait are he great for you great I don't know about great. You know what? You're right. You're right. Jarvis, not great. but wow Oh Lord, yeah, do it won't do it won't allow it No and jeff here la i know i'm kind of finest Fucking episode I'm gonna prove that I sang more than once my finger was on my fingers on the button Do it go ahead bitch make my day you Sasquatch fuck. I'll say you back hey left Watch it. hey Hey Jarvis watch this
Speaker: Watch what? What am I supposed to want? I didn't want to put it on a show. You had to look at the bottom of my book. You do realize that you're just an admin and I can take it away. and Oh, my God. Then fucking take it away. I'd be here. Oh, no, you're not logged in is the question. Why are you not logged in? Why do I have? Yeah, that's the only way I know how to get on the show. yeah no You don't have to. I just don't know why you're not. But you don't have to. I didn't even know I had to log in because when I go on StreamYard, it shows mine, which is the free version. And then all of a sudden I just go on to fucking, I just click on the button, like you told me to, and it drops down to the... ah what You you you guys just keep justifying everything I've said. I hair i don't care. You know what I care about?
Speaker: Not you. sure
Speaker: fair enough Hey, my wife my wife could be in tears and go like my husband just committed just on a live. And Glick's just like, Alyssa, if you need a shoulder to cry and fuck your husband, he wasn't worth it. Oh, your husband was on his man period and he deleted himself. What a bitch.
Speaker: Because that's how I roll, apparently, according to you guys. Yeah. I probably care about it. I mean, I mean, Wednesday would fucking prove my point. Would you prefer that I put my business, put your business out there rather than making a joke? No! Shouldn't you say that Jarvis is not here tonight? That's what we said here on your period. I mean, what he says when I got, when I - What do you mean by the fucking corner, too? Yeah. That's what we did. What could pull you assholes if Jeff was dead?
Speaker: Yeah. And, and fucking, I mean, Jeff still could be dead. I am. This is from heaven. I believe in too wait you You're going to have it was good and in you you the only one mad about the fact that I made a joke out of you not being here rather than putting your person to be one. I'm not going to give you one. No, from now on, from now on, I'm putting everybody's personal business out on the podcast. Go ahead yeah i like get fight with a neighbor and get arrested again. I'm putting it out there. jerey Okay. Okay. Okay. With Jeff, i know know you you don't know how to fucking do a show. I'm putting it out there. um Personal business. Is that really personal business? I mean, come on. We've been trying to get Connor to do a fucking Monday night show and but like, let's go. so I'm just saying, I'm just saying I'm not.
Speaker: Mark and Brian, you guys are too busy but having weird garden gnome wish version of Stone Cold Steve Austin sex to do anything. um I'm putting it out there. fuck you guys. I care. I care more about you guys than I do my own damn self and I always put you guys first and then I catch some shit. So, you know what? Fuck you guys because you do the most stupidest shit in the world. Mr. Oh, I'm the tramp could show fucking a river. You know what? It's all good. It's all good. I know Jeff gets arrested. You have a mental breakdown.
Speaker: i I think people knew I had the fuck I was gonna have a fucking mental breakdown. You can see it my fucking face half the time I'm doing the fucking shows. You have like 47 metal breakdowns a show. Facts. No, fuck you guys. fuck you guys no it's all about me and it's all about content now y 'all keep doing dumb shit behind the scenes man wait wait our lives weren't for fucking content no i'm just here to make fun of anybody i think that me personally i don't put your your personal stuff out there unless you guys put your personal stuff out there
Speaker: ah people know about my I think that I try very hard not to do that. You know, I don't put my personal stuff out there that should not be on the show. And and I don't think you guys, I'm not going to put your guys' personal shit out there. Now, if you come on this show and you're like, and Jeff's like, just so you guys know from here on forward, I want you to call me Juan Wick. I kicked my neighbor's ass and I'm banging. Well, I'm not really banging. I'm just having weird, awkward phone sex with like board shapes. forative
Speaker: then then after he says that then it's like fair game like game on right and we call him one wick and and then when he brags about i have three girlfriends yeah but they all look like 10 000 miles away you winning tiger blood tiger blood i think jeff needs to change his name now to one wick I'm not doing it. Jarvis. No, it's left the goal. Everybody that you got Baker acted and you spent three days in the Looney bin, then it's out there and then we're going to have fun with it and you're going to have fun with it. And of course, well, fuck Connor. I don't give a goddamn about Connor's personal life. The son of a bitch ain't got no legs. And he is the reincarnation of Joe Biden and Joe Biden's not even dead. So how Joe Biden was reincarnated, reincarnated already? I don't know. Well, Connor.
Speaker: sleeping connor no like bitch ass no it's just i'm just kidding i actually love connor to death he's my favorite person on the box on the network no so it's jeff to me but no jeff's definitely not my favorite person on the network i hated jeff since the day i met him i'm just stuck with fucking jeff for the rest of my goddamn life it's like AIDS no Monday is usually where I air out my shit, or try to. But no, after the show, after the show, we'll talk more about Monday. Yeah, Jeff, after the show. What?
Speaker: yeah shee's fucking Don't call me. You're so dangerous.
Speaker: Yeah. Cause then if fucking, if no one takes charge, then we got to fucking hear about it. but good talking about it love a jealy fee Hey, he's mine. I don't share. Bitch, I'll fight you. Shut up. Oh, just, just ask, just ask Stephen how it goes with me fighting. think i'm afraid You fucking fight dirty. Okay. I don't want to hear it, Alyssa. I'll bob and weave. I'll stick my thumb in your fucking eye hole. I'll Alyssa, I'll kick you straight in the uterus. Don't fuck with me. I'll kick you right in the uterus. I think Glick's going to wonder why we did.
Speaker: why g clickck one and you'll miss I grew up with four sisters.
Speaker: Jokes on you. I'm going to laugh when Alyssa goes to kick Glick and the balls and then Alyssa's just like, wow, they must be smarter than Nikki says they are. My balls are huge. My penis is small.
Speaker: don't worry buddy you're the only you're not the old one. My my genitalia area looks like a furry. Evidently you know Wes knows something more about my. He's like a kendall. My genitalia area looks like a furry sea turtle.
Speaker: Mickey said Christopher Scott. It's a big shell, little head, and lots of fur. a or Alyssa's sitting there got a visual in her head like Jesus Christ. That poor woman. You know the stoner, you know the stoner turtle from, from, from, from finding him. Imagine him furry. and so
Speaker: Well, basically the big Lebowski, the dude.
Speaker: when i When I first met Blaze, I literally thought he was the big Lebowski. because look a what That's Wes. No. Wes is like the older version of the big Lebowski. Wes, Wes is actually... I'm with you, James. I'm with you. Ew. No. You know, you know, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if, if and and and Tommy Chong and Tommy Chong and the big gilbowski had a baby Jeff Bridges would be it would be Wes. Yes. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. I'm just saying that super chill super stone just dude. Wes would Wes puts Willie Nelson to shame. Well, I was I was I was talking about it in the other day. I said, you know, the dude doesn't show up until he's five joints deep.
Speaker: you Do it maybe 25 joints no like he showed up last our days he's like I've already had four and I was like, yeah So normal Saturday i leave by Saturday No, is it really? Yeah He was nine deep last Saturday is nine deep but I'd be in a coffin Too deep I'd be in a fucking coffin agree that deep I'd be in a coffin I yeah
Speaker: I did Jeff you see what happened when I had a whole gummy at the start of the show. Yeah, but like ah cohead person smoking it I Had to leave Jeff and Tony to do a goddamn show without me. Well, also also Nikki was like let's get it back That was scary that was the second That was the second time when it was like, I barely made it to break. And then like two hours later, I'm still listening to these two assholes talking about some movie from the nineties. And it's just like, Oh my fucking God. Now that was just your high. Oh no. So I, so, so, so I fell off and went and died. And then Nikki found me dead in the shower and then
Speaker: And then she got me in bed and she was like, are you good? And then all of a sudden I'm like, she gets in bed. All right. And I was eating potato. I was eating peanut butter and banana sandwiches. I was eating, uh, uh, I was eating peanut butter and tomato and potato chips sandwiches. Dude. I was, I was just like, I'm sorry. fa
Speaker: I could just see fucking Glick running through the fucking match just like Just like fucking full -on fucking Sasquatch run down the streets people are fucking yeah Like I was I was full Sasquatch mode I was just going through the cabinets be like if I put this this and this together it might be pretty high. Yeah You know You know, who has our and on that butter tomato would be good. You know, you know, okay first and foremost such a whore mouth, Alyssa, tomato sandwich, because you know that sounds it sounds disgusting. it's But but it is the best thing you'll ever put in your mouth. And you've had Jarvis in your mouth. So trust me, you can't do any better. It's over, actually.
Speaker: We have peanut butter and we have, I want a peanut butter and tomato sandwich. I'm with Alyssa. I would eat a banana and peanut butter sandwich before I eat a peanut butter and tomato sandwich. Trust me. Do not knock it until you try it. And this is 100%. Oh no, I'm knocking. Do you like tomatoes?
Speaker: Yeah. you Okay. You don't like tomatoes. You bet you like peanut butter. I mean, peanut butter. not a butger It's butter, butter. Yes, he does. How do you think he got out of the network? Glick felt sorry for me. He wanted me on the show. Jarvis loves the peanut butter post. He does his ball tickle thing. It's awesome. Always asking me when I'm going to do another fucking my own show.
Speaker: I'd have to give up every - I'd have to give up Monday's show, I'd have to give up Wednesday, just so I could focus on saturday Sunday. That's what would happen. Oh my fucking god. I'm so important and I'm so amazing. I'm not saying I'm fucking amazing. Give a fucking Wednesday show if it's epic of a fucking deal, man. Well, I mean, I was gonna say that, but, you know, it's good for me. Back to your question though. You're fucking, you actually, let me make it easier for you. You're fucking fired on Wednesdays. Yeah. I mean, it's kind of like a Saturday. It's kind of like a pretty Saturday show anyway. So I mean, it's not like it's really for my feelings. Sunday and Monday, you're fired on Wednesday. Don't come back on Wednesday. Okay. Does that make it easy for you? Do I have to be the bad guy? Do I have to be the asshole? Is that what you want?
Speaker: mean aren't you always? Do your goddamn sports show.
Speaker: Do the show outside of Monday because you're really good on Monday as well. You're awesome on Monday. Oh, I guess so Mark. Mark.
Speaker: Mark's like, so do you think you'd ever not do Mondays? And I'm like, no, I've loved Monday's show. No, you kick ass on fucking Mondays and you kick ass on fucking Wednesdays as well. I was going to change Wednesdays up and make it better for everybody. I'm still going to change Wednesdays up to make it better for everybody. But you know, if you don't want to do fucking Wednesdays, you're fucking dead. You're dead. You're fucking dead. For now, I don't think doing a Wednesday show. You're fucking dead. So then I can focus on once I'm done with Monday's show, then I can. first getting that jordan on Oh my fucking God. Okay. Donald Trump. No, that was okay. so but ah my vin sick mary Come on, man. yeah why Why would anyone ever want to be Vince McMahon with the shit that fucking guy is facing right now? Maybe I'm going to do the things that he's accused of doing to you.
Speaker: may have you've already done it to Jeff you've already done it to Connor you've done it to Tony D like maybe maybe I'm gonna have maybe I'm gonna have Jeff where night is shit on your chest good god ah Jeff no yeah church joe Jeff's just sitting there crying i know to jar problem solve jevis sha You're fired on Wednesday nights. Go kick ass. Do your thing, man. Jesus fucking Christ, man. Oh, my God. Thanks, Jeff. And anyway, back to the question that you asked me, Glick. I don't even remember what that was. What was the question? You had to go on a tangent. I don't want to talk to you until you eat a peanut butter and tomato sandwich.
Speaker: You asked if I like peanut butter. you and Well, he asked if he liked peanut butter and we already know. I asked if she liked peanut butter, Jeremy. She a little frisky dog. Put him back in his cage, Alyssa. But anyway. Yeah, because you think the cage is going to stop me. But I don't like peanut butter. Oh, you don't like it. I don't like the texture of peanut butter. Okay, so oh never i was straight up eating straight up eating peanut butter. But like if it's a bar or something that changes the consistency of it. I love it. But do you like fucking people that can sit there and fucking eat cinnamon? Oh, that's right out of the fucking jar i can't know sandwiches.
Speaker: What? really never mind i'm just talking to her unless it's just like a very thin layer pe of peanut butter on there oh no i gob it on please i'm so over the curve what that fucking you're the motherfucker that wants to come on here and be like well fine night jar where are you but
Speaker: and okay but i'm I'm the same way with coconut. and ah no yeah i can't I don't do coconut. oh good know that that's like people putting pineapple on pizza it's like if you want to be silent if you want to be slapped in the face then put pineapple on pizza don't jump on the bandwagon when it comes to pineapple on pizza it's not bad when you're drunk pineapple does not belong on pizza pineapple on pizza
Speaker: Anyone that puts pineapple on pizza deserves to get slapped. Hey, slap away. I don't mind it. likes pieapple on beef I like pineapple on pizza. I'm not mad at it. but You also like pineapple on your mouth. That don't make it right, Jeff. That makes it tasty.
Speaker: My kid's calling me. Oh my god. change the fucking ringtone. I put peanut. I put butter.
Speaker: but the he As soon as I read that, why did I go fucking? What is his fucking name? but I literally went Gary Busey when I read that. ah you put I like butter sausage. I don't like butter sausage. Get it out of here. I said spunkle. There was something I looked at. I was like, what? I like butter spunkle. Oh, geez. Get this guy out of here. Get out of here. God damn Canadians. Making fucking Canadians look bad.
Speaker: now ah you all pineapple on pizza is not terrible meara it not it's gross pineapple does not belong on pizza you are gross we allow you on this show that's like fucking people that literally will eat a cheese pizza thinking they're actually eating pizza it's like go fuck yourself go to ah I'll be that person. you fuck If you're going to have a pizza and you're like, oh, I just want cheese on my pizza. There's nothing wrong with just putting cheese on it. I'm a man. yeah What? It's fucking boring. Thank you. I am a simple man. I am a simple man and I love just pepperoni and cheese. cream and
Speaker: I will create i' commit domestic violence if you don't - What she say? What she say? He likes boring ice cream and boring ass pizza. See, this is why Nicki and I get along better than you do. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Nicki likes vanilla. You know what? You know what, Glick? Actually, get up. Nicki, when you get dressed and all that, come yeah you be Glick tonight. No, thank you. We need the voice of reason. We need the voice of reason here. I have nothing wrong with the plain pizza. It's not my first choice. Seven o 'clock last night. You fucking put toppings on that pizza and be a fucking man. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. First and foremost.
Speaker: I am my my favorite pizza out there. I love a simple pepperoni and cheese pizza. I guess do too. It doesn't bother me. But I, you know, there's nothing wrong with the cheese pizza, but my favorite pizza, simple pepperoni and cheese pizza, especially if it's good, especially if it's from a good pizza, like if it's from a good pizza place. Papa John's kind of doing, yeah. Like like don't don't ruin like Papa However, however, I like um and green pepper
Speaker: she said spam pa and no your foot being You put the ingredients on that fucking pizza you put bacon you put pepper on you you put sausage you yeah called partni for Yes, I get the carnivore and I add green pepper olives I pretty much put everything on it the exception of like I watched, I watched, I watched. You're Mary and Glick. I mean, let's be honest. That's. Not, not only am I. only am I watching. I am fried rice and fish. Big Macs in one show, but I've also watched Jeff devour a pizza that is three feet long by three feet wide. but but You just sound jealous. and it was I got a hollow leg. I, I, I lend it, I lend it, I lend it out to Connor so he can walk.
Speaker: why jes there's nothing wrong with a good cheese pizza i don't find i sometimes that's what you crave and that's what you want man I get it well you know cheese pizza when it's good and greasy after a hangover fuck your solid dude cheese pizz is
Speaker: I have a real problem with spam. i need no problem I have a real problem with poor people food because I was a welfare baby and I grew up with my mom being on welfare and and and and I'm not like as in a grown ass man, as a grown ass adult, I don't want to eat welfare food anymore. The only thing welfare that I want to eat is welfare cheese or I was gonna say government cheese that's it's good yeah can I'll eat the hell out of government but spam you were just talking about peoplezz because we're talking about you really have to ask the guy you're gonna marry why he's talking about this um with fried rice fuck yeah I can't do I can't do anything at all i I've never been a fan of spam
Speaker: I don't expect. A good cheese pizza really just fucking hits the spot. Nothing on it. You don't need nothing extra. It just fucking hits. Perfect. Yeah. I like, I like, I like sausage and I like green peppers and I like much. Yeah. You like the sausage. We know.
Speaker: you're fucking little fucking sorry especially especially the elephant bitch I can't have gonna eat it so god I got your trying to be the voice of reason. Then she's like, I don't like onions. I don't like this. so what yeah i don allow You know, Nikki, you know, Nikki, I wished you happy birthday and you know what? I take it back. So now I got to go on Facebook and take it back. First and foremost, I will, I will, I will stick up for her. I am the reason why she cannot put onions on her pizza. However,
Speaker: really Unless there's a really good fart. I am really weird about onions. Really? Oh, dude. So here's what I ordered on my last pizza, which I i literally had on the show, like the ones I get on the show. I get chicken, pepperoni, onion, cheddar cheese. um Fuck. I can't remember how to say that in English. um Mushroom, ham. uh i don't know how to say green green pepper uh hamburger uh tomato sauce on mozzarella cheese um bacon and what's the other one mozzarella cheese too
Speaker: yeah And cheddar, not cheddar, it's sour cream. Not sour cream, not sour cream. It's a Philadelphia cheese. No, it's Philadelphia cheese. Cream cheese, cream cheese. Yeah, cream cheese. Oh, dude, it's a fucking game changer, bro. Because the first time I heard it, I did the same thing you did. I went. And the wife was like, get it. We'll try it. I was like, you know what? This is how I get it from now on. So Jeff, my question to you is being, you said if it's in the kitchen, put it on the pizza. Oh, I'm in. If I put anchovies on the pizza, you'd still eat it. and Not my first choice, but yeah. you i'll I'll eat it. you you oh they got it with yeah egg they got a They got a Texas spicy barbecue pizza at at Domino's. Holy shit.
Speaker: I want to say this. I want to go ahead and say this and this doesn't I'd rather put my dick in a blender than eat cream cheese. Yeah. It's good for you. I like cream cheese. Don't get me wrong. Dude, it was a game changer, bro. I think, Jeeves, you're not helping yourself at all. Yeah, you're circling the drain, my friend. No, like, I don't think I've ever ordered anchovies. I'm gonna go ahead and say this, and this doesn't a this this thus just encompass pizza. This is just in general. I am so fucking over this goddamn chicken bacon ranch craze. Same. Thank you.
Speaker: Great. thank you Yeah. Nikki said said chicken, bacon, ranch, pasta, chicken, bacon, ranch, pizza, chicken, bacon, ranch. God, I'm done. I'm done. It's going to come to your wedding and stand.
Speaker: i was already where I will fight her little munching gilled ass. No, you don't. You should be scared of me. Ask Steven, he usually runs the opposite way when he tells me I'm going to get you mad. Oh, whatever. Whatever, Alyssa. You know what? You were talking about the chicken, bacon, ranch, or whatever. I'm the same thing with Flamin' Hot. I'm so sick of the Flamin' Hot shit. Is that where you draw the line, Chris? Because you pretty much put your dick anywhere that is allowed. Hey, Chris, I'm sorry to say it, but you know what?
Speaker: my yeah real and that's not real man Every time we go to the goddamn grocery store together, I'm over the hot shit. Why does everything have to be fucking flaming hot? Yeah. Okay. everyone i'm with you Like I love Doritos. I love Doritos and Doritos are like, we got a new flavor. It's cheeseburger, cheeseburger, flaming hot. Why? Yeah. No need, no need. I'll just try it. Now that's not an actual flavor because actually Doritos does have a cheeseburger flavor. Really really? And it's actually really good. Oh, I'm not mad at that. It's like crack good. It's like crack good. It's actually really good. But you know what I mean? Like they're like, like glaze is like. Like stop being extra. Yeah. Just give me something I can check.
Speaker: we get nobody you know a plain jalapeno chip i never had flaming hot anything because i'm just like what if i buy it i don't like it what if i buy it and then that's all i want to eat fuck that oh okay first and foremost chiefs i've done that a couple of times It's actually really good. I don't recommend it because you got it. I'm okay. So there's been a few times where I've been shocker. I've been incredibly drunk and I was like, I got tomato, oh not Glick. I got peanut butter and I got bananas combined the best of both worlds, much like Hannah Montana. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I can't do bananas on anything. I fucking hate banana.
Speaker: and i and It's not the taste it's the consistency it's it's well river Banana dude bananas go with everything No in my trash bag because I believe I will you know what fuck you Jeff Fuck Jeff and fuck you Alyssa Jarvis is my only friend in here tonight. I don't even like this guy already fired See, yeah I hope Nikki runs the other way from your kisses when you eat those sandwiches. I agree. She doesn't. Actually, I get more kisses than she takes pictures of me and sends them to her son.
Speaker: Oh, Nikki. Don't be like that. So you're saying she's retarded too. That thing is when she's sending those pictures, the caption says, don't be like this man. Be smart. So what you're saying is, what you're saying is, as she's getting older, her Alzheimer's is kicking in. I think the sandwich that I was eating that she sent a picture of to her son the night she tried to kill me was... peanut butter, banana, and potato chips. Yes. And you were walking around with a bag of veggie straws. And I had a bag. Oh my God. I love it. Oh my God. Once again, they're just french fries. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. They're not french fries. No, what was it you said like on Wednesday, you're like, you're like, they're, they're potato sticks. And I was like,
Speaker: Yeah, yeah rhythm and their their their potato steak. They're like, they're like potato chips, you know, but they they're, they're in the stick form. And they're veggies like tomato, they're healthy for you. Dude, if I if it says healthy, I don't know. Really not bad. I'll pay for your calls and veggie chips. Oh, I want veggie chips. I got 14 pounds of Taco Bell sitting out there on the couch that I'm going to go eat when I get done here tonight. Now I want fish chips. Mexican food is on my couch. That is not authentic. Oh no, he's doing that because he knows my wife's watching. She's going to be like, i I think she fell back asleep. Taco hell.
Speaker: Yeah, I'm sure she fell asleep. yeah No, because it's so it's like 640 45 in the morning. Yeah. She had a French dick ball in her. Yeah. Oh, my God. No, it's like I don't like talk. I never have a woman with me for a woman another woman than a French guy. OK. No, eating eating Taco Bell has no appeal to me anymore. What you've had the authentic real shit from here. Zero interest. Oh, bro. I love carrots. I love carrots. Dude, carrots with some ranch dressing. and i'm in yeah yeah no and know if you If you go to the actual country, like, you know, like, you know, and and Jeff won't admit it because he's fucking in Mexico and he thinks it makes it cool. But we have,
Speaker: Here in Ohio, and ohio there's ah there's a family that immigrated here. Right, and no that's authentic shit. But it's still got a different flavor. They opened a restaurant. ah i think ah greatgra I think great -grandparents opened a restaurant. where we went to where where we were to the career center that that was the first restaurant and then they're like that like the shit is fucking real as as you can get in the states outside of probably like
Speaker: the fucking FAG States like Texas. and Yeah, that's not, Tex -Mex is not. mexican they like Like Texans can't even touch authentic Mexican food like this restaurant. Now as the family's expanded and grown, they've opened multiple restaurants and it's like real authentic, real deal Mexican food. Yeah, like they make their own fucking tortillas. You order a burrito for yourself, this is a burrito that's meant to eat, meant to feed like 47 family members. Oh yeah. You know what I mean? And it comes with everything. Like it's it's it's a real deal. Holy milk. Actually Nikki's got a uh where where she where she's from. There's a Mexican restaurant there where they're all like we just hop
Speaker: ah but Yeah, they're all border hoppers. Yeah, they like we just jumped out of the box truck and open the Mexican restaurant. deal So like that's all finished. I obviously I know Taco but I agree. Yeah, that its it's your side mouth. You fucking dirty horse that don't like Taco Bell. That is the Hey, don't get me wrong. I love some Taco Bell boy. I love that shit. You know what? I don't even like you anymore. You don't eat peanut butter. You don't eat tomatoes. You don't like Taco Bell. Jarvis, she's not sure about it. I do eat peanut butter. I just don't eat it plain. Jarvis, file for divorce tomorrow. I'm surprised she hasn't filed for a divorce. I think if I was her, I would. Are you guys actually even really married or she just keeps you locked in the cage? Keeps me locked in the cage.
Speaker: How many other written pages? Jarvis, how many others are in cages down there in the basement where you are? I don't know. ah start Hold hands and say kubai at night. but Jarvis is like, I don't know. I'm going to sit on the couch and play Xbox. I fucking love Taco Bell. I eat Taco Bell like once a week. You eat Taco Bell more than that. yeah No, no, I try to talk about once a week. If I'm a if I'm allotted to talk about more than once a week, will I? Hell, yeah. As much as I but bad my like nicki i won why most i go to that, is yes, that'd be allotted the time to eat Taco Bell. I'm a busy man. Motherfucker, I'll eat whatever I fucking want. If people are when we first started the show.
Speaker: When we first started the show, this motherfucker would call me and he's like, I'm like, what you doing? He's like nothing. And then all of a sudden, welcome to Wendy. He's talking to this motherfucker. I'm also asshole. We started the show that all my door dash delivery, delivery drivers knew me by a personal basis. There was multiple times when we were doing this show when we were talking, I was like, yeah, door's open. Come on in. And he'd be like, like,
Speaker: uh, Tom, the door dash guy, of yeah it's like there was a, there was a couple, there was a, there was a lesbian couple door dash together. And, and, and, and one time we were doing this show and I was like, you know, I ordered door dash because if my kids weren't home, I just ordered a door dash. So I didn't have leftovers. And, uh, I'm like, you know, I put in the nose doors open, come on in and, and, you you know, girl came in and And we're doing this show and she's like, Oh, you got to come down and see my new car and blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, yeah, nice. And she's like, yeah, the last car we were out door dashes. Somebody hit me and door dash insurance gave me enough money to buy me this car and just like, all right, we'll see you in a minute.
Speaker: and yeah So, we're going on break. Like we just got a back on break, no less. Uh, one night we were doing the show and this and COVID and one of my favorite pizza shops here in town. Uh, I learned that they delivered beer and we were doing the show on the side. I remember that night. and I was like, Jeff, they deliver beer. And he was like, do you have to, I just called and I was going to order a food. and And then I was like, jokingly, I was like, you bring me a toll bag of Budweiser and they're like, yeah, we will. And I was like, wait a minute.
Speaker: Really? Like ah before we started that night, it was like, headband story started. Hold on, before we start, I'm gonna order my food. And he's like, dude, they got, he's like, no, he does one of these. Dude, they got beer.
Speaker: So I canceled my food order and just ordered a bunch of beer.
Speaker: yeah And the delivery guy came in and he was like, so you just let me put it in the normal spot and afraid of like, yeah, go ahead, man. Like I knew the Yeah. There was a door dashes that I use that would come in and we would like sit down and play a ah game of Madden together. I was always door dashing. I did that a lot. I used to, I knew all my door dashes. I never, well like. Just remember Nikki, you're marrying this. i I used to order these giant fucking sandwiches and said i and I showed, I showed it to Glick one day. It stands like this. I did all my shoes door dashing. That happens to me never. And then she went, Oh, please spit on that. Spit on that.
Speaker: but but guy actually but you took the dip boy you yeahor sure i'd hit on you too then she would say no sorry no drunk dude i totally would have done it when you deliver my favorite like nick the fucking message she sprays him in the face with mace like i know time to run away but how about you eat my burrito later? you know And a fuzzy turtle. It can't be both.
Speaker: well ah and five ah It depends on how he identifies that day. It's 20, 24. You can't. I know I over the Vienna sauce. You want to watch instant family. Is that better?
Speaker: Steven, did you watch the new Beverly Hills copy yet? No. Yeah, it's worth it, buddy. I'm not paying that much money for fucking Netflix, sorry. I'll send you a link. Nikki, I'm trying to run away. I'm paying $7 .99 a month for Netflix. I'm not fucking being a cheap ass and getting the fucking goddamn ads because God forbid can't pay $16 fucking dollars for the no ads, sorry. It's in there, use it.
Speaker: It's in there. um It's in in the private chat. I just sent you a link. Okay. Click on that and and you'll be able to actually, you look it up. That's the homepage. But once you're in there, you you type in Beverly Hills cop, you'll find all four. And you have to skip, you know you you'll get like four ads pop up before to let you do it. But then once it plays, you watch whole fucking movie ad free. It won't work on an iPhone. back But not like I put it up on the computer. I watched I watched the movie the other day because I got rid of my Netflix because I never used it. um Well, most times there's nothing on Netflix. And for the fucking amount of the price, they want you to fucking pay just for a regular subscription to watch. And it's like 10 bucks. It's like 10 bucks. I just got rid of it because I never use it. I spent all my time on HBO and Prime. It's like 17 dollars here in the U .S.
Speaker: she's like oh that's sounds safe but cause fuck I watched needs stuff fuck I watched it oh hey you have money give us more but we were talking about it in the beginning of the show yeah i watch it it holds up it's I fucking thought it was hilarious I could probably I could probably buy it on movies and TV app no wrong the app I just or the link I just saying you it's fucking breathe yeah I like, I've watched, I've watched, um do you want to watch instant family? What's instant family? ah Mark Wahlberg. Is that Mark Wahlberg? That's a good movie, that's a good movie. and We love that movie. The movie is like 20 years old. No, you need to watch the new Mark Wahlberg movie where he's a former spy. No. I got to figure out what it's called. It was good, I laughed my ass off, dude. Alyssa, yes or no?
Speaker: Because if you want to, I'm going to put it on now and I'm fucking watching it. It's called the family plan. I never even heard of that one. It came out last year. Oh. Sounds familiar. He's he's like a former spy, and but his family doesn't know. And then all of a sudden he like people are coming after him. So he's like, let's go on a vacation. We'll take the car. yeah Not come out last year. What? Family plan? Instant family was 2018. Yeah, and family plan was 2023. Arthur the King, which is Wahlberg's newest movie, is twenty this this year. Well, what one's on Apple's TV? $23 for Netflix and Canon. How much is Netflix now? ah Family plans on Apple TV, by the way.
Speaker: Cause that, that one I have a free free trial for because of my new phone. Yeah. im watching on that That link you can watch them. Oh my God. Are you one of those people? What? She's got a fucking apple. Yes. and have an app chair ah for the worst spring yeah it's I have Good luck with any Android. They all break on me. They never had good luck with men either.
Speaker: Okay. My Android, I've had for a little over two years. I'm going to go on Chewy. Fuck you. My Apple. What's crazy, Jarvis? Come on. My Apple phone. Oh, my God. Rangeland. My Apple phones last at least five years. The only reason I've had this for as short as I did is because I just bought it. Oh, never had a problem. This is a Samsung galaxy S seven.
Speaker: The phone. I have as much as your iPhone. This, the phone I currently have is a Samsung. What do we have as 23 plus is the Samsung galaxy S 23 plus this phone. If I plug it in and charge it, it still fucking works. Yeah. This motherfucking phone is 16 generations younger than this one.
Speaker: Samsung, Android. Samsung makes a great phone. I agree. Samsung makes a great phone. Let's see if I can, I don't actually, what downfall is I don't have a charge report anymore. We have a charger for it. It's just my microphone is plugged into. My microphone is plugged in right now. Actually, did Christopher use this phone? We were going to. We were going to give this phone to Christopher, but which is Nikki's youngest son. But my daughter used this phone for, like, what, two months? Yes. Two, three months or something like that while we were waiting on her new time, because she's one of them iPhone people.
Speaker: This is the greatest phone I've ever had on her with this goddamn phone. And I keep, I don't even know why I still have it. Other than the fastest because it's paid for. Geez. Yeah. There's no reason for me to get rid of it. I, you know, it's just, it's great. Geez. I had a five S that was my first iPhone ever. I dropped it so many times though that I broke the speaker, but that wasn't until like I had that one for at least eight, maybe even 10 years. I've had this for over three years. I'm done. I don't even have a crack scheme. Mine's perfect. We got Netflix for free for our provider as well. But when Netflix did that whole, you're not allowed to share bullshit. We gave our free Netflix to Nikki's mom and dad.
Speaker: who are not disappointed in me and I'm a good child. You try to. Everybody's disappointed in you. ah try Even your wife to be. his I said a video. We have a group chat on Facebook with her mom and dad and her and I and I said a video of her yesterday and I said, come get your kid and her mom's like, nope, you have to keep her and I said, but I kept that see
Speaker: I got the receipt. And that's not fair. I can't return you to your mom because she's in a box under your driver's seat. and My dad hates me. So well, my parents died when I was born. So that i an or I don't even have real parents. Why in the hell do you drive around with your mother underneath your driver's seat?
Speaker: as much have people still in a car prepared for this answer because As my dad likes to remind me, I am a terrible son and I'm fucking worthless. and mother's in a tupper where My mom is in ah mom's ashes are in a Tupperware container. wrapped in a Ziploc bag because, okay, okay. So, all right. Not that I can - Catch all the bag. Yeah, not that I can justify this or make this entire equation any better, but I am looking for a specific type of urn to put my mom's ashes in.
Speaker: Yeah, but once again, dude, do you have a place you could put it? You can put her in a closet, for fuck's sake. Yeah. Somebody steals a car. You lost your mom, too. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. So check this out. So when I got my mom's ashes, it was right before it was at our runaway party, right before we left to go to Charleston. And long story short,
Speaker: most donated her body to science. So it took a long time to get her ashes back. I see. Oh, we got her ashes back. Because that was like, the thing, you know, I was like, I want to have mom buried. I want to do the blah, blah, blah, blah, but her stupid ass idiot husband. Uh, who is now dead. I don't mean to speak ill, ill of the dead, but fuck that fucking piece of shit, scumbag. Tell us how you really killed my mother. You called me a racist because I moved to South Carolina.
Speaker: that you are racist. And I didn't talk to the guy for like 10 years. And then he called me out of the blue and spent like three hours telling me how horrible fucking son I was. And I'm like, bitch, first and foremost, your dumb ass just mooshed off with my mom because she was on government assistance and you fed into her addiction and I'm a terrible son. And where are your fucking kids at? Because all of his kids were dead because they were all drug addict alcoholics like him. Uh, anywho, not neither here nor there, but you know, so he was married to her. Obviously that means more than what the fucking kids' wishes are. Yeah, I get that. Uh, so it took a long time to get her ashes back because they were doing the whole weird science thing. I don't know.
Speaker: ah And then he handed me rashes in a fucking Tupperware container. Not even Tupperware, like a glad container. And I was like, all right, I'm just gonna - Oh, yeah, I know what you wanted to talk about, yeah. I'm gonna slide it under my car seat so that I don't lose them and I know where they are. and This was like before we went to Charleston. And that's where they always were. and i And then one time, I actually, at one point in time, I did do that. I i took them out and I put them in a closet. oh When I was down in Charleston, I had i put them in a safe place with my pops, military stuff and everything like that. And, you know, my grandfather's pocket watch and and and and and and and ah his pocket knife that I got when my grandfather passed away, you know, my keepsakes, the stuff that's important to me that I want to have. And I was i was in this had my house down in Charleston. I was down there.
Speaker: And, um, I just don't really sound kind of weird to everybody else. It's just me being me and you know, the the whole paranormal thing that I believe in and whatnot. I was going to say, do you think she's like protecting the car? Yeah. Yeah. So, so like I had everything and ah I had everything in a specific tote and all my keepsakes and, and, and, and whatnot. And, um, and a few other things. And like most of you guys know, it's no big secret. when we When I got the house in Charleston, when I was still married, ah I slept in the garage. I lived in the garage and I'm down in the garage one night and I'm watching TV and there's this fucking commotion out of the closet behind me. i big color much My garage was like a big finished basement.
Speaker: Right. And like eight boxes in this closet just fucking come crashing down. Everything goes everywhere. My dad's military stuff is all over the floor. My grandfather's pocket watches over here. His knife is over here. You know, the only thing which should have gone everywhere. The only thing that didn't go everywhere was mom's actions. They, they like literally, boom, lay on the floor. nothing around them. Everything's fine. Everything's cool. So then I put her back in the car. and I call her road rage. And now Nikki calls her road rage, Roger. And, and that's just where she's always been. and And, and I, and I say that I'm looking for a specific earn because my mom used to collect, my mom was a teddy bear collector. Okay.
Speaker: see She collected teddy bears for days, whether they was care bears or stuffed bears or whatever. It was all teddy bears. So I want an urn that's in the shape of a teddy bear. I ran into two two problems. A, I can never find them. And B, when I do find one, they want every daaaaaaaiculous amount of money for one. I don't make a lot of money. I get that. urns aren't cheap. Mike. But I've also come to the terms with the fact that, A, when I am able to purchase said urn for mom and and get her in the house and you know whatever, I also need to make sure that I have something that I hang from my rearview mirror that I put her in because I really do. I feel like she she absolutely watches over
Speaker: me and now Nikki drives my car just as much as I do, but whoever's driving said car, I think mom watches over and protects. Yeah, you got to get yourself like a little hacky sack that you put a little bit over in there. Nikki acts like a daggone fool and drives like a crazy person. Mom comes out from under the seat, hits her in the ankles. that
Speaker: just cuts her tilles sir Achilles tendon like okay but for some reason it's the reason why I think you're really talking about yourself and not Nicky no no ni mean like crazyass person we named your road raise rob but no no I don't drive like a lunatic I drive ah my kids don grandma on a Sunday I was going to say maybe maybe the opposite end of the stuff from there. Like an old lady going to church. i a ra at And I don't. i i buy I have. Trust me. I'm like, I wish I had the power of telekinesis so I could try to motherfucker and flip somebody off into the woods somewhere or flip them off to the side of the road or like I have road rage for a days.
Speaker: But I also drive like a sensible human being. However, fucking Kurt Russell and death machine are over here is doing 105 miles an hour and a 35 mile an hour work zone. And she doesn't understand in Ohio. I don't know how things work in Pennsylvania, but in Ohio, if the work zone is 45 and you do 50, the cops will shoot you dead on the street and it's justified. Yeah.
Speaker: you take on the work so you know The problem is with work zones on any highways, they last for four years if they fix a fucking problem. Taylor Hart. Taylor Hart the third over here thinks that she can just make her own rules on the road. And I'm like, baby, I know you guys have only had actual paved streets for like the last five years in Pennsylvania. ah And you're used to riding around in your horse and buggy. But in Ohio, we do think it's a little different. It was a bat. It was a bat. jeff
Speaker: right now
Speaker: I'm marrying a maximish.
Speaker: My little Mexican Amish queen over here. As such they're effect I told as i told her her name her, her name on her birth certificate is Nicole Elizabeth Guadalupe Marie yeah Rodriguez Gutierrez Yoder. you neither of those things
Speaker: Are you sure? Hey, Marie's a good middle name. It ain't no wonder she don't touch my furry turtle. That furry turtle. That's, well, what the hell is my daughter's middle name? Which one? Austin. Marie Janae? Marie, yeah, Marie. How in the fuck do you not know what your daughter's middle name is? That's okay, I can really spell my kid's name. Because Marie Janae is...
Speaker: Oh, wait, there's Janae. Oh, sorry. Janae is a family name and ah and and and Austin is like seven, eight, ninth generation to carry that name. However, they won't admit it. Well, her grandma won't admit it, but her family's redneck is fucked and their hillbilly is hell. So like her mom, The first daughter born, every generation, has the has the middle name Jeanette. However, her mom, everybody called her Jean. So her middle name is Jean because both sides of her family are really as fuck. So they're saying Jeanette, they just said Jean.
Speaker: Marie is her aunt's name. My other daughter is Rose, but she's named after Axel Rose. So I thought that name because I was like, her first name, she sounds like she's going to be a stripper.
Speaker: At least you know it, buddy. i Trust me. There is no way in hell my middle daughter will be a stripper. She might be a pimp, but she'll never be a pimp. She's the closet serial killer. She's my sociopath, psychopath, serial killer. Actually, if any of them, now that I'm thinking about it more and more, I think that Ash will be the serial killer. Oh, the songs he was singing and making up. Oh, Addison Fucking Lutely. This kid is absolutely. But Buggy is definitely a sociopath. Alexa.
Speaker: ballexia
Speaker: give them a hatchet for the birthday have kids they said it right i i saw a video the other day that would have been perfect for the conversation we have but i can't find it which conversation about nicki's driving oh my god there's nothing wrong with my driving Well, i saw I saw a video the other day and it's this guy driving on the road normal. If she was a NASCAR driver. No, no. So I saw this video the other day and I think I saw an Instagram. This guy's driving on the road just normal. He's doing like 35, 40 miles an hour. It's like maybe 10, 30, 11 at night. And all of a sudden out of nowhere from a side street comes a horse and buggy and it's drifting and sparks are coming off the fucking tires and shit. And I was like,
Speaker: That would have been perfect for showing everybody how Nicki drives, but I couldn't buy the baby. Okay. No, there's actually Nicki is, Nicki is the only woman I've ever been with that.
Speaker: If she's your words, why would you words live it wisely? I get it. Her driving doesn't always scare me.
Speaker: du You know what? however I know the exact statement you mean. I know the exact feeling. You're hitting the emergency. zone and i You're hitting the imaginary gas or brake pedal all the time. that's ah you I'm riding that motherfucker. we read about you when we When we go to PA, I wouldn't have brakes on my car if I had a brake pedal. Amen to that. I'm good there. She's a good, she is a very good driver. Nikki is, i you know, Tony is a great driver, but there's time for him. However, Nikki's gas pedal foot also weighs about 4 million pounds. Oh, I, my, my, I definitely have a speed limits mean nothing to her.
Speaker: You know, that's the crazy thing. So, you know, as somebody that loves to drive stupid fast, I, I'm kind of like, if I'm by myself, Oh yeah, I'm, I'm doing 150 all the time. Ohio is a lot different than PA. You can get away with this MPA. They will shoot you on the spot in Ohio. Dude, anytime Nicky wants to really drive fast, we can do it in Mexico. If we get pulled over, it's 20 bucks, dude. We're good. They will murder you in Ohio for what you do in PA. And it's fine. It's actually not even murder. It's a shit accident. Yeah. Just fight homicide. Hey, I typically only go five miles per hour faster than the post -feed limit. I do send it.
Speaker: but i have a friend was I have a friend who i was i have a friend who' is a police officer and he was like, anything over seven, we're going to get your ass. Seven over, we don't care. So I do i do anywhere between five and seven miles. or speedla Nikki, the speed limit's 25, or 20 miles an hour in a school zone, and she's like 135. That'll do. Nah. Fuck your kids. For me, it decide it depends on who's in the car with me. If I'm by myself, oh, I get there in five minutes. Don't worry about it. But if I get the kids or somebody in the car, I'll drive even.
Speaker: I do. I do. Five to seven miles an hour over this speed limit. And i dropp like for me, it depends on where I'm at. Oh, I'm in a town. in high whoa Mr. Jerry, we, she calling you out. He said, you said more like 20. You drive like Nikki. No, I don't drive that fast. Calm down. Jeff Gordon. um Unless I'm passing grandma, but then I might go that fast, but
Speaker: if i'm If I'm driving in town, I will only speed limit. Well, that's the crazy thing here. That's the crazy thing here. The speed limits here fucking cracked me up. Blake, your head would explode. Nikki would love it. Because there are sections on the highway from here to Playa Del Carmen. It is a 45 -minute drive if you're doing the speed limit. But there's sections where it says, it's in kilometer. So it'll say 100, 90, 80, 70, 100. And you're like, what is it? So I just keep it locked in a hundred foot all day. I mean, I'm talking like 20 feet, a 20 foot section. Those are what those are what we call a speed tramps. Yeah, we got that. But I'm riding next to a cop and I'm looking, I'm going, what?
Speaker: he' like oh we got We got that here in Ohio. And it's like that in PA. It's like, I'm driving through town. I see a speed limit sign that says 25 miles an hour. And I'm like, all right, I'll do 30, whatever. And then 15 feet in front of it, it says 55. And I'm like, yeah, which one do I do? What do I do? oh I literally, I was driving down the highway. when i When I moved here, I was driving down the highway and I saw shit like that happen. And I saw a cop next to me. And I was like, what do I do?
Speaker: He's like, just go. I'm like, all right, see ya, bye. He was like, no habla ingre. Yeah, pretty much. we So we have a major highway that I drive every day to work. yeah sha i No. No. We want freeway. That drive every day to work and typically go 10 miles an hour over the speed limit while I'm on that highway. But then once I hit the town or just outside of the town where I work at, I go to the speed limit because there, if you're going even like one mile per hour over, they will move over. We got towns like that here too. I'm talking to you, Utica. Yeah. Good time, Dan, from Utica for speeding.
Speaker: It's mainly because you because full of a bunch of fucking idiot cops who were losers in high school. And then they got a badge and they feel fucking important. So if you go a quarter of the mile, a quarter of a mile over the speed limit, they're like, you usually assholes that stare at there they their speed gun in their radar. No, most most of the time on that highway though, 10 miles per hour over, i I literally, I, I got, the last time I got pulled over, uh, here, I was in the eclipse and I was doing a 130 when I got pulled over. And the cop was like, what are you doing for miles an hour, miles, miles an hour, miles an hour. My car's in miles an hour. I thought I forgot because my car's in a ah Canadian car. So it's got miles an hour on it.
Speaker: And, or no, the, the, the Malibu. No, listen, listen, it was manufactured in, in my, the, the eclipse was manufactured in, in the States. The Malibu was manufactured in and Canada. So on the Malibu, it's in kilometers. Then you get an eclipse is in miles an hour. Okay. Okay. Okay. As a guy who's owned. a lot. of ah My car right now has miles and kilometers. I agree. But, but usually, the our yeah no, but you're going to have miles and kilometers. When you're driving in a country officersers for the
Speaker: When you're driving in a country where kilometers are the main thing, they're the big numbers. The little numbers are your miles. If you're driving in the States, you're your big numbers are your miles an hour and your little numbers. Well, it's reversed on the Eclipse. The Eclipse has the miles an hour big. You go from driving the Malibu that's in kilometers, and you switch to the Eclipse, and it's in miles, and you forget. Until you look down, you're going, oh, I'm only doing 100. I bought a Malibu in the States, and the miles per hour were big numbers, and the kilometers were little numbers. Right. But mine was made in Canada. So what's the difference in your Malibu and every other Malibu? Malibus in the States have, if they're shipped to the States.
Speaker: They have miles an hour. I was made in Canada and in Canada, they have it in kilometers. So it was shipped to Mexico. Well, no, the guy that bought it in Canada drove it, drove it to Cancun and I bought it off of him. That would be a long ass drive. It's not that bad. I did it. I did it from Ohio to Brownsville, Texas, which is at the border in four hours.
Speaker: I drive like Nikki. What are you going to do? but so see come out in a ball i I want to do that so bad. It gives me such a hard time for driving so fast. I've never once been pulled over. Yeah. Start knocking on wood because it doesn't happen in tomorrow. good on drivervis'
Speaker: That's too far to walk. I've got wooden stand right here. No, no, because that's that's that's like the guys that drive motorcycles. I've never laid my motorcycle down. Two minutes later, like I laid my motorcycle. You fucking talked about it, dumbass. i I only laid my bike down one time. I'd like to say I've only done it once. I only, I only did it one time and that was because I was like, the next day he's like, it's for sale. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It was I was like, I just bought these brand new tires. Let me, I was doing a burnout, you know, like, like I was smoking the tire and the back tire popped. It would have popped. It lifted the ass in like two feet off the ground and big guy, you know,
Speaker: to eat off the ground, I was like, whoa, shit. And then it just. Well, you know, like, I've taken quarters too sharply um before the bike did. So I was able to just like, gently put it on the ground. No, I've gone around corners too quick. And I'm like, well, here we go. Like, or you catch gravel or somebody doesn't have their grass properly. You catch that shit. ride we Drive like a grandma on a Sunday morning. So Oh no, I was good. If I'm not hitting every, if i I paid for every gear, I'm going to use it. I paid for the whole speedometer. I'm going to use it. You sound like the asshole that I.
Speaker: Yeah. um I'm pass you doing 90.
Speaker: yeah i get I get passed every day. I'm driving home from work and I'm like, God damn, bro. I'm doing 90 or 85 in a fucking 75. But here's the thing. The first time you speed, you will be pulled over like you fucking read about. Everybody else, they'll never get pulled over. However, I'm also the guy that was on my bike doing 180 miles an hour going, this is kind of crazy because I'm six foot two, lower, almost 300 pounds, and I'm getting lifted off my seat. Oh, yeah. good anything Anything over 150 on a bike, you're shitting yourself. You're not, you're not doing it right. Yeah, I was like, I'm gonna push this bitch to 200, and the fastest I got was 195.
Speaker: hey and i was like like motherfucker Well, yeah, you had the R1. You had the 1 ,000 cc. What was it? I had the R900. Ah. Yeah, that's about max speed on that thing. But I would have said 260. I wanted to push 200, and I got the 195, and that was when I let off of it. because because i was literally I was literally being lifted off of. Yeah, ah football wait the the wind catches you. Yeah, so I was like, let me let me go ahead and let me go ahead and ease up off his throttle for real quick.
Speaker: that that was Yeah. yeah I might've pissed myself. we should pull You get home and be like, so I went, I went one ninety five and which one of you motherfuckers shit in my pants. I got a load. i Out of my friends, I still had the fastest speed. Nobody would go over one fifty and I hit one ninety five and I was like that had I not got lifted off of my bike, I would have kept pushing.
Speaker: So I think that rightfully tells me you're the dumbest of all your friends. No, not necessarily. Because when it comes down to it, once you get used to riding, it's the weirdest concept that very few people understand at first. The faster you go, the more stable the bike is.
Speaker: yeah like like If you lean a little bit, yeah, you're changed lanes. Like, if you're if you're going like four or five miles out, you're going to fall. If you're going 50, 60, you're good at 100, that thing is the fuck smooth as fucking butter. At 160, it starts getting a little sketchy. Anywho. Yeah, we got to wrap up.
Speaker: Appreciate y 'all listening. Appreciate y 'all hanging out. Shout out to the lurkers. Thank you guys. We do appreciate y 'all even though some people, some people feel like we unjustly make fun of you guys, but we do love you guys hanging out and watching and lurking and watching the show. If you're not already, go ahead and check out all the shows. We have a full network of shows, not a network of channels. We're not a weird, delusional old man like Joe Biden. Well, maybe you are quick. I might be. but were He drives like one. not were not We're not a weird delusional old man who thinks that a network is having 114 platforms to tu stream to. We actually have a network of shows, multiple shows, seven days a week, six days a week right now.
Speaker: uh monday's been caring for men men's mental health show tuesday judge garage if it fits in the garage who's got a motor they're gonna talk about it wednesday what the fuck news if it's in the news and it makes you say what the fuck well hopefully we're gonna make you say what the fuck at as well thursday nights just talking shit that's basically what they're doing they're going interviews and hanging out with people and talking shit friday nights is glitz house of music interviews with musicians hanging out, doing what they do, get to know them a little bit better. Saturday nights is this show right here, right here, where you're listening and where you're hearing nonsense, go nonsense. The cornerstone of the network, the nonsense will not work unhinged, unapologetic with the twist. We call it the open door challenge. Drop the link and we tell you guys to come on up in here. If you're willing and able, we just ask you to turn the camera on and put you back her away.
Speaker: And as of right now, that's all we got until Sunday's our film. Hopefully, hopefully, hopefully with the sports show hosted by Jarvis. If not, we'll figure something else out. In the meantime, make sure you guys click that link down there at the bottom. Follow us everywhere at bio dot .link slash nonsense. Well, nonsense, you're going to find it. You're going to find us everywhere. Follow us, like us, love us, share us or hate us and watch us. We do appreciate everybody being here. We appreciate the, uh, chatter's box shot to the chatter's box being engaged by hanging out and, uh, appreciate the replay listeners and everybody out there, whether you're watching the replay of the, uh, live show or you're listening, wherever you listen to podcasts that with that being said, Oh, so what do you want to tell the people before we have before i hit this button?
Speaker: Blake is crazy as fuck. Facts on facts. Missed opportunity, I'm sorry. Yeah, she really did. Jeffrey. Deuces. And the words of the big dog, peep out, eight, count down. Whatever you said, ladies and gentlemen, when you find yourselves at the crossroads of light and like you don't know what you're going to do and where you're going to go, ask yourself one simple question, five letters, five words, W yeah W N N D. What would the nonsensical network do? Well, do 100 % what we would do. So with that being said, be good or be good at it, baby. We'll see you guys next time.
Speaker: Fuck!
