Transcript
Speaker: We're cast out by the devil
Speaker: I got fire in my bones Burning with the black heart And cursed to roam Life with the sunshine It's cold on my face Forbidden food on my tongue It's sweet to the taste You can try and kill me Try and gun me down Shoot your pistol at me
Speaker: I laugh at the sound And as I walk through the valley Of the shadow of death I come out of the valley Where life's shadows fast break
Speaker: baptized in the dirt. And as I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I come out of the valley without shadows as breath. And when safety comes to call, there'll be no fear in my eyes. Let the rainbow come
Speaker: Well there'll be trouble on the rise Well there'll be trouble on the rise
Speaker: What's going on guys welcome to another episode of nonsensical nonsense I'm Glick the other voice you hear and if you're watching this that goofy some bitch below me, that's Jeff. Yes, I am You guys aren't already make sure you give us a follow on Instagram Facebook and the old tick -tock at nonsensical nonsense Follow us on Facebook. You guys can join us live in here
Speaker: And you can check out all of our podcast episodes on Spotify. All you got to do is just search up nonsense, go nonsense. Before we go any further, I do want to give a huge shout out and thank you to BlacktopMojo for allowing us to use their music, which as you guys caught the last episode, you heard a song of theirs at the beginning and at the end of the podcast, much like you'll hear moving forward, you'll get one at the beginning and one at the
Speaker: one at the end of the podcast. So I lost my train of thought. The destructions. Yeah, they can. So what's going on? Some amazing covers. Oh, not much. Well, yeah. Not only do they do some amazing covers, but they also do, um, some, they have some killer original stuff as well. Yeah.
Speaker: Not much is going on, man. I took the day off because my back's been killing me. Uh oh. What did you do to your back? I took the day off just because I didn't want to go in. Well, I tweeted my back last week. Right. I think it's, I guess what they, what they, the sciatic nerve or something like that. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So it's like all the way down my leg. I mean like all the way down my leg and up into my neck.
Speaker: And, uh, you know, um, they decided to fuck me at work Monday and I no longer drive the truck. Now they got me in the warehouse and I told them that I'm not a warehouse guy. So, yeah, no, not going to do it. I don't blame you. That's the reason I will be. Yeah. That's the reason I will be starting my new job probably in the next week or two. So nice.
Speaker: They told me Monday that, uh, they were no longer wanting me in the truck. Wouldn't give me a reason or anything like that. It was just kind of a blindsided slap in the fucking face. But, uh, I was like, Oh, okay. Not my problem. I can fix that. Put in an application with the company. And by the time I got off work Monday, I had an interview set up. So nice took care of all that yesterday evening. And I would move on to the, uh,
Speaker: you know, the whole training and background check and drug tests and all that, all that fun stuff. Go pissing a cup and call today. Yeah. I mean, they made the job offer to me yesterday, uh, probably about 10 minutes into an interview. If that, they offered me the job. You're just the only one that showed up.
Speaker: Probably. Well, it's a pest control job. And unfortunately, like I mentioned in one of the other episodes, I used to work for Oregon Pest Control. So that's kind of the, I mean, that's like the top of the line king of pest control. So that's a nice little thing to have on your resume.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: rodent control, so Yeah, it's at a farm so much. That's easy. Those things are easy since you're in pest control. You know the difference between a fox and a dog What the hell's that got to do with pest control answer the question you know what the difference between Fox and the dog is I Mean Four drinks
Speaker: Well, that's pest control, it's animals. Actually, you know, I didn't, I didn't come up with that joke. That joke is Dean Martin's. I saw a video clip yesterday of Dean Martin saying that. He says, you know, the difference between a
Speaker: uh fox and a dog and he's got a drink in his about three drinks goddamn you went way back into the archives it literally just popped them my feet on facebook and i died laughing i was like that's funny i like that i'm i like the rat pack stuff that sent you that clip of uh
Speaker: I put it on our Facebook page of Sammy Davis Junior mixing that drink. So what you're saying is you like the old days where it was okay to be racist and and slap women around. Is that what you're saying? No, I like the old days when you can smoke and drink anywhere. I don't go anywhere. Well, you know what I mean? I mean, well, that's one of the cool things when I first moved to Cancun is I could walk down the mall smoking a cigarette in the middle of the mall. Yeah, there's a lot of
Speaker: There was a lot of places in Charleston, you could still smoke out. Um, when I first moved down there, but then they took it out of the, like the bars and even the restaurants, when I first moved down there, there were restaurants that you could smoke it. Um, but now they've taken it out of pretty much everywhere. But now everything says this is not a big building. Hmm.
Speaker: I'm like, not outside the front door. Well, I mean, because that's where I'm standing. Yeah, even like college campuses are and they've been this way for years. I mean, they're tobacco free campuses. You can't smoke anywhere on campus. That's ridiculous. When I worked at when I worked at OSU, the one building I worked in, if you went out to the side of the parking lot, there was like a like an island of grass or whatever.
Speaker: that didn't belong to OSU, but it sat right between the medical center building and the OSU police department, but it didn't belong to OSU. I'm not quite sure how that fucking worked out, but that's where we would go smoke at. It was the only place we could smoke over there. So unless you were there in the middle of the night and you just went out on the back patio. I worked for a guy a long time ago and he hated smoking. He thought it was just, oh, it's the devil. And day one, I said, Hey,
Speaker: Bob, where can I smoke? And he grabbed a can of spray paint, went up all the way over by the road and sprayed in a circle. He says, you can stand right there and smoke. I said, all right, fine. I eventually set up an umbrella. I set up an umbrella and a chair right in the middle there. And I'm like, I'm good. Oh, I know.
Speaker: Oh, I ran over all hell's three and a half acres last night today too. Like I was telling you, my wife, I didn't go to work today because well, the company I worked for sucks. It's not that the company sucks. It's, it's, I have no clientele. So my wife went to work and she called me. She says, I think I left my printer and I'm like, Oh, you can't make any sales without a printer. And I look over next to me on the couch and her printer sitting right there and I
Speaker: So I, I had to run it up to her and that's a two hour endeavor, but I got a nice nap on the bus. That was, that was, that would suck to have to just disappear. You know, like you take the day off for whatever reason, then your wife calls you to go to stay two hours. That was my thing. I was like, I'm going to get a ton done. I'm going to get the house clean. I'm going to get some laundry done. We have, when we bought the house, it came with a guarantee that if there's any problem,
Speaker: we call them, we got a guarantee for like a year and a half. And it's been a year and a half. But when it first rained here in the bedroom, there's water on the floor. And I was like, that's weird. And apparently the they didn't seal the roof. So when it rains, water comes down the wall from the ceiling. And we sent them emails and called and nobody answered.
Speaker: Yesterday, we figured out they had moved offices, locations, and we figured out what the office was. Did they change their phone number and email and all that stuff? No, they just, they just didn't, they just never answered. They just said, fuck you. Well, I think, I think the, the number, the number they gave us, they wrote it down wrong. So it was like one number off or something. Yeah. What's going on? Honest mistake. What's up? Hoss.
Speaker: But we went yesterday and we said, look, now we know the year's been up, but we have proof that we've been trying to email and call for the past year. So they got a guy coming over tomorrow to take a look at the problem. And it's a simple fix, but I don't want to pay for it because it's part of the guarantee. They sell this rubberized paint. It's got rubber in it.
Speaker: Yeah, it's like yeah, it's super thick and they just need to paint the roof Do you guys not like single singles on your roof and shit down there? No, no, so they do not is full concrete. It's poured concrete house And you just blocked out jumped off. That's weird There you are. Yeah, it's like full blown concrete
Speaker: Yeah, they literally build a frame out of rebar and like we did when we worked in building trades, it's just poured concrete house. Some of the houses are block, but the house that we bought is a poured concrete house. So they build the forms and all that and pour it in. I was watching them do it at the new section they're doing about a month ago and I was like,
Speaker: When you're working with concrete, concrete's a boss. Working with concrete, concrete's the fucking boss. I sent pictures off to them in the email they sent me of me splashing in the water in my bedroom. Well, it's, it's, it's not, it's only about a quarter inch deep, but what I did, I put in a, I put in a drain.
Speaker: into the floor because there's a slight overhang about a foot where the living room stops and the bedroom goes out another foot. So I figured out where that was in the corner and I drilled a hole to make a drain in the bedroom. So it doesn't flood the entire bedroom floor. It just floods the corner and drains out the drain. So, um, I'm sure that like, well, there's your problem. I'm like, no, that's not the fucking problem, dude.
Speaker: You know, that's not the problem. How come I have a stain? I have a floor stain all the way over by the front by the bedroom door, which is on the opposite side of the room. Yeah, that's not the problem. And why why is the there's a stain on my wall and stuff I have to repaint the bedroom walls once I get it fixed. But they sell they sell it rubberized paint. And basically what I want to do is once they do the roof later on, I'm going to do the entire outside of the house with this rubberized paint.
Speaker: just so that it's 100 % sealed. Yeah, it's a pain in the ass thing, but I'm not gonna pay for it because that's what you're gonna pay for. So that rubberized paint though, isn't that usually like a black paint? So you're gonna have to rethink the whole house after you do that? No, you can get it in five different colors.
Speaker: It's black, red, blue, white, and I think green. The company that makes it is Foster's. No, I have to do white because all the houses in the neighborhood, we have a, it's not an HOA, but it's kind of like everybody wants the houses to look similar because they're cookie cutters. So, you know, if I do it, I'm going to do it white. No big deal. But you can mix, you can add different colors to the white and get
Speaker: The shade you want of like, cause there's, there's like a chocolate brown on spots of the house as well. Accent paints that, uh, I'd have to add some chocolate to it. No big deal. Just to get that match color, but it's, it's just in this bedroom. It's the weirdest thing, but a lot easier to deal with. Yeah, I guess it's a good thing that it's only one spot in your roof. That's leaking, especially if you're getting that much fucking water.
Speaker: leaking down into your bedroom. Yeah. Well, they have, it's the, the roofs aren't pitched either. They're flat roofs. So, and, and there, there, there's a drain on that comes out the wall that just kind of shoots out. It's not connected to anything. It just shoots out like a hose when it rains. And I'm eventually going to rip that off and put in a downspout, but I'm not going to do it until I fix the roof.
Speaker: because they'll, they'll figure out some reason why, Oh, it's your fault that it does this. I don't think so. Yeah. Well, I mean, that's how it always is when you got a warranty on something, as soon as you do the tiniest little thing, they're like, Oh, you avoided the warranty. You jackass. Sorry about your SLO. I mean, it's, it's only, it's only like, I think it's like 200 bucks to paint the roof.
Speaker: and I could probably do it for less if I did it myself. But if it's covered, I'm not going to pay for it. To do the outside of the house will cost me a lot more. Yeah, I mean, that's the thing. If they're going to cover it and actually fix it for you, then why do you need to worry about it? Exactly. And then we have a small leak in the bathroom that leaks into the... They have one section of the kitchen
Speaker: That is drywall And it's where the drain from the the upstairs bathroom is and all that stuff and it's leaked through the drywall And which means it's not the toilet leaking but it's the water from like when the kids take a shower and stuff it goes underneath the toilet and drips there and It's it's a simple fix. But once again, I'm not gonna pay for it. I
Speaker: It's not my problem. God damn it. Well, it's, it is technically my problem, but if it's covered under warranty, I'm not paying for it. Yeah. You know, I mean, it's literally a wax ring and the wax ring itself is like $3. And then you just take the toilet up, put the wax ring down, put the toilet back down and you should be good. Yeah. Yeah. And like I said, simple fix. I could easily do it in, in a matter of an hour.
Speaker: But once again, I don't want to pay for it if it's covered. But yeah, that's all point. That's all point of warranty. I mean, that's like with my car. I bought my car and bumper bumper warranty. I ain't touching anything on it. But, um, speaking of painting stuff. Yeah.
Speaker: Very rarely ever get you to stop talking and I can get into any news stories. Detroit, uh, we're going back to Detroit this week. Hey, uh, Detroit pizzeria owner who was getting pissed off over people getting $150, uh, parking tickets for accidentally parking in a handicap zone in front of his, uh, I guess it's not labeled very well.
Speaker: Okay. In front of his pizzeria. Excuse me. Decided. So I lost my train of thought. People come to Detroit to try to support our city and walk away with $150 ticket. And they feel like they were tricked into it. And they kind of were tricked
Speaker: And they kind of worked and tricked into it, said, Tony Cohen, or Moots pizzeria and bar. Lord, I cannot read tonight. That's okay. I can't read normally. Tony said the last straw was a woman and her children getting ice cream, found a ticket on her car, on their car across the street from, uh, sacrifice pizzeria. I was talking to my buddy sitting with me and I said, we're going to go buy some blue paint. And we did.
Speaker: There's a single sign along the street of the curb indicating that the parking is reserved for drivers with handicapped tab. But Tony said it's confusing because parking enforcers consider the entire fucking street handicapped. So as many as for as many as four vehicles. I mean, that's a good. That's a decent distance. Yeah. So Tony wants to warn drivers not to park there. So he painted the entire.
Speaker: the entire block in front of his, uh, Pizzeria blue to keep them from parking there and getting, uh, fucking Eddie got tickets. I saw that. I actually saw that he actually painted, he actually painted like a car width wide. He didn't just like paint the curb either. Yeah. Yeah. It looks like I didn't read it, but I saw it painted, painted down the road. So, I mean, I wonder how long until old Tony.
Speaker: because he's trying to do a decent thing and be a decent human being, uh, gets taxed. It's really fucked over by the city. Yeah. Well, not even text, but you know, they, they come and find him or some dumb shit like that for, you know, you painted the street without a permit. Yeah. And now we're, now we're losing with Beetlejuice up there running the run in Detroit. That chick looks like Beetlejuice. Like you read about, man.
Speaker: not Beetlejuice, not Michael Keaton Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice from Howard Stern. Oh, tell me I'm wrong. Google that shit. I couldn't. I couldn't even if he was wrong. Is she the mayor of the governor? Her name's Lori Lightfoot, I think.
Speaker: And she looked like Beetlejuice from Howard Stern. If you look up Beetlejuice, Howard Stern, you'll see a picture of this cat. Oh, shit. Did you see it? Yes, she does. Does she not? Yes, she does. Does she look like Beetlejuice? She, you are. She could be that dude's mom or sister or something. Yeah, right.
Speaker: I was going to, I was going to be trying to find words to be nice, but I, it's impossible to be nice. I mean, yeah, I feel bad for the chick for looking like that, but damn. Yeah. Right. She, uh, she got some unfortunate genes there. Oof. Yeah. You wake up next to that. You want to just chew your arm off so you don't have to wake it up. That's a coyote ugly for sure. Amen to that.
Speaker: Yeah. You know, you know, they'll try to find some way to fuck old Tony because the, the, the article's title was man paints blue to save people green. And the city of Detroit is going to be like, listen, you're messing with our income. That's not cool. And he'll end up having to go to court.
Speaker: Oh, and it's going to cost a court. I don't know if we'll have to go to court, but you know, I'm sure there'll be some kind of fines or a penalty or rather than he'll have to pay. He'll have to pay to have the paint removed or covered up or, you know, some take dumb shit like that. Speak speaking of painting the street. And I would just be like, yeah, go ahead. You know, if,
Speaker: If I was him, I'd fight back and be like, well, make it a little bit clearer that handicap parking, the spots are, the spots are properly labeled. You know, they're not going to put one sign up and expect everybody in their brother to know that the next five parking spaces are all.
Speaker: handicap fucking for handicrippled and 90 and I would probably say 75 % of the people with a handicap sticker aren't even fucking handicap. They're just lazy pieces of shit. Yeah, exactly. There's a lot of motherfuckers that it doesn't take. No, yeah. Right. I can get one because I'm so I'm short. That's I'm I'm I'm I'm
Speaker: almost directly challenged. Yeah, there you go. That's a nice way to say it. But speaking of painting the street, I saw a TikTok the other day because I tend to scroll through TikTok like mad. And I saw a video that said that you could cut down the cost of electricity in cities by painting the streets white and lower the city's carbon footprint. Now, here's my problem with this.
Speaker: painting the streets white Because black absorbs Sun and white would reflect it So it would cut down on on the the nearby buildings have to use an AC and all that blah blah supposedly but here's my problem with that car tires are black and My dumbass would see a white street and like oh, this is burnout territory number one. I
Speaker: But number two, to keep the street clean, you'd have to repaint it every couple months. You'd have, yeah, you'd have to reclaim it. You'd have to hire more street cleaners. The offset of making the white paint would use just as much carbon than just leaving the streets alone. I am not the smartest man in the world. And that doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me that if you're reflecting the sun from your white streets,
Speaker: into buildings that are already mainly made up of glass windows. Right. You're going to force more heat into the buildings, which I mean, like I said, I'm not the smartest person. It just doesn't make a whole lot of sense. It seems like it makes sense to me more problems than issues. It doesn't seem like it's very right. Well, it's friendly.
Speaker: That's the problem with eco people. They don't think of the other things. They think, oh yeah, if it's white, well, how much carbon does it take to make white paint? And a lot of white paint, too. I mean, think of all the roads that are better in this country. Even a small city like Lexington, you're talking thousands of gallons.
Speaker: And they're talking, like, oh, if you did New York. You're live on the podcast. Hey. Jeff said hey. Jeff said hey. Our first caller. Yeah, first caller. She could only hear one of us, but that's OK. She don't need to hear you. Yeah, I'm on it.
Speaker: Our first caller, it was purely accidental. We need to figure out how to set that up too. That'd be kind of cool. People call in when they're two cents. Well, that would be actually pretty cool if we could figure out a way to get live callers in. I found another app. I didn't know what time you got off.
Speaker: Yeah, go ahead. Jeff was out of it. I was talking to that. Yeah, you're talking to Summer. I get it. I found another app that we might use, but I don't know if we give it streams to multiple things. I'm going to play with it. I think the biggest thing is that I need to get a mixing board, and then we'd be able to do a bunch of different things with that on my end.
Speaker: Yeah. This stuff costs money. We got to get Bud Light to sponsor us first. Bud Light presents two idiots that aren't geniuses. And I deserve a St. Louis, Missouri. Right? You need to get a job and help put money into the podcast. Amen to that.
Speaker: That's why that's why uh, i'm actually trying to switch companies because the company i'm working for i'm not making any money I made 50 bucks in two weeks That's not that's not a lot Yeah, that's not um That's not very good. Yeah, I figure I figure it could probably cost me 15 20 bucks just to get back and forth
Speaker: Would you guys, you guys happen to do like taxi or Uber or whatever back and forth? Yeah, we can. We can. Um, like I said, last week we had, uh, one of our friends that was going to the hotel. Uh, I have two cars, neither one of them work because they both need work, which I need money to fix. So, you know, but, uh, her car works perfectly and she's going to the hotel anyways. So we're catching ride with her.
Speaker: But when we were getting done, you know, you take a bus or two buses or a bus and a taxi and it was like, ah, you know, it's not that, not that taxis are expensive here. I think they're like three bucks. I'd say it's a whole lot cheaper down there than what it is up here. Well, at the end of the day, that stuff still adds up, but you also got to remember I'm making Cancun money, not US money. True.
Speaker: Yeah. Once again, I can live on $1 ,500 a month comfortably. On two grand a month, I live like a king. Yeah, but I mean, that would have to be American money though, right? Yeah, two grand American. I can live like a fucking king.
Speaker: Well, how do you get paid American down there? That's the thing. Okay. If I tell you in pesos, you'd be like, what? So, uh, two grand. Yeah. But I'm just saying like, so, so like, if you win, so $1 is 20 pesos. So two grand is 40 ,000 pesos. So if I get, when I get paid, I get paid in pesos and to tell you what I make,
Speaker: Would have to convert it in dollars so you understand because if I tell you I make 50 ,000 pesos you like that's nice. How much is that? What does I'm saying like so when you go get a job down there? So just I'm just saying like for instance McDonald's I'm not saying you're working at McDonald's, but do they pay you like? Now you get paid in pesos Yeah, you get paid 500 pesos an hour No, they actually everything down here is salary. I
Speaker: So regardless how many hours you put in, you make X amount. You put in five hours, you're still making the same amount as if you put in 20 hours. Everything's salary. It's, it's smart on the, the, the companies, but it sucks for the employee. Yeah, that would, that would, so if, if, if your salary, I don't know, man, I'm not even trying to figure it out or trying to fucking well, it all comes down to, um, you know,
Speaker: People that work at McDonald's, you'll never see a major adult my age unless they're a manager and making about $1 ,500 to $2 ,000 a month. But the real money is in timeshare and commission jobs, timeshare, selling tours, renting cars,
Speaker: selling tickets to the clubs and you know stuff like that that's where the money is which is what i do i actually sell the tours so for instance if but once again that's where the u .s dollar comes in uh depending on what company i work for if i tell you it's 150 and you hand me 150 my commission comes out 150 it doesn't convert into pesos first you know i mean so you get like if it costs me 100 bucks
Speaker: cost me a hundred bucks, but I charge you 150. The company makes $25. I make $25 take home. Yes. And then the tour operator gets the hundred. So, um, that's basically how it works. So if you paid me in pesos, it wouldn't be $150. It would be, um, 20, you know, it'd be like 3 ,500 pesos.
Speaker: give or take 3750 something like that. But the value of that is $150. It's complicated, but once you get used to it, it's simple. After 20 years, it's just after 20 years, you just it's it's normal, you know, the nice thing is like every time my wife and I get dollars, we save our dollars because
Speaker: One day, the dollar exchange rate changes. So I might get, if I make $100 in US, I wait until the dollar to peso is 20 or above before I exchange that money into pesos. Yeah, it fluctuates. My mom was talking about, when I first moved down here, it was 10 pesos to one.
Speaker: And she said, I wish I would have taken a bunch of US dollars and left it there in pesos. And when it dropped down to like eight pesos, switch it back over to dollars, because then you actually make money. And if you take pesos when it's, or if you take dollars when it's 25 to one, you switch it over, you actually make money. It's complicated, but once you figure it out, it's actually really easy.
Speaker: I'm just going to stay in the States. Yeah, pretty much. That's, that would be my recommendation. But like I said, it's one of those things, once you figure it out, I mean, you basically, uh, you, for instance, if you got a hundred bucks, that's 2000 pesos. So you double it, you double it at a zero.
Speaker: Double out of zero and you have what it is in pesos It gets complicated was not 15 and stuff. You can't do in your head as fast But that's why phones have calculators Yeah, well speaking of money and maybe this isn't as boring as us talking about pesos the dollars conversion rates So a one a bottle of wine that went to space is up for sale and
Speaker: Oh my gosh. It's got a price tag. It's got a price tag on it. How much do you think this bottle of? It is a bottle of and not that any of us or either one of us are wine experts, but it's a Pinterest 2000. So it was harvested in 2000. Yep. And it's a French wine. Okay. In France. Well, what do you think? Okay.
Speaker: Well, excluding the whole France thing, I've never heard of it, excluding the whole space thing. I've never heard of the brand. So I'd say a normal bottle, a normal bottle would be about a hundred bucks. So since I went to space, call it two grand. Okay. You're just a, just a smidge off 20 grand. Well, here, here, just a little bit off. What?
Speaker: The line is out of this world. The price is appropriately stratospheric. Christine said, I'm assuming Christine's is who's selling this bottle of wine. Christie's Tuesday. Christie's whatever. Christie's is an auction house. Oh, is that okay? Yeah, it's an auction house in New York. Fancy.
Speaker: Yeah. But anyways, Tuesday, it is selling a bottle of French wine that spent more than a year in orbit aboard the International Space Station. Oh, but there it says the auction house thinks the wine connoisseur may pay as much as a million dollars to own it. Get the fuck out of town. I'm actually going to I'm still here. I'm just putting my phone on site to my batteries not charging. So you can't see me, but you can hear me. So so the bottle was one or 20.
Speaker: a million dollars. This was actually yes. It was one of 12 bottles set into space in 2000 or in November of 2019 by researchers exploring the potential for extraterrestrial agriculture. I don't know why you would take wine to space for agricultural research. But again, I'm not the smartest man in the world. But here's what it changed the flavor. I would imagine with that
Speaker: atmospheric changes and everything like that, that the flavor and all that good stuff would definitely change. But it returned 14 months later. That was gonna be my next question. Slightly altered according to wine experts who sampled it at a tasting in France. So they had 12 bottles that went there and they tasted it when it came back. Tim Tiptree, International Director of Christie's Wine and Spirits Department said,
Speaker: the space age wine was mature in a unique environment of near zero gravity aboard the space station. This bottle was typically a $10 ,000 bottle of wine. Holy crap. Known for its complexity, silky rape, tannions, and flavors of black cherry cigar box and leather. Who wants to fucking drink wine that tastes like a cigar box and leather? And leather.
Speaker: Well, here's the crazy thing. You could give me a $2 ,000 glass of wine and a $2 glass of wine. I couldn't tell you which one was which. You could give me either one. I'd dump them out and say, give me a Budweiser. Give me a beer and call it. Don't put this shit in front of me again. That's crazy. What am I, a little kid? Give me a real drink.
Speaker: What a grape juice. I call Welch's. That's crazy. Another thing that's crazy price is those, you know what TFNs are?
Speaker: Yeah. So, um, that, that cyber shit that they're doing now, like a lot of sports teams and shit are doing it where you can buy. Yeah. Like they'll, they'll, I don't know how they do it, but it's like, it's a video slip. It's literally just a video clip of. Yeah. Like, but how they take everything off the internet where only one person can still get it. It's, it's, you get the original.
Speaker: It's like owning the copy. I don't need to be original. That's the thing. I have seen that. Do you remember? The Cleveland Cavaliers made their championship run. LeBron James had this block. I think it was Draymond Green, one of the guys on a fast break.
Speaker: LeBron ran the full length of the court like fucking the flash and jumped up and smashed the ball up against the backboard to block the shot. Everybody's seen it a million times. It's probably one of the greatest plays ever. And that series was awesome because the cows were down. And it sold for $64 ,000. But here's the crazy one. Have you seen, you remember the gif?
Speaker: That's a cat with rainbow coming out of his ass. It's cartooned Yeah, probably that sold as a tfn for 84 000 Yeah, I I mean the tfns that I I understand more about are like these artists that are doing like Digital artwork and stuff like that. I mean you sell that and that's a war kind or or artists or djs that are making music Why you would only want to do a one -off, but I guess if you're
Speaker: you know, a super famous, uh, DJ, like what's, what's, what's his name? Mushroom, uh, marshmallow. Yeah. Marshmallow guy. Yeah. Well, the first, the first ever tweet, the first ever tweet just sold two days ago for $3 million. Yeah. I heard about that. And I was like, what? I need to get up on this. You know, I'll sell some shit.
Speaker: I saw a picture of me waving. Nobody will pay for it. I'll get a buck. We'll get a buck to get off the internet. I'll take it. I'll delete it for an hour. Well, there's a guy. There's a guy. He's, he's a, he, he thought of the reverse only fans. This is genius. He's going to select random people.
Speaker: and just send them dick pics until they pay him to stop. I was like, that's what I need to do. That is that is that is first of all, that's sexual assault and a cyber crime. And this guy's going to end up on a list. But I was like, but I was like, that that's literally the opposite of OnlyFans.
Speaker: Yeah, that already exists, though. I mean, that guy's not doing it. I mean, guys said unsolicited dick pics all the time. Constantly. They go into a girls deal. They're like, hey, and the girl's like, hey, they're like, pow, pow. What the hell? Jesus Christ! Give me two dollars, and I'm going to get a kid to send you more. People are dumb. There's a lot of money in that only fans, too.
Speaker: There really is. And the thing is, is that, I mean, you know, you don't have to get naked on there. And there's a section just for feet, dude. My brother, my brother and I were talking about it and we're like, we're going to do it. Fans are like an only fans. It's just going to be two fat, bearded guys sitting around making fun of people. Yeah. And so, you know, there's going to be people out there that are going to want to pay for that because they're weird.
Speaker: There's a chick in the UK. She's making 10 ,000 pounds. So, you know, British pounds a month showing her feet. Well, I mean, foot fetish isn't nothing, nothing new or nothing, nothing strange. I told my wife, I said, you know what? You got some pretty feet. I'm not a foot guy, but I might just make an OnlyFans just take a bunch of pictures of your feet.
Speaker: because nobody wants to see my feet, but my wife says my feet are hobbit feet. She's like, nobody wants to see your hobbit feet. I can believe that you're built like a hobbit. She's like, nobody wants to see your hobbit feet. I said, no, but I'll wait till you're asleep. I'll take pictures of your feet. Started only fast.
Speaker: Well, a guy I did work on his house. He, he, we're friends on Facebook, which is how he contacts me when he needs work done on his house. And he's got this really nice fucking house and everything, lives in a really rich neighborhood.
Speaker: And he's always putting, you know how you do your status videos or whatever. He's always putting up these videos or him leaving Gucci and stuff. And he's got a security guard with him because he's bought so much stuff. And I asked me, I said, I said, dude, what the hell do you do? He's like, I got an OnlyFans. I'm like, so chicks are paying you? He's like, no, it's a bunch of gay guys, but I don't care. They're paying. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, you know, you know on Facebook you have your your your What's it wasn't called? Uh, I put one up your story Your stories. Yes. Thank you. Yeah But yeah, he puts he's constantly putting pictures of his you know a picture that he'll put on to Like a before picture
Speaker: for his only fans, which is what I found out when I talked to him the other day. He's I've put the before picture on my store, on my stories. And then people can go on my only fans and see the after. I'm like, wait, what? I said, dude, not to be weird, but in your, in your stories, you're wearing a thong. What's the after? He's like, I take the thong off. I'm like, all right. I won't be doing that. I'm like, all right, I gotta go. I'm late for anything.
Speaker: Well, and that's that's the other thing man. Like it kills me. Uh yeah, these girls and and guys are just as bad about it. Oh, join my man on my only fans. Uh you know, so you can see blah blah blah and it's like or I can or I can look up for that.
Speaker: Yeah. Or I can go to X hamper hamster and see whatever the fuck twisted shit I can come up with today that I want to look at. And it's free. I was looking on Reddit to post links to the podcast, which is not easy because they have the, each, each feed or whatever has different rules. Like only certain days you can post the link. And I was like, Oh, this is too much to pay in the ass. But.
Speaker: There's section upon section upon section of people promoting their OnlyFans where it's like, okay, I've seen this picture. I don't need to see your OnlyFans because I see everything. Yeah. I don't, I don't understand Reddit. I had Reddit for a little bit. I don't even know what I downloaded it for something. And I just, I don't understand how that fucking
Speaker: Site been up forever. Yeah, it's been it's been up forever. I just don't I just don't understand like how to post on it or I know what I downloaded reddit because They have a lot of sports pages and oh yeah, you can stream sports and stuff for free Okay Well, it's like I I joined reddit I I downloaded reddit just so I could promote the YouTube channel my YouTube channel and
Speaker: And, you know, it took me three days before I get up a post that, that wasn't banned because I didn't follow the quote unquote rules. I'm like, well, where's the rules? They don't show you the rules. It's not like when you've joined a Facebook fan page like ours, you know, you'd have to read the rules. Well, when you join one on Reddit, the rules don't pop up. You just, it just says, will you follow the rules? And you're like, yeah, okay.
Speaker: And then they're like, Oh, you didn't follow the rules. So we can't put up this post. I'm like, well, where's the rules? Where are the rules that say I can't do this or I can't do that. And I thought when we started the podcast, I was like, you know what? I'll put a link up on Reddit and I've tried like nine times and I keep breaking rules. So I'm like, fuck Reddit. Well, yeah, I do.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: I constantly get get tweet updates because I follow
Speaker: I follow certain political parties, I would guess is the best way to put it. And I literally don't even open them. I just read what pops up and I'm like, yeah, okay, swipe left. So it goes away. I don't actually go into Twitter and actually read the, read the full tweet. I read the headline. I'm like, yeah, I get it. I get the gist. Well, that's the nice thing about like now with us doing this and I created the Twitter page for it. I only, I only followed so far.
Speaker: like other podcasts and stuff like that. Right. And and then like some radio people that I like and and whatnot. So you don't you don't get too much garbage like that. Right. On your notifications. But. Well, yeah, it's it's speaking of speaking of politics and.
Speaker: you know, they like to, they like to rig shift. So I got, I got, I got a story about something being rigged here. Go for it. We're leaving the great state of Michigan and we're going to go down to Florida. Oh, here we go. Florida news. Florida team charged as an adult
Speaker: in rigged homecoming election. This chick down in Pensacola, this chick, her and her mom, her mom was like the principal of the school. And they went on to the computer and they rigged the election so that she would be the homecoming queen. Nice.
Speaker: some of
Speaker: When she was arrested in March, she turned 18 and it just, she just turned 18 here. Uh, back in April, the state's attorney office and, uh, a scambi county, sorry, Florida for Tuesday that Grover will be tried as an adult. Grover and her mother, Laura rose Carol 50 face multiple felony charges stemming from the October homecoming vote at Tate high school, Pensacola.
Speaker: While employed, she was the assistant principal at Bellevue Elementary School in the same county. Carol Assert assessed. Words are hard. Access. I'm not even drinking.
Speaker: I mean, I am, but hell, I only had two. Access the school district's internal system to cast fraudulent votes for our daughter. So she would win. Officials said that the investigation began in November when the school district reported unauthorized access into hundreds of students' accounts, according to the Florida Department of Law Enforcement. So had they just like, back in the day when we was in school,
Speaker: do you have your ballot box with paper? yeah yeah you just had your stupid ballot that you check check check check check whatever but it wouldn't have been that big of a deal but the fact that they went online accessed other students accounts and placed the votes now they're facing all these charts just so she could
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. I wish they would have had a picture of her because I'd really like to know what this chick looks like. Like a bridge troll or something. You know, why did your mom? Looking back homecoming and prom. Yeah. Nobody gives a shit about that stuff. Not now. I mean, 21 years, you can't go, Oh,
Speaker: back in 1998 in the 1900s. Yeah. I was, I was a homecoming king. So can you put that on your fucking resume? No, you cannot. Is that going to get you a job or is it going to help you? Well, my, my thing is this is like, I remember my guidance counselor said, Oh, you're going to wake up one day and regret not going to your prom. I'm like, no, I won't.
Speaker: I went to my girlfriend's prom at the time and I looked at a, somebody posted a picture on Facebook the other day of them at prom back in 2000. I'm like, I didn't miss anything. Yeah. I went to a party prom night. I actually went, like I said, I went to my girlfriend's prom and then afterwards we stayed the night at a friend's house. Yeah. I think, I think, I think I might, I might've went to my girlfriend's prom.
Speaker: in high school, but I don't remember. I have my ex wife because when we started dating, she was still in high school. I went to her, her senior prom with her. Right. Um, but, uh, yeah, it's just like, I mean, the only thing I look forward to to prom was I worked to use car dealership and the boss and I were really good friends. So prom, I got to take the coolest car in the lot to prom. So he's like,
Speaker: Proms tomorrow, right? I'm like, yeah, he's like, pick one. I'm like, sweet dude. You know, so when I went to prom, I went, I took a, uh, uh, what was it? Uh, I took a Mitsubishi eclipse, actually the first one. And then the second one, I took a Porsche. Yeah. Cause that was cool. Cause it was there. It was a portion. We, we went, I don't remember where we went, but we went, uh,
Speaker: like driving through the road, through the mountain, not mountains, but, you know, back, back roads. It was all curvy and shit. Oh man. That thing handled like a dream. First and only time I've ever driven a Porsche that I was like, yeah, I might want one of these, but I don't have. Trying to, uh, fit my big ass into a Porsche. Yeah, actually the newer ones are really roomy. The older ones are kind of like they're Volkswagen's basically.
Speaker: Yeah. I mean, well, Porsche has like SUVs and stuff like that now. So, uh, but I was talking about like, uh, like a Porsche 9 11 or something, which I absolutely love the car. I absolutely love the car. I absolutely, one of my foreign sports cars, but you know, I don't think that I could fit into one too comfortably. I could fit in it. I'm just saying, I don't think it would be comfortable. Well, how tall are you?
Speaker: 62 You can drive it Yes, but but I had a buddy he was 6 6 and He wanted to buy a convertible so bad and he went and bought one Got in it to drive it and He couldn't see out the windshield. He was staring at the the top of the windshield Sold it the next day. He was so Yeah
Speaker: So you would literally be looking out, you know, how you got that blue eyebrow on top of a windshield. You'd be looking through that. Well, yeah, that's like, you know, years ago, I had an older Sunfire that I got for next to nothing. And it was it was a cool little car, but it was the convertible. Yeah.
Speaker: When you drop the top, like from my forehead up, stuck over the windshield. I was making fun of her. I was making fun of my wife's friend the other day because she sits with the bottom of the steering wheel touching her stomach. And I was like, you're not that short. She's like, no, but this is how I drive. And I'm like, shit, you'd never go. You'd think I was 6 '12", the way I drive.
Speaker: Because my wife's like, Yeah, he does the whole Detroit lean thing. I'm like, Oh, yeah. I leaned so far back. I'm laying down. You can barely see I look like a little blue haired old lady. You're looking over the steering wheel. I am. No, but I like to, you know, I don't, I don't lean back like I did in high school. I don't do it like I do in high school. But, you know, if long as my foot will reach the pedal through the floor, I sit there.
Speaker: Drive it around with your little gangster lead. But also, I don't like to sit on the hood while I drive. Yeah. I like sitting in the back seat. What do you do? Put stilts on so you can reach the pedals? Well, see, that's the one advantage. That's the one advantage of being short. There's not a vehicle out there that I can't drive. I mean, I'm sure there's a vehicle out there you can't drive.
Speaker: I think you would have had issues driving my Bronco. The seat didn't, you didn't have much room to play with the seat. Oh, well, you know, you sit on the front of the seat.
Speaker: No, no, you just scootch all the way forward scootch all the way forward so that you can't touch the back and that's where you get that's why you do the Detroit lean. Yeah, you don't do it for comfort. You do it to reach the pedals. I need some two by fours and I can cut them in blocks. Dude from Indiana Jones. Time to my feet, man. We'll rock this out.
Speaker: Well, if I really was desperate, I could get that handicap thing where you actually, it actually, they're, they're bars. One it's, it's, you push them like buttons, but they're actually bars. One goes to the pedal. One, one goes to the gas pedal. One goes to the brake.
Speaker: Yeah, I know what you're talking about. I've seen those before, like the handicap beds and stuff, but I mean, there are advantages and disadvantages to be short and or tall. Like, like me, for instance, my, my apartment, when I first moved in here, um, you know, I came and looked at the apartment and I just kind of looked at it like, okay, this will do, you know, whatever. I didn't realize that I moved in that
Speaker: my shower head. It comes to my chest. It hits me in the chest. I've got to squat down to wash my hair and my beard and stuff. And I'm like, this is some bullshit. I have the exact opposite problem. The light bulb went out in this room.
Speaker: right before we started doing the podcast where I was doing it from this room. And I was like, well, I'll just stand on the bed and change it. Nope. I had to literally set a chair on the bed, have my wife hold the chair so I can stand on the chair to change the light bulb. Well, fortunately, most of my light bulbs in my apartment, I can literally just reach up and I've got like the boobies on my ceiling. So I would just twist the nipple off.
Speaker: I can unscrew the light bulb just standing flat footed. So the difference is I have 12 foot ceilings too. Every room is a 12 foot ceiling. Even here upstairs. Oh yeah. Which doesn't make sense because in general Mexicans aren't that tall. So it's kind of, it's kind of weird.
Speaker: But yeah, this room that I'm sitting in easily 12 foot ceiling. Well, you know, what you said, that goes back to you saying your house is concrete. So they had the port walls and everything like that. And it's probably just all about, it was probably cheaper to buy forms that were 12 foot tall. Yeah. Rather than having special made forms. Well, and the walls are only four inches thick too.
Speaker: You say only, but that's fucking four inches of concrete. Like my house that I live in, my part is that I live in the buildings all breaking concrete. Like my walls, with the exception of the interior walls, they're all concrete. Right. So, you know, it's kind of the same concept, but just because the building's so fucking old, but
Speaker: It's the same time a tornado could come through and I can sit on my second floor apartment and watch it and be like, I do the same thing for hurricanes. I'm like, yeah, normal day. Hurricanes crack me up down here. You know, uh, I grew up with, you know, you, where you are. So tornadoes, stuff like that. And I'm like, yeah, whatever. And hurricane came around. I'm like, Oh, this is going to be awesome. And my girlfriend at times, like, what are you retarded? I'm like, no, this is going on.
Speaker: We went through the biggest hurricane in history, Hurricane Wilma. There's the F rating, F1, F2, all the way. And they wanted to rate it an F6. Yeah, they wanted to rate it an F6 because it came in as an F5 and then sat here for two days.
Speaker: the hurricane literally sat on Cancun for two days and Yeah, it's the same one but it got the same one It was no, it wasn't the same one that broke the levees I Don't think yeah, no, I mean I
Speaker: That's how I was when I moved to Charleston because, you know, they got much, much like Florida and whatnot Charleston being on the coast. They get the hurricanes and stuff like that. And I could not wait for my first hurricane. And the crazy thing about Charleston, I mean, outside of Hugo, which everybody knows that came through in the 89, 90 or something like that, that just fucking completely devastated Charleston. I mean, they still talk about it today. Um, the hurricanes would come up.
Speaker: But if you were to look on a map at Charleston, it sits in a pocket. So when you're coming up the coast, there's a dip in, and it comes back out where Charleston sits. And they always had these, oh, man, this category three, category four, oh, my god, this is going to be devastating, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada. And then it would completely miss us. When Hurricane Matthew came up,
Speaker: or came to me. Unfortunately, my ex wife, she worked in the hospital, so she had to stay, but my kids and I went up to Charlotte and got a hotel and everything like that and the hurricane
Speaker: outside of rain and stuff, completely miss Charleston and fucking smack right into Charlotte. Now, Charlotte's inland quite a bit. So, right. But it's pretty smart. And yeah, it's smack right into Charlotte. And I'm like, we we've left to get away from this some bitch and walked right into it.
Speaker: Meanwhile, down in Charleston, where like my wife and some of our friends and stuff who stayed, they had rain and there was some flooding and stuff like that. And then there was another one time that, you know, hurricane was going to come through, everybody get the fuck out. And I'm like, I'm not fucking leaving. But because of the kids, we actually send them up to Ohio. It was, it worked out better because we were already planning a trip to Ohio anyways. And, uh,
Speaker: What's going on, Colorado? I'm missing comments on, uh, yeah, I saw that. But, um, but, uh, my ex wife and I, we, we wound up staying and it just rained. Like it was like a thunderstorm, like a really bad thunderstorm. Yeah. And then, you know, shit was flooded, but we, we, like the next day we went out to dinner and was walking, like there was a lot of flooding, but it wasn't nothing crazy. I'm like, man.
Speaker: I'm all I wanted was a hurricane. Like, I want to hang out during the hurricane. Right before I left, there was supposed to be a really bad one that just smoked fucking Myrtle Beach in that area and completely missed us. And I'm like, damn it. I carried all my electronics from the from the first floor up to the second floor. Got everything out of the garage that I was worried about being damaged and nothing happened. Well,
Speaker: Actually, the the funny thing is everybody freaks out right before a hurricane and Generators go people go crazy buying generators. I actually don't buy a generator. I actually bought a cigarette lighter extension Yeah, and and I have an inverter that plugs in the cigarette lighter so I can plug my fridge into it And I just start the car yeah and
Speaker: You know, I have to move the fridge close to the front door, but no big deal. But, uh, during Wilma, I did that. My neighbors thought I was a genius. And, uh, I ended up running out of gas in the car because it was so long. So the power eventually went out and I'm like, shit, I got all this food in the fridge. So I went out in the backyard, which is a, it was, you know, four walls with no roof. And I lit my barbecue and just cooked on the barbecue.
Speaker: Yeah, I cooked up steaks and stuff on the barbecue in the middle. I think somewhere on my Google Cloud or there's a picture of me during Wilma wearing a building trade shirt, which I thought was funny, wearing a building trade shirt, flipping burgers in the middle of a hurricane.
Speaker: I'm like, welcome to Cancun. Yeah, that was like that guy that was out in Florida when the hurricane came through and he was out in swim trunks with the American flag standing in the street in the fucking hurricane that was just ripping through and he's like. And he's head banging. Yeah.
Speaker: I read a story of this guy. The hurricane was coming. He wanted to prove that he was a man. And he was like 70 years old. He's like, I'm going to show you that hurricanes aren't that bad. He's like, I'm going to tie myself to a tree, tether myself to a tree and stand in the middle of a hurricane. And my first thought was, it's not the wind that will hurt you. It's the debris.
Speaker: It's everything that's why you know and he ended up getting hit by a piece of Corrugated steel It flew off a shed it didn't hurt him but it it liked the the the widest part, you know the the center of
Speaker: You know, it's four by eight sheet smacked him right in the face. I'm like, you're idiot. But yeah, that the only reason I barbecued during the hurricanes guy, I had to move my gas tanks in the house because the wind was so bad. The gas tanks, I had two gas tanks and they're clanging up against each other. And I was like, I think I'm gonna move those.
Speaker: Yeah, I would have just, I would have just thrown them up in the air and seen what happened. If you're probably out in your neighbor's head generator and you were out there cooking, you should have been like, Hey y 'all, come grab some food, man. I was the only one in the complex that we lived in that had power because I was running off the car and my girlfriend had a car at the time and I had my beetle.
Speaker: And I literally wired that thing up to the battery and I started that beetle and that beetle, you know, it doesn't use a lot of gas, but after two days of half a tank, it killed gas tank. Yeah. It doesn't take up, but I mean, it will eventually, you know, but it's going to eventually run after, after about when it, when the eye came, the eye of the storm,
Speaker: I actually moved the two cars around. I pushed the beetle out and put her car there and wired up the, so I could put battery, put power back to the fridge and the TV. Cause I had the TV layer rocking and the TV rolling. But that, that apartment was bad because the, the seal on the window, I had a beach towels underneath the window that I still had to squeegee water out the front door.
Speaker: in that apartment. Oh, it was terrible. But where I live now, I'm so far away from the ocean that we had a hurricane last year and got wood and everything, boarded up the windows, completely pointless. Now, um, you know, you're talking about like generators and whatnot. Yep.
Speaker: years ago. I mean, this has been almost 17 years ago. Um, it was right before my oldest daughter was born. We had a really bad ice storm. And, uh, you know, I mean, we had, it was, I mean, probably it went through four and six inches of ice everywhere. And, um,
Speaker: my, my ex and my ex wife and I were staying with my sister and my brother -in -law while we were waiting on our apartment to be finished. We were going to move into a new apartment, but of course, you know, you got to flip it and we're painting the walls and cleaning all this other shit. Yeah. That ice storm came through, man. And we was watching, uh, they kind of lived out in the country a little bit, but we was watching transformers. They did look like the fourth of July. Them sons of bitches were popping like crazy. Uh,
Speaker: you know, thankfully, he had a generator. So we were like, on their on their road, they're either five or six houses or whatever. But we were the only one that had any form of electricity, because of a damn generator. And I when I buy a house, that's going to be the first thing I do is get a generator and have it hardwired right to the house because you never know what you do is you buy it. You buy a used diesel tractor.
Speaker: And there's wire generator transmission to it and call it a day. There you go. Because it's probably saved because that way you got a big diesel generator run the entire house. Well, they make so many different kinds of generators. Oh, yeah. That you can wire. I mean, they sit outside.
Speaker: And they're quiet, you know, and they're hard, they're hard lined right into your house. So as soon as the power goes, much like these big office buildings and stuff like that, yeah, they automatically, uh, swaps, they swap over. Well, uh, Cancun's weird when, when they know a hurricane's coming about three hours before it hits land, they kill the power to the whole town. Really? Yeah. Well, it's, it's preventative.
Speaker: because most of the town, with the exception of like 17 neighborhoods, well, my mind being one of them, all lines are above and it's a rat's nest of wire. It's not a pretty sight. So if a pole drops or a transformer blows, somebody's going to get hurt. So they're like, well, we'll just kill the power of the whole town.
Speaker: And then once the hurricanes over, they drive around and look for the broken transformers. Look, okay, let's fix that one. Fix that one. We'll turn the power back on and they turn it back on in sections. It's, it's, it's smart, but it's also, it's a pain in the ass because like, I'm not going to lose power because of a pole went down in my area, but they'll kill my power. Well,
Speaker: I mean, it's smart in a sense, but it's a pain in the ass for, for those of you guys who have to have to deal with it. But I was scrolling through and he had sent me this, uh, he had sent me this, uh, story earlier. And, uh, maybe, maybe if I can get it to cooperate with me.
Speaker: I don't remember what the story was about now. The mannequin. Oh, yes. That was hilarious. I didn't read the article, but I thought it was the title was funny. Yeah. So police were called out after a mechanic. Words are hard. Words are hard.
Speaker: Well, I'm not talking. That's going to be our new solution. Words are hard. Words are nonsensical nonsense. Words are hard. Police were police were called out after a mechanic. I'm still going to say it. Man Mannequin is mistaken for a human. They were called out to a restaurant accused of breaching coronavirus regulations after the mannequin was set at a table.
Speaker: it was mistaken for a human. Now, this isn't Nova Scotia. So some of these countries like went into complete lock down. That's Canada. Yeah, but you know, here in the States, we're like, we're gonna lock down. But unless you're an essential employee, or unless you're blah, blah, blah, dah, dah, dah, dah, you know, we're gonna make exceptions. But they have like strict ass rules. It's like in England.
Speaker: I know they completely locked them fuckers down. Nobody was doing anything. I think they were given like a two hour a day where they were able to go to the grocery store or go to the doctor or pick up prescriptions. But outside of that, they were in their fucking houses. That's crazy.
Speaker: Uh, police were, uh, called out to a restaurant amid reports of coronavirus, locked out violations. And they discovered that the supposed illegal customer was actually, uh, let's see if I can say the word mannequin. Mike, uh, call me a, call me a.
Speaker: owner of uh Ardmore Tea Room in Nova Scotia explains how officers visited his restaurant last week after it had been reported that someone was dining indoors at the eatery breaking the COVID -19 rules. Which means so Karen drove by and went this motherfucker. Hang on. I can't believe it. I'm gonna think you're a man -eater.
Speaker: Yeah, go ahead. Yeah. Cormier told global news that the officer got out and was looking in the window and saw her looking and looking in the window. And I saw her looking at the mannequin. He explained he had confronted the officers who confirmed that the mannequin seated at the table had been mistaken for a human customer. Police spokesman confirmed that the officers had been called out to the restaurant after
Speaker: Reports of individuals, individuals, there's one goddamn mannequin. And they were told individuals were not following public health directives. He said officers attended and found there were no issues. Furthers my point on people need to mind their own goddamn business because you know the person that called that in drove by
Speaker: saw someone sitting without a mask or whatever and being indoors and was like, Oh, I'm calling the cops because they have nothing better to do with their boring ass life. Yeah. If I can't be in there, nobody can be in there. Exactly. Cause I'm special. I know I could be the owner of a restaurant and I'm just there doing regular maintenance, whatever, you know, just checking on the place and some ass clowns going to be like,
Speaker: Whoa, they're breaking the rules. Why am I not allowed to be there if they're there? What the fuck are you doing driving around or walking around if you're not even supposed to be out, dumbass? Speaking of lockdowns, I have a little quick story that I read and I saw a video about it. You might have seen the video. With this guy, he's locked down in, I think he's in London.
Speaker: But he sees across the street a good looking chick, you know, apartment buildings. And she's out on the roof of her building doing yoga or whatever. And he's like, wow, she's very pretty. So he actually takes a drone and attaches a note card to it, flies it over there. And the note says, you're very pretty. I would love to speak to you.
Speaker: So she takes the notecard, writes down her phone number, and he flies it back. And they actually started dating. And until lockdown broke, they had never actually physically met until actually lockdown actually broke. They went on dates, video chat dates where they would both sit on the roof with a dinner in front of them and the phone on the other side of the table. But they could see each other from across the street. That's cute as shit.
Speaker: I did see that that came out that came out like shortly after the the lockdown started. Mm hmm. Just within a few months in and like how how cool is that? And a lot of people were doing that. Yeah. Like with these dating sites, you know, whether it be I'm not so much tender, but like Bumble or whatever they would. Yeah. And then they would do virtual online dating, which I mean,
Speaker: essentially kind of where I'm at right now. Uh, that's how summer's way down in Charleston. Yeah. That's how we started. You know, we met on, on Tik TOK actually, she came into one of my lives one night and then we added each other on Snapchat and we became friends and started talking and, you know, everything we did up until
Speaker: at, you know, we, we got the meeting person was all online. Now we didn't, you know, did do like, like that, but I mean, you know, talking and getting to know each other. So yeah, we didn't like sending us a list of dick pics, you know, I don't send dick pics when they're asked for. So
Speaker: Like you don't want to see that Your camera doesn't zoom that much honey, let me tell you What you do is you grab the Barbie doll of your daughter and you have the Barbie doll in your dick so it looks giant
Speaker: I'm gonna grab my daughter's Barbie doll and be like, here, hold my dick, Barbie. Hold my dick, Barbie. It looks huge. Yeah, that's not weird. No, not at all. But it would make your cock look huge. Yeah, it would definitely make me end up on a list somewhere. She's like, why are you playing with a Barbie doll? Well, let me tell you a story there, officer.
Speaker: I have a little temper and I was trying to impress my girlfriend. And the cops like, you know what? I don't want to arrest you because that's just, that's just pathetic, but I have to do my job. You're sad. You are a sad fucker. Next thing you know there's protests, just small dicks matter.
Speaker: Hashtag MD or SDM. Signs, shirts, hats. A bunch of oversized guys walking around. You know they all have small dicks and they're just carrying signs. Small dicks matter. They got signs on their big jacked up throats. And we already know if you didn't have a sign line. We know.
Speaker: There's something we should put on our merch. I'm not going to be using my.
Speaker: Tony Stark dolls credit card for the gold diggers. Well, you go buy a brand new toy then really, you know, just go over by the
Speaker: buy dolls to make my petro look fake. Hashtag SDM. Yes. Oh, we're gonna start a trend. I'm doing it. Oh my God. We're gonna make merch that says SDM.
Speaker: All right. We don't need proof. Just buy the t -shirt. Picture didn't happen. Shut up. Just send us a picture of your truck. You get the shirt. Let us see what your truck looks like. You spent $100 ,000 on a truck? Yep.
Speaker: That guy gets a shirt. What kind of car do you drive? If you drive in Korea. 2021 Ford F 350. It's got a 12 inch lift and 54 inch tires.
Speaker: Yeah, you get a t -shirt, brother. Yeah. Dude calls in and is like, I want a t -shirt. Really? What do you drive? I drive a Prius. Fuck you. Fuck you. You don't need a shirt, you asshole. Fuck you, you asshole. How about we meet and I beat you up, you fucking nerd.
Speaker: Those things are so stupid, but they I'm tempted to buy one just because the gas mileage they get by fucking amazing gas The new ones are actually kind of cool -looking tail lights
Speaker: I love how we unintentionally lead into stories that I have pulled up. I have a penis story. I didn't Google it, so don't worry about that being on my search. Okay. So we got men with big noses have larger penises.
Speaker: Well, I have a giant Jew nose, and this is an actress. This was an actual scientific study. But didn't that come back to the, you know, if your hand is so big or whatever, your feet, you know? None of that applies. You know, they say big shoes. Yeah, I have a giant Jew nose. I have monstrous bear paws, and my feet are huge. So none of that is true.
Speaker: I've got three factors here that all say say this this study is a lie. Who did the study? Says uh it says well wait till you hear how they did the study. Oh that's what was gonna be my next question. Can you imagine being the person doing the studying? Let me measure her nose now. Let me measure her dick. Don't worry about it. You didn't have much say in the matter with this study.
Speaker: So researchers have revealed that men with larger conks, not cocks, conks, are up to 30 % bigger down below than those who have smaller noses. Experts have said that it could as a result of exposure to hormones in the womb, called androgens, with levels and pregnancies thought to impact the size of some body parts.
Speaker: 126 men from Japan were studied. We all know the story right there. Okay, that just says in Japan, they got nothing better to do. They've studied everything. They're like, what next? Let's check out. Yeah, 120 men from Japan were studied for the research and those with the nose length of
Speaker: 1 .7 inches had an average non erect penis of four inches while guys with more than two inches boasted an average penis size of 5 .3 now. Okay. So, so where do they measure the nose from? I think like the corner of the eye down or what? Because if you're saying two inches, that's like fucking Pinocchio.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't know. I don't know how they measure it. It doesn't really say it's, it's been previously suggested that big hands or feet corresponded with larger penises. And Dr. Hiroshi, I'm not even going to attempt that last name. Okay. Yeah, I'm going to, uh, jail.
Speaker: and now I'm done. Hiroshi, I got that part. Uh, said that the study reported in the basic and clinical andrology is the first to show a link between those and penis size. Now what they don't mention in this story, because I actually had a bigger story, the, the men that they, that they tested this theory on and they did this research on, uh, we're dead. What? They were cadaver bodies, uh, that were, you know, you, you,
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. So they were, they were, they were dead bodies and essentially lower the average penis size because from my understanding, the average penis size was like six inches, seven inches or something like that. That was my assumption. But now it's 5 .4. Wow. So I'm ahead of the curve. I'm still not.
Speaker: As my girlfriend says he's my boss is calling me I'm not gonna answer But once again that just that just says that in Japan these guy these scientists have nothing better to do and
Speaker: We're in the middle of a worldwide pandemic and they're researching. They're bored. Those, the penis side. Yeah, it's like, let's do some research on how to end the Coronavirus. No, I want to check out some digs. We should really measure some penises around here. We got any dead bodies? Stereotypically Asian men are said to have, you know. They're smaller anyways.
Speaker: Yeah, so in Japan, you're going to go off no size and base being in size. So what are you guys doing over there? I mean, China leads the world in like.
Speaker: technology and this and the other thing. Well, then you got the I lost my train of thought I forgot what I was gonna say. Well, speaking of dead bodies, you know, when you donate your body to science, you have no say in what your body is used.
Speaker: Don't touch me after I'm dead. Just put me in the ground. I don't know what your weird ass is doing to my body. No, but like the FBI will take dead bodies out to this farm and like, no, bum fuck nowhere. Yeah, the body farms. Yeah, the body farms that it's fucked up. Yeah, then we can see how long it takes for a body to bloat and explode. And, you know, it's helps with forensics. I get that. But you know what? I still want to be buried at sea.
Speaker: Yeah, they do that. They'll train the cadaver dogs. They'll stage fake crime scenes and all that stuff. I want to be shot in the face.
Speaker: I guess, I guess if you're going to do something with my body actors that do that, like stage a big crime scene, that would be bad. So it helps solve weird, nerdy doctor stretched by a little pecker out. Oh, look at it. I'm going to come back from the dead and pull an undertaker and sit up and be like motherfucker. Really? I said, don't touch that. That's not yours.
Speaker: of the
Speaker: or a lady with no size and this son of a bitch woke up from the day. Now, we have a zombie. Well, my wife and I are talking about the vaccine the other day. Speaking of zombies and you know, her one of her friends was like, I'm gonna go get the vaccine. And I'm like, I'm not. I refuse to do it. And she's like, why? I said, well, hey, it's not.
Speaker: It's not FDA approved. So somebody's got to be allowed to take care of the zombies when you guys all become zombies. Look, if we get zombies, man, I've been waiting for this day my whole life. Like I've been training since I was a, a wheel. I want zombies. They used to, they used to joke around out in Charleston. They're like,
Speaker: Everybody makes fun of the Darryl until they're zombies. Yeah. Everybody wants to be your friend. That's why we keep Blick around because he's our Darryl. Yeah. But speaking of, you know, we're talking about penises. Okay. Free condom to mark end of lockdown. Nice. Digital health clinic from Mars.
Speaker: I don't know if that's actual Mars. Our releasing June 21st condoms to mark the end of the coronavirus and the UK released to mark the day the UK is set to move out of the lockdown. Men's digital health clinic from Mars are giving away June 21st condoms to protect sexual health
Speaker: once limits on social contact are removed by the UK government. So basically they're like, look, we know you sons of bitches are horny as hell. And as soon as the restrictions come off, it's going to be, we know you're going to be fucking a complete fuck fest. Y 'all get your condoms for free at the company. They'd already do that though, at like the health clinic.
Speaker: like you just go in like I need some condoms. Yeah, like what is that? Planned Parenthood and stuff. Yeah, you can get free condoms and stuff like that. But the company says that they are urging men to wrap up, stay safe as they enjoy freedom again, following more than a year of COVID restrictions.
Speaker: from Mars. It is a company from Mars posted on Twitter as restrictions are set to be eased further from June 21st. It's crucial that we protect ourselves from this day forward and still think of safe sex to avoid sex, sexual transmitted infections. Yeah. You know, are they going to require you use a mask too?
Speaker: I don't know, man. They're going to have their restrictions, man. They're basically fucking Florida in the UK when June 21st comes around. It's all fair game, man. Amen to that. Get out there and get your, get your boogie on, man. Don't be scared. You know, during this whole pandemic thing, I haven't been scared once. It hasn't changed my life one bit. I ain't even gonna lie to you.
Speaker: A lot of people are open arms. You're taking our freedoms away from us. This is America. God damn it. And my freedom say, shut the fuck up and just stop being a dick. You sound stupid. Yeah. And you look even fucking dumber. The mask aren't hurting anybody. The mask aren't changing your life. You know, here in Ohio, um,
Speaker: I wear mine about the only place I wear mine is in the grocery store. Yeah, nobody and that's and that's just to give everybody else a little bit of peace of mind because I'm trying not to be an inconsiderate fucking prick. Yeah, I'm the same way. I'm asking my pocket. And when I get to where I'm going, I put it on right before walking doors.
Speaker: Yeah. Plus it's not even that big of a deal. It's still reason to start a fucking fight. The people that the anti maskers and the the pro maskers that their hands up in the air and make a big scene. All they're doing is they're just doing it for attention. They just want people. It's like definitely look at me. OK, well, we see you. You're in it. Yeah. Either side of the face. I was I woke up yesterday. I went to bed at a decent hour.
Speaker: and I woke up at 11 45 wide the fuck away. I fell asleep at like six 30 watching TV and I woke up at 11 40. Yeah, I got home. I was beat. No, no, it was close to it. It was like eight 30. It was eight 30 because it was right after my meeting and I got home and I was just so beat from beating because the sun is what gets you.
Speaker: You know, it's not, it's not that I'm doing heavy lifting or, you know, major exercise, but you go outside and stand in a hundred degree heat with, you know, you have to walk with a knife in front of you to cut the humidity. Uh, it's, you know, you get home and you're just beat to death. So I fell asleep at like maybe eight 39, something like that. And I'm 11 40 midnight, something like that. I woke up and I was wide the fuck awake.
Speaker: Dude, that's absolutely fucking worse. And my wife is laying there on my chest. She's got her head on my chest. So I grabbed the TV remote and I started watching. Smack her in the fucking head with it. No, I started watching Karen's on YouTube. And this lady was claiming that she had a medical note from her doctor saying she shouldn't wear a mask. And I was like, woman,
Speaker: And she was calling the cops because the store wouldn't let her go inside and the store was closing in six minutes. Well, I mean, in all honesty, if you have the quote unquote medical excuse, they're not supposed to bust your balls about it. Yeah. But at the end of the day, at the end of the day, they were getting ready to close in six minutes. They were getting ready to close in six minutes. At the end of the day, if you show up at six minutes before I close, I'm going to give you shit right then and there.
Speaker: Because I'm ready to go home. And there's no woman on this planet that can be in and out of the store in less than six minutes. Yeah. She's like, I just need two things. And the lady's like, I can get them for you. What do you want? And she's like, No, I want to come in. And she's like, Look, we're closing six minutes. If you put your mask on, you come in. I have a doctor's note saying I can't wear a mask. Yeah, like, give me a fucking break. Hmm.
Speaker: You know, you can grab a do rag and wrap it around your face and call it a day. Yeah, it's like I said, the pro maskers, anti maskers, when they're when they're making a big scene about it and they're causing issues, it's just a matter of everybody look at me. I haven't had my my feel of attention for the day. So everybody give me attention. It's like, yeah. So, you know, fucking. Yeah. I don't care if you wear one or you don't. I won't.
Speaker: You know, whatever it's, it's not going to hurt. I feel like it's not going to change my life if you have one or you have one on, but at the same time, if I'm going to the grocery store and the sign, I just don't want to deal with the Haskell somebody bitching at me because I'm not wearing a mask. So I put it on. Yeah. The sign says mask are required and fucking I throw my mask on, but.
Speaker: takes me two seconds. Yeah, you know, it doesn't suck. Yeah, I wear glasses. But at the same time, I put my mask on. And generally, it's not even covering my nose. It's just there to get peace of fucking mind. Yeah, you know, it's like, you know, my mask, I, I, I'm making a mask. I haven't finished it. I'm making the bane masks just so I can have fun with it. Mm hmm.
Speaker: I mean, if you're gonna do it, have fun with it. As I told you, my buddy Kevin ordered a unicorn mask. He said he was going. It was like one of the giant unicorn heads. It was like a plastic Halloween mask. I saw a dude, I saw a dude in a, you know your dinosaur thing you have? I saw a dude wearing one that was like an astronaut.
Speaker: And he was walking around in the store in it. Don't, don't even think it hasn't crossed my mind to wear that in the store. Oh, I wore my Deadpool mask the other day. I bought a Deadpool mask off a wish for like $2. Yeah. And it was definitely, it's not the greatest thing, but I found it laying in the kid's room the other day. So I threw it in the wash real quick.
Speaker: And I threw it on my head and my wife's like, what are you doing? I said, I'm going to the store to get cigarettes. She's like, you're wearing that. I'm like, it's a mask. It's like, whatever. She's like, as long as I'm not going, I don't care. But the funny thing is, right, right before I go into any store, I'm putting on my mask. I feel like I'm getting ready to rob the joint. Yeah.
Speaker: That is that just me or is that do you feel like you feel like you're in a movie getting ready to go in and rob the bank, you know, because I'm putting on a mask cover my. Yeah, it's it's it's funny because, you know, before had you walked into any some of these places, if you walk into any of these places with a mask on, it's automatically what the fuck is this jackass up to? Yeah. But I mean, it just goes back to like, you know, and I used to work at Orkin. Man, that that that Orkin uniform
Speaker: would get me into a lot of places that it probably shouldn't have because you walk, I could walk into a bank and now granted I had several banks that I took care of, but I would literally just walk into the door and say, Hey, I'm here to do your pest control. And they would just open the door. Let me ride into the back. Let me into the cashier area. Let me into the vault area. There's a, there's a guy on YouTube. He wanted to test the theory that a worker
Speaker: could get into anywhere with a small ladder and a yellow vest. And he said it showed video clips and stuff. But it was amazing how many places you could go with just like a three foot step ladder. Yeah.
Speaker: And, and a yellow vest. You know, I'm here to change some lights, blah, blah, blah. I, you know, when I'd go into these banks, you know, they were supposed to check my ID, check my working badge, uh, you know, have me sign in and this side, I would say 95 % of the time. They didn't do any of that. I literally just bought in and be like, Hey, I'm here to hear. Plus, you know, after the first couple of times, they all knew me, but, you know, but still I'm just saying like, it almost anywhere. And then you'd be like, Oh, okay.
Speaker: Oh, it's, it's, you know, that's, that's why I was, uh, I watched that video with my, my kid the other day and I was telling my wife about it and I said, you know what? Bank robbers are stupid because if you literally just kind of frequent the place in the yellow vest and change a couple of light bulbs every now and then, and then eventually people get to know you, you go and rob the place blind and nobody would know.
Speaker: It's like when I was at the, I'm at the majestic for work, quote unquote. And once they check me in, they literally go, what's your name? I go tell them my name. They write it down. They don't check my ID. They don't give me a badge or anything. They say, okay, go in. Well, I'm by myself for a good 300 yards going upstairs and whatnot. I said, I could literally change in the elevator.
Speaker: and Michael J. Fox in Secret of My Success style, and then just go to the pool. We were talking about that the other day. You're like, I wonder if I can just change the street clothes and get them. Oh, my God. I didn't try it. But I thought about it. Because the other every other hotel,
Speaker: With the exception of that hotel, every hotel, you have to leave your ID there. They give you a badge, they check in, they make sure your ID matches and the name that you put down and what company you work for. This other company, the majestic, they're like, okay, what company are you with? I'm with this company. Okay. They take your word for it. I'm like, I'm just wearing a white polo shirt and slacks. It's not like I'm wearing a big logo on my back or something.
Speaker: I'm like, really, really? It's an all inclusive resort. I'm going to breakfast. I mean, yeah, I would. I mean, I don't want to see I just take it back back in with me change industry clothes, go over and be like, Well, I have to take a backpack in because I have all my my materials, like, you know, propaganda, so to speak for the tours, what pamphlets and propaganda.
Speaker: But I I fought with a lady the other day she wanted to go ziplining and Her mother's like I don't want to go ziplining. She's like, oh no mom You'll love it and I said, well this zipline goes and it ends in the water. She's like I can't get in the water. I'm like, okay and She's like it's I have a colostomy bag so I can't get in the water. I'm like, oh right and you're gonna do ziplines and
Speaker: You know, there's other things you can do. And the daughter was just adamant, we have to do zip lines. I'm like, she's got a colostomy bag woman. I think I think she's 75. Maybe she's trying to get her life. That's why I said I don't know. Yeah, no, it's a weird concept, the whole what people want what they think they can get. Ouch.
Speaker: I like selling tours. It's just, like I said, the company I work for, you can't, I don't have enough clients. So it's upsetting. My boss has sent me like 15 messages saying, hey, are you coming to the meeting? No. There we go. They said they're waiting for me at the meeting. You guys have been waiting a long time because I'm not going. Sorry. Even if I wanted to go.
Speaker: Yeah, even if I wanted to go I know go it's no problem. I know yeah My batter was my laptop was done. Ah And usually my cords like right at my feet, but it was all tangled up under my cabinet. Oh, okay. Yeah Well, even if I wanted to go to that meeting, I don't have enough cash to get a cab or a bus over there. So Fuckers ain't paying me nothing
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. Well, that's my biggest problem. They make you go and sit for two and a half hours. And telling you about a tour that I'm sorry, there's not a tour in town with the exception of maybe two that I haven't done. I've been doing this for 20 years. I pretty much know every tour. So, you know, yeah, go ahead. Oh, yeah. Do you guys have to do like
Speaker: Like, uh, well, you're just selling the tours, nevermind. That was a dumb question. Cause when I was down at Charleston, I was going to, I was going to go into the tour work, but I was going to be a tour. I was going to be a tour guide and, uh, they like handed me this book that was like 10 inches thick. And they're like, you got to read this and blah, blah, blah. I'm like, no, I don't.
Speaker: I was like, I've been on your tours and I've actually taken, or I've actually taken over tours because your tour guides are fucking idiots. So yeah, the, the one place, my favorite place to go is Chichen Itza. It's the, the big pyramid during the equinox and all this crazy stuff happens. And I've been on that tour in 20 years, I've gone maybe 30 times and
Speaker: Every time I go, you know, they say to, to become a tour guide at Chitzanitza, you have to pass a test and do all this stuff. And I'm like, you know what? The tour guide you guys have suck. Because I've had people, I've had clients come back and go, you told me more about the tour than the tour guide. I said, well, and these guys do it every day. And I'm like, you know, I get, you get bored with your job, but Chitzanitza is an amazing place. But we do, we do what's called fam trips.
Speaker: Well, we'll get what they'll, they'll send like five or six of us from the same company to go to the tour. So basically you and your work buddies go to the tour for the day. And after 20 years of doing selling toward, well, call it 15, 15 years of selling tours, there hasn't been there. I've gone deep sea fishing. That's like $300 for free. I've done every club there can be.
Speaker: jet skis, you know, ziplining, there's like 15 places zipline, I've done them all. There, you know, there's nothing nobody can teach me about these tours, because if it was a new tour, okay. But once again, just send me there. I can pitch it. Yeah, I'm a little bit of a history buff. I'm kind of a nerd,
Speaker: and the
Speaker: That's wrong. Where did you get that? Where did you pull that shit from? Did you read off on some Wikipedia page? No, that's not hard. I like made this one chick feel so bad once I went on the plantations. I felt bad. But at the same time, I'm like, you're going to give a tour, at least be accurate. And I basically took over the tour and was telling the story. And I did that on a ghost tour one time. And I caught myself and I'm like,
Speaker: I'm going to do my bad because people were talking to me during the tour and they're like, so, you know, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, yeah, so this is the story and this is the history of the tour. I was like, um, if we could not talk during the tour, that would be great. And I'm like, if we could be accurate, that'd be fantastic. Exactly. Well, what's cool about Chitsanitza is, is the world's first observatory is in Chitsanitza.
Speaker: and you know the pyramid is During the equinox the pyramid is is it's not it's not triangular it's triangular, but it's not triangular like in in Egypt it's like almost like stair -step triangle Right well during the equinox a shadow
Speaker: comes down the set of the stairs on the side of the stairs, and it literally looks like a snake climbing down the stairs. And it's wicked awesome. The problem is going during the Equinox. Normally, when you go, there's maybe 500 people there. Not during pandemic, but during the Equinox, there's like 6 ,000 people there. And so I don't go during the Equinox. I've gone once, and I'm like, yeah, never again.
Speaker: but they do a they do a night show because it is a 14 hour day if you do the night tour and the night tour you sit around with headphones on and they tell you a story about the different things and they have lights on the pyramid replicating what happens during the equinox so you can actually see it without being there during equinox but it's ridiculous but I recently just did my final tour where I literally can say I've done them all is swimming with whale sharks
Speaker: I did it right before the lockdowns like three months before lockdowns. This could probably be a better story if you said the well shark bit off one of your limbs. Well, well sharks, well sharks. The thing is they're the size of a fucking city bus. They're massive and they're, you know, they're, they eat plankton and stuff. So they don't have teeth, but you're not swimming with one. There's like 15 or 20.
Speaker: So it's like walking down main street surrounded by buses, but you're in the water. And, you know, the only thing I don't like about it is it's not just your boat. There's like 15, 20 boats there at a time. So there, you know, it's, it's a bit ridiculous, but it's, it's really cool. So it was, while we're talking about, while we're talking about Mexico, um,
Speaker: And again, uh, is, uh, so with Cinco de Mayo was yesterday. Is that because everybody's on, on Twitter, you know, everybody wants to be a fucking social warrior.
Speaker: Right. And screaming at Americans because we cultural appropriation and we stole an American. I don't celebrate. Yeah. You know, but is that an actual that's an actual thing? Yeah, it's an actual thing. It's it's just another reason for people to drink. Well, that's all it is up here, much like the same thing as Fourth of July. It's just a reason to drink. And, you know, it's the day that St. Patrick drove all the potatoes out of Ireland.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. But it's it. My wife would be able to explain, be able to explain Cinco de Mayo better. But I believe it's an Independence Day thing. It's it's not really an Independence Day. I think it was a battle that they won over over the French.
Speaker: I'm not going to be, I'm not going to quote it and say that I'm a hundred percent. Right. But I think that's basically what it is, is like a major battle that they won over, over France. I don't think it's so much of a independence day. Like we think it is here. Well, you know, you know how, you know how, uh, Mexicans call people gringo. Okay. Do you know what, do you know what gringo actually means? That's like white guy or white person or something. No, wrong, wrong. Back in the day, during the
Speaker: No, but during the whole, the beginning of Cinco de Mayo and stuff, they would, the opposing army would be wearing green. So they would say, they would scream out, green go home. Green go home. And it just became gringo.
Speaker: Oh, I'm gonna have to Google that. I'm gonna have to find out if that's accurate. I've been called a green door. I've been told that I've been told that by about nine different people down here. Every every time it comes up. I'm like, I hate it. It sounds derogatory to me.
Speaker: well i mean because that's how it's said yeah exactly now if that's accurate i want to scream at somebody be like i'm not even fucking wearing green you piece of shit exactly the problem is the problem is the person that's calling you gringo probably doesn't know what the hell you're talking about they're like what what but that's that's the way it was told to me that's the way they told that it was told to me they're like oh no gringo is they would say gringo home and i'm like wait really that's kind of
Speaker: lame ass way to put it, but okay. I don't want to type in the origin of gringo right now. I'm going to wait. I'm going to wait and do it like two days from now and be like, ah, motherfucker. On Wednesday, you'll be like, ah, Saturday, you'll be like, ah, motherfucker, you're wrong. I'm like, what are you talking about?
Speaker: like you did with the whole role models thing. And I was like, hey, I don't I don't care. What is he talking about? And he kicked in here. Do you guys have Domino's down there? Yes. So, you know, a little nostalgia thing. Did you see what Domino or who Domino Domino's has brought back, huh? They brought back the noid. Oh, no shit. Yeah, man. Well, they've got this new like
Speaker: robot car that delivers your pizza to you and stuff. Yeah. And the, and the commercials they, they brought back avoid the noise man. And the little burglar is in there. He's like trying to.
Speaker: uh, stop the robot car from, from delivering the pizza to steal your pizza. And I was like, Oh my God. And your kids are like, what are you so excited? Because he was cool as hell back in the day. Like McDonald's used to have the, uh, moon guy of its kids don't know anything about today. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, man. It's like, I, I seen that the other day out of commercial and I was like, the noise.
Speaker: You sneaky little bastard well speaking of old things Well nostalgia anyways We are old things yes, yes, but have you heard about this mandala effect? No Well mandala effect is is basically that we it's it's a theory But it's basically that we've slipped into an altered dimension for instance Ed McMahon
Speaker: You could win from, he would bring a check to you from what company? Publisher clearing house. Apparently you're wrong.
Speaker: I saw a commercial day where it was somebody was talking about this mandala effect. And it's not how it was just clearing house. It was something else. I remember it was like American founder's fund or some shit like that. And I was like, Oh, yeah. I mean, well, that's like, it's the publisher's clearing house, but it's, it's owned by that company. Right. Exactly. But you know, they're also saying, you know, the, the monopoly guy used to have a monocle.
Speaker: He doesn't anymore you can't find a box about it Are you sure? That's what that's what they're saying on this on on this if you put him in dollar effect the other one is You know sin bad the comedian He did a movie and I'm sure you saw the movie because I know I did he did the Shazam movie Yeah, he could not find a copy
Speaker: He personally, uh, did everything he could to erase that movie. Yeah. And, and, uh, some guys offering like 10 grand of anybody can show, show him as a VHS of this. Cause he's like, it doesn't exist. I'll give him a 10 grand if they can give me a D V VHS. And I was like, motherfucker, I'm gonna find me one. I could use 10 grand. Cause I know I've seen that movie.
Speaker: But Sinbad actually admitted he was doing like a radio show and he's like, yes, I actually did that movie. And I spent all the he said the only reason I did that movie is because I was on crack. I was using it for crack money. Yeah, they were. I heard that. I don't know. It's been a couple of weeks ago that I that I heard that this and I'm like, I remember that movie. I've seen that movie terribly explains most of Sinbad's career is the fact that he was yeah, because
Speaker: funny comedian Terrible actor or actor and even worse movies although he did that one with Phil Hartman Was it was like the Long -lost friend shows up on nowhere, but it's actually not his friend. It's it's sin bad hiding from guys that he owes money to I'd have to look it up
Speaker: Yep, that's the one hilarious love that movie because he he you know sin bad
Speaker: You see him in the beginning of the movie, he's going to McDonald's and stuff. Well, he gets to Phil Hartman's house. He's pretending to be somebody else. And they're like, oh yeah, that's right. You're a vegetarian. And Sid Beds like, huh? Oh shit. And at one point he, he runs off and runs to McDonald's. But yeah, it's, it's, uh, the, the mandala effect. There's a lot of things that that supposedly, uh, uh,
Speaker: So you're saying we live in a multiverse, like the MCU? Yeah, exactly. That's what they're saying, this mandala effect is that we've slipped into an alternate universe. Well, if we're in a multiverse, any Glicks that are out there listening? Subscribe. Subscribe. If you're my alternate universe or multiverse version of me, let it be known here and now that I challenge you to a fight, much like that would be one.
Speaker: Yes. I will be the only one. I am the only one. I am you long. I'm nobody bitch. Yes. I'm putting that challenge out there right now. Hell yeah. You sons of bitches. But yeah, it's a weird
Speaker: Concept to think about when I was like, yeah, I don't believe that because I do remember the monocle on the Melbourne Monopoly guy Yeah, and I guarantee you at my parents house. There's a monopoly box with the monocle Yeah, well now I'm gonna have to look at that because it's just something that I thought was always there Yeah, well, you know, you really fall into you you really need to step away from your little conspiracy videos and I love them now I can I can work on JFK's
Speaker: I can watch stuff on JFK for days. You can't tell me one person did that. You just can't. One person did that. It's not true. There's no way Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I just told you. You can't convince me that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. There's no way in fucking hell. Now, oddly enough, there's people that, you know, the dumbest people on the planet,
Speaker: are the flat earth people. Those people are fucking dumb. I can't watch those videos. But the other dumb people was that we didn't go to the moon. You know, somebody said that to Neil Armstrong. Neil Armstrong punched him in the nose. Yeah, he did. You know, I it's
Speaker: I don't know. I'm trying to think of how to word that exactly, but, uh, they claim, they claim that some of the photos and stuff are, can't be real and stuff like that. But you got to remember back then they were training and photos were taken and the flax, the, the, the people that were putting out the news would grab any photo. They could doctored a little bit. So you got doctored photos. Yes. But you also have the real photos. You know what I mean?
Speaker: Mark in the chat says, you recognize something as something, it's not you. It's not you see it as something else. I swear it melts your brain. But with that whole moon landing thing, obviously, I think they landed on the moon. I think that there was the race between the Russians in America and whatnot to see the moon first, this, that and the other thing.
Speaker: Some of these conspiracy theorists, when you listen and look at what they're saying, it's like, hmm, I definitely see your point. But at the same time, it's like, but I mean, I don't know, I wasn't alive back then. So, you know, but conspiracy theorists are weird to me. It's like, y 'all gotta find something better to do with your fucking time.
Speaker: Well, it's it all comes down to, you know, it's like you watch sports. For me, I'm like, Chris, you got to find something better to do with your fucking time. Hey, Jeff, you see my. No, but you see my point. You understand my point. I mean, it's it's all about what you're into. It's like you saying to me, why do you fucking look at videos of people building cars for days on end? Find something better to do with your time. And I'm like, fuck you. I like it.
Speaker: And that's the whole thing with the conspiracy things. People are like, you saw that Indiana Jones crystal squall? Yeah, you were talking about that a couple weeks ago. At the end of that movie, that Russian chick, she's like, I want to know everything. That's what people want. They want to know. And unfortunately, they will never know. And if they found out the truth, they probably wouldn't accept it. I'm good with not knowing.
Speaker: Don't don't don't fuck up my happy little life anymore. I want you to go. I watch the conspiracy stuff and go really, really. All right. I'm going to send you some YouTube videos that you can watch and I'll freak out. I'm sure not conspiracy. It's just like like
Speaker: The worst warm layers too. There's two YouTube wormholes that I'll fall into that are the absolute fucking worst, but they are so cool. And it's, uh, nature, like devastating nature and, and, and, and lost like, like lost places.
Speaker: or undiscovered places. Oh, like that island off the coast of Malaysia or some shit that nobody can get onto. Yeah, that place sounds fucked up. I totally want to go there. Yeah. So I mean, I would totally get on a boat like fuck you. I'm going. Yeah, it's probably. But it's so cool. You know, you watch these like these tsunamis or these these giant waves. It's just like, oh,
Speaker: What the fuck, you know? Mother Nature. Yeah, like that movie Impossible. That movie Impossible with Owen Wilson? No, it was Ewan McGregor. And I can't remember the launch date. Where they were separated during a tsunami. Yeah, it was Obi -Wan Kenobi. They were separated during a tsunami. I know, we made it two hours.
Speaker: We made it two hours and we haven't glitched out. I was excited about my correct Star Wars reference. Oh, yes. I did make a correct Star Wars reference. After nine episodes, Chris finally got a Star Wars reference correct. He didn't call it Star Trek. My Star Wars Jar Jar Binks. I literally, you were telling that story about, oh, I don't know Jar Jar is pretty cool. And I was like, this man's a fucking idiot.
Speaker: I partnered with a fucking moron. I literally took you serious for all of like the first minute and a half. I'm like, there's no way he can be serious. I triggered all the nerds with that one. Oh my God.
Speaker: I was listening. I was listening. I was listening to that the other day or and I lost my shit. I was laughing so hard. I was like, God, I'm so fucking stupid, but I know somebody's going to hear this at some point in time. And my son was like, he's not serious, is he? I was doing dishes and I had it on on the YouTube on the TV and my son was like, he's not serious, is he? I'm like, no, he's kidding. He's like, are you sure? He sounds pretty convincing.
Speaker: He's just being an asshole. He knows it would bother me and every other nerd on the planet. So he's doing it just to piss people off. That is the greatness of Glick and all of his glory. He is a mastermind asshole. You know how to piss off, you know how to piss off basketball fans, right? Yeah. Michael Jordan sucks. I agree with that 100%. Really? Yeah. I don't like Michael Jordan.
Speaker: I don't like the fact that he was kind of a douche. I don't like him. I think everybody gives him way more credit than he deserves because if you look back at that Chicago Bulls team, the guys who deserve the credit that don't get the credit are everybody else too.
Speaker: The guys that made Michael Jordan who he was I mean Mm -hmm. It's the same thing with LeBron James. I mean LeBron James is an amazing athlete. He's a Jackass on Twitter, but he's an amazing athlete. But if you look back at his career When he was in Cleveland and he didn't have the surrounding co -stars Cleveland was good and he was great and
Speaker: I'm not going to take that away from him. I honestly think he was better than Michael Jordan because of what he had in Cleveland initially. And then he went to Miami and they'd put a super team around him. They won a couple, I think they won one or two ranks or some shit like that. And then he came back to Cleveland and they, they put good guys around him. And now he's in LA and, and they, and they've got a team around him in LA. The only problem is in the NBA is all the other teams that want to compete and want to win championships.
Speaker: they're building super teams. And, you know, well, they're getting all these guys. And so, yeah, I mean, Michael Jordan was great for his time, but there was guys in that era like. Well, fuck, Larry Bird was good, too. Yeah. Larry Bird, John Stockton, Karl Malone, Charles. What's his name? The crazy guy that David Madonna, what's his name? Dennis Rodman. He was a badass. But Rodman knew his job. There was a set that I've seen the other day that there was like
Speaker: six or seven games where Rodman didn't score a single point, but he had like, he had like 20, 30 rebounds. He had a bunch of assists. And I was like, that was his role. So that's the same as Jordan. Yeah. You know, was Michael Jordan great? Yeah. Michael Jordan was great. Is he the greatest of all time? Let's look at the team. And then when he went to Washington and he went to the Wizards, he was a
Speaker: complete disaster because he didn't have superstars around him to, to boost that. Well, it's a, it's like Gretzky. Gretzky knew his job. He literally, um, you know, no, but Gretzky knew his job. A lot of people be like, yes, Gretzky lead, lead the league in scoring, but he also led the league in assists and everything else. You know, the man knew his job.
Speaker: And Gretzky was a badass. There's a DVD set I want to buy. It's like the life and times of Gretzky. And it's supposed to be fucking just amazing. I'm sure it is. I don't have the patience to watch that much sports. I can't even watch NASCAR.
Speaker: I like NASCAR, but I can't watch it either. I mean, I'll watch sports. If I'm in a bar and it's on the TV, yeah, I'll watch. But if I'm sitting at home, there are no sports on my TV. It's not going to happen. Watching football in a bar. They scored a home run. Exactly. What did he just say? Sorry.
Speaker: How many points is that? No, I've never, I've, you know, uh, my, you know, it comes from my influence. My dad was huge into cars and my grandfather and all them, they were into cars and my dad's sport was fishing and, and bowling. I can bowl like a motherfucker. Yeah.
Speaker: I'm a hell of a bowler. My dad was a hell of a bowler. My mom was a hell of a bowler, but I guarantee you I wouldn't hold it against him, but I probably, my dad probably couldn't hit a home run to save his life. You know, you know, it, you know, he probably wouldn't know what a safety is in football. I don't even know what a fucking safety is in football.
Speaker: I couldn't I couldn't even begin it. Yeah, I was gonna say one of these days you'll have to explain it to me but but I don't I don't the thing is though you could say or explain it to me for three hours or like at the end of the day I'm so like yeah, I don't care. It's like me trying to explain to you that that the new generation NASCAR they're using a transactional transactional transaxle words are hard instead of a normal transmission.
Speaker: I'm like, yeah, do the cars go vroom, vroom, fast, fast? Well, it's supposed to be, well, there, there, it's a better shifting ratio, better weight balance and, and all this other stuff. I watched a video on it yesterday. It was, to me, it was like, wow, that's fucking amazing. Where you'd be watching it going, why are we watching this? I don't care. I just want to know if the car's going to go fast and if they're going to wreck and yeah, that's what I want to watch. That's like, I watch drag racing.
Speaker: but I couldn't I couldn't tell you who's in the **** car. I just want to watch the car do a wheelie. It's Tony Stewart going to jump out of his car and punch Jeff Gordon in the face at the end of the race. That's what I want to know. I'd like to see. I'd like to see that but well, man. Yeah, it looks like we've hit the we finally made it through one without a glitch. I'm impressed with us. We had a couple hiccups in the early beginning but I think that was on my end and then I fixed it and I don't think it'll it'll uh
Speaker: It'll fuck up this process much, but we'll go ahead and call this a show, man, I think. Amen to that. We covered every subject under the sun. We talked about penises. We talked about penises. We talked about cars. We talked about some sports that I still don't understand. And we talked about blacktop mojo.
Speaker: Blacktop mojo guys go check out blacktop mojo if you haven't already those guys are a fucking killer rock band and I'll be a fucking their version their version of Phil Collins in the air tonight fucking amazing. Yeah, I do I'll be a fangirl for a minute
Speaker: They're they're one of my favorite bands and uh, I don't know several months back. I I made a couple tick tock videos. Um, I had to do two parts because I had to I had to make the sound and at that time he you know and uh They they when they liked my video on about shit my pants and then I yeah and then they liked it on on twitter on instagram and stuff too and i'm like hell yeah and
Speaker: I didn't know how to word or how to write the message out to Matt, the lead singer, but I wanted to get their permission to use their music on our podcast. And I honestly did not think that I was gonna hear back from him, but Matt messaged me back and I was like, holy shit, dude, I was so fucking excited. They're absolutely one of my favorite bands. I listen to them all the time.
Speaker: Oddly enough, you messaged me the other day and said, hey, I'm talking to a band. I'm going to talk to a band about opening and closing music. And I was like, oh, fuck. It's going to be some weird fucked up, weird band. And then when you told me a couple of days later, Blacktop Mojo hit me up and I was like, I fucking know that name. I follow these guys on YouTube. They're awesome. I'm in.
Speaker: So yeah, I mean, so I had to contain my excitement. It was pretty awesome that Matt reached out to me and answered me back. So we're going to continue to put their music at the beginning and end of the podcast. Hopefully you guys enjoy it. Hopefully one day they'll get close enough to Ohio because they're a Texas based band. Right. I'll get to go see them in concert.
Speaker: Uh, or we can get them, we can get them to download the HAPS app and we can go live with them. Yeah, maybe. We'll see how that works out. I don't want to be, I don't want to come across like a weird stalker. Matt, will you come on to our podcast? And mention us on your YouTube channel.
Speaker: No, but I mean, it's a it would be a win -win for us because we'd be able to actually do an interview. We've been talking about doing interviews with with local bands and stuff. If we're gonna do an interview with a band, Blacktop Nojo would be the one to do it. Because they actually look like we do. Oh, yeah. Bearded goofy looking guys. And the difference is their professionals compared to us
Speaker: We're just faking it. Yeah, we're faking it until we make it. But like I said, that Matt dude can sing like you read about. The man is ridiculous. I actually have on my work phone, the part of Phil Collins in the air tonight that Blacktop Mojo did, the part with the drum. That's actually a ringtone for him when a message comes in.
Speaker: nice yeah because i can set up custom messages and stuff so that's actually my ringtone anybody that listens to this or hears this definitely check out blacktop mojo there they're on all social media across the board you know instagram facebook twitter youtube check out their youtube most importantly so you can
Speaker: Go to Spotify, go help them out on Spotify and tell them nonsensical nonsense sent you. They'll be like, oh, oh, that shitty podcast. Oh, that shitty podcast. Those guys wanted to use our songs. Losers. We're rock stars. Let's go and wrap this up. Yeah.
Speaker: Guys, thanks for listening. Uh, those that were chatting with us, we appreciate your chat as always. And, uh, I guess I'll see you what Saturday, man. I know hopefully. Yeah. So I'm not looking at a black screen, but yeah, like I said, my phone will not charge while sitting in the stand. I need to get a new cable, get a new cable, get it, get it charged before we, before we record.
Speaker: But I had plenty of, I had plenty of battery when we tried to get initially started. We kept glitching out in that start and my, I had my screen too bright and it just, by the time we did go live, I went from 50 to 30%. So it happens. Yeah. What are you going to do?
Speaker: But thanks for listening, guys. We appreciate you. Again, this is nonsensical nonsense. And you can find us across the board on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, TikTok and Blacktop Mojo's on TikTok as well. And if you guys follow us on Facebook, you can join us in on these lives and chitchat with us a little bit back and forth. But we're on like five different pages on Facebook.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't know. We're everywhere. Well, we're on the KTM Productions page, the YouTube supporters page, nonsensical nonsense page. And are we on your homepage? I think we might be on my homepage. We're on the Glick Show page. And I shared it on the Kevin Hawley Show. And with the exception of this one, if you want to rewatch the video, it's on the KTM Productions YouTube channel. With the exception of this one.
Speaker: We are everywhere. We're trying to get out there. But yeah. So anyways, thanks guys. We'll see you all Saturday. Saturday. We'll be live and rocking and rolling Saturday. Jeff, thanks for hanging out with me for a few hours tonight and later, y 'all.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Electric eyes Yeah, they pulled me away She said I got you There's no tires So come with me Anywhere you wanna go Anywhere the wind blows
Speaker: Always how you never know In the middle of the sunshine Whilst in the starlight Any place or anytime I'm going left
Speaker: Narcotic chaos Oh, I finally see The hateful path Enlightenment Stay away your dreams Anywhere you wanna go Anywhere the wind blows
Speaker: Always high and ever low In the middle of the sunshine I steal the starlight Anyplace or anytime
Speaker: Anywhere you wanna go Anywhere the wind blows Always how you never know In the middle of the sunshine Lost in the starlight Anyplace or anytime
