Transcript
Speaker: In a world where consensus is as elusive as a unicorn, polar opposites like Donald Trump and Joe Biden find common ground. The Meeting Point? The Nonsenseical Nonsense Podcast. Yes, you heard it right, folks. This podcast, a beacon of hilarity and wit, is an oasis of agreement in the desert of political discord.
Speaker: Even Hollywood heavyweights like Brad Pitt and Keanu Reeves, alongside podcasting titans Joe Rogan and Joey Diaz, are united in their laughter, declaring it the funniest podcast you've never heard of. At the heart of this podcast are three jesters, Glick, Jeff, and the newest addition, Connor. They're the modern -day musketeers of the podcast world, armed not with swords, but with words. They wield their wit and humor like weapons, verbally vanquishing their podcast competition.
Speaker: Their verbal jousting and jesting are a symphony of hilarity that resonates with listeners worldwide, making them return for more, episode after episode. The Nonsenseical Nonsense podcast is a unique blend of banter and brilliance. It's like a variety show for your ears, where the unexpected is the norm. Every episode is a surprise, a journey into the minds of Glick, Jeff, and Connor. It's like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're going to get,
Speaker: But you know it's going to be deliciously entertaining. But the magic of nonsensical nonsense doesn't end there.
Speaker: The podcast is as accessible as it is entertaining. Live episodes filled with laughter and learning air every Wednesday and Saturday at 7 Eastern. And for those who miss the live shows, worry not for the echoes of their humor resound and replays available wherever you find your favorite podcasts, be it Spotify or Zencaster. The nonsensical nonsense podcast also lays down the gauntlet with the open door challenge every Saturday.
Speaker: It's not for the faint -hearted, but for the brave souls who dare to be part of the show, to add their voices to the chorus of hilarity. In a nutshell, the Nonsensical Nonsense podcast is more than just a podcast. It's a phenomenon, a celebration of the absurd and the amusing. It's where words may be hard, but laughter is easy. So tune in, and prepare to be entertained by the masters of Mirth, Glick, Jeff, and Connor. Welcome to the world of nonsensical nonsense.
Speaker: Hey, y 'all look the fuck out today. My crayons are short. The box is full. My bottle of glue is topped off. My helmet's on tight, baby. We bought the rhythm with the tism. Let's get with it. Suck my dick and eat my ass. Oh, you sons of bitches. That's how we start to show. Why? Because at the end of the day, we're
Speaker: grown -ass men with the maturity level of a 12 -year -old boy. Facts. Is that weird? We'll get longer and longer. Eventually, I'll just make like one long -ass fucking clip. It's just three hours. We just sit here in the background going, yeah, facts. Yeah, facts. That's not true.
Speaker: It's a good thing this isn't talking shit cuz Brian would probably fucking jump out a window but as long as an intro that was That's why he that's why he is that's really seeking Susan What's going on everybody happy Wednesday welcome to the show If you don't know that by now well
Speaker: After that three -hour intro, you should know by now. You should know the name of the show. Jeremy, she's in the building, hanging out down there. Connor's about one no -call, no show away from being fired. Damn, I thought I was going to get fired. Like our old guest? No, we're saving that new live. Actually, I have no idea where Connor is.
Speaker: Um, Jeff's in the building. He's a wolf in sheep's clothing. I don't know. Apparently he's been watching the wolf of wall street on replay lately. I don't know what the hell's going on. I am. I am the epitome of wolf in sheep's clothing. I'm, I'm unassuming, but I'm a fucking powerhouse dude. You're like a fucking chihuahua in a Gucci sweater. Shut up. Feel pretty fucking cool when you think about it. It's like a knockoff Gucci that fell off a trailer.
Speaker: It's actually spelled Geechee. It says Geechee. Geechee. It's Geechee. It's pronounced Geechee. You're like a cross -eyed Chihuahua. I'm not assuming is the point. With an underbite and three legs.
Speaker: Yeah. Trust me. And you and you wish you were me. I get it. It's OK. Still hasn't learned to adapt without the third with only three legs. The bar, the bar is still very low for you. So the fact that you get out of bed and dress yourself in the morning, everybody's like, hey, that's the fucking accomplishment. Hey, I can tie my own fucking shoes now. So, fuck you. One's a Chihuahua. The other one's a Sasquatch. I got a story about that here in a little bit, too.
Speaker: No, Jesus. But if you guys know me by now, I'm Glick. I'm their champ. I'm the people's champ. I'm the greatest champion of all time. Wait, what people? You know, the people.
Speaker: They. Is it them? They say? Yeah. OK. Yeah. They call me the champ. I see. They call me their champ. Your imaginary friends. Fucking Sasquatch community. Get it right, Jeff. Come on now. Han Solo over here. What's going on in the chatters box? How you guys doing? See? Bring his bitch ass in here and stick up for him damn self. Yeah.
Speaker: Painter in the building. Painter, everyone. I don't know why. Peter's a wise man. Painter? That was a fail.
Speaker: Yeah, you know every time I hear the name Peter I think of the that that movie that I know you don't like is Office space where he's like, hey Peter man, check out channel nine Because you've never worked in an office if you've ever worked in an office everybody in that movie is representative
Speaker: Have you ever talked to me? Could you imagine me working in an office? You are the guy that's going, Hey, Peter, man, check out channel nine. It's the press exam again. You're that you're Dietrich Bader. There's, there's no filter between. Yeah. I'm doing the drywall down there at the McDonald's. My brain in my mouth. So if somebody, he literally says,
Speaker: In the movie he says he says he asked him the main character asked the jerk mater He says what would you say if everybody ever said you have a case you two Mondays? He goes, I don't know I believe you get your ass kicked for saying something like that. That's you See you're represented in that movie do you just don't see it? Far into the building it's like
Speaker: You know, it's like going into the haunted forest or whatever. Nobody really goes back there because it's behind the copy room. I'll be right back. I'm being paged. Glick's normal self is the guy with the stapler. I just, no, I just, I have no filter. Like I'm not, I'm not built for an office. Oh, trust me. I know you have no filter. I've played cod. Yeah. And I'm just not built for that kind of environment. I wouldn't,
Speaker: I couldn't even spend an hour in there. Yeah. I would just be fired relatively quick because I would call people out on their bullshit and hurt feelings and probably throw a copy machine across the room to prove my fault. I'm going to need you to come in on a Saturday. Yeah. Well, fuck your Saturday. Yeah. Well, you know, I'm going to need you to go fuck yourself. How's that sound? I wish you could take a long walk off a short clip. How's that sound, buddy? Oh, you're the boss. I'm the champ. I'll rank you.
Speaker: I can just see him standing up to the boss. Just the boss is like, hey, I'm your boss. Yo, I'm the champ, so fucking eat my asshole. Steven, you've seen Office Space. Yeah, of course I have. My god, yeah. He's a mix between Milton.
Speaker: And, and, and Dietrich Bader's character. Like you steal his stapler. He's going to burn down your office. I don't know. He could, he could be Peter. He could just be the one that's like, Hey, I'm going to need you to come in on Saturday. It's not going to happen. Yeah. I mean, like I said, he's represented it all over that fucking movie. He's also a little bit of Michael Bolton. Well, no, you know who he is.
Speaker: He's one of the bobs. His name is Michael Bolton. They're like, just like the singer. And he's like, actually, I go by Mike and they're like.
Speaker: Yeah, so he can go because he doesn't like Michael Bolton. The guys evaluating his job are like, fuck this guy. He doesn't like Michael Bolton, even though he's never. What's your favorite song? All of John C. McKinley is genius. And John C. McKinley. Thank you. I was about to just ask who that was. My favorite song. You know, no, you know who he is. He's the guy that gets hit by the truck.
Speaker: Or he's the guy that's that's at the party and he's like if all things go well, I'm sure my old face Oh Oh
Speaker: It's it's a combination of all of those that's click you are that movie you just haven't seen the fucking movie all the way I have to get that movie now. Thank you Jeff My wife's getting the residual fucking replay value of it all so then she's getting all the jokes after they've been recycled In the background, you know, I
Speaker: He's a trihard. He's the greatest player. Oh, you know what? Both of you, Glick. No. It was fucking Brian's fault. If we're not calling out, if we're not helping, then he's yelling and screaming at us. When we do call out, because you can't, because he buckles under pressure, and he can't clutch up, he gets mad. He's like, fuck you guys. I quit. And he left. Oh, no. You fucking rage quit, you bussing. Shut up, Jeff. I'd like to see you playing. Call me if you want to. You're one of the best rage quit. Got off my heart.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: I don't play video games because I'm 40 fucking three years old. That's smart. That's smart. You have Mark Bryan and I are just playing to have fun in this guy. He's treating it like it's his God damn career. Like it's a real life war. Like, yeah, he's like, this is one more three motherfuckers.
Speaker: This is what Biden's driving us into. Okay, guys, take it seriously. You sound like a guy that gets shot by friendly fire. Mind you, Jeff. I got excited the other day because I unlocked a sword that looks like a Viking sword. And I ran around for an hour and a half with this sword on every map. Chomping, chomping, chomping. That was still so much better when you did that in zombies and the fucking one guy's like, what the fuck?
Speaker: If I do play video games like the kids on the PlayStation you can buy like older games, you know, like It's like like five bucks and they bought this game. It's called Jack
Speaker: adventure or something like that. It's it's really terrible graphics. It was made like in the early 90s and shit. But the wife and kids love this fucking game. There's a spot they couldn't get because the you had to shoot these. It's like, uh, practice, practice, practice discs fly out of the water and you have to move this turret. Well, the controls are reverse. So up is actually down, down is up.
Speaker: And they couldn't get it and it took me like five tries to get it. But I finally got it and they were like, my god, I was like, yeah, I don't play.
Speaker: Our video gaming is so hard. Jeff can't do it. Our good buddy, Jaravicius, is very aggressive when he plays video games, especially when he's playing college. Are you the asshole that grows your controller at the TV? Almost. I literally almost went to Florida yesterday and beat Brian's eyes. Also, I'm pretty sure he has fucking
Speaker: I'm like
Speaker: Good calm down. Mark, Brian fucking, Brian opened this can of fucking worms. That dumb bastard yesterday is telling me, hey, there's a guy to your right and the guy to my right was dead. And Mark's like, hey, there's a guy to your left. And I'm trying to listen to Mark and Brian's like, no, he's to your right. I'm like, Brian, the guy to my right is dead. Mark is facing you. He's like my right, my man.
Speaker: I dare challenge Mark and or Brian to to come up and defend themselves in the nonsensical nonsense. No, fuck Brian. Mark, you're good. Brian, fuck you. No, no, I'm surprised he has it at all. That's why I stopped using plastic controllers. Brian's running around. He's getting, you know, nine, 10 kills. He's happy as could be. I'm running around with the sword. Happy as hell.
Speaker: Lord only knows what Mark, you know, nobody knows what Mark's doing. Brian's getting a couple of kills and we're just having fun. And then there's fucking Steven, Captain Insane over here. We're loving fucking mind to the point where
Speaker: Nicky can hear him through my headphones. She's like, hi, Steven. This is calm the fuck down. All I heard was, hi, Steven. I'm like, mother. Hi, Nicky. No, I didn't. I didn't get told. I'm not allowed to choppy choppy anymore on it on the game. Why? Because everyone can hear it. I was trying to.
Speaker: I also I also have a I unlocked a skin. It's a Rick Grimes skin. So I'm Rick Grimes, bitch. With the Rick Grimes skin, he's just randomly spouting off quotes from the goddamn television show like, get out Carl.
Speaker: Oh, where's the code? I'm like, what are you talking about, bro? Carl's not here. He died. Yeah, he dies kind of a horrible death.
Speaker: A lot of them in that show died horrible deaths. Yeah. I was having fun. Choppy, choppy. The first time he did it, I was just like, what the fuck? What's going on? All of a sudden, I just see Glitch. Oh shit, Glitch got a scored. Yeah.
Speaker: I'm like Mark's like everybody in the chat room. Oh shit. Let's got a sword. Mark was Mark was like, Hey, Steven, what's going on? I'm like, I think Glick's chopping people with the sword or a knife. I don't know yet. He's over by a tree.
Speaker: Oh, the new season it's out and it was another big update and fucking update. Yeah, I know passes out and I'm I'm about to be grinding that battle pass hard as fuck because a your instant unlock is Snoop Dogg. So no way. Yeah, apparently he's he loves that fucking game. Yeah. And you're in your last
Speaker: in your last unlock when you when you clear the battle pass one of the skins you get is finnery uh and it's loki sun from north mythology okay okay fucking werewolf i'm like oh i want that skin i want that skin i'm gonna be a werewolf with a goddamn sword running around somebody somebody needs to get a hold of of the game maker and be like hey you know we need a nonsensical nonsense skin
Speaker: We were talking about that. It comes with a sword. There are some gamers out there like big Twitch gamers and stuff like that. As it kills people, it says kiss my ass and lick my asshole. What baby? They literally called, they literally called Glick to do all the voiceover lines. No, they just, they just clip.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: We're going to give you a 12 pack of beer and a headset and a controller. We just need some one liners. Oh, okay. Here we go. We were going to make a character on you, but we're trying to reach a better demographic. Get the fuck out of here, you nutcase.
Speaker: The red hair blends too badly with the grass. We can't do it. Sorry. Could you imagine them creating a glick skin with some of my random sayings and shit like that? Here we go now. We're not done yet.
Speaker: The second it comes to you on this, so we're uploading a new update. It's got the nonsense, the nonsense. Uh, you now must be a parental consent no matter what your age. I don't give you your 85. You got to get your mom to sign. Sorry. You can't have this one.
Speaker: It'll be the most purchased bundle of all time in Call of Duty. It's like the battle pass. Everyone cares less about the weapons. They just want to get the whole thing just so I can get Glick. You know my character is going to be wearing a championship belt, so. And it's finishing moves. He takes off the belt and beats him to death.
Speaker: And then sits there puts the belt on his shoulder and strokes his beard. I'm the champ, bitch. No, it says nothing. I get a Mortal Kombat character. Is that my fatality? No, I don't know how the fucking game works. Kevin plays fucking Fortnite all the time. He's like, he's funny. When he, when he wins, he goes, I don't know.
Speaker: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm in the middle of a battle. Let me build this building.
Speaker: No, you can turn that off. Yeah, you can turn that off now. Yeah. It's just nice because... Still sounds like a lot of work. I can go in there just to feel good about myself because I can go in there on Fortnite and do the Battle Royal and I can... Meet up on 12 -year -olds all day? I'll shit to her now. What? What did you leave for dinner? What leftovers? Did you? Are you sure?
Speaker: I can't. I can't. I can't. I can't. Hey, you can have whatever you want. Hey, you can have whatever you want. Go ahead. Yeah. Yeah. We approve it. Don't worry about it. Lollipops and cake. Go for it. Go ahead and get rid of these **** real quick. Jarvis. I do. GBA Jarvis. GBA.
Speaker: No, no, they did. They did the new download. They got the new battle passes out. They got a couple of new maps out. Unfortunately, fuck that download shit. Yeah, I couldn't believe how 89 wasn't it like eighty nine eighty eight gigabytes matter. It didn't matter when I downloaded it. I got halfway through or I downloaded it, got into the game, started to go through it all and it went to a black screen several times.
Speaker: they finally fixed it. I was pissed. That sounds like a lot of work. I was fortunate enough that, uh, you know, by the time I got home, it was almost done because as soon as the kids come home, I turn on the X box and it automatically, the next time you go on and it's going to tell you there's another update. Yeah, probably.
Speaker: But I want to play Grow House. Grow House doesn't come out for another six days, six and a half days, but it's a weed house. It's a weed house. It looks like a small map too. So it's like a weed house. When did the Transformers GI Joe thing come out on there? We were talking about that the other day. No, I was talking about the movie itself.
Speaker: Oh, yeah. The next event in six days is the Godzilla Kong event. And I guess I've got a bunch of skittles that they're giving away in the event. So hey, for one thing, I got to say, fuck you, Steven. Fuck you, Mark.
Speaker: Yeah, thank Brian for fucking that one mister. Oh, it's over here How many hours how many hours would you say in the past in a week? Did you guys spend on this fucking game? Well last week I lived on there because I was on vacation I Those fuckers live on that game. I just play the game for a little bit and then go do a different game You're a fucking
Speaker: Ten minutes ten minutes on the fucking PlayStation in six months It sounds like you have a problem
Speaker: You just can't play video games. Now that I'm back to work, I'll get on there for a little bit here and there. I prefer the real thing. And having sex with a woman is always nice too.
Speaker: Just because you got her chained up doesn't make you your woman, Steven. Yeah, that's right. Go ahead. Rage quit, motherfucker. Rage quit, bitch. I'll never hear the end of that one.
Speaker: Oh, you're never going to hear the end of it now. Shut the fuck up. I could have got the last kill. Yeah, but if you would have. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, somebody. Wait, hold on. Explain that to me. So you're telling me because someone was talking, you couldn't play a video game. Yes. How bad is your fucking attention?
Speaker: He said it when somebody else is talking. He said it multiple times while we were playing last night, too. Every time somebody talks in the mic, my brain, you're one of those assholes that turns the radio down to park your car. No, because it helps you arrive to tell us what to do, but we couldn't tell him.
Speaker: No, I'm trying to listen to you and **** Brian's tell me there's a guy that's not even **** to my right but to my left and he's to your right. He's to the right. He said to my right. He said to your left. He said to your left. Well, that was the beginning in the beginning. The first time. It was actually someone coming across. It looked like somebody was
Speaker: I was thinking the cha -cha slide, man. He's like, what up this time? To the left, to the right. Now Chris Groff. Cha -cha, real smooth.
Speaker: don't worry, don't worry. The tape is still being worked on. It is still being worked on. Oh, hold on. Wait a minute. You don't drive with the radio on. No, I usually have I usually do Bluetooth on when I'm driving. He pauses the show when he parks.
Speaker: now i can drive you're like the guy with the biggest stereo on the planet that louis like oh i got it back into this parking spot okay i've got it now now i have done that and then i was like what the fuck am i doing
Speaker: that's that's what i said you know what for for now on jarvis just mute us and then he can play the fact that you listen to these assholes in the first place there's your problem
Speaker: Yeah. I was trying not to get a skill. Mark was literally trying to help me. And he, in the first time we played search and destroy, the guy was to my left. Num Nuts McGee, Brian fucking tells me he's to the right.
Speaker: I've been telling you he's in front of you. We could, no, we literally thought somebody was to the right of you because we seen something. It could have been a glitch or whatever in the game, but there was something. It was like fucking ghosts with the choppy choppy fucking animation.
Speaker: it's a delay there's just click like what
Speaker: He's got one of the a a or one of the opponents from the other one that he killed like fucking come here, bitch Yeah, that's what i'm saying. He's like I don't care the rest of you guys have just watched him going. What the fuck are you doing? Unfortunately for you because you did rage quit you you missed seeing me send jesus straight to hell
Speaker: Wouldn't be the first time don't care. I said rise from, rise from the grave after three days after that bitch. Brian will be lucky if I'm even on that fucking game anymore. Besides that, uh, you know, tormenting, uh, uh, Jarvis here. Um, there was another reason why you fuckers want me to buy it. No, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not promoting it. You know?
Speaker: you know, I'm not promoting it but I actually we'd like to invite you on to the show tomorrow night. Jeff.
Speaker: Oh, who me? No, Jeff don't know any shit about wrestling. Oh, I was going to say, you know, when you want me to stare at the camera for 20 minutes. So so here it is. They don't invite Glick before. But now, since they've kissed each other's ass on Call of Duty, it's like, oh, hey, just to know Steven off some more. You got to give a little to get a little. I'm just saying. Hold up. And yet he said I'm going to be like fucking Glick's. Glick's going to be late anyways. I already know that.
Speaker: We started remember that and we don't go, you know, we don't, 15, 20 minutes after, you know, we started eight. You know, I want to get this, I want to get this show tightened up. I have to get this show tightened up. Um, I would have started at seven o 'clock tonight and thank you, Jeff, for creating the studio.
Speaker: You know, uh, nice title, you know, however, it took me 20 minutes to think of that in 15 minutes to spell it correctly. However, sometimes Jeff is like talking to a wall and you know, when you create a stream yard, you have the description and you can use hashtags and stuff like that. And I tell Jeff, there's three hashtags that I want used every time. Not one of them were you. Well, I take it back. One of them was used and then he just made up a bunch of hashtags. I'm like meatloaf.
Speaker: We use one out of three ain't bad. It's two out of three. Yeah. Well, I'm not fully. I'm like, I'm like half his size. The algorithm into our favor. And I also use nonsensical nonsense because, you know, eventually I want that hashtag to, uh, you know, be, uh, uh, yeah.
Speaker: So, you know, uh, this guy had like, hi world. Sometimes you can come up with some of the weirdest ones and it'll blow up. It'll blow up.
Speaker: Really quick. I had one where I had one that he got really pissed about it. It was hashtag. He is not actually the champ. I didn't even acknowledge that because I saw the tear in your eyes. I just deleted it because it's, it's big bro. And you're like a politician, man. You're, you're putting fake face, fake stuff out there for the world, to the public.
Speaker: and trying to create a narrative on the news. If you want to take narrative, then I suggest you ask a friend of ours for an invite and you can go join us. Join with an invite. I'm just saying. Oh, shit. Now you're fucked, Steven. Oh, my fucking God. I might as well just fucking leave now. Yeah, he's going to rage quit. Shut the fuck up, Jeff. He's still right.
Speaker: Brian, clarify. Was it to the left or right? It was to the left. Listen, this thing was fighting me so bad it was like Steven over here trying to tell me what to do. I was like, let me log in. I was like, come on, bro. Hey, Brian. Brian, where's your game? What's the percentage of your game so far? Oh, fuck. I don't know. Hang on. Let me check. Hang on.
Speaker: it's probably about as much as what is Ponzi schemes making them zero. No, I don't. I downloaded the update and then deleted the whole game because it wouldn't let me on and I did it again and his is still not halfway because I got the Walmart version Xbox. That'll do it. Well, it's your fault. Well, it sounds like you got **** wish version internet. No ****
Speaker: it took about an hour all together
Speaker: do it that way. You know, you know what it is. The thing that Steven has the advantage on from all of us is they probably only have one device on their wifi. Exactly. Yeah. I plugged my Xbox into the router. Yeah.
Speaker: And then everybody in the house, when we're at home, we use, we don't have to, but we use Wi -Fi on our phones. Plus cash has got an Xbox. The girls have got a Roku. Do you have one internet line or two? Because I have two. I have a 5G and I have a regular. I do have two. I've had that internet.
Speaker: for like almost six years. And just a few months ago, I realized that I had a 2G and a 5G and I was. Yeah. And like I, since I set up the password for both through my laptop, I set it up so everybody can use the regular wifi and I use the 5G on my TVs and my computer. Everything else is regular. You guys are fucked.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: Well, I guess technically in the internet companies and your cable companies don't tell you this technically, like every two years you're supposed to go and upgrade your router and they'll give you a new router for free. Yeah. As long as you take the old one in, I didn't know that now I still have the original ones that I've had since I moved back to Ohio and I got my apartment.
Speaker: Um, that's the one good thing about here is they'll call me every two months and ask you if you want the newest update. Yeah, they're supposed to. Because you have to be there. The catch is you have to go into their brick and mortar. Ah, sounds like a lot of work. And it never fails. Every time I go in there, there's nine million people and two employees. Yeah. And those two employees are sitting around shooting a shit and drinking coffee.
Speaker: Yeah, and I'm like, yeah, I'm good. I'll just keep the routers I have. And if you do get in there, you do get somebody you leave with a new router and about 14 other things you don't need. Yeah. You got this new tablet for you. Yeah, fuck you. I got an eye of those bitches just laying around the last time I was here.
Speaker: Hey, did you know that we, uh, we offer cell phone services and it's a customer. You can get five free phones and blah, blah, blah, blah. Oh, the truck, Bob, $25. Well, the catch is after the first month, it goes up to $575 per phone.
Speaker: With my internet, you literally have to combine it to, to actually have it be cheaper. Yeah. Where like, I was just like, could I just get the internet? And they're like, no, it would be over a hundred dollars. I'm like, really? Well, I get the internet and electric together. You know, I don't know. My hamster wheel. I don't know how that works. Yeah. Like the package deal. What the fuck is going on here?
Speaker: I don't have cable. Like I don't have cable TV, but I got 10 cable channels and it's only through the app. You know, so like, it's like internet cable. I have all the basic stuff. And then I got to pick 10 channels and I actually, I've been meaning to call them for like two years now and see if I can change a couple of channels because the kids don't watch Nickelodeon and Disney anymore. You're going to leave the only boy. No, it's a 10 channel. So let me do it.
Speaker: the only people
Speaker: through and they're like look Spongebob's here and everybody in the house except me love just fucking loves Spongebob and they put it on no they they put it on and it was like a weird version of Renan Stimpy version of Spongebob it was fucking fucked up I know this is not the Spongebob we all know what is to the Mexican version of Spongebob no it was it's it's us Netflix but it's like the newest versions of Spongebob
Speaker: No, but it's just like the animation and the and the things that happened to SpongeBob are more Ren and Stimpy style from the 90s than than SpongeBob was like SpongeBob was always this happy go. All I care about is making fucking burgers and shit to him and Patrick got fucking merged together. And it was it really looked like the guys that animated Ren and Stimpy had done the drawing. And I was like, what the fuck? Yeah, they they did one like that.
Speaker: I can't remember the name of it, but yeah, the first five season was only the best ones. I didn't. Yeah. And then, you know, I got my kids on it and then all of a sudden I was like, no, you can't watch it anymore. Yeah. Right. Dad. Okay. Yeah. That's it. Did Ricky ever get to you? Nope. That once. That motherfucker. I've been on, I've been on Facebook best year all day. See if I try to do anything nice for him ever again. Yeah. See, I got it. Did, um, Oh, sorry friend. That's over there.
Speaker: Yeah, Ricky's in fucking yeah, Ricky's down there. And I was like, Hey, Jeff lives there and I reached out to him and he hasn't even seen I don't think he's even seen my message. This guy in his pyramid scheme, he posted on fucking Facebook earlier. He paid for the package for internet. Send that son of a bitch to Ohio and I'll kick his ass for not listening.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: if he needs, you know, he wants to go to a good restaurant or a good tour, you know, hook him up. And I was like, Oh, okay. So I reached out and didn't get an up and back. It seems like a Brian thing to do. No, it's not what I did. I just tried to hook my friend up. Yeah. I've been here so long. First person I'm calling is Jeff. Hey, bro. Can you tell me where I can go or what I need to do?
Speaker: It sounds like it sounds like you you make a lot of friends like Gera Vichy. You tried to help Gera Vichy out. He said, fuck you last night. Sounds like this. This Ricky guy, you tried to help him out and he said the same thing. He's like, yeah, it's for that shit before. And I said in the link. It's a Facebook messenger, just Facebook messenger. Yeah, it's got a it's got a spam. Yeah, they're not friends. It'll send it to the requested area.
Speaker: Uh, and if, and if you don't know, if you don't know that they sent it, you never look. Yeah. Every once in a while I'll be in there and they'll be like, you have four requests and messages and I'll look at them and they're like two years old. It was like, I should probably respond to this person to be like, Hey, what's going on, bro? Uh, he died. My bad. Damn. The guy from happy Gilmore died.
Speaker: Speaking of somebody dying, not on our death list, but, uh, Louis Gossett Jr. died. Yeah. We're talking about that today on the radio on the Mike Calcha show. It was the guy that said the Jackass one. Yeah. He did. Yeah. Like 75 % of like the cameo characters or whatever are all dead.
Speaker: Barker's dead chubs dead the guy who Jackass is dead jaws from bond is dead I was I was hooked to find out I could have swore the guy that played the main villain was dead Shooter McGowan. No, yeah, I think I've died He'll be on this part too. He'll be in it has to be or else it'll be a fucking ruined. I
Speaker: Yeah, he worked fucking perfectly. The guy who played Shooter McGavin was the one that broke the news that there was a Happy Gilmore 2 coming. Back it out. Even before Netflix got to it.
Speaker: And then we're getting a little Nicky too on Netflix as well. Yeah, I'm not sure. Well, I think the thing is like Adam Sandler signed that deal with Netflix for like a billion dollars. And they're like, just keep sending it. He's only got two more movies left on that deal. I bet you tend to one Billy Madison too is coming next. That'll be tight. Don't ruin it. You can't ruin little Nicky. You know what?
Speaker: still that goddamn hippie to get a fucking haircut. That's Citrus County Jesus, bud. Yeah. Get a haircut. Get a real job. Clean your act up like your big mother, Bob.
Speaker: I made it by mission. When I seen that his name was Jesus, his gamer tag was Jesus to hunt this dude down and kill him over and over and over again. I could see it's like going like, come here, Jesus, I got to crucify you again. Dude, Jesus was in our group last night twice. And what was the other guy, Pepe? No, no, no, no, no, boss hog. And Godzilla was in there a lot with us too.
Speaker: who? Godzilla. Those mother they were probably running a fucking a three way. Yeah, I know that sounds weird. But that's probably why they're running a squad. Brian, not a three way. We were running a foursome and then one of our foursome got by. Okay, you know what, let's fuck off. You know, we got our asses handed to us. It was like four on a
Speaker: Apparently it's all because one person can't tell their left from their right.
Speaker: I don't know. It could be one or the other person. It's never been established. I was literally sitting in the first map that we did of the search and destroy. I'm literally sitting there and he's like, he's to the right. I'm like, Brian, the guy to the right. That's a wall. No, no, no. There was a guy and he was the wall. There was no other guy to the right. Even Mark said, even Mark said, yeah, there's one right there.
Speaker: It's all jokes, buddy. Calm down. It's not a penis. Don't take it to heart. I couldn't believe that Stacey actually did better than her husband did. So wait, her husband's here. She got one kill sniping, bro. Dude, still better than what you could have done sniping. Met her up as a sniper. She said, I could change my class. How do you do that?
Speaker: I'm about ready to be done with this. No, I didn't. No, you're not.
Speaker: I just love when she was like, I got a kill. And then Glick, Mark, and me were just like, yeah. We're like, everyone on the enemy team can now just uninstall because Stacey got that kill. Oh hell, it's raining again. That was a whole lot more than I've ever done. Yeah, for sure. A lot better than your husband's ever done, too. Whatever. I did pretty well the other night. I don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker: He does all right. Yeah. When you rage quitted, we almost fucking took the whole fucking thing. Yeah. Okay. We really did. It was like, it was like, yeah, we didn't lose that bad. Actually, I think Brian had the most kills on our squad. He was running around. I mean, search and destroy the final round. I, however, the final round I did get gang bang.
Speaker: It was like four on one and I took, I took three of them out before the fourth one got me. So I was like, and the only reason his ass got me is because I ran out of ammo and I was like, mother fuck. And yet had, you know, someone not said what they said earlier. And then, you know, Steven fucking go off the hinges, like Macho man, Randy Savage doing the line of Coke, you know, you were yelling at everybody. So I won't hear that.
Speaker: No, I wasn't yelling at Glick. He was yelling at me. And I wasn't yelling at you, Mark. The only person I yelled at was Brian because Brian was being a bitch. Hey, listen, Stephen, if you want to talk to me, you can take it up my chain of command. How about that?
Speaker: Oh, okay. I'll go up the Ponzi scheme. I'm sorry. Sorry, Brian. I'm the golden and Steven has his nose buried so far up by. Yeah. Cause I'm the one that's like the WrestleMania show, but I'm not going to invite Glick. Oh, Hey Glick, come on our show tomorrow. Oh yeah. I got my nose buried. No, no, no. I never said that we were never inviting him. He said that he would be in the comments. Uh -huh.
Speaker: make it his prediction, sir. I mean, we want everybody in the comments as much as possible because we'd like to do. Well, we want to, we want to have a good read too. So when people are posting stuff, you know, we want you to make your pigs, but you got to make Friday night is the hall of fame, right? Also, let's be honest.
Speaker: I've made both of them feel so bad that Mark felt obligated to invite me on the show. And then tomorrow at like 6, like 7 .55, I'll be like, bro, I wish I could do your show. But, uh, yeah, I mean, I'm only, I'm gonna be like a hundred dollars an hour. Well, that's like, yo, I was going to do your show, but I got a hemorrhoid. So that's more important. I was going to do your show, but I'm hanging out with a couple of puppets tonight.
Speaker: They got more interesting conversation. But I'm hanging out with this Jarvis just because I've got my arm show so hard up his ass. We got this lady you got to get on the show, man. She is absolutely the best tarot card reader ever. Oh my god, no. We're going to get you hooked up with Miss Angie.
Speaker: Mark, you got her number still, she wants to be on the show. I have a feeling as soon as that's announced, Jeff's gonna be like, ooh, I have a calling now. I was gonna say, you do realize, I will put her on the show and I will have so much fun with her because those tarot card readers and stuff like that, do I believe, yes, to a certain degree, but also at the same time,
Speaker: Yeah, my daughter was like 13 and she had a tarot card deck and she was down there like flipping card. Oh dad, you're going to die. Yeah, that's what we're all going to die. We had we had two card readers. One was a well, thanks daughter. I never knew that was going to happen on a time and she was different than
Speaker: already already was great I mean he pinpointed a lot of stuff so we never gave him any information until except for the fact everything is on your Facebook you're you know a little bit of research I can find out shit too no no okay did you find out what Mark's uh twins middle name was gonna be well mark no one gives a fuck no my son would have been a twin
Speaker: but the other one in the womb. We believe so. My son could actually have two sets of DNA in him. The ones done ate the other one. That's what we call Darwinism. Survivor, the strongest. See, on my Facebook, I don't tell, you know, I can tell you somebody had passed away. I'm not going to tell you why on my Facebook. You want to know, you messaged me, I'll tell you.
Speaker: But I don't use the page that goes, I need my prayer warriors and good vibes in my life. No, no, no, no. My broker is that is that guy like he'll post your shit just to get attention. And then people will be like, oh, my God, what's wrong? Is everything all right? And I'm like, but then there goes my message. Fuck you. Yeah. I mean, this guy told me how my friend Rick passed away.
Speaker: He went down the list. He even told me what my child's middle name would have been if he or she was born. Oh, wow. The whole thing was, he didn't say middle name. He just said, hey, who is? And then Mark was like, Mark's eyes just got really fucking big. And I was like, Mark, I don't know that person. You know that person? He was like,
Speaker: uh yeah i'll tell you when we get off of here when my and like mark was like yeah he was a boy and he called me he was like uh yeah if he was if he was a boy his middle name would have been joseph if it was a girl his middle name would have been rose or her middle name would have been rose hey that's my he picked up the rose name it's click's middle name that's my real name
Speaker: Joseph Rose. The one thing that hasn't come true yet. My middle name is Rose. The only thing that has not come through that the guy said is something about us doing a comedy. Some type of comedy show. Might be putting it together or what and that's where. We're on one right now. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Something totally different.
Speaker: He was, we are the greatest comedy podcast on the planet. You want to see, you want to see Brian's reaction. Watch tomorrow night at eight o 'clock and watch him for watch right after the intro is done because he's going to tell me it was too long. It's a mini intro then.
Speaker: First of all, this is this is official. His life had the issue of being too long. Let's be honest. An intro is not supposed to be more than like 45 seconds. This one is a minute 30 and it's once you see it, you'll understand amateurs.
Speaker: A minute 30. Like I literally see Brian go on like these podcasting websites where it's these people that barely get a credit card. It's like our actual our actual intro to the show is three minutes long. Exactly. Oh, yeah. And then and then, you know, and like I said, Jeff made a really good video. I do like the video that Jeff made. Well, it's an A .I. video. Jeff just had to put the shit into the generator. No, I like that. I really did.
Speaker: Yeah, I like that all the time. The only reason I played tonight was because we were running a little behind on when I want to start. Jeff actually did something. Well, there's that. And, and I, and I still needed to do a lot. Well, I needed that extra couple of minutes so that I could get to the Twitter. You're still playing on cod when you were supposed to be doing it.
Speaker: No, I wasn't I was actually off the call of duty at six thirty. No, that's not correct mark I mean, I was still trying to I was still trying to fuck get my game to work It finally got the update that I needed so I no longer got a black screen Yeah, and Jeff said a snapchat and said hey I got the studio ready and I was like cool however Walking into I had that
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: So evidently my daughter is now a lawful permanent resident alien. A what? That's what she worked on her gun concealment application. Wait a minute. What she did to improve? Dude, I'm scared now we're going to have an alien awful carrying a fucking gun now. Dude, I got to find out how much it's going to cost to get binary nude in December.
Speaker: You do hear, uh, South Carolina speaking about bucks. Actually, before I roll into that, I just happened to look at the clock. So we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, uh, continue the mindless shatter for a minute. But, um, what does she go get her CCW? Yeah. My, my, my kid just took the class and, uh, her, her fiance. So they're doing their paperwork for it.
Speaker: and she was sitting at the table and she comes in here and she goes, oh my God, I just marked, I started to mark that I was a resident permanent alien. I was like, I'm pretty sure you're not though. Somebody give me the white out. No, you got to reprint it, dude. You got to reprint it. Hey, this doesn't have fingerprints. So this is going to be fun. I know who I'm calling the hired when I need somebody.
Speaker: Anything goes wrong. You guys know where to come to stay. I'm just saying Nonsense go nonsense What make sure you use promo code words are hard. You'll get a discount on your head Is out there I've teamed up with with with a local entrepreneur I'll call him Words are hard you're gonna get your first purchase
Speaker: purchase for free. However, when you get arrested for that purchase and you need bailed out, you can call Blix bail bonds. Use promo code words are hard. That's great. And many of other businesses as well. We're locked into the community now, right? We're gonna have to have Stacy use a promo code on the food truck for talking shit or nonsensical nonsense.
Speaker: You know, we need we need to have it for our shirts. We make a nonsensical nonsense combo and if they use the promo code, they get a discount on it. Oh, I got to see her menu. We can come up. And what you got to do is you put the QR code on the side of the truck for the show, too. We have it on our stickers. Does she does she do? Does she do like combos or is it just like
Speaker: You can make something a combo, but most of that stuff that she does, so like if you get a burrito, that son of a bitch is already packed full of french fries. We should both have, like you guys should have like a talking shit burrito. We should have a nonsensical nonsense burrito. Yeah, ours comes with shrimp. And it's called shrimp.
Speaker: Uh, but we're going to call this job. She did shrimp one time in a, in a, in a pot for her in a pan and other people were still like, and she did it for shrimp up a loser, which is fucking great. Cause it's a shrimp fest and she didn't sell not one shrimp that day.
Speaker: I was like, listen, this is a $17, $17, $18 burrito. Ryan's eating shrimp for a fucking month going, these motherfuckers. It was the surf and turf burrito. And I thought it was fantastic. And nobody got it. Fuck, I love surf and turf, man. Fuck, yeah, me too. You guys should come up to Ohio for the summer because we do, up on the square here where I live, we do a cruise in every weekend or every other weekend. And it's all like the classic cars.
Speaker: And then they bring in all the food trucks and they line them up around the square, bro. Yep. The heart of Ohio. Nobody wants to go up to Ohio. Nobody wants to go to Minnesota, Ohio. And I could be like, not only did Stacy eat or cook for me, but I ate her. I ate her.
Speaker: You ate her? Just a slight hiccup in between. I ate her. Hey, Brian, did you know about this? I had no clue. Brian was right there. He told me how to eat. He told me how to eat. He was like... He was sitting in a chair at the other bedroom going,
Speaker: yeah just like that daddy if you heard it this way you get more flavor oh okay i'm not a cook stop it no no jeff he's oh brian's over there like oh wow that's why they call him a champ you're right brian this is a delicious burrito i'm over there going to the left click to the left
Speaker: I keep going to the right and yelling at you. Then you rage quit and storm out of there. This is bullshit. I can concentrate with all this noise.
Speaker: Well, no, the rules say that this is another fucking non -media game. And it will be used against you. You guys try to get your bunny back on Call of Duty? Oh, hell yeah. Why not? You cheap bastard. Oh, go fuck yourself, Mickey Amazing. How much is this stupid fucking game? Yeah, you can. 70 bucks. You got 30 days. No, you don't. Yeah, you do. No, you don't. Sure you do. If you open a game, you are not lucky. No, no, no. He didn't. I have the digital. Digital. So you can return that to, uh.
Speaker: Microsoft. I texted you earlier, by the way, Jarvis. I hope that you got my message. I wasn't trying to be a smart ass or anything, but I know I was just a bunch of left arrows. Yeah. All the text, instead of being to the left, like normal people would do it, it's all to the right and it's all fucking backwards. Was it a gift of Beyonce going to the left to the left? No, to the right to the right this time.
Speaker: but anyway yeah download and make sure that you're ready for this it only took like 35 minutes to download an 89 must be nice that you live next to the fucking mcdonald's wi -fi fucking hotspot
Speaker: Hey, I don't even have a McDonald's near me. I've already I've already got my Wisconsin. Nothing's near you. No, it's Minnesota and it's near me. Same difference. The battle pass. I'm grinding the battle pass. I'm going to get this because your instant reward is Snoop Dogg. And then there's a FINRA at the end of it. So I'm going to. Yeah, I already got them. Okay. Did you buy the battle pass already, Mark?
Speaker: Yeah, the $10 one. You bought it? Oh, that means I get it too. Should. Should. No, no limit. No, he doesn't get it. Only the game because he bought it. You've game. It doesn't matter if you game share it, but he buys through the game. You don't get it. Just only care. Only characters you get. I think through that because we game share through it.
Speaker: The show is doing really well. Mark just spent 10 bucks. There's not a lot of great weapons. There's like three new sniper rifles. There's a really cool sold off shotgun. And then my choppy choppy has a new blueprint, which actually looks really fucking cool. So I can't wait to have that. They should do like a Highlander bundle on that game. Why? Why? You plan on getting a brief one so it won't matter.
Speaker: Yeah. Well, I'll still play the game. He got the hard copy. He's going to he's going to take it to fucking Best Buy and they're going to be like, I did not get the hard copy. I got the digital game. The best we can do for you is digital on the box. Yeah. Hey, I posted the PS4 for sale today. So let's see how that goes. I haven't had that one person fucking because no one wants a PS4 for it.
Speaker: how much you want for 200 bucks with 250 with six games no wonder why no one wants no no I listed it for 225 but I'll take 200 for it for with with
Speaker: The guitar, the three controllers. I'll give you 100 bucks for just the console. What's up, Leggy? What's up, Leggy? You don't want the console. I got 200 pennies I can cash up you. Yeah. I'll send you 200 pesos.
Speaker: I don't want 200 pennies. I don't want 200 pesos. I'm pretty sure what I heard Stacey say was you can get the new Xbox as soon as you sold the PlayStation 4. That is correct. So I wouldn't turn down the 200 pennies because that's selling it. I don't need a PS4 but I'll be willing to take the hit to help a brother out.
Speaker: he's still won't get the new Xbox because again it's in the nonsensical court of law if it's said then we you have to adhere to it so she as long as you hold it that he can buy the new Xbox I heard it consider it consider it sold yep checks in the mail yeah I got 200 for it yeah yeah there you go hundred pennies
Speaker: Don't tell her pennies. Just say, yeah, we gave you 200. She said that ain't going to work for her. We're not talking to her right now. Yeah. She's right here listening. I can't. No, we're close our ears. Ryan's ex -wife used to ignore him all the time. What's the problem? Chris's ex -wife, I mean. Ryan could not get a new Xbox until he sold the PS4. That's what I heard, too.
Speaker: the PS4 is sold so you can get it in the Xbox. Yeah and then I got another Xbox that I have to sell too but I can't find the fucking cords for it. But I got like the cords for like 10 bucks. You know what I'll take both for 300. 300 dollars you got it. 300 pennies. 300 pennies. 300 doll hairs. Yeah yeah. Listen you guys keep it up I'm gonna go back to I'm gonna revert back to my fucking Nintendo.
Speaker: I got one of those. Please do. Did you guys know that we did you guys know that we put? Let me ask you a question. When you put the game in on Nintendo, how'd you do it? You put push it in and what you do next? Then you push it down. You know you're not supposed to. What are you supposed to do? Push it in. That's all you were supposed to do. Push it in. No bullshit, huh? Mine never worked that way.
Speaker: Yeah, mine did neither. If we didn't push it down, it would be black screen. Yeah. Nope. Push it in. As soon as it clicks, you're good to go. Okay, hold up. Wait, wait, wait. How old is your Nintendo? It's the very first generation Nintendo. Okay, I'll have to test it on mine. Test it out. I have the retro version.
Speaker: I have the retro version that's like palm size. Everything's already built in. It's got all the games and everything. Yeah, you don't have to put a game in it. Yeah. Well, I've missed those days of going to the store and buying a fucking box that was not me. I have to leave the house. That's a bad day. Period. And I got to address like here real quick. She thought podcast. You think you were on. We're serious. We're serious. Like he gets it like he gets it.
Speaker: Well, when we come back from break, we're going to talk politics and misquote people in. Oh my God. Can we not talk politics, please? I'll be back with a suit. Yes. Real nice. I bet you look good as Ellen a suit.
Speaker: Do I look good in a suit? I used to when I had hair. You look like Walter White in a suit. I imagine Brian showing up in a suit, like he's got the pants cut off.
Speaker: But they're uneven they're uneven because he did it that like right before leaving the house Like a wish version of stone cold Steve Austin
Speaker: I'll have to find some pictures. We went to a speakeasy, and I think my wife's got some photos of us dressed up in 1930s garb. Nice. Nice. 1920s. Excuse me, I'm surprised. That's all you need to do. That's what she said. Yeah, you did. Hey, you got a drink that you want to tell us about there, Glick?
Speaker: No, he finished it like 20 minutes ago. What's going on, blazin'? Yeah, we don't talk politics on here, and if we do, it's just to make fun of the masses. Whoa, hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, who
Speaker: Brian, send us send us the menu from the food truck. We'll come up something. OK. What you guys doing, Scotland? I'm not judging. Hey.
Speaker: that's exactly what he said last night. I said I'm done. I was hiding under that dead body the whole time, boys. I literally thought you left the party and I was like, okay, well, he just left the party. So, it'll be back in a minute. And then I look at him like, this motherfucker left the game.
Speaker: I was like, we're going to fucking die. Oh, I didn't want to buy the fucking game. It's all. I'm just saying, Jeremy, see, I don't want to be in a foxhole with you ever. You can't read. Facts out of facts, facts out of facts. Day one, I'm going to friendly fire you. It's all problem solved. I was I was I was making Mark for us to play hardcore so I could shoot Jarvis last night.
Speaker: Brian said there, oh, you should buy the game. It's like, you don't want me on that game. You don't. Oh, you'd be such a pleasure to have on that game. And it'd be so fun. Oh, shit. I'm sorry, Leggy. I'm sorry to hear about that. Oh, that's horrible. Sorry to hear about your friend. Sorry about that, to hear about that, Leggy. Way to bring the show down, Leggy. I was going to say, I don't have any jokes for that. Jesus Christ.
Speaker: Yeah. Help me off with the fucking ankles. I'm using. Like you said, watch this. Okay. Ready? He break in three, two. Mark, do you send those stickers out? No, I'm just teasing. I am sorry for your loss, Lakey. You sent those stickers out? Yes, I do have hair. Mark. And yes, I said. It's not fucking Mark that. Who'd you send them to?
Speaker: I sent Glick, I sent Steven and Alyssa, Jamie Hill, and a few others. Did you guys get your stickers yet? He mailed them on what day? No, I mailed yours on Monday. I mailed. It was last week, so however.
Speaker: Lick should be getting his tomorrow. I will say this, actually, I'll say it when we come back from break. I mean, it's still going to be the same. We'll take a quick break. We're going to come back. We got the guys from Talking Shit hanging out with us tonight, surprisingly. Well, not surprisingly, but surprisingly. We love our guys from Talking Shit. We do enjoy hanging out with them. We only came on here to give Steven shit.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: I hear either I hear that, you know, I don't have a fucking up light and then when I have too much light that it's never fucking good enough. No, I'm I'm worried about your eyeballs, bro. That is fine. I'm starting to turn into an angel. I was going to lean forward enough. You kind of look like Liggy just. Yeah, I was going to say, I might need sunglasses, but if I'm laying back like this, I'm fine. Even it's far from an angel. Shut the fuck up, Mark.
Speaker: We can have a glow off between Steven and Lady. Yeah, apparently has me at the right time of day. But no, I do want to take a real quick break. And shit, what the hell was I going to talk about? What was I going to bring up? What were you just wanting to say I was going to do? Oh, the stickers. The stickers. Yes. And in a conversation that Mark and Jarvis and I had the other day when we were playing Call of Duty.
Speaker: Just let it go. But we're going to take a real quick break. Before we go to break, I want to tell you guys about our good friends over at Liquid IV. We're speaking in the sun. And we will make sure you guys are properly hydrated as the springtime and everything right around the corner. They're on over to liquidiv .com.
Speaker: Make sure you use promo code words are hard. We're gonna make sure you're properly hydrated. Not only that, but you're gonna find a flavor you enjoy because there's plenty of flavors to pick from. And just a couple little fun facts real quick for you. 16 ounces of water mixed with one packet of liquid IV is gonna hydrate you two times faster than water alone.
Speaker: times faster, I'm sorry, three times the electrolytes than those leading sports drinks and five essential vitamins. So real people, real flavor, real hydrating, liquidib .com use promo code words are hard when you shop better hydration today. Gentlemen, guess what I got for you guys tonight? Is it a new song? I got new music and it's not from Blacktop Mojo.
Speaker: They don't want to come on our show anymore. Yeah, because I've played their last five new singles. No, it's actually it's actually brand new music. And I will be playing Blacktop Mojo later on because their album comes out in two days. But it is brand new from from our guys over and over and out. Nice. They have their single that just dropped the other day. We haven't made a video yet. But when they do have the video, I'll have that uploaded.
Speaker: This is uh over and out wipe out featuring Vinnie on fire. We'll be back here just a few minutes.
Speaker: What's all this for?
Speaker: And their sound of nightmares they're lost
Speaker: Why am I stopped falling through the floor? Can you hear me? Can you hear me? Do I need this light? Take this money to my grave? There's only something in me! Will you call my name? There's no sense of it
Speaker: We got some buddies. Our buddies. Our buddies. Our buddies. We got some buddies. My buddy. My buddy. Our friends are when I was younger. Right. I got one. I never got one. Instead, I got a my pet monster. Nice. I got and I still have it. I I have both of my pet monster and my football monster or my football monster. Nice. All I gotta do is get the handcuffs
Speaker: you know, $1 ,200 easily. Um, I had, I had a, my buddy, I know I had a pet monster, I think. And I had the one that had the football helmet as well. That was a, but anyways, that was our guys are over at a over and out over in like in out with their new single wipeout.
Speaker: I love that shit, man. Poor Matt, lead singer of Over and Out, dealing with some food poisoning. Unfortunately, they had a, I think they had a show tonight that he had to cancel. However, Jackson and the guitar player, I don't know what the guitar player's name is. He's a new, he's a new member of the band. They were going to be playing with a couple other bands at the venue tonight. And Matt was going to be there hocking merch, but go check them out. Go show them some love.
Speaker: the guys know we sent you. Welcome back to nonsensical nonsense everybody. We got Jerry V. She in the building. Hey, yo. It's at night apparently. Jesus fucking Christ. Everyone's fucking saying, oh, you look like you're squint. I think it's so agro all the time, bro. Yeah. We got Jeff in the building. He's in witness protection somewhere in a cave. You guys know me. I'm the I am the champ. I am Glick. I'm the host of this train wreck and
Speaker: Oh, shout out to both the members. We got both the guys building from talking shit. Just because they can't spell doesn't mean that we don't like it. There is no way at the end of that. Hey, Brian, sit your ass down for me. Um, I have our next week's guest already.
Speaker: Surprise. Oh, I'm not saying it on here. You guys have to wait until tomorrow to find out. Perfect. I can't wait for somebody else to announce that and they actually get to go home. Yeah, good luck with that. You can have him. He can tell us about the pyramid scheme, right?
Speaker: I don't know. Fortunately for me and maybe unfortunately for you, what you guys don't know is that Jeff is a part of a package deal. And you buy one Jeff and you get a jerry Vichy for free. We can't. That's the deal breaker.
Speaker: It's not a deal breaker for me. I'm good with that. I'm teasing you Jarvis. I still want to say a big fuck you to the guys over at small packages deluxe or whatever the hell you guys call yourselves. Thanks for letting these guys go and letting us have the opportunity to have some real talent around, you know, outside of myself, but you know, I'm stuck with Jeff and Connor. So now I got some real talent around. Yes, it takes a lot of, lot of talent to actually order a belt online and then wear it.
Speaker: Hey, they never knew Sasquatches could do it, Jeff, okay? It's the internet. It was shocking, even to the people he ordered the belt from. Ooh. We have rumors in the chat. It's blinding you again. It's blinding. Shut up, Brian. The lady and Jeremy, she in the same room, huh?
Speaker: Well, I mean, I mean, if me, it's like, why? So you need help. Brian. Anyways, welcome back to the nonsense. Everybody. Jervis, do you have Jervis? Should you have lady chained to the same radiator as your wife? Well, that'd be interesting seeing as how we don't have a radiator in our fucking apartment. Oh, no, but he's got a basement in his apartment. Yeah.
Speaker: No, I don't. Every time he goes to the basement, he's like, uh, I have to go check on the storage unit, AKA his wife. Well, if I don't show up on Saturday show, everyone, you'll know why.
Speaker: You guys, hey, Alyssa said you guys are married as fuck, period. But, welcome back. Well, she didn't say fuck, she said, as an app, period. Hey, look, jackass. I understand what you're saying. Okay, a Sasquatch, oh my God, everyone, a Sasquatch actually knew what a human said. Let me explain. Get him, get him, Steven, get him, get him. Oh, I got him. We're good. He's to the left.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: on all the social medias. We are everywhere. Don't forget, we do do the show live every Wednesday and Saturday night on YouTube, Twitch, and Facebook. And you can also listen to replays wherever you listen to podcasts that all at nonsensical nonsense, or you can simply run your happy asses right on over to bio .link slash nonsensical nonsense. All of those social media links are there. Just give them a click, hit the follow button, hit the notifications button, hit the like button and hit the share button. It's that easy.
Speaker: Oh my God, we talked, we said something about politics and look who joined. Well, I will apologize for this thing right here. I know it's got to be driving everybody fucking crazy. I keep looking at it. I'm like fucking stop. Will you? Like I want to move it. Let's cover that up. I just want to know where the false advertising work and fuck you, Brian.
Speaker: Hola, Senor Tony D. We've already said his name once, don't say it two more times. Who's Tony D? Oh my God, he said it one more time and he'll show up on the show. Who is Tony D? What's a Tony D? What's a Tony D? What's the D stand for? I don't even know.
Speaker: Anyways, the words you're looking for are, anyways. Moving on. All right, well, I'm just going to be over here. Before we went to break, we were talking about Brian or Mark sending out stickers. By the way, Brian. Yeah. They're not laced or anything. Just let you know. You don't have to lick the back. Well, I don't want one now.
Speaker: I want you guys to know, I want you guys to know I went out and I bought a new cup, not a Stanley, but it looks like a Stanley at Walmart because I have a whole mess of stickers that I've been holding on to for a while. So I went out and I bought this cup mainly for the sole purposes. I'm going to put your guys's logo on it, but I've got like these guys is where I get all my beard products from, Mad Viking, even though they, uh,
Speaker: People want to talk about sponsoring the show, but then nobody wants to respond back. I got some W energy stickers, you know, and I want to throw on there or W or W action. Uh, I got an old school, uh, what the hell did I do with that? I don't know what I do with it. I don't know where it's at, but I've got an old school, um, from my, my very first show on Periscope, uh, vape and chill. Um, I have a vape and chill sticker somewhere added in here. I don't know where it went.
Speaker: But I'm just going to load this cup up with stickers. But shout out to Brian for hitting me up at that link for where you guys got your stickers at. That's probably been the best. It's probably been the best for a lot of everything I've seen online.
Speaker: I mean, so far, so far, and the sticker quality is really good. Um, they're, they're not as big as I'd like them to be. I wanted a little bit bigger, but I'm good with every girl could say the only thing that are you serious? Right. The only thing Brian wasn't able to get on it. He wanted to.
Speaker: Yeah, but here's the thing. I think we'll do, I think we'll do something a little bit different later. So, so Brian wants, so Brian wants bigger stickers, shorter intros. Yes. Thank you. Well, this is the only intro that I think I've done. That was over. That's a minute 30. Uh, most of the other ones have been short, a lot shorter. Oh, so I got plenty of time to be late. Yeah. How is your nap?
Speaker: She's awake. Quick, Nicki's awake. Everybody shut up. Stop talking about her. You were fucking gone to the world. I thought there was a chainsaw over there. She was gone. She was choppy, choppy over there. She's getting rehabbed into the world of daytimeers, as she said.
Speaker: uh with her new job but um so the other the other night we were playing Call of Duty and Mark was like click what is your name and I was like click he was like no Christopher what's his last name that's what I wanted to know yeah my last name's Glick my first name's Chris it is a super white name everybody my entire life has called me Glick I have a really cool like he said I
Speaker: Like he said, I have a really cool last name, but a super fucking lame first name. So like everybody, you know, bosses, employees, what everybody's always called me Glick. So Mark was like, well, you might get your stickers because I just wrote Glick on it.
Speaker: I was like, don't worry, the mailman knows me. Well, even before you hopped in the party, he's like, hey, Stephen, since you know Glick, what's his last name? And I'm like, Glick, whatever. You know what? At first, actually, at first, he says, I'm not sure. I believe it is Glick. Well, it's like, it's Glick, but don't quote me on that because I was like, I mean, you didn't. I'm not sure. His last name is so much longer. It's like literally like,
Speaker: per Glickerson or something. What? Actually, he used a part of his last name. Actually, stop, Brian. Just stop. Yeah. Nerd alert. I'll be a nerd for a second. Actually, my last name. I'm not making fun of anybody. I swear to God, this was my original last name through my heritage or whatever from what I've seen.
Speaker: Yeah, at lineage and whatnot. It was actually Glückenstein. See? I'm sorry, Glückenstein. It was Glückenstein. And then it was shortened to Glück, which is the Jewish word for prosperity and money and luck. And then when my ancestors or whatever came to America, it was Americanized into Glück.
Speaker: There's actually three different versions of my last name.
Speaker: Oh, I'm a nerd because I'm trying to educate people. Fuck you, Jeff. Wait, wait, wait. Jeff, you forgot one. He had to explain it a little bit longer than what he normally does. Yeah, but it wasn't a joke. Therefore he didn't have to explain.
Speaker: Where's my shovel? He would have been like, listen, it's this last name. It comes from, you know, German folklore, blah, blah, blah. Glick is known from the Scandinavian term for the champ.
Speaker: You know, I don't want to say much and I don't mean to, I don't mean to brag or anything like that, you know, but yeah, you know, the French version is leg champion. And, and, and I gave that to Chris Jericho because he's a bitch. And I knew he was just going to whine and cry if I didn't let him do it. So I was like, fuck it. You can do it. You know, cry baby, you're a fat bastard.
Speaker: Stick to your stick. Listen, he literally has let himself go. Well, he's not fat anymore. He's got those implants. I was thinking about getting the same ones. My fucking head though. Can't have gotten him, Ryan. Why? Stick, stick to your, stick to your, listen here you 60 year old man. Stick to your leather pants you Vince Neil want to be. Oh hey, I would say you want to be on the show?
Speaker: Shut up, Brian. I'm a little late to the party. Well, that's what I told Mark. I said, first name Glick, last name Glick. He was like, oh, whatever. Or if you're not into that, you can call him El Glicko. Oh, hey, Nikki, since Glick
Speaker: completely didn't even show that Alyssa said hi to you. Hi. Alyssa said hi. She's from the bed. She's not doing very well with this morning. She's had this waking up in the early morning stuff is whooping her ass. She's not a morning bird. What's the new gig? Yeah, you know. Choppy, choppy.
Speaker: She's doing a little bit of this, a little bit of that, you know, she's working the day's grades. No, no, she's actually, she actually, she's got a job at an eye doctors, which is, she's got what, seven, eight years, eight years experience working in an optical. So it's eye doctors right down the road from us. And she's basically going to be their jack of all trades there. So she's going to do a little bit of everything.
Speaker: Um, she just started Monday, but, uh, she's liking it. She likes the doctors. She likes the people she works with and stuff like that. So that's a good thing. Well, I guess I'm quitting tomorrow cause I hate everybody. Yeah. She's super close to home. I mean, she gets an hour for lunch every day. She could literally drive home, eat, read a book and go back to work. Oh, that girl ain't going to read no books. She's coming home and taking a nap and then going back to work.
Speaker: She could do that too. That if he's late, she'd just be like, oh, my stomach hurt. Hey, Jeff, how many books do you think she's read since she's, was those were since she moved in, right? No, that's since I got my Kindle in May. Okay, so since she got her Kindle last May, how many books do you guys think she's read? I'd say over 30. She laughed at you, Jeff.
Speaker: How many books? How many books? I didn't read it, my bad. I'll say 50.
Speaker: Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
Speaker: the the
Speaker: Oh, shit.
Speaker: Hey, Brian, how many books do you think since she got her Kindle? I said I said is that plus or minus one hundred? That's what I said. So I'm not giving you an answer, but I'm giving you a year yet. She's read two hundred and twenty god damn books. Jesus fucking Kindle. She hasn't read read Ulysses yet.
Speaker: discount on glasses. She said, Jess, cause she hates, I'm with you. Why do you think I took my kids to, uh, we, my kids and I, we went to, uh, the hell's that place called America's best free eye exam, two pairs of glasses for 80 bucks. But a big, that ain't bad at all.
Speaker: That's just for 300 and $400 and some odd with a three, 20, six, six, 40, six, 80, six, 80. All four of us got two pair of glasses for $680. I think I got like six pair of glasses floating around here. I think I paid $5 a pair. We haven't America's best around us. I just fucked up that math. 80 and 80. That's one 60.
Speaker: and 80 is 240 and 80 is 320. So, either you got **** or you can't math. 160. Probably both. 80 dollars per person. Yeah. He says that's right. Yeah. 320.
Speaker: Oh, and I need the question. You know, there's this great thing they have added to laptops, Chris. It's called a fucking calculator between five people plus the chatter's box and do math and then everything else. Look, I'm one goddamn person, right? I do need an advocate stamping easy. Remember that, Jeff. Glicken ain't easy. God damn it. That too. In the sky.
Speaker: I can go twice as high. Yeah, no shit. It's in our book. Reaching by and putting the cheddar spots. I used to love that show. Is that show still even on? Well, no, I was always pissed when they end. They're like, oh, so I tried.
Speaker: That's like Magic School Bus back in the day. I wonder if that show's still on. Never watched it. I believe it is. Really? You've never watched Magic School Bus, Jeff? It's 211. It's 211. That was on EBS. I remember. I remember when I was growing up, if we were lucky, we had three channels because we lived out in the middle of nowhere. The wind blew, you'd lose two of them. Yeah, that's right.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: they, like we were talking about cable earlier, they, they have a package where they're like, do you want TV too? And I'm like, why? We have all the fucking streaming services. I have the fucking internet. Oh, that's okay. That's okay. My, my, uh, my middle one was all pissed off yesterday because she couldn't watch fucking walking dead. And, and I was like, you do realize that we have shutter.
Speaker: 30 other goddamn streaming networks. And she's like, there's nothing to watch. I'm like, you've watched The Walking Dead. The only problem comes down to one thing, finding something to watch. Walking Dead 10 goddamn times from beginning to end. Yeah, I couldn't do that. Now, as somebody that's watched Game of Thrones to the point where I haven't memorized, but The Walking Dead is an OK show. But that first season's hard.
Speaker: It's a good show. Look at the poppers. What to get is a hard show to get through the first season. Pick the glass up instead of just watching it fall down the stairs. What the fuck? Everybody on the show just went, what the fuck was that sound? They didn't have to say anything. I could just hear it and see it in their eyes. Like, what the fuck was that? I'm going to guess there was a child. No, there was a, we got, we got plastic cups because if I buy glass, anything, it'll break. Yeah.
Speaker: And when you go up the stairs, there's the landing is, you know, the stairs go up and you can, the kids will set stuff there when they go up to talk to their mother about something. And then he comes down, he knocks the glass down, it falls down every fucking stair. And he looks at it like, it's concrete house. And he just watches it like, look at that fucking.
Speaker: Holy shit, that must be what gravity is. Let's be honest. Let's open it was a kid because he's your stereotypical Mexican. Yes. 47 kids living in another one looked just like him. I don't care. You can't tell one from Pedro. That's why he's got 47 kids and all their names are wanting Pedro. That's the only two names they use.
Speaker: And all their kids' names will be one and bigger. And they have a Volkswagen. Next one, I'm naming cheats just to be different. And they have a Volkswagen Bug, and all 55 of them all fit into those Volkswagen Bugs at the same time. Ask Mom. I won't buy one of those Volkswagen Buses. I hate them fucking things. I didn't say Buss. I said Bug. Oh, well. I love a Bug. I love a Bug. It's been a long time.
Speaker: That's like it's, it's weird now knowing that teaching Chong are going to do another movie now. It's a good, really. Yeah. Slug bug. You get to punch somebody in the arm and yell slug bug. Me and Mark,
Speaker: me and mark were talking about cheech and chong doing one last movie and it's like is there comedy gonna be funny like it was back in the day i'm so over cheech and chong and now they have like these new what is it weed water or weed gummies or something
Speaker: these two ass clowns. You weren't funny in the 70s like you were funny for one movie. Yeah, you beat the shit out of that dead horse. Let's be honest. And you're not funny now like stop it. Give it a we get it your stoners in your Mexican. Are you guys even really Mexicans? Are you Mexican Americans? I don't think I don't think Tommy Tommy Tommy Tong is as white as it gets. Yeah. His name is Chong. He doesn't sound very white.
Speaker: Well, he's Asian. Sounds like the guy who's going to answer the phone at the Chinese restaurant when you order some fucking beef and broccoli. I don't know that. That sounds good. Yeah, he does. He's got a good looking daughter, though. Does he? You guys probably have the mother's looks, too. Lay down, Chong. Oh, have you not seen this girl? I'm waiting for the punch line. I mean, you jagged. Lay down, Chong.
Speaker: Yeah, it is. I feel like there's a joke in here. I mean, her name is her name is fantastic, but she's like she came from Tommy Chong. When you see her, you're going to be like, get the fuck out of here. That's his kid. Isn't she an actress at that? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, look up Rob Schneider's fucking daughter.
Speaker: Yeah. You know, I've seen what his daughter looks like. We've seen, we've seen her in concert. She was with Jelly Roll and not a fan of her music. And then you're going to stop your whole ass concert when you have your fucking nieces. I don't know how old was she eight year old niece that should be in bed and you're so goddamn high. You don't even know where you are at this point. You're trying to rip her teeth out of her head because it's loose. Wow. Wow.
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. Elle King was was with Jelly Roll. It was Elle King. Uh, struggle, struggle, Jennings and Jelly. I'm not a big fan of struggle, struggles, a long line of Jennings because Waylon was fucking everything with a hole back in the day. And there's so many goddamn Jennings out there and they're trying to milk that name. What's wrong with you, Brian? The chick is 63 years old. Who? Ray Don Chong. Is that his wife? That's his daughter.
Speaker: Is it really? She's 63, dude. How is it fucking commando? He's got to be like 80 something. Yeah, in the 80s, she was a good looking broad. Listen, I'm getting there. We're getting there. So for me, I mean, I'm good. We're good. I mean, you know, for fuck's sake, because we can't all have a 21 year old. I'm sorry. You guys remember when we were younger?
Speaker: No. I can't remember yesterday. Steven, Steven, you've seen the principal. Yeah. She's the teacher. Guilford. Really? The principal, that's the one that had... He's got the Honda Shadow. Yeah. He's got the Honda Shadow. Yeah. And the teacher was almost raped by the guy they call White Sack. Oh, that's right. Yeah. She was the teacher.
Speaker: Oh, that was the principle. It's called the principle. It's got, um, Jim, uh, she that was the wish version of, uh, stand, stand by me. Yeah. And then they had an even worse, uh, wish version than that. So speaking of getting older. Yeah. You remember back in the day.
Speaker: And don't be these guys because it is what it is. We're all guilty of it. We're all men. Back in the day when we would look up porn, like internet and stuff like that. And we were like in our own days, put a picture of the loan. And we would look up like mature or milfs and whatnot. And we're like in our twenties in the mature and the milfs were like in their twenties.
Speaker: now maybe, maybe like early thirties. Now that we're in our forties, if we type in mature, they're like in their sixties and seventies and you know, like a 25 year old MILF just really doesn't. You're just like, dude, I can see that just walking down the street. No, that's fine. Sign of us getting super old. Like, well, mature, I guess I'm,
Speaker: Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great.
Speaker: Here's a question. Who's a bigger alcoholic? Brian or Glick? Brian. I don't go to meetings, though. Not me. I've never been to a meeting. Medicine time, baby. I don't drink. Not a lot of nonsensical nonsense. We have Dusty Spunk and a granny banger on the panel. And he just rage quit.
Speaker: Who's a wish for the Matthew Ryan?
Speaker: Keep Matthew Willard's name out your fucking mouth. Because he fucking said the line from screen. It needs to go fry some chicken. I'll be right by. As we learned the other day, apparently Brian lives in a mansion and I live in a shanty because he has to go down the hall
Speaker: I've been to his house. He must be hiding everything. He probably brought you to the house they shares with us. He walks around the dining room table twelve times just so it makes it look like he goes longer. Please. I guess
Speaker: You know what? I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't I
Speaker: Well, who does the other Brian belong to? Have you guys seen the show guns yet on FX? I don't even know what it's about. The poster looks boring. Really, Jarvis? I just died ass. Good fucking God. Yeah. What's this? What's this lever do? Oh, shit. Oh, there you go. That's Mark's brain.
Speaker: Yeah. Actually, Brian wasn't making fun of me. He was actually like, God, it must be so nice for him to be able to be like, I'll be right back and go two steps into his bathroom. Meanwhile, I got to go down the hallway, up some stairs, around the corner. Walk around the dining room table nine times. I wasn't making that one. Three quarters of the way around the block, just to get to my first bathroom. uphill, both ways. I just went to the fridge.
Speaker: Okay. The fridge is a lot harder than my bathroom is. So. Hey, you need to buy a fridge for your room too then. No, I'm not doing that. No, he doesn't. I want to put one of my operators in the garage. So no. Oh, rich guy over here. I have multiple fridge rooms.
Speaker: I'm better than you. How many Frigidaires do you have? Pardon me. Do you have any gray people? I have three. Excuse me while I go to Frigidaire number five. That's where I keep my beverages. Oh, no, no. Listen, you got to remember there's a food truck at this house. So there you can't store that stuff in the food truck. You got to store it somewhere.
Speaker: Yeah, it's not like he has to go to the refrigerator. He just goes to his wife's food truck and grabs all the free beer. Oh, she sells her beer in the food truck? That's illegal, sir. Really? Yes, that's illegal. You can't sell alcohol from a moving vehicle. You can in the state of California. You've got to have a license for it. But actually, yes, you can, because there are
Speaker: And this was a business plan that a buddy of mine wanted, and I wanted to do years ago. We're like, Oh, we can't be like, we can never get a license for that. However, much like the ice cream truck that drives around the neighborhood in the summer, there's a beer truck who drives around the neighborhood playing whatever music they want to play. And they are literally selling beer from their truck. So, so like they're one of their commercials. Do they sell pegs and shit too?
Speaker: I can't remember where it's at but they they did like this uh uh youtube video and this has been a couple years back. It's them driving through the neighborhood and music playing and all the dads are like like kicking the doors down. Oh yeah.
Speaker: and then in the in the hall at the end of the video, you see Glick and his in his man. He's running after the truck. Wait. It's like it's like the Eddie Murphy joke instead of the ice cream man. It's the beer man beer man. You're on welfare for most of the beer truck in the neighborhood and they they would know me. I would never have to run after. They would just pull up in front of my house and they'd be like, we're going to make our month's rent right now.
Speaker: Could see like fucking owned a beer truck. He'd have like a fucking t -shirt cannon to shoot the beer You do realize a terrible beer truck he would be the worst beer truck owner ever Is just drinking the beer like you realize like a bad drug dealer is one who smokes up their own product
Speaker: You think I'm selling beer and all of a sudden we've all seen that shitty movie Scarface. Rule number one, don't get hired on supply. This motherfucker breaks that rule day one. Brian and I have our own beer truck and it's just us sitting in the parking lot getting hammered off our own supply. Like you said that my full ox posh voice weirdly suits you. That I should speak like that an entire episode.
Speaker: It cracks Nicky up every time. I think it's one of the, you know, I do a lot of dumb things. I can write a series. I can be the next J .K. Rollins or the next, that bitch that wrote Twilight. George RR Martin.
Speaker: or that other, that chick that wrote that weird like Fifty Shades of Glick book. Like I can create a book of all the dumb things I do. Glickisms. And like that's the one thing every time I do it, no matter if it's just for one word, it makes Nikki giggle like a schoolgirl. Have you heard the story about the Twilight and Fifty Shades of Grey, how they're connected?
Speaker: No, it's a fan fiction novel. Is it fan fiction? No, no, no, no, no, no. No, it's basically. No, I'm not. I'm not joking. It's a fan fiction. That's how it started. It started off. No, but it started. No, what happened from my understanding and this is what I saw is that the the writers for for one of those two
Speaker: Oh, someone's taking the SATs, boys. Was listening to a band and it gave her one of the songs of the band gave her an idea. She wrote Twilight. The person watched some person watched Twilight and went, I got an idea for a movie and wrote Fifty Shades of Grey. Yeah, it was a fan fiction. It started off as a fan fiction novel. And then they went with it. And the only reason why and the only reason why I know that I mean, I've watched both of them.
Speaker: but the only reason why I know that is because my wife told me because she knows a lot about that. I gotta find that story because it was like fascinating and all I know is whatever the name of the band is we all need to blame them. What you can't see? What the fuck? I can't see anything bud. I can't read the comments. I rage -witted.
Speaker: shut the fuck that sounds like a lot of work just to drink beer i'm sorry a lot of a lot of a lot of the a lot of the women who that i know like whatever that read that 50 shit basically said it that when you when you read the book it sound it was written like a sixth grader with down syndrome because there was a lot of like the grammar was really bad
Speaker: There was a lot of alms and like, like just terrible. Like they said, it was just fucking terribly written. I don't know. I mean, it was a huge, huge. Well, the way they wrote Bram Stroker's Dracula, my wife is the one that told me I didn't read the books. I watched the movies instead. I saw the movies. My ex -wife, I wouldn't even read the cover.
Speaker: well haven't seen either and don't care to see either um you said you can't read the cover i wouldn't read the cover because i i mean those books let's be honest 50 Shades of Grey the book is female porn yeah yeah big one
Speaker: It's it's literally it's literally like the the books with Fabio on the cover. No, there there was an artist that literally had the last names. I think it's not Stroker. I think it's like Stroker or something. Just catching up with the comments. They wrote Dracula, the original Dracula book. Bram Stroker. And Rikes. Yeah. All right, guys, I'm going to get off here.
Speaker: I don't know. Uh my leg is starting to bother me. It's been bothering me for since last night and he's going to go and cut it off and then I was going to say stoker stoker. Thank you. II said it's **** wrong. Mark, I can take care of that leg for you. I have a machete. Hey, I got one. I got one. Hey, I told Brian, I told Brian earlier, I'm going to cut it off and hopefully it grows back but he says I'm not an alien or you know, a lizard. So, it won't
Speaker: I mean like you're not going to come out of Florida and I'm going to bring my machete and I'm going to do a little choppy choppy. I'm just going to kick your door and then go choppy choppy. I'm going to hopefully try to get some sleep tonight. And the great thing about it is I have many years in the construction business. I can create you a wooden leg.
Speaker: I don't want a wooden leg. I want a metal one. And then I'm going to stab your eye out so you have to wear a patch and then you could be our pirate. You could be our very own personal pirate. You're going to get me a parrot too? If I have to. What do you mean?
Speaker: I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you, Glick. I will teach it to say fuck you
Speaker: Glick's going to be like standing over me, acknowledge me Jarvis, acknowledge my championshipness. It's coming. It's coming this weekend. It's happening. I think the tag team will win, but I think Cody Rhodes wins it against. I ain't going to be on the fucking show because they don't fucking put me on the show. Why would I want to watch that?
Speaker: Dude, dude, we can come back and we can scoop these guys. There we go. There will be a follow -up show after mania. To see if my picks were as good as they were last year. Mark, I know you want to go. Appreciate you hanging out, man. All right. Have a good one, Mark. What's up, buddy? Hey, how far is it?
Speaker: How far is your download? Oh, I haven't even checked it. Probably only 50%. Probably about 50%. Yep, tomorrow. I'll be on tomorrow. Later. Go pick that hamster in the ass, man. What the fuck? It's not a hamster. It's the old lady. It's his mother -in -law. I guess. I've already got to play the new update and the new maps. And emergency sucks, bro. Are they ever going to quit? Not a fan of emergency.
Speaker: No. It looked pretty cool. Are they going to put Nuketown on that game? No, because Nuketown is not Modern Warfare. It's Call of Duty. Wait. Call of Duty. Strike that reversal. We need Black Ops, right? Oh, OK. I know Black Ops. I think that's going to be the next game they're already talking about. I seriously won't touch a video game until Grand Theft Auto 6 comes out.
Speaker: Smart. Why? Why? It's going to be the same shit where you beat somebody up and. Oh, yeah, like Call of Duty isn't the same. It was Call of Duty, Brian. Jesus Christ. No, because then I can tell you to fucking the guys over to your left and then you'll get mad at me. So no, it's not the same. Yeah, well, then I don't have to come down to Florida, Brian. You're you're the first one on the fucking list. What list is that? The fuck?
Speaker: I'm not gonna have to fire him, he's just gonna quit.
Speaker: And it's the same version. It's like, it's like, uh, it's like the same people that literally used to be on the show and they're, they were so dismayed that I've been on the show. Like those people, like when you say there's people or those people are the same thing as somebody else saying a day.
Speaker: He does the work for us.
Speaker: Why are those people? What are you, some sort of racist? What are we doing here? We wearing hoods? Well, I tender my resignation. Good night, boys. I don't accept your resignation. You don't have to accept it. You don't pay me anyway. I do, I don't accept it.
Speaker: You can't leave him and Mark always talk about me behind the scenes, you know where they're like, oh, we're so proud of Jarvis Yeah bullshit. They're like we're surprised Steven hasn't jumped out a fucking window yet. Actually. I've never said that behind the scenes
Speaker: I was going to say, no one has ever said, we're proud of you. I say that on the show behind the scenes. I'm like, dude, when Jarvis finally offs himself, I know it's on camera because that's going to make for radio. That's going to be a gold star episode of Jarvis is like laughing and joking and like, hey, guys, don't worry. I'm taking you with me, motherfucker. No, I won't be there for that show. I'm sorry.
Speaker: You'll be part of my 13 reasons why. You know what she said. There's literally probably like bets being made in Vegas of how long I'm going to stay on the fucking show. We're not that popular bro. We don't know that.
Speaker: We don't know that. We literally have three people watching us right now. The replies, the replays. And we know all three of them personally. And one of them is your wife, Travis, and the other one is me making sure we're not getting canceled on YouTube. And then like you saw, I mean, there's your three viewers.
Speaker: As like you said, two of them are still doing better. Yeah. Well, me and Mark do the show and I look up and I see that there's two people. I'm like, there you go. Mom and dad are watching. So at the end of the day, if I've got three people, that's three more people than other. Well, and like, and what we've always said, the numbers at the top of the screen doesn't really matter. It's not going to change the show. It's, it's.
Speaker: The only reason we do the show live is so people can actually comment. You want to turn it down? What the fuck? After all, I forget that we're doing a fucking show because I'm like, I do, too. Right. You know, I didn't talk about things tonight, but yeah. Yeah. It's so easy to just talk about nervous and shit on him. I want to talk about the whole Ashton Kutcher thing. What about what's going on with Ashton Kutcher? About the P Diddy boy or whatever.
Speaker: Yeah. Once again, look over here. Cause I'm doing something over here, but yeah, go ahead. You know how everybody's been praised and Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis for, for years about them doing all this good work with, you know, sex trafficking and blah, blah, blah. Well, people are starting to notice a trend and Ashton Kutcher's world. Danny Masterson basically locked up for the rest of his life.
Speaker: for horrendous, some, and not even allegations at this point. I mean, like it was, it was perfect facts. The only thing I didn't get about the Danny Masterson thing is they had tried them once before and they acquitted them. It was because the judge was a part of the Illuminati. I was going to say you suck enough cops. Now the whole Diddy situation that's
Speaker: Everyone knew Diddy was going to be a part of something. Everything that's coming out with Diddy, past interviews, him and Ashton Kutcher are very good friends and there's past interviews and things that he's said in interviews that are coming back to bite him in the ass. One of the things, one of the quotes
Speaker: This isn't exact, but it was, it was, it was in an interview and they asked me a lot. He said, there's some parts of our friendships that I, our friendship that I can't discuss and or talk about. He's doing any of it. All that. Yeah. But.
Speaker: If you know about it, you're just as guilty as the person who's doing it. Agreed. And it's like, if I watch Chris flap a dog, I'm not going to say anything. But I'm going to be like, dude, that's fucked up. Yeah, like Jarvis, I'm sorry. I'm actually waiting for the Oprah one to come out. I'm waiting for, I'm actually waiting for all the facts to come out. 50 Cent called out P Diddy a long time ago and you guys know this, right?
Speaker: Yeah, he did. You know, where where 50 was like, yeah, he did. He came up to me and was like, let me take you shopping. I'll buy. Yeah. And we all know that's OK. I got money. We all know 50 Cent ain't shy about calling motherfuckers out because that motherfucker was that motherfucker was ruthless on Floyd Mayweather. Well, then get 50 Cent get like shot in real life. He got shot. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, we were talking about that the other night. We were talking about that the other day, weren't we? About how he said to Floyd Mayweather, if you can read a third grade children's book, I'll give you $10 million. Yeah. Without stuttering, right? That's what he said. If you could read a third graders book without stuttering, I'll give you $10 million.
Speaker: you know, like like Brian just said, hey, it was like, hey, you want to go shopping? I said, hell no, because I knew what that meant. Yeah. You know, but now there's you're going to go shopping with another dude and the dude is going to buy stuff for you. The ****. Yeah. I mean, that's probably me. I mean, you're going to go shopping with him.
Speaker: I mean, hey, if I can get a sugar daddy, I'll take a sugar daddy shit. We got a free shit. Wow. They said, Nope, can't talk about Diddy anymore. The government got you, Brian. Damn. Whatever. Something to do with Tupac's murder. Oh yeah, probably.
Speaker: Well, that's that wouldn't surprise me. That's that's been a whole conspiracy. Pac and Pac and Biggie, they've they've they've said for years that that he was involved in both of their murders. Yeah, I mean, maybe they knew and Diddy was like, hey, you know, even though Biggie's supposed to know, but not only that, well, the thing is, from my understanding about the mind. Yeah.
Speaker: Hey, there's some dudes that are watching this that like feet and then all of a sudden they're like, Oh, hey, this is a family show. What's wrong with you? Quentin Tarantino's watching this and going like, I need to get those feet in my next film. Okay. I think, I think, I think Rex Ryan just turned the camera around. No, but, but actually I want to,
Speaker: of the
Speaker: no but like everybody that's been convicted like no not Epstein what's the Harvey Weinstein and Bill Cosby she's there's literally pictures of her hug and he's the greatest and I'm like bitch
Speaker: Back in the day, we didn't know what Bill Cosby was doing behind closed doors, like the old saying goes. The darkness eventually comes out into the light. Oh, Oprah could be like, well, I didn't know what was going on. And everyone pardons her for it. The whole Oprah thing, all Oprah did. And this is why she's so successful. It's not because her show is good or anything like that. Or she's sold out.
Speaker: All she did was all she did was hobnob and kiss the ass of the most powerful people on the planet And that's why she got so successful at the end of the day. She's exactly But well, that's what i'm saying That's what i'm saying You don't you don't hobnob and and kiss ass like that and get as big as she did without doing something nefarious
Speaker: What would you do I'm not saying I'm not saying I wouldn't have done the same thing but it if
Speaker: that she had
Speaker: But what I'm saying is, is if you get caught, yeah, you first thing you're going to say is like, yeah, I didn't know. Yeah, bitch, calm the fuck down. Of course, you fuck. Yeah, but it's it's it's one of those things. And then, of course, the NBA. And we say this on the show all the time. You got your GBA. You got a degree. Yeah. Yeah. You're guilty by association. Not only that, you know, if if if you know, if I if I watch
Speaker: And I know I really watch Brian commit a crime and I don't say or do anything about it. I'm just as guilty as his at the end of the day. A hundred percent. You know, Brian and I go into a fucking city mart and down there and, and, and, and homeless at the Florida and he was like, watch this magic trick. And he pulls out a fucking three 57 and robs the joint and, and, and shoots the clerk because he's fucking bored. And I'm standing beside him going,
Speaker: Full story, bro. When he gets locked up, guess who's getting locked up? Right next to him, exactly. And you can't sit there and bitch saying, oh, I didn't know. Well, yeah, but you could have fucking slid something. And I get it. It's a slippery slope. Do we think Ashton Kutcher did any of those things too?
Speaker: I don't know
Speaker: That wasn't like he thought out to hang out with the Danny Masterson. They were on the same show. They were good friends. They were good friends. He's the godfather, I think, to Amelia and his kids. Ashton and Mila both wrote letters and Danny was in court to speak on his character and said that he was a good person and everything like that. And that's the other thing that came out with this whole Diddy thing is that
Speaker: back in the day during like when during the 70s show Danny used to, or I think it was Danny that they said who had these parties that were questioned and he called them something. I can't remember what they were called. And Ashton was there. Again, you can't be knowledgeable
Speaker: And I'm just going to speak and feel free at the same time. I'm just going to say this in my personal opinion and how I feel about it. You can't be knowledgeable and you can't witness stuff or know about stuff and then go, Oh, I didn't do it. Yeah. You didn't do anything to correct it. Like, like, like you can't, you can't say that.
Speaker: I, you know, I was there and I knew about it. And, you know, like, in my opinion, you're just as guilty as the person doing, whether you do. Exactly. I mean, there's a, it's a thin line though. I mean, it's like, you see me steal a candy bar. Yeah. Okay. That you can let go. Well, you see me do something seriously nefarious. That's a different thing. Grape a panda. Like, bro, they're endangered animals. Why are you scraping a panda?
Speaker: the the
Speaker: Brian had like the fucking nun just chilling behind him on a purple wall. It was like just some random person just chilling. Who do you know that's his actual name? The fucking John Cena back there. Hey, we've seen you by the way. It's John Cena's next character. That was definitely Stacy. Stay in the background.
Speaker: no i think no that's no she was standing there stacy was standing there like it looked like she was getting ready to go through a door oh my gosh there she is that would be the best horror movie what do you mean guys what no one's here with me all of a sudden just acts to the back of their head yeah i'm all alone you guys are freaking me out bro
Speaker: Yeah. Don't move, Brian, because he's coming behind you. He stays there with us. I'm going to see how this plays out. But no, I don't want this shit. Don't move, Brian. I want to see how this plays out. I think once they nab Diddy, I would not be surprised if he magically ends up in his cell bed. In all seriousness, it would be easier to name people that you think are completely innocent. Exactly. Yanna Reeves, Ice Cube, maybe Gabriel Iglesias,
Speaker: But again, we would have said the same thing a week ago about Ashton Kutcher. No, I've always thought I've never liked that dude. I never really cared. Well, when he was on the ranch, he was pretty much playing who he is in real life. Yeah, but you know what? I always found him on the ranch. I did. I liked it.
Speaker: He was like Kelso moving away again. Well, here's the thing about the ranch. I can't see him and go, yeah, ranch hand. Yeah. Even though he grew up on a ranch, he just... I think that was the point. Yeah. Because he was supposed to be the football player of the family. Well, I understand that. But my point is, like, Asin Kucher and a ranch, those two things just don't go together for me at all. Yeah, that's not your spot. That's like...
Speaker: We're talking about Bill and the people. I know. I'm just saying. He was playing a goddamn role. He was a character. Yeah, I'm just saying. Terrible casting. We're talking about the connections and the ties that he has with people. I know, but he was talking about something else. These are people that he's very close to. I mean, even going back. It's been long stated in Hollywood. You can't get ahead unless you give head.
Speaker: Well, look at what can't William. Oh, can't William says everything, dude. Cat Williams. Like he went after. Yeah. But dude, they are burying him because cat Williams has had problems. Like, I mean, there was that video where he got his ass whooped by like some 13 year old boy.
Speaker: Yeah, they are there. The cat Williams has had it and they are destroying. They are absolutely destroying cat Williams and he's out here. And that's what we talked about a couple of weeks ago on men can for men. We talked about the whole Drake Bell situation. Yeah. And then look what they did to Corey hair. No. Yeah. And Feldman Feldman.
Speaker: I mean, yeah, he's been calling it out for years. And even I thought he was crazy. He was like, that dude's lost his fucking mind. They made Feldman look like a complete fucking psychopath lunatic. And now look at him today. His brain is so fucked up. And this cat has been since the eighties. Yeah. So one day we're all going to say we believe you. Yeah. You know, you know, and you know, he talked about what happened to him and look at
Speaker: You know, the whole Michael Jackson situation. And then you got Macaulay Culkin coming out and he's born. I used to spend the night and never ran ranch all the time. But also look how fucked up Macaulay Culkin was for years. Yeah. You know, like he still is fucked up, though. He's starting to get his life together. Wholeboy's married to a Disney chick. Bring us all. Yep.
Speaker: you know like and they had a kid together now they've had a couple really she's gorgeous i'm like but like even look at even look at amanda binds that poor girl's been to hell with that look at look at edward furlong and who he's married to you guys seen freddie versus jason right yeah yeah he's married to the uh
Speaker: I can't remember her name in the movie, but he's married to the chick that Freddie goes after. Wait, it's not a, yeah, it's not a, it's like, who they're married to, but you look at these cats, you look at Edward Furlow, you know, he, he went through, he went through a, look at, look at what happened to Shia LaBeau. Yeah. I mean, that cat, that cat was literally with that Transformers franchise for a few years.
Speaker: end all be all man. Like holy shit. Disney. He's a goddamn action star. And he's killing an ass taking names. Yeah. Now all of a sudden like
Speaker: He's he's blackballed. He's he's you know, he he you know, they make him like he's he's made out to look like a fucking lunatic, you know, he's doing rap battles in Central Park. He's he's in rehab. Well, I mean, one of the greatest examples is Dave Chappelle when they they they fucked him up big and they said by the time you get home, everybody will think you're a crackhead. And for years, I thought he was a crackhead. Turns out they just fucking
Speaker: Did fucking do drugs Were you there? Has even said he did drugs doing drugs Crackhead is a different story So he could get away from Comedy Central because after a while he hated it there. I
Speaker: Well, he hated it there. They were trying to make him suck cock over there. Yeah. Who cares? Jeff would hit right in. Damn, Nicky. Don't you have a sandwich to make? She said she's making you a very special sandwich, Jeff. I bet she is. It's rat poison and arsenic on a brioche. On a brioche.
Speaker: But no once Dave Chappelle came back like funny as shit is his Netflix specials Well, not not only that like when Chappelle came back They tried to cancel him. Yeah, because you know, they said he went after transgenders and after everyone
Speaker: No, but but he didn't go after anybody or no story. That was a true story. No, no, they tried to cancel him because they tried to they tried to shit on Chappelle. They shout out to an Ohio boy. What's going on, Dave? Yeah.
Speaker: Uh, you know, they tried to shit on him and tried to cancel him because they said that he was going after transgender or that, or the, the, the gay and lesbian community. And then the guy came out and did a whole ass brand new special. And he was like, let me be, let me, let me be real for a second. Let me, let me holler at you guys. Let me tell you the story. And, and, and, and where that situation came from, there was no hate there.
Speaker: another comedian and there was no fucking heat they were actually because because like he was yeah he was because he was telling the story of what like legitimately happened yeah yeah you know what i mean and it was like a verbatim story yeah and him and this person were cool like you know what i mean like
Speaker: Why are you trying so hard to shit on fucking people who just wanted, and that's, you know, Shane Baranthal, who, or not Shane Baranthal, what's his name? John. John Baranthal, sorry. Yeah. Like Shane in The Walking Dead. He does, he does a great podcast. He does a great podcast. Does he? Yes. And he's had Shy on there a lot. You know, he's got other guys. Yeah, Marcus Latrell on there too. And it's like,
Speaker: the shy, the shy one that he did. Oh my God, dude. Dude, that was intense. There was a lot to handle because, you know, I broke it down and he was like, you know, we got made out to look like certain type of individual. Yeah. You know, like I was doing this shit, but it's so crazy what's going on in Hollywood. And it's like, you know,
Speaker: The, the upside of all the bad things is, is we have, you know, with all the bad people that are out there, you have guys that, um, like the, the older brother and I Carly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This cat, this cat was like, there's videos, like raw, like raw videos of him pushing in between like Schneider and just basically mush and Dan Schneider in the face.
Speaker: So that he came in between, you know, him and the girl who played Carly or the girl that played Sam or whatever, or videos of him going, it's late. We got to get home. Even, uh, I think her name's what's her name. Um, the girl who played Sam and I Carly, Jenna McCarty. Yeah. She, she, she wrote a book and in her mother.
Speaker: she, she, she praised this cat and, and, and it was just like, unfortunately, there's not many people out there. Like this dude was really, in all honesty, he was risking everything. Yeah. Being that wall by being that barrier to protect these kids on a show and still remain. Well, even Jenna McCurdy, she was, she was made out to be crazy for a while.
Speaker: Well, yeah, because she called her mom a lot of fucking stuff. Well, no, but you remember when her dad, she sent she sent pictures to her boyfriend that leak. Yeah. And everybody's like, oh, she's lost her fucking mind. I'm like, no, she's in her 20s and she sent her boyfriend pictures and somebody hacked the phone.
Speaker: But, but they literally gave like, it almost destroyed her career and nobody jumped in to try to stop it because she was talking bad about all these people. That's, that's the thing that they do though. Yeah. Have you seen Britney lately on her Instagram? Oh, Britney lost her goddamn mind. She keeps losing her mind. That's the first time. But, but, but put yourself in Britney's shoes.
Speaker: Like, A, she was surrounded by yes, for God knows long. And B, God knows what happened to her. There's a rumor he's he's trying to be funny, but it's failing miserably. Yeah, but I mean, but yeah, but but even even there's a rumor that Dan Snyder got Brittany's younger sister pregnant and chick had the baby.
Speaker: Yeah. Well, yeah, you look at pictures of that looks like a man and he got Amanda, but he raped Amanda Bynes and then the next week on the show, after she comes back, he hands her a baby and says, see, you could have had that. Yeah. Yeah. It was fucked up, dude. That's how I mean, imagine.
Speaker: And I'm going through that and you can't say shit. Are you going to lose your career? Your only source of income? No, because here's the thing. Parents could have said shit to. Yeah, but at the end of the day, they're like, fuck that. Bring that gravy train, motherfucker. Yeah, because we don't have to work. You do this one movie. We don't have to work for another 10 years when we're leaving here. I think of the things that Brian would do for 200 panels.
Speaker: Exactly. $200! He's already told us when he'd do the Elon Musk. Yeah. I can do it for the pennies. I gotta do it for the dollars. Well, no, but I mean, seriously. I mean, penny pennies, y 'all. Yeah, you got that. You got millions of dollars going to these kids, and their parents are like, just do the thing.
Speaker: but I can make it hell, baby. Well, look at what Rose McGowan has said about a lot of those fucking Weinstein, all those producers out there. She's like, and they made her own villain.
Speaker: Yeah, because he was one of the Jews, though. That's why. Yeah, because everything. Oh, OK, because he's the only one that's made fun of. Yeah. Calm down there, Mel Gibson. Yeah. The point is.
Speaker: I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker: Well, there you go. No one can say that Hollywood isn't a shady fucking town. No, but the point is, if you do anything they don't like, you're fucked. Well, look at Ria Remy.
Speaker: I mean, as Chris was playing the dude from iCarly, he was taking his career at risk every time he stepped in front of one of those kids. But he did it in the smartest way because if you see those clips, he's playing. He's like, I love you there. He did it in the best way he could without jeopardizing his career because if he lost his career, then those kids got no barrier.
Speaker: Well, they even had some guy and one of these clips who was in like a superhero costume doing one of the Nickelodeon shows and says, Hey, zip up your fly. There's kids around here. God, you know, it's late at night. Come on, zip your fly up and shit. And it's just like, you watch that shit when you're a kid and you're just like, Oh, this is funny. Now you see it. And you know the context behind it. It's like, damn. I mean, I mean,
Speaker: That's been going on for years. You look you you you watch like Disney movies or Pixar movies and stuff like that Lion King. It says sex in the clouds. It actually says fxx fxx fxx fxx, which is the studio that does special effects for Disney movies, but The sex thing's been disproven. There's there's always grown -up jokes and
Speaker: into windows and then the kids are on the road to El Dorado at one point dude walks in the room and chick rises her head up from dude's lap well i mean allegedly she's checking his shoes well in in shrek you know there's you know they showed a scene where it had the three bears and mama and papa bear were in the cage and the baby bear was in a separate cage
Speaker: like, you know, those jokes and into windows are always there in kids movies and kids television. But they're in movies, in movies like that. It's hidden in enough where the adults of the room are like, ha ha ha, I got that. My kids didn't, but I got that. And even that it's yes, it's creepy.
Speaker: and then later on they show Papa Bear and Baby Bear like at Shrek's swamp or whatever
Speaker: But it's not as bad as the shit going on in the background. Oh, definitely. I mean, to find out all this shit that was going on at Nickelodeon, and it's it's slowly coming out at Disney, but I think Disney has enough deep pockets to where they can be like, they can hide this go away. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, the funny thing is the Disney logo or the Nickelodeon logo is the is a splat of orange. It's the exact same shape as Jeffrey Humpsang's island. Right. I heard that. Yeah. It's even got like like on Epstein Island, there's a mini island just off the coast, like maybe a quarter mile away. That dot is actually on the thing, too. What the fuck did you just throw at me?
Speaker: I mean, it's nuts what's all coming out of all that shit right now. But, once again, it's all a distraction. Well, Daniel, I hope Daniel does go to jail, but that motherfucker ain't gonna see a jail, so... Why not? Danny Masterson did. He won't, because he already knows what's gonna happen to him.
Speaker: He'll be the one they find in the bedroom after he swallowed a million pills. Just like Diddy, Diddy will do the same or he'll be found in his cell bed because he knows too many people have done that shit. Well, and that's the, that's the other thing. Well, that's the other thing. That's the thing. They can't find him. Well, he supposedly left the country. He's my new neighbor, by the way.
Speaker: He went to a country where there's no extradition you damn know he did On his private plane and this drug meal looked at like fucking that dude that dude's face
Speaker: tell me that that that drug meal doesn't look like he's about to spill to his guts he's like i'll tell you where they all are i got dps coordinates motherfucker here you go if that motherfucker ever were to be found by the fbi you know damn well he's telling them i will tell you everything but you put me in fucking witness protection right now yeah but do you really trust witness protection truth
Speaker: the
Speaker: well and they had six gun wounds in their chest and head so yeah he accidentally shot himself six times and dropped the weight on himself did you guys ever hear about the one where the guy was on the beach and he had shot himself in the back of the head and somehow managed to shoot himself through the front of the head too his talent and he knew he knew hillary clinton yeah
Speaker: Yeah, it is. The problem is you got you got people like Soros backing these people up. They got more money and they know what to do with speaking of speaking of these rich folks. Did you hear on this? Did you hear? We talked about the Baltimore Bridge. Are we doing a day? Here we go. Here we go. How do you go from.
Speaker: No, no, no talk about I went into the rich people in people up Hey, did you hear that? Did you hear that a couple days after the Baltimore Bridge incident that a barge? Hit a bridge in Alabama. I saw that I saw the video
Speaker: and that bridge is fine, by the way. No, the insurance policy. I'm here to join Brian over here and we're going to do our best for all the impersonations. The insurance policy on that Baltimore bridge was collected. It ain't easy being collected. The person that collected it was the same person that had insurance on the 9 -11 towers.
Speaker: Jeff, that's not. Oh, it's it's not real, dude. Stop it. Stop it. It's trying to tell me the aliens were around in the Aztecian times and they were like this. They were in Miami. You didn't see the whole thing. They were in that mall. Yeah.
Speaker: They were in the mall in Miami for sure. There's one here. There's one there. Hey, you still respect us. You're a real alien. That is Sir Puswa. You'll respect Sir Puswa. Puswa, right? I'm saying all right. Puswa. Puswa. Puswa. Sorry. He's French. He's French. Sorry. Sorry, Sir Puswa. I acknowledge you. He's French alien.
Speaker: You know, in my life, there's some French person that just heard that and was like, well, Jerry V. She's canceled. God, I hope that's the one person in France that you had on your friend's page. I can't wait for the hashtags. Hashtag cancel Jerry V. She. I'm like, oh, yeah, cancel that son of a bitch. Finally. Don't worry. They'll be canceling you to their sass boy. Trust me, I'm on flapper.
Speaker: I would laugh if like every podcaster out there gets cancelled and the last one that they can't cancel is Glick. We're just gonna keep trying to push the balance, right? I mean, I think that's what we need to do. We've been doing that ever since before we've been on this show, Brian. What the fuck are you saying? Every time somebody says, this is the line, don't cross it, Jeff and I go, hold our beer. It comes to cancelization.
Speaker: It comes down to one thing, and Chris Rock said it. Sorry, Kid Rock said it best. You can't cancel somebody that doesn't give a fuck. Truth. Truth. I mean, you can try all you want, but if I don't give a fuck, your opinion is literally just error. I'm not sure of any names, but I had a co -host on this show. I have a co -host on this show. I'm not mentioning any names, but if I were to mention their name, I would say that it rhymes with Smith. And he dropped a hard end.
Speaker: with the hard E. Yeah. I didn't get canceled. I know someone else who did that. The episode is still out there. I can buy this because I honestly don't remember. But in the same in the same episode, not only did I apologize, but I was forgiven
Speaker: Oh, did you did you get the one black guy that speaks for all that counts? Well, he he is a major influencer, Chris. Facts on facts. All right. He'll do a super collab and get me cleared.
Speaker: Super collab, major influencer, lots of followers. I'm untouchable. Jeff's going to be on there doing the super collab where he's like, I did not have sex. Oh, wait. Wrong one woman. Don't worry about that. And not sensible nonsense. Was it rock? Just call us. No, it wasn't rock. It was Tony D. Oh, this is fine. Keep up.
Speaker: I would love to pimp slap his stupid ass.
Speaker: I think I can take the rock. You wanna know why? I mean, all it is is steroids now. So I mean, I'm pretty sure you're probably good. At the end of the day, it's not a fake fight and it's not a movie. This is real life. This is real life. I've punched you in the mouth for real. I've put 300 pounds into a punch and rocked your shit. No pun intended when I said rock. I couldn't see. I don't have to have fancy catch phrases or anything like that to be a tough guy.
Speaker: Hey, Mr. Fruity Pebbles himself, John Cena once called him Duane, no Johnson. And The Rock did nothing. Brian, I think I can take The Rock. Brian, I think I can take The Rock. I think Brian could take The Rock. You know, there was a UFC fighter I used to hate, still fucking hate him to this fucking day. He got into the UFC because he laid on top of people.
Speaker: He was a big old fat dude. Butterbean? No, it wasn't Butterbean. It was, they called him big country. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was trying to think of his name. And I hated him to death, dude. And I said, I swear to God, if I ever see him out, I'm just going to walk up. Who was your favorite UFC fighter? Mine? Yeah. I mean, I'm back in the day with the Gracies.
Speaker: Oh, when Royce Gracie used to fight, dude, I loved watching Royce Gracie. When Ken Shamrock and those guys were younger, I used to like watching those guys fight. The new guys, I could care less, dude. I mean, I'm like... Just Santos, he wasn't too bad. When UFC first came out, and they didn't have, like, weight classes and stuff like that,
Speaker: I was just kidding. I would have to be in three times.
Speaker: If they had UFC back in, sorry to cut you off, but do you think if they had UFC back in like when Chuck Norris and Bruce Lee were all in their prime, do you think they would dominate UFC? They would have never done it because the paycheck from TV is much bigger in movies. I don't know. Bruce Lee would have... I'd rather knock it, my face pounded in, and I'd rather take a check to learn how to fucking act.
Speaker: Right. Was Bruce Lee and Chuck Norris the real deal? Absolutely. 100%. Oh yeah. They were the real deal. Well, some say Bruce Lee. Jean -Claude Van Damme, he's the real deal. You know, Stallone, back in the day when they were doing Rocky, or even today, I don't want to force Stallone because he was like a real deal. He wanted to get really punched.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: That dude is amazing. And he was there. They were showing him. They were talking to him about still more of a kung fu martial artist. What's what's up? Dude, that cat's a monster. He's insane. Even even even even if you want to go back and a guy who people are being jokes about him for years, Billy Blanks, Billy. Billy Blanks is a bad motherfucker. Oh, yeah. That is doing blanks now.
Speaker: He made a workout video, bud. But he'll whoop your ass. Yeah. Tybo. Oh, Tybo. Michael Tywhite was there being interviewed and they were asking him about... Van Dam versus... Seagal. Seagal. And he was like, you know what? Van Dam actually said to Seagal, let's spar.
Speaker: and they he talked about Michael J. White was talking about how him and Van Damme sparred when they are on a set of a movie. I don't remember the movie. It's probably Universal Soldier. Yeah, that's the one. And he's the one with Bill Goldberg. He says Van Damme would whoop in my ass. Van Damme was a was a real life martial arts. Right. Listen to the interview that Chuck Norris did about the Bruce Lee movie they were in. Bruce Lee really wanted to beat Chuck Norris's ass.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: Yeah. And he does the three punch thing. He does the first one and he's like, and then the third one, he goes real slow and he's like, God damn it. It's all about the deception. But the Seagal Van Damme thing was funny because Steven Seagal had been talking so much shit about every martial artist, even Dolph Lundgren.
Speaker: And John not only is that a badass, like in real life, he's a goddamn genius. Like Dolph Lundgren. Yeah, he's literally meant some motherfucker. He's like one of the smartest people on the planet. All right. I got it. I want to find a real martial artist, too. Brian Bosworth. You know what? I'm with you. All right. Brian's on the list. So Brian has a list now in the first
Speaker: The first, the first thing on Brian's list is Brian Bosworth. I have a list. Brian kangaroos, black bears, Canada, Texas, Texas, the, the, the Boston accent, Joe Rope. Actually, I don't want to fight Joe Rope and he would kick my ass. Yeah. That, you know what? I would pay to see that by the way, but yeah, Rogan's taking you down. When all is on my list, Jeff, Canada, Texas, black bears.
Speaker: Um, there was an alligator on there. Well, I don't want to fight an alligator, but people, I do want to, I want to boop an alligator on snoot. And then after I boop it on Nick, he gets an alligator purse. I get alligator boots and we have alligator for dinner. I could see Glick beating the shit out of an anaconda.
Speaker: I'll tell you, here's how you got to practice though before you can boot that on the nose. What's up, bro? What is up, man? Before you do that, what you have to do, listen to me, hear me out. Watch the movie Anaconda, it didn't work out for old, what's his name? Angelina Jolie's dad. You have to catch an iguana in the summertime, not in the winter, in the summer.
Speaker: When I was a kid, my mom had a six foot iguana and our next door neighbor, the woman that she got the iguana from, had two six foot iguanas and a 10 foot goddamn monitor in her house. Wait, one second. I got something. I got something for you boys. And she had a three foot. Well, put your left hand out.
Speaker: Mike, just go like this, right? Now I'm going to throw three jabs. Don't let me hit them. Don't let me hit your hand. Just move it out the way. So now notice the speed of the first two, right? Ready? That's one, two. OK, now here's the third one. Don't let me hit it. Ready? Come on, man.
Speaker: That was good. That was good. It's all about technique. I remember seeing that. I remember seeing that too. Well, so is Bruce Lee. So, so what I was saying about the iguanas, like iguanas. Yeah, go ahead. Sorry. You can catch them. You know, like I said, my mom had a six footer. Our neighbor had six couple of six footer, seven footers, whatever you want to call it. She had a 10 foot goddamn monitor, which was a fucking living, breathing dinosaur. And you know, she's had a big fucking komodo dragon, bro.
Speaker: A baby one, maybe Komodo Dragon is just as terrifying as a full grown Komodo. And the reason that - Well, no, you know what scares me about Komodo Dragon is what I learned on True Blood. Well, what scares you about Komodo Dragon is they will bite you, and it is a slow kill. They will bite you, and they will distract you as you slowly die.
Speaker: I've never seen a moto dragon in real life
Speaker: They have nothing better to do. They bite you. And then when they find you, they eat you whole. They just don't fuck around. Well bite you, track you for fun as you slowly and painfully die. And then eat you whole. Yeah. And laugh at you the entire time.
Speaker: There's a lot here. There's eyes of Ryan. Have you heard Glick say that he will be on a fan boat in the fucking Glades looking for alligators? And as soon as he sees one, he doesn't care if they stop the fan boat. He will jump in there and get on that fucking gate. I still have I still have an open ticket to go down to the Glades with a guy named Bill Booth and Python. So if you want to go poop an alligator, I'm out. Come on.
Speaker: as they can
Speaker: the the
Speaker: We used to own them as pets, man. They were fantastic. Me and Jeff will be in the fucking big -ass monster truck buggies that you see them driving. I will. I'll be still here in Gangungon. Look at these dumbasses. So basically, according to Jarvis, I'm going to go full on Macho Man, Randy Savage. We're on a fucking fan boat driving through the Everglades.
Speaker: And we're going to see an alligator. I'm going to go, oh, yeah. I'm rolling. I'm going to slide right off there and hit him with the elbow. I'm going to drop off the boat. The elbows. Hey, Jarvis, watch this. All right, boys, listen. It's been fun, and it's been real. I don't know if it was real fun or not, but I'm going to go. Oh, shut up. This is better than mostly what you do.
Speaker: I saw jaws ain't playing that fucking game Brandon Saturday night. We need you to come up Let's go Open door challenge That's what no we do gotta actually
Speaker: You need to invade his show. Go invade dad's worldwide. I don't think he I don't think he does. I don't think Brendan does the live show. I don't I don't think that's his show though. I think he does all his you know what you record pre recording. You know what the world of nonsensical nonsense were built different from other podcasts. It's hard. I'm not this this is a shot at Brendan.
Speaker: This is a shot at other people. We don't copy other people. We create. We create. We are on a whole nother level. Coming on Saturday, Brandon. Coming on Saturday, man. We dropped the link in the chat and just click on the link and jump in, man. You are absolutely 100 % invited in. I like him. I like it. He's cool. You know, I like people like Bryce, you know, like, you know,
Speaker: the the the the the the the the the the the the
Speaker: Our first episode dropped on April 10th. Wednesday. Oh, wow. Wednesday. Next Wednesday. Next Wednesday. I think we should do an anniversary show. Darn it, guys. I can't be on the show because I was a part of the first episode. Yeah. If I can get some time this weekend. Mickey said, yeah. I said, I have to show outside. Y 'all better hurry up and start pumping that smell into the crowd now. Oh, it's already been pumped. Don't you worry about it. You know what? Actually, actually.
Speaker: We're going to do a three -year anniversary show next Saturday. So let's start promoting that and pushing that out. There you go. We won't do it on the actual anniversary date. We'll do it on Saturday. Does that work? As they say on my kid's favorite show, the middle, we'll just push it. We'll mention it. We'll bring it up. But yeah, next Wednesday is our three -year anniversary. Wow. Of the podcast.
Speaker: I don't even know what Jeff and I's anniversary date is at this point. We're hiring close to 30. It's too old. We started this process. Brian, check your check your. It's almost. It's almost done. Oh, my God. It's like 1130. Wow. You got to plug that shit in.
Speaker: the the the the the
Speaker: or not, you know, each his own 2024. We're not. We're not here to judge. Let's put up with Jeff for a lot longer than three years. Jeff and I are coming up on 30, 26, 26, 27, seven years. We met. We met first day of junior year, 98, 98.
Speaker: and 98
Speaker: the the
Speaker: And I blended so well because I'm very short like me so He woke up from his chloroform nap and said well, I guess I'm a Cancunian. Yeah can't go Nancy What's like Garfield Garfield trying to know? Normal normal normal
Speaker: Jeff was my, Jeff was my normal. And I mailed him to Kenton instead of Abu Dhabi. Wow. I'm just a big fat cat eating lasagna. Eight Mondays. Actually, I love Mondays. I do too, actually. Is that weird? Yeah.
Speaker: like, well, I got a buddy of mine, Rick. Well, Rick, he's been on here. You guys know Rick. And every Monday, he's like, oh, it's fucking Monday. And I'm like, it's fucking men care for men. They're like, I'm like, I'm so. I guess Jeff. Yeah. Have you ever had a case of the Mondays? No, I believe you get your ass kicked or something like that. I'm serious because you need to see the fucking movie.
Speaker: I should do it. I'm worth it. Worth it. Hashtag worth it. Hashtag Jarvis is canceled. You're welcome. Hashtag you're welcome. Hashtag Jarvis gets fired. No, no, no. We're going to force you to rage quit. I'm normal. To the left, Jarvis. To the left. God damn it. Shut up, Brian. I think it is. Is it the trigger? Is that a trigger word for you? Left?
Speaker: That just means he's very woke. Wow, I feel offended. To your left. To your left. Yeah. I feel offended. I'm left -handed. Damn. Jesus Christ, yep, I'm done.
Speaker: the the the the
Speaker: the fifth
Speaker: No town has planned. Probably me. I was going to say it's Steven. Yeah, it's Steven. It's the other three guys in here that are not me. Oh, yeah, it's from Office Space. I'm sorry. Yes, that's right. It is an Office Space reference. Yeah, it's been recently. I'm going to buy it out of the movie once I get out. What movie are you quoting? Office Space. Oh. Hey, Brian, have you seen Office Space?
Speaker: Yeah, but it's been a while. Okay, tell me, tell me Glick is not a mix between the guy that loses his stapler all the time and the next -door neighbor, Dietrich Major's character. Oh, uh, uh, what's the fucking neighbor's name, Stan? No. I can't remember his name. Glick, just ask me where your stapler is.
Speaker: do you have my sabers? Have you seen my sabers? There's a reason why Glick has never worked in an office environment because if somebody stole my stapler, I would probably stand up. You're going all beefy boys on his butt. Lawrence! Lawrence! Lawrence! Yes, it's Lawrence. Oh, look, look, look, look. Oh, look what the cat dragged in. It's about time forever. Good lord, we're ending the show already, you
Speaker: Yeah, look, Connor with the hard ER finally comes in here. We're not going to call him Connor. You, Connor. You, Connor. We're calling Connor D from here on out. Yeah, it's Connor D. There's his screen and his phone all at the same time.
Speaker: Finally you show up, Connor. Since he's here, I'm leaving. You know, you know, you fucked up when my wife calls you out. I believe in too. That's all rage quit at once.
Speaker: the fifth
Speaker: Do you guys wonder why I don't show up the Monday show? Cuz if it's not enough. Oh trust dealing with Brian on Call of Duty is enough to make a lot of people go crazy. Dude, why is that me? Why does that have to be? You are technically retired. Take some responsibility. Fucking. You're going to the same goddamn dollar general university that fucking Jarvis went to. I didn't hold. I didn't hold your controller.
Speaker: Fuck you, Glick. You know what? Eat my fucking ass and suck my taint, you fucking piece of shit. Go, baby. Don't you fucking dare. Don't you fucking dare. Hey, hey. I heard Glick say the other day, if Stephen can tell me what the now name is for the fucking taint, I'd absolutely put my tongue on it. What? They call it a Brian. I'll leave, you motherfucker.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: what university of phoenix the online college of smith and wesson hey jackass you are in the military if you don't know how to fucking take a gun apart and clean it then that's your problem fuck even gomer pile from fucking the movie knew how to take a gun apart faster than anybody
Speaker: Yes. It's that time. Yes, please. Let's end the show. I've already taken enough abuse. Put a bullet in this baby and smoke a joint. Welcome to Ohio. It's over. We got hiding. Field this baby. Whoo hoo. Glicks from Ohio where they shoot drugs and shoot babies.
Speaker: the fifth
Speaker: the fifth
Speaker: because you know you know like you know why i have to do more therapy than just monday because of you okay because you know i'm sorry i'm sorry the common denominator here steven i believe i believe Jason Aldean has a song that's called the reason and you know i feel like i'm the reason for you so i love Jason Aldean i tolerate you and
Speaker: I feel a lot of people tolerate me. Don't worry about it. I barely. I listen to being the first. Don't do therapy. Do drugs. Be a man. Be a man podcast is great. That shit is funny. I love when he's I love when he was like, when you get into an argument with your wife,
Speaker: cause a car accident. Don't talk to the broad. Be a man. Um, Connor, we're slow to get sassons. Thank you very much. Don't call me a boy. That's offensive. That's right. Yeah. Glick doesn't consider himself a boy. That's watch. He's just the Sasquatch. He's the champ's watch. We'll just have the mentality of 13 year olds.
Speaker: Much like Jeff's wife does, and she does all the manly things around the house, and she has her thoughts outside of her brain. I'm a man. Yeah, that doesn't happen. I built a disabled woman man. All right, can we end this show? I took the charge out of a man. Nope, nope, nope.
Speaker: No, I shaved it I won't do it because he's afraid his son's gonna reverse it and hit him with a rock bottom Yeah, okay, actually he's sick
Speaker: He claims he's sick today. He came into, he came into the bedroom because I'm working for my bedroom. Cause I got to fix the fan in my office and he, he comes in, he says, dad, I'm sick. 20 minutes later, he's outside playing with the basketball and the other kids. And I'm like, I thought you were sick, dude. Yeah. That's okay. I was told, I was told by my, my middle daughter today. I feel like since you're taking Friday off that, uh,
Speaker: You should let me skip school on Friday, bro. Yeah. Cause that makes sense. I was like, you obviously go to school cause you can't math. You are already going to skip school on Friday. However, now you're going to go to school and your brother gets to skip school. Well, Austin's getting her pen. My oldest one, she's getting her pen.
Speaker: and and and I was gonna work a half day and my boss was like, it was like, take the whole day off. Oh my god. We're a little epic in the show. We're a little. Listen, Linda. Connor D. I can I can I can pull over them on this motherfucker. Yeah, I'll take it, right? Take these nuts in your mouth.
Speaker: Hey, hey, hey, hey, Dan Schneider. Hey, buddy. Do you still love the show? You know, you know, we can start calling Connor. Connor D. Connor D with the highlight with the headline. ESJ and Snyder Jr. Yeah.
Speaker: I'm missing. He didn't even comb his hair. Dude, I've been doing schoolwork for the last eight hours. Settle down, Alyssa. I worked for eight hours. I still showed up on time. Cool. I worked eight hours. I still showed up on time. I've also been babysitting my wife's first child. I know why she showed up. Because my wife's first child. I don't know why she showed up either. Thanks, Glick.
Speaker: What did he say? I'm like, I don't even know I showed up and Glick's like, yeah, I don't know why you showed up either. It's like, oh, thanks. That makes three of us, let's be honest. I'm definitely the one who should be getting shit on. And Steven still gets shit on. It's hilarious. It's great. Well, we're trying to get into Rage Quit. Oh, my fucking god. We do, right? No, we do. Yeah, it's time.
Speaker: of the
Speaker: the fifth
Speaker: Like, first and foremost, be fucking better. Like, I don't know, join the military, go kill a bunch of babies and innocent women, like Connor did. I don't know, like, I don't know, like, like, go - That was in the military too! Just fucking be better, bro, like -
Speaker: They won't let me join the military. Yeah, I wouldn't let you join the military. Or Jeff, reason why you kill yourself. You do realize nobody's going to feel bad. We're just going to make more fun of you. You'll get to wherever you're going and be like, really, dude? Really, dude? You really need to die. Take your seat. Take your seat outside the meeting. That's where you live. Your idiot friends will be here soon enough.
Speaker: and then and then when fucking as soon as you guys get up there and all of us die and you're sitting outside the gates, I just let you guys pass. It's going to be like a sweet little VIP room and then it's just going to be us making fun of you for the rest of eternity. There's a VIP room and then there's the nonsensical nonsense room that's better than the VIP room. We weren't going to get in. That's the thing we weren't going to get in and then we let you on the show and that gave us credit.
Speaker: Yeah. So, shut the **** up, Connor. And then you offed yourself and then we lost our credit. You really kind of screwed us to me. Yeah, you dropped the ball, Jarvis. I feel like if you ever got the message from my wife that something did happen to me, Glick's like, god, about **** time. No, I would actually feel horrible. We wait to do that on the show.
Speaker: Yeah. I wouldn't say it. Fucking jumps over there with the fucking like eyedrops going like, hold on, Glick. I got to make me look like I'm crying. Oh, my God. Jeremy, where did you go? Yeah, if I ever got that message, I would feel absolutely horrible because it didn't happen on the show. Yeah. The rule number one of being on this show, if you're going to kill yourself, you got to do it all live. Evidently, he's never gotten that message.
Speaker: I tell Jeff all the time when those seventy -five Big Macs, he has a day, finally catch up to him and he has a grabber. He better have that grabber on this goddamn show. There's no way. Jeff's like, Jeff's like grabbing his chest. I'm coming, Elizabeth. Because if he doesn't have that grabber on the show, I'm going to get a Ouija board and a **** psychic and a medium and we're going to have a we're going to have to just end the show, please. Just so I can come from the face and be like, dude,
Speaker: really like Jesus you know how great the ratings would have been if you would have had a forever on the show we blame you for our low ratings we could have been an influencer like some people that we know but
Speaker: You could have done a super collab because of you, but no. What's happening on today's show, suicide pack? How about you? Let's be honest. If it's going to happen, it's going to be murder, suicide pack.
Speaker: the fifth
Speaker: All right, since we need a word to wisdom. I'm going to get something to eat, and I might need to go to bed. Now who's become the D? He's looking up something online to read for his final thoughts. OK, I'm sorry, Jeff, that I can't pull something out my ass. No, no, no, no, no, no. You don't have an issue getting it in. You just have issues getting it out? Yeah. Fuck you, Connor.
Speaker: Wow. It may be true but. Jeff, I I gave Jarvis permission to. Oh, okay. Now, I look at this. Great show prep Jarvis. Jesus Christ. He had all this time. You should. You should have heard him on Monday nights before I gave him permission to look up **** Oh, really? Was it that bad? It was like, it was like,
Speaker: If you have one berry and two birds in your hand, then the rainbows and the trees will bloom after the rain and you can ride out every ice cream. If you're going down the river in your canoe and you're
Speaker: Your paddle loses a wheel. How many pancakes does it take? So Jarvis, put your headphones back on princess. Let's always change his name to princess. Put your headphones back on. I got to tell you something. Okay. So on Wednesdays and Saturday nights, what I need you to do.
Speaker: And you can, you can look up a quote if you want to. It doesn't have to be inspirational or anything like that. It could be as easy as peace out. Hey, calm down. I have a deeper voice in him. You sound like a fucking woman. You sound like Mickey Mouse. Calm down.
Speaker: Um, Wednesdays and Saturday nights Jarvis, you are official. You need a catchphrase. Don't steal it from nobody either. Don't, don't, don't, don't do the rock. If you smell what the Jarvis is cooking.
Speaker: and don't and don't do fucking like actually no do it do that so we can make funny view more oh like any time i come up with the categories i won't be made fun of it okay jeff it don't try to be clever and pull fucking denier i'll be like you watching my podcast are you watching my podcast you must be watching my podcast because my podcast is the only one like hey yo you fucking with the jinxy cat like what the fuck reg fucker it's actually really good
Speaker: actually i'm not bad i kind of like that i kind of like that i'm not mad okay that's my new catchphrase now i have oh my god see he fucking told me not to do it much like the intro gets longer every actually actually jeff jeffrey i bequeath that on you oh you can use that
Speaker: Do it I'm gonna do it in my Christopher Walken voice That's the point Let me shut the fuck up Connor
Speaker: Coddard, Coddard B literally says, fuck you, Redwood Forest, because he stole his fucking catchphrase from Ron Burgundy. The only difference is that he just adds a different city in California every time. But it works. Anyways. It's not great. Facts on facts. It's consistent. Hint shirt will probably be the number one selling merch on our shirt. Yeah, it's not great.
Speaker: You remember our first couple episodes people got mad because we weren't doing our catchphrase Yeah, we were just leaving the show We did a couple of we did a couple episodes where we're doing the same catchphrases each time and then we didn't do them for like three episodes of people like what the fuck dude Here's only one person
Speaker: Anywho, it was all Alyssa. She knew about the show before I did. Trust me, this is the only beginning of the ride. We make it a point to top ourselves. Once again, is that the line? Oh no, wait.
Speaker: Jeffrey. Hold this. Jeffrey, we have crossed the line. Move that line another thing. That we crossed the line. Alright, I think I got my catchphrase for tonight. Jeffrey, we have crossed the line again. You should like you really need to try that for one episode.
Speaker: All right, you know what? Saturday night. Saturday night. You got to do the literally voice. Literally. Literally. I went down to the start. So Saturday night, I'm going to try to do that voice as long as I can and as much as I can. He gives up after like one sentence. I give it 15 minutes. Great. I give it a sentence.
Speaker: Did you guys not hear what I just said? I was like, you're going to be bored of it, and you're going to be like, oh, I'm a champ. And there's much to like, man. So even if I start the show and I'm doing it for like the first hour, and then it fades out.
Speaker: I mean if you're gonna kill yourself
Speaker: Was Kermit the Frog just talking about suicide awareness? Could you imagine me doing that voice when we were talking about Esther Kutcher and Pete Dittler? Actually, that would have probably been fucking cold.
Speaker: Saturday. Saturday. Saturday. Saturday night. My plan is to do that to do that voice as much as I possibly can. Um. Nonsense go nonsense Saturday night. Monty Python show. Jesus Christ. Thank you guys for listening. Thank you guys for hanging out. Hopefully you enjoyed the show tonight. Thank you to Talking Shit, SHTTT, Mark and Brian. We're both here hanging out with us tonight. Make sure you tune in tomorrow night.
Speaker: uh talking shit will be live at 8 pm on facebook and youtube they've got uh uh Bryce Tucker will be in the house and um good real hunting brent from good real hunting brent from good real hunting will be there and also special guests because they never bothered to ask us to fucking do it i always cut them down i'll i'll i'll have to see what's going on uh
Speaker: If I'm not there on the show, I'll at least make the comments, but the guys are going to be doing their, their WrestleMania picks, baby. WrestleMania is right around the corner. This Saturday and Sunday night, uh, WrestleMania is, is, is live and doing their thing. Uh, but they'll be doing their predictions, their picks and what they think is going to happen. And, uh, worst case scenario, I'll be in the comments. Um,
Speaker: We will be back Saturday night with a brand new episode of nonsensical nonsense. Don't forget it is Saturday night with a twist. We dropped the link in the chatters box. It is the open door challenge. We dare you guys. If you are brave enough to hit that link and put into the studio with us and Jeff has pussy in his lap for the first time. Oh, congratulations. Again, tomorrow night broken my pussy.
Speaker: Mar night is talking shit with the WrestleMania predictions. Also tomorrow lady is dropping a brand new episode of Helen's mixtape on three 65 .co. You can check that out. Like PM or to me in the States, uh, eight or 9 PM her time there in the UK. And then after all that late, late night is late night parents. And then Friday.
Speaker: It's been a minute. It's been a few weeks. It's been a while. I'm going to, I'll be back with a brand new episode of Glitz House of Music. Trying to work the magic. I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know either be the best cover songs. My first ever interview.
Speaker: Uh, so we'll, we'll, we'll see what happens there. Saturday night. We're back Sunday. Jarvis, you haven't dropped a new episode in a couple of weeks, buddy. No, last week was the one that I didn't drop one last week. You dropped Mad Max last week. I thought that was two weeks ago. You dropped a new one last week. Yeah. Mad Max, but this Sunday I didn't.
Speaker: the
Speaker: No, I'm being serious because the the movies you're talking about like I'll send you the link but Friday is my gaming channel Yeah Sunday I can always send you it. Yeah, send me a link
Speaker: Yes, so do we have a new episode? Yes, Sunday we will. It'll be the Road Warrior, which was called the Road Warrior here in the States, but it was Mad Max 2 over in Australia and I will talk about why that was.
Speaker: Nice, nice, nice. And then Monday, Jarvis and I will be here. We don't know if Connor D will be here because - I will be here on Monday. Let's go Connor D. Men came for men and then - Unless he gets sick again.
Speaker: Guys total dollars and cents is coming back. Unfortunately Sam is uh has family in town If she's still gonna be out we have we're gonna have a special guest interview Vera is actually also sick. So and with all the stuff we got going on it's we've just been kind of crazy we were gonna do it this Tuesday, but We had board meetings to go to nice and don't forget go go ahead and give nonsense go nonsense. I
Speaker: Check us out on all the social medias. Don't forget there's plenty of shows. Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Fridays, Saturdays. On nonsensical nonsense, we generally do live shows on Facebook, YouTube, and Twitch.
Speaker: The days that we're not doing live shows there's plenty of other content with our friends whether it be late -night parents Helen's mixtape talking shit Jarvis podcast Jarvis demon on Twitch and and don't forget Mondays Wednesdays and Fridays early morning fireman rich is doing his thing
Speaker: But yeah, go check out Nonsenseable Nonsense for all the shows and everything like that at bio .link slash Nonsenseable Nonsense. All the links are there. Don't forget you can also listen to the show anytime, any place, wherever you listen to podcasts at. Jarvis, you raised your hand like you had something to say. I was just about to say, some people have been asking about this nonsensical nonsense network and they're wondering where they're going to get their merchandise.
Speaker: and now he's gonna go take a piss I'm waiting for the ending so I can go take a piss merchandise is coming
Speaker: merchandise is coming soon. That's right. You could get your Connor t -shirt that says, fuck you Jarvis. You can get the Jeff one that says, let me explain. And then you can get the boring Glick one. That's going to say, Hey, I'm the champ. And you know, I got it. Well, if we use some of the designs we had from before, we do have a, the Glick, uh, office max teach, uh, Jersey too. Um, office backs, Jersey.
Speaker: Actually the the merchandise I think things have been a little crazy the last couple weekends With having to go to PA and Eastern everything like that hopefully this weekend Nikki and I can sit down and It's kind of perfect timing baby, that's right at the anniversary three anniversary so hopefully by
Speaker: sometimes we'll we'll we'll launch the store. Excellent. Let's go. And I have not had a chance to sit down there and and I say that because she Nikki has been hard at work. She's made a lot of awesome designs, a lot of a lot of great stuff. We just haven't had an opportunity to sit down yet and look at it and and walk it down.
Speaker: And this weekend, trying to sit down together, not only that, but not only are we going to launch the store, but maybe between her and I, we can come up with some limited edition anniversary stuff.
Speaker: and then we'll be able to launch it at least by the anniversary of the show. Maybe we can launch it by Wednesday, but that's, I think it could be for us to do the season if we're okay with it. Yeah.
Speaker: You know, just a lot of things have been going on. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's been, it's, it's been pretty crazy in our world over here. Um, the last few weeks. So this weekend, like I said, this weekend, and hopefully by this day, when we do the show Wednesday night, it'll be the, uh, release of the, uh, of the merch. Also, Glick, if I was a.
Speaker: the the
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Speaker: Promo code words are hard. You're going to get 30 % off your first month's paid plan. Give it a try. Let us know what you think. We do appreciate you guys. We appreciate you guys hanging out. Gotta wrap this show up. Been trying to wrap it up for 45 minutes now. Um, and we'll wrap it up with a little blacks out mojo. Ladies and gentlemen, two days from now, Friday, the brand new album drops.
Speaker: Holland by BlacktopMojo. Make sure you get your copy. Go check them out on social media. Go check them out wherever you stream music at BlacktopMojo. Show the guys what you love. Give them a follow. Let them know we sent you. Here's a little BlacktopMojo with, uh, let's do Reddit. No, let's do, let's do, I can't tell. That's our most recent single. Let's do, I can't tell.
Speaker: I can, I can, I can't tell If your kiss is telling all your loving self And I don't, I don't, I don't know Whether I should trust you or just go on on Are you the type of girl that would let me know when you lie? Say you're fine
Speaker: I never thought the damage broke I bet she wishes I would choke Another thing I said before And you don't know what it was like To lay in bed with her and I After she turned out the light After she turned out the light
Speaker: I can't, I can't, I can't tell If your kiss is telling or your love is telling God don't, I don't, I don't know Where else to trust you and it's going on You're the type of girl that will let me know And you lie, so you're fine
Speaker: things I said
Speaker: If you don't get to tellin' all your lovin' stuff I don't, I don't, I don't know Whether I should trust you or just go on out Are you a type of girl that would let me know tonight? Say you're fine I can, I can, I can tell If you don't get to tell
Speaker: What's up mojo
Speaker: tell after a brand new album coming out Friday four or five 24. I'll make sure you go get that **** Appreciate y 'all listening as always Jarvis. There's a little man on the totem pole. Let's get to the peoples before we leave tonight. I really don't want to.
Speaker: Okay, we didn't say quote Alyssa every night. There's an old saying. There's an old saying. There's an old quote. Catchphrase. There you go. There's my catchphrase. Catchphrase. There's an old saying and there's an old quote that says silence is a virtue. And I'm going to add a caveat on that. I'm going to add my own little remix on that. We'll call this a Glick remix.
Speaker: silence is a virtue unless you're on a goddamn podcast and you're put on the spot Jarvis. So what's your goddamn closing remarks? Okay. Um, I'll do it in my Bane voice. Okay. Ready? Ready. Here we go. Here we go. There we go. Good. Connor.
Speaker: She didn't do it in her bane voice. She didn't do a catchphrase. Fine. I'll do it in my bane voice. Is that what you want? What? You didn't say anything. You didn't say anything. OK. OK. Hold on. Stop pressuring me. Good God. Once again, stop pointing at Alyssa. You know what? I'm about to be Dan Schneider by school, Alyssa. Right?
Speaker: Jesus Christ, it's a simple kind of goddamn closing remark. No, you want me to come up with a catchphrase that is going to be put on a T -shirt one day. And what do you want me to do? I don't know what you want me to say. I'm not smart. Start that hard. Hey, yo, I'm Jerabishi. I do a podcast. To the left, to the left. No, Beyonce will come after me for that one.
Speaker: I'll have one by Saturday. Just rage quit. And that's how you that's your closer. You just rage quit like I'm out of here. And then you go. That's your that's your place. Save us. Yeah. No. Sorry. I wasn't here. But yeah. Go fuck yourself, San Diego. Actually, no. San Jose. Sorry. Wrong. Wrong San. Fuck all of California. But particularly you, San Jose. You deserve it.
Speaker: Jeff. So we show them how it's done, sir. We work with amateurs. Let's. We do. Please. Deuces. I'm sorry. Oh, yeah, because that's so original and, you know, create that cool. Oh, yeah. Well, here's one for you. He said something, Jarvis. Works. I said something. I didn't hesitate. I didn't call my wife. Ladies and gentlemen, you find yourselves at the crossroads of life. Hey, you got it. You don't know where you're going.
Speaker: Just ask yourself five simple letters, five simple words. W -A -W -N -N -D. What would an nonsensical nonsense do? It's not a catchphrase, though. And always remember, be good or be good at it, baby. Hit the button. Thank you. Hit the button.
