Transcript
Speaker: Cast out by the devil I got fire in my bones I'm burdened with a black heart And cursed to roam Life of the sunshine It's cold on my face Forbidden food on my tongue You threw me to the taste You should try and kill me Try and turn me down
Speaker: Shoot your pistol at me I laugh at the sound And as I walk through the valley Of the shadow of death I come out of the valley
Speaker: Brains by the lightning, bow ties to the dirt
Speaker: There'll be trouble on the rise There'll be trouble on the rise There'll be trouble on the rise
Speaker: what's going on guys welcome welcome to another episode of nonsensical nonsense i'm click as always hanging out with jeff whenever he gets back he decided to pull his disappearing back before the show ever even started but he shall return momentarily you guys aren't already as we say every show feel free to give us a follow on social media at nonsensical nonsense on instagram facebook twitter tiktok
Speaker: YouTube, Twitch, and most importantly, not most importantly, but important, HapsTV. You can also check out every episode of the podcast on Anchor, Spotify, Apple, Google, basically anywhere you get your podcast and jollies at. So go give us a like and go give us a follow. And then Jeff's favorite, go give us a thumbing. Hopefully y 'all have your... Oh my God. Hopefully you guys are having a good week so far.
Speaker: I am on death's bed. I think maybe possibly, but I'm a professional and I'm here. Unlike the little guy who missed his part. If you want to email us for any weird reason, you can email us. We do have an email as well. Uh, and not since school nonsense podcast at gmail .com. Yeah, there's that. I don't know what happened to him.
Speaker: I literally said countdown's coming up and like that mojo is about to roll. He's like, Oh, give me one second. I gotta go. Apparently he's got to go. Uh, like, is it his, his, uh, wife's ass, I think. Excuse me. As I said, I am fighting a cold. It's not covered. I don't think it's covered. I hope it's not covered.
Speaker: but it has been kicking my ass all week and today has been the worst of worst day of the week so far but I'm gonna try to pull through hopefully uh make this shit happen uh try to put a show together here
Speaker: But nothing like starting a show without your co -host, who is so excited. He's like a kid on Christmas when he discovers these new things. And he's got a new show he wants to talk about tonight that he is stupid excited about. He's like a little fucking crackhead almost. Oh, you have no idea.
Speaker: Sorry, I had to give my wife her antibiotics. Don't worry. As I said, as I already told the people, I'm a true professional. You started your disappearing co -host act. Instead of in the middle of the show, right as the show was starting, so. Well, it's my wife has to go meet a friend. Oh, back to meeting a friend. Tell Juan I said hi.
Speaker: But she's on antibiotics, it's our final shot of antibiotics because we don't do pills. Because I hate pills and she hates pills, so... No, you just shoot up. Yeah, exactly. So I just shoot my wife in the ass. I had to give her the hot beef injection. You're right. You're right. When you put liquid in, you know, syringe.
Speaker: When you put this, it's a mix. So it's saline solution and like powder and you mix a saline solution. And if you don't inject it right away, it slowly starts to harden. And I'm taking the air out of the syringe and I was like, hurry up, lay down before this gets hard. And then I looked there and I went, Tyler, you're sexy. Because I just finished watching Brooklyn Nine -Nine.
Speaker: You are a strange, strange little man. Sad little man, I know. What the hell are you drinking tonight? Is that coke? Oh, it looks like the label is black. Show the camera, but don't put it in front of the camera, Jeff. They actually started doing this new thing in Mexico where it says excess calories and excess sugar. No shit.
Speaker: Oh, well, it's like a health and safety thing. Yeah, well, kind of like up here, we have they do it on all snacks. On all of our food up here, you got the health and health and nutrition label or whatever it is. No, the ingredients list in the health and nutrition list, it's there, too. But they put these big black stop signs that say excess calories and excess sugar.
Speaker: Uh, that's basically insane. I'm fat, and I don't know why. I drink 16 gallons of Coke a day, but I'm fat, and I don't get it. So basically, just Coke. Coke is getting ahead of the game, and it's starting down there. Oh, no, no, no. It's not just Coke. It's not just Coke. It's every snack that is not, like, cooked in front of you. If it comes in a package, like, if you buy a bag of chips, it says excess soap.
Speaker: It's like really no shit. That's why I'm buying it because it tastes good. Wasn't it, wasn't it a couple of years ago that, um, like the, uh, mayor or governor of New York or something like that restricted, like you could only get like, you could no longer get like 44 ounce fountain pops at the seven 11. You can only get like 20 ounce or something like that. There's a
Speaker: Like they were putting all these restrictions on pop and well, whatever you remember I remember when California started bitching about straws and now every time I go to McDonald's I want to strangle somebody Well, that has nothing to do with what I'm talking about same difference The problem the problem is it's it's It's health and safety but you know
Speaker: I will go on a rant, sir. It's time to change. Any other time. Yeah. It's like back in 2013 or 2012. Yeah. Yeah. It was Mike Bloomberg. Yeah. Yeah, Bloomberg. It was a soda ban, something like that. Yeah, I remember that, where people were bitching. Like, you couldn't, if Coke had to stop selling three liters, then they could only sell two and a half in New York.
Speaker: I don't I don't know that three liters are a thing. They are here. I mean, they are for they are for the off brand pop but I've never seen three but I also know they drink Pepsi so but I don't like I don't like like big cake hole or whatever. Uh what's going on Bradley? Ali, what's going on? Uh you know,
Speaker: Oh, are you a juggalo? Yes, I am actually. I'm I'm a mild juggalo as exactly. I don't paint my face. I don't have any any of the clothing line but I do like some of the
Speaker: I do I do like some of their older stuff like that, you know, they're
Speaker: the the original nine cards. Six cards. I I liked a couple of their their goofy ass songs like the dating game. You know, I was never a big fan. I I liked watching the goofy asses when they decided they were going to be wrestlers. They were kind of I didn't see that. Yeah, they were mildly on TikTok today. One of them almost died, I think. Well, violent. Well, I think the skinny one was going off.
Speaker: skinny one was on TikTok. I don't know. I don't know what either one of their names are. Let alone know how to tell them apart. It's simple. There's a skinny one and a fat one. Well, I know there's a skinny one and a fat one. Tall one. I was going to say, I know you're not calling me the fat one. I was being generous at saying there's there's there's there's an ogre. There's an ogre in a garden gnome.
Speaker: But, but I saw, and of course they're, they, they like clowns, you know, when you go to, and this is actually a true fact. If you go to clown college, you pick your clown face. That's your clown face. It's not, I'm going to do the tear on the other side. No, it's that tear has to be on the left side, blah, blah, blah, all this stuff. If you got a square on one eye, it's a square for life, you know, whatever. So they're, they're clown face. Cause I'm weird. But the, their clown face is the same each time.
Speaker: Yeah, but still, I mean, there could be a skinny one and a fat one, but I don't know their names, let alone be able to say, oh, that's. I can't really, I know it's violent J and somebody else. That's slimy and that's smelly. I don't know. This is a fat one and a skinny one. I like that they did that remake of Let's Go All The Way. I just think they're, I just, I just, I don't know. I just think that they're incredibly untalented.
Speaker: Yeah, untalented, overrated, and they're a gimmick. That's all they are. And their fan base is trash. And their fan base is all trash, people. So I've never met a juggler that would not look good on the front end of a mattress. 70 miles an hour. I mean, if you want to drive slow at 70 miles an hour, fine. That's fine. I'm just saying.
Speaker: They're just obnoxious fucking people, much like the dirty hippies that follow fish and the Grateful Dead around. Well, yeah, I was just about to say, you know, people that follow certain bands and only those bands just scare me. Yeah. I say that as I religiously drink Pepsi and Budweiser.
Speaker: She's not psychotic about it. Cameras here. I have to put my earrings in my wife. Why do you have to put your head down here? I'm not getting up again. Why do you have to put your earrings in? Look at these giant fucking Wicked Witch of the West nails she's got. And she can't put her earrings in. Yeah, it's scary. Oh, there it is. Calm down, Cardi B, with your fucking nails.
Speaker: She knows what time we do it, what time we do our show. Why is she need to interrupt the costume? Uh she uh she just got uh got home and she's she's gotta go head out to our friends like I said. That's alright. You can be on camera.
Speaker: show your ass to the world. There's only like 200 people watching that. Hi, pretty girl. You guys done at Dollywood? She went to Dollywood again? I'm **** jealous. They got, well, they got season passes. Oh, that's why. There you go. You're welcome. They're doing the, they're doing the Halloween thing at at Dollywood. Oh. So, they've got all the. My wife and I went to Six Flags. We went on Halloween. It was genius. Yeah. Except for she freaked out
Speaker: Yeah, so she'll send you picks. Yeah, I mean, it could. Uh, but they've got, they've got all these really cool pumpkin decorations and then the lights looked really fucking cool up there. They got like the Halloween colored lights. I wanted to have my Halloween decorations up this weekend, but that didn't happen. I'm going to speak with Halloween. I have my Pac -Man. Well, I want it. I was going to set up Halloween decorations with the kids and then summer will be up here.
Speaker: The next weekend, the kids are here, so maybe all of us can put them up while she's up here. Don't take very long. I don't have a lot, right? I don't have a whole lot. Not like one summer I get a house. That's not Halloween. That's not scary, Jeff.
Speaker: It's not supposed to be scary. Yeah, it's Halloween. Oh, my. Oh, I'm I'm. We like the speaking of haunted houses. Got a story about haunted houses and a dead body in a car. I got some I got some doozies for what the fuck news tonight. Well, I do. Some are speaking of speaking of our topic of conversations.
Speaker: I guess last week, Summer's friend came into our podcast, our live, while she was at - You're marrying this asshole? No, she was at church, at prayer meeting or something like that. While watching us live. She was like, she said that we were nasty.
Speaker: She said that we was nasty and we need Jesus and I'm like, I don't think we're the ones that need Jesus. You're the one at prayer group watching this fucking podcast. If anybody needs Jesus, it's you. Summer almost threw up on the ride. I talked to my mom. I was talking to her yesterday and I said, oh no, the podcast, we got new segments and all that stuff. She says I stopped watching. You guys are too filthy.
Speaker: I just tell her how you and I were talking about it on the podcast that we were surprised you lasted as long as you did. I said, how far did you make it? I said, did you make it to episode 14? She's like, nope, I said good. Now she's going to go listen to it. That one's nasty. So ever since she about threw up on a ride,
Speaker: one of the kids that went with them talked her into writing it twice, and apparently her and her friend, Crystal, have to have a serious sit down about the whole moving situation. Well, I don't know about you. I mean, when was the last time you were at Cedar Point? What's going on, Coachy? How old are we?
Speaker: I'm early 40s. I think, I think the last time I was at Cedar Point, I might have been 16, 17. Oh my God, dude. You're missing out. Yeah. I don't ride roller coasters. Oh, I love roller coasters. Oh, my wife is deathly afraid. We went, went, like I said, we went to that six flags in Mexico City, which is scary enough, but we went and they have a, they have a ride called Kilauea.
Speaker: and kill away is it basically it's it's like the tower of power it shoots you straight up or drops or demon drops you right yeah well I'm not one to be dropped I don't I fucking hate you pretty girl be careful later dude they're driving back from Dollywood okay but it's uh we're sitting on the ride strapped in and dude is millimeters
Speaker: just smaller than inches smaller than centimeters from touching the button and my wife freaks the fuck out and says no no no no i don't want to ride on a ride and this motherfucker stopped the ride and let her off and let her off
Speaker: And I'm like, you chicken shit, we just waited in line for two fucking hours. God, why didn't you just write? And I did. But as I said, I was finishing up and I was saying I was calling her. And I said, you fucking. And as soon as I said, Bitch, he hits the button. I shoot up and you just hear.
Speaker: No, I am. I don't ride roller coasters and stuff like that. I'm terrified of them. I'm afraid of heights as we've talked about in the past. Yeah, that's like the only thing. Yeah, no, I like I do. I don't. As a guy who is willingly, I am a big sissy, has willingly come out and openly said that he's going to fight a bear in a kangaroo. I won't ride roller coasters.
Speaker: because I'm terrified of heights. They, they, I don't know, I get really bad anxiety and have panic attacks and everything like that. I get, dude, I'm horrible to ride with. Like if I got to drive through the mountains, I am horrible. Really? Oh man. And Summer don't help my anxiety none because she drives like she's fucking down. You hold your vagina the whole time? Yeah, pretty much. Give me two seconds. I got to fry some chicken.
Speaker: But, uh, summer don't help matters none because she drives like she's Dale Earnhardt senior at Daytona when he was wrecking his fucking car down around the mountains when I go down there to visit her. Well, I want to find a black bear. I don't want to find a grizzly bear or polar bear or anything like that. Black bears are tiny. I can take one of those and I will beat the brakes off of a kangaroo. I didn't never know you liked roller coasters pops. I didn't know that.
Speaker: But, um, yeah, I just, I don't, I don't. Plus, plus on top of it, a couple of roller coasters that I have. I'm making this fuck. Plus the couple of times I have. Yeah. Yeah. I know you jumped out of place. Trust me. There's something seriously wrong with you. Perfectly good fucking planes. Ain't no reason to jump out of them. Uh,
Speaker: outside of my fear of heights I don't feel safe on a roller coaster because it's like when they put those safety bars and stuff down around you and across your whatever it's like they barely collapse on me and I'm not even that I'm big but I'm not that big I was gonna say cuz they don't they don't even come close to me yeah they're super tight
Speaker: And the jarring motion with my back and stuff, I rode a roller coaster, like a little roller coaster, kind of like a kid's roller coaster down in Dollywood with the boys. And the jerking around and stuff, man, it jarred my back so fucking far out of place. I was hurting the rest of the time we were down there in Pigeon Forge. I'll stick to stuff on the ground. I'm perfectly fine with stuff on the ground. Or like the indoor rides.
Speaker: You're a Ferris wheel guy, aren't you? No, I won't even ride a Ferris wheel. Really? I'm talking about like, yeah. Miracle rounds. I'm going to ride the miracle. I want the white horse. No, I'm talking about like, when you go to like Disney. Yeah.
Speaker: they've got like the haunted mansion or like the Pirates of the Caribbean ride stuff like that they're indoor rides and then like lego land no I didn't know I would not do that I was I was out on that one but like lego lands got a couple really cool rides like that like they hit okay I don't know if you've ever heard of them I don't know if your kids ever watch any of the lego shows or cartoons or movies yeah you know Ninjago oh yeah
Speaker: They've got an interactive Ninjago ride at Legoland and you can like fight the bad guys and stuff while you're on the ride. It's a virtual thing but you like you can fling like ninja stars and stuff like that Adam. It's a really cool ride. Cash and I rode it like four times when we went. That's pretty cool. I would totally be into that. I mean, yeah, I am not.
Speaker: I am not afraid of being two feet off the ground. I'll get up on a roof. Two feet off the ground. Yeah. I was up on a roof the other day. They have, at Cedar Point, they have the mantis where you stand up and the seat is basically a bicycle seat. Well, you want to do something really fucked up. My cousins and I used to go in like September and the park's low. There's not a whole lot of people there.
Speaker: October you get more people, October's still pretty slow, but you can literally get in line for the mantis and be on the mantis in eight minutes or less. And what we do is we would lock our knees. And at the bottom of the hill is a two and a half G pool because it goes up straight up right after it drops down. And after about three times doing that in a row, you can't walk for shit.
Speaker: But we were stupid, and we would... I mean, you would almost get like you were a completely fucking... You'd see people that did it getting off the ride, looked like they were completely fucking hammered because...
Speaker: You know, they're all wobbly. They've passed out three times. Yeah. Isn't there a ride that straps you in like laying out like you're like, like, like Superman almost? Well, the Superman ride at Six Flags does that. They have something similar in Cedar Point that's, you know, every year Cedar Point puts in a new one. And the last time I was there, they put in the dragsters.
Speaker: where you literally you literally get in a what looks like a giant um formula one race not formula one what's it called uh top fuel dragster that is you know that holds 200 people and you go zero to 160 miles an hour in two seconds then up a hill and then back yeah oh dude
Speaker: I don't make no sense, man. I don't. Well, how many times do you get the chance to 160 miles an hour? I think it's actually more. I think it's 200. I mean, if I wanted the opportunity to go 200 miles an hour, I would go to like Kentucky and where you can, well, I know you can, there's like NASCAR tracks where you can go and pay and drive the car and do laps around an actual track. I think there's one in Kentucky. They won't let you go over 150 though.
Speaker: don't let you go as fast as you want. Who's going to stop me from going 180 if I get behind that motherfucker and punch him? They got a guy in the car. He rides in the car. They don't have a guy in the car. Chris is over there cutting cables. Fuck you. No, but I think they limit the cars to 150 for that. Listen here, pal. The gears are matching to like 153 or some shit like that.
Speaker: Listen here pal. I feel the need the need for speed I'm dropping the hammer. Yeah
Speaker: No, you just start just start quoting days of thunder. It's a little tight around quarter three. I'm going to go ahead. We're going to loosen it up on the, on the right side. Give me tires on the left side and we're ready to go.
Speaker: What is he talking about? I don't know. He's just making shit up. He's just, he thinks he's in Days of Thunder. Oh, okay, I get it. Rubbin's racing, Cole. Is there a Rubbin's racing, motherfucker? He's like, Chris, that's a wall. Chris, that's a wall. Chris, that's a wall. Rubbin's racing, motherfucker. Here we go. He's like, no. Rubbing is racing, yes. But the wall will kill us. 158, shit, bitch.
Speaker: You gonna let me go faster than 150 or we gonna stay rubbing on this wall, motherfucker. Speaking of. Choices yours. Speaking of. Pop said. Okay. You should go to uh you want to do something wicked. Let's go skydiving. I'm in. I'm totally in. Pops. Let's go. Pops, you should jump out of place. I will.
Speaker: Don't watch you fall from the sky. Well, they'll be empty beer cans down there. Yeah, well, exactly. Well, you know, Clint Eastwood said it best. There's nothing natural about jumping out of a perfectly good airplane. Yeah. Pops used to jump out of them when he was in the army. So, you know, if we were meant to fly, we'd have wings, motherfucker. That's different, though. What's going on, Pat? As soon as you jump out of the plane, you jump for like, what is it, like 25 feet and then your shoe pops.
Speaker: Oh, I think it's farther than 25 feet. Because it's got a whole string that's attached to the plane. No, it don't. Yes, it does. No, it doesn't. Yes, it does. You know, it does. Yes, you do. Yeah, you do. You go through the instructions and they tell you, I think it's like five or 10 seconds and then you pull the cord.
Speaker: And then in real, in real skydiving, you can literally not pull your string until you get to the, you know, like a hundred feet from the ground. I don't think you know what the hell you're talking about. Yeah. Well, you know what? You go skydiving with pop and pops and we can test your theory and you wait until you're a hundred feet from the ground and you pull your cord.
Speaker: No, no, no. I'm literally a foot from a plane pulling the string going. Yeah, getting sucked into the engine. I had the bright idea. My former boss owns the bungee jump here. And we had a client that wanted to go bungee jump. And he's like, well, we'll just drive you over. And I'm like, he's like, Jeff, come on, you drive. I'm like, all right, cool.
Speaker: So we get over there, and I'm like, that looks like so much fun. But I'm such a pussy, and I'm not paying for it. He's like, here, I'll sign you up. You can go now. I was like, wait, what? He's like, no, I own it. Go for it. It's free. I'm like, shit. Let's get checking out now. And I got to the top, and it's only four stories up, but it's over water, too. And I'm sitting there, and I look at the guy, and I'm like, look, push me, because I'm not sure.
Speaker: And I literally, there's video somewhere, I think my boss still has it, of me, when I do fall, look like I'm trying to fly, because I'm flailing my arm. And I get down, I'm trying to get off the bungee, and he's over there, rolling on the ground, laughing at me. I was like, what's so funny? I jumped. You won't jump, pussy. He's like, you look like you were trying to fly.
Speaker: No, I pop said pop said no, you open up as soon as you come out of the back of the plane and then Pat over Facebook said military is on a cord right from the plane. Yeah, but that's military. But I've seen a lot of skydiving shit and usually jump out of the plane. No real skydiving versus military is what I'm saying. Military skydiving, you're attached to the plane. When you go, the plane pulls your cord.
Speaker: Yeah, but you're also jumping out. You're also jumping out. You're also going out of a big ass fucking plane and not like in the military where when you're skydiving or whatever, it's like a little single engine.
Speaker: Yeah. So you jump out of it and yank your parachute and the fucking parachute gets tangled up with the propellers and everybody dies. He's just like, I think I would do it. But, you know, your first time I believe, I believe your first time you have to do tandem, which means you have an instructor strapped to your back. You have to do tandem naked.
Speaker: Yeah, that would be my luck. I'm like, really? I don't wanna go now. You'd be like, man. Your first time you have to do tandem, but once you get so many jumps, you can do it on your own. I would never get to on my own part. I know that, I know myself, cuz I'll be like holding on to the strut of the plane going, I'm not doing it. You can land this motherfucker where I sit cuz I, no, no, no. I watched them.
Speaker: I watched how they skydived in Point Brink. You guys are all wrong. You're all idiots. Actually, there's a movie called... I don't remember what it's called, but it stars one of the Baldwin brothers. The blonde one. The one that found Jesus. The one that found Jesus. Fuck, I don't know. The one that was in Biodo.
Speaker: Was that Steven? Yeah, Steven. Where he joins a skydiving team. And I think I've watched that movie about three times. I don't know what it's called. It's just it's all about skydiving teams. And I've seen that movie and I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. All right, I'm in. No, no, no, no.
Speaker: god damn steven ball has made a ton of fucking movies good lord i think it's steve i think he's in it what steven ball was skydiving movie uh cutaway yeah that's what it is yeah it's fucking weird it's it's like a one of the worst b movies it's it's as it's as good as a b movie you know it's it's straight a video
Speaker: I would say straight to digital copy now, but hell, a lot of movies are going straight to digital because that's, that's, that's where, that's where I'm sat. But speaking of, speaking of movies and television shows, you little crackhead, you were all excited about, about this show that I completely bursted your bubble. I know you shit on it. I did. You shit on it because, okay, let me go ahead and, and, and break it down.
Speaker: There's a Korean. Now, I'm not a real foreign film guy because I'm like, fuck, I gotta translate. Jeff's Movie of the Week. Yeah, I know. I need to build, I need to build an intro. But. So, you can answer. I gotta get that stuff for pops over to you. Yeah. Yeah, I sent it to you. I didn't send it via email but but I. Make your review. My wife came home the other day and she's like, hey, I just saw a
Speaker: preview for a movie or TV series. I want to watch it. It's called the squid game. And the squid game is a Korean TV series. It's like a limited series. I think they might be doing a season two. Now, don't don't completely spoil it for anybody who may or may not want to watch. Well, no, no. The concept is is pretty simple. It's a group of people have an unknown group of people have
Speaker: gone out and they play, there's a game in Korea where they, they take folded pieces of paper in a square. It's kind of heavy looking and they throw it down on the ground. If you flip your, your, uh, florist and you're playing against, you flip there's over, you win. Okay. So this guy, he's broke. He's in debt. He's, you know, got his, he just got his ass kicked from a bookie. And it sounds, it kind of sounds like that game, pog. We used to play, remember that back in the day. It's very, it's very similar to pog.
Speaker: But they're square pieces folded. Yeah. And, you know, this guy says, look, I'll give you 100 ,000 won, which is free and money, WON, which I actually did the math. 10 ,000 won is $83. So 100 ,000 won for every time you flip mine over. And he's like, dude, I'm in. I got this shit. Yeah.
Speaker: And of course he keeps losing, he loses the first time. And he's like, yeah, I ain't got no money. And the guy looks at him with the straightest face and goes, why don't you pay with your body? And I was like, oh, this just got fucked up. And the guy says, you know, the main character looks at the camera like, what? He's like, let me explain. Every time you lose, I smack you. And then if you win, you win, you get 100 ,000 won.
Speaker: He's like, all right. So he smacks him across the face. And he goes again. And he plays for, it doesn't show how long, but it's like a montage of him losing. Keep getting slapped. Finally, he wins. And the guy gives him the money and gives him a business card. And it's got a phone number on it. And what looks like a PlayStation circle square triangle, no X. And he is, if you want to win some more money playing games,
Speaker: give us a call. So he's thinking about it. And he's, he's, uh, he's basically broke. You're just gonna, you're just gonna tell the whole show. No, just the intro and he decides to go. So he shows up and he, he, he calls him. He says, they say meet us on the corner of X and X and whatever. So a van pulls up at like three o 'clock in the morning.
Speaker: And he gets in and he looks around and there's like other people, other people in the van, asleep. And he's like, wow, everybody must be really tired. And all of a sudden the van fills with gas. And then he shows up, he wakes up in a room of 454 people, 456, sorry. And he's number, and everybody's got a number on. And he's number 456. He's the last one. And they learn.
Speaker: that they're going to play games and if you get eliminated, every time somebody gets eliminated, money gets added to the pot. And whoever wins all six games gets the money. If six people win, six people take home the money.
Speaker: The first game, they're like, everybody signs up, they're like, fuck yeah, we're in for it. The first game is red light, green light. You remember the red light, green light, where you run when it turns, they stop. So everybody's like, oh, I got this, I got this, this game's fucking easy. So they run, and it's a robot girl. She turns around, she's singing in Korean. And then she turns, and everybody freezes, and one guy moves just a little bit, like he stumbles.
Speaker: And again, get shot in the fucking head. He's eliminated. It is so fucked up and so good. And each, each. There's nine episodes, which I binge watch all in one day, and it just keeps getting more and more fucked up. But there's a chick on there. And she is. If Monday was a person.
Speaker: Day of Monday. It was a person. It would be her. And you just want to smack her in the face. And then there's there's a couple of characters on there. Just like, I want to knock this motherfucker out. And. They set it up for a second season, but the director that wrote it, it took him six months just to write episode one and two. Yeah. And he's been writing it since 2000. Like 10.
Speaker: But it's number one on Netflix in 66 different countries. For none of them being America. Yeah, pretty much, which is what I assume. But it's one of those things that I don't know if you saw altered carbon.
Speaker: Yeah, actually, yeah, that's one of those other shows that I started to watch. Exactly. Like I was telling you about Deadwood and I actually really like, I liked Altered Carbon. I liked the first season. I didn't like the second season with Nathan and Mackie. But, but... I don't think I started watching the second season. It got advertised like that, where it was everywhere. Where it was like, if you don't fucking watch this, we're gonna shoot you in the face. So it was like, everybody's like, fine, we'll fucking watch it. But...
Speaker: It's it it's got some really good twists and some really good plot devices like the the main character's cousin isn't it and He was he this is the cousin that you know, he's from the fucking middle of nowhere hood And That's me Deanna my kid you better get that homework done and
Speaker: His cousin actually went to college and all this stuff. He's the only one in the neighborhood that went to college. Turns out his cousin is billions of won in debt. And the winners of the game, once X amount of people are eliminated, wins 43 billion won, which turns out to be about $35 million. Yeah.
Speaker: People die for it like it's the crazy thing is the crazy thing is everybody signed up for it Well, that's because I didn't know what they were getting after after the first game And this is really story after the first game people like this is fucked up. I want to go home Yeah, so they there's a rule in the contract that they signed if the majority of people Want to quit they can go home Mm -hmm
Speaker: So it comes down to one old man and he picks - Well, now you've just told the entire show to everybody. No, no, no, no. This is just at the end of episode one. Yeah. They all go home and then 95 % of them come back for the rest of the five games. Hmm. I just tried to - They're all so desperate. They're all so desperate.
Speaker: I just invited pops because I fired you from the top 10 because because I couldn't I couldn't keep coming up with ideas. I was running out of ideas. No, I know you failed. You failed twice in a row. So
Speaker: You did the damn comedy sitcom one that I listened to today. And I was like this motherfucker. And then you did that sports one. So Saturday we fired you. Pops decided that he had top 10. Of course Pops came wherever and we got drunk and pissed off the neighbors and everything. Nice. If you got his intro ready. Cause his intro, I worked really hard on it and I made sure to not show him.
Speaker: Well, no, because you said it. It's because I didn't email it to you. I've got, yeah. Yeah, I pissed off the kids, too. So I'm just going to go with the first one that I have here. Yeah, that's fine. OK, maybe. The last one I sent you is the best one. Jeff made you an intro, pops.
Speaker: non -sensible nonsense presents real men with lack of genius today we present top 10 with parts so what is uh
Speaker: So this is going to be the new segment that we bring on. We're basically becoming Howard Stern with our married band of idiots. I'm OK with it. No. Pops has got a top 10 for us. He's going to start doing the top 10s for us. Yeah. Hey, we're going to start off. I lost my skill there. I've got to learn how to hold my phone. Tell Joanna to let you use laptop.
Speaker: old people in technology. I was going to say, this would be interesting. You won't allow me to use the laptop. Well, you can't figure out your phone. Lord only knows the difficulties you'd have with your laptop. Really? So what? Just start it off nice and slow. Later on, we'll probably get raunchy. That's OK. We like raunchy. We don't do raunchy on this show.
Speaker: Oh, there's a line. They're on. Might get beat. My son, my wife. Worth it. Yes, totally. This is for all the ladies. How's that? This is nice. Oh, and pick up lines. OK. Nice. Nice. I tried this on my wife. She just kind of looked at me like, really? Go fuck yourself.
Speaker: So pretty much what you're saying is you tried all 10 and did not get laid. So these are the top 10 that don't work. I'm doing the same. So no, I did not get laid. But you didn't get killed. You failed already. She just looked at me and said,
Speaker: don't you have anything better to do with your life? Like, no. Well, at least you didn't say the top 10 sports watched in America and said football was number 10. I'm telling you, I went off Google. Oh, you know, we could have, we could, this is off, this is off of, uh, that was just off of best pickup line.
Speaker: You're ready for this **** Alright, number ten. Let's let's let's commit the perfect crime. I'll steal your heart. You still mine. That won't get me a slap. I can live with that. Hey, my wife looked at me like, hey, really? Try something different. Alright,
Speaker: Number nine. Do you believe in love at first sight? Or should I step out and come back in? Yeah, I've used that one. It doesn't work. Why does that not surprise me at all? I've been single for a long time. Boy, you have low self esteem. All right. Joe in the background crags me up.
Speaker: Number seven. Pops comes with his own commentary track. Number seven. Me without you is like nerds without braces. A shoe without laces. A sentence without spaces. That sucked. Come on, man! That's a bad one. Yeah, that was a bad one.
Speaker: That totally deserves a Joe Biden. Come on, man. Are these the worst pickup lines or the best pickup lines? These are not. I don't see any of these working. These are the best. The Saturday was good. Good Lord. Yeah, really. Really. I was going to say, who came up with these? Some five -year -old? I don't know. I've never used a pickup line. I've never used a pickup line either. Well, maybe one or two.
Speaker: I've never used one. I've always been like, hey, what's up? How you doing? OK. Number six. Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I'll give it back. I swear this is written by a 14 -year -old man. Maybe. This is the top 10 best pickup lines from the Big Bang Theory. Yeah, exactly. What?
Speaker: You come up behind here, whatever you say, do you come here often? Oh. You do that all the time. That's not on this list, okay? No. There's not one up. There might be one on the worst ones. Okay. Someone usually asks me that after segi time. Nice. Now, here we go. Number five.
Speaker: There wasn't any gravity on her. I would steal the ball for you. These are really fucking cheesy. Tell me about it. I can't wait. Oh, this is good, too. I read this. This is like the top 10 best ways to get your ass kicked in a bar by a chick. You are definitely not getting laid with these.
Speaker: I don't know. You can laugh that. Let the women decide. These are really supposed to be good. This is good. Know what's on the menu? Do you know what's on the menu? This dick. But me and you, that's what's on the menu. Oh my god.
Speaker: On the side of your face
Speaker: You just admitted that none of these worked. How did they even make the list? They don't work because I'm here.
Speaker: The problem, the problem with these pickup rounds. Number three. This is, this is, this is really, this is cute. You got, you got this one's cute. If you stood in front, if you stood in front of a mirror and held up 11 roses, you would see 12 of the most beautiful things in the world.
Speaker: Joe Joe, but that's no kids in a minute. No, I'm still playing. This kid's getting his ass kicked at the bar. You want to try that line? No, because my number one line is to whip out my dick and say, hey, it's not going to suck itself. And that's why Jeff is on the list.
Speaker: Here's another one. Number two. Number two is, are you Google? Because I found, I just found what I've been searching for. I think I threw up on my mouth a little bit. You want to be smart?
Speaker: All right, what's number one? Number one. You may fall from the sky. You may fall from a tree. But the best way to fall
Speaker: in love with me. All right. I got nothing else. Nothing else. I'm done. I'm done. Look at those numbers. I'm done. That was the, uh, that was, that was, uh, that was
Speaker: You got to go raunchier, Scott. I'm telling you. If you were to use any of those pickup lines, this is exactly what would happen to a woman. Turn them off! Yeah, exactly. I'm pretty sure if you did that, you would literally get laughed out of the bar. I mean, Summer said her pickup lines are Parker. She said Parker fell asleep to your pickup lines, Pops.
Speaker: She said her pickup lines are are better I've never used to pick up light in my life, but one that I've always made one has always made me laugh was Hey, you want to grab a six -pack and go back to my house and play army, man? I'll lay on the ground You can blow the shit out of me Yeah
Speaker: That's like saying, it was like saying, Hey, are you from Tennessee? Cause you're the only 10. Did it hurt? Did what hurt when you fell from heaven? No.
Speaker: Oh my goodness. I have to deal with something. One of my neighbors is here bitching about something. I'm just not pulling on the goddamn rope. Jeff has more problems. Really? Yeah. Well, apparently, one of the kids scratched a car with their bike and now the neighbor's here to bitch at me. So I might bust him in the fucking nose. No. I'll be back. Take your camera with you.
Speaker: Yeah. Oh, this on this episode, Jeff beats up his neighbor. Yeah. Hey, Jeff, take the phone with you. All right. Oh, I feel like I feel like I feel like this is the first time you've ever you've ever heard the show or listen to the show pops with that with that top 10. No.
Speaker: that was pretty bad. I I gotta admit that. I mean, we had a we had a I had a summer's friend. I had said that. I had one in the wife and she said that no, you don't want to do that one. I thought what was the one you were going to do? The top ten positions. Oh, you should have totally done that. Well, I still got it. I got it. I got it put back. We might do that one.
Speaker: Yeah, that's perfect for, for, for Michelle, especially in the top 10. Yeah. Top 10 excuses. Why women won't have sex. Yeah. Especially considering what we have coming up in news tonight. Yeah.
Speaker: Hello, pretty girl. Welcome to nonsensical nonsense. Hey, what can I say? Pop said, what can I say? Well, that's because he did.
Speaker: Nice. Well, did you hear his top 10 list he wanted to do? That he wasn't allowed to do? That he has to do Saturday? Yes. What? It's top 10 sex positions. Oh. As I said, I was like, have you never listened to our show? Do you not know how we operate? These are facts. The what? As I said, these are facts. Exactly. I may be losing my voice.
Speaker: So that's okay. I've never used pickup lines. I don't know if you can hear her pops summers on my speaker phone.
Speaker: You know, just to start a conversation I started a conversation like hi, how you doing? Pops said he started a conversation. Hi, how you doing?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, I don't, I don't think I've ever, ever used it unless I was just being stupid and it wasn't even a pickup line to break the ice or start a conversation. It was typically after a conversation, I already been started and we're just being dumb.
Speaker: Oh, Jesus. You're dirty. You need Jesus. You need to go to prayer meeting with Crystal. Welcome back, Jeff. That was quick. Who does?
Speaker: Oh, I know. I feel like shit too, but I'm a professional. You don't sound good. I think I'm running a fever right now, to be honest with you guys. I my my my my AC is set at sixty two and I'm sweating. Nice. I'm probably dying. It's not that big a deal. Nobody will find me for the next like four or five days. It won't be until.
Speaker: It'd be at least Sunday. It'd be Saturday. What concert? That concert you're security at. Oh, yeah. You think, oh, did Charlie and Dixie DiMello give me, did Charlie and Dixie DiMello give me Corona? Probably. Not the good guy. Dirty TikTok horse.
Speaker: I didn't really even acknowledge them. I think it's both. When I was introduced to these two, like, I guess the one chick's like the most popular chick on TikTok. She's got more followers than anybody. And I was just like, oh, okay. Yeah. I was just like, oh, okay. And didn't really even pay no mind.
Speaker: I more wanted to throw punch the little faggots that were with her, all them old TikTok douche bags. Yeah, a little entourage. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, we've we've decided that pop needs to step up his game. Still, the world's worst pickup lines were were worse were better than Jeff's top five comedy sitcoms last Wednesday and his top 10 most watched sports in America. Just because you have. Yeah, but I didn't have to use them. Yeah, I was just playing around.
Speaker: No, that's, that's different. Like if you're actually using a pickup line, I don't, I don't think I've ever used a pickup line. Okay. Well, be careful driving. You know, I'm really concerned that two lanes, nobody's dropping in except for me. So as we all know, and we've all discussed, you make up your own rules and laws when you drive. So.
Speaker: This is also true. Okay. Okay, I love you. Bye. I love you too. Bye, pretty girl. Be careful. Later, dude. Pops loves you. Jeff said later that she hung up on me. If you're watching this, Pops said he loves you. Jeff said later, dude. But, you know, with this top ten, with this top ten, pick up.
Speaker: It's all about with the top 10, which I try to tell Jeff all the time because it was Jeff's top five of what Jeff liked. And it's all about getting people involved and getting a discussion on one, not aggravating and pissing me off.
Speaker: No, no Jeff pissed me off Saturday when he was like top 10 most watched sports in America number 10 football I was like this motherfucker one two and three were like cricket rugby in soccer What's going on mark how you feeling brother
Speaker: Now it was world because Saturday you were swearing up and down it was American. No, cricket was not on America. Cricket was on world. You said your list was a most watched sports in America and cricket was on that. No, cricket was not on it. Pretty sure what I was doing was watch sports and and it came up for world and I was like, we're not going to talk about cricket soccer. So I put in not watch sports in the USA.
Speaker: yeah well it was there was quick it was on there it's recorded it's a recorded podcast oh yeah and it's out there for the world crickets not there speaking yeah pops actually did save you and actually put out the real list
Speaker: I literally went with the top choices. Maybe it's maybe it's because maybe it's because the Google is different down here. Yeah. I fired you and voluntary Popsie was going to do the top 10. That's fine. One last thing I got to do. In your multitude of things that you do. Yes, because I'm so busy. But with that being said, we're going to take a real quick break.
Speaker: We're gonna kick pops to the curve like the dirty little whore that he is. Throw him a towel, tell him to go plead himself out. We're gonna take a real quick break for pops because I know it's one of his favorites.
Speaker: We're gonna do a little, I can't sleep. And then we come back, we're gonna come back with news and boy, do I got some stories for you guys tonight. Get out of here and get on the sideline. Get on the sideline.
Speaker: Until Saturday. Appreciate the talk, Ted. Pops, thanks for hanging out with us, man. I was actually looking really forward to this. I think it's going to be cool. I think it'll be interesting. Pops needs a headset. I got it. Yeah. Yeah, Pops has got a headset. He's a truck driver. Maybe. No, but you need to. Your mic sounds like it's cutting in and out. Probably is. He's picking up background noise at the house. Yeah, that's what I said. Go get your cheap little headset like what I got here.
Speaker: It's like 10 bucks. I got me, I got me a hundred dollars. Yeah. He's, he's a truck driver. You know, he's got a fanciest. So use it. $150 parrot out there. So use it. It's a hundred dollar paperweight at this point. Cause it's not made in use. It's Sunday or Saturday.
Speaker: Yeah, Saturday. Bring the noise Saturday. Don't be afraid. Bring the raunch. Don't be scared to be raunchy. As long as it's not political and as long as it's not religious, we're in. Yes. But we're going to take a real quick break.
Speaker: Pops, thanks for coming on. Thanks for doing the top 10. It's going to be your new reoccurring segment every week. Look forward to that. Hopefully, everybody listening will like it. If they don't, who cares? Eh, pretty much. I think we're doing this for you. You think we're doing this for you, fuckers? This is our therapy. Yeah, right? We're doing it. All right.
Speaker: All right, let's rock out the music. All right. Pops. Later. Later. Appreciate you coming on. Get that out of there. Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God. This is so new to me. Get that out of there. And a little black top mojo coming up. We'll be right back, guys, with what the fuck.
Speaker: What did you bring back for me? Oh, it's just preoccupation With the darkness underneath There was something empty now
Speaker: Is there something you're hiding? Oh darling, I'm afraid to ask Are you waking cause you're worried in the dead of the night? Why are you staring at the ceiling too?
Speaker: Tell me why you can't sleep I've been sitting here waiting
Speaker: Still out the window of the street What strangers come round the corner Hoping it was you I see I pretend not to notice The distance in your eyes When you pull me a little closer
Speaker: Are you waking cause you're wearing the dead of night? Why are you staring at the ceiling till the morning light?
Speaker: Tell me where you can be You're not the only one who ever needed to be screaming alive
Speaker: Well, that's not good. Well, welcome back to nonsense, the nonsense, guys. Hopefully you enjoyed a little blacked out mojo. I am currently on the phone. Hopefully, hopefully my mic wasn't too too good that it picked up the conversation. I didn't hear it. Because that would. OK, good. I was going to say not that it would be embarrassing, considering some of the topics that we've talked about, basically just saying that.
Speaker: Summer called to check on me because she said, I sound like shit and I look like shit. And she's like, what do you think it is? I said, I just think it's the flu or cold or something. She's like, you know, she, that's what she thought until she lost her smell. And I was like, well, I can still smell and taste. Trust me. I've got some wicked fucking farts. And she's like, can you taste them? I'm like, yeah, pretty much at this point.
Speaker: But but well, welcome back to the show, guys. If you're not already, give us a follow on social media at nonsensical nonsense. Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, TikTok, Twitch, YouTube, Haps TV and go check out every episode of the podcast on Anchor, Spotify, Google, Apple, basically anywhere you get your podcast jollies. Go give us a like and go give us a thumb in as Jeff enjoys way more than he probably should. And then if you want to email us, feel free to email us at
Speaker: Non -sensical nonsense podcast. I literally was doing the intro that that I didn't I didn't get to say it earlier. Yeah, you said it. Oh, no, you didn't get to say it earlier. I said it. Summer was telling me that summer was telling me the story about how she almost threw up on one of the rides tonight. I don't know if she's still there or not. You still there, baby? Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: She was dry heaving and everything. Poor Parker passed out on on the ride. She made him ride. She made him ride a roller coaster and he legit like blacked the hell out. I was like, oh, poor little dude. But it was so funny, though. So it was Crystal Braxton. You know, me and the girls wrote it. It takes you straight up.
Speaker: and then it drops you like on the second run it takes you straight up and then drops you so he was already freaking out like after the first like little drops and like little swervies well the second drop like it took us straight up and then it shot fire out of us and like i hear him screaming mama mama mama and i'm laughing but i'm a horrible mother and i have my hand over his chest to make sure like he's gonna be okay like i got you dude
Speaker: I'm about to tell him, like, we get up, and, like, we go to Trump. He out. He done for it. He's, like, his arm moves. Way in the wind. I'm over there, God laughing. I looked at Chris, I'm all in that, I tell him, I was like, he's locked out. I felt his hand just, like, just sliding against my arm. I felt so bad, but it was so funny, because I've never seen somebody black out like that.
Speaker: She KO'd her son. As Jeff said, mother of the year strikes again. It was funny, but then we got off the road and they rode again. And I was like, Parker, I was a deeper champ. And he looked back and he saw the big drop and the circles. And he's like, I don't like that part. I was like, Parker, I was like, she was blocked out for that entire part.
Speaker: Those of you who don't know, we got my fiance on the phone. Her and her wife, lesbian lover, whatever the fuck she is, took the kids to Dollywood. They lived out of Tennessee, so they all went to Dollywood today. And our son is seven and not a big fan of roller coasters, much like
Speaker: like his dad and she made him get on. Neither one of the boys like roller coasters at this point, but she made him get on the roller coaster and much like any fighter who stepped in the ring with Mike Tyson in the early 90s, he was put to sleep. And she takes that as a proud parenting moment.
Speaker: That's why I said mother of the year strikes again. He might not be able to, I mean, it might be the momentum. I mean, like I said, it's not only my fear of heights and everything that scares me, the way they jerk around and everything like that with my back and stuff.
Speaker: Oh, the wooden roller coaster is brutal. I rode that kid's roller coaster and summer, I mean, summer knows my back was fucked up the rest of the time they were down there. And it was just, I mean, it was still a roller coaster, but it only went like, I don't know, maybe a hundred feet in the air if that. Chris, I don't know if the handle's bending it. Oh, no, I was having fun. I was having fun. I thought it was fun. I barely fit into the, dude, I legit barely fit into the seat, let alone the.
Speaker: the crossbar coming down and the, and I was like, I don't think I'm going to fit this thing in the, in the kid that was working the right. He's like, yeah, you will watch. He pushed out at the bar, like jumped up in the air. He was like, did you hear a click? I was like, yeah. He's like, you're good. Wait a minute. What are your qualifications to work here? Fucker. That's terrible.
Speaker: What is there to do in Ohio? We have Cedar Point. We have Kings Island. Cedar Point has like two of the world's largest roller coasters.
Speaker: Cedar Point has the most roller coasters in one location and any other place in the planet. There's that, I said, I said, I'm gonna come this soon, it's really awesome. I said, they got kangaroos there, I said, the aquarium's attached to it. I said, then you can walk, but the kangaroos, I was like, I'll just follow you, punch you or kick you, one of the two. And I was like, and then you get to fight them back. Yeah, you get to fight kangaroos. I was like, no. We also have a cave system you can go to.
Speaker: Yeah, we got Hocking Hills. I mean, you got the Columbus Zoo, home of the world. Yeah, Columbus Zoo, home of the world, famous Jack Hanna.
Speaker: Yeah. Fucking well. Yeah. Yeah. No, he's not. Jackie was like, is he? Is he? Is he? You know, I did have the conversation. It's like, I think we're going to have separation, anxiety and stuff with each other. But I told her, you know, that's what I mean. I'm like, if you get up with me, Chris, it's like, we'll have you like you're a little space. You're right. And she's like, well, I don't think I can get work. I have to be a sit home. That's why I was like, we'll be in our lives.
Speaker: Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. We're not bringing some we're not bringing some stranger up here who gets to be a stay a whole lot but I'm not allowed to be a stay at home dad. Are you **** eye? She could go live out and she can go live out in the she can go live out in the garden with your miniature cows and llamas and peacocks or whatever weird animals you want. She can be a farmhand. Yeah. You gotta be handy with this. You gotta be handy with the
Speaker: I don't know. Regulators mount up. She gets whatever she wants. She can get whatever she wants in in your little world down there. Yeah. Nobody. Nobody. Nobody loses free. I didn't mean anything. Gas, grass, or gas and I don't smoke
Speaker: gonna pay for something. Yeah. She can pay for Chris's figure. She can pay for my beer. Jeff said she can pay for my beer. That'll keep her broke for the rest of her life. What are you waiting to make me look like a fucking raging alcoholic? She said she just said she could pay for my beer. And that's that'll keep her broke for the rest of her life. She fits. Fuck you.
Speaker: If the Browns hat fits. If the beer fits in the koozie, drink it. Okay. Well, I appreciate you calling and checking on me. I'm just, I'm just dying. Like I said, uh, I feel like shit. I feel like I got hit by a Mac truck. Jeff's confirmed that I sound like shit. You said I sound like shit. Pop said I sound like shit. It's a man cold. You'll be fine.
Speaker: Abby fan I'm gonna I'm gonna I like I said tomorrow I'm gonna spend my day laying on my couch watching watching deadwood and I'm gonna be perfectly happy and content if I die Much like Dolph wondering setting rocky for if he dies he dies I'm not gonna die. I've had worse. No, you know what? You know, there is there's something I will be better by Thursday so you can get dick down
Speaker: And I will be able to eat it to buffet. Buffet. Oh. Oh, flows in town. I just, now with me going to Nashville, like I'm not, like I had to get some off when it's going to be my life. Well, I'm going to be over at Dad's Sunday morning because Pops, we got to be done by one o 'clock, just so you know. Yeah, don't forget about Amish country, said Pops. Yeah.
Speaker: while I'm over there, I'll get, I'll get, I'll get the weed whacker and hedge trimmers. So just remember the wilderness must be explored. Well, I didn't wear shorts or anything, but I wore like workout pants and they have a seam like a mesh that you can see my skin. You can see my hairy legs. I didn't realize that's all I got up there. Yeah. Your legs are about as hairy as mine, if not hairier.
Speaker: Oh, they're probably here. Jeff is currently vomiting. And he also said, just remember, the wilderness must be explored. And then he went, caw, caw. I can't do it like he did because I'm going to a coffin. Caw! I got a machete above my door. We can whack our way through the rainforest. I asked Crystal if she would help me whack my ass.
Speaker: That's a friend. I don't, I don't see me either. I'm calling Chris. Go ahead. Hey, Chris, you want to wax my balls? Come on. Joe said, now that's more than being friends because he can never imagine himself giving me a call being like, hey, you want to help me wax my balls here?
Speaker: We're both old I can understand you mean I can understand you need the help because we're old and our balls are basically dragging on the floor at this moment If what Oh Jessica definitely would but your guys's friendship has seen and been through a lot No Her friend Jess
Speaker: That's summer's ride or die. I get that. So you said you wouldn't wax my balls dude? What the fuck? She watched a baby come out of her vagina. I would totally wax your balls. I don't ever have to worry about that because you're down there and I'm up here. Exactly. I don't think we'd ever have to prove it.
Speaker: I got you, Jeff. I got you, man. 100 % I got you, bro. If you ever need help, I'll send you a plate ticket. I'll send you a plate ticket and a razor. Like, show up, dude.
Speaker: You know, I'm showing up with Gorilla tape. He said he'd be every, if he's ever a millionaire, he's sending me a plane ticket. I'm showing up with Gorilla tape, chloroform and KY jelly. They'd be like, what the hell? And they're like, yeah, who wants their balls waxed now motherfucker. I won't go shit. I'm very fast out.
Speaker: Fifth of Jack, you'll get two shots in and be passed out of like, hey, this chloroform, save that for later. Well, if pops was worried about being dirty with his top 10. We talked about fucking Ryan Reynolds. I don't think we.
Speaker: Not only talking about wanting to bang Ryan Reynolds, but you're talking about wanting to stuff your wife if she dies before you so you can still have sex with her dead corpse. That makes me really concerned that you've had sex with a corpse at least once. You would totally get it if you saw something.
Speaker: Jeff is on a list. Jeff is on many lists. Hence the reason he lives in Mexico. It's just my name repeated 40 times.
Speaker: Mark said, Mark said, Jeff, you, you, you dab. That's worse enough, buddy. Jeff, Jeff, you committed the ultimate sense. You, you committed the ultimate sin and dab. Wait, is Mark in there? Yeah. Mark's in there. Come in the chat. Oh, no, not bad. Pops is there too.
Speaker: I think everybody, I think, I think everybody can hear you. Pop said, Oh, Mark said, Mark said, yeah. Mark said, hi summer. Lots of wavy hands. Pop said, no, I just, Pop said, I thought I would start out easy and then move forward from that. So pops is like, pops is like a friendly racist.
Speaker: was he spit on it and then slid in nice and gentle. Well, that's exactly what I was going to say. Dry, hard, and long. Just go for it. Yeah, that's right. That's exactly what I was just going to say, Jen. We like it rough. Hers is like a friendly rapist. He's like, I know you're probably not into this. So I brought this lube to make things a little bit easier on you. But after this, this is only a one -time deal. From here on out, I'm dry running you. I'm fisting all the way up to my elbow.
Speaker: he says that now next week next week it's going to be top 10 most romantic gifts to get your wife for for valentine's day you know what it is is pop still don't want to go dirty because he's sucking up to joe because he dented the truck he did not he did in the truck twice
Speaker: Yeah, that's what I'm saying. He's still in trouble. Yeah. Now she knows he's got to be a good boy. Okay. Well, I love you. Get back to your show. All right. I love you too. Be careful. Jeff said he loves you too. He heard you. He's laughing. I'm hurt. He's hurt. You'll be fine. Yeah.
Speaker: Oh my goodness later dude said Jeff I Love you too. Bye pretty girl. Be careful I'm actually kind of curious to know how that sounded because I
Speaker: Okay. No, that's actually I'm not good. I'm not going to finish that sentence because I was like, actually we could take callers, but in order for us to take callers, I'd have to give out my personal cell phone number and I'm not giving my personal cell phone number out to the idiots that listen to our phone. Yeah. Right. Well, you know, I probably could actually know. No, but it sounded pretty good except for no, she can't hear me. I mean, you basically have to repeat what I'd say. Yeah. She can't hear you unless I took my earbud out. Yeah.
Speaker: and you'd have to like tape an earbud to the mic or the the receiver no i can just i can just take my earbud out and let my uh... let it come through on my uh... uh... on my computer speaker which is what i did which is what i've done in the past i just i didn't even think about it because uh... well whatever but it also opens up a dangerous precedent because a bunch of trolls going fuck you fuck you
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. So, let me ask you a question. Yeah. Is your wife still ever in her friend's house? Yeah, she left right after I put her earrings in. Okay. So, I feel like we're going to end up going long tonight which is fine because I'm off tomorrow. That's fine. Because. That's why she went out. She goes out on Wednesdays and Saturdays because I'm doing a podcast because she hates podcast day.
Speaker: Mark has not been here in forever. And I said, and I asked if your wife was still out. And he commented, Juan's house. Well, the only reason she, you know, you know, you know how a while back I was her and her friend on the podcast, you could hear them singing downstairs. She has ghosted said friend because said friend is because
Speaker: Well, I never liked a friend in the first place, but yeah, good. Is this the same friend that she was hashing things out a couple of weeks ago? Yeah. And, and my wife basically just cut her off because.
Speaker: this chick is like, oh, you don't do this and you don't do this. She's like, bitch, I got a family. So she's one of those friends that tries to make her feel bad for, I mean, you know, your wife does seem like, you know, she still, she does go out and do things. And I know, granted, it's when we do our podcast, which totally understandable, 100 % understandable. You know, like if we're going to the podcast. She gets jealous of you because I'm spending time with you and not her.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, but uh Yeah, you know, which I mean like, you know when summer moves up here Thanks, man. I actually if you go to bootbarn .com Well, you can't get this shirt, but this is a this is a I love this shirt. I've got a black one, too This is a
Speaker: Uh boot barn has her own clothing line and this is one of their right and I love their fucking brain the hawks
Speaker: h -a -w -x brand and I fucking love it and I got these two long sleeve dry wick shirts ones red ones black it makes you think of me it does but don't tell someone don't tell someone don't tell summer I can whisper and she can't hear it but um
Speaker: So the reason I asked if you were going to be okay going long tonight, because we're already at an hour and a half. And I do have some really good fucking news stories that are out there. And I hate that they're going to be like in the third hour, but hopefully people will stick around long enough to listen to these stories. Yeah. Well, I mean, her and I discussed it.
Speaker: during our knockdown drag out the other day that, you know, she hates the podcast, not because she doesn't believe in it, because I don't spend time with her during it, which it's like, you know, it's not like I literally at one point said, it's not like I'm at the bar with Chris Trinket doing God knows what.
Speaker: You know, I'm literally here in the house, you know, I'm not, I'm last door on the other side of my bedroom. So it's, it's, uh, much like myself, I'm very territorial about my wife. Like, well, every time she goes somewhere, where are you going? Who are you going with? And it's not, it's not like I'm worried about anything. It's just, I want to know, you know, I'm weird. Like, I don't like to share my toys.
Speaker: Well, I think it's kind of a little bit of an insecurity thing on both ends. But I've been like that all my life, so it's no big deal. Yeah, you know, but that comes with the Napoleon syndrome you suffer from. Yeah. Well, on top of that, you know, in the past, I have not always been the best person. Don't trust me, I know. Yeah, so. And she agreed, you know, OK, I get it, you're, you know, but.
Speaker: And when she found out Wednesdays, we're going to try to keep it as short as possible. She was all excited about it. I said, you know, short is a relative term, as that tick -tock I did, short. Well, and I feel like, honestly, lately, as far as Wednesdays go, we've been pretty good. We've been pretty good. And Saturdays,
Speaker: the podcast itself, we do a pretty good job of keeping it at two hours, two and a half hours. But then we do, you know, then we do, but that's, I mean, I don't even, I don't, I don't, I don't post that on the Spotify and stuff like that. That's just more of a way to get out there. Like, uh,
Speaker: I think the last Saturday that you didn't do the after show or whatever. I just went out and I did a live and then I joined a couple of friends of mine live and just kind of getting out there and I've tried to get more active. I think actually this past Saturday night, oh my God, you got done. Pops and Joe left. I was still up drinking.
Speaker: So I wound up going on my buddy, Prince of chaos's Instagram live that hanging out with him for a little bit. Here with another guy, uh, you know, which I wish I should have never done, but.
Speaker: Well, like, you know, one of the things my wife likes to do that I hate to do, and this is the one thing that her and I disagree on constantly, she likes to go to the club and dance, you know, just her and her friends dancing their asses off to whatever song comes on. And I'm fine with that because when I go to the bar, I sit at the end of the bar and I drink beer. I'm good at it. That's what I do. Yeah. But my thing is, I'd rather sit at home, drink beer and watch TV or sit at home and drink Coke and watch TV or sit at home, eat chips, watch
Speaker: I'm from Mexico. I'm from Mexico. I'm from
Speaker: Yeah. Mark or not. Mark Pat said it uh Facebook live drop up Mexico. Uh Mark said uh well Mark was compliment not only not only my shirt but me. He said they look so nice. Not that you need a shirt to look good. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah. But uh he said uh
Speaker: and and what Mark Martin say Jeff, that's her fault. She can join you at any time on the show. She knows that she's very camera. She just doesn't want to. She doesn't want to because she's very camera shy. I mean, she's gorgeous chick. Like she does Instagram, but she will take 400 pictures and use one. Yeah. Well, I mean, I mean, she got summer's approval, some more summers that she was on.
Speaker: I honestly don't think I've ever seen any, I don't think I've seen her to make a, you know, she doesn't have to be on camera. I mean, she joined us that one night when we were dicking around doing karaoke and she was in the background. Yeah. You know, but she, she also doesn't like the ranch. You know, she doesn't like that we go over the deep end as she calls it. Oh, that reminded me. Thank you.
Speaker: Okay, yeah, you're welcome. I don't think I'm gonna give to all these tonight. Oh my god, I got so many good stories. And she gets she gets kind of annoyed when I go, you know, I will, we'll mention something, then we'll take it 15 steps further and then go another 20 steps for fun. She takes she hates that. She's like, Okay, yeah, it's not funny. No, it's even more fun. But it's a different sense of humor kind of thing. It's it's the cultural sense of humor. Um,
Speaker: So that's one of the reasons she doesn't want to join the podcast and she doesn't want to listen to the podcast because she would just get annoyed that, and some of the things that we talk about, especially about her and me, that she doesn't want anybody to know. And I'm like, yeah, I'm an open book. I don't care. Well, I mean, that's, we're, we're, we're in a, it's all you. Yeah, Jeff.
Speaker: What are you going to do? Mark said, no, it's you that goes over the deep end, not us. We're innocent. It's all you, buddy. I'm assuming he's blaming you and not me. That's fine. No, but that's one of the reasons why she doesn't want to do the podcast. But when I'm at home by myself and I'm on a non -podcast day and she's going out, I'm like, what am I supposed to do?
Speaker: Yeah, no, I I totally I totally get that I totally I actually I totally get that 100 % because And this is what and this is what I have to say about the whole situation. There's seven days in a week Yeah, we do the podcast two nights a week Sometimes we do two hours. Sometimes we do three hours Saturday nights. We get a little crazy
Speaker: Yeah. Saturday nights, we get a little crazy, little rambunctious. Typically Wednesdays, we try to keep it, we try to keep it locked down to about two, two and a half hours. Um, so I'm debating, man, all of these news stories. I got so many good stories, but I don't want to go into them tonight or save them for Saturday, but now I can't save them for Saturday. I'm just, I'm just going to put a disclaimer. If you don't like the first two hours of the show, fast forward after the second break.
Speaker: because it's going to be good but um but anyways so so essentially so essentially roughly we'll round up we'll take roughly six hours a week you're doing the podcast right yeah there's there's 24 hours in a day time seven that's uh what is that uh 28 carry the 214 168 hours in a week
Speaker: No, that's not right. Yeah, that's right. No, that's all right. 148, 148, 148 hours in a week. So 142 hours in the week, you're halftime for her. And I'm not trying to say this to sound like an asshole or be a dick towards her, but I totally. If I'm here, she would rather spend time with me than sit on her ass and watch TV by herself.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. But at the same time, on a Monday night, or a Tuesday night, or a Thursday night, or a Friday night, or a Sunday night when she's going out to the bar and going dancing and whatnot with her friends. No, but she doesn't. I mean, she used to. I'm just saying, if there was one or two of those nights during the week, that's a different story than when it's like, hey,
Speaker: And I know the podcast is kind of, I get that the podcast is kind of a joke. You guys aren't doing anything, but we're trying, we're working on something. We're building something here. We're consistent and that's all that matters. Yeah.
Speaker: You know, we all would, uh, I'm gonna be a deuce for a second. This is our brand, but, but I also, I also get where she does, she does believe in the podcast. Cause anytime where, where her and I argue and I'm like, fine, I just won't do the podcast anymore. Whatever. Not that that's true, but.
Speaker: but she'll be like, no, you got you, you have an obligation. You, you're, you're, she, I, I mentioned, I want to pick up hair, Joe, because you were making fun of my hair and I want to do my hair for the podcast. You're a public figure now. You have to look good.
Speaker: I wish somebody would've told me that before I came out here tonight looking and sounding like I just got hit by a fucking Amtrak's. And that's the one thing she said. And it's little things like that that she said. Yeah. You know, well, when we bought the mic and stuff, you know, I saw the price and I was like, oh, I don't know. And she's like, throw it in the cart. And I was like, are you serious? And she's like,
Speaker: She says, do you believe in a podcast? I say, yes. She says, okay, I'm in 100%. I may not like it most of the time, but I'm in. Yeah. You know, that's the, it's something like I told you the other day when you and I were talking on the phone, I was talking to somewhere about it and I didn't go into like all the crazy detail or anything like that. I just told her kind of what was going on. And I was like, you know, I'm kind of nervous because
Speaker: I can do lives on my own. That's not a problem. But when I'm trying to do the show, it's a different story. I'm kind of nervous because I feel like I should start looking for a co -host or another co -host, but I don't want to start looking for another co -host because I don't want to
Speaker: add another kick in the dick to Jeff. Yeah. Well, it was like, I don't want, I don't want to be like, Hey, I'm just so you know, I got a code. I don't, I don't want that to be an additional kick in the dick because at the end of the day, worst case scenario, if I were to do that and then somebody comes on board instead of two, it becomes a three man show, which, uh, well, I mean, that is, it just depends on the, on the, on the, on the, on the chemistry. Yeah. But, um,
Speaker: you know, like I said, I get where you're coming from where she'll go out on a night where with her friends and you're not doing the podcast and you're like, Oh, I guess I'll just because I went through trust me. Yeah, I went through that a lot when I was with my ex -wife and you know, it wasn't so much of course, it's totally different story and totally different situation. But um,
Speaker: She just didn't want to be in my presence. So there was that, but it was like, oh, okay. I was kind of excited because we were both home for a change, but I get it. Yeah, exactly. Go do whatever you want to do with your friends, I guess. My wife used to go out like way before the podcast was, even before you and I reconnected. My wife used to go out all the time because she loves to go to the club. She's a little club brat. Well, I mean, she's a little club brat.
Speaker: I'm not the club person. I, you know, when I was single and, and, and looking for some tail. Oh yeah. Yeah. Because that's where the women. Well, you know, you should, you should, uh, you should, um, cause I don't want to sound like I'm ragging on your wife. You should, um, you know, maybe not all, you don't necessarily not all the time, but like, well, I get her nails done.
Speaker: Well, I'm talking about going to the club with her. That's something that she likes. She enjoys going to the club with her. If she goes somewhere where, like, the kids are covered because her brother and sister are here, you know, and she's like, I have to go do this. I'm like, hey, well, like, I went to Hooters with her the other day. She had a work meeting. Oh, my God. You poor bastard. I can't believe you had to go to Hooters. I know. Oh, my God. I could've literally been, well, my original thought was where I really could go. You went to Hooters list.
Speaker: I have a I have a philosophy anytime I have to leave my house. That's a bad day. Yeah. So, you know, like I went to go get gas for the stove the other day and I was like, oh, okay. Yeah, I'm going through the complete opposite right now. Like I'm looking for every excuse in the sun to get out of my fucking house. It's not worth really. Yeah, because you live alone.
Speaker: Yeah, I live alone. So yeah, well, I mean, I do. I mean, outside of when the kids are here, I live alone and the kids are only here right now. It's gotten worse since I've gone back to school because the kids are only here Monday and Tuesday and then every other weekend. So
Speaker: Like right now I kind of want to get out it's just well, it's just it's becoming a fucking prison man, like yeah, there's nobody here There's nobody to talk to and it's like Jeff don't want to fucking talk to me 24 -7 summer Don't want to talk to me 24 -7. Why the fuck would Jeff want? So it's like I'm like this place is becoming a fucking prison so like that like Sunday I
Speaker: after Saturday, I woke up Sunday feeling rough as shit. I ain't gonna lie, I was feeling rough. And I was in the shower and my buddy Kevin, his wife Snapchatted me, TJ, and she just Snapchatted me a picture of Chilly and she was like, Chilly and football, get your ass over here. I was like, all right, we'll be over in a little bit.
Speaker: I was actually thinking about that the other day. I said, you know, if I was, if I had millions of dollars and I didn't have to work and I can live by myself and all that stuff, the first three months, I'd be like, this is awesome. But after that, I'd be like, fuck, I'm bored as shit.
Speaker: Yeah. I mean, I mean, it's just it just becomes a prison, man. And that's like that's so worse when when you press it. Yeah, it really is. Eventually, it's depressing like, fuck, I got to go home. Yeah. So like, you know, Sunday, we went over to Kevin and TJ's for football and Kevin was drinking. Kevin's a big bourbon and whiskey drinker, you know, and he was like, there's beer in the fridge. I was like, yeah, I seen it. He was like, you know, drinking it. I'm like,
Speaker: I had a rough night last night. He's like, man, dude, really? You're turning down beer. And I was like, uh, next Sunday, next Sunday, I promise next Sunday, I'll, I'll drink beer. And he was like, are you all right? I'm like, yeah, I just, I just had to get out of the house. I mean, I think when I, when I, uh, before I met my wife and when I first moved here, I lived alone for like a year and a half.
Speaker: Yeah. The first year, I would use my apartment as a place to leave my shit. I'd normally go there, shit shower, shave, either go to work or go back to the club. Yeah. And then I'd go home, shit shower, shave, and go again. Well, and that's the thing. I think I only slept there like five times. I mean, it'd be different if Summer and I were going to the dance club and stuff, but I'm also not in the same... I like to go dance. I like having fun and drinking and dancing and stuff like that.
Speaker: I don't like to have people see me dance because I'm self -conscious about it. My wife says I'm a pretty good dancer, but not that I'm dancing. We'll do the whole scene from a hitch where Will Smith taught Kevin James how to dance.
Speaker: Whatever you're doing, whatever you're doing right there, you stop. What cracks me up is that he basically every time the chair is around, he does all those moves he's not supposed to do. I would love to have that kind of confidence to dance like that and just go fucking balls out. I see these guys that dance really well and I'm like, fuck, I wish I could do that, but I'm not.
Speaker: I don't I don't have that confidence over but if I have a few and I don't have to be drunk like I'm not gonna be drunk to dance but you know I get I get a couple beers in me or whatever and I'm like oh yeah let's you know cuz I like to dance and you know I I not only where people have said all you can actually dance I know I can dance I just don't have the confidence to do it sober I don't think I've ever danced on tick tock
Speaker: No, you sent me a video. I was going to say, I was going to say, we'll just keep that between us, but I did post that on TikTok. There's a guy that.
Speaker: used to work with my wife and I at the last couple of issues that this guy, you know, he'd do that, that shuffle thing where, you know, his feet just kind of look like they're not attached to his body. And I'd watch that dude dance. And I'm like, dude, I would love to do that. But A, I don't have the coordination because I'm not very coordinated. B, I would be so embarrassed every time I know I fuck up, even though it would look cool.
Speaker: I know I fucked it up, so I'm done. I'm out. I just don't. Well, I'll slow dance. I'll slow dance like a wedding with my wife. But the fashion is, you know, nope, nope, nope. Not me. Well, where I was going with that is, you know, at the end of the day, Jeff can make John Travolta look like an amateur. I believe it, Casey. Casey said you make John Travolta look like an amateur. I don't know, John Travolta. But where I was...
Speaker: where I was going with that that whole dancing thing completely off subject squirrel as we normally do was like every once in a while not all the time but every once in a while just you know voluntarily be like hey uh your brother and sister here let's leave the kids here and and and I'll go with you
Speaker: you a couple drinks because because you know what happens I had a beginning the fifth wheel because it's it's usually her and her girlfriend's go out there if I go we can stop by Walmart pick me up a cheap wig real quick
Speaker: you might think you might you might you might think you're being the fifth wheel and you might think you're the fifth wheel but at the end of the night at the end of the night and it's probably the next day you're you're that that's one of the it's it's everybody always says it's the little things you know what I mean right so I mean that's why you might feel awkward if she goes does something that she doesn't like
Speaker: Uh, well, like yesterday, when she got to get her nails done, she usually goes with the said friend that she cut ties with. So, you know, I said, Hey, why don't I go with you? She's like, you'll just be sitting there on the couch. I was like, I don't have to be over the kids and I can spend time with you. Where is the problem? Yeah, you should have, you should have got a mani pedi. I thought about it, but I didn't want to scare you. You guys could have got a mani pedi together. No, she just got her nails done because I don't do manis. My, my problem is,
Speaker: The problem is, if I was done and got a Manny petty thing, whatever, I would fuck them up and about the next day because I'm kind of, well, it doesn't, yeah, but it doesn't matter because it's all about doing that, doing something together. That's what I'm saying about the whole going to the club with it. You're, you're completely out of your comfort zone. You're completely out of your world, but.
Speaker: You're going there and you're willing to get out there and you and your head, you're going to be like, all right, I can't answer. I'm so uncomfortable. Why am I doing this? I'm the fifth wheel, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada. But to her, it's going to mean the world to her.
Speaker: much like I'm not gonna speak for you but much like I said a few weeks back when we was doing our stupid karaoke thing which more just turned into more nonsensical bullshit and she came in and hung out with us and was
Speaker: Chatting and talking and everything else that had to that, you know, like they had to mean something to you that If I didn't smoke I would literally do the podcast next to her on the bed Because she hates when I smoke in the house
Speaker: Yeah, but that for her that's like Yeah, that's not that's not that's not her comfort zone, but she went out of that comfort zone I don't you said she doesn't drink but you know, that was something she did that for you So that's what that's that's what basically well Jay opera. How are you doing? Jay? Welcome to the show He said dance like no one's watching and love it. Hey guys need advice if you are able
Speaker: I have leaks in my ceiling in a few places, got them with the summer hail storm and a roof. Is a roof inspection the first course of action? Do they also renovate the interior? Uh, reasons I asked is that you look like real men's men. Would you take an interest in construction and homeownership? I definitely go with a home inspect, a roof inspection. Find a roofer that does free inspections. Yeah.
Speaker: and get multiple estimates. You are the right space or actually the right spot because yeah you are the right spot because both Jeff and I have a very long extensive background in construction but definitely yeah get with the whether a home inspector or a roofer who does inspections. I always recommend three quotes. Don't go at least three quotes you will
Speaker: you may go with the cheapest, you may go with the most expensive, you may go with the guy in between, but you get three different quotes, three different inspectors out there and three different eyes on the situation. On the problem, right? Because one inspector might find one thing and the other two might find two other things that the first one didn't see. And he probably don't necessarily need a complete whole renovation just depending upon how much day was resolved. You probably just need a couple patches and new shingles.
Speaker: Yeah, depending upon the damage that was done, that room that was damaged may or may not need to be repaired or have renovations done to it. The extent of the damage, et cetera, et cetera. But you can get away. Yeah. You know, if it's, if it's, if it's minor, minor issues, you can get away with some, uh, just some quick repairs.
Speaker: So my bad six eyes on the situation. Thank you for correcting me Casey. I should I should have said three pairs of eyes. Yeah, fuck you. Always bust my balls. I would definitely get multiple aspects and and you know,
Speaker: see if it's something you can fix on your own first after said and pick one you think would do the best job for the buck. Actually at all, honestly, to piggyback what Jeff just said, you get your estimates. A lot of inspectors or roofers or handymen or whatever, when they come and do the inspection, they'll actually tell you exactly what you need to do
Speaker: to uh to to repair it and then it's 2021 jump on YouTube. You probably do it yourself a whole hell of a lot cheaper between me and YouTube. There's nothing I can't fix but um I do have a I do have a comment for Casey. Yeah and I already know what his rebuttal is going to be but uh how's it feel to be one and two in Kansas City looking like a fucking train wreck
Speaker: knowing that you barely beat Cleveland, who's two and one by the way. And we have a way better quarterback than Patrick Holmes. I know you don't. You'd be surprised what you could do, Jay. I mean, there's literally video tutorials on how to hold a hammer.
Speaker: on YouTube. I kid you not. People will show you where to hold your hand, where to strike the hammer, what kind of nails you should use. There's nothing that is on YouTube. Over 100 ,000 hours of video gets loaded YouTube every day. Casey said, fuck!
Speaker: And I did say, it sent any read to the hospital, the coach for the Kansas city chiefs went to the hospital after their last game. I would say that we might see you that we would see you guys in the playoffs, but with the way you're playing, that's probably not going to happen. I'll say this on a football note.
Speaker: And I'll keep it short and sweet. This is where I really wish I had a sports podcast or a, or I knew it was sports podcast. It would let me come on their podcast, the Cleveland Browns.
Speaker: played the, uh, the Chicago bears last week and the Chicago bears are complete dumpster fire. Dab beers. Um, they, they sacked the Chicago bears quarterback nine times. My miles Garrett said a franchise record with four and a half sacks. They set the defense had nine sex. Justin Fields has six pass completions. Yeah.
Speaker: The Cleveland Browns defense held the Chicago Bears offense to 47 total yards for the entire game. Our defense went off on Chicago.
Speaker: Also, go to the BBW website and read. Yes, yes. Go to Angie's list. Any of the, any, any, BBU, Better Bureau, any of those, and, and, and read the reviews there and Google, and Google. Absolutely. Google any, any contractor that you have coming. Yeah. And Google, this is summer. What's the, what's the Yelp reviews?
Speaker: Well, AG's list of the Better Bureau are two of the best as far as contractors go. Better Business Bureau is a good way for any business if you're not sure if they're worth your time and money. Oh, thank you for the thumbs up, Jay. On that shit. That's what most companies are afraid of is the Better Business Bureau. Yeah. That's where all the Karens hang out.
Speaker: Well, Angie's Angie's list up here in the States is has really become a thing for contractors. Well, oddly enough, they have a version of the Better Business Bureau here in Mexico. But if you want good service, you mention that place and fuck their they'll fucking bring it fresh beer. If they just cracked one for you, they're like, oh, I got you. It's called Casey said. Casey.
Speaker: Well, Casey said that Andy Reed won't see the playoffs if he don't lay off the cheeseburgers. Oh my god. Oh my god. I can't remember what it's called. Perfecto. But yeah, that's what it's called. Perfecto is basically a better. Hopefully, hopefully, you know, hopefully, we helped you out. We're we're we're not all we're we're not all up at nonsensical
Speaker: nonsensical nonsense. We can help you out. No, I mean, we're the with our background of of what we didn't learn in building trades. I don't know. Like I said, I don't know about you but I think I lost knowledge. We we we learned we learned we learned we learned two things in in in school. Concrete is a boss and don't shoot you.
Speaker: don't shoot your friend in the face with a power washer that can cut four by fours in half but oh my god i every time i see concrete truck freaking freak out i have a nightmare yeah ptsd you just took off your bra nice pics or didn't happen
Speaker: I was trying to see through the camera. I just heard boobs. How do you get that reminds me? Uh I've pretty much taught all four kids here
Speaker: on your bedroom door. Yeah. Well, I, I put a lock on my bedroom door because that's when we keep cash and, and other things that kids don't need to get into. And you don't want your kids pretending that there's a sword like somebody's like somebody else's son did or last week. There's other things here that they shouldn't talk about or shouldn't see, but, um,
Speaker: Uh, her brother, her brother learned, learned a lesson the other day. We were, we were in bed and, and my wife, one of the first things she says is lies, but it's helped me take my bra off. And I'm like, hell yeah. I've gotten really good at it. Help me take my bra. Yeah. Oh, that's a sexy thing to do. I mean, it's not, I'm not saying it's not sexy or anything like that, but.
Speaker: I don't even. As soon as my life puts her head on the pillow, she's passing out. It's a done deal. She's gone. Unless she's fucking wide awake, ready to burn down a house because she's, you know, just raving for. Oh, come on. Much like when we're done with the podcast, I don't know about you, but I'm up for another four hours. Yeah, that's not what I was talking about. That doesn't count.
Speaker: I said Pixar didn't happen. She sent me a picture of her bra hanging on the door or whatever it was hanging on. If summer's... If summer's... I should roll over. I mean, can you undo my bra? I'm like, yeah. As long as I can play with it. If we're at home or whatever, I don't think that... I don't think summer's bra makes it past the front door.
Speaker: Uh, to be honest with you. Well, especially with her brother and sister, it has to stay on, but usually like I said, we have four kids. Yeah, exactly. I don't know how you guys do it, but let me, let me rephrase that. Let me rephrase it. We have four kids and an apartment that is less than a thousand square feet.
Speaker: I mean, I could, I could legit stand at my front door and I could piss and hit my bedroom door. Uh, but I also got a strong scream, but no, but I'm just saying she'll pass out in bed. She'll, you know, she'll take her shirt off and she'll, she'll pass out. And then 20 minutes later, I'll ever go undo my bro.
Speaker: And so I undid her bra the other day and her brother just kind of opened the door and boobies are out. I'm getting ready to do. Well, he's also gay too. So he was, he burst in. He's like, Oh, Oh, nevermind. He bar said, he's like, Oh, boobies gross. Hey, how you doing, Jeff?
Speaker: He and I were, he and I played Grand Theft Auto today. He wanted to redo the missions and he was finishing up and he had the Lester missions at the end where you can actually put money in stocks and then do the mission and then the stock goes up and they sell it. We took him from 30 million to almost 60 million already. Later on with the stock market, we literally spent four hours yesterday just putting the one character back to sleep.
Speaker: We're like, we would buy the burger shot stock, put all 30 million in it and put the guy to sleep for three days. Every every time he goes to sleep and you save, it's eight hours. So that's two. That's three. OK, check it. And then we check this. It's still down. Go back to sleep for another day. It's fucking ridiculous. Well, we got it up. We're trying to buy the golf course. Nice.
Speaker: Uh, as I said, I know we suck. Maybe if you're still watching, um, I do want to take a real quick break. Um, I'm gonna, I'm gonna do Rocky's, uh, dude, I can't get Rocky to send me that other song that he just made. You felt you were like, man, we gotta check on him because he's going through some stuff. I hope he's all right. And meanwhile, I'm like, I love this song.
Speaker: I just say I just think it's a dark song and something needs to calm like well, it's it's the type of music that he does. That's that's that's something he wrote. I mean, I would assume that he wrote that and that's that's his original content. That's what I'm saying. But somebody needs to check on that, dude. But yeah, we'll take a real quick break. I'm going to I'm going to actually speak in Iraqi. I'm going to do this Judas remake that he did from Fauzi. I'm going to go fry some chicken. And then I do want to come back and do these news stories because
Speaker: They're so good. I don't know if we'll get to all of them tonight, but we're going to get to at least a couple of them. And if I have to bring, bring, you know, save them for Saturday, that's fine. Uh, but much like you being a little crackhead and getting excited for your. Yeah. If you watch the squid game episode after episode three or four, I can't remember which you will watch it. And then you will send me a message going.
Speaker: Well, when I get done, when I get done with dead wood, after I watch the C's two and a half seasons, I have dead wood and then the dead wood movie. I'll, I'll, I'll give this good game a try. But, um, yeah, we'll take a real quick break. We're in comeback. Finally. I know we're going long tonight, guys. Hopefully.
Speaker: Hopefully you've enjoyed the show. We got a little bit serious, uh, in the second part, hence the reason why we need a third going on tonight. Yeah. We need a third. We got a little bit serious, but you know, it happens from time to time. We're not always, uh, raunchy. We can be serious. As I told my wife today, they all can't be winners. I mean, I feel like every show is a winner, but I personally, she was coming on one of her favorite YouTubers.
Speaker: just had a second kid and she's like, Ooh, that kid's not good looking. I was like, well, I don't mean to be, I don't mean to sound bias or anything like that. I personally enjoy listening to the podcast. I enjoy listening to our show, which is which, which does sound incredibly biased and, and, and sound like a giant Homer, but I enjoy listening to it. And then like at the end of the two hours, I'm like, really?
Speaker: but I want more. That's it. But at the same time, I listen again and then I go, yeah, that's why I fired Jeff from the top 10. Well, the only thing I have when I re -listen to the podcast, it feels a bit narcissistic.
Speaker: Yeah, we're a bit narcissistic. Yeah, it is. It definitely is. But like, like today, I haven't even gotten nervous. I haven't even gotten nervous. Yeah, I like, I haven't even gotten nervous. I haven't gotten nervous your top five or top 10 list from Saturday. And then I listened to it from last Wednesday. And I was like, oh, this motherfucker with your comedy sitcom. I was like, I'm still mad at him from the sports one. And now I'm mad at him again because of this. I'd forgotten about this.
Speaker: The only time she's actually watched I think the most time she's watched is that I roll
Speaker: You've got to you've got to get me the exact time so that I can screen record that. I think it's 134. It's like 130 to 134. 128 something like that. Maybe tomorrow I'll try to maybe tomorrow I'll try to scroll through and see if I can find it so I can screen. If you fast forward through YouTube, you know how it shows it on a little screen. You can actually see me here over. You see my back go to the back of the or my back screen camera and then I come back and I just
Speaker: Well, I could I could I could screen I could screen record for my phone. So I want to screen record that so that I could so I could post it as a little video or whatever. But we'll be right back, guys. I got to go price some chicken. We're going to be right back. Like I said, if if you if you don't listen to any part of the show and I'm going to put the same thing in the description and whatnot and everywhere I post it, if you don't listen to any of the show,
Speaker: You've got to listen. You've got to listen to the news. So fast forward through everything and listen to these stories because these are by far some of the. Oh, you better deliver. I've got I've got some I've got some fucking doozies. Go go get water on break. Jeff, go get Bob from his work release program in Germany from jail.
Speaker: fire up the jet. I got I got a fresh bag of cigarettes. Fire up the jet cuz we're going to Mississippi. We're going to Ohio. We're going to Colorado. We're staying in the states. I don't know where all we're going but we're oh no, we are going to Europe. We're going to Europe.
Speaker: Get the plane going. So fill up the bus, figure Bob does everything else. Bob can also drive the bus for the nonsensical nonsense news tour. I turned into Charles Barkley. It was terrible. Nonsensical nonsense news tour 2021. We'll rival Pops and Joe's world tour.
Speaker: Amen to that. Well, we'll be right back, guys. Thanks for listening. Hold tight. We'll be back. Enjoy Fauzi with a little bit.
Speaker: Since the song
Speaker: Oh
Speaker: Oh yeah, it's a killer song. And Rocky with his remix of that. Rock Lee from EDM combat. I can say this. It's 100 % a friend of the show. My brother.
Speaker: Musician, singer, producer, extraordinaire. Go check them out at EDM comment on all social media. While you're there, make sure you check out our guys, black .mojo on social media, at black .mojo, all across the board, you can get all their music and everything like that. Also, while you're on social media, checking everybody out, feel free to go check us out at Nonsenseical Nonsense, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter,
Speaker: TikTok, YouTube, Twitch, everywhere. Go give Black Top Mojo, EDM combat, nonsensical nonsense. Go give us all a thumbing. It's a thumbing party. Yeah. Just like that. Also, if you want to get every episode of the podcast, feel free to check us out on anchor, Spotify, Apple, Google, basically anywhere you get your podcast jollies and
Speaker: If you want to email us for to come on the show and be a guest on the show. Speaking of guests, we do have a guest coming up here just a couple of weeks. Right, Joe? 15th, right? Rob Durham Comedy. Rob Durham Comedy. He and I went to high school together, so it should be interesting. He's a very clean guy, but I think we'll corrupt him.
Speaker: I don't know what he's going to do on here, but he's doing big things out and out in St. Louis. Uh, but if you want to come on the show or if you want to sponsor the show, you can always email us at the old email. What's the email podcast .com. I'm staring at the car.
Speaker: But yes, we do have it. We do have our second guests coming up here in just a couple of weeks. My birthday's on the 10th. That's a Sunday, Monday, the 11th, Wednesday, Wednesday, the 13th.
Speaker: Uh, Rob Durham comedy, you can check him out on all social media at Rob Durham comedy. Uh, he's doing big things. He's also a high school teacher. So, uh, I got a lot of questions for him. Yeah. I got a, I got a lot of, uh, got a lot of questions for him as far as comedy and being a high school teacher and this and the other thing goes, but, um, the moment that you've been waiting for.
Speaker: I've been talking about it all night. This is, this is the point where you stop fast forwarding and you, and you listen because you hear you say stop fast forwarding. I don't know. Well, okay. Well, if you, if you, if you hear me
Speaker: If you stop past forwarding and you hear me say this, then just stop. Don't move anymore. Go to the two hour and 24 minute mark. Well, fuck that, I'm not gonna hear that either. Basically after the third song of the - The inscription, damn it. Go to the two and a half hour mark and just, if you don't wanna listen to anything else, listen to this.
Speaker: And this is, this is the reason why Jeff's mom stopped listening. So this is, this is the reason that Jeff's mom has stopped listening to the reason that summer's, uh, lesbian lover or whatever she is. It feels like Jesus. Yeah. It's not our fault. She was on that was listening to us in the church prayer. Yeah. Who the fuck does that?
Speaker: We're like, what's his name? Al Pacino and the devil's advocate, just boiling the holy water. Yeah. Jeff, Jeff, got to give him his. I mean, listen to this. Listen, listen, listen.
Speaker: I'm going to tell you a couple of stars. You like, you like the little, you like, you like how I add those in there for you. All right. So we're gonna, we're gonna, yeah, we're gonna, where to start, where to start.
Speaker: We're going to start as, as pop said earlier, we're going to, we're going to start a little gentle, a little soft, a little slow. Cue the Barry white in the background. Man, I've been collecting these stories since.
Speaker: Sunday. Saturday. Saturday night. It was Sunday. No, yeah, it was Sunday. First story I got for you. We're gonna stay right here in Ohio. Nice. In Ohio, which is up by Cleveland. I was just gonna say.
Speaker: and stuff like that. A haunted house actor accidentally stabbed an 11 year old boy's foot while trying to scare him. But he's scared now.
Speaker: Yeah, right. So a haunted house actor stabbed an 11 year old boy in the foot at a fairground in Ohio and an incident the business says was an accident. The child was, the child was about to begin walking through the seven floors of hell, which is the popular horror attraction in Berea. When a worker holding a real Bowie knife tried to scare him and struck his foot on September 18th.
Speaker: Rodney Garif, president of Night Scream Entertainment, which owns seven floors of hell, told CNN, he walked up to my son and he was holding a knife and his intentions were to scare him. I'm totally on the side of the actor because of this story, because this little fucker deserved it.
Speaker: The intentions were to scare him. No, the intentions were to scare him. But my response, my my son responded to him by saying that's fake. I'm not scared. The child's mother and his mom's name is Karen. Yeah. The child's mother Karen told CNN affiliate it was then that the actor began dragging the knife and stabbing at the ground when he struck the boys crocs and cut his big toe.
Speaker: The workers immediately took the child to the first aid area where they disinfected the cut, which Garif said was about a third of an inch long. It didn't even stab him. It was more just like a little, like a little slice.
Speaker: Yeah, until his mother, you know, they did a first aid thing and then his mother arrived. The boy needed a bandage and refused further medical attention. Both he and his mother continued into the house, into the horror house until they completed the attraction. Karen said, I didn't want to make a scene, of course. I wanted to go about it in the appropriate way.
Speaker: Um, as to why she continued through the horror house. Seven floors of hell and forces are strict rules and protocols, which do not allow their scare actors to carry any real weapons. Only rubber and foam props. Garif said the actor was let go. He had, yeah, you think he was fired. I would hope so.
Speaker: You just stabbed the kid. It wasn't even. Yeah. I mean, it probably went between his toes or something, but it was, it was, it was a minor. He was just trying to add off. He was just trying to add off that. Yeah. Authenticity to it. There it is. Uh, Berea police department, Lieutenant Tom Walker. Fucking Walker is in Berea.
Speaker: Uh, told, uh, told the news that one 22 year old had been charged with negligent assault. I can't explain why he brought a real knife Walker said he should have been using a fake prop or rubber, rubber, a rubber. And this is, this is not me not being able to talk. This is an exact quote. He should have been using a fake prop or rubber, rubber knife, a rubber, rubber knife.
Speaker: So his knife should have been extra rubber. I don't know. Heck, yeah. I think it was a foam rubber or foam, but he said rubber twice. I just wanted to point it out. That was not me fucking up. That was an exact quote from Walker, the lieutenant from the Berea police department. I still said it.
Speaker: That kid got what he had coming to him, a little smart mouth prick. But he said, obviously a poor decision on his part to bring a real knife to the fairgrounds. And he's been criminally charged with negligent assault as a result of making the decision. Despite the incident, Gareth says he hopes customers understand the seven floors of hell is a safe attraction. And the actors actions do not reflect their business.
Speaker: Yeah, Gareth also said that we upgraded their tickets and they went through all the houses and then he said they had a great time and they were done. We've been in business 21 years and we're a very safe event and it's just something the actor foolishly did on his own. He was very apologetic and stayed with the boy the whole time and helped him take his shoe off after the accident. It does sound like it was 100 % an accident.
Speaker: He also said that we upgraded their tickets.
Speaker: Yeah, you know the guy like he did it. He's like, oh, yeah, you don't think that's scary. How about this, you know? Yeah, but but I think I think I get I get why he wanted to be more authentic because rubber knives look like rubber knives and foam knives look like foam.
Speaker: Yeah, I think he was going for more the authenticity, you know Sometimes and I've been in haunted houses. I love haunted houses. I absolutely love them. There's one down the road I actually were right across the street from where I work at that's been in business for years. It's probably one of the most popular ones in Ohio that I really want to go I really want to try to go to this year and They have
Speaker: In the past, I do know some of the actors have had real, quote unquote, props, but they never gone after anybody in the crowd. It's more of, you know, I'm behind this cage and, you know, I have a real chainsaw, so I'm gonna... Yeah, I got a real chainsaw and I'm gonna run it across this metal pipe to create sparks or whatever.
Speaker: But at the same time, the kid was a little prick and he kind of asked for it. But also in that news article on a different page that I couldn't get to because they wanted me to pay for it to read the whole article, supposedly the bowie knife that the actor had was his mother's and she was quoted
Speaker: saying i don't know why this idiot took my knife but i really would like to have my knife back welcome to ohio folks i can see my mom doing the same thing i don't know why this fucking dumb ass took that knife
Speaker: and I want it back motherfucker. Welcome to Ohio, the Alabama of the north minus the incest. Yes. That's mother of the year right there. I don't know why. So she's going to take mother of the year of her summer, making her kid black out on a roller coaster. It's a tie so far. Oh my goodness.
Speaker: Yeah. Like I said, I'm on the side of the actor because I'm on the side of the actor. That kid was a dick because of course it's fake dummy. It's not a real hot. It's not a real thing. We're trying to jump scare you basically. Yeah. We're we're not supposed to be taking 100 % serious.
Speaker: Yeah, but it's, it's, I mean, there are hot, there are, there are like, that's like those, when the actor jumps out at you, there's those, those assholes that push back. You're not supposed to touch the actor. Yeah. Don't touch the actors. So why antagonize is just as bad. I get it. The kids, well, I mean, like because of the internet, like, yeah, like I'll go through haunted houses and, and I'll, you know,
Speaker: depending upon the haunted house or whatever it is and what they're doing and what they're saying like sometimes I'll egg them on like because I'm not because I'm not acting like a hard -ass or anything like that but I want to push them because I know there's people behind me that are shitting their pants so I mean like I've been guilty of walking through a haunted house and dropping the deliverance line of
Speaker: Squeal like a pig. And getting the actor. I got to walk through the jump scare and I'm like, what's up, dude? Yeah, getting the actor. Well, we were down at Pigeon Forge. We went through a Ripley's haunted house. And it wasn't that scary, but it was like I had the girls with me and the girls were kind of scared. And we walked into a room and it was the only actor that they actually had in the entire haunted house.
Speaker: And the girls were already kind of scared, you know, because they'd got gotten by a couple of the jump scares. And the one actor, she was like a nurse. And I think I talked about this before. Yeah.
Speaker: and the strobe lights come on and she's like ripping all these guts out of a fake body and screaming. And when I come around the corner and I seen her, I just kind of laughed and I was like, get them. And when the girls came around behind me, she went like, she went from first gear to sixth gear. Yeah, she just went crazy. It was like, yeah, she was like, yeah, she was rattling the, because she was behind the cage and she was like rattling on the cage and screaming and
Speaker: you know, you're throwing the and and I was like, yeah, you know, you know, like, cuz nine times out of ten when I. That's a normal thing because you're not bothering the actor. You're you're saying, hey, there's two kids behind me that they're going to freak the **** out when you when you do your thing. Yeah, you you want to egg them on. As an actor in there, they're like, oh, sweet. He's in on it. You know, he he wants to just give him a **** show. That's what I'm here for. But there's
Speaker: I'm like, fuck you. Yeah, whatever is fake. No, fuck you, you little prick. You're 11 years old. How about I throw a punch you and see how real that is, little asshole. Exactly. But I guarantee you that kid didn't bother any more actors the rest of the time. No, absolutely. My team is like, should I say something? No. Learn my lesson. I'll fuck up and act scared.
Speaker: He's like, I already got stabbed once. What's going to happen to me? I still have. He's like, this is, this is house one of seven. What's going to happen to me?
Speaker: This song just cut my big toe. I mean, at the end of the day, that's literally all it was. It was just a cut on his toes, purely accidental. But it's just one of those things like don't be a dick. That is that is the that is that is the role of the story. You see those. Yeah, you see those memes like this is Bob. Bob's not an asshole. Be like Bob. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: Yeah. Don't don't be a dick. You know, and again, now I'm saying Bob, Bob, Bob's just hanging out. Bob's just hanging out in the tour bus, minding his own business. One of my ex -girlfriends I used to work with and his name was Bob. I'm like, I'm like, what brand is it? Oh my God. This is like Bob's brand. He's like, Hey, I'm like, Hey, I'm giving you credit. Shut up. Yeah. So shout out to us because he, uh,
Speaker: Speaking of Bob. Yeah. I'm keeping them light. We're working our way up. All right. A top 10, if you will. Top 10, if you will. Tell Bob, tell Bob, tell Bob to fire up the old tour bus. Oh, yeah. In case you guys didn't know, we have nonsensical nonsense, one, our private jet. Now we have a tour bus. Yeah, we have number two. I don't know what the tour bus is called.
Speaker: these stories are so hard to choose from let's uh oh god what did I do oh no it went away oh my god these cigarettes that I got today they're called L and M they're shit we have those up here the world's smallest filter
Speaker: All right, here we go. Let Bob know we're going out to Colorado. Colorado, Bob. Colorado has medical and recreational weed. They're doing things right out there. Fucking mind, Bob. Let's do it. Let's go, Bob. We're getting some edibles. Nice. Edibles. I don't fuck around with edibles, dude. Somebody did you give me a cookie?
Speaker: And he says, just take a little bit. And I forgot. Speaking of, speaking of cookies, man out in Colorado, gave a horse a cookie. Not the cookie you're thinking of. No, no, no. He gave an edible. It's like that movie half baked. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Speaker: Nope. Man accused of sexually assaulting a horse, escapes jail in Colorado. Lock up your horses. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't sexually assault it. And then break out of jail, apparently. You can leave the horse to water, but you can't. Jonah, Jonah Barrett, let's go.
Speaker: Allegedly filmed molesting a horse in June was run down by law enforcement officials Tuesday after he escaped a Durango, Colorado jail that had had him locked up on. This is the charges he got locked up on. Okay. The Durango, Colorado jail that had him locked up on trespassing charges.
Speaker: Stimming from a string of robberies. He was apprehended this time in a nearby creek wearing just as underwear following a 26 minute Pursuit the Durango Herald Explains after being alerted the 25 year old suspect had been spotted rushing past the Home Depot wearing a jail uniform Durango police began their manhunt
Speaker: At some point, let's go shed his jumpsuit. Police say that made spotting him even easier. He was soon apprehended. Yeah, he's just in his fucking underoos. He's just in his fucking underoos. And he looks like a fucking whore. He looks like somebody who would sexually assault a horse too.
Speaker: You know, I'm a horny guy. I admit it. I'm super horny all the time. But I've never been that horny. Yeah. That's a pretty horse. No, no, no. Number one, I'm not that tall. No, no, no, no, no. And number three, I'm the kind of with my luck, I'd get the horse pregnant somehow. Probably.
Speaker: but he wasn't, he wasn't, but this is the fate. He was locked up on charges of trespassing, not sexually assaulting a horse. No, he only went to jail because he broke into the barn. Not because he's sexually assaulted and filmed. No. Oh my God. So it says, it says, uh, it says, um, he was soon apprehended
Speaker: This is a police statement. They ran through the river a couple of times and then out into the middle of the river. Police spoke when Ray sheep said they had enough officers down there to surround him. Let's go as believed to have made his. Yeah. Let's go as believed to have made his break from the jails, recreational yard, where he was separated from other inmates due to keep separate orders, obviously because he was fucking a horse.
Speaker: Okay, we'll go with that. It sounds better. It probably also saved his life. I'm going to **** you up, dude. There, there, there is a video of him climbing a wall and escaping through a hole in the fence. The suspect, okay, so here, here we go.
Speaker: So, so let's go is reportedly arrested in late spring on suspicions of sexual misconduct involving a horse at the La Plata County Fairgrounds. The four legged victim. The four legged victims caretaker documented.
Speaker: The assault on a cell phone. The fucking caretaker was recording it. He was like, wait, hold on. If it's not on the ground, it's a scam. Oh my god. Exactly. Keep going there, Bob.
Speaker: Bob, you're supposed to be flying the jet and driving the bus not banging horses. What the **** is wrong with you, Bob? You stole fish sticks last week. Now you're **** a horse. We really need to replace our driver slash pilot. But he comes up with some good story. Yeah, right. He's good for a lap. We need to have better background checks when we hire people.
Speaker: Okay, my bad. And so it was apparently a camera that was in the horse's stall that was linked to his cell phone. So he wasn't standing there recording it like he was some cheesy porn director. Okay, people do that. They put those wildlife camera
Speaker: you can put a GoPro out there and make sure nobody's **** on yours. But but at the end of the day, at the end of the day, what he what what Lesco was booked and charged with was was trespassing and and and burglary, burglary, which is like what six months like six months and yeah, there was no charge for the molestation. I got to surprise some chicken. Well, the thing is, I mean, it's hard.
Speaker: Because I'm sure it got leaked in the prison that this guy fucked a horse. So people have probably beaten this dude's ass left and right. Which is probably why he escaped in the first place. Because he just couldn't take the six months of beating that he deserved. Well, don't let me forget. Don't forget. I'll fuck. Remind me. Remind me tomorrow.
Speaker: I want to post a picture of this guy. Yes. On our on our Facebook page. Okay, why is it doing that? I'm actually taking a screenshot right now and I'm taking 45 screenshots. I'm actually taking a screenshot right now. Of of our horse fucker.
Speaker: I'm going to lock up your dog. Yeah. No, no. He's he's he's caught. He's he's caught and locked up. So, okay. But I want to put the picture of him. So, but I guarantee you that's like like because I know the trespassing is is like almost like a slap on the wrist nowadays. Well, it was trespassing and I guarantee he was only serving like six months to maybe a year depending on what he stole.
Speaker: But those were the only charges he was facing. He wasn't facing charges for...
Speaker: diddle in a horse. He was basically, basically he went in there and he was like, what's up? I'm DJ diddle diddle. And the horse was like, Meanwhile, meanwhile, fucking Billy Bob Bob's twin brother was like, I got my telephone out. Oh yeah. I'm gonna make a video. I'm glad that you clarified that the guy was dead.
Speaker: You always talk about creepy. The one guy fucking the horse, that's creepy. But the guy in the corner with his cell phone with his dick out going, oh, yeah. Oh, baby. That's a little extra creepy. Basically Billy Bob in the corner was like, he's fucking a horse. Hold my beer. Watch this. You're a goddamn fucking horse. Yeah, like I said, I'm a horny guy. I will freely admit it.
Speaker: Yeah, trust me, I am too. I'm right there. Most men would agree. We're pretty perverted and twisted and Lord knows I've looked up some god -awful shit. I've looked up some god -awful shit in my porn searches. That's why all my porn searches are in incognito mode.
Speaker: But I have never looked up anything bestiality wise and I've never looked at a horse or a sheep or a chicken and been like, Hmm, I like that. That actually reminds me, uh, I was listening to a podcast, uh, several, several years ago and there's a video, there's a website out there called Mr. Happy hands. Now, if you're squeamish at all, do not watch, but it's a guy.
Speaker: getting fucked by a horse. And the only reason I looked it up, because I was like, no way, this is real. This guy, you see this guy, it's very Paris Hilton, one night in Paris kind of thing, you know, night vision mode. Yeah. And this guy, this guy bends over. Not sexy, by the way. Yeah, not even remotely. But this guy bends over. This guy mounts him.
Speaker: I don't know if the horse hit some lube or something, but it goes From zero to a hundred real fast It's so
Speaker: because it's like it went from, it went from he's taken a couple inches to he's taken a couple feet in seconds. And I was like, what the fuck? Is that the guy that died? He died a couple months later doing the same thing. The website's called Mr. Happy Hands. And then there's another website called Glassass .com. That one will scare the shit up.
Speaker: Guys pickle jar and then the pickle jar breaks Yeah, you're searching I Can you're a list Jeff? Yeah, I am the list on those two websites I heard about them on a website on a podcast and I was like no way these are fucking real I
Speaker: Yeah, I listened to like I listened to you know, I listened to
Speaker: I wanted to five the bone out of Tampa. And if you guys aren't listening to one or two, five, the bone, listen to one or two, five, the bone, listen to the Mike Calto show in the morning and, uh, listen to Roger and JP after that, then you don't have to listen again, unless you're up at like 11 o 'clock at night and you want to listen to the Johnny B show. Um, but they'll be talking about like, oh, this chick's so hot, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, who the hell is this chick? Let me look her up.
Speaker: you know, you know, that's why you're you're listening to podcasts. This is a guy getting well, fucking rail this podcast. It was Kevin Smith's podcast. And it's it's him and Scott Moser sitting there talking and they were talking about **** up websites and I don't remember what I'm saying, but he brought it up and I was like, this I gotta see. There's no way to hell. This is real and it was horrifying. Yeah, you and I are not the same.
Speaker: I want to see the **** up ****. I want to see the weird **** where I'm like, yeah. Whoa. I'm glad I'm not that dude. Yeah, I just I just gave promo out there for the my couch show and Roger JP. Not that they'll overhear this but you know, those are two of my favorite shows. They get a rating bump. It'll be because of us. Oh, I'll make sure I message Mike and tell him, hey, you're welcome **** not that he doesn't
Speaker: like two million people listening to them a day. But, uh, so, so that's, that's gone from, we've gone from horror haunted houses or stabbing little dickheaded kids to horse. Where are we going now? I got one for you. That's going to hit a little close to home. Oh, where are we going?
Speaker: Well, Mormon teens on TikTok are filming themselves jump humping, a tactic used to avoid thrusting during penetrative sex, also known as
Speaker: Jump humping. Jump humping. Also known as soaking. Soaking. Hashtag soaking. Yes. Yes. I'm gonna. Of course you are.
Speaker: I know what I'm doing. Uh, because obviously Mormons, Mormons, uh, from my understanding, my wife is Mormon. Yeah. From my understanding, you know, you don't have sex until you're married and sex is only for, uh, what is it? Procreation. Yeah. And you're not supposed to drink coffee, smoke cigarettes, drink Coke. Oh, there's all these weird rules. Well, basically what these teenage
Speaker: the hoodlubs are doing and they say soaking because what they will do, the the male, the male will insert his pecker into his female counterpart. Just put it in. Hence the soaking part. Yeah. Hence, hence the, hey, man, this is the children's program. So, so,
Speaker: because there's no thrusting. No, there's no listen. There's no thrusting or anything like that. Hence the soaking because basically as you and I being construction guys and you know, you slam your thumb up with a hammer and you say, don't worry about it. Just soak it inside her. Yeah. So he's he's putting it in. But he's not doing anything. He's just sticking it in.
Speaker: And then one or five of their friends, because they get underneath a blanket, one or five of their friends, then jump on the bed. Hence the jump humping. Ah. But. So they're letting the motion of the ocean through the work. But they do not.
Speaker: reach the top of the mountain. They don't climax, which to me, in my head, that makes me think, that makes me think that is the secret ingredients of raising a goddamn serial killer. Yeah, because, I mean, I mean, that's take us bending the rules to the point of almost breaking.
Speaker: this is this is this is this is not this is not bending or breaking like hey honey let me suck my cock in you and have the kids jump on the bed we're not actually having sex yeah no no it's if these are teenagers so I know but I mean if I was gonna try it with my wife I'd be like I will have the kids jump on the bed while my dick's in you
Speaker: be like, so yeah, so a bunch of teenagers are, are, are, you know, like a boyfriend and girlfriend or whatever they're, they're, they're getting naked as shit. He's putting, he's putting his pecker insider and then they're calling their friends in and they're jumping on the bed up to the point where he's about to, now I don't know about you, but me,
Speaker: Once, once I was chick, my friends are not going in period. No, but it's not even that once I'm there, once I'm right there where yeah, there, you know, once I'm right there and I'm at that point where Mount St. Helens is about to erupt, so to say.
Speaker: Welcome to don't just stop here. We go. Yeah, you don't just you don't just stop but these World -class self -control
Speaker: That is what these kids are doing. And as a teenager, to have that kind of self -control, that's a psychopath. Because I'm 40 years old, and I don't have that kind of self -control. I was just going to say, I'm almost 40 years old, and I don't have that. Thank God I have not reached that point in my life where it's like, oh, God, there it is. I'm done.
Speaker: You know, you know, I'm still like, oh well, there it is. You ready for round two or what's good? My little soldiers still at attention. You know what I mean? But.
Speaker: So so to get around to get around like all the rules and and I'm not Mormon and I don't understand all the the ins and outs I mean I do know a little bit about the the Mormon religion and whatnot just because Different podcasts and different television shows. I watch about cults and basically Mormonism is a cult It was started as a cult literally my sister -in -law She was using my phone
Speaker: yesterday for schoolwork and then at like nine o 'clock at night, she's like, I need your phone again. I have another class. I said, this is not a clock at night. She said, yeah, but this is for church. I said, look, if you want to get brainwashed, do it somewhere else. Not here. Yeah. So so to get away and get around, get her. Yeah. So to get around all their rules and whatnot, they're not actually having sex. There is penetration, but there is no thrusting. There's no thrusting.
Speaker: and there is no completion, so to say. Yeah, I'm still saying that sex because it's but it's but according in a court of law in a court of law, you are inside her, right? Yes. Yeah, you are. But according but according to the Mormon religion. Right. There are rules that is not sex, much like much like. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. Much like a few years back...
Speaker: and Catholicism, or the Catholics, I think, what is it? Yeah. The girls, the girls were having anal sex because that was not actual sex according to their rules and whatever Bible or whatever they, whatever book they were. Money Python, Money Python, Life of Brian, every spare mistake.
Speaker: Yes. So that was not considered sex. So anal sex was was perfectly OK. So this is the Mormons loophole. So, yeah, what they're doing is they what they call soaking and or jump humping. Yeah, once again, here lies my problem with this. If I if I have two problems, I don't know about you, but if I'm inside, I'll pound in town.
Speaker: Yeah. Well, I have two problems with this. There is no and number two, friends are not allowed in the room. Yeah, I have two problems with this. The only the only time the only time I'm and chicks are your friends, your friends, not mine or bring yours. No, I had two problems with this one. The only time I'm quote unquote soaking
Speaker: is when I try to delay it. I'm thinking of baseball and, you know, kittens. And second of all, don't break it down in the background. You'll last all fucking night. Not me. I've learned that much like Shakira. Much like Shakira, my hips don't lie.
Speaker: But uh well, that's because you're watching it and you're thinking of her and not your wife but no, like I said, the only time I'm soaking it is when I'm trying soaking as the kids say uh is is when I'm trying to to to delay
Speaker: Right. The other problem I have with that is the last thing I want is my asshole friends coming in and jumping on them. You know, you know, well, see, let's say in this scenario, you are on the bed, kick inside some chicken. I'm jumping on the bed.
Speaker: I'm going to put my foot on the back of your ass and shove it up and down like he's fucking. He's actually bumping away. I'm not doing any work here with my foot. Well, I was going to say I'd be that asshole there because they say they get underneath a big, heavy thick blanket. I'd do a fucking elbow on the back. Yeah, right. Macho man.
Speaker: You just come running in the room like, oh, yes. Or I'd rip the blanket off. I'd rip the blanket off and smack you on your ass. I'd be sitting in the corner. I'm next. We're all sharing, right? Yeah, I'm next. I want to soak. I would like to soak. I mean, we're good friends and all, but
Speaker: If you ask me to jump out of bed while you and Summer lay underneath the blanket, no, I'm good. No, I'm totally, I'm totally making it something that, you know, like, so whether it be a macho man, Randy Savage, elbow drop, smacking you on the ass. I'm just soaking it. I'm not actually fucking you in the ass. I'm just soaking it. I'm gonna jump on this.
Speaker: Yeah. I'm just jumping. I'm just jumping. I'm not thrusting it. No, that's not a jackhammer in my hand. Yeah, no. That is one of the worst loopholes I've ever heard because to me, you know, okay. When you're that young,
Speaker: Once you're in, you're almost done. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Especially your first time. You're like, oh, there is no pumping and dumping. It's just, oh, man, I'm done. Did you? I mean, it's not even not even I remember. Man, I remember the I remember the first time a girl touched it.
Speaker: Yeah. Amen to that. I was like, oh, I need a new pair of shorts. It was like, oh, your hands are soft. This is so much nicer. Oh god. Sorry. Sorry. That never happens. How's that taste? My first time, pretty much all my first were all in the same time because I was thirteen at a track meet on the school bus with a uh
Speaker: a girl that was a year younger me, in school, junior high. And I actually got kicked out of school for a week because we did it on the school bus. Yeah, you know, like, well, I mean, obviously, so being a senior, we've talked about it, you know, I'm not that guy, like, I had, I had, I didn't quote unquote, buy the book, lose my virginity until I was almost 18.
Speaker: Um, but I, yeah, but I had fooled around and, and done other things. Right. Like pretty much everything up until that point. Yeah. A lot. And like I said, I back up the first time that a girl ever like touched, it was like, Oh my goodness. This is great.
Speaker: I don't even smoke, but I just started smoking. But, you know. You smoke after a second? I never checked. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. But the first time that, you know, like I said, the first time anything happens, because... Yeah. Oh, no. I don't care who you are. The first time anybody touches you. And I don't know how it is for chicks. I need to ask my wife about this. But the first time
Speaker: you do anything even, you know, you remember back when you were a kid, you know, those long, long, long make out sessions. Oh yeah. You have cotton mouth for like 12 hours. Yeah. Or like the, like the make out. That is so honest shit ever. Yeah. And then you go from making out to dry humping and it's just like, Oh my God. You go. I'm a goddamn king. Yeah. You think I'm really bad at, you know, um,
Speaker: I have to ask my wife how, what about her? I know her first time was me, but my first time was me and she was 18. I would be curious to know. A girl's part of you. And really the only female that I can, that I know that would be willing to probably come on here and talk about it would probably be Summer, but I would be curious to know like what their first experience was.
Speaker: Yeah, like all the way around, you know what I mean? Not just not well. Yeah, that's just I mean actual sex but like not one that has tits but I I'm curious on what what a chick feels when a guy's going on cuz growing at her tits because I know the Yeah, like all the way around like their first experience with everything cuz like like I said my
Speaker: You know, my first job was amazing. My first blow job was life changing. Right. And you're like, much like you had happened on a bus and then we was coming back from a football game. And I'm like, is this actually happening right now? Like what? Oh God. I'll be better next time. Next time. She's like, yeah, there's not gonna be next time. You know, the last 30 seconds.
Speaker: Well, in my case, there was definitely a next time but um, you know, the only problem I had with my first time I never uh the the same chicken I eventually had six sex to completion.
Speaker: uh, the second time, but the second time was in a car and we never actually did it in a bed. Yeah. I've always regretted that. I always loved to just go to pound town for like an afternoon with us. Yeah. But I would, I would honestly like to get a female perspective, like their first time, like first time somebody, like the first time a guy like decided to be DJ, DJ Wiki Wiki on the
Speaker: you know, or the first time. Yeah. I mean, it would be interesting. Any ladies out there that wants to go ahead and explore the experience of their first time, please hit us up at non -sensical nonsense podcast at Gmail .com. We will have you on as a guest Saturday. Yeah. Summer, we're putting this under you because that's like I said, summer's really the only female that I could think of that I know that would be brutally honest. Yeah. Well, I know brutally honest.
Speaker: Yeah. And it'll probably make me. You know what? I might mention that. Well, yeah, because you were her first. Well, you were her first tonight or her only does currently want and Pablo or who come on around that train to do right. But I would be curious. You know, especially the chicks that.
Speaker: because well, I'm more curious. Jigsaw became sluts because of their first time. Well, I wouldn't say because they became sluts or anything like that because I would just be more curious of a female's perspective on this whole situation on like the whole situation in general because. I mean, I know myself personally when I when I was younger and I was first starting to fool around, which I didn't know what the fuck I was doing. Oh, of course not.
Speaker: fuck I'm 40 years old I still don't know what the fuck I'm doing I just go off of her reaction
Speaker: you know, on top of going off of a reaction, you you wait for instructions. Yeah, exactly. Like, hold on. I'm going to read that book again. Yeah, right. Oh, you made it home. And we were just talking about you, baby. And the one thing I've learned, you know, I'm not saying I'm **** Don Juan but but I have been around the block and. Did you take your bra off of the car? Yes, I did. Oh. Oh.
Speaker: And especially with the first time I know I Can guarantee that if you and I slept with the same chick and she did the exact same thing to both of us We both would be like that was awesome. Oh Yeah, well, we're so no complaints Because men I mean you give me a rock and a stick. I'll figure out a way to fuck it It doesn't take much, you know insert dick into something
Speaker: preferably moist and wet and thrust and repeat. I don't know if I can go that far as to fuck a stick in a rock, but I understand what you're saying. No, basically, you know, it doesn't take much. We're simple creatures. We're simple, stupid creatures. And much like we were talking about eating pussy, you know, when you make a woman come, I don't care who you are. You feel like you are the best porn star on the fucking planet.
Speaker: You know, you, you literally, you're Superman at that point and then she'll say something to, you know, shoot you down and be like, yeah, it was okay. I'm like, I just, she'll say, she'll say your dick, your dick's five inches hard. Well, summer, summer made it home safe and sound. That's good. I'm glad you know. Hey, baby.
Speaker: So Jeff and I were talking about this whole shut it. We were talking about this whole Mormon thing, soaking and jump -humping, which brought up the whole first time, blah, blah, blah. And I brought up the point that I would kind of like to know from a female perspective, not the first time you had sex, but the first time you had, like,
Speaker: first kid, any kind of first, first somebody on your pants, you know, first, all that firsthand, you know, finger blast. Yeah. Because, you know, as Jeff and I said, the first time that girl touched, touched our joke, it was amazing. The first blow job was amazing. Blah, blah, blah. Because we are simple creatures. Would you be willing to come on and give a female perspective as like, of
Speaker: Because as I said, you're the only person I can think of and that I know that would be, might be summers. Nevermind. Apparently summers blocked out all those memories. Apparently that was with her uncle summer camp. Nevermind. Scratch that. I was right. I'm just kidding. It was not with your uncle and summer camp. I'm just being a smart ass.
Speaker: Just first experiences with the camp counselor concept of sex for men is just to put it in context for summer. It doesn't take much. I mean, it doesn't matter if you're, you know, the most beautiful chick in the world or the, you know, the dog down the street dude will get off on it.
Speaker: whatever you do and you all do the same thing, dude's gonna come, period. More or less. Where? I mean, Summer said I'm gonna go back to the first time I squirted. That is a talent. Oh no, no, the first time I made my wife squirt was I was like, I am a god. I literally walk around down to the street with my shirt on.
Speaker: that's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm saying. Would you be willing to come on and and and talk about that? Discuss it. Because that's you know, because we can leave our perspective and we want we want to think about it later but because I will have the perspective. Well, you will but I'll be like, I'm talking about this dude about the first time we jizzed. Yeah.
Speaker: But no, not not not tonight. Not tonight. No, I would just say like, no, because we want a female perspective on Saturday. We want to what a female perspective on because like I said, you know, guys are we're we're simple, stupid creatures. And, you know, the first time anything happens is is amazing. It's not until it's not until we've
Speaker: Not until we've felt the hand of a woman on our junk that we've been like, oh, this is awesome.
Speaker: Saturday, she has friends. No, I was I was trying to think like it's not until it's and women are the same way. It's not until you have multiple partners or multiple experiences that you really find what you like. You know, yes, it is very it is very easy. It is it is it is extremely easy to to make a man get off. Yeah, because it's extremely simple. I mean, I've got three times while we're talking here.
Speaker: But but only three. Exactly. Making a woman. I feel like a fucking all star is is is a fucking talent that not all men can possess. It can be taught. But but well, I mean, it's not even that. But I mean, like it's like trying to pick a lock with a tooth, a wooden toothpick. It's not something everybody can do. It takes talent.
Speaker: And I have like a few years ago. Really? So much of the first quarter was only a few years ago. Really? Well, I can say that about my idea. She said not everybody's been able to make her do it. I do. Trust me. I do. It's yeah. I almost drowned. Oh, me too. But but I like the taste.
Speaker: I totally get with those chicks, some chicks are like, I love the taste of cum. And I'm like, but the first time that I got blasted in my mouth with, with the chicks squirting, I was like, this is awesome. This is the greatest day ever. I was like, can we make this a flavor for like a lollipop or something? Cause I would eat, I would buy those like crazy.
Speaker: But yeah, it would be interesting to have a woman's perspective on the first experience on a whole. Not just sex, but on every aspect of leading up to the foreplay, the first line. You can't remember your first time having sex.
Speaker: she can't remember her first time. Oh, shoot. I remember mine like yesterday. But it was just like I said. Yeah, it's it's it's something that that would be interesting to discuss. No, I don't know. I don't want to. When I'm talking about exes, we're talking about like that. Just like the first time a guy ever named like the first. Yeah, like the first time I got down on you.
Speaker: Yeah. Like the first time a guy ever went down on you, what it was like, or the first time a guy ever finger blasted you got Cheeto fingers, you know, like, like even the first time a guy was like you in general, ask your, ask your female friends, you know, they can, if anybody's on the clock or if anybody's, any chick, any, any female.
Speaker: Yeah. No, that's what we're asking about though. Any female that may or may not be, that may be listening to this, if you'd be willing to come on and, and, and because we can give the guy's point of view, uh, all day long because my reaction, Jeff's reaction is going to be the same reaction for the next five, 500 guys we talked to, but I, but we, but we understand that like,
Speaker: Yeah, women women. Yeah, women are different because you guys are complex. I could not. I could not name any guy on the planet that will turn down a blowjob. But I can name names of chicks that will turn down getting eaten out. Oh, yeah, I've known them. And I was like, really? Because every time I get head, it's like the greatest thing ever. Right up until, you know, sex.
Speaker: Really? Summer said she never opened up sexually until after she had Parker. She was too insecure. I totally get the insecure part. See, that's the shit we need to discuss. Because I totally get that. Yeah, as a guy, hey, well, let's push the boundaries. Let's try something. Let's do something. The best example of the difference between men and women when it comes to sex is the guy's the gas, the woman's the breaks.
Speaker: Yeah, but I totally get the insecure part because even now at almost 40, I still struggle with that. Insecurity? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. I don't. If I'm taking my clothes off, I'm turning the lights off, too.
Speaker: It's not even it's not even because I care what I look like because you know, body wise, I feel like I'm I'm I'm pretty decent to look at naked. But then I got this little tiny packer and I know that I got a little bit. So I'm super insecure about a little bit. I don't worry about the size of my car. I really don't. I don't care. Oh, it is 100%. It is what I got. I don't care. But it's my performance that I'm always worried about.
Speaker: Oh, you know what? It might sound cocky. It might sound... It might sound cocky and arrogant. I don't really worry about that. Because, yeah, I know. Like, I know I got a little dick. If I'm not careful, I will be done in about five minutes.
Speaker: I have to really, Summer so she was in a situation for five years. Summer so she was in a situation for five years that opened, opened her up and that person just let me open up. Were you like in an open relationship where you guys just banged everybody and everything? No, I think what she's trying to say is that, that she was able to experiment without fear of being laughed at.
Speaker: Or or I just That's what you want to do kind of thing. I just Cough cough affair. Oh, never mind. I know what she's talking about. Okay Yeah, I know what she's talking about Because I mean that that's the one thing about my wife and I that we 100 % agree on that Pretty much with the exception of maybe a few things we're up for anything in the bedroom Well, I mean
Speaker: taking it. Yeah. I mean, I think, I, I, unless I, unless I'm wrong and if I'm wrong, correct me, but I, I feel like, uh, the first, I could be a hundred percent wrong. The first toy, at least the way she made it sound, the first toy I ever got was
Speaker: uh, after, after I told her to get it in my recommendation. Right. So like, I've used this, right? I'll send you mine. She has two of them, one down there and one here. There you go. Well, but it's like, um, because, but, but as I, but as I've told you, but, but as I've told you in, in previous episodes,
Speaker: having toys in the bedroom for your wife, you don't necessarily have toys for you. Having toys in the bedroom is not an inadequacy. It doesn't mean that you can't get the job done. It's one of those things that just add to the experience. I may or may not. I got two more stories, but I'm going to save them for Saturday just so you know, because this conversation has gone AWOL.
Speaker: Uh, but, um, the one toy that she has two of one here and one there, we use that all the time together. You know, we don't have toys because like, uh, I'm going to send, I'm going to, I'm going to send you this toy that summer has and you will thank me. Trust me because, because it doesn't know, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if, if, if whatever you're doing.
Speaker: oral on her, oral on you, penetration, it don't matter. Oh, it would be technical. This toy, this toy can be used and it will be used and it'll be amazing. It doesn't do anything for you. It's all for her, but like Summer said, it hurts.
Speaker: No, but I mean, Summer said, Summer said she's never had any toys until me. And she said that the toy that she, that basically she got, I don't know if it was a hundred percent on my recommendation. It might've been, I don't know. I don't want to credit for that, but the toy that she got, she said it makes her levitate. But I also know that when I get my beard glazing without her toy that I can make her levitate. So that's like.
Speaker: and my beard's nice and long and full and ready for a week like okay when I was single and I would take a chick home or go to her hotel room or whatever uh my first true true statements I have to make sure I get glazed and make sure she finishes before I get in oh yeah it's over too quick and I look like a douche yeah no I'm I'm a hundred percent of giver I'm with you on that side I'm a giver all day long
Speaker: And yeah, on top of the fact that I'm worried about my performance, I wanna make sure that she enjoys it. And I like to do it, so it's okay. It's my second favorite pastime. Yeah.
Speaker: You can't love anybody else until you love yourself and I've had a crush on me since I'm thirteen. If I if I if I drown, I drown. I don't give a damn. Exactly. It'll. Yeah. It'll be worth it. Much much like much like much like the uh sitting up on my face. But what if you suffocate? Well, god damn it. If I suffocate, if I suffocate, I die a
Speaker: Exactly. As long as you finish, I'm good. Now, here's my question. While glazing, have you ever finished while you're glazing her? No, but I have come really close. I have. And it's just as good as if I was in there. Because I can literally get off on getting her off.
Speaker: It is. There's a, there's a, there's a little gold star for the old, for the old Glickster. Summer said that now I will say you are the best by a long run who has ever ate me out. There you go.
Speaker: I'm not the best who's ever dicked her down, but you know. They all can be winners. It's a win. I got a win. I got a win. I got a W. I got a dub. I got a dub. Yes, sir. I'll take it. I don't get many wins in life. No, I don't either.
Speaker: Was he like, I don't think I don't and I will honestly say I don't think I've ever gotten my wife off with my cock I don't I can honestly say that but I guarantee Yeah, I mean that's that's that's a talent As a talent I do not possess but I can guarantee she will come before I'm done She'll come before me because once I set it up
Speaker: Summer said I don't have hair for her to grab right now. Well, that's that's because you you That's on you son on me Yeah, trust me she does grab my big -ass Dumbo ears, I don't care I got another I got another win in the column. I have
Speaker: I wasn't, I didn't want to speak out of turn because I, I, I was pretty sure that I have gotten her off with my, uh, cock, as Jeff would say. Uh, and, uh, apparently I have, she said, Oh, I think I have, I think I have, but no, it was, it was, it was a definitive. Oh, you have. Yeah. See, I don't have the definitive answer on it because so. Yeah. Got two wins. I got two wins.
Speaker: It's impressive. It's impressive. No, but I mean. I find yourself clicked. Oh, yeah. You're the man. But that's the thing. Another thing I almost refuse to do is, and how can I put this?
Speaker: delicately because we're so delicate but um stupid uh apparently i'm stupid i'll be stupid all day long i just know i can rock your world so it's a win three wins behind uh i will not eat the booty like groceries no no no i'm not i'm not i'm not talking about the booty i'm talking about eating the pussy but your nose is basically in the booty hole
Speaker: Yeah. I'm good. Yeah, you can trust me. You rock the shit out of my room. Especially with that little reverse cowgirl action. Oh, that's awesome. That's awesome. I love that. Boy, I'll tell you what. We can both watch X -Files at the same time. Do we have to watch X -Files, man? We can watch something else. But I'll tell you what, that reverse cowgirl, I'm
Speaker: You talk about being a virgin and put it in for the first time all over again, reverse cowgirl. It's game. That's a game winner. I can watch my ass and stick my thumb in it. It'll give me a thumb and that's a dangerous thing. I do like to play, but I, if I, if I look at the ass, I'm going to finish.
Speaker: Yeah, no, I know. Yeah, you know, I have to distract myself and look at something else. Summer Summer said it was it was like 10 seconds done. Yeah, I don't even know if I'd give myself 10 seconds. Yeah. Well, that is that is another thing. That is another thing that and it might that might be just more on the the small pecker into my world. But you know, like I'm not against it.
Speaker: I won't ever turn it down and give it to me, but you know, a little, little booty play. I'm not sticking my tongue in it. I'm not sticking my nose in it, but I'll play with it. I'll stick my cock. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. But that's more of a special occasion kind of thing. Cause I'm, I don't know from experience and that just seems like it would hurt. I've gotten yelled at since the first time we'd done it when I don't do it. And I was like, but you said you don't like it.
Speaker: Every once in a while, every once in a while, I'll get the green light and I'm like, are you sure? Yes. Okay. Summer said, oh, you get sloppy drunk and I do, I do. I am, I am, uh, as we've talked about, uh, apparently I'm really conservative, but when I'm drinking or if I've had some drinks in me, I just do whatever the hell I want. That's why I don't mind my wife going out.
Speaker: because occasionally her friends will convince her to drink. And then she'll come home and she'll be like, stick it in my butt. I'm like, all right, it's gonna be a good night. But I always feel bad because I know she's plastered. I'm like, yeah, I don't know. No, like I said, after the first act of it. No matter how crazy and stupid I have done, stupid shit in my life, I can't take advantage of somebody that's completely hammered.
Speaker: Yeah, well, no, that's. She passes out. I'm done. I'm not playing. I'm not going to play no more. I'll tuck you in and I'll go to sleep on the couch. Mm hmm. I'll go jerk off the bathroom first, but then I'm going to sleep on the couch. But well, that's I don't care about drinks. I carry chloroform just in case.
Speaker: Smells so weird. Would you smell it? You know the thing about chloroform though is and I actually read this online somebody was talking about Somebody did an article where there somebody said that joke smells like chloroform that joke Apparently takes chloroform like eight minutes to actually kick in
Speaker: I don't know. You want to try? You want to? No, I'm good. You want to experiment? Saturday night, Jeff. That kind of kills those fucking videos that I've seen. I'm like, oh. Oh, my birthday present is, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. My birthday present is anal. On me. OK. OK. She clarified that. She said, on me, not you. I was like, wait a minute. She was going to be like, surprise, but thanks. I'm like, whoa.
Speaker: I don't think I've ever been that drunk. Well, I'm like, yes, take my ass. Well, first of all, first and foremost, I don't want any. OK, first of all, that's an exit only. Plus, I don't want anybody near that because I know the demons that I exercise out of that. I'm like, don't get close to it. Don't don't don't do that.
Speaker: Surprised you get as close to it when you suck my cock. I'm glad you clarified that it was her, not me. I wouldn't have never yet. Trust me. Surprise! Oh yeah, surprise. I just, surprise. Not only did you get throw punch, you got shitted on.
Speaker: Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Yeah. It was this **** captain skinny jeans. She said she has gotten up during sex and walked out because a guy asked her to peg him. Oh, game over. Yeah, no.
Speaker: I trust me, that's never going to be an issue. I don't want nothing anywhere ever. I don't want your finger. I don't want your tongue. I don't want nothing near my booty hole. I will confess, I had a chick. I used to fork a chick every once in a while. She licked my asshole. It was fucking awesome. But I was like, don't kiss me until you brush your teeth.
Speaker: Oh, you guys didn't even have sex. Well, you just said you got up and you've gotten up during sex. Oh, we didn't even have sex. It was real. It was oral. Oh, you were just doing oral sex and he was doing oral sex and he was like, hey, by the way, I got this fucking giant black don't know. Shut up my ass.
Speaker: Yeah. Shove it up my ass while I eat you out. What the fuck? That's not a fun game changer. Well, I had a I used to data check before I met my wife that the first time I picked her up at the bar and we were on our way home. So we're driving in our car and she says, Oh, just better be good because the last guy I took home, he was he was about
Speaker: five minutes into eating my pussy and I kicked him out of the house. So I was like, oh, don't worry. I got this. I dated her for 10, for like eight years. So I did a good job. Yeah. Yeah. You don't ever have to worry about that. If you even, if there was, if there was a degree in going down, I would have a doctorate. Yeah. Oh my God.
Speaker: How do you how do you as as a guy who enjoys being fucked? How do you even bring that up? I don't know what you know what on the subject of Thursday, dude. Yes.
Speaker: My older brother is very, very, very, very, very gay. And my other older brother is straight like I am. When I lived in Britain with my brother, my straight brother, we both worked at the same company. I moved down there while I worked there because it was a third shift. One day we, my brother Jim and I had the time off and we were over at my other brother's house helping him hang something.
Speaker: I can't use a hammer and uh we we started drinking. We were talking about. Yes, I am. Yeah, I'm ready. And my my brother said in the straightest face, he says, I kind of like catching and wait a minute. You're a gay brother or you're a straight brother? My gay brother. My gay brother. My gay brother was like, I like, I like receiving better than
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. He's like, I'm the catcher. And I was like, really? And the next thing out of my other brother's mouth was like, what's that like? Because damn. Because what was really fucked up was my my gay brother was dating this giant black dude at the time. And I was like, I feel for you. Because I've seen those videos, too, where the chick goes out with this giant black dude who's got an arm in his pants. Yeah.
Speaker: He's like, it's awesome. I'm like, oh, let's make a word for it. Right there. Please sit upon my face. Yes. I'm totally down for, I'm totally down for anytime I can go down on a chick. Anytime. Yeah. Which is why I keep my little ass home because if any chick walking down the street is like, I want you, I want to sit on your face. I'm like, let's do this. Wow.
Speaker: not so much anymore. But when I was single, you know, I'd go to the bar and you get some chick that's about halfway hammered. She's like, I want to fuck your brains out. Why are we still here? Yeah. Why are we? Why are we still talking?
Speaker: the greatest part about being in a vacation destination is these chicks like, I'm going to go down. He cheated on me. I'm going to go down to Cancun and fuck everything I can. And I'm like, I'm what you can. Hey, I will help you get revenge. You got one of those stickers right here. You got one of those stickers on that says, hello, my name is you can. Yeah.
Speaker: I'm literally what's your name? My name's revenge. Revenge on the guy that cheated on you. Let's go. Oh, my goodness. Some of you. You ain't right. But I think it would be interesting to get the full on experience of somebody. You'd be what? Interesting to what? A female telling us our their experience.
Speaker: My neighbor's outside walking. I really do too. Summer said you may wake up the next morning and run across the border. Yeah, that's the best one. Well, the best part about being in the vacation destination, I'm not going to run into this chick again. No. I have another question for you. When it comes to you finishing,
Speaker: Where do you do it? When it's when it's oral. When I do it. Where do you finish? In her. Yeah. Yeah. See, I can't I cannot. Summer said hashtag come dumpster. I cannot come on my wife's face. I can't do it. No, no, I don't have a choice. It feels like that feels like a dickhead move.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't have a choice. I mean, like literally, literally for the first time she came up like the very first time she ever came up here. She made it very clear that she is a Dicer Dyson vacuum cleaner and it's she's taken all of it. Okay, that just makes my life that much fucking easier. In your mouth, wherever, wherever, wherever my dick is at that
Speaker: Yeah, wherever my dick is at that point in time, okay, I'm good. And I'm gonna be like, whoa, stop, jerk, I'll walk your belly. Yeah, I've been with chicks of like, I want you to come on my face. I'm like, no, I'm not that guy. Cuz I feel like a douchebag. I'm like, wow, I feel like an ass. She's like, I love it. Don't move, I'll get you a towel. Here's the towel, you dirty whore. Clean up and leave.
Speaker: leave when you're done. See, I've never been that guy either where I'm like, okay, I'm done. I'm leaving. I've never been that guy. I'm like, I must at least stay the night. I've only well, I've never left, but I'm only in a whole my vast experiences.
Speaker: Summer said do you know how bad it burns if you get it in your eyes? I have no idea Jeff might know more than I do but I've only I've only done that one time Where I got done it was like I Picked up this one chicken at Daddy Rock and I was hanging out with some friends that were in town and we went and
Speaker: to their hotel room, and it was a local chick. I haven't seen her since that guy. But we're out on the balcony just her night, and she's giving me a hit. And of course, it got to that point, and I finished in her mouth. And then she tried to snowball me. I almost thought it was a balcony. Oh, did you throw a puncture and throw her off the balcony? Oh, man. That was the first time I'm like, OK, it's time for you to go. Yeah. Summer said I left working. First and only time I was like, OK, it's time for you to go.
Speaker: The server said I left work and told him I had pink eye. Like I said, not that I'm the most experienced guy, but I've only done that once where when it was all said and done, I was like, all right, you got to leave.
Speaker: Just to clarify, I had Seggy before work and went to work straight. She had sex before work and went to work straight afterwards. So, okay. Fair enough. And you apparently were with a douchebag who felt the need to disrespect you and nut in your face.
Speaker: Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's a disrespect. Yeah, that's how I feel. I feel like I'm disrespecting you. I am. It's called the Madonna complex. It's a Madonna complex. I mean, if I'm with someone. Madonna complex. Yeah. Madonna on the rocks. It's it's it's the Madonna complex is why why you and I cannot blast on somebody's face. I'm like, there you go. Take it. What the fuck does Madonna have to do about it? Not Madonna singer.
Speaker: Oh, I'm thinking of Madonna. I'm like, what is she singing? She's singing that like a prayer song and then you feel bad because you just know Madonna on the rocks is a painting by da Vinci and it's it's it's a
Speaker: I believe it's a virgin girl on the on on rocks by seashore. So wait a minute. What the hell? What the hell did summer lol cat captain skinny pants that I would never stay the night after sex. I would leave chapstick in a hair tie this dude. I don't know how dudes wear skinny pants.
Speaker: I can't do it. And then I felt offended because one of summer's, because then I felt offended one time because one of summer's friends told me that, that I looked like the type of guy that would wear a flannel and skinny pants. And I was like, I had to punch you in the face right now. I have no problem with a flannel, but I cannot wear skinny jeans. Yeah. I'll wear a flannel all day long. But like I said, I have on now and there's still, I got like,
Speaker: three inches extra space in my leg. As I said, probably the quote unquote skinny pants, skinny pants I own on my Cleveland Browns leggings that would probably look way better on summer than they do on me, but still. I don't want that picture.
Speaker: But no, like I said, I've only had that experience once where I went out to the bar by myself down here in town. And then my buddy lived right through like three blocks from the bar. And I went to his house after drinking there. Yeah. Like I went to his house after drinking there and.
Speaker: He was like, oh, so so just call. We were going to TJ's, which TJ's is the best place to go to after a night of drinking. It doesn't even matter if you're drinking or sober. TJ's is awesome restaurant. It's open 24 seven. And they got this thing there. It's called a Barnard Buster. B .Y .B. It's basically eggs, potatoes, biscuits, gravy, sausage. It's all thrown on a plate, man. And it's oh, my God.
Speaker: When you're drunk, it's heaven on earth. And we went up there and met his buddy who was with this chick. It was like their first date. And I was drunk. I was like, I'm going to smoke a cigarette. I was like, I'm going to smoke a cigarette.
Speaker: And then she was like, I'm going to go with you. And one thing led to another. And I was like, Donnie, can I get the key to the apartment? And he was like, yeah, I got you. I was like, I'm just going home and I'm tired. Well, Donnie, this dude came back.
Speaker: You're you're going to be on town on the record. Yeah. And she was terrible. Actually, she was actually one of God, it was horrible. And we got done. And I was like, OK, you got to leave because this is not my place. And, you know, don't you don't want chick stay in the night? And the guy that she was on the first date with was out there on the couch with Donny. They were watching TV. I was like, hey, bro, you got to take her home. She's got to.
Speaker: And my buddy, my buddy gets up and as they're walking out the door, he's like, so I guess there's not going to be a second day. This dude, this dude legit still hates me to this day. And I was like, my bad. I didn't, I didn't know what was going on. Like, I didn't know what was going on. I showed up. I'm not sure.
Speaker: Yeah. One thing led to another and in the parking lot of TJ's and I came in and I was donning for the key and my bad dude, like they'll take it personal. Don't be such a fucking douche. I guess I'll bring it. It was like at the end of the day, I took one for the team because she was horrible. I saved you, bro. It's called jumping on the grenade.
Speaker: No, I was not sober. I was not sober. And then Donnie, and then my buddy Donnie actually wound up like dating her friend for a few months. Nice. So then she would show up randomly. She would like show up randomly and I'd be like, I'd rather. At the end of the day, I'd rather stick my dick in a Budweiser bottle.
Speaker: Donnie's like, dude, stop being a dick to her. And I'm like, what do you want me to do? Oh, you think you want to go for seconds, please? No, I actually picked up a chick at Daddy Rock, which is a bar here. It's no longer here, unfortunately. But this chick, her and I are sitting there talking. And I had given her friend a tongue piercing earlier that day, which is how I met her. And she showed up in the bar where I worked.
Speaker: And her and I were talking and she said that she had an inability to come, which I took for a challenge. I was like, challenge accepted. And I literally went down on this chick for over an hour and a half and nothing. It was weird. It was weird. I was pulling all my moves out and I was getting nothing in return.
Speaker: the most boring lay of my life. Like, it would have been better if I, I mean, to the point where I eventually got to the point where she's like, you might as well just fucking finish. I'm like, all right, whatever. Yeah, right. Summer said, well, now you have me and all my personalities. I enjoy every single one of your personalities.
Speaker: because all of them have the same sexual sex drive that you have. Yeah. But yeah, it was it was the weirdest thing ever. I ended up fucking a friend too. Well, I got her off like three times, but I couldn't get her off no matter what I did. It was weird. Yeah. No, that's like it. So that was just
Speaker: I don't know. Like I said, not that I have all these crazy experiences or all these different partners or anything like that, but that was just one of those times where it was just like,
Speaker: This is just not fun. Like, you know, I've, you know, there's, there's one thing when you get that first, that first time you see somebody naked, it's a bit awkward. And then there's there's something like, okay, we're naked. We're having sex, but this is terrible. Yeah. It's just, it's just weird.
Speaker: but I do, I do need to wrap this up. You would easily say what? Well, it's not bright that I'm of people that I've slept with because my first year, love you too. I'd get done at work, go to the bar,
Speaker: pick up chicks, stay at her hotel, and then go to my apartment, shit shower, and shave, and then do it again. Yeah. Because I'm in a vacation town. It's, I mean, being single and going to the bar every night, you could throw a stick in some of these bars and find four chicks. Oh, fuck you. Oh, yeah. You know, so it's not uncommon even for a chud like me to get laid. I got a buddy of mine that this guy is like, really? How ever do you get laid?
Speaker: but he gets laid all the time because it's vacation town. Well, I had friends because he's Mexican and these white chicks coming down. I want to **** a Mexican dude. Yeah. 5 million of them. No, I I had I had a buddy of mine that was like that down in Charleston. Like he was like, I'm professionally single because we lived in Charleston and you know, it was it was like
Speaker: shooting fish in a barrel for him oh yeah well i mean i think that that's i i got bored with it after the first year where i was like i need i need a challenge i'm gonna start going after local girls which is yeah exactly not necessarily my downfall but that's how i ended up married because i got a local girl you know and well the problem with day it went with just quote unquote what i like to call sport fucking
Speaker: Is it gets old really fast? Yeah, well man fast, but it gets old eventually Unless you're just complete douchebag The guys that are that are that start in their 20s being a professional sport fucker and They're in their 50s and still trying to sport fuck. That's just creepy Just fucking weird Yeah, I know a guy down here that literally
Speaker: he's been a sport fucking since the eighties. And I'm like, dude, you're in your sixties. He's like, oh, yeah. At that point, at that point, it's just creepy. Yeah. You're, you're, you're, you're 61 years old and you're, I don't know how, but you're pulling 19 year olds. I said, that's creepy. She's like, he, he, he literally told me, he's like, I like the ones with daddy complexes. I'm like,
Speaker: Well, I mean I think I stopped for I stopped sport fucking tourists in Let's see Oh for 2004 and I I sport fucked for since 2001 down here So three years I'm good, you know
Speaker: I got the memories. I mean, but there isn't a... I've pretty much been around the world. Yeah. You know, there's not a continent I haven't been to without leaving my town. Fair enough. You know, there's that old adage is like, when you're on your deathbed, nobody ever says, I wish I fucked less. You know,
Speaker: Uh, the one regret I don't have, I do have is I never got a black chick. I do. I mean, it's never too late. Yeah. Well, I don't know, but, but I'm very specific when it comes to the black chick, I want to fuck.
Speaker: Okay. I'm saying body type and all that stuff. And yeah, my problem is, is like, I can't go after the American black chicks because they are fucking crazy. I need that's all I need some hood rat. Huh?
Speaker: Oh, no, I'm not. Some summers have had according to her ex -boyfriend. Yeah. But she was dating when she met me. One of the funnest is the Indian, the British Indian girls. Holy crap. Those kids are crazy. They're down. They're down, dude. And Australian girls, Australian girls are awesome. And of course, Mexican girls are awesome, too.
Speaker: crazy. Oh my god. Does that make you crazy? I have a shirt. I have a shirt here that I'm gonna actually have it remade because it's getting old and it's got holes in it stuff. It says I'm crazy. She's crazy. I'm nuts. She's crazy. She's crazy. I'm
Speaker: I'm stupid. Together we're dangerous.
Speaker: Yeah, let's go ahead and wrap up. I may not be a smart man, but I know what love is. I love that fucking movie. That is a great movie. For like six months, I worked at a store in the airport here, right across from a Bubba Gump.
Speaker: two weeks, I'd be like, I need to watch Forrest Gump again. Because they play it on the TV all the time. At my cash register, just kind of tilt my head a little bit. I can see the TV fall. And just to the point where I could hear it, even though the volume's off, I can hear it in my head. I'm like, I know exactly what he's saying right now. That restaurants awesome. That restaurant burger, that barbecue burger. Holy shit.
Speaker: I walk in and I'm like, I know what I want. I don't need a menu. They had really good food. And I used to always get the shrimp appetizer, the fried shrimp appetizer. Well, actually, uh, I was kind of pissed at myself when I went to Hooters the other day. Cause I bought the wings and they changed the recipe of the barbecue sauce. So it wasn't as good.
Speaker: But for the same price that I paid for wings and fries, I could have got the slider platter for half the price. I have not been to the Hooters in years. I went to Hooters once, maybe twice when I lived in Charleston.
Speaker: right? And before that, when I was back home, man, we used to go to Hooters all the fucking time. Like, I didn't go there because of the women. I went there because Hooters had the closest thing. What's up? The food is awesome. Hooters. Well, I went there. I went there specifically because Hooters had the closest thing to the closest thing to an original or an OG Philly cheese steak that you can get outside of Philly. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, there was a guy from Philly here. He had a Philly cheesesteak restaurant for like five years. And then unfortunately he did pass away. And then the new owner changed the recipe and all that stuff. So I stopped going. So they went out of business, but that place was awesome. He was actually from Philly. His wife was from Philly. When he died, his wife sold the business to somebody else, but, but oh my gosh, I would go daily on my way into work. Oh, so that sucks.
Speaker: Yeah, it was terrible. But what did I do? Well, down here at Hooters here, they have if you if you get it to go on Thursdays, they have two for one wings to go. Or or you can go and have all you can eat wings for, I think, 20 bucks. On Thursdays. Hmm. And
Speaker: I go in with the kids and my wife and I'm like, you guys about to go out of business because we will literally get down on this for them wangs for all you can eat wings. And then, of course, after about my third plate of 10 wings, I'm like, bring me the spicy ones. And then I pay for it. I pay for it big time because it burns going in and burns coming out. Jesus.
Speaker: Oh, absolutely. That day I sat there and ate those rajas. I paid for it the next day. I always do. Oh, I knew you were going to. I always do, but I always forget because I love the taste of spicy food. Yeah. Yeah. No, I knew you was going to. Oh, but yeah. So let's go ahead and let's go ahead and close this out because like I said, I'm going to get some rest. I took my medicine tonight. I got me some Budweiser.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't think that was doctor approved. Yeah, I don't know, man. I would imagine tomorrow's gonna. Yeah, Dr. Dr. Glick prescribed six pack of Budweiser for dinner. My wife got sick and she's on these antibiotics. She's got pills. She's got to take every eight hours. Another pill. She's got to take every 12 hours for three days. And then she just got her last injection.
Speaker: right before she went out because it has to be done at like nine o 'clock or something like that but she's gonna be out way later than that so we just did it early. Yeah but uh no like I said you know I still got uh I got a couple stories saved for Saturday. I got some juicy stories saved for Saturday. That's a good one.
Speaker: And Lord of the Linnows I'm going to find between now and then. Pops will be back Saturday with the top 10. Hopefully you'll have his headset on. We can hear him a little bit better. Jeff will be back with another horrible TV or movie review. I'm telling you, dude, it's a good game. It's worth it. I don't know, man. Maybe. I'm telling you, it's seriously trending like you read about.
Speaker: But I guarantee you, you'd check it. It's probably on the top 10. I'll check it out after I get it all over fucking TikTok. I'll check it out after I finished deadwood. Yeah. When you get to the plot twist at the end, you're going to fucking call me, bro. Damn, that was fucking cool.
Speaker: I called that movie. I called that shit at the first episode. The I'm telling you, it looks like the second, the last game is fucking dope as shit. It looks a lot. It looks a lot like Running Man, that Schwarzenegger movie. Yeah, but I mean, uh, you really feel for this guy, the main character. Yeah.
Speaker: you you you know you're invested in it and and the crazy thing is like I said they completely set it up for a second season I don't know if they're gonna do it but I'm hoping they will if they do a second season it's gonna be dope as shit yeah we'll see what happens in the meantime check out Ragnarok yeah I'm gonna work on it it's a slow burn but it's totally worth it I was looking at it last night well I'm still watching like
Speaker: Nine different shows. Mm hmm. Like I said, right. Ragnarok's a slow. It's a slow burn, but it's worth it. All right. I'll take it off. Yeah. I don't know. Oh. I'm going to wrap her up. Grab her up. That's a wrap, folks.
Speaker: So appreciate you guys listening. Appreciate you guys hanging out in the shatters box tonight. Uh, who would have thought that a news article would take us down the road. It took us. Got a couple more juicy ones for you guys coming up Saturday. Yeah. Right. Uh, plus we got top 10 with pops coming up Saturday. Jeff will have a new show and or a movie to, uh, spoil Saturday and I'll have more what the fuck news and
Speaker: Lord knows what else the fuck will come up because outside of what the fuck news and the pot, the top 10 and, and, and, uh, movies, we usually sprawl off.
Speaker: just review is it's all random and unscripted and un uh un uh unedited yeah that's the word i was looking for thanks both but uh thank you guys for hanging out thank you guys for listening to the extended version the the i'm sorry i sound like shit those of you guys listening to us on the replay i am sick as hell uh but you know i thought i was only going to do two hours tonight and wound up doing four hours but uh
Speaker: Check us out again Saturday night. We'll be live on HAPS, Facebook, YouTube, and Twitch at 8 p .m. Saturday. While you're at it, go ahead and check us out on social media, on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, YouTube, Twitch, HAPS TV, all at Nonsense School Nonsense. And if you've caught any of our lives, or if a friend of yours has shared, or somebody's told you, hey, check out Nonsense School Nonsense, and you wanna check out every episode,
Speaker: go ahead and give us a listen on Anchor, Spotify, Google Play, Apple Podcasts. Basically anywhere you get your podcast jollies, go give us a like and go give us a thumb in. Go give us a pounding. After you give us a thumb in, give us a pounding. And if you do want to email us, as we've talked about, we've had one guest on the show so far, so far, so far.
Speaker: Uh, Rocky, Rockley. Yeah. Rockley for medium combat. We do have Rob Durham comedy coming up here on the 13th of October. So if you'd like to come on the show, hit us up on an email at, uh, what's that email, Jeff? Yeah. Or if you want to sponsor this dumpster fire or train wreck that we call a podcast, let us know. Much love guys. Thanks for hanging out with us. We are.
Speaker: How to hear? Deuces. Jeff, you might want to hang out for this. Oh, you got my song. BlacktopMojo. Follow them on social media at BlacktopMojo. Go give them a like. Go give them a listen. Let them know. Nonsense. Go nonsense. Sencha. Basically, so cat and Matt scratch their heads and go, what the fuck? Who? Fuck is this nonsensical nonsense? They sound like six people.
Speaker: He's the blade above the head And I'll begin to reach He's dead Oh, the maw's all in the sky Take this back and find I wanna live forever No, the spirit in the earth Give me all your blood Make me a guideline
Speaker: you
Speaker: Sir, can I help you? Do you have any weapons of any kind? Anything to defend yourself? Sir, this is a Speedy Mart. We have hot dogs too for a dollar. I just put them on the roller yesterday. They're pretty good.
Speaker: no man like something sharp something like i can stab defend myself with i've got some sharp titter combos over there it's kind of like a rich cracker pregnant with a cheese baby all right well let me just take one of these lighters and i'm gonna borrow your bug spray and can i borrow your bathroom key as well uh yeah bathroom key all right i got your bathroom key right
Speaker: There make sure you bring it back and that'll be 1362 and I'm gonna have to have exact same so we're in a coin shortage at the moment Whatever man, okay, that's I'm sorry I
Speaker: I wanna live forever Now, believe in the earth Give me another Make me a god like you
Speaker: Oh shit, Chuck. Oh shit, Chuck?
Speaker: Take this back, it's fine I want to live forever And I'll steal it in the end Give me whatever, make me a timeline
