Transcript
Speaker: Where were you when the world stopped turning on that September day? Were you in the yard with your wife and children working on some stage in L .A.? Did you stand there in shock at the sight of that black smoke rising against that blue sky?
Speaker: Did you shout out in anger and fear for your neighbor? Or did you just sit down and cry? Did you weep for the children who lost their dear loved ones and pray for the ones who don't know? Did you rejoice for the people who walked from the rubble and sobbed for the ones left below?
Speaker: Did you burst out with pride with the red, white, and blue? And the heroes who died just doing what they do? Did you look up to heaven for some kind of answer? And look at yourself and what really matters? I'm just a singer of simple songs I'm not a real political man
Speaker: I watched CNN, but I'm not sure I can tell you The difference in Iraq and Iran But I know Jesus and I talked to God And I remember this from when I was young Faith, hope, and love are some good things He gave us And the greatest is love
Speaker: Wherever you went, the world stopped turning On that September day Teaching a class full of innocent children For driving down some cold interstate Did you feel guilty cause you're a survivor In a crowded room, did you feel alone
Speaker: Did you call up your mother and tell her you loved her? Did you dust off that Bible it holds? Did you open your eyes and hope it never happened? Close your eyes and not go to sleep? Did you notice the sunset, first time in ages? Speak to some stranger on the street? Did you lay down at night?
Speaker: Think of tomorrow, go out and buy you a gun Did you turn off that violent whole movie you're watching And turn on all of them Siri runs? Did you go to a church and hold hands with some strangers? Stand in line and give your own glove Did you just stay home and cling tight to your family? Thank God you had somebody to love
Speaker: of simple songs I'm not a real political man I watch CNN, but I'm not sure I can tell you The difference in Iraq and Iran But I know Jesus and I've talked to God And I remember this from when I was young Faith, hope, and love are some good things He gave us
Speaker: And the greatest is love I'm just a singer of simple songs I'm not a real political man I watch CNN but I'm not sure I can tell you The difference in our rockin' and our rent But I know Jesus and I talk to God And I remember this from when I was young
Speaker: Fake hope and love are some good things He gave us And the greatest is love And the greatest is love And the greatest is love Where were you when the world stopped turning On that September day?
Speaker: what's going on everybody welcome to nonsense school nonsense hanging out with you all tonight as always is yours truly click and the little guy my little buddy one and only Jeffrey Minehock today is uh
Speaker: 20 years 20 years the 20th anniversary of 9 -11 obviously one of the One of the most tragic days in American history on our soils. I guess you could say so I wanted to do a little something tonight So I've got a couple songs in the old Playlists, I don't worry. Who are we but it's the least we can do unfortunately
Speaker: many innocent men and women were lost, not only in the towers on the plains, but then our very first responders that more, most of us would run away from that. They ran into it. They ran towards it. I can read about this. What? Yeah, go ahead.
Speaker: Don't want to keep the whole show down. I do want to talk a few minutes about 9 -11 because I'm curious. I know where I was. Where were you, sir? That's what I was going to say. I'm curious to know where you were about 9 -11. Do you want to go first? I'll do a second. Because I'm curious where you were. I mean, I will first. I don't care.
Speaker: I mean, yeah, actually, I was, uh, I mean, I was actually, yeah. Oh yeah. Cam. Uh, what's going on, Lee? What's going on, Ali? What's going on, Cam? Uh, welcome to the cheddars box guys. No, actually that day I was, um, I was working for my uncle. We were doing, I did excavating back then.
Speaker: And I was actually, we were on a job that was literally right around the corner from my house, just up the road a little ways. We were installing a subject system for the Amish at one of their wood shops where they mass produced trusses and this and the other thing.
Speaker: and uh my uncle was on the excavator and me and my buddy Frankie guy grew up with we were down in the trenches so to say yeah but uh we we my uncle had the radio on on his excavator and we all kind of stopped because they came across the radio and said that a plane just flew into the world trade center with the first tower
Speaker: and we all kind of stopped and was like, what the fuck kind of dumbass flies are playing into, you know, how do you miss that song bitch? Because at that time we're all thinking like a, yeah, go ahead. We're thinking like a, like a Cessna or a single engine plane or, you know, something like that. We're not thinking of a full blown passenger airliner. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, the funny thing is, to go off what you're saying, the same thing happened to me. I was literally, at the time, I was working third shift at step two. They make the plastic toys for kids and shit, right? Yeah, exactly. And I'd gotten home that day, and being in third shift, I'd get home at like five o 'clock in the morning, six o 'clock, something like that. And I was lying in bed waiting to fall asleep.
Speaker: And I had a routine that I would listen to Howard Stern until I passed out. Because it was that time in my life where I had to listen to Howard Stern. And he was talking about it and he's like, some idiot flew into the plane, flew into the tower and I was like, wait, what? And at first I thought he was joking. And my dad had gotten up, he had had his coffee and he was watching some show. And I went out in the living room and I said, we gotta turn on the fucking news.
Speaker: and we turned on the news just as the second plane was hitting like we saw the second plane hit and we were just like oh shit this is for real but yeah continue on yeah exactly well that's like i said that's pretty much how we were the same way we stopped what we were doing and for our second you know for a minute we were kind of joking like you know
Speaker: You know, 180 foot building.
Speaker: How do you miss that shit? And then we were kind of sitting there talking about it. Yeah. We were kind of standing there talking about it. And, you know, a few minutes later when the second plane hit and the radio announcer came across and he was like, it was one of those days where I think the FCC kind of went out the window because the radio announcer was like, holy shit. A second plane just hit the tower.
Speaker: And at that moment, you know, we just stopped everything we were doing because, you know, we knew some shit. I couldn't tell you which TV channel we turned to because we had that weird, funky satellite that, you know, it was like satellite 14A and 24 channels on that satellite. Then you switch another satellite. Real pain in the ass. So we just found the fastest news channel we could find and turned it on.
Speaker: And it was obviously, you know, an American channel or whatever, but we were like, you know, I think I'm pretty sure the, the person on there was like, what the shit? Yeah. And, and, you know, the FCC was like, Hey, we did it. Go for it. Spill them. You know, because it was, it was a huge shock. And for the next like eight hours, my dad and I were glued to the TV. Just.
Speaker: We couldn't turn it off. What's going to happen next? The next thing you know, there's a plane hitting the Pentagon. And you're like, what the hell? Yeah, exactly. You know? But. Well, I don't think we I don't I don't think we did anything else the rest of the day. No. We just kind of wrapped up in. Yeah. I don't remember. My dad was like, hey,
Speaker: My dad asked me to drive him to the bank because his truck was in the shop or something. And we were like, he's like, run me to the bank real quick. We needed to deposit his check or something. And we got there and the bank was closed. And we were like, what the hell? You know, it was like a Wednesday or something. I don't remember what exactly day. But we got there. It was a normal banking hours. And they were closed. And they're like, we're closed because of what's happening in New York. We're like, yeah, we get it. We're going home. And we went back home and started watching TV again. You know?
Speaker: Uh, it was a horrible, horrible day for anybody that remembers it. And the people that don't remember it are, you know, I don't know. I don't know how to say it, but the people that don't remember it or have forgotten it. Shame on you. You know, I don't think, I don't think, uh, I don't think anybody's ever forgotten it. Those of us that were alive back then.
Speaker: Um, I think, I think one of the, I'm sure like five year olds at the time didn't, couldn't care. I think, um, I think one of the biggest things. Oh, no. Um,
Speaker: I think one of the biggest things is that there's younger generations that really don't know much about it. How disrespectful. That they can be by saying it was just nothing. I mean, I will remember being in shock for like two days, just like, I can't believe that what I just saw. You know, this is before YouTube and before Facebook. I mean, you know what I mean? There was no real social media.
Speaker: I don't think Myspace was out. I know I didn't have anything. I had my cell phone I had at the time, I believe, was a Nextel. And it was the old Nextel brick. Yeah. Well, I had the Sprint PCS flip phone. I thought it was the coolest thing ever. But yeah.
Speaker: I mean, literally, there was no texting back then. I don't think I'd text until I got a better phone, like, until I moved here. You know what I mean? Yeah, but... Oh, yeah, it was dark times. It's the only way to say it for me, for me anyways.
Speaker: everybody in their brother was just like did you see and and if you didn't see you were like what have you been on a rock yeah i don't know but i don't know about i don't know about dark times for me it was more just just a shock and all because you know you you talk to some of the older people or if you at that time if you know people that may or may not have still been alive uh
Speaker: or were alive when Pearl Harbor hit or Pearl Harbor happened? I was actually going to say the same thing. My grandfather, he's passed since then. Since then.
Speaker: We were talking about 9 -11. This was like six months later or something, but he was like, we were talking about 9 -11 and the 9 -11 commission had just come out. So it may have been nine months or something, but he was like this, he was talking that Pearl Harbor was, it was the same feeling. He was just like, wait, what happened? You were just in shock and like, I can't believe this happened on American soil. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: So, but yeah, like I was saying, you know, this younger generation that wants to talk trash and make jokes and make light of it, I think that's one of the most aggravating things because I don't ever remember a time where we as kids, you know, we obviously were not alive. We're not scared. I mean, not scared, but like, what could happen next kind of thing?
Speaker: Yeah, you know, yeah, not so much scared, but I'm saying like, I don't, I don't ever remember a time where we made light of Pearl Harbor or it was a, you know, it was like, like I was live on TikTok yesterday and I kind of got into it with this stupid ass kid. Uh, because his, his, uh, TikTok name was blaze it, blaze it like the twin towers. What a douche. And I was like, you're either incredibly ignorant or just a giant douche bag. And he's like, Oh, well, blah, blah, blah. You know, started like.
Speaker: You're clearly a fucking child and you weren't around. You don't know how that affected us or affected people back then. But at the same time, like I said, I don't think I don't ever know a time or know of anybody that ever made light of Pearl Harbor. Yeah, exactly. I don't think I've ever made light of Pearl Harbor, especially after the movie. I made light of the movie because I'll make fun of Ben Affleck as much as I love his movies. I'll make fun of him all day long.
Speaker: But I will say, yeah, exactly. Ben Affleck's awesome. He's got a new movie on Netflix that looks pretty good called The Accountant. But I will say this much. It's good. I saw it. As far as all the bullshit that's going on in the world today and all the nonsense and this craziness, a lot of people should, a lot of people, and granted, most of the craziness and bullshit is brought on by the younger generation because they're entitled and they think that they deserve shit, just hand it to them.
Speaker: and their social warriors. They need to step back and take a look at how Americans should act and should be. If anybody's got the time, it's not the greatest movie ever, but Nick Cage did a World Trade Center movie. It's on Netflix. It's heartbreaking, dude. And it's literally about two firemen trapped in the World Trade Center, not even in the main building.
Speaker: But oh, it's heartbreaking. And there was one of the 30 people pulled out alive. 30. And that's the thing. I mean, obviously, this weekend with football being back and what this weekend is, college football in the week two, they've been doing a lot of things and showing a lot of footage of just how much
Speaker: Sports affect and mean to people and all the tributes that you know, like the first New York Giants football game after the 9 -11 and you know and Like I said, you know all these jackasses that want to fight with people about Democrat Republican or Whatever it is 20 years ago There was no
Speaker: I mean, nobody was thinking Democrat Republican. Everybody was thinking, what the fuck? Well, there was no Democrat. There was no Republican. Are you OK? Did you lose anybody? You know, you were generally concerned for your quote unquote neighbor's well -being. Yeah, exactly. There was no black. There was no white. In a song that we just listened to, did you talk to a stranger, did you talk to a neighbor? I have about it. You know, that not necessarily that day, but in the days after.
Speaker: You know? And to this day, I still, because I'm a conspiracy nut, watch everything I can about 9 -11. But that's a whole notherball game right now.
Speaker: But like I said, I don't ever wish for another tragedy or anything like that ever again. But I wish we as a people could take a look back and see. And it wasn't just that day. It was for a long time after that. It was like months that people were just nice to each other. It was the nicest couple of months because everybody was concerned about everybody else.
Speaker: We were we were Americans again, and now we're sort of goddamn divided and separated it It's ridiculous But uh That's my that's my little political folks that's Chris Why can't we all just get along
Speaker: Just fucking be nice to each other. The guy who will fight a grizzly bear and a kangaroo at the same time will come and punch you in the throat. How's that sound? There you go. I'll be right behind him going, hit him again. Get him off now. Wait, he's coming after me. Chris, get him. No, I'm not going to hit him. Chris is doing that. Just a witness, folks.
Speaker: I'm here for, I'm just recording it. I'm here for bread. I still say one of the darkest days of my life. If that, obviously it was a dark day. It was a dark day for everyone. It was a slap in the face. It was a legitimate for the first time in our generation.
Speaker: were, you know, it was a legitimate slap in the face that, you know, kind of caught us off guard and blindsided us a little bit. Not a little bit, but completely blindsided us. I'm pretty sure a lot of people went and signed up for the military that day or the next couple of days.
Speaker: Oh, absolutely. Absolutely. A lot of people did. I mean, not only that, but a lot of people signed up to go help clean up to go up there. You know, guys that were equipment operators or construction guys or, um, I think my, I think I'm not a hundred percent sure, but I think guys from like Iowa showing up with their fire truck. Yeah. Um, not a hundred percent sure, but I think my uncle signed up, like signed, signed the company up to where we could have gone and help with the cleanup if need be. Right.
Speaker: And so when we had, we had equipment, we had the trucks, we had dumped whatever the case may be. Um, but, uh, I had, I had a friend of mine that was there, um, during the cleanup and, uh, he, he still shook by it. He was part of the cleanup effort. He was, he was military. Um, but he, he still shook by it to this day. I mean, it's not just concrete and dust. You're cleaning up, you know, I mean, you're cleaning up.
Speaker: things people work for for their entire entire life. I mean, to be to be in that tower, working in that tower, that was a sense of pride, you know? Oh, absolutely. I work in the World Trade Center. Granted, I'm just a copy, which means I'm a gopher, but I work in the World Trade Center. Yeah. I'm a janitor, whatever. It doesn't matter. But I mean,
Speaker: those buildings were iconic. Oh, absolutely. They were. The only joke I remember about 9 -11 was that the new tower is going to be a big middle finger pointed towards the east. That's a healthy clean joke, so to speak. In good taste, so to speak. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: but let's get on to more, let's get on to the dick and fart jokes because we're bringing everybody down, I'm sure.
Speaker: They blocked our video. I don't know. I don't know if our Facebook feed is still up. Somebody somebody help us. Tell us if our if our Facebook feed is still up. Facebook cancel us. Do we just get Kevin Holly for for trying to play a nine eleven song because we didn't have the the rights. Damn you Zuckerberg.
Speaker: They might've just blocked that song. Yeah, probably. Which I guess I'll find out when I pull the audio. Which ones I have to do. It might've been muted on Facebook. They're on YouTube. Well, Facebook meets our audio every week. Every episode. Every episode. Even though I have permission from the band themselves to use Black Top Mojo's music and I tell them that
Speaker: Every episode, they still mute it, but it doesn't mess up the audio. So when I pull the audio, it's still all good, so I don't have to do anything with it.
Speaker: But I guess we'll find out what happens when I play the next two songs. Maybe I'll just play one song. Let's not push fate, so to speak. Facebook's going to slap us right in the tip of our Peters. Yeah. Old Zuckerberg, God forbid, he actually... Let's not get into that. I don't want to fuck around and get sucked.
Speaker: Sucked off. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good way. Not in a good
Speaker: I'm always telling dad, dude. Since I was being political for a minute, let's see if I can get this right without completely fucking it up. Because it made me, it made me laugh. It made me laugh. It made me laugh out loud. So yes, I was LMA or was it LMAOA or whatever LMOA. Well, there's also that and there's, uh, R
Speaker: Oh, she was rolling on the floor, rolling on the floor, laughing my ass off or something like that. Yes. I just stick with lol. I mean, haha.
Speaker: I saw somebody put on TikTok, they said, when I say hee hee, it's not me laughing, it's actually me being sarcastic going, hee hee, that's funny. I was trying to do a play on that and it just came off bad.
Speaker: yeah nice so because i don't tell jokes i'm not really the joke guy but i heard this one and it made me laugh actually i read it but uh because i i can read i'm like my co -host i do my best so i sound out the words hip hip hip
Speaker: Hip, hip -hop, hip -hop anonymous? Damn you, you give him the easy ones. Great. Absolutely. So three doctors walk in a bar, order up shots of tequila. The fourth one ducked. Oh, sorry, go ahead. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, exactly. First doctor.
Speaker: First doctor slams back his shot at tequila, slams it on the bar. He said, I had a farmer come in with an arm injury, damn near ripped his arm off. I put him on my operating table, sewed him up within six hours. Now he's a professional baseball player. Second doctor takes his shot, slams his shot glass down on the bar. He said, I had a grocery store owner.
Speaker: Get into an accident, rip his leg off. Throwing him on my operating table. Four hours later, sewed him up, fixed his leg, now he's a marathon runner. Third doctor takes his tequila, takes the shot, slams it down on the bar and said, I was driving along one night. His car in front of me swerves around, hits a tree and the driver flies out into a cow pasture. Smashes his head, brains are everywhere, so I jump out and grab my doctor's bag.
Speaker: go out there and I'm scooping up his brains and horse shit and everything else. Taking him on the operating table. Two hours later, I got him all fixed up. And now he's our president.
Speaker: Nice. I thought you were going to say the third doctor at the end of two people. I figured you did enjoy that one. I was going to send it to you but then I was like, yeah, you can't read. I'll just tell it to you. That's good. I'm going to totally retell that one better.
Speaker: Emphasis you have to emphasize I'm not a fucking stand -up comedian. Do I do I look like? Just because I'm stealing jokes. I don't mean I'm George Vincia That was a shot I like that shot that's a good shot. Yeah, I
Speaker: I think it's his name. Is it George Monsieur or George Lopez? No, it's... it's... it's... Mens... Mensa. It's Mensa. I know... I know who you're talking about. I just can't remember his first name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last name. I can't remember his last
Speaker: She loves that dude. Oh, he's funny. Oh my god. My wife. Yeah, she loves some fluffy dude. Fluffy's fucking hilarious, dude. Oh my god. The funniest things when he tells that story about him driving in that Hummer and getting pulled over by a cop and playing bad boys. Holy shit. You know how hard it is. You know how hard it is to give two. You know how hard it is to give two sluts a ticket while listening to cops.
Speaker: As we, as we, uh, as, as you and I talked to the pre -show Wednesday, we didn't really talk much tonight. We didn't really talk much all this week, but I blame that on, uh, I blame that on my work schedule this week. Oh my goodness. One arm man in a butt kick contest. One legged man. Yeah, one legged man. I don't, I don't think a one arm man is going to be too affected by an ass kicking contest. Well, I was going to say one arm man in a paper hanging contest, but that doesn't make sense.
Speaker: So, um...
Speaker: don't make a whole lot of sense. It's actually a one -armed man on a paper hanging factory. I was going to say maybe like a one -armed man on a monkey bar race. I got the butt kicking contest from Dolly Parton. Yeah, a one -armed man in a nice motor race. My whole family loves the movie Steel Magnolias. Have you seen this movie?
Speaker: Is that the one? Is that, is that the one where the lady, yeah. Where the lady yells at somebody for getting in her refrigerator.
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. Why is there beer in my refrigerator? What is this in my refrigerator? What is this in my refrigerator? And he goes, bear. And she jumps it up. And he's like, oh no, God damn it. She's pouring it out. And she's like, I think we should pray. And he goes, oh, I'd rather eat dirt. But the funniest line in that whole movie, the funniest line in that whole movie is, um,
Speaker: At one point, Dolly Parton's talking about that same guy because his wife became extremely religious and all this stuff. Dolly Parton says he doesn't know whether to wind his butt or scratch his watch. You know what I'm saying? But that movie, I kid you not, my mother, my father,
Speaker: one of my brothers, myself, and both of my sisters can quote that movie all day long. To the point where when my sister got married, the guy from Top Gun, what's his name? He plays the main instructor. No, not the main instructor. Tom Scarritt. Tom Scarritt plays Julie Roberts. Tom Scarritt plays Julie Roberts dead in that movie.
Speaker: And before the wedding reception, he shoots an arrow full of fireworks to scare away some birds, right?
Speaker: And it makes his hearing go out. So he can't hear himself because when a loud noise goes off, your hearing goes down. And the priest says, who gives away this bride? And Julie Roberts bumps him to get his attention. He screams out, his mother and I knew real loud. So when my sister got married, we all told my dad, you got to do it.
Speaker: He's like, her mother and I do. And you can literally hear like nine of us go, ah. And I was like, what the fuck? 200 people turn around. What the hell? Nine of us in a row. This is bullshit. Fuck this way. I don't even want to be here anymore. It was funny as hell. But that movie, there's a, there's a actually a new version of that movie with Queen Latifah. It's all black cast. It's not as good, but the original Dolly Parton hilarious.
Speaker: Yeah, I, I've already, I've already been told I'm going to get in trouble if when the preacher, cause I told the summer, I said, you know what, the preacher asked if, uh, if, if I do, I'm going to turn to all my grooms when I'm my best man and we're going to huddle up. She said there are way your options. She's like, you better fucking not just just huddle up. Yeah. Just sit there for a second. Look back at her. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. Stop and look back at her in the huddle. Stop and look back at her in the huddle. Go back to the huddle. I guess since we're all here. Might as well. I got clean clothes on. Okay. Yeah. Better double check with her. Make sure she really wants to get married to me. Now the funniest thing was at my wedding when
Speaker: Like I said, we went to Justice of Peace kind of thing and it's a full ceremony but the guy officiating didn't tell us beforehand. He goes literally middle of the ceremony. Instead of actually reciting some generic vowels, I like to have the couple recite their own vowels right there on the spot. Now my wife does not like to talk in public.
Speaker: So of course I go first and I say my bit and I go off all heartfelt, my wife literally. And I said, if you say me too, because when I asked her to marry me in front of 3000 people, I got up there on stage and I said, everybody, I just want to say I love Tanya and I want to be with her forever. And Tanya, will you marry me? And she came up. Well, he said too. I was like, damn, she said me too. Yeah.
Speaker: Well two things first of all when you when you started when you're like I did by when you were like My little bit. I thought you were gonna say you started it off with bitch No, actually I Super romantic with shit like that, you know, which is why when I posed my wife I didn't front of 3 ,000 people
Speaker: Why were you in front of 3000 people? And why did you, why were you on the stage? Were you just some asshole that was drunk and you were at a concert and ran up on stage and was like, do the microphone. When my wife and I were dating, my wife was very into, we went on a retreat with the church and she's like, do you want to go? And I was like, oh, all right, fine, whatever. And so we go and it's, it was like four hours away.
Speaker: And you know, we had the whole week together. I was like, this is gonna be amazing, you know. And forgetting that it was a religious retreat and I was like, wait, we can't have sex? Oh man, you know. But they had this big dinner and a big stage. So in the middle of dinner, well, just after dinner, we're all sitting around getting ready for the buses to show up and there's 3000 people sitting around. So I was like,
Speaker: And one of the guys next to me, you know, my wife and I had been talking about getting married for a while anyways. And the guy sitting next to me said, you should have to marry her now. On stage. I said, all right, let's go. And he's like, I was kidding. I'm like, no, I'm not. Let's go. And she looked at me. She's like, don't you dare. I said, watch this. And I kind of wanted things. And I was like, excuse me, everybody. But I did it in English, where everybody there spoke Spanish.
Speaker: There might have been three people me so so everybody was just like no I actually had the guy they're doing next to me with another microphone the guy that egged me on to get up there with a with a microphone Translating everything I said Just to embarrass her just a little bit more But a little extra something something for you. Yeah Yeah, but
Speaker: Well, like I said, when we actually got married, the guy officiating, he's like, I like to have them do their own vows. And I said, Tanya, I love you. And I always want to be with you. And I can't imagine being with anybody else, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker: And I went on for like, what, three, four, five minutes, something like that. And my wife went, well, he said, she said, me too. That was her, me too. I was like, no, she was, she was saying, no, she was saying she was me too.
Speaker: and Chris is saying that you were me dude as in like the rape thing from Kevin Spacey and Bill Cosby where everybody's like, he did it to me too. That's fucked up, dude. She was trying to get out and everybody else was like, oh. Everybody else was like, oh, they're so sweet. She thinks she's like, me too. No, that's not what I meant. Oh, shit. It's over. Somebody save me.
Speaker: She says it was a pressure. Yeah, right. It was a shotgun wedding, you know. Oh, well. Oh, well. I think I've been told no funny business at the wedding. So, somewhere if you're listening, when instead of saying, I do, just say me too. Just watch Christmas.
Speaker: Are you guys doing the standard Yeah, I don't I have no idea I haven't been told you Hopefully hopefully I don't write vows because I'm garbage at that shit, but I
Speaker: I've also been told that there will be no and and and that's the thing like I like your boobies and I want to play with them all the time. Yeah. You got nice boobies and you have the sex with me. So, yes, I do.
Speaker: I've been told there'll be no shenanigans allowed, but I'm gonna pull off some sort of shenanigans because I'm telling you you need to get somebody to object pull out a Nerf gun shoot him and then go right back Have my best man shoot Anybody else cap gun it could be a Nerf gun like I said Sword fight
Speaker: I say that video, right, where that guy comes up, after all that fighting, he's like, wait, this isn't the Kowalski wedding? Oh, sorry. Yeah. Have somebody object, my best man steps up and says, I'm your Uncle Barry, and shoots him. He's the gun that comes out and says, bang. Yeah.
Speaker: I'll be back You go back and you're in the back you're fighting and somebody comes in guys your mics are still on Oops
Speaker: of the
Speaker: Yeah. Oh, when I get nervous or, uh, you know, it starts to get too serious than just an actual reaction is to, yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. You just give her a hug and then squeeze one out. Yeah. Well, good. But I mean, you know, uh,
Speaker: I, I couldn't have written down what I said because I would have never got it on paper. I have to go off the cuff. You know, I couldn't, I couldn't write it down. I'd be like, I'll do it on the night. You were saying your vows and the guy from SpongeBob was like three hours later. You're still like, apparently summer's writing. Apparently summer's writing, uh, writing my vows. So nice.
Speaker: All you got to do is memorize them then. Hi, pretty girl. Welcome to the show. Hey, can you do us a favor? Can you see if our Facebook audio is still up and running because we got in trouble for playing music that apparently I'm not allowed to play. So we got sucked. Yeah. Um, we talked about doing a new segment that I kind of want to get to. So I can get to get my phone plugged back in.
Speaker: Well, that's because I had to charge my wife's phone. Because I'm using my phone. OK, never mind. I asked nicely and everything, but never mind. Let's be honest. We didn't talk about it.
Speaker: I told you you have a new job and you have to do homework. I actually enjoyed it. It's going to bring up discussions. Yes, I know. I have all of those things. But I don't know if it's going to show up as still playing on my end because it's my Facebook page and it's set up through me. I don't know if it would be completely muted. I just wanted you to check. If you don't want to, don't worry about it. Never mind. Thank you.
Speaker: Bill Lord Almighty. She's like, um, who do I look like? You have a phone, a tablet and a computer and a computer and a computer. Thank you very much. And I'm using one phone and my computer and my tablet don't have Facebook on it. Anyways. Yeah. We were talking to the pre -show Wednesday night and yeah. And, uh, I was talking about wanting to do some segments and you don't do anything. So I said, this is going to be your job and I'm not going to lie. I actually kind of enjoyed it.
Speaker: You were nervous, weren't you? No, I wasn't nervous at all. I'm not going to lie. I just did not think that you were going to do it at all. No, not remember. I just think you'd be like, man, fuck it. That's my faith, sir. Yeah, fuck him. Have a little faith. George Michael. Fuck him. George Michael, that shit. But yeah, it is. George Michael, that shit. What? Take it to the ass? He sings that song, Faith.
Speaker: cuz I gotta have faith. Limp Bizkit does it too, they do a better version. Is that Jordan Michaels? Yeah, Jordan Michaels. That's what I thought. He was also gay. No, extremely. But the Limp Bizkit song is the one I know better. But yeah, they took us down on Facebook. Oh, nice. And I don't know if I can...
Speaker: re -up it. Now go ahead, you can go ahead and go ahead with your little, with your little introducing knowledge. This is the new, the new slot. Now this is, now, okay, so this isn't the official top five. I grabbed up a list of top five songs, top 20 songs, and I'm picking up my top five. However, the number one on this list and my number one are the same. So I'm okay with that.
Speaker: But this, the actual Born to Be Wild is actually I think number 15 or something like that. But it's for my top 5. I think it's fucked up on Facebook. My top 5 would be number 5 being Born to Be Wild, you know. Awesome song, you can't go, I mean you start off with that song when you take off. Agree, disagree, what do you feel? You start with that song when you take off?
Speaker: Yeah, just as you're like leaving the driveway, that song kicks on. Born to be wild. You know, because you're going on a road trip in this scenario. Well, I'm going to say me personally. It's a good road trip song. I don't know about starting a road trip. I usually start with a little journey when I start my road trip.
Speaker: Well, actually that's on the list. Don't stop believing or don't stop me now. Don't stop believing. That's usually my go to. That's not my top five. It's on the top. You say bored to be wild is number five or number one? No, I start with five. Number one being the best. The number one, the number one being number one. So number five. Okay. And then number four.
Speaker: And I'm sure I'll get flack from this. I'm going to be the 500 mile song. And I would walk 500 miles. I would walk 500 miles. One of the best pro script songs ever. Great song. Right? Yeah. Number three. And I know you like this song.
Speaker: Miss Connie Contain, here I go again. Ryan Whitesnake, dude. Number three, Whitesnake. Number two, Sweet Home, Alabama. As much as I like Skinner, as it pops up while I'm... What? Well, that's the only one I know by heart, I would say. I know I like other Skinner songs, but...
Speaker: That's the one I know. That song comes on no matter what I'm doing. It's cranked that shit up, dude. I honestly don't have many quote unquote road trip songs that are skinners. But if they come up while I'm driving, I crank them up. Right. Exactly. But I love skinners. Number one with a bullet.
Speaker: Golden earrings with a bullet ladies and gentlemen great our love my golden earring That's a good This is like a you know, 24 -hour drive, you know, it's getting late you turn that song on and you're just ready Oh, yeah, I'm ready for another four hours of driving sir Good tune that's my top five now the actual
Speaker: top 20 starts out. Number one is radar. Well, you had to go through the top 20. How about this is the top ones I have here on my screen. Radar Love, Sweet Home Alabama, Highway Star, which you and I had to look up. Mr. Blue Sky, here I go again. America, I'm going to be all right now. Long train running. Don't stop believing. Don't stop me now. And then born to be wild. That's ones I have on my screen.
Speaker: out of that top 20 list, in order. And I believe this is the top gear list. Top gear, the TV shows, top 20 list of driving songs. But that's my top five for this. You know, Radar Love is, when I first heard them say Radar Love, I was like, and then I started listening to the song and I was like, I get it.
Speaker: That's a good, that's a good, that's a good road tune, man. Yeah. I mean, if it comes on, on the radio, I'm cranking it up. You know, it's got a good tune, good beat and all that fun stuff. I'm not the biggest song guy in the world as it is, but like I said, there's my top five for it. Do you have any different songs that you would have put on your top five, sir?
Speaker: Well, like I said, you know, I always start my journey whenever I always start my journey with a little journey. I love me some journey.
Speaker: Yeah. Well, that's what I usually when I start a road trip, especially if I'm by myself, uh, you know, I go, I go through a journey playlist and don't stop believing, squeezing, touching, loving, whatever. Uh, you know, just, just all the journey, you know, journey hits, man. And that's just what I go to. Um, there's also something about singing along to the song is, is, is part of the whole thing.
Speaker: Yeah, for a moment, I know I can't. Those are the songs I know almost everywhere. Yeah, for a moment, I know I can't sing like Steve Perry. No. But I sing every song with my chest. Say it with my chest. Yeah. Usually, by the time I get to Journey song number four or five on my road trip, I'm like, I just ran a marathon. My whole body hurts.
Speaker: Yeah, that's that's our new little segment. I'm gonna do top five list on Saturdays Or should I do it every week? Okay, now I gotta I got four days to think think of something Maybe as I said as I as I I want to do that one because it has to do with cars I also do watch Netflix and car rides
Speaker: Really? Yeah, man. I'll put on one of my shoes, and I'll binge watch the shit out of it. Summer said that. Summer, you're also watching Netflix, so don't even judge me. While driving? That's dangerous at all. Don't worry about what I'm doing while I drive. I'm the greatest driver of all time. I didn't say that. I'm saying, because I know. Oh, it's not like I have a giant screen in my car that takes up my whole windshield.
Speaker: Yeah, it's just on my phone and it's more background. It's not like I'm sitting there watching as I said I put on a Goodest I'm the goodest driver the good She said that I got her on to it. I'm like like for instance I'll put on like scrub or not scrubs, but like psych or You've seen 400
Speaker: Yeah, criminal minds or some shit like that. And I can just, you know, I can just binge watch it, you know, especially if it's a seven, eight, nine hour drive, whatever. And it's on in the background and I don't have to watch. I can just listen. It's not like you're going to watch the new series that just came out.
Speaker: Yeah. Oh, it's not like I'm like, it's not like I'm like, Hey, Jeff, tomorrow I'm going to Tennessee to see a summer. So I figured on the way down there, I'm going to watch the accountant. I'm going to watch the accountant. I'm also going to watch a Scarlet Witch. I actually, there's a new show on Netflix that I just, I binged the shit out of last night. I don't know what it was last night. Last night I had a huge, massive headache.
Speaker: where I just could not get comfortable. I took a paracetamol and I came upstairs and I laid down, passed out at like three o 'clock in the morning. It's like really high re -strength at Advil, basically. You just wanted to use that big fancy word, that's all it was. Yeah, I wanted to sound fancy. I'm not a dummy. Look how smart I am. I can say a word. But I took the paracetamol and I came upstairs and laid down.
Speaker: And I instantly passed the fuck out. About about three o 'clock in the morning, I woke up and I was wide awake. So I started watching Metal Masters. It's a reality show where welders and artists, artisans that work with metal compete for $50 ,000.
Speaker: It was genius. I loved every second of it except for the ending Do you I did not like it? Do you like the What is the name of that damn show The the blacksmith that the were the guys make all the knives and stuff. Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Unfortunately, I don't have it on Netflix I have to actually watch it on YouTube and stuff like that. But yeah, man that show is I don't know
Speaker: No, not ministerial or something like that. Forged in fire. Forged in fire. That's what it is. Yes. Yes. I watch the shit out. That fucking that fucking show is like crap to me, man. Yes. I don't know what it is. But as soon as I. The only problem I had with it, they were doing artsy fartsy shit. You know, they were making sculptures. You know, the funny ones, the first one to go.
Speaker: was the most political person. And I was like, yep, get out of here. She was like, bye, bitch. Black Lives Matter, blah, blah, blah. And she was out. And I was like, ah, ah, get out of here. Well, why were you so excited? Why were you so excited that she was out, Jeff? Because Black Lives don't matter to you? No, no, it's because the way she went about it, she was going super woke about it. And I was like, look, this is not the place to do that.
Speaker: You know, because because there's a normal way to say Black Lives Matter. No, no, no, no.
Speaker: When you watch the show, you can tell everybody is like, oh, I'm going to do birds that move and this and I'm going to do an orca that is like a mobile. And she did a fist coming out of the ground and I was like, come on.
Speaker: I mean, it was just - Maybe that could have been a - Maybe that could have been a fist going into a butthole. Well, the funny thing is, is she also didn't follow the instructions. Like, for their first project, they were allowed to cut everything at their own shop. But nothing could be welcomed together. And nothing could be found pieces. And the first thing she did was pull out a fucking differential. And mount it.
Speaker: And they're like, yeah, you can't use this as a found piece. So she had to start pretty much from scratch. And she's like, oh, I didn't know. I'm like, oh, it was in the instructions. Yeah. Learn how to read. But it was really good. Sorry, Jeff. Touchdown. Oh, somebody got a home run. Excellent. Yeah. It was a home run. Home run three -pointer. 67 -yard touchdown rush for Michigan.
Speaker: But uh, yeah, well, you know, that's the thing like like on that show forged in fire that kills me because you know, they give them they give them, you know Like it has to be the from from the that the blade has to be 19 and a half inches long whatever You know or from from from handle from handle to tip it has to be 19 inches long who's jackass is all 17
Speaker: Well, yeah, that or it's like it's like 16 inches long and they'll be like, oh, well, you know, I don't I don't know what happened. Well, I know what happened. You can't fucking read a tape. Retarded fuck. It's called shrinkage. But I was watching my wife. What are you doing? I was like, I'm watching this show. She's like, it's three o 'clock in the morning as I just woke up. And so she started watching until she fell back asleep. And I said, you know what would make this show much better?
Speaker: What's going on, Justin? The problem I have with the show is they give these guys every tool you would ever need or want to build stuff. I'm like, you know what? Give these guys a MIG welder and a grinder, then tell them to build something amazing. That would impress the shit out of me. Because, you know, they're cutting stuff with a plastic cutter and a CNC, and I'm like, anybody can do that. I mean, granted, they only had 10 or 12 hours to build stuff.
Speaker: Like I said, give them a hammer, a grinder, and a MIG welder.
Speaker: Go for it. For some fire. I mean, they have they have their they have the tools and everything they need to do what they need to do. But, you know, the thing that makes it hard is that they're given like a two hour time window. You know, the first the first first stage first challenge. Yeah. They got like two or three hours to make the knife for, you know, form it all up. And then somebody's eliminated and then then they get two hours to make a handle and whatnot. A fully functional knife.
Speaker: You know, you essentially have five hours to make a fully functional knife. Well, these guys, you have everything you need. Sculptures. I mean, the one guy did a mobile that it was supposed to, a normal mobile would rotate, you know, the whole thing would rotate. He actually made it so that nothing rotated but his birds would move up and down.
Speaker: Yeah, it looked like it was amazing that he actually took a rotating motor and put an arm on it and attached Welding wire so that it would go up and down and it was amazing He actually won the challenge because it was nobody else thought anything But they gave him like spoons knives forks a full sheet of sheet metal and some horseshoes they had to use everything including every bit of the full sheet of sheet metal and
Speaker: His birds weren't amazing. The other guy, I thought he did better because he did an orca that moved because it was all, it was a kinetic challenge. Kinetic as in stuff move. But the one guy, the first challenge built himself, building himself. He built a mechanical thing that literally had an anvil in front of it and had a hammer that would move and half his face would come down. It looked like the hammer was hitting the face and it would come back up like he was testing it. It was amazing.
Speaker: Yeah, that would be pretty badass. From scratch. Like he showed up with a couple pieces of bar stock and he's grabbing his bicep and he's bending metal around his bicep and he's like, yeah, that's about the size of my bicep. And then he welded on and it looked amazing. Yeah. But you know, the whole thing was like half built and it looked like he was building himself as he was doing it. It looked amazing. And they asked for one moving part and he had like four.
Speaker: And of course he won. He didn't win the entire thing, which I was upset about because the last challenge was to build a post -apocalyptic vehicle. And he built a bison. And the only thing they were given was a golf cart that was just the frame and batteries. And he built a bison that he could ride.
Speaker: Oh, like the animal bison? Yeah, like the animal bison, yeah. The other guy built like a car, you know, that he sat in. And this guy built a bison and the head would turn as the wheels turned. And he actually used a rope and pulley system to actually turn the wheels. And he sat, he was like eight foot off the ground. And anyway, he didn't win. And I was kind of pissed about that because I really liked that. He won most of the challenges.
Speaker: But it's really cool because the other guy actually built a car. Because if you're going to be in a post -apocalyptic world, why would you get on top of a metal bison? Wouldn't you get inside? If they're zombies, it's a post -apocalyptic zombie apocalypse kind of thing. So if there's zombies, you don't want to be on top of it. Maybe on the top of your bison, you've got a machete or a gun or whatever.
Speaker: Wow. Wow. Okay. Well, you're definitely dead in the zombie apocalypse. I was going to say like a giant fucking Gatling gun. Well, the other guy had the other guy built a built a miniature car with with three guns, three Gatling guns, one on each side, one on top. Electrified fence. So if anything tried to climb up there, then just get blasted off, electrocuted.
Speaker: But it was an interesting show. If I was in a zombie apocalypse... If I was in a zombie apocalypse, I would totally have a badass bison to ride on. No, I would be a Chevy truck and just wheel a bunch of spikes to it and just drive around. Fear the bison rider. The bison rider comes at night.
Speaker: At one point, I was like, you know, if he had smoke coming out of that bison's head out of the nozzle, that'd be cool. I would have given him a win right there. But like, it looked really cool. They had to make a grill that looked like something you would grill. So like, the one team did a, what looked like a lobster tail. And you would open it up and on its sides grill.
Speaker: And the smokers, they came out of the fins of the lobster tail. Those are the guys that won that one. But it was really interesting because they literally are told what they have to build and then say, you got 10 hours. And they're like, build a grill that looks like something you would grill. And I'm like, oh.
Speaker: like build a hamburger that is actually, you open up the bun, it's a grill. Nobody did that. Nobody did a fish. It was weird. Three people did fish. One person did a, one team did a... Well, probably. They were probably looking more at the... I don't know if this is the right word.
Speaker: Yeah, like the aesthetics, the gills and all that stuff. One guy did have the gills open and the smoke would come out the gills. And then one of the fins of that fish was actually a spatula too. So the spatula gets stored in the bottom of the fish, pulled out, you got a spatula. And then when you open it up, the ribs of the fish was the grill top. It was really cool.
Speaker: Oh, that's right. Yeah, like I said, totally check it out. It's totally it's it's something to have on in the background kind of thing. Well, the part where they're actually building
Speaker: Yeah, but the actual well, that's that's that forged in fire. That's one of the one of the things that I like the most about the show is is showing when they're when they're building and they're doing everything. That's so cool to watch. But I'm also the guy that will go to the Renaissance Festival and stand and watch the blacksmith all day long. You know, I say it's with reckless abandonment and go, I want to do that one day. Hey, you know, you're looking online for price of anvils.
Speaker: Jeff, I have to tell you something. Yeah. It's very important. You got to fry some chicken. Or are you going to crack a deer? I know you heard that. I thought you moved your chair. Gross! I was like, OK, you moved his chair. What's he doing now? I moved my chair on the carpet. I was waiting for a rack up here. It literally sounds like a chair going across.
Speaker: Nice. Just so you know. Nice. I appreciate it. That's my special gift to you. My wife told me I'm not allowed to cook pork no more because I made pork in air fryer today and like literally I came up after eating, I came up, climbed on the bed and first thing I did was let one out and she's like, you're not allowed to make pork anymore because it gives you the fucking gas. And I was like, my bad.
Speaker: Well, uh, the kids wanted chili tonight for dinner. So we'll chili a beer for you. But on that note, Jeff's Netflix show of the week, uh, we're up against, we're going to take a real quick break. What's that? That's what I should do instead of top five Netflix movie or show for the week. I mean, whatever you want to do, you can do both of them. Actually, it brings more content to the show. There you go. More content is good.
Speaker: Yes. We're going to take a little break. But speaking of your top five, I happen to have a song from the top, top five. Bye black. Well, it's a cover by black .mo, Joe Facebook. We have a fucking permission. Yeah. Silly sons of bitches. Suckers. When we get back, when we get back from break, guys, we're going to die window.
Speaker: licks news what the fuck news all right what the fuck dude we're bringing it back ladies and gentlemen so we're gonna take a real quick break and we will be right back enjoy a little blacktop mojo i gotta go fry chicken yeah me too maybe it's gonna come up i'm so scared of facebook and now it doesn't want to come up there we go two no my fear first
Speaker: Better than to let you go alone It's times like these I can't make it on my own Wasting days in sleepless nights And I can't wait to see you again I've finally spent my time waiting on your call
Speaker: I cannot tell you, babe, my back's against you I need you by my side to tell me it's alright Cause I don't think I can take anymore Is this love that I'm feeling? Is this the love?
Speaker: I've been searching for is this love Or am I dreaming this must be love? Because it's really God
Speaker: I can't stop the feeling I've been this way before But with you I found the key to openly do I can feel my love for you going stronger day by day And I can't wait to see you again So I can hold you in my arms Is this love?
Speaker: That I'm feeling Is this alone? That I've been searching for Is this love? Or am I dreaming This must be love
Speaker: Is this love that I'm feeling? Is this a love that I've been searching for? Is this love or am I dreaming this must be love?
Speaker: Hold on me Yeah
Speaker: and welcome back to nonsense school nonsense such a good look at Jeff still hanging out with you guys Saturday night you know what it is you know what we uh we started the show on such a serious note we forgot we don't do addresses to everything I forgot to do the do the the the business man
Speaker: Yeah, you're letting me, so. I don't laugh. My bad. So, uh, welcome back guys. Uh, if you're not already, go ahead and check us out on social media at nonsensical nonsense on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, YouTube, Twitch. Uh, go give us a liking, a thumbing, a follow. Jeff prefers the old thumbing if you know what I mean. And, uh,
Speaker: If you're checking this out live for the first time and you're digging what we do, feel free to check out every episode on Anchor, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, I think it is, and Google Play. And pretty much anywhere else you get your podcast jollies again at Nonsensical Nonsense. And you can do so at Nonsensical Nonsense Podcast at gmail .com.
Speaker: I was waiting for the jollies. I was waiting for the jollies and the thumbing. The thumbing and the jollies, just for Jeff. If you wanna hit us up on that email, feel free to, we're looking for guests, looking for, just guests to join the show, whether you're a musician, actor, comedian, another podcast host, anything like that, we can help each other out. Yeah, help us help you.
Speaker: What are you doing dude Jerry McGuire dude? I'm not you. I actually just Kicked my door open and he's got his shorts Hey, he's got his shorts pulled up to his nipples and nice He's standing like a gorilla in my doorway. He's doing the 80 year old man bit and I'm fired apparently so I
Speaker: I don't know what I'm fired from but I'm doing a podcast. It'd be great if you shut the door and vacate the premises. Amen to that. No, do not burn the house down. Jesus Christ. Wow. This motherfucker just had to burn the house down. Like you're going to say yes to that. Sure. I guess. Sure.
Speaker: Whatever, I guess it's Saturday. There's nothing better to do. Straight tomorrow. Set the house on fire, whatever. Jesus. That actually reminds me of a story of my wife and I when our son was... I think... How was Kevin when he almost... No, he's singing along with the music. We were renting a house.
Speaker: the house we actually had before this and our son was maybe six. And for my birthday one year, my wife had gotten me a Zippo. And. Well, you said in the past that Kevin's a bit of a pyromaniac.
Speaker: Well, no, what happened was is I, my wife and I had gone to bed and we had what we used to call a tower, which is just a, a six foot or seven foot tall tower of shelving, right? And I've set my cigarettes and my Zippo up there and in the drawer and the bottom of said tower, I don't know why, but it was open and it had all our important paperwork. It was our paperwork drawer.
Speaker: And my son, and we had a whole stack of like a 24 roll pack of toilet paper that we had just bought and set it down. We hadn't even put anything away. We brought it home, set it down. And we had gone to bed. And we had worked late that night. My son got up before us.
Speaker: And it's not like he went downstairs and started goofing off. No, he started playing with my Zippo. And of course, what happens when a young kid plays the Zippo and they're still playing with it and the fire's already lit, they burn themself and the fire doesn't go out right away because it's a fucking Zippo and he drops it right on the stack of toilet paper. And we wake up with flames tickling our toes.
Speaker: And to the point where we both went, what the fuck? And I, I remember jumping and grabbing a bunch of paperwork and toilet paper, throwing it in the shower and throwing, turning the shower on. So that that's what cash just reminded me of. I was like, yeah, you're going to be the first house on fire. Yeah. Right. Oh God. What did I do? Oh God. Stop. Stop. What happened?
Speaker: I'm over here pushing buttons. Don't worry about me. Don't worry about me. Nothing. Nothing to see here, folks. This is the last time I was, my wife bought me a lighter. Now she steals some ice. Every time, my wife will be like, give me a lighter so I can light the stove. I'll never see that lighter again. So I go over and I light the stove myself now. Or else I'll lose a lighter. I've lost more lighter stuff. Yeah, why? Because she's like, I set it down. I'm like, where?
Speaker: Worst thing ever. I call it the lighter thief or her friends will come over that smoke like, let me borrow your lighter. I'm like, no, I'll light it for you because I'll lose the lighter. There's nothing worse than losing the lighter.
Speaker: Yeah, I have lighters. I have lighters pretty much everywhere. But I also summer will come up here and she'll steal my lighters or snakes later. She'll come up here and I'll have four lighters and then I won't be able to find them while she's here. And then when she leaves, magically, I end up with 10 lighters. And she's like, what the fuck? Well, I couldn't find the lighter the whole time she was here in my house. It's rarely.
Speaker: Very rarely, I don't have a lighter in my pocket. And if I set it down, and then I go in another room, and I go to light a cigarette, I'm like, hey, oh, shit. I feel like naked without a lighter in my pocket. I'm like, what? Oh, oh. And I got to go find the lighter. Even if I'm not going to smoke a cigarette, I just got to have a lighter on me. And if I don't have a lighter, and one of my friends, I run into somebody, he's like, hey, let me light my cigarette. Let me light her. I don't have one. They're like, what's wrong with you? Because I always have a lighter.
Speaker: Yeah, but with your with your little what the fuck my sons of pyromaniac story that will lead us right into a little bit of Perfect this action little what the fuck? Yeah
Speaker: Who gave this man a sound effect board? It's what the fuck news with Glick. That's all you need a fucking intro, Jesus. Right? Hey man, I'll get you an intro for your top five. Countdown, yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, a little intro music or some shit. It's Jeff's Top Five. So we get Rock Lee on the phone. Well, you know, since it's Saturday and I'm a Michigan fan and I'm watching the Michigan game while we're doing this broadcast, why not
Speaker: have the first story come to us from that state up north as idiots around Ohio like to say, because they can't say Michigan, they take M's out of their, yeah, they take M's out of their words that have M, because God forbid they use M. Fucking retard. How's that?
Speaker: Drive Ohio State player driving back from the Michigan game. His car broke down instead of getting a fish fixed in Michigan. He pushed it like 12 miles across the border. I don't know. Very well could be a lot of a lot of a lot of restaurants and stuff in like down on campus and in Ohio, Michigan week, anything on their menu.
Speaker: or even their menu, they, they put a red X through the M. Oh my God. So it'll just say, and it'll just say in you. It's so stupid. It's the dumbest God damn thing ever. But Ohio state fans are being real fucking quiet tonight because they got their dicks not knocked in the dirt this afternoon. So they're not, they're not feeling so proud of themselves right now, but, but anywho, that's neither here nor there. Yeah.
Speaker: I got a story for you, Joe. Okay. It involves porn. Nice. It's one of my favorite subjects. Yeah, headline here. Nice. Parents must pay $30 ,441 for getting rid of their son's porn stash.
Speaker: Wait a minute. How old is this kid? He's 43. Okay. I'm with him. I'm with him. If he was like 15 or something like that, I'd be like, fuck that kid. But if he's 41. So in Grand Haven, Michigan, a judge has ordered a Western Michigan couple to pay $30 ,441 to their son for getting rid of his porn collection.
Speaker: The U .S. District Judge Paul Maloney's decision this week came eight months after David working 43 won a lawsuit against his parents. He said they had no right to throw my collection of films, magazines and other items.
Speaker: Judging by the fact that this douchebag literally sued his parents for getting rid of his porn collection, he probably had a large assortment of anal plugs and no anal lube, because he sounds like that kind of little cut bastard who used to watch his wife get railed by seven guys while... All the things to take somebody to court over. I don't think I'd do it.
Speaker: You're like, no, I don't want people to know when I watch that. So, yeah, exactly. You got rid of my donkey part? Yeah. Well, he said that they had no right to throw out his collection of films. Magazines and other items working had lived, he had lived in their home for 10 months after a divorce before moving to Muncie, Indiana.
Speaker: Okay, the judge Yeah, he moved back home when he got divorced clearly obvious reasons I wonder why he got divorced and then then he moved from
Speaker: Grant Hay from Michigan to Indiana. I don't know how far Grant Haven from Muncie is, but the judge followed the value set by an expert at MLive .com reported. Working's parents also must pay. They not only have to pay the 30, almost 35, $30 ,500 to him, they also have to pay $14 ,500 in his, to their, to his attorney.
Speaker: So they're paying, they're basically paying $45 ,000. Good God. Um, because his parents, it says, uh, after, after moving to Indiana, working, learn that his possessions were, were missing. It says, frankly, David, I did you a favor getting rid of all this stuff. His dad said in an email. So.
Speaker: Yeah. It doesn't, it doesn't say much about the family. It doesn't say much about if they're wealthy or anything like that, but $45 ,000 for throwing on the wall during the next Christmas party they have. I would be willing to bet. I'm pretty sure he's not going to be there.
Speaker: Or get invited. I'm pretty sure he's not invited to anything. And in all honesty, if he was my son, he might have an accident. Accidents happen every day. Yeah, brakes go out. Yeah, brakes go out, the tree falls on your head. Yeah, brake pads didn't go back on your truck. Oh, my bad. I know I forgot something.
Speaker: No, I mean, that, that is kind of a dick move taking your parents to court for something quote unquote trivial. Oh yeah, exactly. I mean, in a matter of speaking, I mean, seriously, 90 % of what he's probably had, you can find on the internet. Am I wrong? Well, not only that, not only that.
Speaker: But why do you have $30 ,000 worth of pornography and basically porn and sex toys? Well, okay, the sex toys I don't know about. But I know for a fact, I knew a guy in Mansfield that he actually collects old playboys. And he's got every playboy from like the first ever until today's date. You know, well, the last one issue. He's got them all.
Speaker: I've got a, you know, I've got a few, uh, playboys that I like being a wrestling fan. They were back in the day. There were several, several quote unquote divas as I used to be called that, that posed and playboy. And I have those see that, but I mean, well, no, I have them. I still have them right now. First ever one is worth like a shit ton, dude. Like 10, 15, 20 grand. Uh, I've got one with, uh, Maryland. I've got one with Marilyn Monroe in it. I think that's expensive.
Speaker: they're in good shape, they're in good condition. I've got some oldies, some quote, quote, quote, quote, together. But this whole story, this whole situation, because I looked into it a little bit, but this whole situation comes down to the fact that it really, in all honesty, it sounds like they're fun. They're fun. Their son is a is a fucking deviant. Like he's just had all this weird fucking shit.
Speaker: Right. Yeah. It just sounds like you had all this weird fucking shit. Not like you hit it. And they didn't want it in our house. Yeah. Right. His parents didn't want it in their house and he was like, well, fuck you, mom and dad. I'm going to have it here. And then he moved out and they're, you know, while, you know, whatever the case may be, they were like, all right. Help me load up. Whoa, this one just accidentally fell off the truck.
Speaker: Okay, you weirdo we told you we don't want this shit in our house go get a fucking storage you didn't put it in the house Yeah, respect your mom and dad's wishes I know I totally get that like I I'm not gonna lie. I had a porn stash back in the day Now I have the internet but but my bones that you could be Houdini and not find mine you could be a detective and not find mine because who hasn't had a porn stash or
Speaker: or sex toys, you know, for, you know, there's a, there's not a whole lot, just a couple of things. I used to have totes full of dildos. You got much, I don't think I've ever had a sex toy. There's a, oh man, your wife is missing out. There is a, I know.
Speaker: yeah trust me it's not it's not a bad thing that it's not a bad thing to have sex toys no no i'm not saying the dance i'm not saying the dance oh man no but like i remember uh one time we went and they opened up a a quote -unquote toy shop here and we went in as a joke and like a crazy expensive
Speaker: and B, most of the stuff that we would buy were way too big. Like the size of my farm. She's like, no, no, no. I don't know why you would buy that, but unless you're buying it for yourself, which doesn't surprise me. But there are several toys that are not crazy big like that. No, you can get the little ones that look like
Speaker: Lipstick that vibrates the shit out of everything. Yeah summer's got a toy that would she She she first talked about buying and I was like, yeah, you gotta buy that you know You know, I guarantee it just because of reviews and different things I heard from people not only does she buy one
Speaker: She's got one in every room. She's got one here, and she's got one down there. That's a good thing. That way you don't have to worry about traveling with it. Yeah. And I bought a few things. Just because you have sex toys in your bedroom doesn't mean that you can't
Speaker: Well, no, I was gonna say more for you because you've got this pride thing in this little man syndrome It doesn't mean that you can't perform No, you can't you can't satisfy her. There's nothing wrong with experimentation and there's nothing wrong with with a little extra help or You know Those times you're alone
Speaker: Well, exactly. And like I said, you know, trust me, I don't need any help with summer. It's just fun to have, you know. Oh, no. It makes an amazing extra night.
Speaker: Yeah, they're just fun toys to have, you know, essentially they're toys. They're fun to have. It's a little something extra. And, you know, you guys can play together. You know, it's not a matter of, oh, well, I can't get the job done. So she needs this. So I'm just going to hurry up and get my rocks so she can finish doing what she's doing and what she needs to do and then go to bed.
Speaker: You know, it's not like that or it's not like, Oh my God, I can't get the, you know, it's all like, Oh fuck, I suck up. I'm a horrible person. I can't, I can't, yeah, I can't do the job. So she's going to have this toy. No, it's nothing like that. It's like, say it's there. Yeah, exactly. There's nothing wrong with, with a little extra. You know, it's kind of like, it's kind of like, you know, wibble by lingerie.
Speaker: You know, yeah, just, you know, don't need it, but it does. It does kind of like, Hey, I know what we're doing tonight. Don't, yeah, don't need it. Yeah. Don't need it in any way, shape or form, but you know, it's, it's, uh, it's nice. You come in and it's, it's, it's, it's a little schoolgirl off. Oh yeah. Yeah. It shows that there's thought being put into the process.
Speaker: you know, like, oh, you do really want to do this tonight. Cool. Or, you know, it's a nice surprise too. Some people might come in with the suitcase, open the suitcase and it's full of toys. Jeff, these three are going in your butthole. Wait a minute. We don't play our game here. I don't think so. Only three. I was waiting for a moment.
Speaker: I mean, I guess those three, as long as I get a good old fashioned thumbing, make sure you still put your thumb in there. But I mean, you know, and it, that goes along with what we were talking about the other week is like different positions, you know, as much as I like missionary, it gets old.
Speaker: you know it's it's not it's not something you do every night but it's it's you know you know it's like when you when you play baseball you know do you throw the same pitch every time no you switch it up throw a curveball there's my sports reference for the episode but you know I mean there's
Speaker: There's, there's other things in life that, you know, if you have multiple cars, do you take the same car every day? No. Uh -oh. Cash is here. No. He, uh, went to go, uh, fry some chicken and he was trying to scare me. Oh my gosh. Uh -huh. Yesterday, my daughter, er, was, no, it was, uh, I think it was Thursday.
Speaker: My wife and I were having a conversation. My daughter had just gotten out of the shower. She'd gotten clothes on, but she hadn't dried her hair. And she had a towel over her head. And my wife and I were having a serious conversation. We didn't want the kids to hear. And I didn't remember what the fucking conversation was. But I leaned over to go, hey, go to your room. But she didn't see me lean over. And she moved the towel just so I went, hey. And she almost shit herself.
Speaker: She was so mad for the next 20 minutes. She wouldn't come in my room. We were like, come back in. It's okay. Come here. No, no. She was all mad. We laughed for a good 20 minutes about it. Then of course she was embarrassed about it. So she got all mad. Yeah.
Speaker: I think I think suing your parents over something like that, I don't think I would ever sue my parents unless they deliberately killed a pet or family member, you know? Yeah, exactly. Like a turtle, whatever. Yeah, well, that's the thing. Like I said, it's just, um,
Speaker: Uh, it's just a real, it's, it's one of those things. It's just like, Hey, it's a dildo move. Boom. It's such a dildo move. No, I like, like, Hey, I would like to know what was in this quote unquote collection. Yeah. That cost over 30 grand and who the fuck's got 30 grand. Yeah.
Speaker: Be clearly you weren't hiding it because your parents had a problem with it They were doing you a favor you were going through a divorce And going through some shit in your life, and they're like well come stay with us for a little bit until you get everything squared away Yeah, you know respect the wishes if they don't want it in the house clearly They're an older couple the man's 43 years old so I'm assuming now. I'm almost I'll be 40
Speaker: Yeah, I'll be 40 in a couple weeks. I think my dad's like 175. My old man's like 60 something, I think. I don't think. My old man's hitting 70 something. Yeah. I'm one of those. Just be a little bit respectful.
Speaker: You know, if they don't want it in their house, take it and get a storage unit. Don't be in the trunk, get a car or something. Yeah. Something like that.
Speaker: But off that subject. Off that subject. What's going on, Pat? How's it going, brother? Hey, pretty girl. Welcome back. We like to make dated references and stuff like that, especially when we talk about criminals. And clearly, we're both 1920s gangsters.
Speaker: you'll never take me alive. See? Well, let's uh let's uh let's take a trip down to one of our favorite places in the United States of America.
Speaker: Let's go to Miami, Florida. Florida. Florida. Florida. This is just a really cool story, I think. I've seen it the other day and I thought it was really cool. Al Capones.
Speaker: Former South Florida home is slated for demolition. Why? That would be demolished. I don't know. I would think that that would be put as a historical landmark. Yeah, something. But it says the South Florida house that gangster Al Capone owned for nearly two decades and died in.
Speaker: So he owned the house for over 20 years and he died in it, is facing demolition plans. The Miami Herald reported that the new owners of the nine -bedroom Miami beach house plan to demolish it after buying it for $10 .75 million.
Speaker: three feet below sea level has flood has flood damage and standing water underneath it. The new owners plan to build a two -story modern spec home with eight bedrooms, eight bathrooms, a jacuzzi, spa, and a sauna. Okay. Considering it's a decay and it's been flooded several times, it's probably not habitable. So you repair it. You clearly have more money. And if that's who I think it is that has more money than God, right?
Speaker: one of the owners
Speaker: Um, repair it, fix it up, elevate it. Y 'all know you can elevate a house, elevate it, and keep it. But, uh, the how he, Glaser said the house is a piece of crap. It's a disgrace to Miami. I, I feel like you're kind of a douchebag. Miami's a disgrace to Miami. Yeah. Yeah. Dildo move. Good Lord. No, but I mean, but, um,
Speaker: I mean, the man died. He's the greatest, he's the most known, I don't want to say greatest, but the most known criminal in the United States. Everybody knows who Al Capone was. Even if they don't know what he did. He's a gangster, man. He's a real life gangster. Yeah, like one of the first.
Speaker: Um, but yeah, I mean, it just blows my mind. You know, it, there's so much that can be done there. You, you can, you can repair it, remodel it. Yeah. Turn it into a tourist trap, whatever. I mean, there's a lot, there's a lot that could be, that could be done there. I mean, or just relocate the house alone. The Halloween party's alone.
Speaker: everybody dressed up in the 1920s gear shit yeah I mean that's way better yeah no the swamp house is still a dress -up party where you know you do the murder mystery move
Speaker: Well, I mean you still you still dress up for the the swamp house party Well, you gotta dress up. It's Halloween. You know, it's just that location Mystery you could murder mystery theme parties in their year -round because it's Al Capone's fucking house You know what?
Speaker: Yeah, speaking speaking of our okay for you to get a total understanding. Yeah. I know you got all your websites and stuff that you watch when you get all your movies from. Mm hmm. Look up. Look up the hatchet series. There's like three or four movies in the hatchet series. Okay. Look those look those up and you'll see what I mean by like the swamp scary Halloween house. Okay. How badass it would be.
Speaker: Oh no, I have no doubt. It would be amazing parties at the Swamp House. I'm just saying. I mean, with the Al Capone House, you could have parties year round there, where at the Swamp House party, your main event is, yes, you could have parties that are just keggers. Yeah, go ahead.
Speaker: First of all, with the Swamp House, you can definitely do scary parties all year round there or scary themed defense all year round there because there's people like me that wish it was Halloween. I mean, I would totally rent that house out of this clue house, you know, murder mystery clue. Oh, yeah. Yeah. But yeah, you know, how cool would it be to do a murder mystery? Yeah. How cool would it be to do a murder mystery dinner theater thing? Well, not only Swamp House, but Al Capone's house.
Speaker: Yeah, dressed like you're like your fucking Al Capone. You know, the fedora, the fucking suit, the whole nine yards of the Tommy gun. Fuck yeah. I mean, I paid money. I paid money to have a vent there if I had any money. Oh, 100%. Pat is Pat is a little upset. And he's, and he's, he's been crying since Thursday. Poor little guy. Why? What happened?
Speaker: because because the Dallas Cowboys lost the Tom Brady and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers in the opening game of the 2021 NFL season. Oh my god. You think as a Dallas Cowboys fan, he'd be used to it. You think it was somebody like his dog died or something. You think as a Dallas Cowboys fan, he would just be fucking used to it by now. Ouch. Little shot in the dark there. And that's coming from a Browns fan. How's that feel? Yeah, no shit.
Speaker: That's that's left field shot, too. Yeah, because it's coming from the guy that you wouldn't expect to play late 80s, early 90s. The Browns suck. Well, it's been a long time. Odell, what was the guy's name? Oh, you saw on the team art something. Fuck that piece of shit. I'll piss on his grave. I'm pretty sure that dude was laundering money.
Speaker: through that team. That's why the team sees so bad because they didn't give a fuck. I will piss on that man's grave and then after I beat up the kangaroo and the bear as an apology and to make friends with them, I will feed Art Modell's children and grandchildren to them. I said what I said. Another person I could. But the funny thing is, I wonder if he's related to the Motel 6 guy. Oh no, nevermind. Sorry, nevermind. That's Tom Bodette. Nevermind, sorry.
Speaker: Yeah, every time I hear Modell, I think, I'm told Modell, we'll leave a light on for you. My dad used to say that all the time, commercial would come up all the time. My dad would always, somebody would be coming up, we'll leave a light on for you. I'm Tom Bodette, we'll leave a light on for you. I love those.
Speaker: You know, since we're talking about Florida over here, I only feel justified. I don't think I would be complete if I did not do a floor moment. Exactly. Since we're in Florida, you got to rip on Florida besides the moron trying to rip down Al Capone's house.
Speaker: A lot of those old gangsters and mobsters had places in Florida. Oh, yeah. You got to get away from the shootings, I guess. Well, not only that, but you're right there. You're right there on the log, the water. So if you're importing goods from Cuba, Puerto Rico, you know, a little, well, well, it wasn't anything sniffable. It was mostly alcohol. Anything.
Speaker: Yeah, but if that's
Speaker: that's what their big thing was. They were bringing alcohol from Canada. That's what made them gangsters. I'm like, dude, I can do that today. And they were like, all right, go ahead. But back in the day, it was not illegal. Yeah, it's gonna say it's not illegal today. But anywho, old down in Florida,
Speaker: How you feel about potholes in the road, Jeff? Oh, I hate them. I hate them. They're the ones, right? Especially when you're in, you know, especially when you're in, like, in a subdivision or this or the other thing. If you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're, if you're
Speaker: No, because... You ever bend a rim because of a fucking pothole? Well, you gotta be cool. No, because up until recently... Yeah, I was gonna say, up until I bought my cruise, I've only had trucks or SUVs, so... Yeah, well... Well, a Florida man... Yeah, go ahead. A Florida man... And this is in Tampa... Area -ish. A Florida man who was fed up with potholes... That's what he did. Is this the guy that drew dicks around him?
Speaker: No, this is a guy who planted banana trees in the potholes. Nice. This is Florida man fed up with potholes, plants, banana tree in the roads. Port Myers, Florida, a man fed up with a private road and a pork and pork condition near his Southwest Florida business has a novel solution. Plant a banana tree in the pothole to warn motorists away. Yeah.
Speaker: Brian Raymond planted a tree in a stubborn pothole along Honda Drive just off US 41 in South Fort Myers. Raymond, who owns Progress and Pride Fitness Group, said the idea of planting the banana tree ripened in his mind after having a few holes in the street with cement or after having to fill a few holes in the road with cement.
Speaker: there's a problem right there because you see because Honda Drive is yeah well because Honda Drive is a private street county official said it's up to the business owners to maintain the street for Raymond Banana Tree is an attention grabbing
Speaker: Repair so I mean he owns a business on that road so If we have to maintain it and make sure nobody gets hurt We're going to put something obvious there to make sure nobody gets into the hole radio Next thing you know, there's a tree in your fucking did I go throughout? Nope, you're dead center right on the lane. I
Speaker: I don't think the floodwaters have anything to do with a pile but
Speaker: Well, no, but the problem with the, the, the floodwaters is, is just like, you know, the biggest problem we have here when it rains and it floods, you can't see some pothole, even if the,
Speaker: especially at night when the potholes just filled with water, but the rest of the street is dry. You don't see it. You just keep going. And next thing you know, you're blowing a tire, bent your rim. Yeah. No, you know, a hundred percent. And we had the same thing down in Charleston. So, you know, not only, not only a, not only does it steer people away from the pothole,
Speaker: but as he said, it's an attention grabber. So I'm going to be like, wow, there's a tree right there. Oh shit. I should go to the gym. Actually. Yeah. So happens. There's a gym right there. So, you know, but, uh, staying in, uh, staying in Florida. I got another feel good story. I actually, this is a feel good story coming up. Okay. So I've disappointed you with Al Capone's house getting tore down. That made me feel a little better. I've, I've, I've hit you with a little floor. Yeah.
Speaker: Oh my funny bone with the banana trees disappointed me without a bone. Give me something to feel better. I would really appreciate if you never in the use these words in a sentence again. You like it. Tickle bone and banana when you refer to me. Tickle my banana with the bone. Tickle my bone with a banana. That would be fantastic. That would be awesome.
Speaker: It sounds like it sounds like New England in the springtime. No officer. I'm not drunk. I'm just swerving around the potholes. Yeah. There you go. So, so let me, let me give you a feel good story out of Florida. Okay. That says a Florida man wins $1 million superhero.
Speaker: Yeah. When you, when you utter, when you utter the word Florida man, you already start shaking your head and face palming. Here we go. But it says the story says the headline says that Florida man wins $1 million the day he opened his auto shop.
Speaker: Oh, yeah. Down in Callahan, Florida, a Florida man, one, one million in a lottery game. The same day he and his wife opened their auto repair shop. Brian Woodall 46. Yeah. Brian Woodall 46, about a $5 gold rush, uh, Supreme scratch off ticket from circle take circle K and Callahan. He said, uh,
Speaker: a a a Brian said I love working on vehicles it's always been a dream to own my own repair shop at the end of our first day I stopped at circle take circle K to get a few things and I picked up a lottery ticket just like that we won a million bucks he he said he selected to take the one time lump sum
Speaker: of $880 ,000. The lottery said the Circle K store will receive a $2 ,000 bonus commission for selling the winning ticket. But could you imagine, and it doesn't go much into detail, but I've known people who have decided to start their own business and they think
Speaker: Yeah, not a loser scared Tools and equipment and you don't know if it's gonna come out They say when you start a business your first year you will not hit black black being good in your books green is green is bad and Red is right in the middle and they say you never be in the black your first year and
Speaker: So this guy is literally, I mean, depending on the size of his shop, let's say it's a two bay shop with two lifts. And let's say he bought said brand new lifts. He's maybe looking at like he put 200 grand into this fucking thing. And now he's, you know, 600 grand up. Well, that's the thing. Well, you know, that's the thing. That's that's what I was going to say. You know, you know, most people they, you know,
Speaker: they have their dream, this is what they want. And you automatically, you put everything you have into it. And you don't know if you're going to sink or swim. You don't know what's going to happen. You're probably, you know, it's adding stress to your marriage. Well, on top of that, you know you're going to miss Robin for the next six months.
Speaker: Yeah, you just don't know what's gonna happen So this guy goes out him and his wife. They're like, all right, let's do this. Let's let's take this venture Let's take this risk and they're prepared to he had to convince her He's like, well, I know we can do this and she's like, I don't know Bob you know, it's a big risk and he's like look I promise you we will make money and
Speaker: God damn. We need he needs a plaque on his shop that says the date says on this day this man was right. Well, well, his life wrong. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, whether, whether they were, whether they were in agreement or not, you know, they're both prepared for the worst. They're both prepared for the what ifs, the, oh my God, you know, whatever. And, but they're excited, you know, they're excited. This is the new step. And they're looking forward to it. And this, that and the other thing. And this goofy fucker goes to the gas station. Give me one of them scratch offs. Can you imagine that phone call, uh, baby?
Speaker: Honey, you know that new Mercedes you were looking at? What color do you want? You know how we were worried about the new auto shop and how we were going to pay our bills and this and the other thing? Well, let's just say... We're not opening today. We're opening next week after we get back from vacation. We're good because I just won $300 ,000 on a lottery ticket.
Speaker: You know, a brand new BendPak lift is like 30 grand. And then as an auto mechanic, tools are not cheap. So, you know, in BendPak lift, I doubt he's got BendPaks because they're so expensive. But let's say when I bought BendPaks, two BendPak lifts, that's 60 grand. Tools, you're looking at anywhere 70, 80 grand depending on brand. And if you go snap on it. What's going on, Wigga?
Speaker: You know, and then he probably rents the building because it's a startup unless he actually owns the building. If he owns the building, great. But if it's a startup, the first thing I would buy is the building. Oh, a hundred percent. You know, so you don't have that weight over your head ever again. You know, buy and pay it off. If you make money, great. You know, every dollar you make is, you know,
Speaker: But like I said, if he's taking a lump sum of 800 grand and some change, I'm sure, but if he takes a lump sum of 800 grand, let's say he's got maybe 150, 200 grand in the building, he's sitting on 600 grand. He's in the plaque a lot. Yeah. And he can literally do his first, he could be like first customer free. What do you got?
Speaker: or 100 customers free. If you get some rebuild, rebuild my motor and transmission. As a brand new business owner, it really doesn't fucking matter if I just won a million dollars or if I won $2 billion, I ain't giving shit away for you. Oh, hell no. No, but I mean, you know, that'll bring in customers. Yeah.
Speaker: I mean, he could literally spend, what, 20 grand on advertising on the radio and internet ads and not have to worry about it. Like, if I won a million dollars today, the first thing I'd do is do ads for this. Oh, yeah, exactly. I'd spend the rest on tools, but whatever. I'm like, yes, I am getting that brand new tool.
Speaker: Yeah. Well, I got, I got one more story for you. All right. Then we're going to take a, we got to take a, uh, uh, real quick break because it is Saturday and we have to go a little longer on Saturdays. Um, but, uh, because I don't feel like we get enough of these.
Speaker: the first million people who send the first million people who send me one dollar get a copy of my book titled how to become a millionaire for only 1099 or 999 for free shipping that's from that's from our that's from our buddy Wiga Wiga G
Speaker: Hey, you know, there was actually you remember I it's before our time, but you remember Captain Kangaroo, right? Around that time before you and I were born, I'm talking like in the 70s, right? There was a there was a morning clown, right? And he would do it would show cartoons. I don't know.
Speaker: Yeah, you're talking yeah, you're talking about buzz of the clown in Chicago Yeah Well, yeah, he was really starting out before He would tell kids hey kids going your mom and dad's wallet and grab a couple dollars and send them to this address and Send it to bozo and he got like four million dollars for it So, I don't know if it was bozo or something else but this dude would literally tell kids going mom and dad's wallet when they're not looking and
Speaker: Six years old to send him money. Yeah So, you know kids if you're listening But if you are listening Grab a $20 bill for mom's wallet
Speaker: Yeah. Send it to nonsensical nonsense. But like I said, I got I got I got speaking of money. Speaking of leaving people money and giving people money. I got one more story to close out to close out. What the **** news with flick? Yeah. Uh a diner and this is in Florida. So, we're we're hanging out in Florida tonight. We got because we get very rarely
Speaker: very rarely do we get few good stories out of florida and i got a cheaper for you tonight few and far between very rarely do we not get what the fuck was this guy thinking why in the fuck come on florida be better yeah i got two for for you on the yeah i got it be like desantis be like tom brady be the good be better no desanta the governor of florida he's fucking on yeah desantis desantis no desanta
Speaker: No, it's not. It's the Santas. Santas? Yes. I listened to a radio station every day for like the last 10 years out of Tampa, Florida. Oh, okay. Oh, it's Carlos Mencia. That's what it is. Not George. That's why Mencia sounds... That's why Mencia just popped into my head.
Speaker: That's why MNCS sounded weird to me. Cause it's Carlos. Now it makes sense. Yeah, it's Carlos. Yeah. It just popped into my head. Squirrel. Um, all the American money has racist faces on it. Send it to me immediately so I can dispose of it properly. Yes, I agree. Send, send all your American money to, uh, nonsensical nonsense and we're good Jesus. So we can dispose of it properly with Benjamin Franklin on them. I need all those. Yes. But, um,
Speaker: So in Gainesville, Florida, a diner at a North Florida restaurant gathered the staff of 10 together to thank them for their hard work before leaving them a $10 ,000 tip to share. Nice.
Speaker: Ten employees. Let's do the math real quick. Ten thousand dollars. That's a thousand dollars a piece. It happened last Tuesday night as the man, his wife finished dinner at the Wahoo Seafood Grill in Gainesville. Sean Shepherd who owns Wahoo. Oh God. Oh God. I'm losing my mic. There we go. Fixed it.
Speaker: Sean Shepherd, who owns Wahoo, told the newspaper he got a call from his employees at night alerting him to a big to the big tip. His first thought was to be suspicious.
Speaker: Yeah. Check his ID and the name on the back of his credit card. Yeah, right. Shepherd advised his employees who called, but the restaurant's point of sale system approved the transaction. Shepherd said he checked back the next day to make sure the money was still there. Nice.
Speaker: Uh, watching these guys get, get their check was almost as good as Christmas morning. Shepherd told the son. He is very thankful to the diner because the employees have been loyal to the restaurant through the pandemic. Among the, among those benefiting from the big tip was actually grid green, who was called into work that day. She had recently endured a rough time because her daughter was ill, ill. Why can I not talk tonight? Jesus Christ. Words are hard.
Speaker: She's had a hard month. She's been not able to work. Kid has been in and out of the hospital. It's been absolutely a really stressful time for her, Sheppard said. When the coronavirus pandemic began, Sheppard said he temporarily closed the Wahoo and lost some $30 ,000 in food. Good Lord. I knew nothing about curbside. I knew nothing about delivery and takeout. We weren't prepared for that. We didn't even have the containers to do it, Sheppard said.
Speaker: he noted that the florida restaurant lodging that's in the freezer all the way to waste yeah he noted that the florida restaurant lodging association and the achula county chamber of commerce how do you like that florida that's what i'm talking about achula yeah chamber of commerce where it's going to help finding the
Speaker: But he said that the Chamber of Commerce was a big help finding them emergency funding to pay the employees. He reopened Wahoo in May. He said he's indebted to his employees because they've helped keep the restaurant afloat during these hard times. So especially now when everybody's quitting because you can make almost as much money on unemployment as you could working. Yes, exactly.
Speaker: shout out to Florida for bringing us. Oh, yeah. Some feel good. But especially you feel good story of all days. Yeah. You know, feel good story today of all days is a good day to have those good feel good stories. And when was this tip given? Does it say? Well, now you're now you're expecting me to do too much work. This was well, this story came out at the end of August. So just just a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker: okay still still that's that's fucking awesome yeah 100 % it didn't say who the temper was no
Speaker: which is how it should be, which is how it should be. If I'm gonna give somebody a bunch of money, I don't want my name being out there because I'm doing it not for the quote unquote fame or 15 minutes of fame. I'm doing it to make the employees feel worth the fucking damn.
Speaker: The people the people who the people who quote -unquote do good deeds But feel the need to put it all over social media and brag about it and make sure that they that everybody knows that it was them that did it That's the only reason they're doing it. They're doing it. They're doing it for likes. They're doing it for Even the guy I like to watch on YouTube
Speaker: And I don't want to give him a plug, but he does. He did a thing where he, he went in and asked for a glass of water and he started out with like a dollar tip and every place they went, it doubled until he went up to $10 ,000 tip. Yeah. And that wasn't, you know, he made money on that. So he didn't care. Yeah. Well, it's time to start watching the third one.
Speaker: Okay, well there's a there's a guy that I that I like that I that I like I'll take talk he does a He does a podcast and I'll listen to it from time to time. He does a pretty good job. Yeah, I like his podcast Holy English says Pat But he started doing that crap all his videos were him
Speaker: basically asking his followers to send money and then he would go to Starbucks and get a cup of coffee and donate or tip the guy at the window $400 or whatever. And he probably paid $4 ,000. So yeah, I mean, that's, that's, that's, I mean, yes, it's a good thing, but you're not doing it to be a good guy. You're doing it because you're actually making money on it.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. I'm sure it makes you feel good at the end of the day, but it probably makes your wallet feel really good when your fans are paying for it. Yeah, exactly. And then that's his whole gimmick on TikTok now. And it's like, all right, well, that's cool that you're doing all that stuff. But at the same time, you're getting a huge fucking payday out of it. You're making way more than you're giving away.
Speaker: You are 100 % absolute. Yeah. Absolutely. You're not, you're not paying it forward as much as you say you are. Like this guy that gave him a $10 ,000 tip that didn't give his name. He said, just take it. I don't want to be known. Don't, don't even say nothing. That's the, that's the real hero, you know, in these, these weird times. It's a wall. Bye. I love you.
Speaker: but that's that's that's real heroes the guy that doesn't want his name out there he's not doing it to be you know likes or whatever he's doing it because he can afford it a and B is a nice fucking guy yes like why you know
Speaker: Uh, a couple of weeks ago, we was live and, or last week or whatever, my buddy Joe came in and he said, $500 to shave your beard and hair. And I said, well, we can do a charity thing down the road. Um,
Speaker: And I was the douchebag going, Oh, I want the money. Yeah. You wanted the money. And I'm thinking like I could, we could do a charity thing and I could donate it to nationwide children's hospital or Ronald McDonald house or something like that. Right. Put it in my fucking wallet. And I'm like, Oh, I don't have any money. So I don't have any money either. You got more me, but you know what? I wouldn't say that.
Speaker: Well, you know, that's called Descartes. That's called putting good in the universe, man. No, that is true. That's true. That's putting the good vibes and the good energy out there. My wife is, she doesn't necessarily pray to a God anymore. She just puts stuff out in the universe. And I kind of like that because I'm not a religious guy by any means. Because you and I are nobodies on the spectrum as far as
Speaker: you know, internet fame or this, that or the other thing. But if I could do something to give some money, you know, like I said, to Nationwide Children's Hospital here, here in Columbus. And I say that because we're both from Ohio. We're both from central Ohio area. And we all know all the good that Nationwide does and plus help kids.
Speaker: I would, I would love to do cancer research or something. No, I'd be down for that. Yeah. I'll sit here and be broke as long as I can donate something to make. Yeah. I'll go, I'll go there for a couple of weeks. I'll eat ramen noodles. Well, that's a lot. I don't want to eat ramen noodles.
Speaker: Those things are gross, man. My kids eat the shit out of it. But I do. You know, that's something I've and I have an idea for a charity thing that I want to do. And we've got to get through this pandemic before I can really actually, you know, push it and promote it and try to do it because it's a lot of interaction things. So, right. But I still say we need that battle the crisis.
Speaker: not all the chris's are you already like that kid no the kid that remember that lazy prostitution no that guy that did uh a battle for his name all those people showed up with those pool noodles the joshas yeah the battle of the joshas we do a battle of the chris's we know about all the chris's charge a buck ahead and give the money to charity i'm helping is the same as saying i'm not racist says wigga
Speaker: What's your idea? There's so many. I got an idea, man. I can't put my ideas out there because some jackass will steal it. And then I'll be seeing it online and then I'll see it on TikTok and I'll have to go track them down and beat the brakes off of them. And then I'll be the guy who beat the brakes off of the guy who was doing a good deed. But no, I would totally shave my beard for charity. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, I mean, yeah. We got to do it soon because my wife's threatening to shave my beard in my sleep, so. She does, but she says it's getting too long. I'm trying to go full ZZ top. She won't let me. Yeah. Well, you know what? I'm going to bring that. I'm going to, we're going to take a real quick break and I'm going to bring that topic up. I'm going to bring that topic up when we come back. That's fine. I got to try to fry some chicken. I got to fry some chicken too. That's why I want to take a break.
Speaker: Oh, what should we do? You know what? Let's do a little, let's, I wish I had more music by Rocky. Let's do a little Rocky on this print. Yeah, let's do that. Rock Lee from EDM combat. Brother, my brother from a mother of a different color and friend of the podcast with his remake of Fosse's Judas. Yeah. Well, EDM action for you guys. Get down on that.
Speaker: Jeff, don't put your headphones on your mic. No. I didn't. I said I'm a...
Speaker: He woke in a senseless
Speaker: But losing the light, it took you by being inside quite What have I become, now that I've betrayed Everyone I've ever loved, I've pushed them all away And I have to lose, to listen to my mind
Speaker: Yeah Love that fucking remix Rocky killed it on that. I love that fucking song. Anyways, it's one of my favorite Dude you know who Chris Jericho is, right? Couldn't pick him out of a lineup. I've heard of him. He's a wrestler
Speaker: I mean, I know because you've told me, but like I said, I couldn't pick the dude off the line. I've heard the name. You said you was a fan back in the day though, right? The last time I watched wrestling that I can remember was I watched pay -per -view where Undertaker went up against, I think that Asian dude, Yakuza. Yakuzuna. Yakuzuna.
Speaker: Which is like I'm talking early 90s late 80s that was I believe that was I Don't know if that was a WrestleMania or summer slam, but I know the match you're talking about Yeah, I just remember seeing yoga zoom would fall in that fucking coffin. He was just frozen because oh, yeah Yeah, it was it was a it was a coffin. It was a call. Have a good night pat much love to you brother
Speaker: Yeah, Yokozuna had missed off Fuji in his corner. When the ref wasn't looking, he'd blow salt into the eyes of Yokozuna's opponents. Okay, well, Chris Jericho is probably one of the best wrestlers of all time. Dude was amazing in the ring, one of the best on the mic. Well, he started a band called Fozzy several years back.
Speaker: and they are awesome. I think Cameron asked me one time, he was like, who would be one of your ultimate gets as a guest on the show? And I was like, man, I really don't know. I mean, obviously there's the obvious like Garth Brooks as far as music goes. But as far as an all around entertainer, if I ever had the opportunity one day to sit down with Chris Jericho and spend five minutes with him,
Speaker: and that would be amazing. Just because, hey, I'm a wrestling fan, I'm a music fan, and he's so good. 70s push on my face, what the hell. To answer the same question, I don't know. I mean, but this is twice you failed me. No, you know who I would actually, you know,
Speaker: I don't know how well it would go over on this podcast. Al Capone. No, I'd love to have somebody like Troy Tapani. And I know you don't know who that is. Troy Tapani, he owns a custom car shop called Rad Rods by Troy. And this is the guy doing that. Rad, R -A -D.
Speaker: Rad Rod's by Torrey. It's out of Michigan, actually. I think he's out of Michigan. But he's won Hot Rod of the Year like nine times. And he doesn't have like the best shop in the world. It's literally like, like, he was the first person to actually do a engine swap with a Viper motor. And he put it in like a an old Merc, old Mercury. You know, you know, the Alan Jackson on Buy Me a Mercury. One of those. Yeah.
Speaker: and build it in a two -car garage and one hot rod of the year. And when they do a hot rod of the year, they count the number of threads sticking out of the bolts so that they all match. So if you got three threads sticking out of one bolt, all your other bolts better have three threads sticking out only. God damn. It's called the Riddler.
Speaker: Well, as I said, this is twice your family tonight, Jeff. How did I fail you? Well, because we just came back from break. So welcome back everybody to nonsense. If you're not already, if you're not already, go ahead and check us out on social media. They'll give us the old thumbing.
Speaker: If you're watching live, you're hanging out in the chatters box, you're having a good time, you like what you hear, feel free to check out every episode on Anchor, Spotify, Google, Google Play, Apple Podcast, pretty much anywhere you get your podcast jobs. As I said, we're on YouTube and Twitch.
Speaker: And, uh, as I said, um, we are looking to get into the, uh, guest game, have a little interview. So if you want to, you know, maybe come on, hit us up with an email at, uh, nonsensical nonsense podcast at gmail .com. I got it in there.
Speaker: You're leading up to it. I was I was I was throwing you the softball that summer I'm just over here putting on my own show my with my Somebody as somebody talking about baby Is she live so much? I don't I don't know She says she's putting on her own show with herself She was just out of town in a hotel for a week and now she's gonna start this nonsense
Speaker: she got it on the ship why she didn't have a hotel too but as as having somebody as a guest that we will both know who i think would be really cool i mean are we talking living or dead we're just our only living uh you know what yeah you know that's a good question you know and this can go both ways uh
Speaker: Well the funny thing is, and this goes back to my love of movies, my wife had never seen The Princess Bride.
Speaker: and they just put it on Netflix down here. What is that? What is that? What is, what is, what is his name? Does anybody want a peanut? No, the other guy. It's conceivable. My, my name is. My name is Anik Bhandoya. You killed my father. You killed my father. But literally, my, I mean, my son and I have, I mean, I've watched that movie, I don't know, more times than any man should watch that movie.
Speaker: But my son also liked it. So he and I have watched it together multiple times. I have it on my phone. I have the full movie on my phone. And then I think we have the Blu -ray of it or the DVD. And it was put on Netflix. And we don't have a DVD player in the bedroom. And my wife has always been like, I don't want to see it. It's an old movie. I said, no, trust me. This is a good movie. And it's very rare that my wife
Speaker: listens to me when it comes to watching a movie. She's like, oh, I want something new. And everyone's watching will be like, okay, fine. So I was like, look, they put the Princess Bride on Netflix. And she's like, fine, whatever. She loved it. Which most movies I recommend her. She's like, oh, it's a really good movie. It is a really good movie. Yeah, it's not one that I've
Speaker: I've only actually seen it a couple of times in my life. It's a really good movie. Billy Crystal is the funniest, funniest I've ever seen. I was busy. What were you doing? I was at work. Um, but, uh, okay. Well, okay. So as Andre, the giant, as far as the dead person, as far as a living person that we both would know, and maybe most of our audience would know, who would you like to sit down and have a little chitchat?
Speaker: Um, you're going to hate me for this Donald J. Trump, sir. I mean, not because he was the president that has, that's because the man knows business like nobody else, you know?
Speaker: So I think that would be interesting. But if I go non -political completely, it would have to be like Kevin Smith. I think that'd be fun. Oh, yeah. That would be a really cool interview. That man will talk us both into a fucking corner, number one.
Speaker: He'll talk us out of house at home, but dirty business. What do you think about dirty business? Some are saying Trump knows dirty business. I think that's what you're saying Well, yeah, that could be the one person on the planet that could shut you the fuck up, right? I think I think man, it's so weird because Like dead for me Good night Michelle. Yeah, she's supposed to be better an hour ago
Speaker: I've had people ask me this question in the past and I really I don't know who I'd want to talk to dead because there's so many people that I would want to sit down and talk to but I think I think if I was I think if it was if I was given the choice somebody who was dead that I could sit down and spend
Speaker: five, 10 minutes with, it would be a toss up between, and this is just me being a nerd, between like Wyatt Earp, Doc Holliday, Billy the Kid, or, uh, wow, Bill Hickok. Okay. Because I'm a nerd and I love history and that is one of my favorite time periods. I didn't even think about something like that. Yeah.
Speaker: I was, I would love to just like celebrities, you know, and, and not that they are not celebrities, but celebrities as in like movies and shit, you know, but just not only just sit down and, and, and, and get into their, get into their brain, but just to be, just to know what it was really like back then. Right. Yeah. How, how much.
Speaker: Their quote -unquote celebrity has been You know how Hollywooded you know how much They ever say I'm your huckleberry kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah. Well in all honesty in all honesty that was a misquote and Valcomer Fucked up the line in that movie. Oh really actual line is
Speaker: I think it's, um, Oh shit. I need to, I need to, uh, I'm going to look it up. It's, it's, um, yeah. I would totally, I can totally see sitting down with Billy the kid. That'd be cool. But you know, even, even to just sit around and play poker with those guys would be cool too. You know, and that's like, I have a beer or whatever, because
Speaker: Their beer was mostly whiskey, but like sit around and play poker with them. It's just a single handed. I'll drink whiskey with them. Oh yeah, you would. I'd pass out. I'm done. You know, but who would be your living though? That we both know. I mean, I know you said Jericho, but as a living person that we both know or slash admire or whatever.
Speaker: I would like to end this again. I'm trying to look up what the hell this is.
Speaker: Okay, so the line that Val Kilmer was supposed to say, and I wanted to make sure I was right before I said this, I thought this is what it was, the actual line that Doc Holliday was supposed to say to Ringo in Wyatt Earp or Tombstone was, I'm your Hucklebearer. Oh yeah, because Hucklebearer was basically the person that carried the
Speaker: Yeah, they carried the coffin. Yeah, they carried the coffin. Yeah. And he messed up, but they were like, Hey, it worked. You know, it sounded, it sounded good. And it's, it has become an iconic line. Um, as far as the handle on the side of the coffin, as far as, as far as somebody alive that I would love to sit down with and
Speaker: and have a chitchat with. Again, this follows into my, you know, where I'm most comfortable with. Right. As we all know, I'm a huge football fan. I'm a huge sports fan.
Speaker: He's dead. But if I, I'd have a conversation with him. All right. But the five fingers say that on the face. No, it would be Jim Brown, Cleveland Browns, one of the, the man in Cleveland, one of the best running backs to ever play in Cleveland would be Jim Brown. I would love to sit down and talk to that man. All right. Let me, let me make a phone call and I'll get him on the line.
Speaker: Oh, OK. And there's a meme going out. There's a meme going around that somebody made. And it shows Jim Brown looking down to Nick Chubb. And Nick Chubb's the current running back for the Cleveland Browns. And he's a monster. He's a little man.
Speaker: Um, and, and, and the me or the picture says it has Jim Brown saying no mercy and Nick Chubb looking up saying, yes, sir. And I'll just, if that isn't like, Oh man, that's hype right there. Because I really do feel like, and most Cleveland Browns feel like Nick Chubb is the second coming.
Speaker: Jim Brown for Cleveland Browns fans. So yeah, I would love to sit down and talk to Jim Brown Not only because I'm a Cleveland Browns fan just because I would love to pick his brain because he's been around He's been around for years. He's an older man or an older gentleman and You know, he's he's been through some shit. He was in the league in an era You know and
Speaker: where as a black man, you know, it would be cool to talk to him and get his insight on what it was like for him back then. And even though he's so beloved and he's essentially a national treasure in Cleveland, I'm sure there was difficulties for him. Well, I mean, you look at somebody like, what's the guy?
Speaker: I just saw that movie, but the first black Jackie Robinson, Jackie Robinson. Yeah, that's the man. Yeah. You know, I mean, I, I saw that movie where, where, uh, the owner of the team is played by Harrison Ford. Yeah. It's called 42 or something like that. Fucking good movie. So good. And like, I'm not, I'm not the first person to watch a sports movie unless it's a comedy, like, uh, what's a fucking, uh,
Speaker: I'm not the first person to watch a sports movie, but you love Draft Day. You love breaking the curve or whatever the hell it's called. Trouble with the curve. You like Moneyball. A historical, accurate movie like 42. I bet you love the League of their own. I love that fucking movie. Tom Hanks is a fucking national treasure. I don't care what everybody says. Hey Madonna's gorgeous in that movie.
Speaker: and the chick that played her sister, the chick that played her sister, she did a movie called Tank Girl. She was gorgeous in that movie. Terrible movie. It's based on a comic book, but a terrible movie, but she looked amazing. But yeah, I mean, uh,
Speaker: as a sports figure to have on the podcast. I think Jackie Robinson would be cool. Yeah, Jackie Robinson would be cool. But, you know, just, you know, who would really be an amazing sports figure to have on the podcast. Obviously a dead one, but Babe fucking Ruth. Dude, did you imagine how drunk Babe and I would get together?
Speaker: the the
Speaker: I think the problem is the fact that I don't know shit about baseball except for that you hit the ball. I'm getting out of here. That would be much like if you know Doc Holliday and I were to sit down and have a conversation it would turn into who can drink the most.
Speaker: Calm down, longer. We would rub him the wrong way, I'm sure we would. And he'd be like, you guys are sick. I'm going to gunfight you. Like, wait, what? You would rub him the wrong way. Slides a pistol across the tables, like, take this, take 10 paces. Boom! What? Touchdown. Yeah. You'd rub him the wrong way and shoot the goddamn computer screen. How'd he get in that box? Jeff, a doctor shot you in the face.
Speaker: You know who an actor would be really cool alive to have on the podcast? Would be Michael J. Fox. Absolutely. You want to talk about national fucking treasure. I've seen. Speaking. Speaking. Michael J. Fox.
Speaker: Did you see the meme going around? I see the meme, I see the meme. They're all over the pictures, I finally got Michael J. Fox's photograph. No, they said, they said, it was, it was a picture of Michael J. Fox and he said, hey girl, I heard your vibrator, fighter, he's died. Let me hold that for you. Oh, that's fucked up. No, the funniest one is I got, you know, the
Speaker: the one shots that they do for for like actors and it's you know where you go and you get assigned or whatever it's one like that but it's got pen mark all over it like this and it's like I finally got Michael J Fox on the graph and I was like oh that's fucked up yeah well we'll never have Michael J Fox on the podcast after this so
Speaker: It was terrible. I mean, don't be wrong. I laughed, but I was like, fuck. I felt bad. I don't, I don't, I don't ever feel bad about things like that. Well, there's Jeff's favorite part of a football game cheerleaders halftime. They were like zoom. They were, they were zoomed in real close on the cheerleaders too. I'm like, I can see what you ate for lunch. Yeah.
Speaker: Oh my gosh. I have a little story for you. I have a little fucked up news for you. Oh, go ahead. I got something that happened to you during, or something that happened to me during our last break after you get in with your story. Well, um, okay. Down here at the corner where I go get cigarettes and beer and whatever. It's called, it's called the six, right? It's the beer store.
Speaker: It floods when it rains too much. Okay. And this is, this is a tragic story, dude. I'm not fucking, this is no joke. This actually happened today. No, it flooded that area. Now the, the six is actually up a set of steps. It's well off the water level, but the problem is the electrical lines go from the pole to underground to feed our neighborhood.
Speaker: Well, it was flooded and there was a short and a lady and her daughter walked into the water and got all now died. And the fucked up thought is, is I was literally getting ready to leave to go get cigarettes. And my wife got the story sent to her and she went, get him from the guy with the store close by.
Speaker: Yeah, I called a guy over here that literally is less than a block away. It's like it's literally two gates away. It was like your neighbor or whatever that has. He's got his little store in his house. I sent him a message on the phone and he meets me at his gate. But I was literally getting ready to wade through said water because it rained all day yesterday and all day today, mostly.
Speaker: Like to the point where my wife, she woke up and it was still raining. I was like, yeah, I don't even get up. Go back to bed. You're not going to work today because... Because they can't get through the water. Ah, gotcha. I was going to say, what the... Why didn't she go to work just because it was raining? She sells tourist packages. The thing is, is like her stepdad comes, picks her up on the bike, on the motorcycle and takes her to the main Walmart.
Speaker: Well, he comes in right where that water is. And the only other way to get to get a cab is to go instead of actually turning left, you actually turn right and go to a main a back road and stand in the fucking rain and hopefully flag. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Does he does he come pick her up and take her to work or does he come pick her up and take her? He takes her to the bank bus stop. Why does he just fucking take her to work?
Speaker: Because it would be out of his way. Because he actually has to go to work too. Oh, so he's picking her up on his way to work or something? Right. Well, he drives a taxi. And where he drops her off, two blocks away is where he picks up the taxi because him and his son share a taxi. Didn't you say he's a former cop or a retired cop? He's a former. He's a retired cop too.
Speaker: Okay, so he just does this just for something. He does for extra cash. Yeah. And, you know, so he he obviously didn't come this morning. And fuck, you know, it was like getting around noon. And I was like, Oh, shit, I'm almost out of cigarettes. I'm gonna go get cigarettes. And literally, just as I'm ready to open the door, had my backpack on, you know, almost, you know, put on something that I wouldn't get all wet, like I have a
Speaker: Uh, like a blazer, like, you know, the plastic jackets, I threw it on and so I could get to the store and back, not be soaked. And I literally opened the door and she goes, she screams down from the bed to wait. You're not going anywhere. And the video that was literally people trying to find the drain to clean the drain out, they, you know, it sticks in the water, get into the drain, clean out the drain.
Speaker: So I was like, Oh, that's fucked up. Yeah. Yeah. It was, it was creepy. They didn't say how old the lady in the daughter was. I know. Sorry. But yeah, what a way to bring it down though. Fucked up news.
Speaker: How do we how do we how do we go back to dick Yeah, yeah, it's been a 15 year old how he likes duck dick in his mouth 15 year old I'm sticking duck dick in his mouth, huh?
Speaker: No, I didn't say I was sticking a duck dick in his mouth by asking how he liked duck dick in his mouth.
Speaker: once again. That's that's that's a ice breaker. That's a hell of an ice breaker at the bar. You walk up to the bar. Yeah, I'm going to go up to somebody. I'm like, hey, how do you like a duck to your mouth? Walk up to the chicken. Are you single? Are you single, gentlemen? Are you single fellas out there that's listening to this? When you're at the bar next weekend, walk up to the chicken. Say, uh, so one time I asked a 15 year old, how he liked that pick in his mouth.
Speaker: and uh you will have her full fucking attention no so so um it's no big secret obviously anybody who's watching the live uh any you know anybody who's ever watched the live i'm a michigan fan i live in ohio
Speaker: Um, you know, it's not necessarily the greatest thing in the world, but you know, it is what it is. So I went out, you know, we, we was on break and I went out to fry some chicken and whatnot. And as I was coming back, I, because I like to do to my daughters, um, I kick their bedroom door and just stare at them for a second. And then I walk away.
Speaker: No, no, no, not necessarily a conversation. I would have my daughter, but okay.
Speaker: No, so I did that. I like, I kicked the door and I just stared at him and then I went to walk away. Well, my oldest one, she's on a phone with one of our friends from school and she was like, uh, what the hell do you know what the fuck his name is? He's, he's got some douchey name. She was like, ah, someone, uh, someone said, uh, Michigan sucks. And I was like, oh, did he really? So I was like,
Speaker: I was like, that's awful big talk for considering Ohio State got got beat down today by Oregon. And she's like, oh, he can't hear you. And I was like, well, fucking tell him to listen to what I'm saying. So she called him to unmute his mic or whatever.
Speaker: And he started to say something. And I was like, I know you ain't talking shit because Oregon just beat Ohio State's ass today. And then she was like, he said Michigan sucks. And I was like, yeah, we'll ask him how to duck dick in his mouth. And then I started to walk out of the room. And both girls were like, oh. And he said something. I said, don't play with me, kid. I've been in this game for a long fucking time. It would not have surprised me if all the phone goes silent and your daughters just stare at you like,
Speaker: What? Yeah, they probably didn't understand. But I was just like, don't fucking play with me, kid. You are barking up the wrong tree. I will fucking roast the shit out of you. I will make you cry yourself to sleep tonight, especially if you want to talk football, especially when your team lost and my team is currently winning. Duck dick in your mouth. I can just see this kid on the other side of the phone going, wait, what?
Speaker: he's just thinking about it well because organ that's one of those time bombs you drop in somebody's brain we're like midnight they're like motherfucker he's gonna wake up at the middle of the night going son of a bitch god damn you austin's dad now i'm in therapy it's austin's dad's fault i've never had a ductic in my mouth
Speaker: I'm kind of curious about it, but there's porn sites for that man. Yeah. What's up brother? It's a college football thing, man. Oregon ducks played the highest state Buckeyes. They, they beat him pretty easily tonight. I assumed that was what
Speaker: Oregon had as their mascot, but yeah, when you say Oregon ducks, I was like, yeah, don't, don't, don't, yeah. Like I said, don't, don't play with me when it comes to sports, because Hey, I'll, I'll worst the shit out of you. I don't really give a damn just in general, but when it comes to sports, you know, I'm a Michigan fan living in Ohio. I've been, I've been fighting this battle my whole life. Amen to that. And on a day that Ohio state loses.
Speaker: don't play. Ohio State's one and one and Michigan's a two and 0. And Ohio State was a highly favorited team to win the, to be in the college playoffs, not necessarily win the national championship, but to be in the playoffs. Now their playoff chances are, well, if you finally stumbles in three hours later, fucking pops.
Speaker: Oh yeah, you're a bit late there. Dude, speaking of pops, I gotta go find some chicken real quick. Jeff, feel free to rant. Yeah, well, thanks. Think about seducting, Jeff. Yeah, good lord. I'm just, I'm gonna have that image stuck in my head for the rest of my life. What? What? Take it. What? It's right here.
Speaker: I just, I just, my daughter's in that and take it, go. My daughter's in here asking for a fan. The fact that you literally told a 15 year old, I mean, you might have to be put on a watch list or something.
Speaker: I don't need to be put on a watch or something. I couldn't even go fried chicken. So I just went to go to the back. I went to go. Oh, now I'm going to go fried chicken. I went to go fried chicken and one of the girls was in the bathroom. I swear, I'll talk. I went to go to the bathroom and Austin was yelling out of her bedroom. I think that's his name. She was like, Maggie, Kate misses you. And I was like, what old duck dick breath?
Speaker: It's going to be on the internet for like three hours going, duck dick in my mouth. What the fuck? I don't get to my friends. Summer said she swears. Summer says she swear we talk more than women. Now I'm going to go find some chicken. That's messed up, Summer. That's me. Oh, speaking of talking, Wednesday. Oh, you're tackling things?
Speaker: oh my god dude three o 'clock in the morning almost four I was up downstairs playing Rocket League and I was out of cigarettes and the store was closed how frustrated was I however the new the new you gotta download that Rocket League dude you gotta get that that new football game on Rocket League I fucking had such a blast playing yesterday
Speaker: I'm not a big on that, on those games, but holy shit. I still can't figure out how to throw the ball. Hey, what you need to do, you know, what needs to happen is, is, uh, discuss how much we care, Jeff. Jeff, what you need to do is ask your wife to buy you, uh, Black Ops, Cold War, and then come play Cold War with me and Kamri. Yeah, you know, the problem with - You don't even have to be good.
Speaker: Problem with games like that. It's I'll be on there all the time and nothing will get done That's fine That's fine. Get on there and come in and hang out because it's a cross -platform game. Yeah. Well the I'm literally just getting the house reorganized from the the great build of the kitchen the great build of 2021 how much like the pops pops and joe world tour 21
Speaker: Yeah. So was your, was your wife and her friend, were they fighting until three o 'clock in the morning? Or did you say world war three? Well, I literally at one point, you know, before they started talking, I was upstairs and we had finished the podcast and I'd come upstairs and
Speaker: They were like, hey, can you cook us this? I said, well, send me on Messenger everything you want in English so I can write it and I'll fucking cook it. So I go downstairs and I'm waiting, and I'm waiting, and I'm waiting, and I'm still not getting a message. Fully charged battery on my phone. So I start to come up the stairs, ask what the fuck, and I hear screaming, because they're arguing. Oh, that's because they were taking each other downtown.
Speaker: Yeah, well, no, they were scissoring. No, what happened is, it was apparently a game of telephone happened between friends where it was like, someone said this, then someone said this, and this person's doing selfish lie and blah, blah, blah. Well, that's usually how it goes. Yeah.
Speaker: And I said, see, this is why I don't have friends. This is why my only friend lives, lives 6 ,000 miles away. Yeah. And like I said, on Wednesday, you and I've had those arguments, you know, back in the day, I fucking throw bricks at each other.
Speaker: Yeah. And, and that's the difference right now between us and them and all that bullshit. You know, if I, if I have an issue with you and, you know, and we've, we've had issues with this podcast and I just flat out tell you, look, man, you gotta start pulling your own fucking weight or, you know, or, or much like Wednesday, I tell you, you're going to start doing the top five. Yeah.
Speaker: We're at that age where if we have an issue, we just say, this is the issue. Let's get it out on the fucking table. Well, they're in their 20s. You know, they're, you know, my wife is 27. So 28. So it, it's a whole different dynamic back in, you know, when we were in our 20s. So. Well, I mean, some are, some are only 30. She's not on that bullshit either with, with people.
Speaker: But they, they had, they just needed to be basically locked in a room to hash this whole thing out. So the problem was when we finished the podcast, I was out of cigarettes. The last 10 minutes of the broadcast, I'm out of cigarettes. Well, yeah. Cause you went in the house after, after, after a break or some shit like that. Yeah. Which is because I was out of cigarettes. So I was like, I'm not going to smoke. So, uh, so the second half of the podcast, I'm out of cigarettes.
Speaker: And I was like, oh, no big deal. I'm going to go to bed soon. And then in the morning, I'll wake up and get cigarettes. And when they first started arguing, I was like, OK, I'll give them 20 minutes and I'll go tell them I'm going to go to the store.
Speaker: And 20 minutes turned into 40, and next thing, no, it's 3 o 'clock in the morning. And I was dying for a cigarette. I was edgy because I didn't have a cigarette. Five hours later, I'm so pissed off because I don't have a cigarette, so my nicotine fit going in. I'm grinding my teeth. And I'm like, can somebody fucking move or something so I can just go to bed? Yeah. Can y 'all stop scissoring for fucking five minutes so I can go to bed?
Speaker: But so they finally hashed everything out. They finished, like I said, about 3, 3, 4 o 'clock. And it took me about five minutes and I fell asleep after everything left. But the next morning, the first thing I did was jump up and run to the store. Well, basically, the moral of that story and what I got from that story is the fact that you don't know how to prepare properly.
Speaker: Well, you know, the thing is, is like, um, I had planned to go to the store and then I got caught up with doing one thing or making dinner or whatever. I literally looked down and I was like, Oh, I got, I got enough for the podcast. And usually after the podcast, we're usually done so late that I'm like, fuck it. I'll go to bed. And halfway through the podcast, when my wife called on the phone, she's like, Hey, we're coming over to hash it out. And I was like,
Speaker: Speaking of redoing the house, Pops and, Pops and Joe are getting ready to, uh, I think their house goes on the market, um, next weekend. They just re did the, they just, there are, they are in the process of redoing the bathroom upstairs bathroom. Oh, yeah. And it, and it looks much like the one in the basement, the one where I have to duck to walk into the doorway with all the wooden stuff. Fucking shit looks amazing.
Speaker: Yeah. So today I went over there because, you know, I had to go over there and get my sweet ass all that I got. Yeah. I sent you the picture. I got like every Reba CD known to mankind and pops up with a bunch of blood wiser hats. The one Budweiser. So, so pops texted me the other day and he was like, Hey, cause he used to, he used to drive for, he used to, he used to work for Budweiser. We used to deliver Budweiser.
Speaker: So we always got all these really cool Budweiser hats. But the one that he had in the picture that I wanted, and Joanne just told me to take all of them. He was like, just pick the ones you want. And Jeremy was like, just fucking take them all. I was like, okay. Budweiser hats, I'll take them all. I don't give a damn.
Speaker: But the one I really wanted was an old school football one with the, you remember the old school Bud Light label that was like, it was a silver label and it had the red outline. Yeah, it looked like a neon light, but it was a football one. Yeah, but it was a football one and the emblems were on the helmets and stuff. Nice.
Speaker: That was what I wanted. So I went over there today, and my baby sister was over there, and she was helping Joe paint the garage door and do some other painting and whatnot. And, you know, Joe was like, oh, the CDs are in there on the counter, they're in a bag.
Speaker: uh your dad has the hat somewhere just ask him where they're at he was in there doing some other dumb shit making a mess basically is what he was doing but uh yeah he probably he probably did yeah he's got it he just didn't want to let you see it because you know he's losing yeah that's okay i got some really cool Budweiser hats so i'm okay with it but um uh
Speaker: but Joe is like go look at the bathroom and I was like all right because they've done a lot of work to the house and the house looks really good and and I would like to buy the house I love the house the only difference the only the bad thing is is that I'm trying to get into Johnstown for the kids um where they go to school at but um
Speaker: So they did the upstairs bathroom, just like the downstairs bathroom. And I go in there to look, and I hit the light switches, and nothing comes on. And I'm like, what the fuck? So I turn my light on my phone. And they've still got the bathroom torn apart, so there's no sink or toilet, or there's no lights in there. And I was like, I would love to look at the fucking bathroom, Dad. But there's no fucking lights in here. And he was like, yeah, I know.
Speaker: Sorry, I had to use my flashlight, but it does it man. It looks really fucking good with tongue and groove Shiplap was where overlaps
Speaker: yeah i don't know i don't know what they did i didn't ask them i just thought it looked cool you see you didn't you could take building trades i know we didn't they had no lights there it was dark i only had i only had the light from my fucking phone so i could just go oh yeah it looks really cool it's not like i walked in there
Speaker: It's not like I walked in there like a fucking building inspector and I was like, well, there's this piece of water. Oh, the the plans say that this should be redwood and not only is it not redwood, but it's also an 18th of an inch off. So scrap it and start again, son of a bitches. This is supposed to be this is supposed to be
Speaker: ship lap and it's a what the fuck I was talking oh here we go well picture or Joseph me a picture oh yes now they have lights in it oh it looks really good it does I like it well I was talking my mom and my grandfather built them out of cherry
Speaker: Yeah. And they're fucking gorgeous, right? And I've always loved them. And I was asking my mom today, I said, hey, ask dad what those cabinets are made out of. Because I couldn't picture them on my head. I just remember them being reddish. She's like, oh, it's cherry. I know that. Apparently, they just redid them again. And I was like, oh. I just sent you the pictures. Not that you can see them right now. But the bathroom looks really good. It's tongue and groove.
Speaker: Okay, perfect. I like the tongue and groove. Well, you know how it looks when a house is built by lesbians. There's all, it's all fun and groove and there's not a stud in the joint. Cause they got dick, they got duck dick breath. It's all tongue and groove and there's no studs.
Speaker: But that's what they call the, the, the masculine lesbians. So they call him butch. What? No, they call him starts now. She said the, the sherry. I called my wood guy here and I said, you got a, you got a wood guy, Jeff. I got a, I got a, I got a lumber yard on, on speed dial.
Speaker: And I call I asked the guys and how much for cherry and he's like you don't have enough money He's like you say it like that Because a we only carry it when it's ordered which means it's gonna cost you double and B it's like
Speaker: It's like $250 a sheet. And I was like, you know, I'm good. I'm good. Because yeah, I originally used the original doors. And I'm going to put in spacers in between the doors because doors aren't big enough. And I couldn't convince my wife to go give me a board structure. So
Speaker: So later on the board stretcher was right next right next to the dick stretcher and she would have gladly wouldn't got it right next to the blinker stretcher But I'm gonna wait and Save up money and I'll redo the drawer drawer fronts and the doors Make the doors bigger
Speaker: but I got everything hung up and it looks great. I just, I gotta save up for paint and new doors. Paint will be first. I told Pops and Joe that I would give them, I'd give them 150 cash for the house and they can walk away from it. 150 bucks. No, $1 .50.
Speaker: 150 bucks. What do I look like? Donald Trump? You think I made a money? Somebody sells something. I'm like, I got a quarter. I'll take it. I'll give you 50 cents. They're like 50 cents. That and that and another 50 cents can be a cup of coffee. That's right. Well, enjoy a cup of coffee. I can't fucking talk. Jesus Christ. I'm gonna fry some chicken.
Speaker: I'm gonna go fry some chicken. If I could get that fucking out, that would be amazing. Go enjoy your cup of Joe. That's what I was. Jesus Christ, Lord Almighty. Wow, man. I'll tell you what. I'm sitting here enjoying this Michigan game, enjoying this win. It's not over yet. There's still six minutes left in the game, but we're up 24 to 10 and I think we've got our third string defense in there and they're still playing pretty good.
Speaker: You know, I'm just sitting here enjoying this drink and some beard and thinking about tomorrow. God damn Cleveland Browns, baby. It's Jersey season. I love when I can break my jerseys out and wear them without people looking at me like I'm a fucking weirdo. Got dressed here. Just gotta wear my. Shut up, Dick.
Speaker: fuck you man i hurt my feelings earlier we were stuck in shit i am so far i ain't never asked you guys for money i've only i've only accepted your offer what's that pops in here busting my balls
Speaker: Whoa. Holy shit. Summer just sent me an intent or sent me an article that said, um, male giraffes will headbutt female giraffes in the bladder until they pee. And then they will drink the urine, drink the urine, urine, urine testing it to determine whether the female is ovulating. So I'm going to headbutt you with your blood. That I don't want to be coming back as a giraffe.
Speaker: No, you don't get me wrong. You want to come back as a 15 year old with a ductic breath. Takes my pain, takes my pain. I'll be late and I'm about to impregnate that ass. Did I send you the video? I think I sent it to my wife, but I don't know if I sent it to you or the guy on TikTok. He's his damn social media.
Speaker: you something like that he's like here I am six o 'clock in the morning higher than giraffe pussy wearing a child's Batman mask I've never heard anybody say I'm a higher than giraffe pussy
Speaker: I've actually heard that before but I also have had a lot of friends that are raging stoners so I've heard that. I saw that I had to send in my wife because she's got a bunch of stoner friends. I was like wait what?
Speaker: summer summer so as i said pops is in here busted my balls he said that uh i told him i'd give him a dollar fifty for the house he said you probably want us to loan you the money summer shot he talked shit because he's no he he knows he's grounded and he's not allowed to leave the house to come over here
Speaker: I saw shit out of him with one of his one of those Budweiser hats he gave me today. We was talking, we was over at the house pillar today. And when I was getting ready to leave Pops was like, Hey, Joe, can I go over and drink beer with Christopher tonight? And she was like, no. Is the bathroom done, Scott? I was like, you know where I live, Pops? I still got moonshine on the fridge and we got walked out mojo on demand.
Speaker: He did, he did, he did introduce me to a speaking of music. He did introduce me to
Speaker: to a band that's local to Ohio, that's actually pretty good. He's like, you guys should reach out to him and see if you can get him on the podcast. There you go. Maybe I will. But as I told him, I said, that's where a studio would be nice because instead of trying to do the whole HAPS thing, this and the other thing, I could just invite him to the studio. Well, that's like I'm getting ready to start Garage, a shop talk.
Speaker: And my brother, who is older than you and I, I was like, well, yeah. Well, yeah. I think my brother's 15 years older than me, something like that. But I was like, yeah, download Haps. And he downloaded, and he's like, how do I find you? I was like, oh, Jesus Christ. I was like, send me your, send me your, the name it's under. He's like, it's my name. I was like, Jesus Christ, you can't think of anything.
Speaker: I said, look, mine's underneath the introductions, blah, blah, blah. And he goes, I think I'm falling. I don't know. I said, I just got your message. Before we do this, let me figure this thing out. Let me play with it a couple of little bit. I said, well, one of these days I'll send you an invite. We'll shoot the shit for a few minutes live so you can get used to it and all that fun stuff. Yeah. So I got to wait for Brad to download it.
Speaker: on the whole giraffe peep and summer said taste my pee somebody's into golden showers yeah that's gross you know i'm not tasting your pee summer just so you know and know i'll do a lot of things in sex and i would do anything for you if you piss on me i'm gonna kick you the fuck out my bed
Speaker: I'm gonna punch you in your fucking throat, just so you know. Right? Right? I mean, that's just fucked up. I - I watched... Okay, is this - is this one of your accent - is this one of your accent - dental porn adventures? I was watching porn the other night.
Speaker: Because, you know, as one does, and this one does this, this dude's going to town and this chick's ass and not he just without even thinking about it, he takes it out of rashes. She turns around real quick and shoves it in her mouth. And I was like, that's fucked up. That's called ATM, my friend. I know, but ATM is something I'm, I mean, it would, I'd be like, look, I'm done.
Speaker: I know you're the one sucking my cock right now, but two minutes later, he's kissing her. And I'm like, Oh, well, that's a, I was just like, Oh, I'm out. I'm done. And, and you say, are you saying we won't regular porn for you?
Speaker: I don't know what regular point is. Are you saying that you won't eat the booty?
Speaker: You will stick your tongue in your wife's fart box, but you will not let her kiss you after you've stuck your pecker in her ass, and then you stuck it in her mouth, and you're like, I'm not gonna let you kiss me, but you'll tongue punch her fart box. No, no. A, she won't let me. That's what I said. That's what I said. And B, I don't go inside. It's just around the rim. She doesn't like it.
Speaker: She says it feels weird. No, I'm going to fart in your mouth. You've got it backwards. Another reason, another way to get throat punched by me. Wow. This, this sounds like after show talk to no honesty. But I mean, it's like, um, regular. Hey, hey, Johnny Bravo. I'm going to calm down and put your hair down. You're like, you're like spiking it up.
Speaker: I don't know what, I don't know what, I don't know what the term regular porn is. Okay, I'm talking about, I'm talking about just plain, you know, like 80s style, you know, just like him in. I don't watch, I don't watch porn unless it involves midgets, amputees, and some kind of random ass animal entering in the conversation.
Speaker: There's a chick on TikTok. I'm just kidding. I don't watch animal porn. Calm down. There's a chick on TikTok. I'm on Discovery Channel. Called Tiny Texie. This chick is three foot tall. She has an OnlyFans. Of course she does. And she's, she's just, she's literally, she has like a five year old daughter that's taller than her.
Speaker: I was gonna say, isn't that the little stripper chick on TikTok that's got a daughter bigger than her? Yeah. She's literally like, she looks like she's 10. And I'm like, look, I'm all in for OnlyFans. If that's what you want to do, go for it. But that chick does not look of age at all. Calm down. Some are saying about my karma.
Speaker: summer said about my comment that sounds about right that she just doesn't do it for me anymore. Trust me more than do it for me. I'm not I do not want to venture or and or explore too much of Jeff's
Speaker: history, especially since this is the guy who accidentally clicked on the, not that there's anything wrong with this, but accidentally clicked on the gay only, and then was just watching a bunch of trannies rail dudes and thought it was normal. It happens, you know, but, uh,
Speaker: The one, the one porn I don't get. The one porn I don't get that people get off to is anime porn. No, I'm just talking like, like a cartoon of Scooby Doo and Shaggy and Vilma just going at it. Cartoon. They're Jeff Somerset in all caps.
Speaker: just saying well i mean there's worse things that you can look at oh don't be wrong sure there is but who doesn't want to watch who doesn't want to watch uh lois and lois griffin and uh uh barge simpson go go to pound town on each other
Speaker: I've seen that video. I was just throwing some random. I was just literally just throwing shit at the wall. The other day I was literally going through the page and I was like, you know what? You know what? What the fuck? You know what? I'm going to go ahead and end this. I'm going to end this on the high note and we can take this into the actual show. Because we've already gotten in trouble. We've already gotten in trouble on Facebook.
Speaker: Oh my god. Yeah, no, not this. We're playing Alan Jackson of all things. On 9 -11, playing Alan Jackson. It looks like you sons of bitches. So, I'm gonna go fry some chicken, grab a couple beers. Hey Pops, what do you pop? Oh, we're gonna let Pops. Where is Pops? We're not gonna be on Facebook. Pops, here you go. This one's for you because... Summer said, we are nasty.
Speaker: we got uh we got black dot mojo in color jamie johnson cover in the air tonight uh in the air tonight in the air tonight prodigal it won't last uh uh dreams flea wood mac cover can't sleep tail lights underneath wicked woman you know i love that what you want pops i know you do pops loves that song too
Speaker: I told pops what you said about cats woman too and he was like, well, I mean, I have so much in common. We can read each other's thoughts. That's a good looking woman. I'll take the assbeat to say it. I would probably punch you in the face too. If God asked me, he was like, Hey, look, we're going to, we're going to jump Jeff. Are you in? Let's fucking beat him down. Let's beat him down. Let's, let's beat the break. All I ask is a screenshot of her.
Speaker: Pops wants to hear in the air tonight. There you go. I don't think she has any. Oh, God, that's not it. That's not it. That's, uh, oh, God. Oh, God. Pops, Pops, we were talking about, and of course Pops and I were talking about, oh, my God, what am I doing? Oh, God. Oh, God.
Speaker: pops is like that, that wicked woman video. He said that he loves the part where the guys in the van with the shotgun.
Speaker: You know, I think the best part of that video is when the guy's in there, he's like, you got any weapons? It's a fucking sickle. God, I'll hear this. There we go. All right. So we're going to end the show. We're going to come back for some after show because. Apparently we have some issues that we've got to work through and Jeff's porn. Oh.
Speaker: Yeah, Jeff's, Jeff's. Porn addiction. Porn addiction, porn addiction, porn interest. No, I didn't bring up porn with that story. Summer, that's Summer's fault. No, there you go. I do want to ask you about your porn addiction since, since, since your life lives.
Speaker: Yeah, I do want to ask you about that since since your wife lives with you and you guys see each other on a Daily basis and whatnot, but anywho Appreciate you guys hanging out with us hanging out with us tonight as always If you're not already Go ahead and check us out on social media Instagram Facebook Twitter YouTube Twitch
Speaker: uh all that nonsensical nonsense fuck tiktok we're on tiktok but fuck tiktok yeah uh go ahead and go give us a a follow a like a little thumbing as we learned recently jeff is into the thumbing um also if uh if you've stopped doing that oh god don't spit on it shoot me like the dirty whore that i am says jeff
Speaker: If you tuned in to the live and you'd like to be part of this and you want to check out the rest of our bullshit, go ahead, check us out on Anchor, Spotify, Google and Apple or anywhere you get your podcast.
Speaker: Also Not that anybody would ever be interested to be in a guest on this show and how we roped rocky into being a guest on this But if you just on this show feel free to email us at what's our email?
Speaker: Just send us an email and say, treat me like the dirty whore that I am. Like a Tuesday or a Monday. Also, I'm like, what the fuck? Oh, God, got me. The subject of the email is, treat me like the dirty whore that I am. You're like, oh, I got to open this. It's just so much more.
Speaker: And as always, shout out a huge thank you to Black Dot Mojo for allowing these two idiots to use their music on our Bullshit S podcast. Go follow those guys everywhere on social media and anywhere you get music at Black Dot Mojo and tell them that nonsensical nonsense sent you that way we can confuse the shit out of Matt.
Speaker: Close the show out for pops request. A little in here tonight by blacktop acoustic cover in a distillery somewhere in Texas. And we'll be right back.
Speaker: With an after show. What's up everybody? We're here in Trinity River to steal the rig. Beautiful Fort Worth, Texas. We had to come pick old cat and murder stuff. We decided to slip on over here and hang out with our buddies. It's actually the master to steal it right here.
Speaker: I'm out of company. We brought a special bottle. We got a special bottle. So if you look up here, the ceiling is about 3 ,000 feet high. It's an old ranch style bean factory.
Speaker: So it's got some good natural reverb, so we decided we'd come down here and we'd do a little song for you guys. All right. We'll try it out. Let's see what y 'all got. You act like you're professionals or something. We're not. Far from over. Like and feel it coming the other night. Oh, love.
Speaker: And I've been waiting for this moment for all of my life Oh Lord Can you feel it coming in the air tonight? Oh Lord, oh Lord
Speaker: Well, if you told me you were drowning How in our land does any I've seen your face before, my friend But I don't know if you know who I am
Speaker: Well I was there and I saw what you did. I saw it with my own two eyes. So you can wipe off a grin. No way you've been. It's all been a pack of lies.
Speaker: I can feel it coming in the air tonight. Hold on. I've been waiting for this moment all my life. Hold on. Hold on.
Speaker: Nice. Last time.
Speaker: Well, I know the reasons why you keep your silence shut. No, you don't find me. And if good doesn't show, show me the easy rules. You know straight after you and me. I can't wait to come to see you every night.
Speaker: I've been waiting for this moment all my life Oh, love Can you feel it coming in the air tonight Oh, love
Speaker: Any last words? Drink.
Speaker: Texas Silver Star Whiskey.
