Transcript
Speaker: 🎵
Speaker: Yes!
Speaker: Whoa What's going on everybody? Happy frickin Monday Hopefully you guys have a good Monday structure week out Hopefully nothing too crazy
Speaker: nice low -key quiet Monday to get your week started. Anywho, welcome to Nonsense Will Nonsense, everybody. I'm Gligg. I'll be probably doing this solo tonight, probably do a short show. We'll see how far, how much we get into it, but it sounds, it's looking like I'm gonna be riding solo. Anywho, anywho,
Speaker: If you're not already good, check out, not since we're done since podcast, uh, on all the social medias, Facebook, Instagram X and tick tock. We are there. You can also join us live and hang out with this every Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday from, uh, all right. Uh, 7 PM ish Eastern time.
Speaker: get in the chatters box, shoot shit with us, all that fun jazz. And you can also listen to us anytime, any place, wherever you listen to podcasts at, all at nonsensical nonsense podcast, or you can simply jump on over to bio .link slash nonsensical nonsense. All those links are going to be there, including links to our sponsors as well. So you can check them out if you'd like and make sure you use our promo code, words are hard.
Speaker: In the in the dish in the you know, check out the promo code box You know what I mean and put it in the box Peeped it in the box Bro shit, what's going on mark? How you doing, man? What's going on with you buddy, oh Man anyhow, let's uh
Speaker: Hopefully you guys had a good weekend. We had an awesome time on Saturday night show. If you missed that, check out the replay. It is up on YouTube and on our Facebook page, I believe. But we had an awesome time. We had a lot of guests pop up. Mark and Brian were there from talking shit. Steve Jarvis popped in.
Speaker: And, uh, you know, later in the night, uh, Tony was there like he popped in, uh, Mike popped into our big doll. We had like a little nonsensical nonsense type reunion. I'm still waiting from the list for Jeff or for the list from Jeff. We brought back to starting five, uh, which was cool, completely unplanned. We planned on bringing it back to starting five Saturday night. Uh, however, we didn't know that, uh,
Speaker: Tony and Mike, we're going to pop in. So we got kind of that, that reunion with the guys and lady got involved and Connor got involved as well, uh, with the starting five. So I'm waiting for Jeff to send me that list so that I can get it posted so we can get votes up there. So the list might wind up staying up a little longer than plan. Uh, hopefully I'm doing pretty good, man. How's, how's things in your world?
Speaker: Mark, how's everything going over there in your neck of the world? How come you don't keep beers in a cooler? Well, uh, dog to answer your question. Uh, I have two beers and generally I drink them way before they get warm. So I don't necessarily need a cooler. My fridge is right out there in the kitchen. So, um, usually I have two or three of them back here and I drank them way before they get, uh,
Speaker: I say that, however, this is probably the only one I drink tonight. But we were having so much fun on Saturday night show that we actually wanted to go into a part two because we reached our six hour mark. And then I don't even, I honestly,
Speaker: Have no idea how long the second part the part two was We went another way we went a while. So it was a wild night Saturday night Cold over here man trying to get some fishing in by the end of the month. It's cold here too, bro I ain't trying to do shit outside except walk to my car and walk to my building or walk to my house
Speaker: Oh, good. Don't worry, man. I enjoy questions. Simple answer. I just drank it before they get cold. Um, and I don't have like, you know, I don't bring back like a whole 12 pack or anything, uh, or case, um, and we take breaks during the show. So, you know, during the breaks, I can go grab more beer if I need to, or I can just get up, you know, typically I have, you know, other people here with me. So I can just get up and kind of run out there and grab beer if I need it and let the other people talk.
Speaker: while we're, while we're doing the show. Um, but, uh, yeah, no, I am, uh, it's, it's, it's been unseasonably warm here. Um, the last week or so, and I think this week as well, it's going to be pretty warm for the, for the time of year, but, um,
Speaker: I don't like this time of year. I don't like the cold. I don't like going out in the cold. I don't like the, I just don't like it. It's on the rare occasions where we get sunny days. Like we've gotten the last few days. Uh, it's kind of nice. It's kinda, it's kind of a, uh, it's kind of a, uh, booster. It's a boost in your mood too. Um,
Speaker: seasonal depression shit, man. When it's all gray and gloomy out every day for like three weeks straight, you just start to just get a grumpy mood for it. And then I think it affects a lot of people because you see a lot of people that are normally like happy, cheery people. We get a week or so that just gray, gross shit up against the wall again, because I realized that.
Speaker: I'm a fidgeter and I shake my whole ass desk. I can only imagine what it looks like on your guys. But, um, so when you get those nice days where the sun comes out, you know, you get to see people coming out of their houses and, you know, coming out from work and taking walks and trying to get outside and enjoy that, uh, that little bit of nice weather. So to say, um, however, anyways, it was kind of what I want to, kind of what I wanted to chitchat about tonight was that, uh, depression stuff.
Speaker: But, excuse me, excuse me, sorry about that. I felt that one coming. I didn't feel that one a brewing. Holy crap. Oh man, I think I might have another one down the road. I don't know, we'll see what happens. But, you know, obviously we all know what depression is. I'm sure at some point,
Speaker: a good majority of us have dealt with it or felt a variation of depression. We all know that it's, you know, it just kind of puts you in a bad mood, you know, like not necessarily a bad mood. I guess you could grumpy, sad, just feeling blah. You know, you, you have no interest in doing anything. You know, sometimes it can last a long time. Sometimes it's just a day or two. You know what I mean? Um,
Speaker: Well, yeah, you just kind of feel, I guess, kind of empty. You know what I mean? You just kind of, I'm here. You're just kind of a shell at the end of the day. You know, I dealt with it for years. It was like a never ending fucking cycle, man. I really was. I was like, I just went through the motions every day. Get up, go to work, come home, eat dinner, hang out with the kids, go to bed. It was a cycle.
Speaker: never strayed, never differed. And it was just kind of, I was gone, so to say. But it's also, it also, you know, a sense of anxiousness with it. I think that's, you know, outside of having anxiety and social anxiety and stuff like that, when you're dealing with depression, it's just like amplifies it like a hundred times more. I think that's why, you know, especially in the last,
Speaker: I don't know year maybe two years my anxiety and whatnot has not been so bad I Still have my moments of you know anxiousness and stuff like that Because I'm not you know, I'm not I'm not nearly as depressed as much as I used to I'm not dealing with that shit and depression comes with you know, whether it be the weather or whether it be Situation with work or finances or you know
Speaker: anything can trigger it. You start worrying about something and it starts living in your fucking head rent free. And then the next thing you know, it just leads to some form of depression and it's okay. You know, the other day we've all been there. Uh, one thing that I've had to learn pack a small bag because it's not a vacation. You can't stay there very long. And that's what happened to me. I stayed there for way too long for way too many years. And
Speaker: It ate me up. And it takes time off. It takes years off of your life too, people. Like it'll age you and everything else. So it's wild to look back on the old me when I was going through all that shit and seeing it and dealing with it. And like, damn, I really was just kind of like, I was like a robot at the end of the day.
Speaker: Uh, like literally just like, you're not so depressed because I mean, you're like, no, or Nikki. What Gwen Gwen just chatted in the chatters boxes. She said, you're, you're not so depressed because I'm in your life now or Nikki tomato tomato. I think you got that backwards.
Speaker: You've caused me a lot of depression. Cause now you are in my life. I gotta stop. I'm going to give her a goddamn complex. Is your name, is your name Gwen? Is your name Gwen? Is your name Gwen? Is your name Nikki? I do like your hairstyle.
Speaker: whatever, you know, I'm kidding. Yeah, I know. I got a little bit of love for you even though I give you **** constantly. Oh my god. You know what? PA trip next weekend is cancelled. Canceled.
Speaker: What are you doing, dude? Yeah. Yeah, apparently that's, that's, that's um, have you eaten dinner? What would you eat? I don't care. Maybe.
Speaker: Possibly I do and yes, I can Go back to work I can do whatever I want. I can cancel anything Yeah, that'll lay me in all kinds of hell
Speaker: Oh, I love you too baby girl. I know that wasn't a map for me, but I'll take it. But, uh, no. Um, where the hell was I even at? Unacceptable. Jesus. It's like having Jeff here.
Speaker: Um, no, like I said, family, they love each other. Um, shop liver, choppity, chop, chop liver.
Speaker: Um, it's kind of derailed my whole entire, what I was talking about. No, I mean, it's outside of, outside of, you know, and you guys know me, I've made it really clear. I'm not.
Speaker: I don't want some Dodger to prescribe me. Frickin' got a weird -ass drug, so I'm not myself anymore. So I just kinda. Stay off the dark web, Nicky. Stop wearing arms.
Speaker: Apparently that's somehow in your, in your, in your search or your algorithm or something. Oh, I don't, you can turn that off. I'm so derailed right now. Like I said, Jeff's not even here, but it's almost like he is here. I'm so derailed and off topic right now.
Speaker: What's that? Oh, no, you're fine. I'm just between the kids and the, you know, squirrel. You're what? I believe it.
Speaker: Actually, you should have like another day and a half before you have to worry about that. Yeah, you're good without practice. Oh, somebody hasn't slept in like the last day. Day and a half 24 hours 20. 20 some odd hours.
Speaker: Is that including when you were on the couch? Somebody hasn't slept in the last two days. It's starting to kick her ass. Hopefully she'll be able to get some sleep tonight. She said she's she's going to go.
Speaker: trying to think of how to word that without fucking up the algorithm anyways a nice hot bubble bath and maybe some maybe that'll help relax her and then she'll be able to get some sleep tonight but um speaking of you know like deal with you know i'll get back on track just give me a second i got this i'm a trained professional well i'm not a trained but i am a i'm not even professional i just know i'll get back on track god damn it
Speaker: Speaking of depression as one of those things that when you're going through it or you're dealing with it, that's, you know, trouble sleeping, whether you're not sleeping at all, or you toss and turn all night or, you know, whatever. You know, and, you know, the sad thing or the crazy thing about it when it comes to, you know, dealing with, uh, you know, depression, there's no warning. There's no warning. I mean, it just hits you right now. So, you know, like I said,
Speaker: Sorry to, sorry to, uh, pop in for a visit, but don't stay there too long. Don't let it, don't let it consume you. Don't let it take over it. You know, unfortunately for me, that's what happened for years. And, you know, as I was saying, you know, that's where I kind of became, you know, a robot. I was for the most part, pretty emotional. Uh, and just went through my routines. I was there for a long time, you know,
Speaker: I get there every once in a while now, but it'll usually last like a day or two. If that is like, all right, everything's fine. I'll be all right. It'll work out. You know, I don't dwell on it. Um, but, uh, you know, that, that lack of sleep, that, that constant worry or, you know, whatever the anxiety, and I don't, I hope I never go back to the level of anxiety I used to have, but I tell you all.
Speaker: Um, I couldn't go out and eat in public. I could not go out to eat in public by myself. Like I would drive around. This is how crazy it was. I would drive around for two, three hours trying to decide on something and just go home and eat like a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I couldn't even go through the fucking drives here. Uh, cause I didn't want to talk. I didn't want to felt like I was
Speaker: get put under a spotlight. So, you know, I've always had the anxiety. I've always had the social anxiety, but I've been able to contain it and deal with it and kind of move along with it and still live relatively normal. But for those six, seven years where it got really bad, it
Speaker: I don't know how I functioned and did my job outside of the fact that it was just so, so routine. Whether I was in commercial setting or a residential setting, it was just so easy for me to just go through the motions and repeat the same stuff over and over and over again, that I could just get through my day. Even though, you know, I was dealing with people and I worked at a customer service style setting. So I was dealing with people all day long. It's just flipping that switch and just, you know,
Speaker: Or reaching that point with you know with my customers that they were there for salt. You know we I dealt with them for so long that There was just part of my normal my normal Routine normal life whatever you want to say so I knew them they knew me they they knew what I was going to do and you know it just kind of went from there I
Speaker: But it's not fun at the end of the day. Of course, back then, I didn't really have anybody. And so I'm hoping this might help some people because we're here. If anybody ever needs to talk or anything like that, I didn't have anybody back then. So it just progressively got worse and worse and worse. And the difference between then and now is,
Speaker: Know when it's starting to come on and you know, like I said take my day Waller around or whatever we grumpy for no reason and then and then move on I Am NOT a I Know it works for some people. I know some people don't care. I'm not a huge advocate of
Speaker: Going to a therapist and having them prescribe meds. You know, when I, when I did go to therapy, I just wanted somebody to talk to that was going to be there and listen and not be a bias. You know what I mean? I don't want your drugs and that's what I'll call them. I don't want the drugs. Uh, I don't want to lose who I am. I don't want to be a zombie of my normal self. And I know that, you know, they affect everybody differently and I know they're not narcotics or anything like that, but.
Speaker: I've also seen a lot of people that are on the anti -depressants and anti anxiety and God forbid they miss a day or two because man alive, they are in a fucking tailspin. So that was never my thing. That's why I found other avenues.
Speaker: Coping or dealing or coming to, you know, making sure I didn't stay there right along, whether it be playing video games, which is very relaxing to me. Um, while that will take me out of a funk real quick and hurry up, play video games for a little bit. Uh, doing the show has been awesome because I can say something that we can, we can dance with it for a couple of minutes and then move on. I don't have to sit there and, and, and, and spend.
Speaker: Hours on in talking about whatever or you know like Jeff and I last week last Wednesday We did the show and then we talked for like another two or three hours after the show because we were both kind of having a shit week Now we both had a lot of I wouldn't say I was having a shit week I just have a lot on my mind right now And Jeff said he was kind of having a shit week in the same thing so, you know We just took a couple hours up the show and talked to each other just kind of hung out and talked and and whatnot and I
Speaker: You know, if you're certain degree felt a little bit better about it, but you know, it's still something that's weighing on my mind. There's a lot going on, but, uh, it's not, I didn't, I didn't let it sit and simmer so long that I kind of reached that, uh, that, that snapping point, so to say. So.
Speaker: That's the nice thing about this show. It's also a nice thing about Jeff is Jeff and I can't talk to each other about whatever. And then we don't, you know, we might fuck with each other, but we can have a good conversation. Um, I knew there was a fucking hair floating around here. It was driving me crazy, you know, but anything can, anything can trigger that. And, you know, I'm sure you guys, um, if you're out there listening or whatever the case may be,
Speaker: and if you are here listening feel free to chime into the chatters box but um you know whether it be kids or work or money or car breaking down our relationship problems or the fucking wind didn't blow the right way you know what i mean the trigger that that that that mood swing to go into that depressive state um
Speaker: I know in your head, it feels like it's into the freaking world, but at the end of the day, everything will be fine. It'll all work out accordingly. I know it sucks right now. Uh, but I, I 100%, you know, no doubt in my mind, everything will work out and there'll be able to look back. And I mean, I, Lord knows I'm done it, man. I shoot just, just almost two years ago, I was in a real shit situation with my job and.
Speaker: You know and I was trying to get out of it and wasn't having much luck And then all of a sudden I got a phone call and it was like oh this this is this is a game -changer. This is huge now I Don't know where the wires gonna lead so But I was I was kinda I was kinda in a weird place about two years ago just because I
Speaker: job that I was at wasn't what I thought it was going to be. What wasn't what I was told it was going to be in it kind of put me in a, in a pinch financially, which then caused me to feel some sort of way about everything, you know, relationship, my kids, you know, just, just, just aggravated. I'll, you know, try not to let it show, but
Speaker: It's just something like that can absolutely 100 % trigger it. And nobody likes that. I don't think any of us, when we deal with it, I don't think we like that feeling hopelessness or the pessimism. I think that's a word. Is that a word, pessimism? Maybe it's a word. I think it's a word. We're going to go with it's a word. That comes along with it. Because everything's all doom and gloom, man. And it's hard to see.
Speaker: that quote -unquote proverbial light at the end of the tunnel because you're in a dark place and you're in your head and Everything is just doom and fucking gloom like, you know Obviously you're more irritable
Speaker: frustration level is up so you get frustrated quicker over little things something like things that normally wouldn't even Wouldn't even bother you you spill your cup of coffee and you're pissed off the rest of the fucking day and everybody or Restlessness which is something that I you know, I also deal with a lot. I fidget. I'm a fidgeter You guys are probably sitting here on the show. I know Nikki yells at me constantly because I don't realize it and my legs are shaking and
Speaker: I'm a nail biter when I start to get anxious or if I'm or if I'm anxious I'm a nail biter. I'm a fidgeter. I'm messing with something playing with something shaking my legs like a like a fucking lunatic. Oh And it's not something you're doing on purpose and you don't even realize it it's just Again, you know with the depression that anxiety levels boost it up So I mean especially if you're already an anxious person
Speaker: It's just I could be perfectly fine having a normal, you know, nothing wrong, anything like that. And I'm fidgeting with something or I'm, I'm shaking my legs. Like I got my new vape and my favorite thing to do. And I do it during the show all the time because it's got magnetic coverage on it. So all the time I'm constantly playing with it, you know, looking around, messing with it on here, doing this just, just.
Speaker: You're not infiltrating anything. Everybody is welcomed here. You know that. What's up? So just imagine me dealing with being depressed over whatever the case may be. I already have that restlessness as it is, amplify it by 100 when I'm in that fucking
Speaker: Depressed mindset already and then I'm I'm all over the place. I'm I'm like a like a fucking cracking You know, I'm literally I'm literally fidgeting with pigeon with everything, you know, my life It's an unconscious What is it I Can't think of the word again, I'm not a smart man
Speaker: It's like a comfort tool. You don't even realize that you're doing it, but it's almost comforting. You know what I mean? A lot of times I go to bed at night and my legs are shaking and I don't realize it, but it's just something that I've become accustomed to, like having my TV on. So, you know, I like to go to sleep with the TV on and a lot of times I go to sleep rocking my legs. That kind of shaking motion helps me sleep.
Speaker: with something. It's 100%. And you know, and I had to make sure like, when we do the show, I have to make sure that my desk is up against the wall because I'm sure sometimes you see this. You're speaking to my Oh, that's my flashlight. Nevermind. Oh, one of my legs was loose. Squirrel. But my legs are going the whole time. We're doing the show. And so I'm, you know, we're about an hour, hour and a half in. Yeah.
Speaker: you know, restless leg syndrome, whatever you wanna call it, stimming, yeah, you know, it's just, it's comforting. And, you know, and that's one of the quote unquote symptoms of depression is restlessness. And I'm not depressed right now, I just fidget, but it amplifies, like I said, I'm anxious.
Speaker: a lot for no reason. Like sometimes, sometimes I'm worried about something, but I just, I'm naturally an anxious person. Uh, and I don't mean to be, I just, I can't help it. Um, you know, uh, irritability is another one of those things. You know, somebody who might be normally pretty friendly, pretty fun to be around. If they're, if they're dealing with depression, all of a sudden they're, they're
Speaker: You know, they're quick to snap. They, they, you know, picking fights or arguing or, or just, just come across angry all the time. Um, I don't mean it. I can't help it. It's just that shit in their head, man. It's got them all weirded out and what, but it's just, uh,
Speaker: I will say that I was gonna say, nevermind. But yeah, just irritable for no reason. And the smallest things trigger you. You know, like I said, you spill a cup of coffee and you're in a bad mood the rest of the day and you're pissed off at everybody or, you know, you forget to get gas the night before or, and then you realize in the morning, fuck, I'm out of gas and it pisses you off.
Speaker: You don't have anybody to be mad at but yourself, but you're still fucking mad at everybody and you take it out on everybody Unfortunately, I was there Again, these are all things and it's funny now looking back on it. Well It's funny to me looking back on me personally Like not ha ha funny or comical funny is just like oh, yeah
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, okay. That was me. That was me. That was me. Wow. I was a real dick. But, you know, I was in, I was in a pretty bad state of mind for many years. Um, but yeah, I mean, I would get mad at people like, even at like, like, like work, they would be like, Hey, uh, we don't click. We need you to stop by so -and -so and drop something off. And I'm like,
Speaker: That's not fucking out of my goddamn way. Then I'm mad around like I've been out of shape the rest of the day where like now it's like Like for instance I Something random come up like a random side job at work that you know typically wouldn't necessarily be something we do or that I do and it's like Okay, I guess this is what I'm doing today I just kind of shrug it off like no adventure, you know
Speaker: Uh, it could be something simple, like, you know, uh, taking a package upstairs, you know, that, why didn't the UPS guy fucking take the package upstairs? Uh, you know, that's not my job. That's his fucking job. He literally just walked in the building and threw a package on the stairs. Really? Now my dog extreme and beside me where now it's like, Oh, I get to go see so -and -so and I'll take the package up to him. You know, I'll take the box up to him and, you know,
Speaker: see how they're doing or whatever, you know, it's, it's, it's funny how there's, it's complete 180. Either, either you're there and you hate everything and you're mad at everything, or you just kind of brush it off and go along with emotions or, you know, stuff like that. Or, you know, I tease, I tease Nikki. Um,
Speaker: Yeah, when you're right, you're right. Uh, you know, I tease Nikki all the time. We're not all the time, but yeah, she bought me my bear clothes, uh, to shred like chicken and, and roast and whatnot in the crock pot or, you know, whatever. If we, we smoke something or, you know, whatever. So I can shred, you know, shred chicken and, and, and steak or beef or whatever.
Speaker: And I tease her cause sometimes I'll come home from work and she's had like chicken or whatever in the, in the crock pot all day or a roast or whatever. And she's, uh, I said, like, can you shred it? And I'm like, Oh man, I got to go to work all day. Then I have to come home and slave River hot stove and cook dinner for you guys. I just want to take a break. Where? Like.
Speaker: three, four, five years ago, that would have irritated the hell out of me for no reason, for no reason, because it's not that big of a deal. I mean, in all honesty, I enjoy doing it. I have fun with it. And I get to use a new toy. I get to use my little bear calls. Well, not little, but, you know, but right now it's just like, now I can tease her and I can do something that doesn't, you know, it doesn't bother me, but like I said, you know,
Speaker: four or five years ago, that would have just sent me into a bad mood. I could have had a good day all day long. And then that would have been that, that one trigger. And I can leave him looking back on it now. I still can't explain why it happened or anything like that. Again, I'm not a smart man, you know? Um, so, Hey, what's going on, Jeeves? What's going on, brother? So, you know,
Speaker: These are, these are things like, I joke around, I'm not a smart man, but I'm, I'm hoping that, you know, somebody will hear this and they can, if they don't always already realize it or don't already know it, that they're dealing with depression or anything like that, that they can maybe take a look in the mirror. I wish I would have had somebody that would have been there and pulled me off to the side and said, Hey man. Okay. You know, but I didn't have that. I just kind of went through it on my own. And, you know, thankfully I.
Speaker: came out the other end, a better person, um, you know, but, you know, be mindful, you know, again, restlessness, irritability, kind of along the same lines of irritability is frustration. You know, you now, when you get frustrated, you may not necessarily blow up on people or go off on people, but you huff and puff around you, you pop your powder rounds, or you just, you might,
Speaker: you know, have a cup of drink or something and just every time you take a drink, you know, just, just for whatever reason. And it's the little thing. It's, it's always little things at the end of the day. It's always little things that you ever noticed. It's not the big things that, that sets you over the edge. It's the little things, you know,
Speaker: My kid left his damn bike in the hallway again. And now I'm frustrated and I'll been out, not that big a deal. Hey dude, get your bike. Or if he's not here, I simply pick it up. It takes 10 seconds to pick it up and put it in his bedroom or, you know, whatever the case may be, you know, but it's always the little things that really, that really kind of sends you into a tailspin, whether it be putting you, you know, make any frustrated or, or.
Speaker: Irritable or whatever the case may be. It's always the little things Looking back on it now So many things back then I thought were such a big deal when in actuality it wasn't like for instance when I would get in my car after You know like my ex -wife was driving it and my seat would be all the way to the fucking steering wheel And I would oh my that was a trigger
Speaker: trigger with the tee before anybody says anything. I used to, oh man, I was living. I'm like, how fucking hard is it? How hard is it to put my seat back? Or at least move it because you're five foot. I'm six foot two. I can't even get in my car without damn near breaking my back. But that was one of those things that would just set me over the edge. And I'm so pissed. Now, again, like I said, Nikki, she drives my car. She doesn't have to move my seat.
Speaker: Hardly at all. Yeah, she's only a few inches shorter than I am, but just get in and slide the button back. And all she does is move it forward. So it's not like I have to readjust it, um, get in and move it back and go on about my day. You know, it's like, it's kind of funny to look back on an album. Wow. I had so many little things.
Speaker: that you just thought was the end of the world. I thought it was the end of the world in my head. It was the end of the fucking world because my seat was moved up too far and it wasn't put back or, uh, something just, just trivial shit. You know what I mean?
Speaker: But everything, what's trivial now was a big deal back then. And it's wild to look back at it. I actually supposed to see it. He was taller than me, but shortly.
Speaker: Yes. Oh yeah. Oh my God. I, why do you think I go for oil changes and I go to a valley and that way nobody has to get in my car. I literally pull into the garage into the bay. I sit in my car the whole time. They do it. Yeah. Well, it wasn't, yeah. I mean, it would be stuff like that. I would go get an oil change and get in my car. And then I would get pissed because they moved my seat. It's like, why now I look back on it. I'm like, why, what am I so mad about? What it's a fucking seat. It takes me 10 seconds to adjust it.
Speaker: And and and and to fix it It's it's it's mind -boggling so I said I kind of laugh at myself But I also look back at the old version of myself and I'm like god damn I was an absolute fucking I had to be the most miserable son of a bitch to be around at the end of the day Like there's no wonder I basically just lived in my garage for for almost five years and didn't really come out and
Speaker: You know, I had to I must have been just an absolute Son of a bitch to be around Y 'all think I was think I'm bad now some of y 'all don't like me you should have seen me back then I'm just saying And you know
Speaker: Kind of talking about this depression thing. I also want to let you guys know just because you have a bad day every once in a while That's not depression. That's just having a bad day Unfortunately and again, especially mental health in general has a stigma on it Men's mental health has you know, in my opinion I think men's mental health has more of a stigma on it, but you have people out there that go online and
Speaker: And they've had a bad day. I'm so depressed. This depression is, is that I'm going to make a Tik TOK video and they've almost turned it into, it makes it harder for people who are actually going through this shit to want to talk about it because social media and the quote unquote influencers or want to be influencers have, have
Speaker: turned it into a trend and turned it into a trendy hashtag to get likes and views and followers. And I had a conversation with a friend of mine who will swear up and down, he suffers from depression and anxiety and this, that, and the other thing. And I'm like, no, dude, stop it. I was like,
Speaker: walk a day in somebody's shoes who actually live it before you start going on social media, putting up stupid memes and stupid quotes and, and, and, and, you know, everything else, you know, like live one day with somebody who's really going through it and fighting it because it's, it's not something that you want to go online and talk about. It's not something that you want to blast all over this tick tock and put stupid little, uh, hashtags and all that on there. Um,
Speaker: Yeah, I was I was like that I wore a mask, you know When I was at work if people were around for the most part Just depending upon how I was doing if I was having a particularly bad day I kept to myself But I mean hell I did I mean you can ask anybody you can ask anybody who
Speaker: ever came into one of my periscopes on Saturday nights, or even my TikToks when I first got on TikTok. I would have never guessed if you didn't know me. But I was heavily medicated. Heavily, heavily medicated. About the only time you could really tell something was wrong with me if I was having a particularly very bad day. And sadly,
Speaker: You know, I had more bad days than good, but you know, I could go to work. Like I said, you reach a point where you almost turn robotic and you just go through the motions. Uh, get up, go to work, come home, do dinner, hang out with the kids, go to bed. And it's a cycle. And it was to the point where even at work, I was literally telling every customer, it was, it was almost like a script inside my head. It went, when I would talk to my customers, it was a script. I said the same thing to every one of them.
Speaker: Keep the conversation short and sweet. Give them a little smile, maybe crack and choke and move on. Do what I need to do. Sign here. Thank you. See you next time out the door to go. Then I had customers I didn't even had talked to, which was fantastic. Just come and do my thing and mosey on down the road. But I mean, you, you, you get so emotionally shut off after so long that
Speaker: It's easy to fake it. And it really, it became extremely easy to fake it. Uh, uh, up until I got close to my like absolute breaking point and then it got harder. But again, I was, I was at my, my breaking point at, you know, I was almost ready to snap. So.
Speaker: But I don't know, Mark's still here. But you can ask Hosh, you can ask Mark. I mean, I knew Jay Money back then, or Monkey Jay, or NYC Jason, or whatever he's calling himself these days. I knew him back then. I'd say you could even ask him, but
Speaker: days, walked up and kicked him in the head. But there's other people who come in here like Krista and stuff like that, some of my friends from TikTok and whatnot, that, you know, I had a buddy of mine shortly after I came home, I went up to Michigan, and I went and hung out with him one night, and him and his girlfriend went out, his wife
Speaker: Uh, they had come down to Charleston, uh, and, and they were going to Florida for vacation. They extended their vacation by two days and came and stayed two days in Charleston. The first time we met got to hang out. They came and stayed at the house for two days. And, uh, when I was up in Michigan, after I came back home from Ohio, I didn't have any particular reason to go to Michigan. I just wanted to go. I just needed to get, I just needed to get out for a week and, uh,
Speaker: get out of Dodge for a week and clear my head and, you know, kind of do that stuff and figure out what the hell my next step was and, and, uh, you know, where I was going from, from that point on. And, um, he lives up in Michigan and, you know, we were about a half hour away. He's like, well, come up, man, let's hang out. Let's have a few beers, whatever. And, uh, I went up and met, met with him and his, and him and his fiance and wife again, wife now.
Speaker: And we were talking and you know, it's the night progressed he was like did you seem so much different than when we came down to Charleston? And I was like, I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. He's like, no, it's a good thing He said, you know, you're like a different person You know, I was still dealing with things back then I was just starting to learn to cope and understand and and be better about it and
Speaker: And he's like, no, dude. He's like for the, for the better. He said, you seem much happier. You see much more outgoing. Um, you just seem different than you were when we came to see you. Um, even, even when they were down there, there was a couple of times where I got a little irritated over something's kind of my mute and I had to kind of walk off and be on my own for a little bit. You know what I mean? Uh, just to kind of,
Speaker: Get my get my shit together, but I was very good at faking it back in the day And I think a lot of people do the lot of people like like you said, you know a lot of people they hide it very well they put on a mask they they They don't let their true self show
Speaker: that's scary and it's dangerous for them in the same sense because you know I think I think had I done things differently reacted differently maybe somebody would have noticed sooner maybe somebody would have been you know pulled me off to the side and been like what's going on or whatever but you know if I was in the branch I was laughing and joking and having a good time with people
Speaker: There was a lot of times that, you know, I would take the long way home from work and then sit out in the driveway for 10, 15 minutes just trying to decompress, just trying to decompress and as silly as this sounds, work up the courage to go into the house. Not because I was here for anything. It was just, I knew that I had to put on a face at the end of the day. You know, like I had to, I couldn't let my kids,
Speaker: see me in what I thought was being weak. I couldn't let them see the frustration and the stress. And unfortunately, they did as it progressed. They would get to see that kind of ugly side of me. But I would have to decompress for a few. And the great thing about being in a truck, working in a truck outside of going in and out of customers, places of business or houses, I'm alone most of the day.
Speaker: So I have that time to, it's a good thing. It's a bad thing. Cause when you're alone, you have all that time inside your fucking head to just go, yeah, you fucking suck. Yeah. You, you are a failure. You're this, you're that blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But at the same time, it was also nice to be able to not have to deal with that in front of people or, or whatever. I don't know. It's a weird catch 22. I don't make a lot of sense of it. It's in my head and it's coming out and it makes sense to me, but
Speaker: I probably won't make a lot of sense to other people. We all cope differently. We all deal with things differently. And that was kind of like my avenue, that alone time was both good and bad at the end of the day. It was both good and bad at the end of the day.
Speaker: So I'm gonna get ready and take a break here, but Yeah, I'll come back and talk just a little bit more About that sort of say about depression and whatnot before we go before I take a break here real quick I do want to shout out. Excuse me shout out one of our sponsors liquid ivy
Speaker: Obviously we all know that proper hydration is very important in our day -to -day life. A lot of us think that we're properly hydrating and, you know, think that we're doing everything right by drinking a lot of water and, you know, and getting those sports drinks and all of them sports drinks are not always good for you. And as we know, especially if you're like,
Speaker: the gym trying to work out and lose weight that water weight man water will bloat the hell out of it plus water is just fucking boring at the end of the day water is boring well liquid ivy is going to make water not so fucking boring because they've got like 16 kick ass flavors they also come in a sugar free variety and they've got liquid ivy for kids
Speaker: Not only that, but one packet and 16 ounces of water is going to hydrate you two times faster than water alone. So you don't have to, you don't have to drink nearly as much. And it's got three times the electrolytes, uh, as those, uh, leading sports drinks, not only that, but it's got vitamins and shit in it as well. So head on over to a liquid ivy .com real people, real flavor, real hydrating, use our promo code words are hard.
Speaker: At checkout, save 20 % off your entire order when you shot better hydration today at liquidiv .com. Make sure you use our promo code. Words are hard. Get that 20 % off, mother suckers. Let's take a real quick break here. We can do a little...
Speaker: I'm gonna do a little hunger strike small -town Titans and blacktop mojo with their cover of hunger strike I'll be back here in just a few minutes I don't mind
Speaker: Red from the miles of decadence But I can't feed on the powerless When my cup's already overfilled Yeah
Speaker: But it's on the table, the fire is cookin' And the firemen babies, the slaves are all workin' Blood is on the table, the miles are all chokin' And I'm goin' hungry We're not on my steaks
Speaker: Blood is on the table, the fire is cooking And the farming babies, the slaves are all working Blood is on the table, the mouths are
Speaker: I'm going up
Speaker: Yeah, buddy. Two of my favorite bands. Blacktop Mojo and Small Town Titans. You can find them on all social media and wherever you listen to music at Blacktop Mojo and or at Black... words are hard. At Blacktop Mojo and at Small Town Titans. They're all over the place. They're everywhere. They're not hard to find. The guys at Small Town Titans are actually doing this really cool thing.
Speaker: Um, I don't know how long they've been doing it, but, um, we riff and they're taking like barcodes off of, uh, you know, like five hour energy drink and, uh, catch up and whatever, just random items at the grocery store and whatnot. And then they are able to take those barcodes and.
Speaker: based off the numbers and whatever, see if it riffs. And then there's like, come up with random ass songs and whatnot. It's pretty cool. But however, welcome back to non -sensical nonsense, everybody. It is Monday night. You know, a couple of weeks back, I decided I want to dedicate Monday night to men's mental health, AKA a weekly bro check. Got a little bit, typically I had a panel with me.
Speaker: Uh, no panel tonight. Uh, so we're doing this solo, which is fun. Uh, to say the least, uh, however, you know, I wanted to start focusing on men's mental health, uh, and, and, and, and having conversations about it and not so much trying to fix anybody or whatever, just sharing our stories and talking about things that we've gone through and dealt with and, and.
Speaker: I know this is kind of a cliche word to say, but survivors at the end of the day, we've all made it through. We're all examples of it'll, it'll get better and just try to keep your head up and keep pushing forward and do what you need to do. And hopefully through us sharing our stories, hopefully with us talking about, um,
Speaker: Our thing our issues and and stuff that we've gone through maybe we'll help somebody maybe somebody else that's out there going through Going through the motions and whatnot. We can help With that being said, I don't think it's I don't think it's too early. I don't think it's too premature to announce Coming up in March. We will be Linking up with and collaborating with the guys from talking shit They were on the show Saturday night mark and Brian
Speaker: Uh, but we will be linking up with them on a Monday night and doing a show together. Um, nonsense will nonsense and talking shit, like it up and doing a men's mental health weekly bro check together. Um, I think they might have a guest or two that, that, that they're going to bring on with them. Uh, but it'll be across all of our platforms. So I'm looking forward to that. I think that's going to be really cool. Uh, the guys were in there Saturday night and they said they liked what I'm doing here and they,
Speaker: wanted to piggyback off of it and ask if it would be okay. And I said, well, if you guys would be interested in it, how about we do something together? I mean, as well as do something, you know, do your own thing, but maybe we could do something together and they were down for it. So that'll be coming up here sometime in March. Speaking of talking shit, they got their anniversary show Thursday night at 8 PM.
Speaker: their YouTube channel and Facebook channel at Talking Shit. Shit is spelled S -H -T -T -T. They got a lot of guests coming on. Former guests kind of come in and celebrate their one -year anniversary. They got a top secret special guest that they're still working on. Hopefully they'll land them and that'll be really cool for the guys and
Speaker: I might pop in and make it a little, a little appearance on there, but, uh, happy birthday. Happy anniversary to, uh, talking shit. Mark and Brian one year. That's huge. That's the year you made it past that first year. Now everything else you'll, you'll be golden, man. It'll be easy, easy breezy. Nothing to worry about. It's a piece of cake now that you got past that first year. Uh, however, speaking of social medias.
Speaker: If you guys be so kind, go ahead and check us out and give us a follow. We do have the Facebook, Instagram, X, and TikTok page. We do do the show Monday, Wednesdays, and Saturday, 7 p .m .ish on YouTube, Twitch, and Facebook. And you can listen to us anywhere, anywhere, anytime, wherever you listen to podcasts at, whether it be Spotify, Apple, Google, or any other podcasting app, we're there. You can listen to us.
Speaker: All that nonsensical nonsense podcast or you can simply jump on over to this right here bio dot link slash nonsensical nonsense that that link there has all of our social media links everything you'll need for us and And also has our links to sponsors in there as well um
Speaker: You can check them out, make sure you use promo code words are hard. And not only do we make it that easy to make a bio link, but we also have in our bio on all of our social media, the link is there as well for the bio link. So if you're, if you're following us on YouTube and you want to check out the Facebooks or anything like that, right there at the top of the page, bada bing bada boom. Any who, any who, any who, any who. So tonight, you know, I'm spending a little bit of time and I'm talking about depression.
Speaker: You know, we've talked kind of sort of just kind of a brief, you know, what depression, you know, kind of how depression made me feel where I was, some of the, some of the symptoms and whatnot, you know, kind of whenever there's a little bit, but, you know, they, they say, they say some of the reasons and I, like I said, I've kind of touched on this a little bit, some of the reasons,
Speaker: that you get depression or have severe depression, sometimes it's genetics. Sometimes it could be, it could be genetics or the genes you inherit from parent, but also, like I said, stressful events, personality, to just family history, pregnancy, given birth, obviously men, we're not going to have to go through that, but you know, menopause again, we don't have to go through that.
Speaker: Loneliness alcohol and drugs or illness, you know I Had the stressful events family history Loneliness and and I know that when I was a raging alcoholic that absolutely absolutely Didn't help matters none, you know and You know alcohol is a it's a downer
Speaker: I think that's what they call it a downer. You know, some drugs are an upper alcohol is a downer. Um, so, you know, not only that, but, you know, just feeling like I was alone in the world. I don't have many friends in real life. Um, even when I was with somebody, you know, or I was in a relationship, it felt like I was, um, you know, we were a million miles apart, you know, whatever the case may have been family history.
Speaker: Did not have the greatest upbringing. You know, that's still, that still hits me from time to time. So, you know, I, you know, I, I dealt with this shit. Stressful events. I mean, financial burden, shitty jobs, you know, whatever the case may be. So, you know, you just, you know, you just never, you just never know. Uh,
Speaker: So, you know, like I said, you know, we, we, we talked a little bit about the depression and stuff like that. Um, some of the characteristics of depression, obviously we know is like sadness. Um, you'd have like a lack of interest in, in, in, in any, you know, uh, I don't really want to go out tonight. Uh, I don't want to hang out with people, you know, I'm just, I'm not.
Speaker: I didn't enjoy the things that I used to really enjoy. I've always enjoyed being around people and hanging out with people and everything like that. And I got to a point where I just didn't want to be around anybody or do anything. I couldn't find any source of enjoyment in anything. Sleep, I didn't sleep for years.
Speaker: sleep was not my friend i might get a couple hours a night and it was like that for years um i used to joke around that i was a functional insomnia i just did not sleep your appetite
Speaker: Uh, tiredness, obviously, if you're not sleeping, you're going to be tired for concentration. If you're tired or you're hungry or whatever, you're not going to be able to concentrate. If you're not eating right, you're going to be tired because your body doesn't have that fuel to, to keep you going at the end of the day. You know what I mean? Because you don't, you have no appetite. You, you, you know, you're, you, you, so.
Speaker: You're not eating that's gonna lead to being tired. It's gonna lead to lack of concentration Yeah, you're not gonna be able to fucking focus on shit. I was man like I said After years and years it was literally a it was routine it was a very it was a very scripted like, you know, I I knew what I needed to do it just No focus was needed. This is what I need to do. This is how I'm gonna do it and it was blinders The whole way can relate a hundred percent. Yeah, all right
Speaker: I think a lot of people can relate to it. But yeah, I mean, that's one thing. You're definitely, I mean, I did not sleep for shit for years between nightmares or something that have always bothered me. A lot of that has to do with my past, for my nightmares, night terrors.
Speaker: dealing with depression and whatnot like that. Part of the reason you're not sleeping very well is because of the night terrors. I don't know how true that is. I had a therapist tell me that because we were talking about it and I told him about my nightmares and my night terrors and stuff like that, two different things. And he said that part of depression, that's why when we're so
Speaker: The dark and those night terrors are one of the things that that affect our sleep You know as I've and I'm not I'm not a hundred percent, you know By no means I do sleep better these days. Well I'm so last couple weeks But I do sleep better. I don't have the night terrors. I had quite as frequently and about the only time I get nightmares or something like that is if something's on my mind and
Speaker: or something's bothering me. So, I mean, you're just, you're just not sleeping. You can't sleep for one reason or another. So you're, you just, you're constantly dragging ass. You look like hell. I mean, thank God I wore glasses because when I, you know,
Speaker: I can see him now, but when I wasn't sleeping there, my eyes were all, I looked like a, like a, like a piss poor attempt at a zombie movie, you know, like a, like a, like a D movie, like a D zombie movie. They just painted black under your eyes, you know, and then painted your face white and you were a zombie, you know, puppy bags.
Speaker: They're like dark circles under my eyes. It was, it was bad. You know, thankfully I wore glasses and, you know, being down South, it was sunny a lot so I could wear sunglasses. So, you know, I could kind of, you know, hide them a little bit, but, um, it, it was when I started sleeping and when I say I didn't sleep for years, I probably didn't sleep like a normal human being for 20 plus years. I was from, from being.
Speaker: my teenage years, I learned to function quite well off of three, four hours of sleep at night. If that, if that, um, there were some times where I would go a couple of days without any sleep. Um, then you factor in that shit. You factor in that you factor in, you're not sleeping, you factor in how tired you are. You're already dealing with the depression shit.
Speaker: And again, it amplifies it. It makes it even worse because now you're adding another, it's, it's, it's like, I got, I got a small fire here, but I'm going to keep trying to put it out with gasoline. You know what I mean? So it starts out small, a little bit of gasoline on it. It gets a little bit bigger, a little bit more gasoline. It gets bigger and eventually it's out of control. And it's one of those.
Speaker: That's part of that cycle. You know, if you're tired, you're exhausted, you're not sleeping. Your mind's not right already. You're already dealing with a whole bunch of shit and then it just amplifies. Like I said, on top of it, then you have no appetite. There was a point, um, in my life, I was about 19. Now I was about 20, 21.
Speaker: I'm gonna say this a lot of people would be like really do this not that bad, but I've got a big frame So I was about 200 and about 205 210 something like that. I Look sick. I looked sick. My neck was sunken in my eyes were sunken in I Just looked incredibly unhealthy and I was I was drinking a lot. I was drinking a fucking lot and
Speaker: Wasn't eaten properly. I might eat once a day if that I wasn't sleeping Because I was staying up if I wasn't partying and drinking I just couldn't sleep. So why not party and drink? I'm up anyways, but I look sick. That's the smallest I've ever been in my adult life Is that right around that 200 mark? And I look like I said I looked fucking like I was knocking on death's door
Speaker: But again, I was depressed as shit. Felt like I didn't have anybody. I was drinking like a goddamn fish. I wasn't eating. And it wasn't like I was partying because I was having fun with it. I just wanted to drink and have a good time and didn't want to be alone. Even though, you know, I could there's all these things I could be in a room.
Speaker: with 100 people, but I felt like I was the only person there. It was wild, it was wild. And looking back on it and thinking about these things like I've been doing, and it's not like it's not bringing me down or anything like that. It's actually been great to really, since I started doing this show, to look back on where I was and what I was going through and what my mindset was physically, mentally, where I was,
Speaker: Where I am now so And even even that even that far back, you know 20 years ago 20 plus years ago, I was still just you know, I've talked to friends from back then and Recently what not in the last couple years and to hear them say dude you were like a fucking robot man you know emotion just
Speaker: And that's where I get that from. It's not something that I just read or pulled out of my ass. It's from people telling me, dude, you're an emotionless robot. I've had a lot of people in my life tell me that. Uh, even back then, I just didn't listen cause I didn't fucking care. Uh, or I didn't understand, or I didn't know what the hell they were talking about me, you know? Uh, but to hear it now, it's like you look back on it. It's just like, yeah, man, I was, I was, I was a bit of a mess, but, uh,
Speaker: And I think it's, I think it's, you know, I joke around about the ADHD or ADD or ADHD or whatever. I don't think it was ever that, I think it was just that lack of concentration from dealing with the depression and having that one of those side effects or characteristics or whatever. It was just, I was always so scatterbrained. You know, my, my, my head was, you know, my brain was going 400 miles an hour and I couldn't focus on one thing. My head was like a bowl of spaghetti. I don't know if you've ever heard that analogy. Um,
Speaker: There's there's an old analogy where it says Men's brains are like like a waffle or something like that. Very plain very simple very easy Women however have the bull spaghetti because they're everywhere, you know, they're thinking about kids and work and you know Bills where men are just simple creatures Well, I and I still have to this day. I have that bull spaghetti it for a brain some kind
Speaker: I guess. Oh, yeah. That's the end of morning. You know, even today, I still have that I'm 400 miles an hour. I'm all over the place. I'm thinking about 45 different things all at the same time. So there's a lot of reasons. Sometimes I, I'll be talking about something and kind of trail off and I gotta, I gotta, I gotta wrangle it back up and bring it back around. Um, but, uh, you know, when I was going through it,
Speaker: It was it was pretty bad. It was it was real bad. That was a nice thing about. About. Going into construction and being in construction for work for me, because I was all over the place. I wasn't stuck in an office or I wasn't stuck at.
Speaker: uh, you know, I wasn't stuck in one spot. I might be on a job site building the house or doing, you know, whatever, but I could go from hanging a door to running plumbing, to grabbing a shovel and digging a ditch just because we needed a ditch somewhere or jumping on a piece of equipment or, or whatever, you know, I could, my, my brain was allowed to, all right, we're going over here. Oh, we're back over here. You know, it.
Speaker: Don't matter as long as the job gets done. Being in this career has allowed me, or even when I was doing pest control, because at the end of the day, let's be honest. I could be at one house and have one situation and I'm in another house and then I have this situation. I go to a business and I have a totally different situation I'm dealing with. You know, I might do 14 jobs in a day and not do the same thing twice in a day.
Speaker: So that was very beneficial, beneficial to me, especially when I, you know, like I said, when I was at my lowest and, and I did, I spent, I've spent more years dealing with depression and, and, and being quote unquote depressed than I have not at this point in my life. Big juice. What's going on, brother? How are you doing?
Speaker: Told you a lot's changed my friend a lot has changed But um Jesus speaking of losing my train of thought Um
Speaker: Okay. Whoops. All right. But no, like I said, you know,
Speaker: It's, it's wild to look back on now and to talk about it is even crazier. To just be like, again, like I said earlier, not, not only was I, I was not only was I born 400 years ago, just Paul, stop it.
Speaker: Don't know what's going on my TV. It's losing its mind Not only was I probably a miserable son of a bitch to be around at some points or to deal with or whatever But the fact that it went on for so long and and and nobody really ever noticed his wild too because It really does go to show and you know, and I know I'm guilty of it as well It's it's very easy
Speaker: to, uh, to turn a blind eye or say, I didn't know. I had no idea. Blah, blah, blah. When sometimes all it takes is just that one person, I forgot it was you for a minute. Well, yeah, you last time. I think last time you see me, uh, I, uh, didn't have this big as beard.
Speaker: Ghosts Apparently there is what he the ghost in my bedroom wants to watch fucking wants to watch Highlander Which is what I just recently started watching again talking the cloud of the clay in the cloud. Ah How's life been life's been Life has been interesting to say the least
Speaker: Uh, the last, uh, uh, last five years, six years have been, uh, an interesting roller coaster to say the least, uh, between, uh, um, divorce, couple failed relationships, walking away from everything in South Carolina, coming back to Ohio, starting all over again.
Speaker: to now being in probably the healthiest and best relationship I've ever been in my life and planning our wedding and good job after, you know, it took me a few years to get a good job. It's been a...
Speaker: It's been a ride to say the least, but, uh, it's been a, it's been an interesting ride and it's also been good for, for, for me mentally as well. I've, I've gotten to probably the best place I've ever been in my life mentally. Um, guess who's back click his back back again.
Speaker: uh so oh yeah dude yeah man see see i try telling you people i've been drinking this for a hot minute now i started drinking it a long ass time ago and nobody ever believes me uh trying to channel yeah i am
Speaker: I love this show. I love the movies too. And like every few, every, every so often I start watching this show over again. Uh, but yeah, you know, um, I mean, even, even, even starting to do this, this new show or not necessarily the new show, but it's, it's the podcast we've been doing it almost three years now, but now the break tune to the weekly bro check, the men's mental health, um, having panel, you know, bringing people up.
Speaker: Having having this is the first time I've done it without a panel So I'm just kind of philandering around and whatnot and filler bustering I guess But you know inviting other guys up to share their story and talk about things and I'm not trying to fix anybody as I said I'm just trying to share story and anybody else who wants to share their story is more than welcome to As well So, you know if we read it
Speaker: If if our story helps one person and that's all that matters at the end of the day or if my story or whatever That's that's that's all that matters and Thanks us Love you, buddy. I appreciate that
Speaker: Jeez, ah, you know, I honestly I don't know I I sent Brian I Sent Brian the link And then I put the link in our snapchat group chat as well for you know, if anybody wanted to come up and whatnot The beard says it all you've been through hell
Speaker: Man, I'll tell you what, I have a, I have a shirt in the closet that I got that I love. I actually, I need to break it out one night for this show. I didn't hear anything from you. So I didn't know if you wanted to come up. So I didn't want to bother you. I didn't know if you were doing something. What do you want to share? Are you going to stay on topic? What happened?
Speaker: Have a I have a shirt it's got a big old skull on it says Don't let my scars fool you they don't tell you my story or they don't tell you my whole story something like that. I love that fucking shirt Well the crazy thing was was like
Speaker: up to five, 10 minutes before the show started, we were actually talking to the staff and I was like, well, here's the link guys. Send him the link and other than am I ghosted. Don't give me that BS. What did I get for Christmas? Did I get for Christmas? Got Bigfoot pajamas. That was pretty cool.
Speaker: My memory is terrible. Oh, I got it. Plus I'm not used to getting Christmas gifts either. So that's the other thing. That was, that was like first time in the last couple of years, you know, I've been on the uptick, but man alive. Yeah. My memory is, is, is fucking shot.
Speaker: Don't give me that BS. Absolutely. I definitely got that. That is for sure. The love of a good woman, 100%. Man, again, one part of the joys of my reckless past is my brain doesn't always work the way it's supposed to.
Speaker: Got a mug. Got me a nice new mug. Big mug. Fucking hell. I am the worst ever. At the end of the day, I'm the absolute worst. Wow, I fucking suck. Hold on one second. I just texted it to you.
Speaker: Got some brown slippers, some brown socks from my daughter. Oh, I got my new hat. I got some beard product, got some oils and stuff like that and some, uh, other stuff. Oh man. Yeah.
Speaker: So I quit smoking for a while. And then I started smoking when we came back to Ohio. I saw vape forever. I mean, I had the whole vape and chill show and everything like that on Periscope. And I quit smoking for 10, 10 years, I think. And when I came back to Ohio and everything that was going on,
Speaker: The stress of everything. I started smoking again. And then one day I was doing the show with Jeff and I said, I'm done. I'm done. I'm done smoking. And Jeff's like, Oh, you're going to quit again. Nice. I said, no, I'm done right now. This is my last cigarette. And just like that, I gave it up. So still got my babes. Got a whole bunch of them floating around here. This is my new one. Nikki got me this one for Christmas. I freaking love it.
Speaker: Lost vapes Centaurus Oh My god, I feel horrible I can't remember what all I got for Christmas at all for a little life of me I Can remember what I pretty much everything I got making and I got the kids and we got the kids My memories it's weird or
Speaker: You know, I do. I do need to get a robe. I got new slippers. My daughter got me a Cleveland Brown slippers and Cleveland Brown socks like big like comfy socks. I do need a robe. A robe would be nice. I want other big. But yeah, no, you know, again, past decisions. I've taken one too many hits to the head. So my memory is not the greatest. It's like short, like,
Speaker: It's weird, like some short term, some long term type memory issues. But anyways, that's a whole nother story for a whole nother night. Don't worry. But, um, no, I was, you know, I was talking about, you know, the depression and the, and the crazy thing I was with the crazy thing about depression is, um, there's multiple types of depression.
Speaker: And whether it be a clinical depression, which is mental health disorder, persistently, you're just in a depressed mood or a loss of interest, like I said, persistent depressive disorder. It's a mild, but long -term form of depression, bipolar disorder. I've known some people like this in my life. I was married to one. She was diagnosed. I'm not just making jokes and being mean.
Speaker: That's a while right bipolar 2 and then of course our ladies they they suffer from postpartum depression, which is wild. That's crazy but uh Yeah, so, you know I Got a new no, what's that for Christmas or is that for my birthday I think it was for my birthday
Speaker: I don't know, man, I'm all over the place. I'm everywhere. Don't worry sauce, but you know, uh, big juice. I know you've, I know you've gone through some, uh, some, some recent, uh, some big changes in life and whatnot. I don't know if you do the camera thing or, or if you do the show thing, but you know, if you ever wanted to come up here on a Monday night and share your story, you're more than welcome to.
Speaker: I encourage all of our male listeners to reach out to me if they'd ever like to come up on the show on a Monday night and have a conversation, share your story, whatever the case may be, or just talk about things. I got under the depression thing. I was thinking about it. I've been thinking about it because
Speaker: Like I said, I've got some I've got some personal stuff going on right now like with work and everything like that I don't want to dive too much into it. Just just some shit going on with work and I know a lot of things have been weighing heavy on my mind lately and worried and whatnot, you know and I haven't been sleeping very well in the last couple of weeks, but I'm Doing the you know, I'm doing the best I can not to fall into that that depressive state
Speaker: or go down that road again, trying to stay positive, trying to, you know, um, quote unquote, keep my head above water. So, so they say, um, and that that's got me thinking a lot lately about, you know, where I was six years ago, seven years ago, whatever the case may be. And, and kinda going down that, going down that old memory lane or whatever.
Speaker: And realizing like, I look back on it now and go, yeah, it was for, for, for many years. It wasn't like just something that, I mean, like I said, it was for my teenage years all the way up until, you know, five, I started getting better about five years ago, four or five years ago, I started getting better. I started to come to terms with things and started cutting people out of my life and get rid of the toxicity and, and realizing that.
Speaker: Not everybody who claims to be a friend or claims to be family because we can't pick family. They're not really there for your best interest at the end of the day. And I started getting rid of those people. I started, um, Yeah. Uh, and things started getting better. So, you know,
Speaker: I don't want to be back in that, I don't want to be back in that boat again. And I think that's why I've been thinking about it so much lately to the point where I wanted to bring this topic of conversation up tonight. And the last couple of weeks we've had Connor on and Haas has been here and Brian's been here.
Speaker: I just kind of sit back and listen and added my two cents from time to time. And I wasn't really, that was the other thing I realized, you know, I'm not really sharing. I got these other guys on here sharing stories and I'm not, uh, so, um, summer.
Speaker: It's just a little turbulent, but you don't hit from time to time. Oh yeah, exactly. A little bump in the road families. And that's absolutely not. Trust me. I don't really talk to any of them. Uh, you know, sadly, unfortunately, I don't really associate with my family much. I try to talk to my sisters as much as I can. Uh, we're just all doing our own things. We all have our own lives and everything like that, but I didn't get rid of the toxic. Um, so.
Speaker: I guess that's part of that mental healing that you go through, that process that you go through when you start to heal, when you start to get mentally right upstairs, is that you know the characteristics or you know the symptoms when things are starting to go a little bit sideways and you're able to catch them. Where before I had lost so much, I had lost control, like 100 % lost control, it was gone. I was gone. It was just, here it is.
Speaker: where now I'm smart enough and I know better. Okay, I can see you creeping up and I'm gonna go ahead and nip you in the bud right now. Again, great thing about this show, about this podcast, about this podcast in general, Nonsense Will Nonsense. I have an outlet. I can vent, I can,
Speaker: Come and have fun, hang out with my friends, my real friends. I don't have to deal with the fake people. I don't have to deal with the fakeness. I don't have to deal with the toxic people. I don't have to deal with the toxicity that some people bring into your lives because all I have to do to get rid of them is one button. Literally, I hate to block people, but sometimes you got to. And that's essentially what I've done in my real life too. People like that, I've just hit them with a block button and I've been better for it.
Speaker: And like I said, also realizing, okay, why am I getting upset about my seat being moved? I need to stop, recenter myself, get my shit right and make sure I'm good. It's a seat. I can move it. It's not that big of a deal or whatever the case may be. I don't need to,
Speaker: get worked up over it. Then you find yourself starting to go down that fucking spiral. And it's like a spiral staircase. Once you start falling, there's no stopping until you hit the button. I don't know if you guys have ever fallen down a spiral staircase. I hope you haven't. I have literally fallen down a spiral staircase more times than I would like to admit. No, I wasn't drunk. I wish I would have been because it probably wouldn't have hurt his back.
Speaker: But there ain't no stopping until you get done on that world, on that worldly wind. Cause you're going all the way down to the bottom and you're going to hit that ground. And I don't know which hurts the worst, hitting the ground or getting rolled for however long it takes. But that's, that's having that awareness and that, that, that, that mental capability and having your mind right to go, okay.
Speaker: I'm starting to slip here. Let me get my footing. Let me realize whatever it is is not as bad as I'm thinking it is. So we're just gonna kinda push forward and move on. Like I said, do I have my days? Yeah, I still have my days where I get a little bit depressed, but they usually don't last more than a day or two. We're allowed to have those days. I think they call them mental health day.
Speaker: You know, but naturally as bad, you know, we, we automatically have the weight of the world on our shoulders because we worry about our kids. We worry about our finances. We worry about, you know, providing and, and, and having a house and paying the bills and, you know, this, that, and the other thing, making sure the kids have everything they need. So you already have that building worry and that building stress.
Speaker: sometimes can be a little bit overwhelming not to factor in when you throw in outside stuff that you're not expecting or the the unplanned or something like that that really just Just next thing you know, it's a fucking hurricane Not as far yes I'll have to tell that on a Wednesday or Saturday
Speaker: We need to get you a goddamn flat. You don't need to deal with the stairs anymore in your life. Yeah, I'll have to, I'll have to share that story one time. Not once, not twice, but three times I've, I've gone down a set of spiral stairs and it's not fun. No, I wasn't drinking. I promise you I was not drinking and I wasn't hung over or anything. What do I have in here? I can't remember. It's definitely not that about two new bottles of juice.
Speaker: Fluffy Dragon, Blue Raspberry Cotton Candy, and Dragon Punch, Sweet Apple Watermelon Candy. That's what I have in there. But that's it. That's another, you know. And again, I'm no doctor. I'm no expert.
Speaker: But just in my experience and going through this stuff, I've noticed as I began to grow and get my shit kind of somewhat in check, my mental stability in check, I'm more aware of things than I ever was before, for me personally.
Speaker: Obviously I'm aware of situations outside, you know with with friends or people or you know Really, you know stuff like that. But like me personally where most of the time that's where we kind of fall and we drop the balls You don't take care of ourselves whether it's physically or mentally We're not taking care of ourselves properly so that's kind of where I was work now it's like
Speaker: I know what's going on. Hey, I'm talking to you right here upstairs. I'm gonna need you to shut the fuck up for a minute I Need to be a mindless zombie for a minute But uh
Speaker: levels of depression situation you know I just wanted a little bit more information than what I kind of you know so I was kind of looking stuff up tonight and I'm learning that there's a lot more that goes into
Speaker: I want to look and see something. I'm trying to find something. So this is the other thing that I learned as I started diving into this world. And as I said, and I'm just going to, I'm just going to speak for me personally. When I started this quote unquote journey, and you're probably going to hear me say that a lot for me personally, when I started this journey to better mental health, um,
Speaker: One of the first things that I, you know, obviously I wanted to do was get my, get my body right. I started eating better. Now I still, I'm not saying I eat healthy or I'm, I'm a vegan or anything, but I was, I was eating, I'm eating on a more regular basis. I'm eating better. I'm, you know, I didn't say I was eating healthy. I am eating better from not eating for days at a time to maybe eating once or twice a day.
Speaker: There's a big difference between now and then. I've always been one, like I don't, I've never been a big eater, but I'm eating better. Like I said, I'm not even healthy by no means, but I'm eating better. I try to, I try to have some kind of sleep pattern.
Speaker: You know, I'd like to say Nikki and I go to bed at a decent time. However, we do come back here and lay in bed and watch true crime televisions for two hours and an hour or two hours and whatnot. Um, but, and then, you know, like to get back into the gym. I keep saying that, but it's like, I am a very routine person. And once I get into.
Speaker: it. Or whatever our routine. I like it that way. And I try to keep it that way. Once that routine is broken, it's very hard for me to get back into it. That I just I don't have a lot of free time outside of like the weekends. I mean, I'm doing a show four nights a week. I'm working
Speaker: you know, making the kids are here. So not that she would stop me from going to the gym or anything like that, but it's hard to get into that routine, but I'm taking care of my body a little bit better, a little bit better than I used to still not a part a hundred percent. But then I was able to, you know, once that was, once that was getting better, then I was able to start focusing on my mental aspect, you know, and start, start trying to clean that up. And
Speaker: You know, I learned a little bit through therapy. It helps having a partner who I can actually talk to who is not going to make me feel like shit if I'm having a bad day. Um, and then like I said, having this podcast has been fantastic because I can, um, you know,
Speaker: If I am having a bad day or whatever, I can, we can do the show and I can come in here and hang out and have a good time and, and, and forget about it for a little bit. And, you know, realize that once the show, you know, once the show's over, whatever, whatever that might've been that was bothering me at the time being or if it's just something as simple as coming home and just sitting on the couch and watching TV with Mickey and so whatever that
Speaker: whatever that was that was bothering me, I can start to kind of slow my brain down enough to go, okay, it's not that big of a deal. You're getting worked up over nothing. Whereas before I would just let it start to just eat and eat and eat and eat and eat at me. So, get your diet right.
Speaker: or better, whatever, try to get some sleep, maybe do some exercise, check out our friends at Liquid IV, get properly hydrated, use promo code words to heart, go shameless plug, sorry. And then, you know,
Speaker: Start to notice that the mental stuff becomes pretty easy Especially when you start to acknowledge it. That's the biggest that's that's the biggest hurdle You're gonna have to come that you're gonna have to go across when it comes to and again you're probably gonna hear me say this a lot on Monday nights actually acknowledging and coming to terms and realizing that you that there's something wrong and that you have a problem and be willing to accept change You know
Speaker: I've known people in my life and I've, and there's people that I've cut out of my life that know their problem, know they have problems, but won't admit to it nor even be anywhere in any frame of mind, be willing to try to change because they don't think there's anything wrong with them. Even though everybody around them is saying the exact same thing. They will, they will die on that Hill and say, I'm not that way. That's not how I am.
Speaker: I don't do that. Why would I change? I asked you before what your email was. I have it, but I can't remember what it was. I texted it and I put it in the group chat. I'll send it to you on Twitch as well.
Speaker: And that's a huge, that's a, that's a huge, that's a huge thing right there is to A, acknowledge there's a problem and B, be willing to make a change or accept that you need to make a change. Uh, and that was, I think that's why, I think that's where, I think that's why I was where I was for so long for so many years was because I didn't
Speaker: I didn't think and I didn't know that something was wrong. Let alone if I did know I didn't care and I wasn't going to fucking change it because I'm a stubborn dickhead. So. You know, and that's what I said about Hosh, you know, Hosh got his got his got his body right and got his
Speaker: you know, started getting physically right. And now he's working on his mental well being. And then we got this guy, this guy, two hours late. Oh, I had to work. I was smoking meth with with family stuff. I was I was smoking some guy's meat. I mean, smoking meat on the grill. Grilling. What's going on with you, man?
Speaker: And then much just another week of work back from out of town, obviously. But, uh, well, a lot of work. Um, they're trying to, the branch manager is trying to see if he could get, uh, myself and my coworker back over there for like maybe a week or two weeks. Nice. Yeah. So I'm like, yeah, we're, I'm in. I have no problem with that.
Speaker: How's your week going? Crazy. Not crazy. That's so much crazy. I just, I got a weird work situation going on right now. So yeah, you're in the new building, right? Yeah, I'm in the new building. I love the new building. Um, I really liked the new building. I liked my new property manager. She's great so far. Um, the property is really cool.
Speaker: I love, I love where it's at. I don't like the drive. Uh, let me get one thing straight. I don't like driving from Newark to Columbus to downtown Columbus every day. It was about a 45 minute drive. And much like any major city, major metropolis, the traffic. Oh, poor thing. But I am in the district.
Speaker: So which arena district for those of you who don't know if you're not from Ohio nationwide arena is right across the street from my one building. That's where the Columbus Blue Jackets play our NHL team. Right behind my other building is Huntington Park, which is where the Columbus Clippers play, which is our minor league baseball team. They're Cleveland Indians are Cleveland Guardians minor league team.
Speaker: And then just kind of catty corner, a few blocks away from me is the brand new cruise stadium. And if you're anybody's a soccer fan, you know who the Columbus crew are. I think they're defending champs or they just won the championship again. And then I got Kimba live a couple of blocks down from me, which is a huge music venue. So I've got a lot of stuff going on.
Speaker: you know, perks of the job is I do have free parking if I ever go down there because we have a parking garage on my building. So, you know, I got free parking for, you know, where if I go down there for an event, you're looking at $20, $30 for parking. You know, I've already been told, hey, the board told me, hey, make sure you use that parking pass if you're ever down here for a hockey game because I was like, okay. Nice. But I like the area. I like, you know, I like the buildings.
Speaker: I'm not a big fan of residential, but these are all owned. All these condos are owned, so we don't do anything on the inside because they have to call and have plumbers come out if they have a plumbing issue or something like that or electrician or whatever. We're just there for the building and whatnot. So got to meet a lot of the residents. A lot of them are really nice. So I'm liking it. I'm liking it.
Speaker: Oh, weird situation going on with the company I work for. So, so I was saying, it's got to have been way and heavy on my mind for the last, uh, about a week and a half now. So that's all we were. I was talking about depression and going through depression and dealing with depression on a personal note tonight. Excuse me. And I said in this last week and a half or whatever.
Speaker: It's really had me reflecting and looking back on how, a, how far I've come. And at the same time, how bad I really was, you know, for all those years without, you know, ever a nobody ever going to a, what the hell's going on or be myself personally looking in the mirror going, you're a fucking mess, dude. Like you're fucking falling apart. I just, it just became so normal and such a,
Speaker: Uh, part of everyday life, like I said, it was, I almost flipped a switch and just became a robot. Everything I did was very routine. Get up, go to work, come home, eat dinner, play with the kids, go to bed, you know, very, very routine cycle and work. You know, when I was at work, it was almost scripted, no matter what I was doing. Yeah.
Speaker: It was just a script every day that played. Well, also too, I mean, just thinking back like with your parents and everything, like growing up, it was like routine to them, you know, and then their parents before them. I mean, like for my dad, it was just like work, sleep, to, you know, spend time with the fam back to work. My dad, my dad's like systematic. So it was just,
Speaker: I mean, because my I like as long as I've been alive, I have never, ever, ever recalled my dad taking a vacation. And when he did, he just stayed home. He didn't go anywhere, didn't plan. Oh, hey, we're going to go to Galveston or we're going to go to San Antonio to SeaWorld. None of that. Still to this day, as many times I've been to San Antonio, I have never gone to SeaWorld.
Speaker: I've been everywhere else in San Antonio. So, so, you know, I mean, I, I mean, it's just, um, you know, I, it's just kind of, they're just hardwired. It was just their generations. I mean, it's a generational thing that's been passed down. So to us, yeah, it does seem systematic and it's a routine, but however, though it's not all that bad, you can modify it. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, and that's, you know, you know, like even like we weren't, I was talking to, uh, I was talking to somebody about this the other day. I can't remember who it was. You know, I lived in Charleston for like 10 years. I never really got to fully experience or enjoy living in Charleston. Except for like the six or seven months I was there after my ex -wife and I split because
Speaker: Well, she never invited me out anywhere. I never went out with her and her friends I never you know the occasion I would go out with with her and the kids like the beach or whatever, you know There'd be a few times here and there where we would get together with friends or whatever But I never really got to do a lot of the things I wanted to do or because I was always working and I always dreaded I mean I took vacation I took one one week a month or one week a year one week a month
Speaker: one week a year and we would take the kids to like Disney or we would take them to, we took them to Legoland one year, we went to Disney, you know, we'd come back home to Ohio or whatever. But the downside was, cause all I did was work. And if I wasn't at work, I was just in my garage, you know, cause I didn't want to be around the outside world. So to say when I was at work, all I was doing was thinking, or when I was on vacation, all I was doing was thinking about work because
Speaker: when I worked at Ork and you didn't have somebody to cover your, your route for you while you were on vacation. So you kill yourself either the week leading up to your vacation. So you're freaking exhausted the entire week you're off or you don't. And then you know, when you come back from vacation, you're automatically two weeks behind. Yeah. So it's like, yeah, it wasn't until I came when I, when, when,
Speaker: I found out that I had to come back to Ohio. That's when I decided I was making some changes. A, I was no longer working myself to death. I was working 60, 70, 80 hours a week at Oregon. I'm not doing that anymore.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: So, because, you know, it's like the responsibility or the duty, if you will, it's like being the provider, the protector, the, you know, all these, all these roles in the household. So yeah. So yeah, guys work. I mean, I, I mean, I didn't see, I doubt where it's like when I was in the medical field, I was doing 60 hours a week, only one day off and on that day off, I slept and did laundry.
Speaker: And then, um, then like in the oil field, I mean, my rotation was 15 on six, uh, 15 on six days off, but I lose a day driving eight to nine hours to West Texas and back. So I'm only home for four days. And normally on the fourth, first day I'm back. I don't want it. I turned my phone off. I'm like, I'm asleep. I'm sleeping up on the whole day, but, but we're working.
Speaker: I mean, think about it. 15 days straight, 12 hour shifts, sometimes 14, and then up on top of that, the drive to, to location and from location. Exactly. So yeah. So yeah. I mean, and the guys still do it. I mean, I mean, hell, I mean, one of my, um, one of the field supervisors, I mean, this guy's like 68 years old and was doing circles around me.
Speaker: He's like, and he's in there like, come on, come on, city slicker. Let's go. Let's go city boy. And I'm just like, how am I yesterday? But the thing about it was I never bitched or moment of complaint as much as he belittled me, as much as he talked down to me, as much as he insulted me. But the fact that I just said, yes, sir. Yes, sir. And I just kept giving him that respect. And he just go. And when we got off of work, we got back to the hotel we were staying at.
Speaker: Because we live that man that man camp hotel life Mm -hmm, but we got back to the hotel and at the bar I'm just sitting by myself and the next to know he just throws up He just has a bottle of I mean they joke the rest of the guys joke make a little bolto Which I tease them about but he knew what I was drinking because he saw what I was drinking So he just went up there boom shining a bucket he goes he gave he bought me two bottles and he just goes
Speaker: You're OK, kid. And I was like, thank you, sir. Get that acceptance. It's crazy because for me, whether I was doing construction, building houses, doing remodels, doing heavy equipment, building maintenance, whatever, work's always been an escape from reality for me. Because even though I was going through the motions and it was a routine,
Speaker: It was one of the few places where my brain shut off. And I didn't think about all the, you know, problems at home, problems with my marriage, financial stuff, whatever. And that's kind of where the, what the gym became for me as well. When, when, when I was down in Charleston and I started going to the gym, that was, I could literally put my headphones on and crack my music up. And I didn't think about anything. Yeah.
Speaker: I think that's why I hit the gym so hard. I was going for two hours in the morning, two hours at night. And it was just, it was just an escape from reality. But at the end of the day, it really didn't do much for me because, you know, as soon as I stepped back out into my car, we got an encounter. Reality slapped me right back in the face. So, you know, like you said, you know, it's just part of our, our, our genetic makeup. And I said that earlier as men, you know, we do, you, we, we carry the weight of the world on our shoulders.
Speaker: even when we don't have to, you know what I mean? We have that. Yeah. We have to be, we have to make sure we're financially stable. We have to make sure that we're providing, that we're protecting that, you know, kids, everything they need, you know, our significant other has everything they need. We have a roof over our head. There's food in our bellies, clothes on our backs, blah, blah, blah. Even when things are going good, we still have that in the back of our mind of, am I doing enough? I could be doing more.
Speaker: Yeah. And also too, and what I've also observed, like me growing up in the city and seeing how the guys in the city work, you know, the guys that are, you know, they got their college degree and, and then they got their, you know, like they're kind of, if their family owned a company or they're apart somewhere, fill the issue with the company, how they could just easy got that first -class ticket in, which is fine. I ain't knocking that, but I just see how those guys like, Oh yeah, I'll just pay somebody to do it. I'll pay somebody else.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: The guys that are calling are guys like you and me. So yeah, that was like one thing I've observed. Like guys that were born and raised in the city and have that, that, that good choice. I would say that choice is your life versus born with a silver spoon in your mouth. Yeah. Hey Connor, but then, you know, then, you know, guys like us, you know, we're,
Speaker: We're blue collar. We're like, all right, we'll get it to you. Well, yeah. And that's the thing. Like I grew up with guys and I'm still friends with some of them to this day, um, who's family owned massive farms and they are, you would look at them and you wouldn't know, but they're millionaires. But every day they're up at the ass crack of dawn and they're out there until the sun goes down. They're working the fields. They're working the animals. They're, they're working, you know,
Speaker: Reparent shit on the farm. They're still you know, they're still putting in hard work every single day But they honestly they really don't have to it's just a mentality that that you're brought up with and these are guys who are like
Speaker: 5th 4th and 5th generation farmers, maybe even at this point 6th generation farmers, especially yeah, especially like barbecue. I mean like Russia. I mean, because we have we have a like we have a lot of barbecue spots. A lot of family owned restaurants. Like their great great grandparents ran, you know, started it up and then they they're like on the 4th generation running running the shop because it was just kind of like their their continuing legacy.
Speaker: So a lot of them didn't go to college or probably if they did, I believe like financial, you know, that way they keep, keep the business going, you know, but, um, but yeah, I mean, it's just, it's just, it's hard wired. No, that's, and that's why I said, you know, one of the, one of the many changes that I, that I made for myself when, when, when I came back home to Ohio and, um,
Speaker: And like I said, I had no choice in the matter. I had no say coming back to Ohio. And it's just my ex said she was coming back with the kids and I'm like, well, I'm not gonna be 12 hours away from my kids. So that's not the type of dad I am. But when I came back home, I said, hey, I'm not working 60, 70, 80 hours a week anymore. I'm taking my weekends. I wanna have that time to unwind.
Speaker: Uh, not only that, since I've been home, I've been blessed with, you know, the few companies I've been with that I've had good vacation time. Uh, when I first got home and one of the first jobs I had was at Abercrombie and I, day one, I started, uh, they start you out with 25 days of vacation and I'm still in this. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You worked at Abercrombie.
Speaker: Yeah, I worked at the at the headquarters. I worked at the DC's. You you khaki wearing sweater vest looking motherfucker. I was I was I was actually security. I wore my blue jeans in my boots and I had an. No, no, no, no, no, no, that I don't want to hear that you wore that khaki pants a sweater vest you. I got pictures. I wore my boots in my blue jeans and I actually have one of my security shirts in there because every year they do a big concert for
Speaker: for the camp that they have. They have camps for kids, but they do, it's called the challenge. And every year since I quit, they still call me to come and help with the challenge. So I've kept one of my shirts for that every year. I have one, it's just an Abercrombie pole that says security across the back and it's got security embroidered on the chest. No, they tried to tell me I had to wear, I had to wear Abercrombie jeans. However, they realized real quick, they don't make Abercrombie jeans in size Sasquatch.
Speaker: So I was allowed to wear my own jeans. I was in security, so we didn't have to, we didn't. Now, however, I will say I do have quite a bit of Hollister and Abercrombie stuff in my, in my closet. Great. It's just like t -shirts and hoodies and, you know, so I got some boxers and stuff. And sweater vest. I don't have a sweater vest. Wait, do I have a sweater vest? Hold on a second.
Speaker: No, I don't. I don't. I think you know what? I'm going to have to look and see. I don't think I have a sweater. I do have a t -shirt. I'll wait. Go ahead. Go look for it. I'll wait. I don't think I do. I'll be 100 % honest with you. If I find what I'll bring you that. I don't think I have a quarter of it. Hey, Brian, how's it going, man? Pretty good. How's it going?
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. We can't complain, man. We're doing all right. We're doing all right. We are definitely blessed. Yeah. He's actually got a sweater vest. She pointed out where it was. No, I don't have one in here. I thought you did. Yeah, let me see. I have sweaters. I have a turtleneck, but that's South Pole. I've had that in years. Sure.
Speaker: Oh, hey, Connor. So this had to wear for work, Brian. This is a polo. And it's actually it's not even it's freaking Hollister. So yeah, but I don't have a sweater vest. Nikki, he wants a sweater vest.
Speaker: I didn't think about that. Oh, top flight security of the world, Craig. The world. He wants a sweater vest. Yeah, we need to go start up a GoFundMe and just be like sweater vest for Glick. Hey, khaki pants. And some aviator sunglasses. With some polo boat shoes.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah. Get him as close to Paul Blart as we can possibly get him. Oh, we are terrible, Brian. Look, this is why Glick shouldn't leave us unattended with his show. I tried the sweater vest one time. Didn't work. But then for some reason, like my aunt, when I remember
Speaker: for my birthday and Christmas, which sucks is because like my birthday's in December. So I get two gifts a month, you know, for the month. And I even had a cardigan at one time and I'm like, what the hell is this? Right. Well, I don't even know what that is. Cardigan sweater. I wore that like for church and school photos.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: Connor and I worked together. We got two sexiest underwear models on. I don't want to brag or anything, but... Connor, you look like that guy from the subway commercials, the one that's in jail. Hoss? Yes. Where's your face? Where's your one garden? I'm kind of... Hold on. Hold on. I'll show you. Hold on. Give me just a second. Oh, man.
Speaker: But I think we should like start a GoFundMe. Get started GoFundMe. Being a little spoon is the best, sorry. Yes, it is. I love it. Squeak, Brian. Squeak. Ee, ee, ee. Now, what I was saying about working at Everett had Everett around me.
Speaker: was when I started there, you know, we had 25 days of vacation time. And when they told me that I flat out taught him, I said, what the hell am I going to do with 25 days? I don't take vacation. And my boss was like, you're going to take them now. Cause you got 25 of them to use. And sure as shit, man, I came in one day, we were getting close to the end of the year. And if you didn't use it, you lose it. And I came in and my boss was like,
Speaker: I was looking at your vacation time and I was like, yeah, he's like, uh, I'll see you in two weeks. Okay. What am I in trouble? He's like, no, you're on vacation. Have fun. We'll see you in two weeks. I was like, okay. I didn't know what to do. I just went home. Well, wouldn't an option be to cash out your vacay and work on your vacay? There's, there's no, there was no cash out option.
Speaker: What are you doing? Oh, I'm I'm laying in bed. What are you doing? Shut up, bro. I love it. One of them better look at that. What a situation in your eyes. Excuse me. No, the front spot. It's Jake from State Farm.
Speaker: What are you wearing? Underwear. That's lost right now. What are you wearing? The second one you'll love. Won't you be my neighbor?
Speaker: That's a snazzy sweater right there. I think I can pull that off. Bro, you would look like fucking Carlton Banks if he was ever white. I swear. I mean, but think about it though. I mean, like, look, it'll fit Drake over shoulders perfectly. The color's good. A bat blends in with the beard, accentuates his eyes. And then you can wear the side holsters on the side underneath your dress coat.
Speaker: I mean, if Connor had one too, if Connor wore one too, he'd be like, hi, I'm tech support. Thank you for calling tech support. Thank you for calling gig squad. My name is Connor. Help me help you. Fuck you, buddy. I'm going to get 10 out of five.
Speaker: Well, let me see. Here we go. Roger's make it look like you went to a to a freaking frat school. Bella Academy, exactly. Now, now this, however, this, however, I will rock. I will rock this one. Oh, that's pretty nice, Brian.
Speaker: That is clean. Oh, I could rock that. Yeah, that I was going to say that that I can that I can get down with. Yeah, what is it address? That's one of those Victorian steampunk type type formal vests. Oh, I wanted one of those because you can wear it because because like those type of vest, you can wear that with jeans, you can wear that with black slacks, khakis, that vest would go with anything.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: That's more like Doc Holliday. That's what I meant. Yeah. Hey, Jeeves. I'll be your huckleberry. Oh yeah. There we go. I like the blue. That's nice. Oh yeah. Yeah. For like my, like my best friend's wedding for, I paid for like my
Speaker: way to pay for like the white guys. But yeah, I paid for the tuxedos and the tuxedos we had were like zoot suits, but like the vest, the color vest and everything was like that bandana print. That's hot. And it was all purple. It was like, yeah, we had that with the, with the bow ties and everything. It was all dude is baller.
Speaker: Say what you want about the zoo. Say what you want about the zoo suit, but the zoo suit rocks. It plays. I've always, I've always wanted to wear one. Like I've never had a reason to wear one. I've always wanted one. Nicki said, no, no zoo suits allowed. Oh man. No, no, no, no. The zoo suit plays. You know what? When it's y 'all's anniversary, y 'all go out, you wear it. You know, matter of fact, you wear that on your wedding day.
Speaker: Yeah, right. I'm thinking about making that last vest there. Show attire. That's mandatory dress code. We got to get one in every color so you can wear it on the show. Yeah, another rule. I get to break. Yeah.
Speaker: We're professionals here. We gotta look good. It's not always about men's but it's also about men's fashion. We want you guys to not only have your mind right but have your fashion right as well. I got a pair of jeans. It's got the crotch that kind of sticks out about, you know, three inches or so. Let me know. I need some inspiration. You know what I mean? Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, no, no, no, no, we can't get. So can while he's doing that, can I read you what I got in the mail today? Yeah, you so so you you said you said you sent me a text and said something on some real shit. Check this out. I was like, what am I looking at? You're like, I'll just come up on the show if you don't care. All right. So this is from a nonprofit. Hold on.
Speaker: Oh God, this has nothing to do with anything. It's like some like weird political thing. Okay. So this is from a nonprofit organization called RIP medical. It says we are writing to share you good news. You no longer own medical debts listed in the corner of this. And it's a damn near $2 ,000 hospital bill.
Speaker: Yeah. Uh, no strings attached gift. It said, if I did tell my story on how great they were, they were going to send me an Amazon gift card for 50 bucks. But, uh, Randy was telling me, man, she's like, I was like, who would do that? And she says it doesn't matter who would do something like that. It's the fact that if you do good to do good things to good people, good things come back on you. I agree. I agree 100%.
Speaker: but I don't know how none of that how none of that played out. I knew nothing about any of it. I don't even know how my information got out there. Probably like the algorithm. That's wild, dude. Like I have no earthly idea who would who would even contact somebody like that. Yeah, no, that's that's kind of crazy, but I mean, **** if they're gonna
Speaker: if it's a legit thing and they're legitimately taking care of the, uh, medical bills. Fuck. I wouldn't argue it. No, hell no, man. I'm grateful for that man. Cause with my four kids, dude, I can't afford health insurance. You know, all my shit comes straight out of pocket for my medicine, my doctor visits, everything. And I can't afford it.
Speaker: you and then you gotta go. If I gotta go to the ER with some bad **** that don't you know what I mean? I that's that's 10 grand minimum right there at the minimum. That's why I mean, that's wild man. I'm I'm grateful. I really am. Hell yeah, dude. Like I said, I mean, as long as it's like a
Speaker: legit thing. Hell yeah, man. That's fucking awesome. You can't beat them. They've been around since like 2014. I think that's what the website said. Yeah. No, I mean, just in today's day and age, man, you just, you got to be. Excuse me. You've got to be so careful. Yeah.
Speaker: you know what the scams and the scam artists and there's so many of them out there that sounds so damn legit or sound real and then next thing you know you're you're in a worse situation than you were prior to prior to it but no that's that's that's like the legit thing and it's legit taking care of fuck yeah man no uh you know
Speaker: medical insurance for family is no joke. You guys, I don't even want to tell you how much I spend comes out of my paycheck. Every, every, every paycheck for, for insurance. It's for me and my kids, bro. It's like $500 a week that comes out of my shit. And I can't, I can't afford $500 a week. And then on top of rent and lights and all that stuff, man, there's no way.
Speaker: go work at Mickey D's, man. They're making like $40 an hour now, apparently. Yeah. Mickey D's can't handle me. That was an entry -level job that was not meant to become a career. And these motherfuckers are like, we want more money. We want more money. Bitch, go get a real job. You are going to acknowledge it. And then replace them with themself. Check out kiosk. There's your pay raise right there, buddy.
Speaker: Yeah, you can't, you can't put, you can't take a piece of bread, put a cheeseburger or put a patty on there, put a piece of cheese on there, put some pickles and some mustard in another piece of bread on top of it. You're lucky you make what you make your goofy ass, figure out how to make a cheeseburger and then you can get more money. Yeah. Look, if you want $15 an hour, listen here, my, my burgers better come out looking like they do on the commercials. Exactly.
Speaker: I think I did one way back when but uh I did a live stream on I think it was on half so it was about like work ethic is that a thing of the past I think I think it really is I think it is but I also at the same time I I think it's because the this newer generation ain't gonna sit around and be treated like shit
Speaker: the role of
Speaker: I would consider it, but then I said, but at the same time where I'm at right now, I'm in a good spot right now because with my job, like they'll, they send me places to work, like different locations. Like this past week, I was in Georgetown, Georgetown, Texas, which is like 30 minutes north of Austin, Texas. I never, as many times I've been to Austin, I'd never been to Georgetown. And then last year, last year they flew me out to Phoenix and then they, and then a few months later they flew me out to Birmingham.
Speaker: So, I mean, but it's, it's like, it's, it's like, I'm in a good spot with my job. And one of the guys, he's no longer with the company anymore because he just, uh, went woking and went broke. But, uh, but he was, he was, he was always all like, they get like, I'm, I'm playing, you know, like I'm kissing ass or whatever, or they're thinking like they're playing favoritism and I keep telling them, I said, well,
Speaker: the the
Speaker: he was complaining he what he wanted to get paid more but he only had one job versus me like forklift operator clamp operator cherry picker operator loading and unloading shipping and receiving transfers driver it's like really my seven to your one job really you want my salary and that's the thing I mean
Speaker: That's the mentality with with with the with the generation today is you know, they come out of college No, no work experience nothing like that and they think they should automatically be making six plus figures a year and it's like a lie to Yeah, I was like, well you You know, it's like I had a cat that I was talking to he just he just left our company and you
Speaker: went to another company and he was like well you know since I'm leaving and I know we're not technically supposed to talk about this but uh uh how much how much do you get paid now and I told him he's like wow really and how long have you been here I was like two years he's like wow he's like and that's one of the reasons I believe it and I was like well I've also you're 28 dude you've been here for eight years like you had no experience whatsoever
Speaker: I've also been doing this line of work now for 20 plus years. Yeah, your experience and tenure. My resume and my experience speaks for itself. You don't have that because you came in here with no knowledge, nothing like that. They trained you. You've been here ever since.
Speaker: You've used that eight years as a stepping stone because you're moving on and you're going to make more money. But yeah, you shouldn't, you know, if they bring in a kid fresh from high school and he was making as much money as I'm making right now, I'd be pissed. Oh man, like, like my nephew makes more than I do. My nephew is like 23, 24. He makes more than I do because he went ahead and he works with my older brother and he went ahead and did an apprenticeship doing HVAC.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: All right. No, I wish I wish when I wish I could go back in time and tell. Well, there's a lot of things that I would tell 16 year old me like, hey, who's going to win the Super Bowl for the next 20 some years? But outside of that, I would say, hey, dummy, when those apprenticeship programs come up, don't be an asshole and take one of them. I wish I would be. And I know I had the opportunity to get like a state union apprenticeship, but I was like, I don't want to be a plumber the rest of my life.
Speaker: Had I done it, I'd be required with a stack of money. Yeah, you definitely got the, the, the ass for a plumber. I mean, I mean, I mean, if, if I could go back in time, when people, when people ask me that, like, if you could change anything, what would you change? And I said, not getting injured in the first place, because if I was injury free, I'd be in the military right now. I'd be in the Marine Corps.
Speaker: Yeah, they're very sad. And then I was like, as I get in on time, I was like, that's one. Two, stay focused on this girl and not divert and go after this girl. Yeah, no. A 60 -year -old Glick, I know you love baseball, and I know you love football, but listen to me. Like I said by the bell, go back in time, be like, time out. And I'll be like, let me pick myself up and shift over here.
Speaker: Yes. Yeah. I get a 100%. Cause that's what kept me out. Well, yeah, that's what kept me out of the military was injuries. Not only that, but I also wasn't going to get to do the job that I originally wanted to do, but again, I knew that before the whole medical thing. And I was like, ah, no big deal. Cause I wanted to be a ranger, but I was the sole survivor of my family.
Speaker: So thanks a lot again. Thanks again, Private Ryan and your idiot brothers. I don't want to be in the NATO military. You know what I mean? I want to be in the real, the real military, not that NATO crap.
Speaker: I mean, like, I mean, I mean for me though, uh, cause like when, when I took it and, and I said before, like my, when I took my ASVAB test and everything, and then my recruiters like, wow, you're mainly mechanical. I said, because like wood shopping, auto shop was like my other than football. Woodshop, woodshop, auto shop was my therapeutic outlet. Yeah. Football was my aggressive outlet. Right.
Speaker: So, but it was just like, that was my outlet and everything, but then mainly like auto shop because I was that much of a gear head. And, and my dad was all like, well, you know, if you're going to pick a job, pick something you'll take when you retire out. And I'm like, well, okay, well, mechanics. So yeah, I'll like, I'll learn, you know, I'll go to school for mechanical engineering and just be a mechanical engineer.
Speaker: And, um, but yeah, every, I passed everything at the map at the, uh, maps office for the, for the Marine Corps. And then apparently though, it's just, they wanted a second opinion, even though my orthopedic surgeon said he was great to, that I was good to go. I passed the test, all the physicals and all that other stuff, but the military are like, well, you're at risk. And that's what they told me. Cause even my recruiter was like, you can take anybody you want from any branch and I bet you he can run circles around them.
Speaker: like well it's not that the fact is I broke my ankle twice two years in a row I had a torn ACL in my knee and bust up knee and a bust up shoulder the risk is there if I move wrong and we're in you know we're in battle or something like that and I move wrong and I re -injure that ankle or I re -injure my knee or something like that you know or if I'm in
Speaker: bootcamp or something like that. So it was just like, all right. Well, you know, cause I had already decided I was going to do combat engineering. I'm like, I'm already in construction. Why not just continue? And I can still do my military career. Cause my goal was to do years in the military and just, that was going to be my career. Yeah. I was, I was thinking about doing like 25 to 30 and that way you like retire with full benefits. We're still like, you know, I mean, think about it.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: in a weird, in a weird army gang bang with a bunch of his buddies. And then he's like, the boys, then he gets, he gets full disability in retirement. There's high on the hog. The rest of his life. That was a top secret mission on a need to know basis. So Connor gave, so Connor gave humvee a whole new meeting.
Speaker: the
Speaker: but then I found out later through my older brother, he would, he, if, it's just that, like to be frank, I mean, my brother caught the case of the pussy and never got, never recovered. So she'd be like, oh no, you know, I'll take care of you. And he was like, okay. But then when he had his mental breakdown, he's like, I should've, he was like, I should've left. I should've left. I should've just went ahead, gone back to the hotel. So that way the next morning I'm on that bus to the Marine Corps. And I'm like, wait, what? He goes,
Speaker: Yeah. He goes, I would have been the first Marine. Then you would have been second. I went, really? He said, yeah, he was, but he was, he said he was like 17 at that time. And at that time, you know, my dad signed off on it that he could go, but he was seeing this girl and then there's, you know, you know, one thing led to another that he was just like, can't leave her. I can't leave her, but it's, but now he's like, man, I should have left.
Speaker: yet are a woman ruining plans and so
Speaker: the the
Speaker: And then also I'm like, well, damn, there goes that way. I mean, because after that, like after my injury, I didn't take, I didn't take school. I like pretty much, I mean, I was like honor roll. I was an honor roll student. And then I just kind of like didn't care anymore. So when football season came around, I just only did enough just to pass, you know, cause you go out of the progress report to play for the whole season. So, so I did that. So I did that and I played all four years.
Speaker: And then I'm like, okay, well, apparently I'm not going to go to college ball. My GPA, you know, plummeted. So I'm like, you know what? I'm going to go to the military. And then, and then military said, no, that really put me into depression. Cause I trained my ass off for that. I mean, I was like 195 pounds. That was the best shape I've ever been. They're talking about, I need to be 180. I'm like, I don't know anybody that I could take tips from being bulimic. Yeah. Right.
Speaker: You know, and I'm like, I'm like, I'm a football player. I'm a wrestler. I mean, like, yeah, I got the build, you know, cause that's what you do when you play sports. So, but, and then what really set me over the edge was like, you know, the 2000, 2001 of granted 9 11 that happened. So then I'm like, I, I, at first I wanted to fight, but then I'm like, no, you know what? They didn't want me. So I'm like, you know what? I'm a step out. And then, and then, um, that's funny that you say that because.
Speaker: That same exact thing happened to me. And that was my exact same mentality was, uh, no, I like, I was, I was, I'm gonna be 100%. I was butt hurt as hell. Y 'all didn't want me a year ago because you said that I wasn't, I couldn't medically be cleared, but now you're beating my door down. And at the time I'm an 18 year old kid making $30 an hour.
Speaker: doing concrete work, I was a concrete finisher, and I fucking love my job. And I'm like, No, I'm good. Like, first and foremost, I'll never see the front line. I can't actually do the job I want to do. I'm already doing the job that you that you guys let me do. And I'm making way more money than I'm going to make with you guys. So no,
Speaker: You know, I'm already knowing what I know now. I'm glad that I got disappointed with the no, we don't. Because I didn't why why should I want why why should you want me when you didn't want me then? You know, fuck you, you know? Yeah, but I mean, but I mean, but it it it it sent me into depression and then it just kind of like left me in a flux like, well, what do I do now? You know, I was like already my my dream of playing college ball and going to the pros gone.
Speaker: And then, you know, I was like wrestling, you know, I wanted to go wrestling like, cause they had like one star, one star, uh, one star wrestling, which is like the independent circuit, but they want it. They wanted guys over six feet. I'm under six feet. So I'm like, well, damn, that sucks. So that's like.
Speaker: two strikes and then then I, then I'm like, then I get denied by the military, you know, get it out by the military. That's like three strikes. It's like, man, what? And I'm like, man, I'm not even good for the military after I trained my ass off or the best shape I've ever been in my life. And they told me, no, they said I was too heavy. They said I was too heavy. I'm like, I'm like, uh, yo, brother, you know, I know a guy that would take you.
Speaker: No, I mean, I'm 43, man. I'm past that. I'm past. But I mean, but, but then, then like, uh, I think it was like 2004, 2005. Then you got like the P90X craze coming out and the next, you know, muscle fitness, they're like going arm the, the, the soldiers defending our freedom. And you got a guy from the army, all branches, and they're all jacked. And I just went mother. That's it. I'm done.
Speaker: I was so, I was heated, man. They didn't say anything about my size. I was, I was about three something, but I was built, you know, I was, I was a solid 300 plus.
Speaker: You know, but yeah, it was it's so wild to hear you. It's like I'm almost like looking in one of those carnival circus and mirrors where it's like a shorter Mexican version of me telling the same story because so I got denied for the military. The second time I broke my ankle. I was told I couldn't play baseball in college.
Speaker: Which I had planned on doing I didn't even want to go to college. I just want to go play sports I knew I wasn't smart enough to go to college. I was gonna get a goddamn business to business management or some whatever that easy -ass course was I just wanted to go play baseball and try to play football Huh? Well most arrested is a real work Regardless, I you tell her hush up over where it isn't but um, so like
Speaker: Military went to shit. I was like, well, you know, I've always wanted to become a cop. I'll become a cop. Well, somebody couldn't pass the psychological evaluation. Imagine that army would want some crazy person like that. Like, honestly, like, wouldn't you not? Well, no, the police department, I couldn't pass the psychological evaluation. But if you can become a police officer, so the injuries kept me out of the military.
Speaker: My mental state kept me out from being, I always wanted to be a cop. That was like, I'm going to go combat engineer. And then I want to eventually do MP. And then when I, yeah, combat engineering, it was like mechanical engineering, aeronautical engineering, combat engineering, and then there was intelligence. And then there was something else. Yeah. I was like, yeah. Yeah. So, and then it was like, well, not going to college.
Speaker: not playing baseball with, and I had the opportunity to play football. I don't know how, I don't think I would have ever gone pro, but I, you know, the opportunity was there, but I was like, well, not doing that, not going to the military, not joining the police. And I was kind of the same mindset. It was just like my whole, like my senior year was just like, fuck, what do I do now? Yeah. So, and just be a, you know, I love my job. I love what I do. I've, I've, I've learned a lot through the years being in construction and, and, you know,
Speaker: I, you know, I'm that guy. I'm the jack of all trades, master of none at the end of the day. You know, I've done everything. I've done electrical plumbing, drywall and roofing concrete excavated. You know, I was heavy equipment operator. I purposely and intentionally stayed away from HVAC because it's an absolute pain in the fucking ass. It pays great, but it's, meaning he can't fit in attics.
Speaker: and and he's afraid of heights
Speaker: What the hell am I going to do now? This is, this is my life. This is, this is my life. I'm a construction guy. I'm a blue collar worker for the rest of my life. Here it is. You know, and I didn't get the opportunity of working at Oregon. Surprisingly, believe it or not. I fucking love that job. I never thought in a million years, I would enjoy being a bug killer, but it was a great job in the skills that I have in the construction field. What's that? I could call you Dale.
Speaker: You can call me Dale. I worked for working for about eight, nine years. Yeah, man. I got them roaches. That's awesome. No, I mean, I mean, yeah, I mean it, but, but, but, but yeah, you know, like with the blue collar jobs, I mean, you're, when you get set up with a good crew, then it's like, man, what am I mad about? I'm like,
Speaker: I mean, like, right now, with where I'm at right now working, I mean, like, I love my crew. And that's, like, the only thing is, as much bullshit I deal with on my personal life, but, like, when I gotta work, I'm, like, with my crew, I'm like, man, I'm happy as hell. I act like I'm 20 all over again.
Speaker: acting all immature and shit but you know it's like we're all having fun we all like the time passes by and everything but I mean it was just even even along the docks like during my like uh when I was denied by the military and all this other stuff like working doing landscaping and all that other stuff working with crews I mean it's like wow oil field even working at the the warehouse at hospitals working with good crews it's like life doesn't suck
Speaker: So, but I mean, but, you know, it's just when you're working with good crews and everything, I mean, really, I mean, even though the bills, yeah, and the money and all that, but overall though, what's really more important, like your happiness and your sanity or money? Yeah, I'm not going to go much longer. Yeah, I was about to say, you beat me to it.
Speaker: for every time I heard that. but I mean, but but yeah, I mean, but like when when you're working with a good crew and everything, you're like, man, what's more happy? Like it like like I asked, what's more happier? Like your sanity and happiness or money? That's true. Yeah. So, I mean, yeah, like with the with the good crew, like, man, I'm
Speaker: And then on top of that, doing what I do right now, I'm like, man, I get to travel. And then during the day, it's business. But then that night, it's a vacation. So I've had jobs right now where I traveled for work. And that was always really cool, especially if, like you said, you've got a good crew. You've got a good group of guys that you work with, which is always nice too.
Speaker: kind of helps with that shit upstairs when you're dealing with stuff. If you got a good, good, good place to work or a good crew to work with. But when I was going out of town and working out of town and stuff like that, a lot, we had a good crew with us. So we would, you know, we, we would hang out after work, we'd go to the bar, we'd go out to eat, we'd, you know, play cards in each other's rooms, you know, whatever, play Euchre or whatever. Um, and just kind of hang out and, and, you know, uh,
Speaker: decompress or, you know, whatever from the day. And, you know, especially if we were out of town for weeks at a time, we weren't working on the weekends. So we just all hung out together. Yeah. And it made it nice. Yeah. And then, I mean, like last week, the whole time I was out in Georgetown, like we bust asked during the day, we worked from seven to five and, uh, we, since we got done, we went ahead and get a, we went ahead and got a bite to eat.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: Oh, yeah, so I mean yeah, so I mean like I said, it was it was fun. It was a fun week Nikki said I love San Antonio Oh, yeah, Connor was out there in the Air Force Eat it What'd you say Chris? He's in the Air Force now he's on vacation in Italy or France or some shit for the next five years
Speaker: No, 2025. I enjoy a lot of Texas, but the only part of Texas I don't like is like the southern border and all the big cities. Everything else is, I love it. I hate. So, you know, like, you know, like where the border is at on the south side.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: Yeah, basically the same thing. Whoa. You literally spit into Juarez, Mexico. And it stinks. It is a shithole. Weren't you down? Whoa, Paz. Well, whoa. You said you were down south, weren't you, Connor? Yeah, it was an El Paso. That's East Texas.
Speaker: I know West Texas, West Texas. It's also, it's also a border town. Yeah. Like, Oh my God, you drive down the town. There were signs that said, uh, watch for, watch for falling people. No, I mean, no, no, literally though, like in El Paso, they have the state troopers patrolling the board. They, they have the wall, they have like their wall set up in El Paso and there's like literally state troopers and, and a national guard patrolling that wall.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: and if you like mediocre towns that's your yeah that's your only camouflage
Speaker: You're like his wife. You're his wife. Connor. Connor. Shit. Boom. Right in the right in the snow. Keep it out like a snowman. Like, beep, beep. I can see your hair. Damn it. I caught her. She can't hear you.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: So that's, that's, yeah. Talk all the mad shit you want about Dallas for you have free reign, but all the other towns, all the other towns, I will defend Dallas is horrible. I have a buddy of mine who, uh, who works for the TSA. He's from, he's from Michigan. He's from Lake, Lake Sinclair, uh, Detroit, Lake Sinclair area. And, uh, he got the job with the TSA up in Michigan. And then a couple of months after he got the job, they're like, Hey, we're
Speaker: transfer you to Texas, you cool with that? And he's like, I guess he's in Austin. And he, he, and I've heard a lot about Austin. I would like to visit Austin. I think I would like the, the music scene, the food scene, the, the stuff I got, but he got down there and he was down there for a couple of months and we were talking. He was like, dude, he's like, click. He was like, you come down here. You're never going to fucking leave. He was like, this place is made for you. He's like the music down here.
Speaker: the food is phenomenal he said you'll never fucking leave
Speaker: the thing
Speaker: But yeah, but the food the food you'll love I mean and then the surrounding cities. I mean you have Round Rock Georgetown All the other small towns. I mean they're grabbing me the food is great. My lot of mom -and -pop shops quiet and peaceful It's really cool And since you're a barbecue lover the best barbecue right now that's rated number one is in Austin Franklin's barbecue
Speaker: the U .S. the U .S.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: the the the the the
Speaker: Oh wow. So, so this guy, so this guy, he's from Cairo, Cairo, Egypt, and he's been in the States for like little over 10 years, but he's been studying under every type of different pit master. So now he has his own barbecue spot. That's a food truck. And, um, but basically it's Texas barbecue, but with an Egyptian twist. I don't know. I have no idea what that means, but I am intrigued and kind of want to try it.
Speaker: the the the the the
Speaker: It is Africa, but it's essentially it's it's the Middle East. If you take Egypt's. If you take a left in Africa and then a quick right at Egypt, you're in the Middle East. Listen, no, if you take Egypt's like climate, it's that's the Middle East. Well, it's it's a desert country. So it's the same thing. Yeah, they're the same thing. Now the states between the eastern Africa and the Middle East.
Speaker: I've only been to a handful of states here in the United States, and I've never been outside of the United States. I'm surprised. That's not a part of your calling card there. I have been to the UK. So UK and Mexico.
Speaker: I mean, like, like, like the UK was pretty cool. London, London was, was fun. It's just people walk too fast in London, but it seemed like you don't move as fast as them. You got stumpy little legs.
Speaker: and Scotland and Ireland and certain parts of the UK and whatnot. I think that'd be my problem. I would probably walk off the side of a cliff because I'm staring at a fucking capsule. It's just architecture is amazing. Yeah, that's how my grandmother broke her arm on a cruise ship. But I mean, but, uh, still downstairs. Oh, my gosh. You're not going to climb a cliff to chase a goat. Jesus.
Speaker: the the the the the the the
Speaker: You know what makes my life a whole hell of a lot easier. I don't have to worry about getting, getting like Snoop Dogg. Murder kit was the case that they gave me. I was like, she was chasing fucking goats. I don't know what the hell the problem was. She fell off the side of a cliff. One less wedding for you to pay for. She's, she's convincing alligators going to eat me more in New Orleans. She doesn't understand that I won't poop it on its Snoop.
Speaker: come home with alligator boots. She's going to have a new alligator purse. As Steve Irwin said, alligators are just frogs with teeth. And a long ass tail. Yeah. Don't worry about the tail. Don't worry about the tail. You should be more comfortable.
Speaker: No, I mean, but but like like what the UK was cool just seeing all the architecture and everything and then going to the Winston Churchill bunker during World War II actually taking a tour down there and in all honesty though man like listening to all this stuff going on I'm like I felt like I was being lied to in school. Well, there's a well and especially nowadays, you know, the history has been washed and they only tell you what they want to tell you.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: I mean, but the thing about it is it's like, okay, but learn from the history. Yes. We had done some bad shit, just like in the middle East, they've done bad shit that they have to deal with. I mean, I mean, like Africa and the middle East, they were big on slavery. So there you go. There's your, there's your origin of slavery right there. Every race has been a slave at some point.
Speaker: Yeah. I mean, white people were slaves. I mean, they built the pyramids, the Great Wall of China. I mean, think about it when you were a slave building the wall. And if you died building the slave, I mean, if you died while you're a slave building the building, the Great Wall, guess what? The wall got built over you on top of you. So you're but you could be like you give fall, fall to your death on the wall. And they're like, oh, fuck it. Boom. Add more blocks to you on top of your body. So imagine how
Speaker: Imagine how many bodies are under that the Great Wall is on top of. Oh, yeah. So there you go. Then on top of that, you got the stuff going on, the North Korea. Then you got stuff going on in Mongolia for a while till that got thrown out the books, thrown out the way. Mongolia had their issues.
Speaker: the old
Speaker: the Americans set a break up text to England and said, we're no longer a thing, have a nice life. And then like in Asia, like in Cambodia and Vietnam, they even made a movie about it called The Killing Fields.
Speaker: So I mean, it's like every culture has suffered. And then they want to talk about we're the most country that's oppressed. Like, uh, apparently you guys haven't traveled close, not even close. There's still countries out there who are still involved in the slave trade and still have slaves to this day in 2024. So, I mean, we removed ourselves from that country three years ago.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: But it's, it's, you know, it's history is history. I mean, you. That's the thing. We just, we just gotta make, we just gotta make peace with the past. Like, yeah, it happened. Suck it up, get over it. We've come a long way from now, from then till now, we've come a great long way. All we could do is what can we do to make it better? Quit living in the past, quit bringing up the past. Just acknowledge that. Yeah. Bad shit happened. Okay.
Speaker: that's kind of, I mean, that's, that's kind of, you know, it's funny that you say that it kind of brings it right back around to the whole purpose of Monday night shows. Personally, you know, when we, when we take on this challenge to be better in our, in our own rights, mentally and stuff like that, we have to eventually let go of the path to stop living there. Yeah. Let it go. Let it go.
Speaker: It's a matter of not dwelling on it and letting it have control or power over you. And that's the problem with the world history. Unfortunately, much like mental health, sometimes people have a hard time of getting rid of that, letting it go and not allowing it to control you anymore. So you can't
Speaker: what happened happened at the end of the day. You can't change it. Unfortunately, not yet. We don't have, we don't have little time machines on our wrist where we can go back in time. Like, uh, like, uh, like the homeboy and Deadpool two cable, you know, the racist old guy or, or we don't have the, uh, we don't have the pin particle. Yeah, exactly. So yeah, we can't go back in time yet. Uh, however, you know, we can learn from it and,
Speaker: acknowledge existence and hopefully, you know, and be better from it, whether we're speaking for our mental state of mind or we're speaking for the world itself as, you know, obviously things happen. You can't pretend like they didn't because who wasn't there? Like super famous guy, I can't remember his name that said, uh,
Speaker: you know, if you pretend it didn't happen or so, I can't remember the exact quote, but history history will repeat itself. If we don't learn from it, if we don't learn from history, history is bound to repeat itself. I mean, yeah, I mean, I mean, I could wake up tomorrow and be like, the Holocaust never happened. And if somebody tells me differently, I'd be like, no, it didn't happen. I'm not,
Speaker: I don't, I don't acknowledge it. I don't remember it, but it doesn't make it any less true that it happened. You know, like as much as I want to believe that Rocky five never happened, it did happen. It's the end of the day. I'll go back down this road, Chris. Don't do this to me. I haven't let go. I have not let go.
Speaker: I refuse to let go with Connor. They always ruined an entire ass franchise of a one movie. It's over. Let it go. Let's try to save man. Uh, speaking of Rocky, RIP to Carl Weathers. I, apparently everybody thinks he just died earlier this week. They forgot that he died 30 some years ago.
Speaker: I'm just saying. Is it like one of the Rocky movie anniversaries? Or maybe like the anniversary of his death or something? No, I don't know. I know that Stallone man, he because they were obviously they were they've been good friends throughout the years. He put up a very emotional video on social media and behind him was that iconic picture from from the Rocky movie.
Speaker: Uh, three, I think it was. And behind him was that big, was that big painting? Uh, Rocky was still at Rocky. Stallone was tore up, man. Oh yeah. Well, as, as one should be in a situation like that. But, uh, yeah, unless like I said, you can't, you can't dwell on the past, but you also, you know,
Speaker: You have to be willing to acknowledge it and learn from it and move on from it. You're trying to erase it and pretend like it didn't happen. You're bound to make the same stupid mistakes, whether it's on a personal note or speaking in general about the state of the world.
Speaker: at the end of the day. Don't get too comfortable. I set the YouTube clip on the group chat. Oh, OK. Yeah. Oh, for that barbecue jerk? Yeah. And then there's the picture that I had. Oh, I have a look at the camera, too.
Speaker: And right now, the only thing we can do currently is like, do what we can wherever you are with what you have. That's all you can do, man. Yeah, but I wish I could do more. But also too, like kill people and love people, hate people. And also too, and I took a photo of this because I really wanted this picture because this one really, really stands out.
Speaker: the the the the
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. As the older, as the, as I become older, the more I understand these two and Al Bundy and, uh, and, uh, red Foreman. Yeah. And that is, uh, that is a fact. The older I get, the more I'm like, yeah, I understand.
Speaker: Yeah. I like how Bud goes to Allie's like, dad, have you ever like came across a bad girl? Yes, son. You call her mommy now. Or like red form and like no nonsense. Yeah. You do that and I'll be, he goes, my foot will go to your ass.
Speaker: Oh, maybe I'm sleepwalking. Yeah, I must be sleepwalking too, because I'm sleepwalking kicking your ass. And then Al Bundy sees he gets home from work. Oh, home sweet hell. You know, I used to, it's crazy because I really did. I used to, you know, that's these volumes.
Speaker: Yeah, I think once upon a time I reached a point where, you know, it's just why my mindset where my mind was, I dreaded going home. I think that's why it was so easy for me. Another reason why it was so easy for me to work so many hours, you know, in a day and a week or whatever, because I got to the point where I dreaded going home because I knew
Speaker: that there was going to be some fight for something stupid or, uh, I would have forgotten to done something simple, like turn a light off and I was going to be made to feel like a piece of shit or, you know, whatever the case or, you know, just the little things that, you know, like I was saying earlier in the show with dealing with depression, the little things that, that are, that, that set you off and are irritate you and frustrate you. Like I dreaded going home because.
Speaker: I knew that something was just going to put me in a bad mood. And I understand, like, that home sweet hell, you know? Yeah, I mean, it was a question that was on Reddit. This girl asked her what she said, why do men spend 15 to 30 minutes in the car when they get home? And then this commenter had over 10 ,000 likes. Wow.
Speaker: And I said, and the commenter said, because we're trying to embrace the bullshit we're about to step into. And you hear all the other guys preach. Amen. 100 % no cap. You really do. I mean that, or you take the long way home and you come in and you try to decompress from the day. And then you also try to prepare yourself and, and get mentally ready for
Speaker: But I'm already, you know, like I'm already going through shit as it is and nobody gives a fuck. And now I had to walk into, you know, kids running around acting crazy. Their, their, their mom bitching about God knows what, uh, you know, I just worked 14 hours and now I'm expected to come home and do 20 fucking things off the honey do list. Meanwhile, you've literally been home all fucking day in your cable world.
Speaker: taking the trash out, you're capable of, you know, fucking, you know, changing the toilet paper on the toilet paper roll instead of waiting on me to get home. And I forgot to do it the night before, you know, it's it's those little things, like I said. And for me personally, I was already so fucking mentally broken and just destroyed at that point in time where you use a twisted tie, Chris. You just spun it and took it. Yeah, exactly. Oh, you didn't put the twisty tie back on the bread. Shut up.
Speaker: Let's talk about some serious shit. Let's talk about let's talk about the fact that I'm literally on the edge of snapping and going out of murder spree because I'm so mentally goddamn broken, but you're pissed off about a twisty bread and me not put it on the goddamn loaf of bread. Shut up.
Speaker: I mean, I remember dating this one girl, like, just, she always wanted this constant attention. And then I'm like, every time she would pay, she'd be like, so you're getting off at 10, right? And I was like working from 2 to 10 PM. She was like, getting up at 10. I'm like, well, I hope so. I mean, I got all this other stuff. I'm like, why in my ass off? Cause it's like, I do not have the energy for her.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: And then like, I would tell one of my coworkers that's working from 11 to seven and I'm sitting there going, all right, when my phone goes off, I need you to say, Hey,
Speaker: the the
Speaker: the the
Speaker: Well, okay. I just hope it don't stay no late. I really want to see you. And I'm like, I know, I'm like, I know. Let me go figure this out. I'll, you know, hopefully it's not too late. And I was like, you're my boy. Cause I really, really, I'm like, I don't want to hear cause she's one of those girls. She's one of those girls or type of type of people where if there's no drama or gossip going on,
Speaker: they like create a fight. I had an excellent wife was kind of to a certain degree, but my previous fiance, she was like that. And we got to a point where it was like, nobody else is having drama. So we, so we, we have, it's like, yeah.
Speaker: What are we fighting about again? I'm so confused. Like what's going on? You left the toilet seat up. Yeah. Like you're eight hours away. We don't live together. Like if I'm not even when I'm at work, I'm constantly talking to you and I went out at home. What are we fighting about? What's going on? You're like, why are we doing this? Yeah. The whole like, oh, you must be cheating thing. My ex -wife used to do that fucking shit to me. I'm like. Four hours in a day.
Speaker: anywhere from 10 to 14 of those hours, I'm at work. The other 10 hours or whatever, I'm here, I eat, I play with the kids for a little bit, put them to bed, then I try to unwind and watch a little bit of TV and I go to bed in the garage. Where do I have time to cheat?
Speaker: It's not like I could take my work truck and go cheat on you because they've got that motherfucking thing GPS. And if I'm not at work, they're calling me going, where are you at with the fucking truck? Yeah. You know, why are you in this area with our vehicle? Yeah, like this isn't your designated work area. Cheating sounds like it would be so much fucking work. Yeah, like, yeah, it's not worth it at the end of the day, in my opinion.
Speaker: Yeah. Cause it's like, we're already doing like 10 to 12, 14 hours of work. And then we got to go home and do more work. And then we can still fix up the other word. Like, like, you know, it's just like, yeah, where the hell do I have? And then like, you know, when, when other instances like, okay, when you're not at home, I'm live streaming. So you can literally see what I'm doing at any given moment. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I got all these bitches at the house while I'm live streaming. Yeah.
Speaker: the the the the
Speaker: Oh, damn, he's cute, man. He could shackle me up or whatever. And then I see like another like an attractive woman on TV. I was like, oh, that's nice. Why don't you go fuck her then? I'm going. Why could you think I'd be sitting here with you? Should be less of a headache. And I will be honest, because of that girl,
Speaker: And then the sad part is like, I know that we went to high school together. I thought like, you know, but she was pretty like shit from the past. I'm like, really? You're, that was 10 years ago and you still remember that. I'm like, I barely remember that I played football there, but yeah, man. I mean, it was just, it was, she was just one of those girls and I'm just like, I don't know the energy. And then, and then, uh, she's like, Oh yeah, you work at the hospital with those girls at hot porno star bodies. And I just kind of went.
Speaker: That's why you're working all those over time out. Like Memorial Herman. Did you work at porn Memorial? Because, because, because, Oh, okay. The backstory of that was when I was doing the, the warehouse, um, keeping them, keeping them stocked up with supply, didn't everything just mainly the, you know, inventory specialists. I think it was, I think I was, that was my job title.
Speaker: But the fact that I had all the ICUs and then I had the ER to stock up with their supplies. So one of the nurses that I was cool with in the ER, they're like, Hey, you know, um, she's like, I'm having my bachelor read at Wild West. And she goes, and I, and I'm inviting you and I went, cool. I was like, Wild West is one of my hangouts and it's down the road where I live. Sure. No problem. So then, um, I tell, you know, the girl I was dating at the time, her name was Kelly.
Speaker: And I told her, I'm like, hey, my coworkers, I have an ambassador party at Wild West and they want to meet you, blah, blah, blah. Let's go. And she's like, okay, cool. I'll go. So then we get there and then, yeah, I mean, there's like attractive people no matter where you go. So everyone's like, Oh, Hey, I'm like, yeah, this is Kelly. They're like, Oh, you made, you made it.
Speaker: And then this one girl comes up and I went, this like really went from like minor headache to like, Jesus Christ, just shoot me now. So the girl, the one of the girls came up, her name was Roxanne and
Speaker: In my personal opinion, she was the most gorgeous Hispanic chick I've ever seen in my life, model -wise. And her and I are cool, we shoot the shit. But she's like, B, you made it. She gave me a big old hug. And I'm like, yeah. I'm like, I'm here. And I'm like, and this is... I was like, yeah. I was like, Roxanne, Kit, I turn. I'm like, the fuck did she go?
Speaker: So then I'm like, all right, so I should chat. And all of a sudden I'm like, OK, yeah, I'm going to go find her. She probably had to go to the bathroom.
Speaker: I spent, I walked around, then I went upstairs and then I go up on the upper deck of the club and she's sitting there in a booth crying her eyes out. She's like, no wonder what you work so much. Cause you work with hot girls and porter star bodies and I'm just going, no, I worked so much hours because I love my paychecks coming in and I have a lot of responsibilities than you do. Yeah. And then I,
Speaker: And it really befuddled me because even one time she was going, I'm stressed. I'm like, OK, what about? She goes, I'm just stressed. I'm going, OK, well, your parents pay your rent. And she goes, I'm just stressed. I'm like, OK, I mean, you're on your parents' car insurance. And I'm thinking, I'm like, what in the hell could she be so stressed out about?
Speaker: When the only thing that she really has to pay is her cell phone bill. I'm like, what the fuck are you so stressed out about? I'm sitting here like, I'm sitting here going like, Oh, let's see. I have a truck note, insurance, cell phone, apartment, apartment rent, because my brother is working barely part time. So it's like, I had to cover his half of the rent at times.
Speaker: because he didn't make enough, you know, because he was that lazy. I was like, I was like, on top of that, I was like, hmm, I gotta pay for the both of us in the apartment. I gotta do everything for, I was like, I was like, I had a lot of weight on my shoulders. I'm like, if anybody should be stressed, I should be the one saying I'm stressed out, but you're only paying for your cell phone, but your parents pay for everything else. Where's the, I'm trying to understand what is so dreadful.
Speaker: Yeah, man, if all I had to worry about was the cell phone bill, me and Nicky would be taking vacations. We'd be taking vacations with the kids. We'd be doing all kinds of things. No shit. Shit, I'll pay for all of our cell phones if that's all I got. That's the only bill I have. Mother. Yeah, baby, that's how shit goes, because I'm just stressed. I'm like. Dressed about his money.
Speaker: the the
Speaker: There's even one time she got mad at me for no stupid reason. She goes, oh yeah, what if like one guy just decided to holler at me and wanted to take me home for the night? And I just went, good, he's more your, then you're his problem. Cause it got the, I mean, out of all the women I dated, she was the only one I was ever, ever an asshole to because it just like, she didn't press that button. She, no, no, no. She fucking Gallagher that button.
Speaker: So, so yeah, so be, you know, that one would be like, Oh my God. I mean, every time's like, if it like should be like wanting to hang out and I've come up with an excuse, like, Oh no, I got to take my brother here or I got to take my dad to the VA or whatever the situation may be. And, you know, a little bit just easier. And I know that sounds a lot easier said than done because I've been in this situation. It's easier just to break up with her.
Speaker: Yeah. And then one, and then one day, like, just because I told her no and she threw a fit. And apparently the Teddy bear that I got her for Valentine's day, I, cause my buddy Kenny, he had a lot of money. He just like, Hey, let's just go somewhere. So I said, Hey, I'll be out with Kenny. You know, I'm not, I'm gonna have to cancel our plans. Kenny, Kenny, something's going on with Kenny. I'm going to go check it out. So we're in his vehicle.
Speaker: And then I come back, he jost me off at my apartment and the teddy bear that I got her for Valentine's Day, I found mutilated all over my truck. So after that, I called her up, I said, we're done. I don't want to hear it, but apparently you're just the spoiled, petulant little child. And I was like, I ain't got the time, I ain't got the time for you anymore. So then she wants to, and then so she said, I hung up on her.
Speaker: So as per typical, you know, she's all in her emotions, all in her field. So she goes all over Facebook and try to bash me on Facebook. But everybody who are mutual friends with, we all went to high school together or somebody that knows me very well. And the only thing she's in there, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And everybody's like, yeah, but you push them. Brian would not do that unless you push them. And they know how she is. So.
Speaker: And then on top of that, like she sends me this text, this long ass text about everything that I've done. So then I counter back. I said, well, props to the person that wrote it for you. And then she's going, what do you mean? I said, well, first of all, you can't spell with the shit.
Speaker: Two, you use bad grammar. This is all done professionally. This is all done in order. And I was like, the only other person that I know that could do that is your friend, Bobby. I was like, tell her, good job on, on responding for you. I'm like, do you think I'm that stupid?
Speaker: Yeah, right. I'm like grammar. You can't spell with the shit. And you think, oh, this is all me 100 percent me. No. No. Yeah, exactly. No, that's. That's that's that's I went through that with.
Speaker: with my ex -fiancee, you know, she was all over social media and just, just dragging me into fucking mud. And that was like, our mutual friends were like, really? And then they were calling her out on shit. And I was blocked. I didn't give a fuck. You know, I, I'm the type of person, once I'm done with somebody, I'm out. And it was just like, I didn't say shit until one day we were on the show and we were talking about something that had nothing to fucking do with her.
Speaker: And she texted me running her fucking mouth. And I was like, all right, since you're watching, enjoy this. And I told Jeff and Tony, I said, just sit back. I need to get some shit off my chest. And I went in for 35 minutes and just called her out on all her bullshit and everything like that.
Speaker: And I know she's seen every fucking second of it because then the next day she was running her mouth on, on, on social media. And a couple of our friends were, I said, I don't give a fuck. I'm done. You know, she, first and foremost, you know, I don't have any time or patience for cheaters. Once you cheat on me, you know, I, I dealt with it with my ex -wife. She, she cheated on me multiple times and I kept forgiving her. And when it was finally done, I said, I'm never dealing with another woman who cheats on me.
Speaker: I'm not going to do it. And she did. And, and, you know, once, you know, it took a little bit because I put a lot of time and energy and effort in for, for that relationship. It took, it took a little bit. It took like a week. And then I was like, all right, I'm checking out. I'm done. And you're still fucking lurking my show. And then you get mad about something that doesn't even fucking pertain to you. And you want to fucking text me in the middle of my show? Yeah. Okay. Now I'm, now I'm going off.
Speaker: And I did. No, that's what I said. That's why I'm grateful now. One of the many reasons I love Nikki is that there's no drama with her. Even when we do get into a fight, once it's done, it's done. She doesn't come back a couple of days later and go, well, you motherfucker shit. Once it's done, it's done.
Speaker: You forget to put the coolest thing down. There's no outside drama from, you know, I, I, even though I torment the hell out of one of her friends because it's fun, you know, there's no drama from her friends. There's no bullshit drama from like exploit friends or anything like that. Like nothing that I've dealt with that, like one little minor thing, but that was more just her and I having fun.
Speaker: And fucking with the guy more than anything because he's such a douche, you know, so it wasn't real drama But uh, you know, there's nothing that i've come into contact with I don't have any drama from any of my exes past relationships, but mic Past relationships, you know, you know i'm very i'm very grateful and like I said, you know, we
Speaker: We communicate pretty well. I've never had that in a partner where we can communicate and talk about things. And, you know, if I do something stupid, she's going to call me out on it and she's not going to, you know, she's going to call me out on it. I will feel horrible for a day or two or whatever. However, you know, but she's not going to dwell on it. She's not going to continue to beat me up over it. Yeah. You know, if I don't put the fucking toilet paper
Speaker: on the right way. She's going to say, Hey, dummy, I like the whole paper this way. And I'm going to say, I don't see why it fucking matters because it's all going to wipe your ass the same. Well, apparently, apparently like when you have the toilet roll over, it's easier to control and easier to tear versus under as when you pull under, it just keeps going. But if you put it under, it's easier to find in the dark.
Speaker: Well, I don't have a preference. I didn't know that you have a. I know I just however it's in my head. That was just an example. That's never a fight. We've never had that fight over the toilet paper. Well, it was just an example. It's always the beer with the lid. You forget to put the lid down. I do get yelled at about the toilet would be put down and I tell her if I'm capable of lifting the toilet seat, you're capable of putting it down. But it's also dark and I don't turn the light on in the middle of the night. So confession time.
Speaker: Yes, you took a swim in the toilet a couple of weeks ago. I did not order a bidet. OK, I understand why she gets mad. So it was yeah, so it was it was a show night. I woke up all night and I woke up and I had to shit.
Speaker: So I get in there and it's dark and I want to turn the light on because she's sleeping and I'm like, and I dropped my pants and I just sit and I sit and I'm like, oh, that's cool. I got in my ass. Ball set. I'm the fuck down the damn toilet. I'm like, oh, OK. I understand now. I've never lived this life before. Now I'm about it. I'll try to.
Speaker: Oh, yeah. I totally forgot to tell you about that. I just remember that. Oh, it was not an enjoyable experience. No, it's really fucking. I'm surprised you didn't break the porcelain toilet bowl there. Oh, and I'm surprised I didn't break a lot of things in the bathroom. I'm surprised you didn't wake up. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait. With the moment you hit and you felt the cold water, did you go?
Speaker: It might've sounded like that. No, no, trust me. It was under my breath, still trying to be quiet. I was like, shit, fuck, fuck. I grabbed the shower, the shower rod. I'm surprised I didn't pull that off the wall. I was surprised I didn't pull the shower. I was reaching for anything trying to get out of there as fast as I could. It was terrible. It was a terrible experience. No, I don't talk about that app or the creators. They bore me.
Speaker: I'm like, all right. Now in my head, mental thought, I'm going to try to be better about putting the toilet seat down. However, I still have that mindset. If I can lift it up, you can put it down. Or when you're done, you lift it up for me. There you go. It's a, it's a trade -off. Yeah. But no, you know, now in the middle of the night, then it's a fair game.
Speaker: Yeah, whatever happens happen. Like, like Ivan Drago said, if you go for a swim, go for a swim. If she dies, she dies. Or just like, or just like you turn like the moment you, you, you feel like the light coming on and then you're like, what? And then you see the big old hand. I fucking told you to fucking put the seat down.
Speaker: That is the first time in my 42 years of existence that I've ever taken a swim in the toilet. And I do not recommend it. I'm not on the Titanic. Move, bitches, room on the door. Let me off. Oh, man. Oh, that water is cold.
Speaker: Yeah, Lee. One out of five stars, I do not recommend. The only thing I can say is traumatizing for me, and one of the relationships I've had was like almost five years.
Speaker: we were cuddling and everything. And next thing I was just like, oh, she goes, she goes, you're so warm. And I'm like, yeah. And then next thing she goes, then two minutes later, just, I'm like, at first I'm like, that hate me. That hate me. And then all of a sudden, like, I kind of like lifted up the cover, like,
Speaker: All right, I'm going to go sleep on the couch. Good night. That's, that's, that's a normal. And she said, and she said, she goes, she goes, no, come back. I didn't meet, she goes, I'm sorry. And I'm like, bullshit. If I, if the, if I would have done it, she's like, no, you're sleeping in the guest room. You farting on me. You fart on my head. Don't fart on your head. And I'll tell you what, some of the shit that comes out of your ass while you're sleeping is horrible.
Speaker: I don't know how you don't wake up with shit in your drawer. You ain't no saint, eh? You got booty hole demons too, man. Okay, you keep telling yourself that. I'm gonna start recording you. Oh, well the sounds, yeah, but the smell. Your ass reeks. Yeah.
Speaker: I got, I got, I got some bass. Remember those bass CDs from back in the day? That's my ass. I do remember eating corn. You know, came out his ass like bird shot. You know, a little bit of corn bread.
Speaker: The little bit of control I have in my sleep, I do try not to give her a fart transfer if we're laying back to back. You know, I don't. No, you do not. I don't, I try not to fight your fart in her general direction. I said the little bit of controls that I had. However, in the morning, she, every morning, Jesus Christ, because it's like from the bed to the bathroom, all the way, I'm just.
Speaker: Right. Right. Oh, I fired up my my fucking F -350. You crack that 18 Wheeler. I don't know. She goes, she's like, God damn every morning. God damn. Damn. You sit up, you kiss me and then you spit yourself. It's a hell of a routine. I get up, I kiss you and then I shit myself.
Speaker: Jesus Christ, did you have omelet and chili again? No, it's a five bean burrito before bed. Oh, stop judging me. Delicious. One of my favorite things on the planet. I think one of the tastiest delicacies the spaghetti monster in the sky ever created was frozen burrito.
Speaker: the the the the
Speaker: But I will say, I will say that I will say this though, but farting never gets old. No, we both do it. I mean, it's like, you know, we give each other shit. I'm not, I'm not going to, I'm not going to make her feel bad because she farts. I'm not going to, you know, she gives me shit for farting, but it's like, it happens. The other, what?
Speaker: I don't fart on your head. I don't think you know how the human anatomy works. You've seen me naked. You know that my asshole is nowhere near your head when you're when your head is in my life. And then you have pillows and blankets and everything there. You're protected. My head vibrates. You fart on my head. The whole couch vibrate. Stop putting your head on his ass. The whole couch is vibrating.
Speaker: Stop farting on my head. Stop putting your head in my fart. Stop putting your head on my ass. Yeah, there was like another time like we were cuddling and then next time like she knew she had to fart and next time like she I felt her grip on my arm and then they said like she lets go she lets it rip and I'm like uh -uh and she goes no no no stay with me I'm like mm -hmm and then like I would smell them I'm like
Speaker: Oh, my God, your mom's got to lay off that sauce. Right. As she leaves the room, as she leaves the room, just look at her shoes and she'll be like, that's a wall right there. It's not like I fart in her face or anything like that. Oh, oh, I beg to take her. You treat her like Meg. I beg to take her. There was one time. Jackass number two. It was one time and it was an accident.
Speaker: I come home from work. She was sitting on the couch. I gave her kisses when I got home like I always do. And I walked over to take my wallet and my phone and all my work shit out and put it on the counter where I put it at.
Speaker: was trying because I knew I knew I had no heart. I was trying to hold it in. And I think I like leaned over to hit the dog or something. I don't know. Yeah, I tripped over the dog or something. I don't know. But it came out and it was just like right. My ass was right in her face. And it was like, she was like, really? I didn't do it on purpose. Like, damn, bro. So I grabbed you by the back of the head and shoved your head in my ass.
Speaker: I'm gonna go find you some PJs, okay? Definitely thought I was muted. But yeah, I mean, relationship follies. I mean, what are you gonna do? You know, at the end of the day, it's one of those things, you know,
Speaker: It could very easily be a fight, absolutely, but it's not because it's... You threatened to shit in my lap the other day. What were you doing? We're not fighting. Do it. Do it. You don't have your stones. I wanted you to do the real thing. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah. So we have two bathrooms and both of us had to shit at the same time.
Speaker: And I was like, I'm going to go to our bathroom. She's like, no, you're not. I am. You can go use the kids' bathroom. I was like, I don't want to. She's like, well, I'm going to beat you back there. I said, I'll just sit on your lap and then we can post shit simultaneously. Oh, that's romantic. Right. That's what I thought. It's like a new level of our relationship. Spread your legs. Happy Valentine's Day, babe. Will you be my Valentine? Do you want to play battleship?
Speaker: And then, and then, and then once you go and you're like, my compliments to the chef. Yeah. And I can give her a kiss. See, you are, see, you are romantic. She's like, I hate you, Brian. I hate Brian. She's over there in the back going, I hate you so much talking to me.
Speaker: i can't stage you i can't stage your stupid fucking friends your stupid fucking face she's gonna she's gonna text me tomorrow while i'm at work and she's like so i've been doing a lot of thinking and i really think he's shaking friends i'm like well what's wrong with jeff not jeff brian he has to go he is not going to meet us in new orleans brian's not allowed to come to new orleans anymore
Speaker: I'll be eating a lot of cages spicy jambalaya for you, woman. I think I hear Brian come down the street. Coming in like one of those little, uh, there's a harbor shorts with a little ricochet.
Speaker: who knows I might be farting dixie I don't know did his ass just say Marco
Speaker: There is something seriously wrong with you. It's not just me. That's like I'm the only one having this conversation right now. I said there's something seriously wrong with you. Oh, shit.
Speaker: It's not just me and the voices in my head talking right now. They're real people. They're here. You're one hell of a ventriloquist. You know that. Wait, wait, wait. Wait, wait, wait. All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. I'm going to send you this link. If Blake and I ever did meet, this will probably more likely will happen. Hold on a second. Oh, yes. This.
Speaker: This will definitely be us if we ever met. Oh man, New Orleans is going to be fun. How many meters there too?
Speaker: of a challenge. At the time I out fronted Michael Moore. Hi there. How you doing?
Speaker: You said the New Orleans alone.
Speaker: I get my baby dressed.
Speaker: And I'm laughing so hard I've been trying to get her foot in the same hole for the last three minutes. Shit. This is the intense increases of speed and complication of that song. Well.
Speaker: You know, on that note, it's probably a good time for that scope. All right. You know, that's, uh, it sounds like this is a good, this is a good stopping point before we get going too much. And it is Monday night. Oh, I got kids. Hopefully, uh, tonight I gotta pretend to go care about.
Speaker: to do what? To go pretend to care about. Yeah, I gotta do some, I gotta do some bed farting. That's a love language. I gave her goodnight kisses followed by goodnight farts. I love you. I love you.
Speaker: Every night at Dutch oven or I give her a kiss and then hit her with a Dutch oven. Let's play a game. You always make sure she falls asleep first. Yeah. Did I fall asleep first? I fall asleep before she does. Every night we play a game of called what did I have for lunch? She may have. Definitely onions. Definitely onions.
Speaker: Yeah, she may have Stockholm syndrome at this point at the end of the day. But I do want to wrap this up before it gets too much later. I do got to get ready and get myself in bed. I think my kids have all passed out. I think I got another sick one this week. And then cash came home today and
Speaker: He's not feeling the greatest. He fell asleep on the couch. Well, Buggy was out, what, like three days last week? Yeah. Yeah, shoot. Buggy was out of school three days last week. What is this? We can end it on that clip. Okay. Well, we'll go ahead and get this, uh... I'm gonna pay. Mag! I'm having a goddamn finger.
Speaker: There we go. Well, that was interesting. Nothing wants to work. That's my excuse, usually. Well, it usually comes up first try. I don't know what's going on. It happens to every guy. All right, here we go. When you get to my age. I was in the old TV. Hi, Meg.
Speaker: I wanna catch the mumps, Lois. Here's your TV, Meg. It's a little old and there's no remote and it only gets one channel and it's not on that channel right now. Chris, check it out. Jackass number two. This whole day has been one big laugh riot.
Speaker: I love that goddamn show. Sometimes I forget how great that show is because I haven't watched it forever. It's been forever since I watched an episode of Family Guy. Now I kind of want to watch it.
Speaker: that's not one of them are you the the the the the the the the the
Speaker: No, I mean, but like, like king of the hill. Cause like, cause like this morning, cause my coworkers, Zach and I, cause like the whole time while we're going to Georgetown, we're, we're talking family guy and American and king of the hill. And so like this morning we walk in, we clock in like, Oh, you boys are back. We're like, yeah, man, you know, come out there, go around there and just saying all this other stuff. We're like, whoa, whoa. And then, and then Zach, he just goes,
Speaker: Yeah, man. I mean, like we have like these pallets and pallets and pallets. I mean, like it just they're going and then they're like, everybody's looking at us like you guys had way too much time on your hands while you're over there. My my grandfather, my grandfather, he would he talked to he always reminded me of boom. When that show came out, boom, our my grandpa talked. You couldn't understand shit that man said outside of like one or two words in a sentence.
Speaker: Yeah, man. Coming out here to talk about this show coming on that like porky butthole or something, man. I mean, I'll tell you what, dude. I mean, like, you just got to let bygones be bog off, man. It's my purse. I don't know you. I don't know you. It's my purse.
Speaker: Yeah, I mean, but but yeah, I mean, like, yeah, that's all we were talking about. We're talking about King of the Hill, family guy, Simpsons, South Park. I never was a big South Park fan. I liked... What? I love Futurama. Futurama was... Futurama was cool. Yeah, Futurama, yeah. Yeah, my other co -worker, Felipe, who went with me to Vegas. Listen, buddy, head now.
Speaker: the the the
Speaker: We need full body cavity searches. We need to put some family guy or something on so you just like I need a break from murder TV. The last one I watched last night was fucking brutal. Like, it was terrible. It didn't involve kids.
Speaker: No. Oh, okay. That's, you know, what's one thing about that show that I do like in the one episode with the kids. You should start, you should start with the episode. You should start with the family guy episode, something, something, something dark side. Yeah. Oh yeah. The star Wars. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: I'm just going to start at the beginning. I love the cut scenes that they do. I love the chicken fight that Peter, like I imagine that one day when I fight a kangaroo, that's going to be the scenario of me and a kangaroo, like Peter, the chicken. The kangaroo is my chicken. Like, what were we fighting for anyway? I don't know. I just wanted I didn't want to go home. But no, I knew I do want to wrap this show up.
Speaker: As always, we can have the serious conversations, but at the end of the day, it's not always about the serious conversation. Sometimes it's just hanging out with your buddies and having a good laugh and having conversations, whether it's real life or just whatever. Sometimes that's good for you as well. Sometimes that's exactly what the doctor ordered at the end of the day, is just having your friends around and having some fun conversation.
Speaker: fart jokes fart jokes and we're gonna do a list top five reasons to break up with your girlfriend number one she farted in bed that's Brian's number one pick she farted on me in bed
Speaker: the the
Speaker: And the next day I go in the bathroom and I come out there, he's calling, and then he's calling like my best friend goes, he goes, all right, look, just let you know. We need some bill money. Brian is taking a shit at the, in the cat and Windsor castle and everything. And then he's got a, he's got a speaker and the Kenny's like, well, he said he always wanted to have a Royal throne. So I come out of there. I'm all like,
Speaker: Yes, I've taken a shit in a fucking royal castle, bitches. I want to shit in a royal castle. I finally found my throne. I could just step inside the royal castle and take a shit in a fucking America, bitches.
Speaker: Yes, that smell, that's from the UK breakfast. Y 'all add beans to your breakfast, British people. They don't do anything right when it comes to food. Let's be honest. I do like a, like a British, the British breakfast is like beans, ham, toast, and two other things I can't remember, but mainly beans was in it. So it's like, okay, beans for breakfast. Sure.
Speaker: the same as the same as the same as the same as the same as the same as the same as
Speaker: No, like I said, we want to wrap this up. Appreciate you guys hanging out. Appreciate you guys coming on the show. Everybody watching. Hopefully you guys enjoyed the show. Hopefully you guys are liking these new Monday night shows. We still have fun. We still like to have fun. We still like to, you know, joke around, but we also like, you know, we also focus on the series and whatnot as well. If you're not already, feel free to check out the social medias.
Speaker: Facebook Instagram X and tick tock we do do the show Monday Wednesdays and Saturday 7 p .m. Is on YouTube and twitch and Facebook and you can also listen to us any time any place Where we listen to podcasts at all at nonsensical nonsense podcast or you can simply go to bio link slash nonsensical nonsense all the links for all the social media is there as well as the links to our sponsors
Speaker: And if you do happen to find us on any of those social medias, that bio link is also pinned to the top or in the bio. So it's quick and easy to find. Be so kind, give us a follow. And we do greatly appreciate them shares as well. We will be back Wednesday night with a brand new episode. Hopefully at some point Jeff will get me the list. We did a starting five Saturday night and Jeff will get me that list so I can get it posted on social media. But with that being said,
Speaker: I want to wrap the show up tonight with a little Matt James, Chainsmoking Whiskey, lead singer of Black Top Mojo. You can find Black Top Mojo on all social media and everywhere you stream music at Black Top Mojo. Same with Matt James. You can find him everywhere at Matt James. Go give him a follow. Go give the guys some love. This is off of his newest solo album, Chainsmoking Whiskey.
Speaker: I thought it'd be the cowboy killers They put a hole in my chest I didn't want to send, gave out the rich But damn, you still left Turns out you can hit a rock bottom
Speaker: Oh, come if you got on slow I got on loud I'll back them back Change smoking with scares Shot after shot Years through your memory That's all that I got And now it's like hell I still smoke cigarettes
Speaker: It's really negative for a stiff drink. One vise for another. Didn't do a damn thing, it just changed.
Speaker: All that I got And now it's not hell I steal small cigarettes Now change smoking with scares as close as I close as I can To lighten my gun Cause quitting's too hard So I just stay drunk Alone in this bar
Speaker: Jane's smoke and whiskers shine
Speaker: It's as close as I can Face love, you risk it, it's time after time Here's a studio memory, that's all that I got And I wish like hell I still smoke cigarettes
Speaker: Yeah, buddy, that's how you know uh the guys from Blacktop Mojo are from Texas.
Speaker: Uh, so I'm not sure which part of Texas, but they're from Texas. They're, uh, I know I've played it on here before, but if you've never seen it, check out blacktop Mojo's acoustic cover of, uh, Phil Collins in the air tonight. They're at a local distillery. Shiner. I don't know if it was Shiner or what it is. It's not shiny. Yeah. So I saw the Shiner box. I'm like, Oh yeah, Shiner box. I can't remember the name of it. That video came out like fucking 12 years ago.
Speaker: Um, but, uh, they're not, they're in an old distillery and they're like in this fucking big barn. And he got these big giant ceilings and it's just Matt and Kat. Kat's the, Kat, uh, plays bass, but he also plays guitar, uh, acoustic cover of, uh, in the air tonight. The acoustics in this fucking place are awesome. I can't remember the name of the distillery, but it's somewhere there in Texas. Anywho, uh, wrap this bad boy up, get out of here for the night. Um, you know,
Speaker: If you guys can learn anything, just remember, it's not always gonna be bad. There's better days ahead, you just gotta keep pushing forward. Take a deep breath and relax. Yep, it's not always bad. As I think Brian and I said it a couple weeks ago, like Eric Draven said in the first grow moving. Can't read all the time. All the time. So like I said, keep pushing forward guys and
Speaker: don't forget means for breakfast that you may not know that that have been through it and that that give a damn so by any got anything you'd like to any parting words you'd like to leave the people's with them and just to be appreciative of what you have and just work with what you have
Speaker: I know that's right. I know that's right. What about you? And also have ranch or baked beans for breakfast. I sent you the link in the chat. Brian's trying really hard to make sure I'm never allowed to sleep in his bedroom again. Back to the couch.
Speaker: Oh, what about you? You got any, you got any parting words of wisdom for these, for these fine people that listen to this, this show. Uh, we'll go cliche, live hard and love harder. I like it. I'll like it. I'm not going to complain with that being said, I'm going to hit this little red button up here at the top of the screen. It's going to
