Transcript
Speaker: Hey guys, welcome to Grove Hills. podcast. We're excited to have you joining us here today. Great conversation coming ahead. Something I think is really, really important. Every believer at some point. comes face to face with this. this question.
Speaker: instructions on how to pray, how to carry out a dialogue with God. and we i You know, I don't think very many... Christians question the importance of it. They know it's really important. I think they all want to do it. yeah They know the value of it, but inevitably you'll get asked the question, how do I pray to God? So let let's start a little bit with some questions here. like um what What are the things that...
Speaker: that drive us away from prayer. What keeps us from just feeling comfortable with our prayer? I think the... the I'll just say at the old school church prayers, you know, I think you have some of these people that.
Speaker: I've been in circles where it's like, man, this is some elaborate speech. Like, do I have to know these? Do I have to have Merriam -Webster's dictionary? Like, okay, how do I ah describe the attributes of God in this? you know yeah beautiful speech and that's great you know that's that's Cool, and some people really do have a rhythm of that where they, that's just... They're around people that talk that way. But I think sometimes it can do a detriment to the church. Whenever you have somebody that walks in and they're new to faith and they're like...
Speaker: What is this guy talking about? So I think those are detriments that we sometimes unintended. ah kind of see in the church. You have these big speeches, but it's just... dialogue, as you said, it's... back and forth conversation of just real life.
Speaker: God, this is where I'm at. yeah so I'll add to that. Something I've always said is someone's praying in King James. yeah because yeah They use the vows and the therefores and in your prayer. You don't typically use those in your everyday life. yeah yeah But you're right. it It kind of puts it...
Speaker: at a different level and so someone coming to a men's group hearing someone pray like that not that that's wrong right But hearing someone pray like that, they go, man, maybe I need to brush up on my speech before I pray. yeah yeah And that's not the case at all.
Speaker: Right. Back when I was in college, i had the the story always comes to my mind because when I was in college, a friend of mine said, hey, I need you to come preach at my church one Sunday. He was the pastor of a little church outside of the town where we were. and
Speaker: He said, ah it's a great group of people. You're going to love it. Here's what I'd love for you to preach about, all this kind of stuff. And he said, but I do need to warn you. I said, why is that? He said, because there's a deacon who prays at the end of every service. And he said, I kid you not, he's from the 15th century. ah Every word he prays. And so that Sunday I got through preaching and about the time the guy stood up to preach is when I remember what my friend who warned me about and he started in and I could not help but snicker all the way through that prayer. Not because he's wrong. You're right. and There's nothing wrong with it, but it's just this element that we take on like we're trying to formalize ourselves before God and those kinds of things. It is wrong if you're trying to do it for the performance sake, oh yeah right right? But typically most people pray like that because they heard grandma praying. that yeah her grandpa praying like that yeah and so as long as it's not that stand on the preach
Speaker: corner and do it for performance yeah so let me give you a little word of encouragement here in the sense that The disciples were in the same boat that you and I were. Yeah. uh if you remember the story they went to jesus in luke chapter 11 and they didn't ask God teaches how to do miracles. They didn't say, show us what real religion looks like. They said, can you teach us how to pray? Yeah.
Speaker: And that's where we get what's commonly known as the Lord's Prayer. Um... mostly misused by football teams before every game. you know yeah I don't know. that's That's probably not a right thing to say either. but yeah the The question was, how do we pray? and That's what Jesus taught them. I think beyond the words of the Lord's Prayer, I think what Jesus was trying to say to the guys is it's really about a relationship. Right.
Speaker: That's what it's really about. So speak to that a little bit, Kyle. As far as the de Lord's Prayer goes, I think there's a huge portion of people that use it as a routine, like you said, before the football game. Maybe quoting it for bed. and And repetition is fine.
Speaker: and memorizing it's fine.
Speaker: But are we truly listening to the words of it? And are we truly understanding what it's what it's saying? And so and that's where you go back to that conversational level of, I could pray the Lord's Prayer. and internalize it for me asking him these things you know give it give me my daily bread um lead me not into temptation different things like that where it's legitimate prayer right jesus was giving them an example and so if jesus is praying that prayer uh it's a good one to stick with um but the idea of just saying it off the top of your head before you go to bed um Just because?
Speaker: maybe a bit of concern because we're we might be... just teaching repetition instead of what the the heart really... he's wanting to talk to the lord about so yeah yeah so john talk a little bit about this one of the things i think all of us encourage guys to do when they come to us men and women and ask that question is Keep it simple. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. Keep it simple. That's that's the thing. don't Don't start out thinking you have to pray for... 60 minutes. Sometimes it's a 60 second prayer. Or maybe it's just, I used to think, I used to have this weird thought, don't judge me viewers. I thought, man.
Speaker: why aren't they bowing their head and they pray? You know, I was, you know, as a kid, I was always told, Hey, bow your head. Right. You know, if you're driving down the car, I don't want you to bow your head like, or driving a car down the road. Please don't do that. Just be simple. Talk to God. yeah you know Turn the radio off if you're going to work. yeah Say, God, I acknowledge who you are.
Speaker: And then walk into after that acknowledgement saying, God.
Speaker: I desire to relationship with you in this season of my life. This is where I'm at. And then throw the ask in there. ah God, I really need your help today with whatever it is. yeah And again, ending it with acknowledgement of who he is, because that's where it starts and ends is acknowledgement of who he is. So that's the simplest way that I kind of fashioned my prayers after. he is Speaking of the not closing your eyes and bowing your head, I used to work in a jail and I'd pray over the inmates and I'm definitely not going to close my eyes. bow my head in that situation. No. um But like back to what you were saying, John, it's just the simplicity of it. yeah um If you were to ask someone to pray for the first time in front of people... And they're going to be. incredibly nervous because they feel like they have to find some type of pathway or words to get there um when if we're having dinner you could just say
Speaker: god there's dinner in front of us It looks really good. Thank you for bringing it here, right? Like, just so simple, like you're you're having a conversation with them. And that's what I tell people, like you were saying, when when they're first learning how to pray.
Speaker: Just open your mouth and describe what you're going through. yeah um it's ah It's a conversation. Yeah. I mean, it very much is like, for those of who you who are married, having a conversation with your spouse, or for all of us, we can kind of relate, having a conversation with your best friend. You know?
Speaker: um when When I walk up to my best friends, I don't go up to them with a... formal approach i don't try to use magical words that i feel like are going to appeal better than others i just kind of i just kind of say the need and ah you know one of the things i think a lot of us get tricked into believing is that there's a certain length that has to you know if I only just say a few sentences that's not enough
Speaker: I've got to throw in some real theological sounding things, some theological ideas. um And I think we misconstrue what Luke was... sharing with us that jesus teaching in luke 11 uh in the lord's prayer where he you know he says Whenever you pray, pray like this. I don't think he was saying you've got to pray these exact words. of course.
Speaker: I think he was just saying there's some elements that you should have in your prayer. uh like thanksgiving yep and confession and adoration and you know make an appeal for protection against future bad choices those kinds of things and those ideas those concepts are what make prayer Personal for each one of us. Yeah. Um...
Speaker: I don't have to pray like John does. John doesn't have to pray like Kyle does. None of us are locked into those kinds of things. So I i would encourage you to go back, read the passages where the Lord's Prayer is given, and just kind of model your prayer a little bit after some of those ideas. Not those words, but those ideas. Um,
Speaker: How about praying scripture? I know it's something you encourage a lot of people to do. Yeah, for sure. um the the truth is in scripture and so oftentimes we get so much things in our head that's not truth And so we have to navigate what we're even saying to the Lord. Although he loves to hear.
Speaker: ah just where we're at. god i'm confused i don't know what i'm doing he loves to hear those things as well but to take scripture and pray that back to them you're basically just proclaiming truth right and and it's a It kind of realigns. So if you have a situation where you're struggling with your marriage or you're struggling with your parenting of some sort,
Speaker: When you pray scripture, you're almost declaring to the Lord that these are the truths that you want to follow. And it kind of aligns your life. in order how to how to make the decisions in your marriage or in your parenting. Yeah. yeah um Another thing that I think really, really is important is to not measure the success of your prayers by what you feel.
Speaker: yeah we had to make I don't feel like my prayers are getting very far. They're not getting past the ceiling. Some people use that expression. Those kind of things. so Speak to that a little bit there, John. I think sometimes, too, we put... that on the feeling. The good thing is in this relationship that we do this dialogue,
Speaker: uh we when we say it doesn't hit the ceiling it's because they're thinking of it in a monologue like it's a a singular deal well guess what In this relationship, God's going to be the one that makes everything happen. He just wants you to be open. So I think in that. you know, feeling we can't base our prayers off of what we feel like should be answered.
Speaker: ah We can't base our prayers. based on what we think should be the plan. It should be on, okay, God, to your point, I'm going to speak scripture. I'm going to speak what you spoke.
Speaker: with David or with who you put it. a name on it whoever in scripture was communing with God, having a relationship with God. What is it that God had designed for them to walk into? And that is to rely fully on Him, yeah not on their feelings. You know, you're always asking us questions. I'm going to ask you a question. All right, here we go.
Speaker: ah Scripture said God... hears the prayers of a righteous man. So is there are instances where maybe someone who's living in sin and just in direct disobedience to the Lord?
Speaker: Is there instances where God's not hearing those prayers? Was that specifically for me? Oh, it's just it's just a general question. I think so. I think. so um i think Again, it comes back to God knowing the heart of a person. right I believe God will hear sinful man's prayers when he knows the man's getting right right and is genuinely seeking God.
Speaker: um i also believe that when when you and i live out our lives when we enter into patterns or seasons of sin then our prayers are impeded from being able to make a difference. right that God doesn't honor.
Speaker: Um, that relationship in that season because it's not being tended to. like I agree with that because it made me think of like a father and a son. And if the son is just... running the other direction and living in sin and spending his money. not wisely and just kind of...
Speaker: making all the poor decisions and as he's doing that turns around like hey can I get some more money the dad's like No, right. It's like a it's like we're not in a uh fellowship right now you know right and so a kind of similar situation is if you're just acting in direct disobedience to the lord but then asking him to heal your marriage uh you're contradicting yourself yeah and god's sitting here like going i can't Me and my jest.
Speaker: I can't honor this. and and honor your quest at what you're doing. So I would agree with you. Okay, so let me throw another question back at y 'all. Uh -oh. this one's This one's a little bit interesting because I just came across it. bit There are some very... popular and influential social media influencers i have seen of late who have made the argument that prayer is not a dialogue with God.
Speaker: that it is a monologue because God has already said everything he's going to say. Hmm. How do you feel about that? Disagree I disagree with that because...
Speaker: Um, Yes, God has revealed all he was going to say in Scripture. I think he's establishing... all that he wants humanity to know in the sense of general concepts and precepts. like We're getting all those established in Scripture.
Speaker: But the beautiful thing is the same relationship he had with Paul. that he had with... Adam, that you go on and on. There is no other Kyle. There is no other Ridley. And as God relations with you, as the walks with you, if you're a believer in Christ.
Speaker: then there are going to be things in your prayer life that I believe that he is walking with you in. And based on the prayers, that that we offer in relationship with Him. I believe that Hugh will... answer some of those things that not necessarily that we're changing god but sometimes we're aligning ourselves with god's will for our life and i think We have to see ourselves. yes, as lowly in comparison to God, but God listens to us. Yeah. And there are, I think, those kind of nuances that...
Speaker: uh kind of jump out of scripture because i believe god reveals himself even outside of scripture and we see it through nature, but. God is allowing to still work. his uh his way and kind of his,
Speaker: um proceedings even where we're at today in our prayer life. Yeah, I would agree. I would say false on the monologue. As you look through Scripture, and in most cases, there is a dialogue between God and God and Moses, God and Job.
Speaker: And you see this back and forth. and in Scripture, it's more documented. It's more real because there was an actual inner exchange with them. Yeah, our interchange Interchange. Interchange, yeah. um And so, My encouragement to you would be your prayer needs to be accompanied with Scripture. yeah And so if you're praying that the Lord guides you in your marriage... Where's the... best place to hear from the lord in your prayers is scripture right And so to be able to just.
Speaker: pray and pray only you're doing yourself a disservice um but to pray and study and abide in scripture and you're going to get that exchange that you're looking for how many times have you guys personally been wandering through something in your prayer life.
Speaker: and you open God's Word, and the answer to those prayers is in His Word, right? And so it is it is an exchange back and forth, because when you seek Him... He says that he will reveal himself to you. Yep, yeah.
Speaker: For what it's worth, I agree with both of you. I thought it was interesting because I ah really respect the guy the one guy I heard say this. But immediately my mind was drawn to the story in Acts where Paul...
Speaker: in the quest of prayers to go to a particular place, Macedonia, uh, is... is given a vision which to me is from god sure it's him answering your prayer and he's saying no i don't want you going there sure there's somewhere else i want you to go and then there's other stories and you talked about moses the interaction with noah <unk> there's all kinds of places i think the one thing i would caution is when we read the bible we turn the page and we think oh look god talked to abraham god talked to abraham god told to abraham
Speaker: Well, there's gaps like 20, 30 years between those stories. that Abraham did not have such a relationship with God that he was literally talking to him every day in that manner. So don't be surprised if sometimes there is a delay and ah in walking out these stories. to your point, Ridley, there's certain parts of scripture.
Speaker: we're able to see that ah there's prescriptive natures that we can kind of insert into our prayers, but not everywhere in Scripture. Right. it's not and not all alike so we have to be very careful about how we pray scripture, because some of it was just for these individual people, and some of it may be for the endurance of those general concepts. and i's say Let's say even if. Let's say it was a monologue.
Speaker: Does it change how we should pray? No. No, because Scripture still gives us all the instructions. Pray without ceasing, ah pray with thanksgiving, all those prescriptions are still there. and so regardless of whether it was i believe it's a dialogue but regardless The command is still the same, and that's to be in constant communication with the Lord. Yeah, for sure.
Speaker: All right, rapid fire. I'm going to give you all four questions. joe Who wants to go first? John does. Okay, here we go. John, what question number one. What do I do about getting distracted? Because I distract get distracted every time I pray. I'll take it, unless you want it. Okay, go for it. Go for it. I have to pray out loud.
Speaker: If I pray in my head, I start thinking about my shopping list or what I have to do for the day or whatever it may be. I have to pray out loud. That's that's how I remove distraction. sorry Go ahead, John. Answer the question.
Speaker: ho ah To eliminate distractions, I almost have to kind of like... write down a mental note of what i'm going to pray about uh i'll say hey i've got one two three whatever it is on my mind i'm probably not gonna pray about 20 things so i have to list what it is and make it palatable like make sure i can chew on those three or four things and go to god with us
Speaker: Yeah, so I think about two different kinds of distractions for me. Number one is the distractions that are external. yeah So in that case, I would say I encourage you to have a place, have a plan, have a journal.
Speaker: Do it at the same time every day, your regular prayer time. yeah ah But the Bible in 1 Thessalonians says very clearly to pray without ceasing. yeah That does not mean you walk around with your eyes closed all day long. It doesn't mean that you're constantly talking to God out loud, which is going to scare a lot of people around you if you're doing that all the time. It may get you arrested in some places. um No, it just means that when you see something, maybe you're riding down the road, down the interstate, and you see somebody at ah at an interchange and they're holding up a sign. yeah You may not have anything to help them out with at that point. At the very least, you can say, God, could you please be that person? you know Those kinds of things, having that kind of mentality. ah The internal distractions, i like you, I pray out loud a lot more successfully than I do privately. And then I also would say, if you and I've done this in years past, if you use a journal, it helps to write out your prayers. That'll keep you kind of like a grocery list. It keeps you coming back to what it is important. Before you go into the second one. Yeah. The pray without ceasing, the way I've always looked at that is that we're including God in the conversation that's going on in your head anyways, right? yeah ah You're anxious, you're mad at the driver next to you, whatever it may be, yeah we're including God in on that conversation. When you think of it that way, you start tidying up your words, you start tidying up your thoughts and how you're interacting interacting with people because... you're consciously aware that God is part of this conversation.
Speaker: All right. We've already kind of touched on this, but I want to come back to it because it's the number one reason people tell me they can't pray. What if I don't know what to say? I would just say you're kind of like what I just said Even if you started out with Sangud.
Speaker: I don't know what I'm doing. I mean, he's going to honor that so much because he's like, okay, this guy's not pretending. He knows already you don't know what you're doing. Yes. So just saying really.
Speaker: what you're thinking out loud to the lord and if you're sitting in a ah you know if you're asked to pray for dinner same thing um a lot of times when someone's struggling to pray uh i will call them out to pray and so if we go to someone's house for dinner and you know that they've expressed that they don't like to pray in front of people i'm gonna give them a small group to start practicing yep and that's just to open the mouth and thank the lord for the food All right, question number three. are What if God seems silent?
Speaker: Doesn't seem to be responding. What what do I do? Uh... I believe that. That right there that we just talked about. Pray without ceasing. We're not praying because of results. yeah
Speaker: We're praying because of faithfulness. ah I love that's been a big word in my mind lately is we need to be faithful as he is faithful. And sometimes we do. We want the results. We want the the things to hit the ticker, hit the scoreboard for us to be like, man. All right, I'm going to keep doing this.
Speaker: But sometimes God will say, no, just be faithful. i Think about ah Abraham and Sarah. And... All those years that they did not have. children and it's like All right, here we go. We're trusting you, God. So just be faithful even when you don't see the fruits of...
Speaker: maybe your labors and maybe i don't know if this is even working just start simple start very very plainly like you're talking to your friend i was talking to a guy and he had prayed for his his basically particle signer.
Speaker: for 20 years. And he's praying and praying and praying, no results, no results. ah But little did he know that God was placing people around his son that were followers of him. And after 20 -something years, he he had accepted the Lord, right? And so if you think of praying for something for 20 years and having no yeah return on it...
Speaker: The faithfulness is what you're talking about. yeah And then finally, after 20 years, he accepted the Lord. so Just now. just It may not be now. God's god's working regardless. you know I heard a pastor one time say, um So what if he doesn't answer your answer your prayers? God's already done everything he needs to do for you. He owes you nothing.
Speaker: Even if he never answers a single prayer you pray. You're still home. You're alive. That's right. I thought, wow, that's that's hard because, we man, we want that bonus. We want that pay raise. We want that new job. We want that girl to fall in love with us. What if God says no, no, no, no, no, you know? um That's hard, but I think he's right. um we We get in such a consumeristic...
Speaker: approach to God when we get into our prayers. And I love what you just said. It's about our faithfulness to pray to Him, not His faithfulness to be there for us. yes He's already done everything He needs to. ah And we kind of touched on the last question. What if my prayers aren't answered?
Speaker: Whose is it my turn? It's all you, brother. free we actually We covered this in... in the disciple training academy had this year and dan sanchez had talked about prayer and he said you know some of his friends had walked away from the faith because their prayers weren't answered right hey heal my dad from cancer and then dad dies of cancer and he you know. And so... um We, again,
Speaker: we wager our relationship on the lord and how he responds to our our prayers you know and if he's not answering we get impatient or whatever it may be back to john's point. It's about the the faithfulness of doing what He says and continuing to move forward in that. um he You may think He's not answering your prayers.
Speaker: but he's likely answering your prayers just in ways that you don't see. now I think the response to that is, and I ask the question in return of the question. ah What is the right answer?
Speaker: you know of a prayer because we think oh this is the answer But no, God's saying... you think it is. That's your determination, but I'm seeing a hundred steps ahead. You're looking at just the one step. so Silence does not mean God is absent. Because he does some of his best work while...
Speaker: while we are waiting yeah you know i've prayed a lot of prayers in 59 years of life Never have I prayed a more sincere prayer. than the day I sat in the car after our accident.
Speaker: waiting for EMTs to arrive. And I prayed with every ounce of my being that God would keep my wife alive and that... my son would be okay. And. For whatever reason.
Speaker: So... I think. My obligation at that point is not to go, oh, God, you're not faithful. My obligation is to go, okay, God, what have you got intended next? yeah for Because you're the one that's wise. You're the one that's all -knowing and all -powerful. You chose not to act in that moment, so you've got something else in mind. Yeah.
Speaker: yeah I didn't come to that realization sitting in that vehicle that day. It took months to come to that point. but um it's an application that I have tried to help other people understand.
Speaker: Um, God is a loving kind compassionate being and when we pray to him out of love and faithfulness His only desire is to do what's best for us Yeah.
Speaker: So if it's not the answer we want, then it's us who should be looking for the answer he wants to give. yeah And that's what's really important. Yeah. It's good stuff. Yup. All right.
Speaker: Hey, you know what we need to do since we just got through talking about it? should probably We should probably That's why we pray. All right. John, why don't you do it for us? All right. Thanks. Heavenly Father, oh man, I just am thankful for... your provision. I see ah the the traces of your goodness throughout.
Speaker: my own life. And so as our listeners are trying to maybe figure out what prayer looks like in their own life, I pray that they would ah start simple. I believe that that's the way that ah He desires us to, just like children, to come unto Him. I pray that we would come with the questions. I pray that we would come with the thankfulness. I pray that we would come with just everything that's walking through.
Speaker: our minds and we would bring it to Him. So God, we pray that these things would bring you glory for the way that we pray, for the way that we worship, and the way that we we give our lives to you. We love you and praise you, and we hope this conversation has been just an encouragement to your heart and your church. We love you and praise you in Jesus' name. Amen. amen man Hey, thanks for joining us today.
Speaker: It just got called on video that I did not take my hat off during the prayer. My apologies to all of you. I was very distracted. They didn't go past us here. To hear that, I was distracted. Didn't go past the bill of cap. Hey, we yeah we're broadcasting live from the penthouse here at the offices at Groves Hill Church. yeah But we sure would love to have you come join us at church one Sunday, 8, 9, 30, and 11. If you're local, come see us, and we'll help you. We'll walk you through this prayer thing. We're all on a journey together, and we'd love to to find out how we can help you. you if you have questions comments you want to make feel free to reach out to us we'll be back here next week with some other
Speaker: entertaining topic that's right don't know what it'll be but we'd love to have you come join us in the meantime hope you have a blessed week and we'll see you next week Bye.
