Transcript
Speaker: My back's against the wall As you float through the room With all the things you've got To make you feel at home And that look that's on your face It leads me to a sooner chance than you
Speaker: Well, please darling just say something I need to understand Well, tell me why it is you're leaving I thought I was your man Watching the tail lights fade Up the street is the sun
Speaker: You don't have to be this way You know I hate to be alone Baby please don't go, don't go I searched the house and hope you left something But I didn't find nothing at all I thought maybe if there's something you've forgotten
Speaker: At least I have a reason to come And as I pace around I realize The only sound is my heartbeat Driving me insane I reach for you But you're not there Crying out to you But you don't hear Your promise should be there forever
Speaker: Up the street as the sun sings low
Speaker: Yeah. Can actual, uh, phone holder that will hold that. I did. I did build a phone holder, but it doesn't, it doesn't, it flexes weird. Each, each time I use it, it gets all out of whack. I eventually want to get me a tripod. Yeah. There you go. I've been looking at them for months and I just can't find one I really like.
Speaker: Ring light and all that jazz too. Well, that was my wife was like if we're gonna get one We gotta get one of the ring light. I'm like, what the hell for? That's my tick -tock and YouTube videos I do outside. Yeah when I do the podcast I turn the light on and which I just forgot to do Well
Speaker: Welcome everybody to our nonsensical nonsense. Hopefully you guys are having a good week so far. As always, I'm Glick. I'm hanging out with Jeff with another voice here. The crack head in the background. I'm there somewhere. This is just a, this is just a carrier of our conversation because every time we plan on going live around seven o 'clock or so, we usually wind up talking about 20 minutes beforehand.
Speaker: We have a half hour of a little bullshit session. Get the old vocal boxes warmed up. Yeah. Got to get our throats cleared and all that crap. That and it's a half hour of bullshit that just is pointless and 100%. Nobody wants to hear. Unnecessary to talk about. Got a little bit of this for you though, right off the bat. I was actually just going to say I have something similar. Let me see if I can do it.
Speaker: Almost as effective as you catch yourself on fire. After, after it lit, the fan hit the flame and I was like, Oh, I'm going to get my mic on fire. Mike, your beard, running back and forth on and off screen on fire. Like Ricky Bobby. You know what about that movie?
Speaker: The first time I saw it, I was like, all right, it's dumb, harmless. And we we met some people down here that we were mildly friendly with. We never really hung out with them. But they were they were they were talking about that movie and they were obsessively talking about it. And they're like, oh, it's the greatest movie ever. My wife and I got home that night. We're like, what's up, Cameron? We need to re rewatch that fucking movie. Yeah.
Speaker: And we watched it and I was like, wow, that's a big piece of shit. I did. I love that movie. I'm always it's good, but it's not. I mean, they made it out to be Citizen Kane, you know, I was like, calm down. Now, this came to me as a good movie. Yeah, I don't think they ever made it out to be Citizen Kane. I mean, it is what it is. It's a funny. No, I'm talking about the people, the people I was
Speaker: Talking with they made it out to be like it was their Citizen Kane and I'm like, yeah, I don't know about that. I've never seen Citizen Kane and I'm perfectly okay. It's a slow, slow, slow, boring movie. It's actually not bad, but it's, fuck, it's slow. It's boring.
Speaker: Well, I got, I got onto a kick of, you know, since I'm such a movie buff, uh, I found a list. It's like a hundred movies you need to see before you die. Like halfway through the list, Citizen Kane's on there and I was slowly burning through the list. And I finally was like, fuck, I have to watch this movie. I watched it and I was like, that didn't change nothing in my life. Oh, that was kind of wet and squishy. Ooh, nice.
Speaker: No, you know greatest movie ever made was shawl check Redemption. Sorry. I love that movie Yeah, yeah, it was a good movie. I would say there's movie ever but I mean it was it was it was a good movie. Yeah well bad for Stephen King that wasn't or Yeah, right. Oh speaking of Stephen King. I read this today and I wanted to get your take on it now you I know you're not a car guy and
Speaker: but you are a horror guy. The movie Christine, about the killer car. Yeah. Being remade. I say blasphemy. Well, I mean, they remade it. And I think as long as Stephen King has a hand in it, that it'll be fine. Oh, I'm curious, you know,
Speaker: I would. I don't get wrong. I totally watch it. I love that movie. They also we did. They also remain pit cemetery. I never saw the first one. Oh man. You gotta watch the first one. That creepy kid.
Speaker: Although my favorite Stephen King movies had maximum overdrive. Yeah. The cars coming live. I'm like, Oh yeah. That was a really good movie. That was one of my favorite movies when I was a kid. I've never really seen it. I think, I think that's one of the movies I need to, I need to build me a horror list of movies I need to see. There you go. But, but, um,
Speaker: don't like horror you're not a big whore well that's what but as a movie buff i need to be at least informed even if i just watch the fucking trailer you know it happens by the way i got me one of my father's day gifts today rocking this new michigan wolverine shirt yeah suck it haters thank you pretty girl i love this shirt
Speaker: dry wick. I was like, I'm rocking that tonight. I always ask for the same thing every Father's Day. My wife's like, what do you want Father's Day? I said to be left alone. Well, for me, Father's Day has never been all that big of a deal. Especially the last
Speaker: several years. It was I honestly forget about Father's Day until like day of and I'm like, shit, let me fix my dad. You know, but yeah, which is about all I do. Yeah, the last couple years since summer has been around. She's like, no, it's your day. So it's it's got to be special just like Mother's Day, which I'm fine with. I'm just not used to it. So right.
Speaker: But uh, she said I guess she ordered me a couple things just came in today and I was she's like, you don't have to wait till father's day. Go ahead and open it. So I was like, cool. So I opened it. I was like, hell yeah. Well, like I'm not big on celebrating me in general. So like my wife was like, it's your 40th birthday this year. What are we going to do? I'm like, nothing. All I want to do is sit down and watch TV and
Speaker: Netflix chill and a little YouTube and maybe build something. You know, she's like so normal fucking day. I'm like, yeah. Yeah. Pretty much. I don't, you know, she's like, put it your for you. I'm like, and you can bring me home beer or something. I don't know. Yeah. No, that's, yeah. That's the other thing. Like, you know,
Speaker: Yeah. Birthdays for me are just, just another day. Kids forget about it. So, you know, again, until summer came around and that's what she said. She's like, this is your 40th birthday. We're going to do something for your birthday. And I'm like, yeah, you know, you don't have to worry about it. She's like, no, we're going to. I'm like, okay. Well, I think my 38th.
Speaker: My wife surprised me by inviting a bunch of friends over to a, there's a restaurant here that is, it's a Brazilian restaurant but they literally walk around with, they have carts, an onset cart is meat.
Speaker: and they will different kinds of meat and they got it on skewers and they'll cut off your piece and they'll keep coming to the table until you tell until you put the little sign that says stop like they have in the forest in the bubblegum restaurant and it just says yes or no and they'll keep coming by and then of course it's buffet style too for you know all your other shit and she uh she had a bunch of friends of mine
Speaker: people I hung out with and whatnot. And she made it, she, I had no fucking clue, but she's like, oh, we got to go drop off these, uh, these discounts for this restaurant. So let's go over there. And I was like, all right. So she's like, wait in the car. I'll be right back. And then she called me on my cell and she's like, Hey, can you come in here and help me carry something? I'm like, what are you carrying out of a fucking restaurant? That's where we get food to go.
Speaker: She's like, just bring the kids and come in. So I bring the kids and, and, and all my, all these people are sitting around. I'm like, these motherfuckers having this party didn't even fucking invite me up. And all of a sudden my wife's like, surprise. I'm like, you asked you to go in there and you said, you sons of bitches. Funny. Cause she's, she told me, she's like, oh, uh, you know, your friend, Dave and Vera and, and your friend Jane, they're, they're going to be having dinner there.
Speaker: They wanted to get a discount we sold discounts to the restaurant and she's they're gonna have a discount So we got to drop off these tickets. I'm like, all right Fucking bricks don't even fucking bite me. It's my fucking birthday fucking asshole. I
Speaker: And she's like, can you come and carry this stuff? And I'm like, I don't want to go in. She's like, no, come on in. I was like, no, fuck them. They didn't even fucking invite me. She's just get your ass in there. Make them help you carry it. Make them come out, at least say fucking happy birthday. And then it was like, there's like 12 people there that she invited. I had no fucking clue. And the first thing I turned to her, I was like, you suck.
Speaker: I'm not a big surprise guy. I'm like, you suck. You got me all pissed off. So because I told her she sucks, she's like, I'll never do a surprise party for you again. I'm like, good. I didn't want one in the first place. But yeah, for the 40th, I was like, just leave me be, leave me in my own devices. Look on the TV or look in that box in the closet.
Speaker: I'm not, I don't, I don't like, I mean, you want to celebrate me. That's fine. Let me get in my car and drive around for 12 hours. I'm good. That's how we can celebrate me or celebrate, celebrate something I finished or built, you know, be like, Oh, look, Jeff built that. Yeah. That's about 20 minutes later on a different subject. All right. Perfect. I'm not, I just do this.
Speaker: me on the other hand, I'm like, make it all about me. Worship me. Worship me. Bow down. Pions. I am your god. I'm the complete opposite of that. I'm not that important. Don't act like I am. Just stop. Yeah, I do.
Speaker: Just let me pick what we watch on TV and I'll be good. That's the great thing about having multiple TVs is like, uh, you guys are watching some dumb shit. I'm going to the bedroom. Yeah. But, you know, she, she actually, she actually had her, her mom pick up the kids on my 40th. So I had the whole house of myself and just relaxed and watch TV by myself. Didn't have to do shit. It was awesome.
Speaker: She went and bought me a bunch of sandwich stuff so I could make sandwiches. Here you go, fat ass. I'm the king of, you mean I have to cook? I can just make a sandwich call a day. Sit on the couch and eat your sandwiches, you fat fuck. Go ahead and watch your YouTube videos. Other than that, I don't remember my 40th. That was about it.
Speaker: It's been a minute since there was, well, last year, outside of last year, but before that, it's been a minute since really did anything for my birthday. I think I went out for my 30th. And then my 29th, we went out, but that was just because my birthday was on.
Speaker: My birthday's October 10th, so it's always 10 10, but it was 10 10 10 I wish I'd been 30 that year, but I was 29, but still it was kind of cool So I think we went out. I think we went out for that. I can't remember Yeah, I'm not I uh When you're when you're in your 20s And you know we can turn in 21 and stuff. That's a big deal. You know but once you hit that
Speaker: like 32 or 33, you're like, yeah, I don't care anymore. It's another day. Well, that's, that's the cool thing about this new company that I, that I'm, that I'm with this, uh, Pest control company, Zuckerman's. Uh, I wish I could say that because they're like, Hey, what should we be proud of where you work at? So say, you know, if you want to put it on Facebook, put it on Facebook. But, um,
Speaker: in the thing or they like they they give you the day off for your birthday and stuff like that. Oh, wow. Give you the day off for your birthday unless it was like a weekend and you're already off on the weekends. Right? Exactly. Most companies are like, fuck your birthday. Well, it's like when you're in your 20s when you when you're, you know, you're working at McDonald's or some shit, you're like, it's my birthday. I'm not coming in.
Speaker: once you hit 32, they're like, we don't give a fuck it's your birthday or not. If you don't come in, you might as well not come in the next day either. Yeah. I wish there were, I really wish there was like an AIDS movement where you could age people out of McDonald's with people that try to turn McDonald's into a career. I mean, don't get me wrong. The managers and stuff are usually older, but yeah, unless you're like old and you've retired and you're looking for like part time work that it's like,
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. There has to be a gap area from 30 to, to, you know, 60 or something like that. Apparently we ain't doing anything for my 40th birthday. So summer and Facebook welcome pretty great. There you go. There you go. Fair enough. Just another birthday. Yeah. Yeah. Speaking of birthdays. Yes.
Speaker: it'll be a funeral. Apparently, my 40th birthday is going to be my funeral. So, Jeff, we have. I was planning on mine in my 40th. We have officially four more months of doing this podcast before. You're going to be killed. Apparently. Before I'm killed. So, let's make the best out of it. But speaking of speaking of birthdays, not that they'll hear it. Maybe they will. Hell, I don't know. But
Speaker: got a couple things here about these guys. Kat Mertus faces extraordinaire from Blacktop Mojo is celebrating his birthday today. So happy birthday to you, Kat. Happy birthday, sir. I reached out to him earlier on a little Instagram, commented on a photo. But also speaking of Blacktop Mojo, they got a new album coming out, I think. Yeah. I think September. And then yesterday,
Speaker: see if we can get Jeff to be quiet for a minute because I don't know how this is going to come across audio wise. Well, yeah, if you want to go and play that real quick, I'm going to yell at my kids. But yesterday, yesterday, I'll be right back. Blacktop Mojo released a new song off their new album. I'm digging it. I don't know if most people have heard it yet or if they even care, but that's our guys and they are so gracious to allow us to
Speaker: play their music on the podcast. So I wanted to play just a little bit of this. A little 30 seconds, 45 seconds. Hopefully it'll come across okay. Get past this intro. It does have a...
Speaker: I looked at all your face and it leads me to a sooner ready chance I know what I did right now Well please darling just say something I need your honesty Well tell me why it is you're leaving
Speaker: But so that's tail lights. That's our new song. They just dropped fantastic song. You guys want to hear the rest? Excellent. You can find it on Amazon Music, Apple Music, Spotify, YouTube, YouTube as a video Deezer. I don't know what the hell Deezer is. I don't know. Matt didn't seem to know what the hell Deezer was either. So there you go.
Speaker: I think it's kind of similar to when we publish something that goes out to all these places we've never heard of. Yeah, and it's also on SoundCloud. But stream the hell out of it. Share it with your friends. Like I said, it's blacked out mojo tail lights. Help them hit the... I don't want to do a Spotify spotlight or something like that for musicians if they get so many streams.
Speaker: whatever they they they promote the shit out of it and put it out there for everybody. But I love the nonsensical nonsense sent you. Yeah. I love the song. And of course, you know, it's good. That's that's one of those one of those songs where they just kind of let Matt's vocals just just fucking shine. Oh, yeah. And they were live yesterday on Facebook and Instagram. And they were also talking about their tour dates and they are all over the place in summer.
Speaker: They got two shows here in Ohio, one in Cleveland and one in Columbus. I'm gonna try to at least make one of them, hopefully. I love to see these guys in concert.
Speaker: and whatnot, but let me give them a little love, little shout out, you know, they're gracious. Like I said, they're gracious enough to allow us to, uh, put their music on our shitty podcast. So that's the one highlight. And they don't, they don't charge us either. If you like rock music and you like black .mojo, you can listen to the first two minutes of the podcast and fast forward through the rest of it and listen to the last two minutes.
Speaker: I don't know if they listened to the actual episode or not but they probably just listen to you guys, you know.
Speaker: But now I just want to give those guys a couple of minutes because I don't feel like we think of allowing us to use our music. Not only allowing us, but it seems like they may or may not know who we are. Yeah, which is actually kind of cool. But hopefully, like I said, I'll get to see it. We're famous in only small circles. Small circle being.
Speaker: I don't know that you and I could make a circle. This is our circle. Does not mean you're a circle. Yes. Summer was in Jeff's life. I don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker: I feel, I feel, I kind of feel like you feel tonight because again, with, you know, this second week of my new job and I'm working a lot longer hours, I'm working a lot more hours. So I haven't had the time, but I had the time, but I just come home from work and I kind of for the day. Yeah. Yeah. That's the thing when you, when you work long hours, you come home, you're like, fuck, I don't want to do anything else.
Speaker: Yeah, which again, it's not like it's the hardest thing in the world to to look up news articles. And my dumbass was thinking I was going to be able to sit down tonight. Apparently, that's not going to work out in my favor. You're going to stand up again. Yeah, that's not going to work out in my favor because that's just not enough padding on that seat. So let me fix my camera again. I can still hear you. Yeah, that's fine. No, I I'll go ahead and tell a little story. What happened to me last night? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, crippled bastard.
Speaker: Well, it didn't help that it was like, I, I, I was awake to almost two 30 last night and I finally went to sleep and I may have been asleep for maybe 45 minutes. So I wasn't 100 % asleep yet, but my wife wakes up and we, we had fallen asleep in front of the, in front of the TV on the, on the reclining love seat that stares at our couch. And she asked me, she's, can you put my phone on charge? So sure. Well, I had my charger in the kitchen.
Speaker: So I went to get up and my wife constantly, I don't, I don't get it. It's 3000 degrees and she's got a blanket on her. And instead of actually putting the recliner sitting it up, I was like, I'll just stand up because I'm apparently lazy. And my foot got caught in her blanket and I face planted up against the DVDs and my knees slammed onto the fucking hard floor.
Speaker: so hard that I lay on the ground for 10 minutes. And my wife's like, why are you laying on the floor? And I was like, you didn't hear me fall? And she's like, no, I fell asleep. She was like, I was, ow, homie. She literally asked me if she put my phone, if I put her phone on charge and then fell back asleep. And I damn near break my neck. Smacking into the, cause I have, I have my DVDs hanging on a wall right in front, right underneath the TV. And I smashed my face into them.
Speaker: slam my knee on the ground, lay down on the ground, almost crying. Cause my knee, it was like every ounce of my weight slammed right onto my kneecap, right on the center of a tile. And it hurt so bad. Let's be honest. Yeah, she beat me up. No, you cried. No, I didn't cry, but I didn't cry. Fuck a dog. No, let's be honest. You cried like a little schoolgirl. I had a schoolgirl with skin knee. Yeah.
Speaker: No, it wasn't. If you're in a relationship and you need help, blink twice. Do you need help? No, it wasn't like a pain from hitting. It was like, you know, you have that like electric shock through your body. You were embarrassed. Kind of thing when you hit something, almost like when you hit your funny bone. That's what it was. And it crippled me for like two seconds. The fortunate thing for you being only three and a half feet tall. I wasn't far from the ground. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, I saw it coming. I saw that coming. Yeah. That's what she said. But it was, it was, it was a weird thing. It was like, I've, I stand up like that all the time, but I stood up that last night and I just, wham, like I was a drunk alcoholic midget. I need to befriend a drunk. I need to befriend an alcoholic midget. I know a couple of them. That'd be cool. I know, I know one here.
Speaker: No, he actually he works for the pirate ship. No, he works for the pirate ship. Basically the circuit. Yeah, basically. Well, it's it's he's part of the entertainment staff on the on the Jolly Roger is what it's called. There's two pirate ships here. One's called Captain Hope. One's called Jolly Roger. And it's a dinner show. They're not real pirates. They're fake pirates. Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Speaker: That still blows my mind fucking Disney. I was literally flicking through old movies on Disney Plus yesterday looking for other ones to say the same shit. So my watch list says I've started like 15 movies. But I'm like, I don't really want to watch this. I just want to see if they give that stupid thing.
Speaker: I'm looking for warning labels, damn it. Yeah, it was. Oh, it fucking hurt so bad last night. But the kicker was my wife going, why are you laying on the floor? Yeah. Well, I mean, could be worse. You could you could have gotten in trouble for being an asshole like I did. Yeah. Well, I got in trouble today because. So last night, Summer and I had been watching all the conjure movies. You know, she went through and watched them all in order.
Speaker: I've been sleeping on Annabelle and McConjering and The Nun and Law, Lorraine, or whatever the hell it's called. And so I'm just now, just recently started watching all those movies. Right. I wanted to get through all of them before I watched the new Conjuring movie. Well, Summer went through and she was
Speaker: She was watching them in chronological order, which I'm going to probably do this weekend because the kids won't be here and I'm a loser with no life. So I'm going to rewatch movies that I've just spent the entire week watching, but I'm going to watch it in chronological order. But, um, so last night, I do that with the Marvel movies. Yeah. Last night she called me. She's like, have you started watching conjure three yet? And I literally just turned it on and she's like, well, let's watch it together. Yeah. For those of you that don't know, I'm my girlfriend lives in Tennessee and I live in Ohio.
Speaker: So we don't get to do things that most couples do or whatever. So we were going to watch a movie last night. So I came in and I was out in the living room. So I was like, well, let me go in the bedroom and kick the kids out and all that jazz right now on my bed. And we started watching the movie together. FaceTime and we're watching the movie. We're at the same point and all that. We had about halfway through the movie and without any, usually I have a warning, like I'll start to nod off or doze off.
Speaker: Well, any morning, buddy, it was, it was lights out in my world. I was gone. Yeah. Then I woke up like, I don't know. I woke up in the middle of the night because when you're old, you wake up two or three times a night to go take a piss. Yeah. Um, and, uh, when did that start? That's what I want to know. All of a sudden, when one day the next you're like, fuck, I got a piss again. Yeah. So needless to say, I got up and she had hung up and I was like, I'm such an asshole, man. Like we're watching a movie together and I just fall asleep.
Speaker: So tonight when she got off work, she called me and we were talking and she's like, your bitch ass fell asleep. And I was like, I was like, well, was it good? And she's like, well, maybe if you would have watched it all, you would have known. I don't even feel horrible. Damn, I didn't mean to fall asleep.
Speaker: No, but you know what? My wife does that all the time. Well, I'll end up watching the same movie four or five times because she'll sit down and she'll like, I want to watch this. I'm like, all right. Yeah, that sounds good. We'll watch this. And we get past the credits and I look over and I said, that was funny. And she's like snoring. And I'm like, well, I guess.
Speaker: We'll watch it again tomorrow. But at that point, I'm into it. So I'm like, fuck, I'm gonna finish it. Yeah. And that's what I told her. I was like, how many times have we started a movie and you fell asleep and you're passed out snoring, swamming all over the place, farting on me. It's just like, that's after a long day of me driving up there and then we go to the grocery store and I'm like,
Speaker: I suck, you're right. I'm a terrible boy. Just take your punishment, Chris. Just take it. That's pretty much what it was. I was trying to throw the blame on her. She's like, nah, nah, not today. I'm gangster. And you're like...
Speaker: speaking of stupid people and being a jackass. So even though I was saying like with this new job, I just, I haven't done my typical prep show prep. So tonight I was going to 100 % just fucking wing it with news articles. You know, I got a couple of websites that I go to and they never let me down. So I'm listening.
Speaker: So this is actually a story I heard on the radio today and I'm glad that it popped up because I wanted to see the rest of it. This comes from glorious old snowflake, Bill USA, California. Man stuck for days inside of a giant fan at a California vineyard.
Speaker: And a fan, like a watch fan kind of thing. Yeah, you know like the big exhaust fans on the side of like buildings and stuff like that. Nice. So this is at a vineyard. So this is a... Oh, a vineyard, okay. Yeah, at a vineyard. This is a Sanerotic... Words are hard. I can't even get past the first two words. It's gonna be a fun night. You ain't drinking that much yet. No, exactly. Maybe that's the problem.
Speaker: So Santa Rosa, California, authorities rescued a man who said he had been trapped for two days inside of a large van at a Northern California vineyard. The man was discovered Tuesday by a deputy responded to a call about a suspicious vehicle parked near the winery in Santa Rosa.
Speaker: It was his. The deputy saw a hat on a piece of farming equipment and then found the man stuck inside the shaft of the vineyard fan. Firefighters rescuing the man indicated that this is what his excuse was. He said that I like to take pictures of engines of old farm equipment. Sure you do buddy.
Speaker: After a thorough investigation, why there was a thorough investigation to this, to discover if this fan was an antique or not, because it's clearly an active venue. Which revealed the farm equipment wasn't antique. The man had far more meth than camera equipment. Nice. So the motivation to climb into the fan
Speaker: Fanshaft remains a total mystery. 38 year or 38 year old man will require medical treatment, but is expected to make full recovery, blah, blah, blah. And then he will go to jail. He's going to be charged with trespassing, drug possession, as well as violations of probation. So he's on probation. And it says the fans are used to circulate air across the vines to keep grapes from freezing during colder months. So OK. So it's like.
Speaker: It's a hobby of mine to climb inside of antique farm equipment, obviously not an antique farm equipment and take pictures. Where's your camera? Got an old bag full of meth. We don't know why he climbed into the fan. I think the bag of meth kind of explains it. Yeah, I think he was dipping in his own supply.
Speaker: Yeah, I guess he had two days to think about what he was doing there. He's like, I'm going to get caught. I know I'm going to get caught, caught or die. So if I get caught, I'm going to think about what I should do, what I should say. Yeah, it's just a few fucking dummies. Why would you climb in that vent in the first place? And maybe he was trying to stash.
Speaker: I don't know. Have you ever done meth? No, no, I haven't. Well, I mean, have you ever talked to a method or crackhead or anybody on drugs? I've talked to people on drugs, yes. Is there any explanation as to why they do the things they do other than? That is a good point. As Rick James said, drugs are a powerful thing. It seems like a good idea at the time. Speaking of crackheads, today we were we were down in the hood at work.
Speaker: and uh I get out of the truck and and I'm trying to grab supplies and I think I thought I heard a voice behind me and I just ignore it and I heard it again. I turned around and I was just a **** crack -headed lady and she's like y 'all um do you do you guys do you guys take care of raccoons and I went proceeded to keep ignoring her and doing what she's like I ain't got raccoons but my neighbors do and I'm like well that sounds like your neighbor's problem
Speaker: And she continued to talk and I just walked across the street with my boss who owns the company. And he tries out to laugh and he's like, that was the perfect response to the crack. And I was like, what's that? He's like, he's like,
Speaker: there's nothing worse than being 100 % sober and having to deal with somebody under the influence of anything. Yeah. Well, I told him we were so far gone that they can't even spell their own name. Yeah. I told him we were saying that the door after we knocked on, I was like, I was actually getting ready to tell her to talk to you because you were the boss. He was like, I don't know. I think I'm like a sword. I'm a giant white dude.
Speaker: Uh, nothing to see here. Nothing to see here. Just a white guy walking along carrying pesticide. I could have bought a pack of soda and made some money. Like, you know, this is actually, you can get high on this stuff. Really? Yeah. This is a new form of crack, crack. Hey boss, how much does this stuff cost by the ounce? I'm about to make you a profit, sir.
Speaker: It's sad when people are addicted to drugs, but they are amusing as hell.
Speaker: I get that. It seems like they went through a box -up crack. If I was a betting man, I would have sued a baggie. She says that she'll see somebody that's down on their luck or whatever, and she's like, I wish we could help them.
Speaker: Well, we're in the car going 65 miles an hour. I don't think we can really help him at this minute, you know. The other day, we came out of a convenience store and from getting, you know, pack smokes, coke, whatever, so we can go home. And yeah, and this guy's literally sitting up against the side of the building. He's obviously drunk off his ass, passed out.
Speaker: And she's worried that he's gonna get robbed. I'm like, well, yeah, this is not the best neighborhood, number one. Number two, let's get in the cab and get the fuck out of here for the people that rob him are gonna rob us, too.
Speaker: And she's like trying to wake him up. She's sitting there going, uh -huh, hum! Real loud. Will you get in the fucking car? Get in the fucking car! She's literally talking to strangers like, do you know him? And I'm like, shut up, woman. I'm the widest thing for 40 blocks. That's how, that's how, so she'll see somebody walking down the street and she'll like, I want to give him a ride.
Speaker: mainly old people. My wife, she saw this one girl, she's a Mayan girl, she's like indigenous to Mexico, you know, and she's got a little baby and she's sitting out there waiting for change and shit. And my wife's like, I think your baby's sick, you should take him to the doctor. You know, he's got a runny nose and shit.
Speaker: And she's like, oh, I can't go to the hospital. Apparently what happens is these indigenous Mayans, they don't have birth certificates themselves. So getting a birth certificate for the kids is impossible. And so this girl was hesitant to go to the doctor. And they have doctors at pharmacies that cost like five bucks. And they give you an analysis.
Speaker: Yeah, they got the quick clinics. We got those up here. Minute clinics, like CVS. Yeah, exactly. And the funny thing is, is like, even though this woman is tequere Mexican, she doesn't speak Spanish because she speaks Mayan with a little bit of Spanish. So it's like indigenous language. And we ended up getting in the cab with this girl, taking her over to the doctor and the doctor was like, Oh, excuse me.
Speaker: the doctor was like, Oh, I'm not going to treat her. And my wife's proceeded to bitch the doctor out till she treated the kid. And it's, it's, it's a, it's a racist thing. It's like, you know, it's not really a racist, it's a classist. Yeah. You know, and it just,
Speaker: And my wife, uh, we got done and we spent a good hour and a half helping this girl out. And as we're getting home, my wife's tearing up cause she's all sad for this girl. I was like, you know what? You were the fucking nicest person I've ever met because I wouldn't have taken two looks at this girl. I'm like, you know, not because I'm an asshole because it doesn't cross my mind.
Speaker: Not my business. Exactly. None of my fucking business. That's what I tell Sarah. I was like, she's like, I just want to pick her up.
Speaker: old people or whatever. I'm like, you can't just go picking up strangers on the side. They're old. Have you seen the mass that are out there that are lifelike? You know what's going to happen? Rapey, rapey, choppy, choppy game. You know, some, some psychopaths will be wearing an old man costume and they're going to be like, oh, come on, old guy. I feel bad for you. It's hot. And he's going to get in the car and be like, ha ha, bitch. Stop, stop. He takes his mask off. What the fuck?
Speaker: It's weird how my wife is so caring about complete strangers, complete strangers. And I'm just like, yeah, I got to go. Yeah. Me, I see a guy holding a sign on the side of the road. I'm like, get a job, you fucking piece of shit. Yeah. Well, I guess that it's not it's not easy for anybody for everybody to get a job. But what it's like.
Speaker: There are things you can do other than beg. There's those guys that refuse to beg and they'll stand in Walmart parking lot and help you back your car out. And my thought is, if I can't back up my fucking car out of a parking lot spot when I'm surrounded by zero cars, I shouldn't be driving. And my wife's like, give him a couple pesos.
Speaker: Now, I just, in all honesty, when I do get stopped at a stoplight and somebody's sitting there, it's like that awkward news. We're saying, don't look, don't look. Yeah, you sit there, stare at the windshield. I can't help you, dude. I work for a living, and you probably have more money than I do. Don't make me feel bad. I'm like, you probably got, well, we got guys out here. Every stoplight, there's at least two guys that'll clean windshields.
Speaker: I'm like, I just got the windshield cleaned three blocks ago and every block I'm like, no, I'm good. It's clean. You know, no, I, I, I, I, I just get home. Yeah. I feel bad to a certain degree, but then at the same time, it's like, and the time we live in, there's plenty of honking companies are begging people to work. Yeah, exactly. They are literally, yeah, they are literally like,
Speaker: I used to drive for Washington's, for instance, when I delivered for them and down in Athens, down by campus, when I'd come off the freeway and my exit there was a stoplight, like usual. There was a guy that sat there every single day. Right. At least three days a week that I went down there. So I'm assuming he sat there every day and it says, and it had a sign and it said need work, will work. Meanwhile, 200 feet away from him, giant fucking Bob Evans billboard,
Speaker: now hiring immediate positions. It's like, so, so one day I had to start today. One day I had the window down and I was like, if you need work, why don't you go get a job? I said, every place around here is hiring people. Like, as soon as they walk in the door, right? I'm like, Oh, no, I see. It's easier for you to sit out here and bang everybody. There was a,
Speaker: a couple years ago. Well, this is like maybe 10 years ago. And as recently as two years ago, there's like five or six people that have been busted on camera pretending to be, you know, homeless, whatever. And then they at the end of the day, the person filming them follows them to their fucking brand new Mercedes.
Speaker: and do their $150 ,000 apartment or $2 million house. And they're like, well, what are you going to do? I make $400 a day begging. Yeah. Like what's up, Papa Molly? Yeah. Like, like that's the thing. I mean, why would I, you know, a much like up here with the, with the, with the unemployment, why am I going to go get a job when essentially I'm making $16, $17 an hour on my ass?
Speaker: Yeah. Watching Netflix. Yeah. But now it's, it's, it's crazy. Like there's people blow my mind that just, you know, we'll work, we'll work for food. Well, the gas station that you're standing in front of is literally hiring and hiring and you walk in the door and say, I want a job and they're giving people jobs. So go work. And then you can get food. I mean, I totally, I totally get it that that first week
Speaker: Two weeks or whatever is gonna suck balls because you don't get paid right away What's the difference what's the difference between that and not knowing if you're gonna eat tomorrow anyways Unfortunately in the last two weeks Okay in the last two weeks I've started two jobs right job didn't work out I was only able to work a couple days and it didn't work out and
Speaker: as I thought it was going to. So what did I do? Because of your allergies, it was nothing you could control. It's not like the job sucked or something. So what did I do? Once I realized that the job was not going to work out, I started looking for another job. And by the end of that week, I had another job. But unfortunately, you've got to wait that week to get your first paycheck. Well, have you seen this? Have you seen this chick on TikTok? She's got
Speaker: 3 million piercings on her face, her hair's like 14 different colors. And she's like, I think people should deserve a $50 an hour minimum wage. I'm like, what skills do you bring to the table that you think you need $50 an hour? On what fucking planet does anybody got to get $50 an hour?
Speaker: in a starting position, you know, to clean toilets or some shit. But on top of that, she's like, somebody left a comment. She made another video that says the comments that I would never hire you anyways because of your appearance. And she's like, I've turned down jobs like that because of people like you. And I'm like, well, no, you have 64 piercings on your face. Yeah. There's, there's, there's such a thing as professionalism. Yeah. But today,
Speaker: Um, the piercings and tattoos and stuff, they're, they're not frowned upon. Like they used to be. So a lot of companies, they do hire people with, she's got dead center of her nose, like 22 piercings. Yeah. And then she's got the bull rang and she's got them all over her face. You know, I get that, you know, you know, down here, the whole tattoo and show showing a tattoo, a lot of places won't hire you because of it.
Speaker: But in the states where it's like we accept everybody, you know, we're super woke I mean, it's it's not even that it's not even being woke or anything like that It's just becoming more the tattoos are or it's common They're not so taboo anymore. I was reading an article the other day that caught my attention I don't read a whole lot but this one caught my attention because it was a guy that was covered in tattoos he had face tattoos and neck tattoos and he had some piercing wasn't like
Speaker: metal face or or pinhead or anything, but he had some type or piercings on his face and they they showed him and he was he looked like a rock and roll guy, you know, he was shirt off and started tattoos and he was like, I bet you never guessed my my profession. So I'm like, OK, well, I guarantee it's not a radiologist. No, so I was like, oh, well, the guy is probably like a tattoo artist or some kind of artist or musician or something like that.
Speaker: And I got to read the article. Well, come to find out the guy is a child therapist that helps that specializes in, in, in trauma, like a child, Trump, child trauma. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So I was just like, I'm interested.
Speaker: I would never thought of that just because you know, that was the articles like you'll never guess my profession I was like, well, I should have known that it was gonna be something completely off the wall that He's not he's not running one of the MRI machine Which is a giant electromagnet You can't run one because you're not inside the room because I used I used to work on them
Speaker: So when, when we would go into the room, there was a wall that, you know, yeah. Well, I noticed you, they were just taking off, you walked in the room. It was an open room. There was a giant MRI machine and.
Speaker: OSU at the time, this has been years ago, they had a, uh, I think it was called a cat seven magnet, which was like one of the largest magnets in the world. I think OSU had one, there was a hospital in England that had one, and there might've been one more post and they had the regular MRIs, but you had to, anything metallic, your wallet, all that stuff had to come out and you left it in the bin, but the seven, even the metal rings on your boots.
Speaker: If you got close to that seven, it would literally pick your foot up off the ground just from like the metal rings off your boots. So, you know, you could, you could technically run the machine. If you had piercings, you just couldn't go in the room. You have to remove them. So I'm sure most people would just remove them before they went to work, which is what a lot of the nurses did. Uh, well, doctors, if they, if they had ear piercings or, you know, whatever, they just take their stuff out before they come to work.
Speaker: So, I mean, well, the funny thing is, uh, most piercings that you get are stainless steel and they're non -magnetic. Yeah, but it's still, it's still, uh, you know, yeah, it's a, it's a, yeah, it's a, because before, before we could even work on those MRI machines, we had to watch safety videos, obviously. Right. And, uh, in one of the videos, um, and I think it was like the Cleveland clinic or something like that, somebody got too close, thankfully.
Speaker: patient had just got out of the MRI machine but somebody got too close with an oxygen machine or an oxygen tank and they just looked that fucking oxygen tank clean off the car and sucked it right into the guy's MRI machine like a missile well i mean uh there's some serious powerful stuff oh yeah i know it's cat seven or i think i think it's a cat seven i could be wrong but it was something seven
Speaker: Um, you remember the commercial back in the day for super glue and it showed the guy with like the hard hat. Well, you could literally take a tool and, and put it on that and then fucking hang on it. Like my big ass could hang on it, you know, and just, just dangle for days. Like it wouldn't even, it wouldn't even budge. You know what I never got about the, the super gluing hard hack guy, you know, is like,
Speaker: Hardhats don't actually stick your head like that though. Yeah Literally we've wore our heads anybody who's ever worn those at the the lip isn't that big that you can just grab Yeah, it's like sucking me into your fucking world well scientifically Movies are on top of anybody. It's ever worn a hard hat knows that
Speaker: That a strong gust of wind will knock that thing off your head Do not stay on your head very well And I love how they're like a hard hat will protect you if a if a beam falls on your head. Yeah, no, it won't My head my head's not gonna crack open like an egg but my neck and my did everything below is completely shattered. Oh, yeah We used to walk around with our hammers and pop people with the handle the hammer on the hard hat
Speaker: how many times you smack your hard head on on a roof or something and it hurts just as bad as if you because you jam your neck and down into your shoulders and it's just like oh god yeah it's a you get that electric feeling down your whole spine oh just think about that gives me the willies we all know that a hard hat cannot withstand a shot from a power washer name into that
Speaker: From experience we know What's that what's that article I sent you that that lady that went to school as her 13 year old daughter That's I actually literally found about it found out about it on tick -tock and I was like, there's no way in hell this is true and
Speaker: because this woman has got to be what? Almost 40. I got it pulled up here. I just had to find out to scroll through our message. It says Texas woman arrested for posting as or posing as 13 year old daughter to prove a point on school shootings. So El Paso area mom says social experiment shows teachers were more preoccupied with students virtual learning than those in the classroom.
Speaker: Texas woman was arrested after spending an entire day. She spent the entire school day. At the middle school posing as her 13 year old daughter and documenting her experience online as administrators and most teachers failed to notice. Casey Garcia 30 of San Elozaro Zara Rio Aliza Rio whatever some some Texas town down down right.
Speaker: has since been arrested and charged with criminal, criminal trespass and tampering with government records. The El Paso County Sheriff's office was first alerted to this, uh, June 1st. How are they still in school in June? But I guess everybody's different. No, I think they were, they were alerted to it because they came across somebody's Tik TOK because she was actually posting Tik TOK videos saying, Oh, this pizza tastes like shit.
Speaker: So, yeah, they were alerted to it, drew first to several social media posts circulating online documenting the incident. The incident happened at Garcia Enrique Middle School in San
Speaker: Elizaro. Let's go with that. That sounds good. Located 20 miles southeast of El Paso. She was later taken into custody at her home and one video to YouTube titled going to school is my 13 year old daughter, middle school edition. Garcia is seen wearing a yellow hoodie glasses and a black face mask entering the school. Do I look like a seventh grader? No. Cool. Awesome. She says.
Speaker: Garcia said she put on fake tanner and dyed her hair to better resemble her teen daughter Julia or Julie When she walked into school, she wrote down her daughter's ID number and she had memorized She can be heard saying good morning to who she says was the principal Garcia said she spoke to another faculty member and then attended all of her daughter's classes Though some students eventually recognized her she thanks them at the end of the video for keeping her secret
Speaker: She has seen eating in the school with them. During lunch with her mask partially off, she also later shows a math assignment to camera and someone addresses her by her daughter's name. At the end of it, she says, we need better security in our schools. This is what I tried to prove. Garcia said in a follow up video, I did not do this to get viewed. Yes, you did shut up. Of course you did. I did not do this to get views.
Speaker: I didn't do this to get the likes. I didn't do this so people could be mad at me and I can never walk around El Paso again. This is exactly what you did it for. Yeah, it's like that girl on TikTok because she was like, I don't like white people, you know, and then dance is like a weirdo. She didn't say it because, I mean, it is probably obvious that it's true, but you don't do something like that and post it everywhere you can think of.
Speaker: to to not get any people going you know not yeah almost like a shock reactions so Garcia what I say that she said the teachers were so preoccupied about the students who were online that they weren't paying attention to the students who were
Speaker: physically there, which has been a problem. I know a lot of parents who have talked about that with the online schooling and the in -person schooling and some of the schools that are offered online versus in -school, that that's been an issue all school year because they seem like they are so busy with the online learning that they don't really have the full attention to give to the students who are actually there.
Speaker: Well, why wouldn't they separate the non -online to the physically there? Yeah, they should have a teacher specifically. One teacher doing the online learning, one teacher doing, you know, it's not that hard. I mean, how many kids are in a classroom? Yeah. So you take one classroom, which is about half the kids that are normally in a classroom, and another classroom, about half the kids are in that classroom, put them in one fucking room, call a day.
Speaker: But yeah, it says Garcia made it through all seven periods until the last teacher asked her to stay after classic and confronted her And she went went back like an idiot She's like, okay Bullshit, I got in my car and left. Yes. So there she just rambles on you know, blah blah blah and I think
Speaker: Just a bunch of dumb shit. So yeah, so at the end of the day, I mean, again, she was an idiot for doing it. She did it for a reaction. She got a reaction, but at the same time, it also did show that, that, you know, there is, there is a security issue. There's a correlation, but there's also a correlation between the online learning and the in -school learning. Um, the fact that there still is online learning is ridiculous in the first place because
Speaker: Not all schools, because we were still dealing with the quote unquote COVID thing at the beginning of the school year. Not all schools felt comfortable going back. Fortunately, my kids, they were in school all year round. No problems, no issues or anything like that.
Speaker: but some places, some states, some cities, they, they, and I'm surprised in Texas that they're doing any online. I was going to say, Texas is like, everything's open. Come on in. Texas is basically like, we're, we're actually, we're our own country. We're not even a part of the United States and fuck everybody else. Cause we're going to blame them because, because most of, most of the shit, but you notice, I guarantee you that's like a, a real left leaning, uh, community.
Speaker: Uh, because the right wing communities would be like, fuck it, send my kid to school. Fuck. Yeah, go. I wouldn't say there's many left leaning communities. There's a few counties, you know, you can, if you actually look at like, uh, if you could go back to the, the, the election map, you can actually see a couple, there's like maybe five counties that are blue.
Speaker: Yeah, one of the thing else is bright fucking red. But there are a couple that are blue. This is also coming from a guy who doesn't even live in this country and cares more about politics than I do. Than I live here and I can give two shits less. I find it hilarious to watch it. And you constantly will try to poke this bear
Speaker: I do. I shouldn't, but I do. I literally watch from, if I'm on my phone, if I'm on Facebook, I scroll through Facebook looking for anything that people I know have posted. Then after that, the rest of the time is on the video section of Facebook watching political shit.
Speaker: But because this isn't the time nor the place I know I try not to I try not to but it's it's I find it so What's it? What's it? What's word for it? Idiotic some of the people in the world Just go watch the movie idiocracy
Speaker: I actually discovered the trailer for that movie the other day and I need to watch it. It looks full of hilarious. I did watch that searching movie that I told you about. You've never seen any accuracy? No, I haven't. The thing is, there's so many movies come out and only about 10 % of them come out here.
Speaker: but that movie's been out for years it's 2018 yeah something like that but it's one of those things like if it's a low budget movie like or low if it's not a marvel movie or something it doesn't get really promoted here so i wouldn't i wouldn't discover it by regular ads or something the movie has been out longer than 20 uh
Speaker: Yeah, it's the fucking movie is 15 years old. It came out in 2006. Oh, wow. So I was going to say, there's no way that movie is only three years old. I know better. Well, it also comes down to the fact that there's so many movies I want to see that I have to. I'm like, oh, I'll get to that one kind of thing. And I think that's where a lot of it comes down to because a new movie will come out like, fuck, I want to see that.
Speaker: and I'll watch it right away. But something like it is a courtesy is one is like, I'll get to it. Just idiocracy. I'm going to make a whole new word. Give me two seconds. I have to go with my wife's on the phone. I'll be right back. Well, Jeff's going to go kill his parents or kill his parents, kill, kill, kill his kids. So
Speaker: while he's off doing that, let's just do a little bullshit ass story that it's just the strange things that that make the news. So we got a man that combines golf and running to break a world record. Uh you're rending or broke a uh
Speaker: gold or broke a Guinness World Record by playing two hundred and fifty two holes in the same are in the space of twelve hours. This is here took to the course that wow, that is. That is a long ass name. I'm assuming this is in Germany, but at a golf club, it was able to play two hundred and fifty two holes in the space of twelve hours
Speaker: Uh, here played the entire course 14 times during the challenge, which he had to complete on foot as the use of a golf bag. He was buggy was forbidden under Guinness rules. He bettered the previous record by 31 holes. So that's what damn near two games, two, two, two, uh, two full games of golf.
Speaker: and raise money for the Special Olympics in Switzerland. So that's pretty cool. So he had a cause behind it. He was raising money, and it was going to a good cause. With announcing the achievement, Guinness World Records said, Jurg attempted this record not only for his love of running and golf, but also to bring awareness to Special Olympics in Switzerland.
Speaker: help people through the power of sports with intellectual disabilities. And there's Jeff's kids. You guys are going to get in trouble. We're getting, we're getting bombed over here by just kids. So, you know, so he, I don't know if I'd want to do all that nonsense.
Speaker: Dude was golfing and running. Hello. Hello. Thanks for calling. I'm floundering here, but we're going to keep going. Got a stamp here. Let's see what else is going on.
Speaker: The world's most valuable stamp sells for $8 .3 million. Speaking of world records. We'll go ahead and stay on this trade until Jeff comes back. Hopefully, maybe we'll see what happens. It says the world's most valuable stamp has been purchased for $8 .3 million in London. Of course, it's London. Buy a dealer. It's a 1856 one cent magenta from British
Speaker: Ghana. I don't know what the hell that is. Gianna. Yeah, Gianna, Guana, whatever. Was bought at an auction in New York by Stanley Gibbons. It is known as the Mona Lisa of stamp collecting world because it is only one in existence. Interesting. Stanley Gibbons is planning to offer investors the opportunity to buy fractional ownership of the asset as the firm looks to move into digital collecting. So, I wonder if that's one of those NFTs.
Speaker: but how do you fraction off ownership of a stamp? Because it's not like you can go, oh, well, you can have this corner piece or you can have that corner piece. We'll cut you out to, you know, this little section up here at the top or anything like that. You know, it's a fucking stamp. But, um,
Speaker: I'm talking about just reading some bullshit ass stories. Why you were please continue. I'm actually waiting on DHL My wife just called me said DHL is getting ready to arrive. Oh nice Well, yeah, your kids made a little appearance Actually here why don't you talk to my son real quick? All right, I'll send him up but uh
Speaker: so the stamp has attracted record record prices throughout its history and it's last sold for what's going on buddy here we go good what are you doing man right now i'm watching the space the new space jam trailer the new space jam trailer are you gonna watch the movie oh yeah welcome everybody Jeff's son what's your name Kevin Kevin yeah what's your sister's name Michelle
Speaker: We got Kevin and Michelle here joining us while Jeff is off disappearing. And now they're gonna fight like kids do. Are you gonna watch the new Space Jam movie? Yeah, I watched the original. So, it's probably likely I'm gonna watch it. Did you watch the original? Yeah. What else? I'm gonna do a little interview with you. Is that okay? Yeah. Can I interview you? Yeah. What other kinds of movies do you like?
Speaker: It's not movies I like but the new the new movie I like right now. It's Disney plus Cruella. Uh I heard you guys watched Cruella last last week. Your dad was talking about it. What's your favorite shows? Do you watch shows or do you watch a lot of YouTube? Oh yeah. I don't need YouTube band shows. Who's your favorite YouTuber? I'm gonna be honest uh Markiplier. Mark
Speaker: Do you like, uh, do you like, do you like a blier? Oh, Mark. Oh, the gamer. Yeah. Yeah. Do you like, uh, do you like, uh, what is it? FG TV? Yeah. I like him too. My son, my son likes him. He likes him too. Yep. It's a good, it's a good family. Yeah. They're, they're pretty fun. Do you watch, do you watch more YouTube or more TV? Um, more YouTube than.
Speaker: I recommend a video game for your son. What's the video game that you recommend? You can get it on a computer or on a phone. It's called Fright Night Funkin. Fright Night Funkin. I'll have to ask you if he's ever heard of it. He plays Minecraft and he plays Fortnite. Fortnite Minecraft. I like those two. I have Minecraft on my dad's home.
Speaker: Yeah. Do you do like the creative and build great big castles and mansions and stuff? Yeah, it's awesome. I got this like another version of Minecraft because just to goof around because back then I didn't used to have the original.
Speaker: but I used to go on creative just boom boom boom make my own house hello that's that's what that's what my son does he goes on the creative and he builds these great big like massive houses one day I build a house in water he I think he's I think he's got a house underwater too no I made I try to make one underwater but it's hard it's hard
Speaker: It's very hard. I know he likes to build like he'll build like a like a tree and then he'll build the house on top of the tree like a tree house Yeah, like a big giant tree house and my his sister She's got a big old farm that she that she built on minecraft. So they get they get pretty crazy about minecraft. I don't understand it, but All right, go downstairs. Oh My goodness. Hi kids
Speaker: He said, hey, I want to start doing the podcast with him. I like him better. No, the thing is with DHL down here, if you don't, if you're not there, they reschedule a time when they, it's convenient for them. So like there is no going to the office to pick it up and all this stuff. It's a huge pain in the ass.
Speaker: So I went there, she called, she's like, hey, D, Chels outside, go pick it up. I went there and nobody's there. Oh Jesus. Then my son comes running out, mom's on the phone, she's trying to call you. I go back, she's like, he's there. I'm like, what? No, he's not, which vehicle? You know, the yellow one? I didn't see it. Yeah. And then when I went out the second time, he was, I could see his van. So no, I, uh, I just proceeded to interview him. I introduced him.
Speaker: Oh, excuse me. Welcome to the show and then I started introducing them and Michelle was over there. She kept poking her head in and making faces but I was interviewing them. I was interviewing them about
Speaker: his favorite shows or movies or YouTube channels and then we were talking about Minecraft. Which was very nice because I was floundering with some bullshit stories. That's why I mentioned, interview my son real quick because I know my wife's been trying to get this package for like four or five months.
Speaker: And it's literally stuff for work. It's like, uh, I forget what it is. I don't know. I haven't opened it, but, uh, it's stuff for work. It's like, you know, but, oh, what a pain in the ass.
Speaker: What's going on? Wally. Thanks. Welcome to the, uh, to the last shit show. Well, the last few minutes, I was just trying to write a lot, some bullshit stories. I was talking about some guy who broke the Guinness world record for golf and running ever in Switzerland. Uh, but he didn't hold a hole. He played 350 some odd rounds of golf in 12 hours. He beat the original record by 31 holes.
Speaker: But he did it to raise money for the Special Needs Olympics. Oh, good for him. And then I was talking about a stamp that sold for $8 .3 million that the guy who bought it is now trying to turn it into some type of NFT or something. So he's going to sell fractions of the stamp. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know anything about stamp collecting.
Speaker: Stamps or anything like that. I was just talking I was just talking to talk because I have a fucking microphone and I can do whatever I want I actually I actually did research on There there's a guy that he keeps popping up on my YouTube like homepage or whatever and it's him talking about this 20 20 year old limo and
Speaker: And blah, blah, blah. And it's like almost 40 foot long. And it got me thinking, if you remember way back in the day, I'm talking mid 80s, there was the world's longest limo that had like a helipad. And it was like over 100 feet long. And I was like, whatever happened to that thing? Yeah. And I could have swore somebody had bought it, and we're going to rebuild it for their YouTube channel. So I was looking it up, and apparently it's
Speaker: serious disarray Like it's only got like two windows left, but Yeah, go ahead, but it's it's a It's based on a Cadillac like a old El Dorado Where the front wheels it's got three axles in the front and the thing is it's basically a it's a hundred foot long and
Speaker: but it had like a hot tub in it, it had a helipad and all this stuff and I was like but apparently it's not being rebuilt on a YouTube channel but I think that would be a cool YouTube video to watch because I'd totally watch that but it's one of those things I have apparently it's not being rebuilt oh my god my knee is killing me from that run I ran to the gate and back
Speaker: Fucking old man, sorry. So that was cash. It was nothing on my door to ask if they could have a snack.
Speaker: And I open the door and he's like laying on the floor trying to, I don't know if he was trying to look under the door, which you can't really look under my bedroom door because it's flush with the carpet. So, and he was trying to, I think he was trying to slide a note under the door, like we're in prison or something. I was like, dude, you know what I'm recording? Just walk in. He was like, okay, could I have a snack? I was like, I don't care. You already ate your dinner, get your snack, Bob.
Speaker: Yeah. At this point, at this point, at this point, we understand that this podcast is a complete complete show. Yeah. So it's the 2020 of podcasts. It is. It is what it is. So we're going to try to just keep rolling with it. It's one of those things. It's like certain things. We, we each know that the other has certain things that we cannot control no matter what. Yeah, exactly. Hi, pretty girl. Welcome. No, your name is pretty girl. Not summer.
Speaker: Until we get, uh, Kevin, all your mama's in here. How was she? She's on, she was on YouTube. She said, hi to your, hi to your, hi to your kids. Oh, excellent. Yeah. She watches us live on YouTube because apparently it doesn't switch out as much. Apparently. So summer says, hi, my name is summer and I have a shopping problem. What did you buy now? Oh, but, um, yeah.
Speaker: At this point, you know, I know when we first started, we were, we were trying to... We were all going hoe about being in front of the camera the entire time. Yeah, trying to be, trying to be as... Professional? Professional as Saturday we're recording, you're just like, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom,
Speaker: I wish I had $125 to spend on myself. She's got this shop on Facebook. Well, I guess they have a brick and mortar store, but they go on Facebook and do a lot of lives and stuff. She says she spent another $125 on their boutique online. Good lord. They do have really cute fucking clothes though. I mean, I will give her that.
Speaker: Well, I mean, but I, that's probably more of an investment than, uh, than it is a expenditure. It's close. It's not an investment. Calm down. Well, no. And second, and second of all expenditure. Everybody knows we're both retarded. Stop using the big fucking hundred dollar words.
Speaker: or I will come to Mexico and kick you in the dick. I'm going to fly to Mexico. I'm sure she's going to actually make money on that, even if it's just stuff for her wear at the boutique. How is she? No, no. Summer is buying stuff from the boutique. So the boutique is making money. Summer is staying on it.
Speaker: Yeah, I can't help you there. She'll profit somewhere. She's like three orders in one week. I like the way you think Jeff, investment. No, I had to break it down because he's too worried about using his word of the fucking week to know what the hell he's talking about.
Speaker: I'm not going to fly to Mexico. I'm not going to fly to Mexico, knock on your door, and you'll be like, Clique, what's up, man? What are you doing out here? What are you doing here? Oh, what the fuck? You just kicked me in the dick, dude. And now you're leaving? What the fuck? At least they're for a beer, you asshole. I'm going to fly to Gooch. Your wife tried to sell me a tour in the airport.
Speaker: Oh, she knocked all her pamphlets out of her hands and gave her one. She said it's an investment on her looks. You don't need to spend any money on your looks. You're perfect the way you are. Fucking Jeff. No.
Speaker: I hope your wife, I hope your wife, now that she's got this new job and she's making really good money and she starts blowing it up dumb shit. I'm like, dude, it's an investment. It's not an expenditure. That's the funny thing, that's the conversation that comes up. She'll buy something from making money and I'm like, how come you can get that but I can't get a new drill? And she's like, because I make the money. And I'm like, I watch the kids, I do the dishes.
Speaker: do laundry. The only reason you can go to work is because you have clean clothes to wear. What you need to do is instead of phrasing it like, why can't I buy anything? Why don't you buy me a gift?
Speaker: Why can't you buy me something from time to time? See I can't do that. Summer buys me stuff. She buys clothes for me all the time. It's the shirt I'm wearing tonight. I'm not a big variation on clothing kind of guy. I say a t -shirt I like. I'm like how much is it?
Speaker: Oh no, that's too much. I don't like it that much. But I'm super easy to buy for when it comes to clothes. If it's sports related, it's a fucking win. If it comes from summer store, it's a fucking win. So I mean, like, look at my closet. Most of it is either sports or comic book related shirts. So I got my nerd shirt on today. I'm starting to get a collection of
Speaker: It's a stormtrooper with a tile. Yeah, that's a fucking, that's one of those, what is that? That's one of the guys from Lord of the Rings. What is that? Dwarf? What is that? Dwarf? Dwarf from Harry Potter? You're sitting there trying to figure it out. You're like, what's the nerdiest thing I could say? I'm trying to think of a fucking character.
Speaker: I can I can hear the gears rolling in your head. I'm trying to think of fucking damn it. I'm trying to think of a fucking character of one of the goddamn movies and it's just like I don't know any Jar Jar Binks. He's the man. Well, like I said, some said she had me buy adult shirts because apparently my sports apparel and my my superhero shirts are not adult.
Speaker: Yeah, my clothes are not adult. My wife, when we do go shopping, she's like, you need to do jeans or something. And I'm like, the baggy cool ones are over here. She's like, that's a kid's session. Uh -oh. Okay. We're back. In the summertime, outside of going to work, I'm in basketball shorts. I need to get new shorts.
Speaker: Yeah, when I, when I get home from work, I take my jeans off and I put basketball shorts on. And I have to, and if I have to leave my house after I get home from work, once I've changed, I go out and my basketball shorts and a t -shirt. Like right now, my whole outfit matches. I actually fucking match. I literally, I have like five or six pairs of swim trunks that I just wear those everywhere.
Speaker: but I bought like all my basketball shorts. I can coordinate them with any shirt I have in my closet. So, you know, I still I just buy I just buy everything and like all my swim trunks and stuff. I buy black like what's the black of the darkest one you got? Yeah, I'll take those. Well, I do try to stay away from I do try to stay away from bright colors on my shirts because as I as I told my boss that
Speaker: The other day I was like, I don't, I don't wear a lot of bright colors because I look like the fucking Kool -Aid man. Cause when we do an exterior spray, you have to have the per per the label and with pest control, the label is the law. If the label says it, you got to follow it to the fucking T with pesticides. So when you're doing an exterior sprayer, or if you're doing where there could be herb spray, you have to wear long sleeves.
Speaker: Right. So I was like, well, I've got a perfect shirt for it, but it's red. So don't make fun of me because I put it on yesterday and he was listening.
Speaker: But my boss is a smart ass. I'm not saying nothing, but just don't go through that wall. My boss is a smart ass. He's a big kid. So we fuck with each other all day long. Of course, he's also like two foot tall and he's a Jew. And I can say that because he says it. He makes more Jew jokes. He makes enough Jew jokes that I don't have to. That low hanging fruit.
Speaker: so I mean so I try to I try to avoid welcome to fashion talk you know what my whole thing of busting somebody's balls on something if if if you
Speaker: My balls is I'm gonna bust your balls on something else. I you know I I don't care if you're gay straight black white purple green yellow, I don't care if If you're willing to bust my balls, I'm gonna bust yours right back. Yeah, I take it as good as I can give it and I just saw that coming
Speaker: Fuck softballs, man. Walked into that one. So you're what they would call a power catcher. Hey, Holland, Holland, Holland, Holland, Holland. Just call me Johnny Bench. Yeah. So you're definitely gonna have to, uh,
Speaker: to remove and block that page. Summer says she's going to have to remove that page from her Facebook so she stops spending money. Once I broke it down and explained it to you, she realized you're not on her side anymore. Well, that's why I don't, I don't, that's why I'm not allowed to go on to Wish or I'm not allowed to go on to Amazon or stuff like that because I'm like,
Speaker: in the cart in the cart in the cart favorite favorite favorite and then i'll send links to my wife i'm like would this be cool she's like we don't need a floating globe i'm like it'd be cool
Speaker: We could use it to teach the kids. She was like, no, no. It would be cool to have, if you had $350 later, Jesus Christ. We don't have a number, Holland, and we don't do Collins because we're not that cool, apparently. Yeah, we're, yeah, we suck. We're working on it, though. We're as slow as we are. Okay, first of all,
Speaker: Okay, first of all, we are working on it would essentially mean I am working on it. I'm going to do a few things. I'm not working on it. So we are not working on anything. Well, we discussed it. We'll put it that way. That's us working on it. We've discussed it. Same thing with the merchandise line. We've discussed it.
Speaker: About as far as it goes. We've discussed the merch a lot more than we've discussed doing call -ins. The thing is, Holland is actually Kevin's co -host on the Kevin Hollis Show. We are a very low -end podcast. We're very low budget. Jeff is on his cell phone right now. Yes. In Mexico.
Speaker: And I am on my laptop. And it's facing backwards, looking into a mirror so I can actually see Chris. Because my front camera doesn't work. Yes. And I am on a laptop that I bought for less than $150 and I have a...
Speaker: Samsung S7 that I'm have the Facebook feed pulled up on so I can see the comments and then I have my other phone that I can blow up news articles and whatnot on. So, I have two cell phones as well. We're high tech. We are. We're living the podcast dream but you know, we're just starting. We're still trying to figure out all this ****
Speaker: $350 in your vacation clothes. Sweet mother of God, I have $0 in my vacation clothes because I'm just going to dive into my closet. Yeah, amen to that. Well, see, that's the beauty of my wardrobe is I can literally, I can go from a business attire to a podcast to vacation all in one shirt. I got one of them tuxedo shirts. I could go from
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, just just by cause it's full of glick fashion. You know, I wear what I wear. You don't like my novelty kind of shirt kind of guy. Yeah, smoking in the house. I got a suit laying around here somewhere. I did the whole thing. Kevin smokes crack and does blow off of
Speaker: transvestite prostitutes, peckers. Nice. Just so you know, Paul. Speaking of, speaking of fashion. Yeah. See, I love how we can just randomly. Transition.
Speaker: Um, accidentally stumble into news articles and I don't know what this means. I just seen the, I just seen the headline. I pulled it. I pulled a Jeff here. So I just, yes, he does. Actually I've seen him do it. I watched him do, I've watched Kevin do blow off of a transvestite. Chris was the transvestite. I was not the transvestite. Um, I was down there in Florida and a friend of hers, AA Rod and I went over to Kevin's and Kevin was like, you want to see a magic trick?
Speaker: And I don't know why you can't show your videos. And he pulled a hooker out of the pool bathroom, you know, out on his patio, and he was just like, watch this. And I was like, Jesus Christ! It's bigger than mine! What else did he come from? Oh, shit. Yeah, true story, Hollis.
Speaker: I would've taken pictures, but Eddie was singing Nickelback while he did it. It was so weird. It was a weird night in Florida. Well, it was a normal night in Florida. It was Florida. It was a weird night for me because I'm not from Florida. Aaron was like, yeah, this is just a typical Wednesday night in Florida. I was like, what the fuck? I mean, that was a Monday night, whatever. Yeah, like, what the fuck? What do you guys do on Mondays? Well, I generally come home
Speaker: have a couple beers and relax after work. Why do you have training hookers in your bathroom on the pool? What's going on? What's your fashion story? Go ahead and read that article. Sorry, we transitioned. No pun intended. It says a company is selling
Speaker: Kevin's always preoccupied with something else Kevin has no time for me. That's a whole other story But it says the company is selling wet jeans No, I know this I know this what it is is it makes it look like the it's it's Pre -stained to make it look like you pissed your pants
Speaker: I was just kind of thumbing through, and yeah, so. That's what it is. Why would you want that? So it's a fashion firm, a US fashion firm, Wet Pants Denim has launched a range of jeans that makes aware appear as if they wet themself. Wet Pants Denim has launched a range of denim that seems as if somebody has had an unfortunate accident. The watering stain in the front.
Speaker: The company said celebrities, influence, and everyday individuals alike are in search of these wet pants. Look, here at Wet Pants Zinnums, we are delivering an identical style with the need to feel uncomfortable. So basically,
Speaker: No, it's not a new version of stonewash. They've basically stolen the entire concept from what was that Billy Madison? Billy Madison. Yeah. Where, where, where, where the little kid peaches his pants. He's trying to make his buddy feel better because he pissed himself. Yeah. So he like splashes his pants and he's like, well, you're not peering your pants. Everybody that's cool pisses their pants. And somebody at that company was like, we need a new idea. And this guy's thumbing through Billy Madison clips on his phone. He's like, I got an idea.
Speaker: But, I would, I mean, why wouldn't you just piss your pants? Save yourself a couple hundred dollars. Just piss your pants before you leave the house. Yeah, I would like to know how much those pants cost. It doesn't show in the article. I don't think it does. Let me, let me double check. I'm doing a Kevin here, Jeff here. Oh, okay. So, so the denim comes in three different styles and colors with customers able to choose between blue, gray and white jeans. Why you wear white jeans? I don't know.
Speaker: And they, uh, they go for $75. Jesus Christ. So, so don't you know, you're not supposed to wear white after labor day. I've been told recently, I've never spent a whole lot of money on jeans. Like we have Royal King here in Ohio and it's kind of like a farmer type store. Right. And they have their own brand of jeans and they're $10. Yeah.
Speaker: And they probably last longer than those $75 ones. Not only do they last, but they also come with a lifetime warranty. So if they, if they rip or tear or anything like that, you take them back into Royal King, much like you remember. Yeah. You know, back in the day, you didn't even have to have the receipt or anything and skinny gay men wear white jeans. This, this, this I'm, I'm well aware of and they shouldn't be allowed to wear, uh, nobody should ever be allowed to wear white jeans.
Speaker: unless you're on board. Let me rephrase that. No man, gay, straight, or should ever, ever wear white jeans. That should never cost your mind. You wear gray or blue jeans. I won't wear a white shirt.
Speaker: I won't wear a white shirt because I would get it so fucking filthy. It's ridiculous. Well, that's because you're a fucking pig, man. You're a fucking pig. Well, you're that, too. No, but like I said, I was explaining this the other day. If something crosses my mind where I'm like, oh, I got to build that now, I don't go change and build it. I just start building. You know, I'm not going to talk about that. I scratch my head before every podcast, and all right, anytime I'm going to get a lot of
Speaker: I don't feel like I gotta make sure my wardrobe matches. You can't see anything but from from my chest up, but I gotta make sure I I could just in case you have to stand up literally. Yeah, everything match. I like I fully match right now. You know everything so I could you know if I really wanted to match I could grab my
Speaker: dark blue Michigan hat hanging up over there and just put that on instead of the bright yellow one. Yeah. No, but I mean, when it comes down to it, the whole white, white clothes are just, I don't know. Yeah, no, I don't know. And I've had these discussions with my gay friends and I usually just want to throw my hands out and be like, you guys are jackasses.
Speaker: Yeah. Well, it's the same thing with skinny jeans. Yeah. You know, my my brother, my brother -in -law, he's got a pair of skinny jeans and he came in the house one day and I was like, what the **** are you wearing? He's like, these are my new jeans. I'm like, there's a boyfriend like him too. Because Jesus. Well, yeah, skinny jeans and three gallons of cologne on. Yeah. Well, you know, you got a quarter in your pocket. Yeah. You got a quarter. You got a quarter in your
Speaker: Yeah. You happy to see me or is that a pack of mintos in your pocket? But it also comes down to like the reason why I don't wear skinny jeans is I'm constantly putting stuff in my pockets. Yeah. You know, whether it be, you know, my keys or my cigarettes or something. I don't want to crush my cigarettes because I'm fashion forward.
Speaker: because the material they use, my wife hates them, but I wear them all the time because they got 40 fucking pockets in it. It's like pockets for days, bro. I could put anything I want. I got, I got beer pockets. Don't judge me. If I'm going to the movies, oh, you don't have to buy snacks. I showed up, I showed up at the bonfire and cargo shorts.
Speaker: Well, hence the reason I still think cargo shorts and carpenter pants are cool.
Speaker: Why are you wearing cargo shorts Glick? Because I got beer pockets I can hold. That's right. I'll have to go to a cooler 14 times. I don't go to go to three. I can hold eight to 10 beers in these sons of bitches. Oh yeah. You keep walking back and forth. Hey, I'm too lazy and fat to walk back and forth all night long. If I can figure out how to drink this without lifting my arm, I would. Crazy straw.
Speaker: I saw, I saw a video that guy's like, there's a meme. There's a meme of a guy. He's got like a, a beer on his table and he's leaning back up against the back of the couch. He's got 14 straws connect together. It says my, my friend took his laziest to the next level. And I'm like, yeah, if you've ever drinking beer through a straw, he's going to have a hell of a day drinking, drinking a beer through a straw is, is, um,
Speaker: special. This is a lot. This is a lot about the person, but also it's it's it's not the most enjoyable thing because I'm not going to do it because I feel like some jackass will get a screenshot of it and then they'll be made of me. But you're sitting there just sucking like I got a 16 ounce can right now in order and I'm just like just
Speaker: When I when I first bought my first vape Buddymind sent me a picture and he's like he sent a meme and says what you think you look like it shows this guy with a vape Blowing out cool smoke rings. Um, and then what what you actually look like. It's a dude holding a cocksucker Yeah, like a dildo I was like, oh
Speaker: I thought my vape was going to cool, but okay. Yeah. So that's the thing like, yeah, I've, I've, I've told people in the past, bro, it's a vape calm down. It's not a dick because there are some guys that they just fucking treat that thing like it's a fucking cock and it's for Tuesday down on the corner and they're, they're trying to make their fucking rent. No, but I mean, the problem I had with when I had my vape is, is, you know, I'd get the nicotine juice.
Speaker: and i'm like and i'd always ask the same question which is the strongest juice you have for nicotine and they're like uh the five milligram i'm like can you put two fives together because daddy needs his nicotine they're like oh no
Speaker: Well, I don't know. I don't know what the regulations are like down there for you guys. But before the regulations hitting up here, I mean, you could get up to like 28 on the nicotine. Yeah. Now you can't get any more than six. But they do have the juice that you can add is a nicotine, nicotine additive. And you can add, you know, if you they're like, I think they're like three. So you can get like four or five of them and just dump them into the bottle. Oh, my goodness.
Speaker: Yeah, but that was the problem with my vape is I'd burn out the coil so fast because I literally hit it three or four times before it's one hit. Yeah, because it wasn't strong enough. We've already discovered that you give it as well as you take it tonight. Apparently. I'm just practicing. You never know. You never know somebody's going to come with me like would you be gay for
Speaker: 20 minutes while you shook on this for 10 billion dollars. Give me that thing. Give me the money first. Show me the money. Show me the money. I'll tell you what, somebody gave me a billion dollars to let me show you how it's done. Well, I'm glad that that you are a
Speaker: smart and independent woman and you spend your own money when I go live because I'm a broke self bitch. Amen to that. That just means I don't have to buy it for you. I'm a broke ass motherfucker. It's a good thing I do. I do a couple of things really well that she, that she keeps me around for. So she can't wait for the money. That's for damn sure.
Speaker: No, I mean, maybe one day we'll reach the level of success like the Kevin Holly show and we'll be able to, we'll be able to do Collins and then I will make sure that you and Summer are our first callers ever. Amen to that. Summer actually has called, uh, accidentally inadvertently, but. Yeah, but that was more of a happy accident as opposed to planned. Yeah. I know.
Speaker: My wife just saw my smoke it up here downstairs going, what the hell are you doing? You are definitely the breadwinner. Holland is so obsessed with one to call it because if I, you can call in, you can call me all day long and I can put you on speaker book, but here's the problem. You wouldn't be able to hear me. You wouldn't be able to hear Jeff. You would be able to literally just be Chris.
Speaker: quote -unquote translating for me like it like the guys over here fucking speaking Swahili yeah I mean you probably do speak Swahili because God knows lived all over the fucking planet but yeah you know and I've got to translate so yeah we don't do call it now summers in there you know what you guys just shut up listen well if
Speaker: here can take this but i don't know what the fuck we're talking about i mean if somebody can figure out a way to we can take call -ins and actually hear them on both ends i have suggestions i have i have a lot much like everything else i have to get i think i have to get a mixer board uh... shut up not shunning my audience fuck my audience
Speaker: I do this for you people. I do this for me. Yeah. No, I'm just kidding. Yeah, exactly what I do. Oh, shit. Squirrel. Oh, God. I'm gonna knock everything fucking over here. Hold on a second. Don't throw punch. Don't throw punch me. So, fuck. Yeah, I can't just fucking derail everything and pull the e -brake while these two are bitching me out in the comments. So,
Speaker: you know, as I was saying earlier, um, you know, my boss and I, we, we fuck with each other constantly. My boss is a little guy. Like he's tiny and this might get up. Yeah. Well, he's smaller than you, I think, but he'll get up in like addicts and crawl spaces and crawl around like a fucking spider monkey. No. Yeah. I'm six to almost 300 pounds. I don't do addicts and crawl spaces very well. So today,
Speaker: I climb up into an attic and I'm looking ahead of me and I'm like making sure I don't smack into anything as I'm climbing up the ladder and I raise up a little bit. Dude, I got about 300 fucking nails right into my back. And I don't know what my back looks like. I haven't looked yet, but I could feel the blood running down my back. And I was like, I feel like I'm gonna look like Jesus and beat the brakes off of me.
Speaker: No, that's the one thing about attics and crawl spaces that I don't do those because of the nails. Yeah, I just I don't do them because I'm a fucking ogre and I don't fit into those spaces.
Speaker: cross places don't bother me until it's like rats and stuff like i don't know i'm good i don't care i don't care about rats and shit like that i mean how today we got called out to a chipmunk in somebody's house and we literally it was under the couch and we literally chased it out and caught it with our hands no one wondered like the small ones that's not a big deal but i'm talking like the giant sewer rats that look like
Speaker: Chihuahuas. I will do some research this weekend. I will try to figure out how I can take photos. You know what? Holland, download the HAPS app, create a HAPS account, and you can join us. Jump on here. And you can join in here on HAPS with us for like five minutes. And someone can join us too. So we'll let both of you come in here at the same time. Yeah, like a Zoom call. Yeah.
Speaker: And you guys can come and hang out with us. That will be even better than a phone call because everybody would get to see your faces. Yes. Oh, we make fun of you. Well, no, actually, we'll be watching because the only two people that are watching right now are you guys and being jazzed. So, you know, no, but I mean, you know, we we do take the audio and put it on anchor. So yeah, we do. We put the audio on Spotify and all that jazz. So yeah, you know, once again, we're
Speaker: Oh, an hour and somehow changing the end of the podcast. And we'd get to even say anything about it. We took five, we took five minutes to talk about. Bring Stan, don't bring Kevin. We don't have any training hookers that need to blow off their papers, but bring Stan, just download the HAPS app, set up a profile, follow us. And then the next time we go live, we'll invite you. We'll invite you on.
Speaker: it's actually uh it's actually super easy yeah um what the fuck were we talking about before i said that oh yeah yeah we'll take five ten minutes to uh show love to tour guys in blacktop mojo at the beginning of the show and
Speaker: Now we're getting close to you. We have love to ourselves. You know, self -love is a very important thing. Well, like I said, you can't love anybody until you love yourself. I've had a crush on me since I'm 13. Yeah. So now, because not like anybody ever makes it this far into our body has put Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, nonsensical nonsense, TikTok, I'm Glick talk, TikTok, he's KTM.
Speaker: productions and then on Spotify, you can follow nonsensical nonsense so you can get every single episode of this train wreck that we do twice a week. Yeah. Yeah, Stan has been Stan has been extra unavailable lately. I don't know what his deal is. He can he can take time out of his day to make
Speaker: 300 bullshit ass Facebook updates How many stories on Facebook stories, you know, you put the little clip that's like 26 seconds or so How many do you post a day on a like it? Let's say you you've made like 15 tiktoks that day. How many of those do you actually post on your? Let me make it Real simple and real easy
Speaker: Facebook story. I've maybe posted three Facebook stories since they brought it out. Since they've rolled it out. There's some people that will have like 26 Facebook stories and it's like, you know what? I just wanted to see a little quick clip of something funny or whatever. I don't want to go through 45 things just to get one joke.
Speaker: Like, you know, if I, the only stories I post up is my, my tick tock automatically uploads my Facebook stories as well. So, you know, but it's only 26 seconds, but yeah, it's annoying. Holland asked if you know Kevin, you don't know Kevin, but I have you ever, have you, have you had the opportunity to, yeah, have you, have you had the opportunity to check out his podcast, the Kevin dollar show? I've, I've, I've, uh, caught a couple of clips. I.
Speaker: The episode where his daughter had gotten asked out to prom or something. Yeah, and his co -host was saying she'd go she'd do her hair or something like that. I would have been Holland. Holland's a hairdresser. Holland, is your salon really Holland's Airport down there in Newport, Ritchie? Fabulous Newport, Ritchie. It's not fabulous.
Speaker: uh, yeah, I don't care for the Facebook stories. I don't care for your Snapchat stories. I don't care for your, your, your, your fleets on Twitter. Um, and I don't post anything. I am the worst person in the world when it comes to social media. I don't, I, I don't, I'm very, very, very, very rarely tweet.
Speaker: And that's because I don't have one person following me. The only thing I ever do on Twitter is when I post a new episode. Actually, Colin, he shouldn't put thoughts by staying. That should be a hashtag.
Speaker: Yes. Stands thoughts. Stands beautiful downtown. Stands a trip other than the fact that when I went down to Tampa to meet all these guys in person, I don't know if I've ever told this story or if I've ever told you this story.
Speaker: A few years back, shortly after the split up, Kevin was like, dude, you need to get away. You need to come down, meet everybody. Kevin and Stan were - Get you some trainee hookers and - Yeah, and I don't know. Whatever. Do some blow off, some trainee hooker peckers and call it a day. But I'm like, I don't know guys, blah, blah, blah. Well, Stan was like, come down. You can stay at my house. It'll be good. You'll have fun. I'll introduce you to -
Speaker: because Stan used to do a podcast, Open Mic Live, and then Kevin's podcast, and then there was Spicola TV, and I was friends with all those guys. Right. And Hobby Radio, which is another podcast. So I was like, you know what? Fuck it. I'm going to come down for a week. So I got my vacation planned out. I drive my happy ass down to Tampa. I get about an hour from Tampa, and Stan calls me.
Speaker: I mean, we're in the process of buying this new house and we were supposed to be in there, but stuff fell through. We're at my parents house or whatever. I can't remember who's at his parents house or what it was. And I was like, fuck man. I had like, dude, I had a fucking Airbnb on St. Pete beach. That was going to be like $40 a night. And he told me not to do it because I wasn't going to pay for someplace to stay when I come to visit. I want to know what happened between Hoppy and Kevin Holland. I've
Speaker: I've heard various stories from both sides and I don't believe either one of them, but it's all like, fuck man. So another friend of ours, A. A. Ron.
Speaker: Uh Stan was like, I'll figure it out. Don't worry about it. You got an hour before you get here. Meanwhile, I'm on my phone and I pull it into a gas station. I'm like, **** it up. Pull into a truck stop. Airbnbs. Yeah. Like, I'm going to get something to eat. I'm looking for hotels. I'm looking for Airbnbs. Of course, there's like nothing available. I'm like, **** this. Goddamn. So, Stan text me back. He's like, I got you covered. Call me. So, I call him. He's like, alright. You're A -Ron. You know A -Ron. I'm like, yeah, I know A -Ron from the chat. He's been on Kevin Show a few times.
Speaker: Um, and, and he's like, Hey, Ron said you would crash at his place for the week. And I'm like, Oh, okay. Cool. Which actually worked out well because a brother and I had a blast together. He was awesome. But it was just like, here I am coming down to Tampa with a bunch of strange people. I, you know, I only know from online and, uh, randomly crashed into strangers house, which I mean, it was still a stranger, but you know,
Speaker: So instead felt so bad. He was like, he was like, look, dude, if I can't find you a place, I'll pay for the hotel. Don't worry about it. And I'm like, nah, you ain't got to pay for the hotel. I got it covered type deal. But what the hell is he doing? You talking to me?
Speaker: Yeah, you were like zoomed in on your fucking Yeah, I'm actually trying to read text backwards. We're looking up your nose, man. Sorry. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know either. To be honest with you, Holland. I talked to Kevin about it. I've given him. I've given him my thoughts on it. I don't know if he agrees or not, but
Speaker: you know, it sucks because Kevin and Oppie were pretty good friends for a second. But I had fun down in Tampa. I mean, they treated me like a fucking rock star. I was on Hoppy Hour. I was on Open Mic Live.
Speaker: I was on Kevin's show. I was on Spicola TV. Then we went out one night to open my thing and I got to meet a bunch of comedians that I bullshitted with in the chat rooms on various podcasts. And then another night we went out and I got to meet one of my favorite local bands down there.
Speaker: sunshine and bullets. Fucking love those guys. Nice. And they did a show and I got to meet them and hang out with them and it was it was a fun trip. It really was and everybody down there in Florida was awesome. I'm just being petty and busting Kevin's balls constantly because
Speaker: his old goofy ass after six years of supporting the hell out of his podcast can't even take five minutes to come say hi when I finally started one that I've been talking about for years. Well, the only the only in his defense, we do go live about the same time he does. No, I'm better than Kevin. He knows that. No, we went to I don't know if it was size splitters or not. It was down in the board. But we also go live twice a week.
Speaker: Yeah, that is true. We do live. We went, we went to a comedy club down in Ybor. Why did you have to just take a laxative? I, so I don't know if it was, I honestly don't know if it was side splitters or not because I was feeling pretty good because we went down after we did Spicoli TV. So I was already feeling pretty good before we got to Ybor. And then when I got there, I got to meet, uh, not that you know, any of these people, but I'm sure Holland does.
Speaker: I know, but I mean, it's an interesting story, no less. They're local comedians. Maddie Williams, Maddie B. That's that's my guy. I love that dude. We love each other. And one day we're going to run away together. It's Sam was jealous because Maddie, Maddie loved me more than he loves David. And that's the Rio, Rio, Paris and Shannon and a whole bunch of local, super funny Tampa comedians.
Speaker: Yeah, I honestly don't know where we went. Uh, and we drank the whole night and then we went to a bunch of bars and then, then, uh, the, uh, there was the next night we came back to Ybor and. Hey, we went to some rock club and that's where we seen sunshine and bullets and all that. It was, it was fun. I'm constipated. There's those, there's those fun weeks that just, uh, you almost don't want to end. Yeah. Well, well, I was, I was happy it ended because.
Speaker: A. Ron and I, we drank a lot. And Tampa, Florida learned that when I drink, when I go live, that it's not staged. I really do drink a lot. And they learned that drinking with Glick is a very dangerous idea. I'm not really going to run away with Matty B. We just love each other.
Speaker: We just love each other. We have Guy Love for each other. If you've ever watched Scrubs, you know what Guy Love is. I needed a week off from work.
Speaker: to recover from my vacation because I got to Tampa. As soon as I got there, we started drinking. The first night we drank until six, seven o 'clock in the morning and A. A. Ron and I ordered breakfast from Uber East from McDonald's, slept for like two hours, got up, went and got something to eat. And we're like, Oh, we can start drinking. It's nine o 'clock, 10 o 'clock in the morning. And we started drinking and we drank all day and night.
Speaker: And I was just every fucking day. And I'm like, I did my thirties. I'm not in my twenties anymore. I shouldn't be drinking. You shouldn't be drinking as much. I haven't drank like this in a long time. No, the times like that, when you drink so much that your liver calls you in the morning, goes, what the fuck? Those are the those are the weeks that are hell.
Speaker: I chicks chicks before prick. What the hell? Someone just found a new store. It's called chicks before pricks. Nice. I look so young. That's a goddamn lie, Holland. You better stop it with your shit. Summer's summer's summer's like twenty seven. I'll be 40 in October. Summer's nine, nine, ten years younger than I am. So.
Speaker: chicks before pricks. So what do they sell? Like a bunch of. Chicken clothes. Yeah, I'm confused. I really wish you could. Kevin and I are 46. Yeah, Kevin's an old fuck. Yeah, I. That just makes it sound old. You know, Kevin, Kevin's old. He's also he's also little. I am. I have this I have this weird fascination with making little people, little people. Yeah.
Speaker: Well, Stan's little, when I first got down there to Tampa and Stan A. A. Ron and Stan's now ex -wife.
Speaker: They were waiting on me at A -Ron's house and they had beers. Stan's got like two cases of Budweiser. Ready to go. Yeah, she's got two cases of Bud Light. They're like, we don't know if we have enough beer. And I'm like, you probably don't. But I get out of the car. I get out of the car and Stan's first words are, Jesus Christ, Glick, you're a big motherfucker. A -Ron, he's not a little guy, but he was still smaller than me. He was like,
Speaker: Yeah, we didn't realize how big you were from Periscope. Well, yeah, the camera, you can literally make yourself look giant or you can make yourself look really small. Yeah. So I was just like, and I'm not that big. It's not like I'm not big. I'm, you know, I'm six two on a good day. Get that kid with the stunner. No, she wants the fan because they're going to. There you go.
Speaker: Yeah. Oh, and you're young. He's old. Summer's all right. Yeah. Hey, Kevin. All right. Hey, Jeff. Hey, Jeff. Yeah. I'm going to give you like I'm going to give you like a minute and a half to talk about the Fast and the Furious. Why you got to pee? I got to pay. I actually saw the new one. I was not impressed. It was terrible. It was a big piece of shit. I was not impressed with Fast and Furious 9. I.
Speaker: Uh, it probably didn't help that I watched it online, but it was not good. I, I was not impressed. I literally fast forwarded through parts because it was so bad. I just wanted to get to the end because they teased in the trailer that about Brian coming back and literally basically what you saw in the trailer was what you saw in the actual movie. So I was like, but I was not impressed.
Speaker: Sunday? Yes. No, next Sunday.
Speaker: Well, it is about that two hour mark. I do have to get going. My wife is home and I can hear her yelling at the kids. So I got to go help her with that. Your time's up. No, I am. I was going to say, it was a good thing that, um, we didn't do the podcast last night. Cause I'd have been doing it, uh, from the bathroom. Kevin in Santa Barbara six, six five. Am I about six five with my boots on this summer? There you go. Yeah.
Speaker: I'm not a little guy. I mean, Jeff knows me personally. Jeff and I have been doing it for almost 25 years. Yeah, something like that. But yeah, let's go ahead and wrap up because I've heard my wife yell my name three times.
Speaker: I sleep in the car tonight. Yeah, it'd be all right. Go. Go. Good. Good. Tell your drunk neighbor. I didn't. I didn't crash on the couch. Jeff, send me a friend request. Hollins has sent her friend request. Will do. Damn girl. I actually like a lot of comments that are coming through on on. What the fuck is this app that we're on? Haps. Yeah. Oh.
Speaker: Yeah, they're coming through on half, but they're not coming through on Facebook. So yeah, we'll go ahead and wrap this up. We'll be back. Uh, we'll be back Saturday night, hopefully roughly around seven or so same, same bat channel, same bat time. So I was thinking the same thing. Yeah, we'll be back Saturday night, do another, uh, rendition of this, uh,
Speaker: trailer park dumpster fire. Holland, download the HAPS app, set you up a HAPS profile. Maybe you and Summer can join us. It takes all five minutes. Yeah. Maybe you and Summer can join us for a little bit. Yeah. But thank you guys for listening. This is another episode of Nance in school now. We're trying to think of a cheesy ass way to end this. I know.
Speaker: Yeah, but we appreciate you guys for listening. Thank you guys that listened live and was in the chat room as always. Make sure you follow us on social media or you don't have to follow us, but if you'd like to, that'd be fantastic. On Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, TikTok, all under Nonsense School Nonsense. And the email and Nonsense School Nonsense podcast at Gmail. Yeah, well, you got that right off the bat. This is the first time you've actually nailed that. Yeah. Most importantly,
Speaker: because I can't do it like I did before because then we. I know it's coming. Hour and a half.
Speaker: check us out on Spotify. You can get every single episode of this. You can catch up, listen to it, and then you can tell us we suck and buy an email. Thank you guys for listening. We'll see y 'all Saturday. And we are out of here. Gotta push this button and maybe it'll end. I can never figure out how to do this. And there we go.
Speaker: Then I let you go alone It's times like these I can't make it on my own Wasting days and sleeveless nights And I can't wait to see you again I finally spent my time waiting on your call
Speaker: I need you by my side to tell me it's alright Cause I don't think I can take anymore Is this love that I'm feeling? Is this the love that I've been searching for? Is this love or am I dreaming?
Speaker: Cause it's really gotta work
Speaker: I can feel my love for you going stronger day by day And I can't wait to see you again So I can hold you in my arms Is this love that I'm feeling? Is this a love that I've been searching for? Is this love
Speaker: Or am I dreaming this must be love?
Speaker: Is this love that I'm feeling? Is this a love that I've been searching for? Is this love or am I dreaming this must be love? Cause it's really gotta be love
