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S1 E11 Find Yourself, Find Your Health - With Laura Aura
83 Plays2 years ago
Health and nutrition are much more than eat this not that… When we put so much pressure on the BEHAVIOR without UNDERSTANDING the WHY behind it, it can feel like we are continuing to just be our own worst enemy on the hamster wheel of struggles with body and health.
Laura Aura, alignment coach, host of the very popular podcast: The Gusty Podcast, and CEO of Worx and Co was extremely thought-provoking and a huge delight to chat with as we dove into highly relatable topics in the realm of improving your health by FIRST identifying belief systems that are compromising your health, SHIFTING your patterns, AND how to start doing that.
These tools translate into much more than just nutrition but are extremely helpful as one continues their journey discovering their own knowing of what being true to them ACTUALLY looks like outside of all the should and pressures we get wired to believe throughout our whole life.
Listen in to discover ways you can find yourself more because by doing that, you’ll get closer to finding your truest health.
https://lauraaura.com/
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to Health and Belief Systems
00:00:00
Speaker
This week's episode got me super excited to share with y'all this episode covered highly relatable topics for me in the realm of improving your health by first shifting your own belief systems that are compromising your health and how to start doing that. These tools translate into so much more than just nutrition.
00:00:23
Speaker
but are extremely helpful as one continues their journey, discovering their own knowing of what being true to themselves actually looks like outside of all the shoulds and pressures we get wired to believe throughout our whole life. Get ready to find yourself more because by doing that, you'll get closer to finding your health. Here's our guest.
00:00:48
Speaker
Hello and welcome to Eating Between the Lines. I am your host, Therese Martinez, and I am so happy to have you here. If you want to untangle yourself from diet culture conditioning and get appropriate actual options to nourish your unique life and body, I'm going to dive deep into the nuanced spectrum of health to help you figure out what to prioritize in your journey
00:01:12
Speaker
without getting trapped in the extreme ideology of health optimization or total complacency. I am here to help you apply the science effectively, not rigidly, and get you feeling better in your body and mind. Here is how to eat between the lines.
00:01:33
Speaker
Hello, hello, welcome back everyone.
Meet Laura Ora: Alignment Coach
00:01:36
Speaker
Very excited today. We have got Laura Ora on. She is an alignment coach for female entrepreneurs and women who are craving more in life. She guides people to personal alignment by learning how to honor their energy and truly listen to what they want instead of what they've been taught they should.
00:01:58
Speaker
Laura is the CEO of Works & Co., an urban branding studio, the host of a top 100 podcast, The Gutsy Podcast, speaker, author, and all-around visionary. The Gutsy Podcast, which is amazing, please go check it out, I love it, has over 60,000 downloads in 115 countries,
00:02:19
Speaker
Each week, Laura empowers women in business and in transition by humanizing feelings, encouraging individualism and unraveling the shoulds that keep so many people stuck for decades.
00:02:31
Speaker
She'll be the first person to push you out of your comfort zone and the last to hug you as you head to the next level of your life. Her energy is contagious, an aura. And if you're up for the challenge, she might just trick you into believing in yourself. Laura, it is so wonderful to connect with you. How are you today?
Journey to Authenticity and Empowerment
00:02:50
Speaker
I am fabulous. Thanks so much for having me. Yeah. So.
00:02:56
Speaker
um gosh we connected a few weeks ago at this point and truly I mean even just like
00:03:05
Speaker
I read a lot of bios, right? And just the, the energetics that you bring to a conversation even virtually like is amazing. I remember jumping on that, like that call that we were just like, it's going to connect to see if we wanted to even chat more and you really do bring such a lightness and welcoming energy in. It's just, I just want to validate that part of your bio because it is so true. And so I've been really looking forward to this because it just, I
00:03:34
Speaker
I don't know. It just sounds really fun to dive in. I feel like we're very aligned with a lot of
00:03:40
Speaker
curiosities around the topics that you, you know, you work with day in, day out. So that is, that made my whole day. Thank you very much for saying that. I appreciate it. It's, you know, it's been a, it's been a journey to really, truly discover who I am and allow the fullness of myself to be who I am, not just in my personal life, but in my business.
00:04:07
Speaker
And have found that spoiler alert, the secret sauce is giving yourself permission to be who you are. That's truly where the happiness, the joy, the success, the growth that you're really looking for. I mean, it's foundational to that. So thank you very much for those beautiful kind words. I accept that. Good. Oh, so true. Let's, let's kind of actually master segue into that. Let's go into a little bit of your story. First, I, you know, I kind of want to hear about.
00:04:37
Speaker
Um, we're at currently with, with who you help and sort of passions that you are all about right now. And then bring us like, take us back into how you got there. Yeah. So my, my primary focus and what lights me up the most right now is helping women in business.
00:04:58
Speaker
to get back into alignment, not just personally, but in their business. And that means nothing more than rediscovering who they are, what they want, how they actually want to do the thing, and then giving themselves permission to do it. It sounds simple, but it's not always easy, right? And really, you know, after working with, gosh, I think thousands of people at this point,
00:05:20
Speaker
Uh, it's not the the tactics. It's not the strategies always. It's not all the moving pieces that stops people. It's not always even time or money to be honest with you. It's what's happening in between your ears on a regular basis. It's the conversations that you're having with yourself. It's the beliefs that you continue to lean into. It's the habits that you continue to turn to and it just like
00:05:43
Speaker
Blows my mind and lights me up all at the same time to really see these incredible women in this space To help shift them and like it's like a wake-up, right? Like it's like waking up again and getting reconnected So that is a thousand percent where my passion is and of course in hosting the gutsy podcast It's it's part of my soul, right? It's just part of my calling. So
00:06:06
Speaker
So that's where I currently am. I'll give you the cliff notes back version. So I've been an entrepreneur and business owner for 15 years, almost 16 now at this point. Um, I started my branding agency when I was six and a half months pregnant with my son. I quit my full-time job. Um, I'll date myself for a second. I, my job was designing ads for the yellow book, which was the phone book. So the yellow pages in the back, I designed the ads in the back of that. So
00:06:32
Speaker
You know, it was through that experience though that I learned what I loved and what I didn't love. Um, and what I was really missing was the connection with people. And so I started my business and started branding people and businesses.
Entrepreneurship Beginnings and Podcasting
00:06:45
Speaker
And through that process, I really found this natural interest in people's thoughts and feelings and mind and like,
00:06:54
Speaker
the fears that were popping up and the why they were holding back. And I was just like, Oh, this is really interesting. Cause I was also going through that same stuff myself, right? Like owning a business is such a weird road. It's one day you're on top of the world and the next day you suck. And like, then you see something, then you're inspired. And then the next day you've talked to yourself out of everything. And it's just this really weird windy, tourney road. Yeah.
00:07:19
Speaker
I don't care what a million people tell you on Instagram, there are moments and seasons of this, right? It's not always just like perfection and these incredible launches overnight.
00:07:31
Speaker
And so I, I leaned into, I've always been very good about leaning into the things that I find interesting and kind of light me up. And so I started interviewing entrepreneurs on the green couch, which is in my background right now. Um, but it was called the green couch project and it was a whole production lights and cameras and you know,
00:07:50
Speaker
I love, love, love that. Cause I got to have just very candid, raw conversations with the business owner, not about branding, but about them and their mind.
00:08:03
Speaker
And I wanted to do more of it, but the production costs of that was pretty substantial. So I thought, okay, well, how can I do more of this? And it costs less money to do it. Now I'll figure out how to launch a podcast. Sure. I, you know, I'm always just one of those people where I'm like, I'll figure it out. You know, like, I don't know how to do it, but I'll figure it out.
00:08:21
Speaker
So four and a half years ago, I launched the gutsy podcast. And as you mentioned, now it's in the top 100 on our entrepreneur show, which I'm very proud of. And, um, that has led me to, to coaching and to hosting the show and just having these conversations because before you're a business owner, you're a human. And as a human, you have thoughts and feelings and desires and ideas and expectations and all of this stuff that come, you know, greets who you are. If we don't work on shift and strengthen that.
00:08:50
Speaker
that shit continues to show up in your business totally so we always want to go to like how do we fix the business well i'm more like let's actually maybe go inward you don't you don't need fixed right we just maybe need to bring some awareness some consciousness um and shift some things so that you are more aligned with yourself so
00:09:10
Speaker
Yeah, that's the long short version.
Focus on Entrepreneurial Alignment
00:09:12
Speaker
Oh, yeah, that's great. Do you? OK, so a couple of questions here. I have a little bit better of an idea of why you then like like to work with entrepreneurs. It sounds like that is just such a rich part of your background. What is it that like you feel? Is there something unique about entrepreneurs that you find this work to be most more beneficial for and kind of why?
00:09:38
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I think probably just naturally because it's, it's just been such a huge part of my life, right? And I felt so isolated and sometimes still, right? Like entrepreneurship can be a very isolating role as well. And you sit and you're thinking by yourself and you're doing by yourself and you're trying to figure things out by yourself.
00:09:59
Speaker
And I've just always had a soft spot for making sure that people feel seen and heard and included. And so I think just between my background of owning and operating and running and growing a business and knowing what I was experiencing as my own human self. It's just always been a natural thing because you know, entrepreneurship is so fascinating because as challenging as it can be.
00:10:21
Speaker
It's also incredibly rewarding. Like you can truly create the life that you want. You can, you have control over your finances. You can choose how you work, when you work, where you work, right? Like it just gives you so much flexibility. And I think that it's important to empower the people that have that
00:10:39
Speaker
itch inside of them or that natural, I don't know if it's a gene or if it's something that kind of comes across you or something you're born with, but to know that they're not alone and that there is support and that you can do this because otherwise you're sitting there by yourself and you talk yourself out of stuff and it gets really complicated. So I think it's just a combination of a lot of things that I've just always felt, you know, intrigued by and also passionate to support in.
00:11:08
Speaker
Yeah, totally. One of the reasons I wanted to chat with you was because of this idea around alignment and helping people become more aligned. I find that there are a lot of parallels with that kind of idea seen in realms of diet culture and honestly,
00:11:34
Speaker
Oh just considerations around the toxicity of the gas that is bombardment around shoulds and shouldn'ts of bodies and and then also wellness culture too they're kind of one in the same as well but um
00:11:50
Speaker
What do you think like, first of all, how do you define alignment?
Understanding and Practicing Alignment
00:11:56
Speaker
Like what is it even, how would you even describe what being aligned is? Like a pre-unaligned, a post-aligned, and is it like in different areas of your life? What does this look like? How do you go about like even just grasping the definition?
00:12:13
Speaker
Yeah, alignment is kind of funny because if you're not super aware or even have been introduced yet to this concept, you may not even know that you're in or out of alignment. It just might be a regular feeling that you have. So in the most basic of terms, alignment is nothing more than being, doing, and choosing from your own space as yourself.
00:12:40
Speaker
It's giving yourself permission and allowing yourself to do what you wanna do, to go where you wanna go, to create what you wanna create, to say yes to yourself, to put yourself forward, to do things that bring you joy. It's literally taking care of your human self. And what ends up happening is we get caught in these buckets of, and you even just mentioned it, shoulds, right? This is how I should do things. Now I have roles and responsibilities. Now I have time expectations. There's all these like things that pull you
00:13:08
Speaker
out of your own center. Alignment is amazing because once you taste it, it's like you don't want anything other than it because in alignment, decisions become easier. Saying yes or no becomes easier. There's just an ease and a peace in your life and in your soul. Like it's where you're able to really control your thoughts and
00:13:31
Speaker
navigate your feelings and choose because you want to, instead of giving away, unintentionally giving away parts of yourself to other people. So for instance, like in a business, like, Oh, I can open my phone right now and see, you know, 30 people that own a business and 30 different ways to do something.
00:13:54
Speaker
Well, out of alignment, I might look at their information and say, well, that's working for them. So it must work for me. Now I'm going to do that. And this person says to post on Instagram this many times a day. So I should do that. And I'm going to do that. And then this person says that I should change the way that I talk. So I'm going to do that.
00:14:11
Speaker
That's what I mean by unintentionally giving away parts of yourself. That is out of alignment because it's not choosing from your space. It's choosing from their space. Whereas when you're in alignment, you can see all those things. Maybe you take some inspiration from it. That's interesting. Although there might be a piece of that that I can create my own thing.
00:14:30
Speaker
But I see that they're telling me that I have to post this many times a day, but you know what? I know that I don't need to because I know how my audience works and I know how I work the best. So I'm glad that's working for them, but I'm going to keep doing it the way that I'm doing it because it's working, right? Like that's what I mean by getting into alignment and choosing from yourself. It's like this very grounded, natural state. It's literally the natural state of who you are before the world told you what you should be.
00:14:56
Speaker
Yeah. And so it's, there's just this ease and a flow and a simplicity. Simplicity is such a huge thing in alignment. A lot misalignment is just like herding cats. Everything's everywhere. And at the end of the day, you're going, I did a bunch of shit. I have no idea what I did today. I don't feel fulfilled. And tomorrow I got to do it all over again.
00:15:15
Speaker
just chaos. And, uh, yeah, I see this so much in, uh, like so much in the nutrition and fitness realm, honestly, because there's always the, like the one uppers of like, this is the best way. This is the only way. This is like how you need to approach this, this, and that. I mean, I even see it with like my own self and like,
00:15:37
Speaker
I don't know what I wear. And like, you know, like, well, if I'm going to wear makeup, am I doing this for myself or am I, is this because of like how I've just been influenced my whole life of what I should and shouldn't do? And it gets extremely confusing. And I know like, as you're describing the feeling of being aligned, it's like, I know that I have felt that. And I know that it like, like, so probably everybody at some point has like had a glimpse of it at least in their life with some decision that they've made. Um,
00:16:06
Speaker
how did one kind of practice and understand steps to get to that place? Like the curiosity for me with like, is this me? Is this not me? Is this what it like, is this what I'm groomed to be? Like what is it actually and how do I practice getting there? Is it trial and error? Is it observation of responsive emotions? Like what is it?
00:16:32
Speaker
It's a lot of things, but I think one of the most simplistic ways and places to start is a very important question that we don't ask ourselves. And that is, what do I want? We skip over that.
00:16:47
Speaker
We're on to the next thing. There's a million things going on. We're easily influenced and we don't pause. There is so much power in the pause when we give ourselves a chance to just sit for a hot second.
00:17:03
Speaker
observe things, notice, right? Awareness is such a huge part of this is like, how do I even feel right now? So if we're talking about, let's talk about, you know, choosing what to wear. You just mentioned that example. And one of the things that comes to my mind first with what to wear is, you know, we're going into the summertime at this point.
00:17:26
Speaker
And there's dresses and you know just the things that we're wearing and stuff. And what are we taught as a society as women? Make sure everything is smooth. There's no bumps, there's no lumps, there's no pouches. Put on this garment that literally sucks your organs in so that we can create this perfect shape so that everyone else feels more comfortable. Okay, give me the soapbox for a hot second because
00:17:53
Speaker
That's the kind of bullshit that I get real wound up about. That is a should. That is misalignment because that is what someone else is telling you to do. So in this scenario, we're getting dressed, right? It's the morning we're going out to spend a day with friends. We're putting on the dress. We start to see the lumps and the bumps. We're human beings. We have organs. Our bodies have shapes, right? So in that moment, the should, the misaligned part of you is like,
00:18:19
Speaker
I should put on the slimming thing, right? I need to tuck this in. I need to put this cleavage away. I need to do all these things. Pause. Take a really nice big deep breath. What do I want? How do I want to feel right now? Can I give myself the grace that this is the body that I'm in right now and that I can love it for what it is because it helps me navigate this entire world?
00:18:45
Speaker
What if I chose for myself today? Maybe I don't like wearing those slimming things because it's uncomfortable and it's hot and it's sweaty and it makes me feel gross and they roll down and they're uncomfortable. So today, instead, I'm going to choose, I'm going to choose for my line self and I'm going to say, I'm just going to wear the dress and I'm not going to worry about all that other stuff because I'm not here to make everyone else happy and comfortable.
00:19:09
Speaker
I'm here to help make myself happy and comfortable. And so now I'm choosing from an aligned space and then you go out and you feel good. And you know, honestly, I also want to say that sometimes it's uncomfortable at first, right? When you're choosing to do something for yourself and you haven't done it in a long while, right? I can remember some of the first, like I went to the store the other day with no bra on.
00:19:29
Speaker
There were a couple of years ago, I would have been like hiding myself and talking and all this stuff. And I'm like, this is literally the body that I have. We all have bodies. Why am I like shaming my body?
00:19:43
Speaker
So it takes a little while to like undo the stuff that you've been programmed to do and be, but that's where the confidence comes into place. That's where it becomes easier to make these decisions. So after you decide from an aligned space enough times, it becomes second nature and it becomes, it's no longer something you have to think about or work on. It just becomes your norm. Yeah.
00:20:08
Speaker
The whole concept of trying to appease others and not make them uncomfortable is I think just a really, it's just very challenging for people. I was just talking to another girl actually that was on and she was talking about this as well, where it's like, we're just not like women especially,
00:20:34
Speaker
you know, and I don't mean to be sexist by any means, I'm sure that there are many men that can relate to, but there is a tendency for women to just not have the history of standing up and like, and actually going against the grain because they are just so groomed to please others. And I imagine in the entrepreneurial space as well, like it's definitely seen
00:20:59
Speaker
in ways that are like not just like body, right? But in just like time given and all of that. And I just, it is a concept that I just, I want to emanate and understand far more of my own self and just get to know my own self more and then help clients really understand what that looks like for them too. Because oh my word, what a relief, what a relief.
Insights on Obsessive Thoughts and Freedom
00:21:24
Speaker
I remember talking to a therapist, one of my many of like, oh, years ago,
00:21:29
Speaker
And, you know, I battled an end disorder for a long time and I'm still just kind of like lots of thoughts, lots of thoughts around food and body. And she just like planted the seed of like, what would it be like to not think about those things?
00:21:47
Speaker
And it was just like, the visual of what happened in my brain was just like clearance. And then the physical feeling of weight off my shoulders. And then I was like, wait.
00:22:02
Speaker
How am I going to feel that like, what do I do? Oh my gosh. I can think about so many other things. Where else can my mind go? What else can I do in this world? Who else can I serve? What can I do for myself? And it's like a whole time, all the amount of time people spend.
00:22:20
Speaker
thinking about like appeasing others, pleasing others, not letting others feel uncomfortable in sacrifice for their own wellbeing and mental health, I think is wild. I think it's still helpful to be considerate, you know, but it's like, yeah, I mean, putting yourself first doesn't mean that you're just like being a jerk to other people. I think that, I think people think that it's like a black and white.
00:22:42
Speaker
You either think of other people first or you think of yourself first. And then, you know, we could also go down the rabbit hole. Oh, you put yourself first. That's selfish. And how dare you? And you need to do this. And it's, it's, it's the same rabbit hole, but in a different direction, right? And so it's not a black and white. In fact, I would, I would fight in the streets to say that taking care of yourself actually gives you the opportunity to be so much better for the people that you care for.
00:23:07
Speaker
that you can show up more. You can be more present. You're healthier. You're happier. There's more joy, you know, with, when you're with your spouse or your kids or your friends or your family, your coworkers, your, your employees, whoever it is that is around you, um, gets to benefit from your joy and your alignment as well. Because when you're fulfilled, you have, I mean,
00:23:30
Speaker
You hear it all the time. You can't pour from an empty cup and it's really true, but we're constantly just like, you know, trying to siphon out this like empty cup that we're like, well, if we just melt the plastic, then we'll have more liquid to get. But it doesn't have to be that way. But that comes down to a decision.
00:23:48
Speaker
You know, we, we can continue to go down this path. We can continue to do the things that we're doing right now, or we can decide to change things. That's the uncomfortable spot. That's where people have resistance. I say this on TikTok a lot and it always gets people will real wound up. And I always say the thing that you want the most is often behind the thing that you resist the most.
00:24:11
Speaker
And so we're saying, you know, I want more time. I need more time. I don't have any time, but now we're packing our schedules and saying yes and over-committing.
00:24:19
Speaker
We're resisting the thing that we want. And that's a really big piece when we, when we think about alignment is recognizing where you resist things, recognizing your tendencies. What do you tend to do when things get hard or overwhelming or complicated or even exciting sometimes, right? Like there's all these like moving pieces.
00:24:40
Speaker
to help like rediscover what do you actually want? Yeah. And how can we create new, healthier habits and belief systems that support that instead? Otherwise we're in a hamster wheel. Totally. Might get off of the hamster wheel, but inevitably we jump back on the hamster wheel and then we get off and we get back on. And so it's really just about breaking the pattern and creating a new one. Mm-hmm.
00:25:07
Speaker
I've been thinking about hamster wheels a lot lately with my own life. And, and so much of what you said like said and even like initially just describing entrepreneurs earlier on it was like, yep, yep, yep, I like so relate to so much of this.
00:25:24
Speaker
what does it look like to dive in? I imagine your process entails more than a 30-minute discussion here, but what are some tools that
00:25:39
Speaker
I think it's outside looking in. Oh, alignment sounds great. Okay, yeah, that mindset sounds great. What is it that like, what do you do to get there? How do you dive in? What are some of like maybe like the practices or things that you apply in your own business to help people kind of in a more concrete fashion? Because I think otherwise there is a lot of skepticism to that like,
00:26:06
Speaker
to the ability, right? Um, not that a person has to know the how for everything. I think that's part of it too, right? But, um, but there is curiosity around like what it even means. Yeah. Well, you know, it's also one of those things where I think mindset gets thrown around and gets real like,
00:26:26
Speaker
oh in the wind and if we just stand still and okay listen we can feel things all day long but if we don't take action to support it we're we're just standing in the wind and we're gonna keep doing that so
00:26:42
Speaker
We teach what we most need to learn. A mentor told me that one time. And sometimes I'm like, damn, that's so true. So I developed a process and by doing it myself, because I'm like, my mindset goes all over the place. And I also want to say that this is not about achieving perfection. It's not about getting to a level and then like never having to deal with it again, because new experiences come up, new beliefs form, new things happen.
The Power Back Process (AURA)
00:27:08
Speaker
And so this tool
00:27:10
Speaker
can be applied in any point of your journey to get back into alignment. So it's called the power back process. And it's an acronym, A-U-R-A, Aura.
00:27:22
Speaker
Yes, punfully intended. It's designed to help you get back into your energy, which gets you back into alignment. So when your thoughts start going on a hundred miles an hour, when you start getting overwhelmed, when you start overthinking, when you start, when you get stuck, when you go into freeze mode, like whatever is happening, what you would typically do, right? We talked about tendencies, whatever you would typically do.
00:27:45
Speaker
you can implement this and so instead of going off the rails and this thought or feeling controlling you for the rest of the day the week the month years you can literally take your power back in the moment or shortly thereafter and get back into alignment and move forward so i'll walk you through it
00:28:02
Speaker
First one is a awareness. So I'm just going to stick with our example from earlier with the getting dressed because it's relevant, I think to everybody. So a awareness, I'm getting dressed. I am putting on something and my brain starts going. I'm too fat. This doesn't look good. I don't even know if I like this color, you know, so-and-so has a dress like this. What if they wear it? I don't want to wear it too. Like write the chatter, pop, pop, pop, pop, or just talking to ourselves.
00:28:31
Speaker
awareness, literally just building awareness. Okay, I am saying a whole bunch of shit to myself right now. Got it. I see it. I understand it. I'm recognizing it. If you skip that part,
00:28:44
Speaker
The rest is irrelevant. Because if you don't have awareness around what you're thinking or you're feeling, the hamster wheel you shall continue to run in. So, okay, I am saying that stuff to myself again. Got it. The next step is you. Unpack it. This is a place without judgment. It's a place of curiosity. It's a place of fluidity. I wonder why I am saying that to myself right now. Huh, that's kind of strange. Where did that come from? Because 10 minutes ago I felt pretty good.
00:29:14
Speaker
Oh, I saw that post on Instagram and that other person looked really good. Or I saw somebody outside and, and their hair, I felt like their hair looked better than mine. Or I thought about something that, you know, a friend said to me once that I can't quite get out of my head. I can't shake it off. Got it. Okay. I'm seeing kind of where this is coming from. The R is to reframe it. What is real and what is true.
00:29:38
Speaker
You know what, I bought this dress because I really liked it. This color is pretty awesome. I know I don't wear it very often, but you know, I'm trying to try some new things. Like I really feel curious to wear this. I feel kind of excited. I don't need to shape wear anything.
00:29:53
Speaker
If Sally Jo wears it too, then cool, we'll take twin pictures and post it online, right? It's okay. I bought this dress because I'm ready to try some new things and I want to. And then A is aligned action. So now you've taken this really big, gnarly thing, you've brought it back in, regrounded, and now we're choosing from our aligned space.
00:30:18
Speaker
I'm going to wear the dress, period. Leave the house and go do the thing. And so instead of these thoughts and feelings, now you're changing into five different outfits and things are thrown across the room and now I wanna cut off all my hair because my hair looks stupid now too, right? Instead of going down that rabbit hole, we have taken a hold of that thought process, re-grounded it, re-centered, re-aligned, and moved forward with what you actually wanted, which was to wear the dress.
00:30:47
Speaker
and I promise you, I promise you, if you implement this, if you do this, you catch those thoughts, you catch the feeling, you start to implement this process, you will change everything, literally everything. My husband uses it, my son uses it, my family, like,
00:31:05
Speaker
People use it because it is simple. You don't need to go buy anything. You don't need to go log into anywhere. This is, you can literally do this silently sitting at a dinner table. You can do this in a meeting. You can do this in an interview. You can do this in front of the mirror. You can do this anywhere and it helps to reroute what you would typically do and get you back into alignment so that you can move forward from that space.
00:31:30
Speaker
I love it. I love it. Um, so how do you get more mindful? Cause it's like, that's the starting point, right? Cause it's like, okay, that makes sense. I've, um, I see a lot of, I did a lot of dialectic behavioral therapy in years of past. Have you heard of DBT very much? Okay.
00:31:50
Speaker
Yeah, so that's interesting because I see parallels with what you're talking about. They have four different modules, one's mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotional regulation, and the fourth one, I forget, interpersonal effectiveness.
00:32:06
Speaker
So anyways, they have like certain skills in, um, that you apply in certain, it was originally created for folks with bipolar disorder, but had been applied for folks with eating disorders. But I've gone through it a few times and I'm like, I use this with my clients that like have no, but not eating disorder wise. But like, I like, I talked to my friends about it, right? Because because of the really, the valuable skills that there can be, but in any case, it's like.
00:32:31
Speaker
You create that mindfulness to intercept the thought, right? So, but that's the hardest part, I think, for people to even start because it's so habituated, right? It's so natural. It's so like sometimes scrolling through social media, you don't even realize
00:32:51
Speaker
what is coming into your mind, what seeds you're watering, um, where like, you know, you go out to go put a dress on and you're like, like what you just said, you have the reaction, but how do you even tie it back to that social media scrolling? And so like, so eventually if you do get to the point of that mindfulness, then they have a skill, um,
00:33:12
Speaker
that's called check the facts. And so then like, you know where your mind's going, you check the facts of your actual like, what you're thinking, are they true? Is this, how do I know this to be true? Do I know people will judge me? Do I know if I care, right? Like, does it matter? Like those kinds of things. And then radical acceptance is like another part of it where it's like,
00:33:38
Speaker
I don't know. I will never know. And this is what I want to do. Right. And so like the hardest part I think is that initial interception because of the wiring for us all the time. Right. How do you start with helping people become just more aware of their own thoughts? Yeah. You know, most people are walking around on autopilot.
00:34:05
Speaker
You've got a routine, you've got responsibilities, you've got timelines, you've got deadlines, you got all this stuff going on. And so this is, this is the work, you know, it's not, there's no, no special pill to take. There's, you know, isn't a five step hack that's going to change this overnight. You're literally rewiring your brain.
00:34:23
Speaker
And so, you know, the subconscious, we operate out of our subconscious mind 95 to 97% of the time, which means the back of your brain, the thoughts, beliefs, and systems that you have formed from a child upwards. That's what's running the show. And what we're trying to do now with this process is use that three to 5% of the conscious mind to get aware of all that other gunk that's happening in the background.
00:34:48
Speaker
And so it's, you know, our subconscious mind is like a dirt road. I like to use this analogy. I'm a visual person. Yeah. You know, that dirt road that's been in that hometown for like 150 years, every car, truck, bus, and vehicle has gone down it. The grooves in the dirt are literally so deep that when you turn left to go down the road,
00:35:10
Speaker
your car literally just automatically clicks into place, right? And that's the path that you go. And that's what's happening on a regular basis. Always your decisions, your beliefs, how you show up, what you're doing, that's what you're doing. You're turning your car into that groove.
00:35:26
Speaker
And so this process, this getting radically aware, this getting mindful, this waking up is when you turn onto the dirt road instead of clicking the place. Now we are turning a little bit more, right. We're creating a new groove.
00:35:41
Speaker
So you're creating a new pattern and that takes time. I want everyone to know that like this takes time. Don't get, don't get pissed off at yourself or like beat yourself up or start going down the shame game spiral by saying like, Oh, I did good yesterday about today. I suck.
00:35:57
Speaker
Today, the mindfulness piece is to slow down and people don't like that. People don't want to slow down. You want to keep running at the races. You want to keep doing what you're doing. So fun little exercise carry around a post-it note with you for one day. And every time you say the word should put a little tick mark.
00:36:18
Speaker
You wanna start to build some mindfulness? That'll get you real aware of your words very quickly. And it's so like a little tiny activity just to become aware of what you're saying. Another activity is once an hour, every hour, sit and write down everything that you said to yourself. If you wanna go up even further a step, carry around a notebook with you and every time you say something crappy or make a decision based off of something that you should, write it down.
00:36:49
Speaker
just simply be aware of it. Again, we're not, it's not about smacking you on the back of the hand when it's not about being like, look how terrible I am. No, we're not doing all that. We, you have to build awareness, right? Like you are literally creating a new groove in your brain. And when you start to do that, then you start to catch yourself a little bit sooner. You know, if you do the, the should exercise, which I recommend everybody doing,
00:37:13
Speaker
carry that around with you for the day. And every time you write that tick mark and it adds up and you're like, holy cow, I had no idea. And that is the whole point is to build awareness around the things that you're on autopilot for. It's a wake up call, right? And then tomorrow,
00:37:33
Speaker
When you go to talk, you're going to catch it. You're going to be like, Oh, there it is. Right. And that in turn starts a new process that starts to bring, you know, it's like light bulbs start to go off. And then you can start to implement that power back process when some of those things happen. And it's like, all of a sudden now I'm kind of like leaning into something new.
00:37:55
Speaker
This is new territory. I've not done this before and it feels different, but it's getting me better results and I'm feeling better and I'm more intrigued and I'm going deeper with myself. And this, this might be the thing that leads me to what I'm actually trying to do. Hmm. I like that. I'm thinking about all the sheds of clients and people probably listening, even in the realm of like.
00:38:22
Speaker
food and nutrition and health, like a lot, just having the connection of frequency of the, oh gosh, like, I don't know, just the, um, external direction, you know, like, like I'm picturing like almost like a puppet, right? Where like they're, they're kind of being played by someone else of like the shoulds and shouldn'ts in those types of directions. But like the awareness that that would create when like,
00:38:48
Speaker
God, think about how, like how much that chips away at your own knowing and your own, like what kind of feels more and again, like aligned for you, but also just the guilt and shame cycle when you should on yourself so often. And so I love that. It reminds me, I think it was like Kevin Hart or someone did this experiment when they were like, they had said like to try to not complain for like,
00:39:17
Speaker
a week or something it was like not just even a day but it was like a week and I think the day was even super hard but you know that kind of talk I did a challenge with myself with um money a while ago where it was like try not to make a comment around
00:39:35
Speaker
the cost of anything, right? And once I started creating more awareness, I just started realizing how many other people would comment about, oh gosh, it's so expensive. Oh well, the here are the times, you know, like all this stuff. And it's like, ooh, that's an energy that I don't really love. And I also don't, yeah. And that I would like notice, it's like, man, that was me for so long, still to a certain degree, right? Like still working, but
00:40:02
Speaker
And having that awareness, I think is just so dang powerful with that mindfulness and reiteration. So I love that exercise. That's a, yeah, that's, that's good. Yeah. It's a fun way to realize very quickly what you're saying and don't even realize what you're saying, what you're thinking and don't even realize what you're thinking. And like I said, it's, it's like a really cool little snowball.
00:40:26
Speaker
That's a little tiny thing. And then it grows, you know, if you're willing to lean into it, right? Again, it's not about doing this exercise. And then now all of a sudden tomorrow I'm like magically healed from it. It opens a door for you to walk through with curiosity. Yeah. It opens a door that maybe has not been opened yet.
00:40:50
Speaker
and takes you on a journey of like this reconnecting with yourself. And then it's through that type of process where you discover what alignment is for you because your alignment probably looks very different than mine. My alignment looks different than my best friends, right? Like we all have different things that make us who we are and we all have different desires in the way that we want to do things in the world. So it's, it's so much about permission and allowing, you know, allowing myself to do things the way that I want to, but
00:41:21
Speaker
first even recognizing where, what's going on in the first place. And where do I even begin? I hear that a lot. Where do I even begin? Yeah, it's tough. Like the, I mean, it's, it's, it's straight up just developing new mile and sheath pathways in the brain, right? Like you are rewiring. And I just think about, I talk about this a lot with folks where it's like,
00:41:47
Speaker
We've got a lot of things that have shaped us to be the way that we are now. I mean, so many influences of our history, of the bombardment of certain things, the watering of certain seeds, that we have created a ton of different very grooved in pathways in our mind to think and act and do the way that we live.
00:42:15
Speaker
it can take time. Like a lot of people think nutrition is just a eat that's not that kind of thing, right? But there is so much nuance to it and to health in general that like
00:42:28
Speaker
untangling all of the wiring, breaking things down takes time. It takes time to develop new habits too. And I think that it's a huge challenge
Accepting Change in Health and Nutrition
00:42:40
Speaker
for folks and a daunting acceptance to understand that it truly is indeed a process and because it's just not appealing for it to be a process.
00:42:51
Speaker
And so in the nutrition realm, I really hope to find ways to help people embrace the process and journey and kind of like enjoy it, learn to enjoy it, find ways to do that. With what you do, do you A, encounter that very much and B, how, what would you tell people that like have resistance around it taking a while?
00:43:19
Speaker
Yeah, you know, unfortunately we live in a culture where we want things to be fixed now and we want the shortest path possible and maybe even to spend the least amount of money to do it. And the truth is you're making shifts in your life and to get something different, you have to do things differently.
00:43:40
Speaker
You know, even just thinking in the realm of health, I'm certainly not a health expert by any means, but I am a human and can relate to, you know, just thinking about like the lack or taking things away or I have to, you know, like.
00:43:55
Speaker
So if the goal is to feel better, right, coming back to the question, what do I want? I want to feel better. Okay. So now I can do this exercise where every time I say something negative about the things I need to do to feel better, I'm building awareness around that.
00:44:14
Speaker
whether that's a check mark or, or a line on your paper or writing out the actual sentence, but like, Oh, I have to work out. Oh, I don't want to eat that. Oh, I am limited on what the foods I can put in my body. Oh, everyone else can eat however they want to. Right? Like that stuff is stopping you, right? That's, it's not fueling what you want. And I think that the sooner that we can recognize that our thoughts truly navigate our outcome.
00:44:39
Speaker
The sooner the better because the same thing happens in business. Like I want to make all this money and I just want all this time and I want to be free. Okay. We can, that is achievable. But what do you believe about those things? You believe that making money is hard, that you have to work your face off to get it. That money is the root of all evil. Okay. We need to unpack that. Do you believe that you need to fill your calendar? You have to overexert yourself. You have to say yes to everything. Okay. We have to unpack that.
00:45:08
Speaker
Okay. Like we think about the things that we want and again, back to that resistance piece. The thing that we want the most is often behind the thing that we resist the most. So if we look at the thing that resisting, then that can uncover a whole lot about the truth of what's actually really important to us. So it happens, it happens in business every single day.
00:45:28
Speaker
And it's interesting because I'm just very intuitive. I'm a listener, I'm an observer. And so I hear the words and I feel the energy and then I'm like tossing it back across the table and they're like, oh, damn, I didn't even recognize that. And that's what it boils down to is just that autopilot and not even recognizing what you're doing, saying or feeling about the thing that you actually want. Totally.
00:45:53
Speaker
It reminds me, I hope I don't butcher this quote. Do you follow James Wedmore at all? Do you know who that is? I don't. I'm hitting the marks with your resources. No, I know. It's surprising because he's an online business entrepreneur, coach man. He focuses a lot on...
00:46:13
Speaker
He focuses a lot on like the above mindset of entrepreneurs. He's just phenomenal. I really highly recommend him, but he always talks about how, you know, energy goes in the direction where thoughts flow. Energy flows with something along those lines, right? So it is just kind of that like idea where like for me,
00:46:33
Speaker
And business stuff for me has always been extremely appealing based off of the selling markers of so many people with entrepreneurship, right? It's like, have the freedom, have the impact and make the money that you want and all this stuff. And then you kind of get into it and you're like, okay, I really need to make money. And so then you're just focusing on the not having money.
00:46:59
Speaker
And that is extremely limiting in terms of actually providing the energetics that are appropriate for your people because it's like they feel that right. They're like, Oh, like I don't, you know, like this doesn't feel great to buy from the, at least this is kind of what I believe, right? Just kind of in the energy around it all. And at least even with the potential of, of.
00:47:21
Speaker
moving forward in a certain direction, right? If a person is thinking about food, diet, wellness, it's kind of like they're so like afraid or focused on not gaining weight or not getting chronic disease or like feeling, you know, whatever it is, having certain health issues and repercussions with what they're doing that they get so caught up in the, the like kind of lack mindset, but also the, the concern.
00:47:50
Speaker
where it's like, that's where everything is going. And it's like, it's kind of a, no wonder many times that it doesn't actually work out for them because A it's exhausting and B it's like unsustainable, but like C it just doesn't really translate to what they're wanting, right? It's the energy flowing in this negative aura.
00:48:14
Speaker
And to me, it's, it's going to be ultimately unproductive unless it shows them, it doesn't work. And then maybe that would be productive in and of itself. But yeah, so I think, I mean, think of the concept of, you know, when you buy, let's say you buy a yellow car.
00:48:32
Speaker
You know, you don't typically see yellow cars, but now all of a sudden that you've bought a yellow car, you're like, well, everyone's copying me. How is everyone else having yellow car? You're, you're super aware of your yellow car. You think about it daily. You get into it daily. Maybe you've even like dreamed of getting it. So you're thinking about it. Maybe it's on your vision board, right? Even before you physically have it, that's where your energy is focused. That's where your mind is focused. So your brain wants to show you proof that it's possible. It wants to show you proof that it exists.
00:49:02
Speaker
So now all of a sudden you see like a million yellow cars and you're like, where did all these things come from? Why does everybody want what I want? Right? Like it's just because that's what your, your subconscious has woken up to it. And it's grabbed onto that piece and says, Hey, this is important to this person. So let's see more of it. And that's exactly what's happening in the example that you're showing is like, if you're focusing on the lack, the lack you shall keep.
00:49:31
Speaker
Right? Because we're focusing on all the reasons why we can't. And so your subconscious is like this amazingly talented, loving,
00:49:41
Speaker
puppy that wants nothing more than to make you happy. And it doesn't know the difference between good and bad and right and wrong. It just knows that you keep telling it that you can't have this. So it wants to bring back to you, prove why you can't and that perpetuates that's the hamster wheel. And so yes, where are you focus? That's what you end up getting more of. And it's
00:50:04
Speaker
I want to acknowledge that it can be really challenging to shift that. I'm not sitting over here saying that it's just like this magic wand and oh, just do this and it makes it better. It is work to change your life. But what is the alternative? To keep doing what you're doing, to keep feeling the way that you're feeling, to keep having the stuff that you don't want, to keep complaining about stuff to people.
Concluding Thoughts on Choosing Change
00:50:29
Speaker
That's the alternative. So choose the temporary horror that gets you to the thing that you actually want instead. I love that. I honestly, I feel like that.
00:50:39
Speaker
That's a really good place to wrap up, Laura. I love that. I have like other questions I want to ask, but I think that that's, that's beautiful. Um, do you have anything else that you want to, to mention? I definitely want to have you let people know where to find you, but anything else to touch on before then? Yeah. I mean, I think just some parting, some parting words and guidance and love is that you are allowed to want what you want.
00:51:10
Speaker
You are able to change things. You are a thousand times more capable than you're giving yourself credit for. And your mind is either going to be the thing that propels you forward or keeps you living the same example, living the same experience every single day.
00:51:26
Speaker
And so by giving yourself the opportunity to want what you want and give yourself permission to take one step forward, one at a time, not to focus on the bigness, that's a whole different conversation. We're just focusing on the next right step that is for you.
00:51:41
Speaker
You'll create the momentum that you're looking for. You'll create the clarity that you're looking for. You'll create the information that you need to keep moving forward. So, want what you want, you know, without harm of yourself or others, of course, and give yourself permission to do the things that you think about when nobody else is around. Hmm. I truly believe
00:52:04
Speaker
Like, I mean, it seems like a da statement, but it's like, is that not like what will make this world a better place? Imagine if like everyone was more aligned with themselves and everyone was happier. I can't help but think that this world could be a lot cooler than what it actually is.
00:52:27
Speaker
Totally. Well, and I think especially if you if you are aligned with yourself, you also don't project judgment on other people as much and I think that's where things can get really hairy in like
00:52:42
Speaker
And I don't know in the world where there's just like, yeah, like there's a projection on the best ways the better ways that this that that and when you say other people should be living a life in x ways x y and z, even though that's just what's working for you. That's when people get.
00:53:00
Speaker
confused and feel judged and behave in ways that I think really spiral downward, right? That's when comparison comes up so much. That's when we get thrown into a direction that we don't really know are actually good for us and then it just
00:53:19
Speaker
goes crazy from there. Then, then it's 20 years down the line and you've lost yourself. And, um, and I just feel like the more people can pull back judgment, look inward, get to a better place with their own self. Like I just feel like I'm looking out the window right now. I just feel like the weight of the world lifting, you know, it's just like, uh, the dream, you know, absolutely. Well, Laura, where can people find you?
00:53:47
Speaker
Yeah, so the best place to find all things me is at lauraora.com. It's L-A-U-R-A-A-U-R-A.com. That's where you can find out about coaching, classes, upcoming events that I have, and Aura I'm hosting. On social media, I play the most on TikTok. That is my playground and I get pretty unhinged over there. So you can find me, I'm at that Laura Aura.
00:54:10
Speaker
And of course the gutsy podcast, if you want me infused in your brain a little bit more each week, um, it's on Apple podcasts and all the other places where we like to listen. Awesome. Oh, well, thank you so much. And, uh, yeah, possibly continue this conversation down the line too. This is so fun. Absolutely. Thanks for having me. Thank you so much for listening today. If you found this information valuable, please share this episode and give it a review.
00:54:38
Speaker
They truly help a ton. If you want additional support and information, you can head over to my website, teresmartinezrd.com, where you can snag my free guide on how to improve your hunger signals, get on my email list for regular juicy content, or apply for the next round of my signature program, restoring nutrition intuition.
00:54:59
Speaker
Otherwise Instagram at Teresa Martinez RD or my Facebook group fed fit and fad free nutrition with Teresa are always places for more content and support until next time.