Are You Divorcing a Narcissist with Tracy Malone

In this episode of the Her Empowered Divorce Expert Series podcast, Beverly Price interviews Tracy Malone and we talk about Are You Divorcing a Narcissist. Top mistakes people make in divorcing a narcissist, how to protect yourself from post-divorce legal and financial abuse

Tracy Malone Author of 'DIVORCING YOUR NARCISSIST: You Can't Make This Shit Up! Tracy is a divorce coach specializing in narcissistic abuse divorces. The Founder of NarcissistAbuseSupport.com Tracy coaches’ clients from all over the world. You can listen to her podcast or visit her on YouTube.

Tracy Malone Author, Speaker, Educator, and International narcissistic abuse divorce coach. She is a surTHRIVER of abuse herself and the founder of NarcissistAbuseSupport.com. Tracy Bestselling book – DIVORCING A NARCISSIST: You Can’t Make This Shit Up! as well as 32 healing journals. Tracy has a popular YouTube channel and podcast that has reached millions of survivors.

Key Interview Questions that Beverly Asks Tracy:

1.           How are narcissists different in a divorce process?

2.         In your book you mention rich and poor narcissists - why does that matter in a narcissistic divorce? 3

3.        What are some of the tactics a narcissist will deploy during a divorce

4.        What are the biggest mistakes people make when divorcing a narcissist in your book you talk about the grey areas of a divorce decree - can you tell us about that?

5.        What 3 actionable takeaways can you give women that they can do to enhance their journey from beginning to end and recovery from the divorce process

a.  don't underestimate the black and white thinking where you become the evil one,

b.  they must destroy understand the reason it’s important to understand the tactics understand the biggest mistakes

c.    how to protect yourself from post-divorce legal and financial abuse

  

ABOUT TRACY MALONE:

Tracy Malone  Are You Divorcing a Narcissist

CONNECT WITH TRACY MALONE –

What are your website address and social media handles: https://narcissistabusesupport.com [https://www.google.com/url?q=https://narcissistabusesupport.com&sa=D&source=calendar&usd=2&usg=AOvVaw0R5HaxPhrGvTmM8Z7tvL1-] Facebook Group - https://www.facebook.com/groups/188681268196044/ [https://www.google.com/url?q=https://www.facebook.com/groups/188681268196044/&sa=D&source=calendar&usd=2&usg=AOvVaw1VMda7JXJgay-qBEj7pJGw] Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/tracyamalone/ [https://www.google.com/url?q=https://www.instagram.com/tracyamalone/&sa=D&source=calendar&usd=2&usg=AOvVaw0q7o5TyhfVStaoj8_z7cRn] Pinterest - https://www.pinterest.com/tracyamalone/ [https://www.google.com/url?q=https://www.pinterest.com/tracyamalone/&sa=D&source=calendar&usd=2&usg=AOvVaw2pC_Fo0XHYs-S4UkNfP-rX] YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/c/TracyAMalone [https://www.google.com/url?q=https://www.youtube.com/c/TracyAMalone&sa=D&source=calendar&usd=2&usg=AOvVaw2jG25CPjMDJg3qbCM7-gs_] Podcasts - 

Are You Divorcing a Narcissist with Tracy Malone

What are the biggest divorce mistakes to avoid? With Susan Guthrie, Esq. Host of The Divorce & Beyond Podcast.

Key Interview Questions:

1. Which role of mediator, litigator or podcast host do you like the most?

2. What mistakes in divorce do you see most often?

3.  Who is first professional you should hire?

4. How can you come up with a plan for moving forward?

5. What did you learn from your divorce that you incorporate in life today?

What 3 actionable takeaways can you give women that they can do to enhance their journey from beginning to end and recovery from the divorce process

1.    Don’t rush into the process and go to fast. Give yourself grace of space

2.    Form a divorce team – coach, financial professional and litigator

3.    Create a vision for a new life from a blank slate – looking forward, not looking back

ABOUT SUSAN GUTHRIE, Esq.:

Nationally recognized family law attorney, mediator, and Leading Online Mediation Expert, Susan Guthrie® is at it again. After guiding countless numbers of people through the perilous world of divorce—and speaking to a podcast audience of over 4 million listeners—she’s bringing you the The Divorce and Beyond® Podcast with her own insider knowledge and information from some of the top experts in the world

CONNECT WITH SUSAN GUTHRIE -

·      Website - Divorceandbeyondpod.com

·      Instagram: @susanguthrieesq and @divorceandbeyond

CONNECT WITH PODCAST HOST AND DIVORCE AND EMPOWERMENT COACH, BEVERLY:

 * Website - www.herempowereddivorce.com [https://www.herempowereddivorce.com/]
 * Email - beverly@herempowereddivorce.com [beverly@herempowereddivorce.com]
 * Phone: 843-315-8659
 * Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/herempowereddivorce/
 * Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/beverlyprice365/
 * Instagram - www.instagram.com/her_empowered_divorce [https://www.instagram.com/her_empowered_divorce/]
 * LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/beverly-price/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/beverly-price/]
 * Click on the link to schedule a free consultation https://Beverly-Price.as.me/ConsultationCall


SUBSCRIBE TO THE HER EMPOWERED DIVORCE PODCAST

 * Website: https://www.herempowereddivorce.com/podcast
 * Youtube - https://www.youtube.com/@herempowereddivorce1/
 * Apple Podcasts - https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/her-empowered-divorce/id1635143315
 * Spotify - https://open.spotify.com/show/7kIcMXrj1tIWBOmaXBBn1U


If you liked this episode, please don’t forget to leave us a review, subscribe, and share this podcast!

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About your Host, Beverly Price:

Beverly Price, the driving force behind Her Empowered Divorce, has a profound personal connection to the divorce journey, having navigated it herself from the inside out. She intimately understands the spectrum of emotions such as pain, anger, overwhelm, and confusion that accompany divorce, drawing from her own experiences. Her unwavering passion lies in empowering women to navigate divorce in a more positive and informed manner than she did in her own past.

Over many years of dedicated coaching, Beverly has provided invaluable support to tho

The Biggest Divorce Mistakes with Susan Guthrie Esq.

HOW TO PREPARE FOR A DIVORCE

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach

GUEST: Lisa Zeiderman, Matrimonial Attorney, CFL, and Certified Divorce Financial Analyst

SUMMARY:

Preparing for a divorce is a complex and emotionally challenging process that involves multiple facets, from the legal aspects to the emotional well-being of those involved. Understanding how to prepare for it and getting the right people on your team is key to better results. Seeking out an experienced divorce attorney, therapist, divorce coach, and divorce financial analyst as needed to help at different times with different issues can make the journey smoother. Each divorce is unique, so tailoring your preparation to your specific situation is key to achieving the best possible results. In this episode of Her Empowered Divorce, your Host, Beverly Price, talks to Lisa Zeiderman, a matrimonial attorney, CFL, Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, and Managing Partner at Miller Zeiderman LLP, based in New York. Together, they discuss preparations for divorce, the steps you need to take to get the best results, and the professional you need in your divorce team to help you navigate the complexities of divorce, make informed decisions, and work towards a more positive future.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

·      If you are thinking about divorce, you should first sit down and create a spreadsheet of assets, liabilities, and expenses and gather documents such as tax returns, brokerage statements, bank statements, and credit card statements for backup when you consult an attorney.

·      Word of mouth and support group recommendations can help you find a good match for your divorce process. You can also get a good match from bar associations, ABA sites, super lawyers sites, LinkedIn, and podcasts.

·      What should I look for in an attorney, and what questions to ask? Look for an attorney who is listening, understands your situation, and has experience doing the kind of work needed in your case. They need to click, and if you feel like you are in a hustle and have a genuine difference in opinion during the consultation, they might not be a good fit.

·      How can I be the best client for my attorney? The first thing is to be truthful, detailed, timely, and realistic with your expectations. Divorce is like a second job; being truthful, transparent, timely, and realistic will help you get the best results and build a relationship with your attorney.

NOTABLE QUOTES:

·      Overwhelm is how people feel in a divorce, and sometimes attorneys may overlook the fact that you are not used to the terminologies and what is going on. Having a divorce team is crucial because you can ask the divorce coach, therapist, or financial analyst questions to help you understand what's happening. (Lisa)

·      The number one mistake you can make in a divorce is letting your emotions hijack you, so you lose the ability to think clearly and make good decisions. Unless you work through that, your attorney can't be as effective because you are not fulfilling the role of being an educated and informed client. (Beverly)

·      Being truthful is very important; you do not want your attorney to be blindsided or go to court and find out something different from what you are saying because they will look foolish in front of the judge. Make sure you are an accurate recorder. (Lisa)

·      There are so many limitations for settlement, so don't set your standards so high that it's impossible to meet; you need to understand that there is an income that is less to go around, and you ar

How to Prepare for Divorce with Lisa Zeiderman, Esq.

FINANCIAL CONFIDENCE BEFORE, DURING, AND AFTER DIVORCE

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach 

GUEST: Leah Hadley, founder and CEO of Great Lakes Divorce Financial Solutions

 

SUMMARY: 

One of the things that most divorced women struggle with is financial confidence. Financial confidence is a critical factor to consider before, during, and after a divorce. Before divorce proceedings commence, it's essential to have a clear understanding of your financial situation, including assets, liabilities, income, and expenses. This knowledge is a powerful tool that will help you make informed decisions and negotiate equitable settlements. Ultimately, financial confidence involves not only obtaining the necessary financial information but also getting organized and seeking support from a divorce financial specialist who can provide expert guidance in navigating the complex financial aspects of divorce. In this episode of Her Empowered Divorce, your Host, Beverly Price, talks to Leah Hadley, the founder and CEO of Great Lakes Divorce Financial Solutions. Together, they discuss how you can build your financial confidence before, during, and after divorce. 

 

 

KEY TAKEAWAYS: 

 * Financial fears run the gamic when it comes to divorce. So many women are terrified they will run out of money, not have the income to support themselves, and give up the lifestyle and community they enjoy.
 * Financial abuse can show up in various ways, including limited access to financial information, reduced access to finances, and concealed assets. 
 * What kind of financial professionals should I have in my divorce team? When you are going through a divorce, it’s important that you have professionals who have credentials in divorce-specific areas.
 * Even the same assets can have different tax returns, and you have to consider the different implications when negotiating and dividing assets.
 * No matter what assets you want, if you are considering financial security after divorce, you have to prioritize having liquid cash assets when negotiating. Cash is king. Prioritize it and ensure you have access to it. 


 

NOTABLE QUOTES:

 * You should always have access to information about your own financial situation; it’s a big red flag if it’s a trigger or an issue for somebody to bring up a topic around their financial situation. (Bela) 
 * Not every asset comparison is equal; if you want to keep the house and your partner gets the 401k, there are different tax implications that make the net not equal. (Beverly) 
 * If you’re in a situation where you have access to financial information, take advantage of it and make copies of statements; it’s incredible how difficult it can be in some cases to start collecting financial information once the divorce gets started. (Bela) 
 * Get clear on where you lack knowledge and start to increase that knowledge; nobody is born knowing how to manage money well. That is a learned skill, and you can learn by allowing yourself the opportunity. (Bela) 
 * Money doesn’t have power over you; it’s simply a tool you can learn to use well to reach your goals. (Bela) 
 * If you want to keep your marital home and offset that with retirement assets, make sure you understand what you’re giving up because sometimes, when we are looking at the here and now and what will keep us comfortable at the moment, we are giving up something more meaningful and can cause financial difficulty in the future. (Bela) 


 

FURTHER RESOURCES/RELEVANT LINKS: 

Beverly’s personal Facebook page can be found at:

Financial Confidence in Divorce with Leah Hadley, CDFA

GETTING READY FOR DIVORCE. EP 116

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach

GUEST: Lesa Koski, Attorney Turned Mediator President and Founder of Koski Law & Mediation

 

SUMMARY:

 

Getting ready for divorce is a significant and emotionally charged process that requires careful consideration and preparation. It involves not only the legal aspects but also the emotional and financial ones. Before taking this life-altering step, you should seek guidance from a divorce coach to process your feelings, work on your self and understand your reasons for divorce. Working with a professional will help you prepare adequately, gather the right information, and get the right divorce professionals into your team for the best possible outcome.

Preparing for divorce is about safeguarding your future while navigating the process with as much grace and resilience as possible. In this episode of Her Empowered Divorce, your Host, Beverly Price, talks to Lesa Koski, Attorney Turned Mediator President and Founder of Koski Law & Mediation. Together, they discuss how to make the decision to divorce and what the most important steps are.

 

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

●     How do you know that it’s time to divorce? Knowing when it’s time to divorce is personal. Start by working on yourself to grow and work on your marriage, check in with your spouse, too, and get a divorce coach to walk with you. When you have done everything you could, follow your gut and be comfortable with the decision.

●     Divorce should not be taken lightly. If you have made the choice to do it, you should work on yourself and your communication skills to do it in a better way and ensure you don’t go through it again.

●     What is the most important first step to maximize the divorce process? Having a divorce coach is one of the first steps that can save you money in the long run. Knowing your goals, understanding your finances, doing your budget, and looking at your home options will help you get things aligned and do it differently. 

●     How do I share your decision for divorce with family and friends? Be a united front and come added together. That will change the positioning of your divorce outward.    

●     Whether you are getting along or are contentious, having a parenting plan in place can really help. Parenting plans are so important because when you have kids, they are the number one concern when you are getting a divorce. 

 

NOTABLE QUOTES:

 

●     It can be hard to feel good about something like divorce, but you can feel confident about your decision and know you made the right one by being courageous to look at what you are feeling, getting curious about the feeling, looking at the thought process behind them and being capable and consistent in doing that. (Lesa)

●     To clarify your decision about divorce and move forward, evaluate yourself and your spouse; compare that to your ideal partner, and then consider if you are the kind of person they would be attracted to and work on yourself to get there. Don’t be fixated on what you want, but also on becoming the person someone would want to be in a relationship with. (Beverly)

●     So many parents think they want to keep the home for their children after divorce; however, if you are stressed out and can’t afford it, that is not helping your children. Having a home that you can afford is more important than staying in that home that will have you working all the time and feeling stressed. (Lesa)

●  &nbs

How Do I Get Ready For Divorce? with Lesa Koski, Attorney and Mediator

HANDLING THE FINANCIAL ASPECT DURING THE DIVORCE PROCESS. 

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach 

GUEST:  María Gabriella Martinez, CDFA and Founder and Divorce Financial Strategist at Ever After Wealth

SUMMARY: 

The biggest fear in divorce often revolves around money and finances, as the dissolution of a marriage can have a profound impact on one's financial stability and future. However, seeking the expertise of a certified divorce financial analyst (CDFA) can be a crucial step in navigating this complex terrain. With their guidance, you can make informed decisions regarding asset division, alimony, child support, and other financial matters, ultimately working towards a more equitable and secure financial future after divorce. In this episode of Her Empowered Divorce, your Host, Beverly Price, talks to María Gabriella Martinez, a CDFA and the founder and Divorce Financial Strategist at Ever After Wealth. Together, they discuss the importance of having a CDFA as part of your divorce team and how you can protect your financial well-being during this challenging time and move forward with confidence. 

KEY TAKEAWAYS: 

 * Why is it important to have a CDFA involved in the divorce process? Divorce is not just a legal process. It is a monster with three heads, the legal, emotional and financial components, and the best way to tackle it and make the best decision is to have the right experts to help you with each of the three areas.
 * When you are working with a financial advisor or financial planner, they are planning your finances for the future, and when you are going through a divorce, it’s very hard to establish your goals; you should always work with a CDFA from the very beginning because once you address the financial issues you will be very prepared to move forward with the divorce process.
 * What to do if you are considering a major purchase during the divorce process, and what are its implications? It’s very important to understand the kind of financial decisions you can make without having to be part of the divorce process and those that will affect the divorce process.
 * Having a CDFA and a divorce coach on your team is a necessity, not a luxury. You can save so much money by working with experts because you are going to pay a person for their expertise. Taking your emotional conflicts and financial settlement issues to your attorney will cost you more. 


 

NOTABLE QUOTES:

 * Every financial decision you make during the divorce process requires an expert who knows exactly what happens in every situation and the consequences and can prepare you to move forward knowing what to expect. (Maria) 
 * The more successful your divorce is, the more you have to look at it as a business transaction and do it without emotions; you need a clear head because the decision you make will affect the rest of your life. (Beverly)
 * When you are going through a divorce, there is a divorce law, and it’s going to trump any financial rules that you have, so walk with a divorce financial expert. (Maria) 
 * You can get the best financial information in the world, but if you are not in a good emotional state to make decisions, you will have a hard time making decisions and might make the wrong decisions. (Maria) 
 * So many women in the divorce process are often afraid and upset because they don’t understand the financial aspect, but the attornies cannot explain that without the right information, which is why working with a CDFA is crucial. (Maria) 
 * Divorce is overwhelming, and it’s important to stop and think about yourself and do what gives you comfort. You have to self-care and find experts to help you; it’s an investment, and you have

Don't Handle Your Divorce Finances Alone! With Maria Gabriella Martinez, CDFA

PARENTING COORDINATOR'S ROLE IN RESOLVING CUSTODY CONFLICTS

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach

GUEST:  Jaime Davis, Co-Managing Partner at Gailor Hunt and Host of A Year and a Day: Divorce without Destruction

 

SUMMARY:

A parenting coordinator plays a crucial role in helping divorcing parents navigate the often tumultuous terrain of co-parenting after a divorce. Their primary objective is to assist in making decisions related to child custody, visitation, and other parenting matters in an amicable and child-focused manner. They act as neutral third-party facilitators, using their expertise in family law and child development to help parents reach mutually beneficial agreements. In this episode of Her Empowered Divorce, your Host, Beverly Price, talks to Jaime Davis, a Co-Managing Partner at Gailor Hunt and Host of A Year and a Day: Divorce without Destruction. Together, they discuss parenting coordinators, who they are, and their role in fostering a more collaborative and harmonious co-parenting relationship to create a stable and supportive environment for children's growth and well-being.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

●     Who is a parenting coordinator, and what role do they play in family law cases? A parenting coordinator is a neutral third party who has received training to become a parenting coordinator. In high cases involving the custody of children, the court can appoint a parenting coordinator to assist the parents in making decisions for their kids.  

●     The different areas of authority that a parenting coordinator can help with can range from pick-up time for the child, health care management, and communication between parents and children. However, their scope of authority can vary from case to case.

●     What is the difference between a parenting coordinator and a parenting coach? A parent coordinator's decision is usually like a binding court order. So if a parenting coordinator issues a directive and one of the parents does not follow it, the other parent can ask for a baby holding contempt for violating the directive. A parenting coach is more focused on getting the parents to work together and facilitating communication.

●     Do parenting coordinators take over all the decisions when the conflict is great and the parents are far apart? Each parent coordinator does it differently, but regardless of the level of acrimony, it is very important that the parents try to agree on the issues first, and when they can't the parent coordinator can step in and be the tiebreaker.

 

NOTABLE QUOTES:

 

●     When a couple is getting a divorce, decisions for the kids can be some of the things being disagreed about. In these types of cases, a parenting coordinator can be very helpful by being the tiebreaker when mum and dad disagree on a decision for the child. (Jaime)

●     One of the benefits of having a parent coordinator is that the children can have what they need in a more timely manner. (Jaime)

●     Your parenting coordinator is going to be making the decision when you and your partner disagree on things. It is almost like having a third parent in the relationship. (Jaime)

●     Part of the parent coordinator's job is to work themselves out of a job, getting parents to a place where they can make decisions without them and their children because they know what is best for their family. (Jaime)

●     At any time during a custody dispute, either parent can ask the court to appoint a parent coordinator, and the court wi

What is a Parenting Coordinator? with Jaime Davis Esq.

HANDLING ALCOHOL ABUSE IN DIVORCE AND COPARENTING EP 113

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach

GUEST: Chris Beck, VP of Family Law Business Development for Soberlink Healthcare

 

SUMMARY:

Handling alcohol abuse in divorce and co-parenting is a complex and emotionally charged issue, as approximately 50% of divorces cite heavy drinking as a contributing factor. This not only shatters marriages but also casts a shadow of fear over co-parenting relationships. Concerns about a child's safety can be particularly agonizing, leading to questions like, "Will my child be safe?" In such situations, trust and transparency between the co-parents become paramount. Ensuring the well-being of the children should be the primary focus, with both parents working together to create a safe and nurturing environment and seeking professional guidance if alcohol abuse remains a concern. In this episode of Her Empowered Divorce, your Host, Chris Beck, the VP of Family Law Business Development for Soberlink Healthcare. Together, they discuss alcohol abuse and what can be done if alcohol abuse is an issue in your divorce and co-parenting.

 

KEY TAKEAWAYS: 

●     Does Sober Link give definitive proof about alcohol use? Soberlink is self-administered, and there is no middle person giving you the results. It's a breathalyzer that is combined with facial recognition technology, and internally, it has a way to submit the result in real time through Bluetooth and cyber technology.

●     How can I prove I can be trusted if I have a history of distrust? The pain point of losing trust to a point where monitoring is necessary is great, but Soberlink gives the other parent or the concerned party peace of mind that what is happening is real, as sobriety is documented in real-time, hence building trust back-to-back.

●     Can the alcohol test be done before the other parent talks to the child on a call to make sure they are sober? Yes definitely. Where there is severe alcohol use, treatment is ongoing, or visitation is done via Zoom, part of the program is testing and documenting their sobriety before the call, and you get and validate the compliant test results.

●     Why should I choose Soberlink over other alcohol monitoring technologies? Soberlink has robust technology that ensures the quality of their product is there. It's handheld, used remotely in real-time, and has family law-specific programs, technologies, and customer service.

●     No matter the situation, it's possible to keep a parent who is struggling with alcohol use disorder with the right treatment and the right technology to support the treatment. Technology is here to help you, help your child, and keep them safe. It's in the best interest of the child when both parents are part of their life.

 

NOTABLE QUOTES:

●     Being able to prove that you are sober when parenting your children is empowering. (Chris) 

●     Having a technology that shows proof of sobriety, especially during co-parenting time, helps to mend the relationship, build trust back-to-back sooner, and bring the family immunity back. (Chris)

●     Family law can now do alcohol monitoring discreetly because of technology like facial recognition, and it doesn't have to be done in the presence of children. It can be self-administered and still give transparency to others that are part of the monitoring agreement. (Chris)

●     When someone has alcohol use disorder, they will do whatever they can to make sure they get the next drink, and Soberlink ha

Why Alcohol and Divorce Don't Mix with Chris Beck, Soberlink

THROUGH THE EYES OF A FORENSIC ACCOUNTANT'S POINT OF VIEW

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach

GUEST: Tracy Coenen, Forensic Accountant and Fraud Coach for Divorce

 

SUMMARY:

Are you worried about hidden money and concealed assets in your divorce process or are you entangled in a complex financial situation where transparency is crucial? Navigating these circumstances can be overwhelming, leaving you with questions about the whereabouts of undisclosed funds, the total value, and the extent of expenditures. Getting a clear picture of your financial situation and seeking professional help to address these concerns is essential in ensuring a just and equitable settlement and the much-needed peace of mind during this challenging period. In this episode of Her Empowered Divorce, your Host, Beverly Price, talks to Tracy Coenen, Forensic Accountant and Fraud Coach for divorce. Together, they discuss how you can find hidden money in your divorce, how to identify red flags, and the nontechnical ways to gain insight into your financial situation independently.

 

Divorce doesn’t have to be a death sentence. With the right support and guidance, you can move through the process with knowledge, skills, and confidence. If you’d like to schedule a complimentary private consultation, reach out to Beverly at: https://beverly-price.as.me/Consultation.

 

Visit https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/her-empowered-divorce/id1635143315 to access the entire archive of Her Empowered Divorce episodes, and while you’re there, please subscribe, rate, and review our show!

 

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

●     Knowledge is power, and you should not sign a settlement without having a clear picture of your financial situation. Even if you are not suspicious and want the divorce over with, you still need all the facts before you sign the settlement agreement because you only have one chance to get the right settlement.

●     “I just wanted to be done” is a common statement after divorce that often comes from the biggest mistake most women make: letting the emotions hijack them to the point of throwing off their hands, taking whatever is on the table, and settling it.

●     “Let's save money. We don’t need an attorney.” When your spouse tries to rush you into the agreement without an attorney, this is a big red flag. You need someone on your side to help you evaluate things objectively.

●     There is a whole laundry of red flags, but some of the most common in a divorce situation is a behavior change, which could be a change in schedule and whereabouts, how they are spending money, how they are paying for things, and not giving you access to money and financial information.

●     If you are thinking about filing a divorce, the first thing you should do is to gather information. Information is your friend; get all the statements for your joint accounts before you say anything to your spouse. 

 

NOTABLE QUOTES:

●     You might trust your spouse and think that those couple of accounts you don’t have the statements for aren’t a big deal, but why is he not disclosing the statements to you if they weren’t a big deal and there is nothing to worry about? (Tracy)

●     Money and finance are the biggest concerns for people in divorce, and one of the biggest expenditures is going to be for your attorney, but b

Through the Eyes of a Forensic Accountant with Tracy Coenen

MEDIATION, HOSTILITY, AND EMOTIONS EP 111 

HOST: Beverly Price, Divorce & Empowerment Coach 

GUEST: Ellice (Lisa) Halpern, Founder/Principal Mediator, Little Falls Mediation

 

SUMMARY: 

 

The divorce process can be challenging, triggering a torrent of emotions that range from fear, grief, loss, sadness, and anxiety to anger and frustration. In such trying times, effective mediation can serve as a vital lifeline, offering a safe space to express your feelings and concerns without descending into hostility. Mediation provides a structured platform for open communication and negotiation for fairness, enabling spouses to work through their issues with the help of a neutral third party. By addressing the underlying emotions and grievances constructively, mediation strives to pave the way for amicable resolutions and, in the process, helps ease the burdens of separation, preserves relationships, and fosters a sense of closure and healing. In this episode of Her Empowered Divorce, your Host, Beverly Price, talks to Ellice (Lisa) Halpern, Founder/Principal mediator of Little Falls Mediation. Together, they discuss mediation, hostility, and emotions to provide you the tools to navigate your divorce journey with stability, control, grace, and resilience. 

 

KEY TAKEAWAYS: 

 * What does mediation look like when done the right way? The most important thing about mediation is to empower you to have control over the process and the outcome.
 * There are four prompts for Mediation: Identify the issue, pick an issue and brainstorm all kinds of options, evaluate those options by asking questions and doing reality testing, and come to a joint decision. 
 * How do I identify a great mediator vs. a not-so-great mediator? It depends on what you are looking for, but check if they are certified by your state, if you are comfortable talking to them, and if they have the qualities you want, such as kindness, rapid response, and confidence. 
 * I want my mediation results to be fair. In mediation, you have the flexibility you don’t have in court. In court, the judge gives an order, but in mediation, you can negotiate what is fair to you.   


 

NOTABLE QUOTES:

 * Acknowledging your emotions during meditation will empower you, create a legitimate sense of control and fairness, and create the opportunity to preserve the relationship. (Ellice) 
 * Making mediation a business-like transaction, putting those emotions aside, and viewing it as a neutral business transaction is not easy, but it can be done. (Beverly) 
 * Mediation is not therapy, but it does not ignore the emotions; you are allowed to pause, take a break, get a drink, and choose whether you want to continue or not. (Ellice) 
 * The cornerstone of meditation is disclosure and confidentiality, and it’s voluntary, so if someone does not want to share financial information, they are not a candidate for mediation. (Ellice) 
 * Mediation can be a tool used in situations of domestic violence, but when there is abuse, a lawyer can help you in a better way than mediation. (Ellice) 
 * It’s important for you to have professionals you can consult with, whether it’s a lawyer, divorce financial neutral, tax person, parenting coordinator, therapist, divorce coach, or real estate professional, who can guide you along the way with your mediator. (Ellice) 


 

ABOUT OUR GUEST: 

 

Ellice (Lisa) Halpern launched Little Falls Mediation in early 2015 to help private clients who approached her to mediate issues related to marriage, separation, and divorce, as well as business and community matters. Little Falls Mediation is

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